Overthinking: How Improving The QUALITY Of Our Thoughts Can Fix QUANTITY Errors

[@andrew.gardiner]

Thank you, Heidi. You did NOT miss your calling. God bless you for leaning into your gift, and for showing up so kindly, so vulnerably, and so authentically. TBH - every single video that you have carefully & thoughtfully created contain multiple insights, lessons and teachings that are each so incredibly valuable, relevant, and HELPFUL. I’m 62 years old, Heidi, and TBH - you have taught me more in a year, than the lifetime of all the formal education, ‘therapy’ and coaching that I’ve received. Please keep up the good work. You are making a profound impact on me, and surely countless others. XOXO Andrew

[@kmcq692]

Yep. Something about her videos allows me to synthesize all that stuff I’ve tried to learn. Magic.

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

hear, hear ❤ Thank you, Heidi for sharing 🎉

[@AmazingJane137]

Totally agree

[@m.g.4830]

Exactly. Thank you so much Heidi and everyone also for putting in the work to improve your lives ❤

[@joshliam1967]

Ditto to everything Andrew said. You're helping people change their lives, Heidi.

[@joshliam1967]

Anyone else need to listen to a Heidi video twice before it sinks in? There's just so much to take in, in the best way, because every video is a masterclass. Thank you Heidi.

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

I went back to listening a few of her older videos and realised some things I’ve managed to instill in myself, but also discovered loads of new things I didn’t catch before?!! must be a “when the student is ready the teacher will appear” kinda situation!🎉

[@barbelarmbroster6524]

Yes, and it takes time to digest the stuff! ⏳⌛⏳⌛

[@aidanfrazier9399]

I listen to it once, think I understand it, and then often don't use the information when it could help me. On rewatch I think 'aha okay I learned this but I didn't prepare to actually apply it and so I didn't'

[@ksdevichand366]

I myself take a note while watching her videos

[@joshliam1967]

@@ksdevichand366 That's a really good idea, I may start doing that too.

[@tiberiusruiz4781]

I landed on your videos by accident 1 year ago after a break up, I wanted to desperately heal and I was so confused about my thoughts and did not understand how I would feel so broken, I hated myself for my inability to process emotions and falling into substance abuse often to regulate…1 year forward I will have to say that there was a pivotal moment where your knowledge and voice provided the regulation I needed, iv learned so much and I’m forever thankful that your videos and your willingness to genuinely help are here, my life could probably have tipped in the wrong path if I had not stumbled into you, my therapist has helped me stay afloat but you have helped me understand how I can love myself best and be less critical, I’m sure I’m not the one that has been impacted like this, you have a natural gift and I hope god or the universe or whatever you believe in, gives you all the success in the world, cause you deserve it, Thank you from the bottom of my heart Heidi you’re the best friend/mom/spiritual guide everyone needs

[@lynnperry-smith3477]

I have been stuck in ruminating thoughts for the better part of two weeks. I finally asked myself what would help me to shift out of this dysfunctional endless cycle. Almost immediately this video came up on my feed. I learned invaluable information from watching this video. Things I wished I would have known sooner in my life. Thank you for these teachings. I realize I knew the answer all along and the things I thought were bothering me we're not the real problem. I already feel some relief in my body. Infinite blessings and gratitude!

[@twilfits]

Same. I tell myself, ' The monster's inside the house and it's you." I'm the one who doesn't value me

[@TamaraTkacova]

Your videos have sigle-handedly changed the trajectory of my life for the better, you are such a treasure. Thank you for doing what you do ♡

[@havenmotel]

Being autistic I often find it difficult to articulate my thoughts in conversation. I’ve been told that I overthink or say too much to make a single point. This might be because I struggle to determine what’s relevant (as you say). When it comes to being autistic, I have to be consciously aware of the context (vs it being unconscious or automatic), making it very difficult to know what’s pertinent in a particular conversation. It doesn’t help that people often imply meanings rather than stating them directly. Anyway you’ve given me something to reflect on and another way to explain my propensity to overthink. Thanks!

