Healing from the Collateral Damage Part III: Friendships

#deprescribing #benzowithdrawal #psychiatricmedications
This is a series on healing from the collateral damage of psychiatric drugs and withdrawal.

[@incognito595]

Angie, there is no way to sustain a normal friendship through this hell. The only one's who will be able to ride this out with us are extraordinary people. Those are very few and far between.

[@TruthTeller-ez7ev]

I had two amazing friends for a decade for 18-28. Both died consecutive years in 2019 and then 2020. It's tough to rebuild form here, but I trust when the time is right I will find my circle. I miss the closeness and love of a friend. I got a dog recently and that helps.

[@harmedbuthealing]

Love everything about this video. If you lose friends through standing up for yourself and being authentic, then they are not your people

[@elainewalters460]

Thank you for this. I JUST had a friend I haven’t talked to since my setback (because I can’t talk to anyone. I simply don’t have the capacity) send me a text ending our friendship because, “I was there for you and now I’m going through something and you never even sent me a text.” I burst into tears…at work. All of this is SO unlike me. I don’t reach out to ANYONE. I can’t 😢

[@kristianmuus5672]

Hi everyone, including angie. I wish you all a better year than the year before. We are in this together. All the best to you, keep fighting.

[@lisasmith814]

Love this video Ang !! I put up with shit from NO ONE now too 😂😂😂

[@djammer]

My friends are lifers, they’re never getting rid of me

[@doeboy1103]

Keep pouring into the right people!!! You deserve nothing but the best

[@user-lm7hl8zr8q]

God work Angie 💜

[@pamela9270]

Thanks for this message. It took me about a year off to realize that no one can see my suffering. It was so intense that I thought everyone could see right thru me and recognize just how much suffering I was in. It was a rude awakening. I'm ending month 16 off. My perspective on people has changed a lot. I can't tolerate people who can't own their shit. I'm also hyper aware of unsafe people. I need to keep some at a distance which is sad because its a family member. I think I used to put up with a lot just to keep the peace. I don't think its that difficult to be a nice kind person but apparently a lot of people do. Seeing the world differently now. 💛

[@HeartNxs]

Hi Angie!! Thank you!!! And you look soooo good girl…healthy!

[@edgetransit3320]

Ppl think what we are going through isn’t bad or it’s all in our head. Like we’re exaggerating. They think they can handle what we’re going through so easily. I’m 9 months off in 8 days. Just want this all to end. Suffered from an anxiety disorder due to bad childhood trauma since 13. 17 years of suffering and now I have to deal with withdrawal cause doctors don’t know anything. I’m only still alive cause of my mom. If she wasn’t here, I would’ve been gone

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

I am glad you are still here but I can relate to being worse off than how you started because of the harm the system has caused you. I am sorry. Life will be better since you took your power back.

[@edgetransit3320]

I've been strong my whole life, I can't be like this for years and years. I hope by the end of this year, I am healed or at least see a good amount of progress. I can't even work right now or even play my video games cause it's too stimulating. I'm going crazy. Suffering since I was a child and now this. I don't know what god wants me to do anymore. Why do I have to suffer this much :( @@AngiePeacockMSW

[@edgetransit3320]

Sorry I shouldn't unload on you like this. @@AngiePeacockMSW

[@MsCarmel55]

Good advice Angie, it could not be said any better! I have one or two friends who knows and been supportive although I keep the ugly stuff to myself or seek support in my groups. I don't them to be overburdened. My bestie in Toronto told me I have my light back and seem sharper then when I last saw her in September. It's good to have someone outside of you to notice the changes!

[@user-ww7qs8kc1x]

I am going to use this video for my own practice! What an amazing resource that you have provided. Thank you so much! And addressing “neuro-emotion” is excellent. Great advice for coaches who invest so much in clients and don’t have time for toxic friendships.

[@idesigncutethings2196]

I am sorry to hear you've had to cut ties with some folks along the way. We just don't have the bandwidth for bullshit after what we've been through. I like these video series on topics that you are doing. They are very helpful. Most of my friends take these meds. Some I already had to "break up" with cuz they were not healthy for me in other ways & it was just time to end it. Later down the road, once I am healed & able to do more, it'll be interesting to see if I can stay in a friendship with people who take psychotropic meds. Especially when I've seen some tolerance withdrawl symptoms starting to happen for some. Only time will tell. In the meantime I have much gratitude for those who have stood by my side. Especially the ones who know the full story. That's only about 2 or 3 people. So thankful for them. I mesh well with earthy people, good natured people, who have a heart of gold.