[@IshtarBellydancer]

I’m not autistic but I struggle to be relevant because I always end up on a tangent in communication - one subject triggers other thoughts and subjects go off relevance ! I think the Myers Briggs personality analysis types maybe what makes us approach subjects by our personality bias.

[@cloudsurvivalnote]

Bro I was literally overthinking and thought to find a video on it to calm myself down and the first thing I see on my YT page is this😂 I love you Heidi!

[@viperb4148]

Same

[@prashanthireddy2333]

hello heidi preiebe , you are the reason i am alive 😢❤ thankyou …, FA here 😢 still making mistakes

[@ReneeB-mz9cx]

Mistakes are necessary and a gift! It's the only way we can really learn

[@laurawhite24-7]

I’m glad you are alive❤

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

I hope you find peace, and the freedom to let go of what your brains have labelled as mistakes. It is such a wonderful gift to be able to learn from it ❤

[@bobbyc1120]

My favorite thing about Heidi's videos is that I feel like I'm developing with her. I started out watching the videos from 3 years ago, as I was able to identify so many of my issues through them. And now I'm here. Listening to Heidi deconstruct thought itself, and taking down the dichotomy between logic and emotion. I'm so here for it. Thank you Heidi for sharing these videos with us.

[@adribbs]

As someone who over thinks, it's always two things that get me: Not knowing how people would react and how would I be viewed. Instead of checking internally as to why I feel this way, I would be more worried about others' feelings. Not to say being concerned for others is inherently bad, quite the opposite in some cases. However I never took proper care of myself emotionally and just chalked it up to, "If everyone else is okay, then I'm okay." I truly realize that's not the healthiest way to handle situations. Your videos and some self reflecting has helped me become more emotionally in sync than I've ever been. I'll always be a work in progress, but I'm more comfortable expressing myself and understanding the why I feel what I do. Thank you Heidi.

[@twilfits]

Same everyone 1st. I'm working on it. I was brought up to believe it was honorable to put everyone 1st. I remember my mom seated last, eating last and 1st to clear the table after cooking all day. That stuff sticks. Ugh

[@lokihiggs6579]

babe, wake up, new heidi video dropped!

[@user-vv4oe8xl2t]

😂

[@fancyname5997]

Honestly!😂

[@pass3592]

Exactly!

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

it’s 5:24am here, i’m here for it 🎉

[@sandradonovan5991]

Right???😂❤

[@Datb2]

Genuinely calmed me down from my overthinking lol

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

This week I said to myself I will step out of the house everyday - even though I had no reason to do so - just because I said I would do it. Just for one week. On the first day, it was just 10 minutes but it made me smile inside upon returning home. Today is the third day (I said I would venture out to the shops nearby with a camera) and I almost succumbed to my brains saying, “It’s been such a lovely morning, why not continue staying inside. No one will know”… …then an image of Heidi’s face popped up, “Do it even though you don’t feel like it” 😂 So I’ve kept the promise to myself so far 🎉 Heidi, I hope you remember how you’re helping so many people (waving hi from Malaysia). I wish you well, peace and lots of love back too. And your inner child too. We all love you loads 🎉❤

[@melissasmuse]

❤

[@riarandomo]

I love this, glad to hear you are benefiting from it! I also like to set myself little games/ rules like this, they do always help, I forget how much

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

@@riarandomo i carry my camera along with me and I guess it helps me focus on looking around for a nice shot - that distracts me from other less useful thoughts x

[@Judymontel]

Whooo, boy! Grice's maxims set off so many alarm bells... when you are dealing with executive function issues, it can be challenging to sort it all out!! So much to chew on - thank you!

[@Alex-js5lg]

I suppose where I get stuck is that I understand the problems of a traumatic/stressful situation I'm trying to cope with, but I get so dysregulated just from thinking about it. I can put distance between myself and the situation, but I can't leave it entirely, and the more space I take, the more guilt I feel about not helping as much as I should/could. I'm trying to basically rebuild my life at the same time, and while I have some of the necessary skills to assist with the situation, my complicated history with one of the involved people leads to me dissociating. I'm already overwhelmed/burnt out just trying to deal with my own issues, so I think radical acceptance is necessary, but trying that approach leads me to a lot of unhealthy coping mechanisms to cope with the emotions that result. I can relate to your trail mix story! That's how I feel any time I have to buy something for someone else: what's the _perfect_ gift, meal, destination, etc. I think that's me trying to solve an emotional problem (anxiety) logically (by weighing options).

[@delaines5041]

I also do a lot of 'the perfect gift' thinking. When I ask myself Why, there is always more than 1 answer. I love to see their face light up cos it's something they love and it makes them feel good. They will like me more if it's a perfect gift. Jealousy has shown up in me when someone else's gift has been more 'perfect' than mine (and I don't like feeling that). In the end I guess it's just me trying to feel good about myself - that I am worthy. Is that an emotional problem?

[@SusanaXpeace2u]

This is helpful. I feel SO hurt when friends all have better friends. But they don't OWE me anything. It's just so painful though. It hurts more than it should because my mother gives me the silent treatment for not seeing things through her lens.

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

I don’t know what to say. But I’m sending you loads of hugs and love ❤🎉 Know and remember your worth ⭐️✨🌟💫🌟

[@sentencemaker]

This video illustrates a terrific application of methodologies from the fields of pragmatics and DA to the field of clinical psychology. Heidi, you rock.

[@MargaretMAnderson]

Nice sentences you made here. 😍

[@lolamateos7409]

love your username jaja

[@ericniles4867]

You really struck a chord with me when you brought up emotional regulation in relation to the need to express ourselves in a relevant manner. I feel I’m often at a loss of how to exactly express myself. With a little self compassion and an eye toward honest motives, I think I could sort out some of the issues in my life that are emotional , but perhaps unfocused. What a great lesson!

[@horizon521x]

Thank you Heidi! As weird as it sounds I hear you in my head all the time after listening to so many of your videos. Like a psychiatrist living in my head, I hear your advice and constantly self correct as my day goes by. Your knowledge of the human mind is impeccable and I wanted to applaud you for helping so many people. 👏👏👏

[@Alex-js5lg]

On the topic of existentialism, I think belief systems are an answer to the larger questions are unanswerable. Being aspiritual and areligious, I think I spent a year or two obsessing over the origins of the universe, the mechanisms that create our reality, the nature of consciousness, how time works, what happens after death, and whether free will is real or perceived until I finally arrived at my own structure of beliefs. I still go through phases of consuming as much information as I can on some of those topics, but I find comfort in the notion that death will likely feel the same as the 14B years that happened before my birth. And you know what? I suffered less during those billions of years than I have in the last few decades.

[@vazzaroth]

[INTP] I used to think I overthought. After years and years, and ADHD dx and a bunch of both therapy and psychedelics I've come to realize it's overly agile, IE overly ACTIVE thinking, not necessarily OVER thinking. I can't stay on a single track to save my life unless I'm doing what I'm doing right now which is actually physically write it out into tangible reality in one line. I'll decide "I will do X" and by the time I've even moved my foot 1 inch to go do X, I've already had not one, not two, but three other thoughts. So of course I feel like I'm confused all the time, I'm branching out my thoughts in all directions at once, all the time. There is no particular point to all of this besides that it's my solution for a novelty seeking brain that is chronically under stimulated and is an adaptive mechanism, I theorize, for a world that told me 'sit still and stop overreacting' all the time since I was never DX'd or given any professional help during my rural upbringing. I do somewhat fear it's kinda just engrained forever now, but also know that even if that's not true my REAL issue that I LIKE being this way WAY WAY too much to authentically want to change.

[@vemrith]

same [ENFP]

[@kendrabueckert1750]

Heidi thank you soooooo much for your channel and sharing your thoughts and wisdom. Love you. 🥰

[@pratyusharvind9995]

I just want to thank you heidi, I have been on a rough spot in my and trying to attain my potential by growing out of the fearful Avoidant and other impulsive tendencies and you have no idea how much of an insight your videos have given me So, well just taking a moment to thank you

[@GiveHerFlowers]

Girl…it’s like you know me personally…

[@mariajoy4541]

It honestly feels like ever since 2021 when I first went searching for answers and stumbled across some of your very first videos to now, that every time I have something troubling me you have always released a relevant video within the past 4-8 weeks, and this is no exception. I wish I was just half as smart and articulate as you. You have changed my life.