[@gloriadavis9829]

Thanks!

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Thank you so much Gloria! 💜

[@reneeraw6927]

I’m gonna bring up a sensitive topic. I hope this is okay. I am just beginning my tapering process. I mentioned this (probably shouldn’t have) to someone I know. This person is also on a similar medication and probably should be tapering off too. But they are very lazy, in general, in all aspects of their life. They will most likely never get off their medication. I can even see this individual justifying to me why they would never taper off. Like a list of excuses as to why it would “just be too hard”. Meanwhile, I have always been an over achiever and an extremely hard worker throughout my entire life. I find myself having negative feelings towards this person. Kinda like, she’s taking “the easy pass” by staying on her meds and I’m here doing the hard work. I know we all get to make our own decisions regarding our medication and whether we stay on or taper off. But I am finding this person triggering to me. Can anyone relate to this?

[@kristajeanne572]

I can relate to all of this, as you know. I'm sorry your "friends" treated you poorly, too. I'm lucky to have one great friend who tries to understand and is there for me. She has MS and some of our symptoms are similar and she's had a lot of experience not being seen or understood, either. It's too bad the rest of the population has such a hard time with empathy. I'm wondering, do you have trust issues with people after all this? And if so, how are you dealing with it?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Eh, I wouldn’t say trust issues so much, I just don’t expect much. I give people a little and see what they do with it. If they fuck that up, I stop giving them my spoons. I listen to my instincts more than ever too and I don’t give my friendship to people who can’t reciprocate or who don’t have their shit together

[@helenclark2368]

Angie, great advice. Thank you this video!

[@elldev33]

Video request: how to approach the trauma of what we’ve been through. I’m just over a year off, things are starting to get better, but my brain falls back into the rut of “see I told you nothing was ok!” so quickly when even slightly bad things happen. I push myself to get out, doing small vacations, etc. Stress tolerance is so low and I keep thinking - how the heck do I set this experience down. It’s hard not to keep reviewing what the hell happened and trying to make sense of it. Will it just fade? Would CPT help? Do I need to write a memoir? 😂 it’s hard to wrap my brain around what I’ve been through

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Great idea for a video. There are 3 coming next week about therapy. I’ll make a 4th to add to your topic so be sure to watch those 3 first then I’ll post the 4th next week.

[@Maria-zr7ph]

Yes! I have developed severe health anxiety as a result of this experience. To have such severe symptoms for so long and non stop with no tests to show you what it is leaves me thinking there has to be something more serious going on 😞Also not being able to tell what is an old symptom or a new symptom. It’s so exhausting and learning to trust the body again is probably one of the hardest parts.

[@elldev33]

@@Maria-zr7phyes! I am trying to learn to trust my body - but man we’ve been through some stuff 😂 I push myself to workout but it feels like I could absolutely die at any moment. I have decided to call my Limbic systems bluff on that. I push it with a workout and I say ok, I’ll either die or get stronger. I’ve fully accepted that either is ok. What a wild game recovery is.

[@elldev33]

@@AngiePeacockMSWThe trickiest part (as I’m sure you know well) is that it feels like it’s never over. If I could say “yeah I had all of these awful symptoms, but they’re gone and I’m putting it behind me” that would really help. To have waves come back - or just small windows where it lets up is so demoralizing. It just drives the fear deeper. I have a lot of the same visual things you have had. It doesn’t ever go away, some days it’s a bit better and I don’t notice it, but other days it’s all encompassing and truly scary. Like SOMETHING ELSE HAS TO BE WRONG! The whole trick of not believing everything you think is key, but when it keeps coming back it makes you feel like you’re gaslighting yourself. I’m a medical person and to not be able to “figure this out” has been maddening. Why, in the middle of the day, do I suddenly have all of the symptoms, then it lets up?! I literally cannot figure it out and I have to set it down, but man it’s my health and whole life! That breeds ocd-like feelings and to set it down feels like abandoning myself somehow (?) don’t know if that makes sense. It’s like to heal you have to give up on trying to understand it and just wait. For YEARS. 😬 I’m a fixer not a waiter 😂

[@cm23307]

What is the "S" word?

[@AngiePeacockMSW]

Suicidal

[@shan4145]

Thank you Angela !💎 🫂💖🌷🇨🇦🙋🏻‍♀️. Your ex friends are Shit! . Even when one of them went through benzodiazepines and still treat you like that like what the fuck? Now I know more invaluable knowledge. We are to nice and empathetic . I too, will cut you off drama meter lol. I don’t like people lol