[@juliegazzoli3553]

A few years ago, my boss told me that to help me get right to the point, she'd like me to pretend that I'm calling the person and waking them up at 2 am. That helped somewhat, but I had never understood, until now, why I overthink and over talk. Thanks again--as so many have said before, your videos are incredibly helpful.

[@kawanclinton950]

Love this and will use this with my boss

[@kapsi]

Than you for another video Heidi. You're an angel.

[@jowiens32]

The funny thing is, I just realized I am watching videos on KZbin to avoid over thinking because I can’t sleep. I really appreciate your chat off! I’ve only recently started listening, but I have learned so much already. Thank you so much.

[@shelbytimbrook2095]

Thank you for these videos. I'm finding they help put words to what I'm feeling so I can make sense of it all. I use to watch them thinking "none of this applies to me" and the more I learn about myself the more I'm going back and watching the older videos realizing it absolutely applies to me, I just didn't realize it.

[@shabgerye]

Every video, is masterclass with do much calmnand elegance ❤ 1)Whats true 2)Whats relevant 3) What problem am I trying to solve

[@tehjaculaaa3069]

As someone who lives in colorado, that was the most relatable example! 😂

[@susie5254]

The snacks example applies to me big time. We had guests this weekend and I was obsessed with preparing in a way they would be comfortable. I like this couple very much and am grateful to them for helping us when we lived in their city. I could not relax while thinking about what foods to shop for, how to prepare the meals and snacks so that they'd be happy. I am obsessed about making all our guests feel comfortable, to the point where I wish I wouldn't have any guests at all! I know it was not normal and now, in this video, you have explained it. Thank you.

[@kaci6411]

Heidi I truly think you must know whatever I’m struggling with every time you release a video. I love you 😭😭

[@bobbyc1120]

You might enjoy Loevinger's ego development theory. I'm a huge fan of it. It outlines the stages of development in the way we structure our egos, and it aligns very well with what Heidi talks about. It suggests that she's poking at universal truths about how the human mind works, coming at it from different angles.

[@kaci6411]

@@bobbyc1120 sounds interesting, will definitely check it out!!

[@alonsodeleon4694]

I was watching this video having just seen an example of overthinking when it comes to dance this past weekend. Someone was asking the dance instructor questions on the counts of steps more than once while I (and I think multiple people in the room) was thinking to myself "if you just do it, you'll have all your questions answered." Thanks for the insight into other examples of overthinking!

[@JDT-xj1tw]

Hi Heidi. First I want to express my appreciation for your videos, there are extremely helpful to me in trying to heal the wounds from the frankly horrific childhood I had. I don't know if you will see this, but I have a question, if you could take a few minutes to answer it. I find that you have a mix of compassion but also no-nonsenseness that I think is needed for this problem. You talk about the need for honesty and that it is our imperfections that allow people to connect with us. While I am trying to implement this in general, I am wondering about the limits of this, or how to do it in a way that doesn't ruin my life. There are certain coping mechanisms that I developed that I am deeply ashamed about. The coping mechanisms/addictions as a whole I think I can eventually get to the point where I can let someone in and share. However the extent of it is what is bothering me - specific parts or actions in the course of the addiction that are so extreme that I can't share them with anyone. Since actually starting to deal with the abuse I no longer engage in these coping mechanism in general and especially not in the extreme parts, but just the fact that I have in the past is extremely shameful to me. To clarify, in these coping mechanisms I have never directly hurt anyone, but one did carry a large potential to, and the other involved me witnessing someone being hurt. For the second, I didn't have the power to stop it at the time and afterwards I tried to do what I could to ameliorate the situation - but the guilt I still feel is overwhelming. I am reasonable certain that if I shared these specific aspects of what I did, then the stigma around them is so strong that I would be immediately rejected by everyone. And whenever the toxic self image - the belief that I am a vile human being that is rotten at the core- is activated, my mind supplies me with these things as evidence of that fact. How can I heal, and view myself as an OK person, when I can't share these things and work through them with an external support system?

[@cameron481a]

Hi Heidi. I haven’t even watched this video yet, but since it’s the newest one I hoping you’d read this. I just want to thank you for what you’re doing. I’ve been struggling with understanding my difficulties with my romantic relationships and I’ve been watching your videos in chronological order. Your ability to explain these complex things is amazing! I’m only at the beginning of my healing journey but I no longer feel alone and am beginning to understand why I am the way I am. Thanks again and I’m so proud of you and proud to see your growth since you started.

[@anneonbi]

Wow! I hope you know how wonderful your videos are. I am SO grateful for your clarity and delivery. Please keep going!!! 27:25

[@YesStefinitely]

It took me two hours of rewatching and taking notes to understand this information, and it is solid gold. I can never thank you enough Heidi. You have taught me so much about myself and given me hope to continue on this journey.

[@steveengelbrcht8833]

Incredible work with incredible clarity. Thank you.

[@old-spirt]

Kinda wild how often Heidi shows up with a video that I definitely need to hear at just the right time. You address such important topics with great nuance and love ❤

[@carneades4409]

as an academic philosopher I am so hype to see Grice come up in a video 😆

[@AnnSinclair-jh4vj]

Another rich and dense video! Your videos don’t surprise me anymore, Heide!! But they and You continue to amaze me!! ❤️ Thanks so much!! Need to watch this again, right away!!

[@Introverted_Rn]

I feel like your videos teach me more and break down things in more concrete ways than my therapists have

[@karen0karen]

how is it that every single video of yours blows my mind?????

[@FruitsChinpoSamuraiG]

before, i wasnt very much convinced. but now ? im 100% sure you were listening in my conversations of this evening and knew exactly what to post 🤨

[@Ngatiatimothy]

"PurrticulAErly" Heidi Priebe.

[@theinsfrijonds]

Yep, gets me every time! LoL

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

I love this 😂🎉❤

[@kyliessave8454]

LOVE this 😆

[@mrstoner2udude799]

The Raven haired wizard did it again. I was obsessing over a lost relationship. Listening to this I just figured I need to ask other women out, instead of ruminating about "why". I can't live in the past.

[@My.Own.Flashlight]

❤🎉

[@chardvelasz1528]

Didn't think I'd encounter Grice's maxims out in the real world, it's cool to see them applied

[@alexisday7107]

I first want to extend my eternal gratefulness for the content that you make. I am 22 and have struggled all of my life with self sabotaging my relationships, and your videos have helped me in ways that I cannot begin to describe. You inspire me, and hardly anyone can do that, so your content is truly special to me. I often find myself second-guessing my ability to determine who is safe and unsafe in relationships. My experiences with my parents, particularly my mother’s hot-and-cold behavior and my father’s emotional unavailability, have skewed my perception of safety. I tend to either be drawn to people who are emotionally distant and invalidating or those who are overly clingy and potentially abusive. This makes it hard to trust my gut feelings about safety, as I worry that truly safe people might feel unsafe to me simply because they are unfamiliar. How can I distinguish between someone who is genuinely safe and someone who only appears safe because their behavior mirrors my past experiences? What strategies can I use to retrain my subconscious mind to recognize and trust truly safe individuals, especially when I often find myself drawn to unhealthy dynamics that feel secure due to their familiarity?

[@mrstoner2udude799]

Graces Maxims...been looking for this all day!

[@ayuminor]

Sorry to hone in on this random thing among the myriad of helpful concepts explained, but I love how you kept the summary bullet point counter in your right hand going throughout the whole trail mix tangent 😄

[@NYKIKE]

You are my favorite psych. I learn so much. I am very grateful for all of the videos. Thank you!!!!

[@alannguyen6505]

Deeply grateful for your providing an overview of Grice’s maxims and discourse analysis. Fascinating insights regarding AAI coding and so eloquently described for the lay person. Such in depth and high quality material regarding attachment theory is hard to come by these days. Thank-you so much :)!

[@cherry-xz6ei]

Wow I really needed to hear this. Thank you so much

[@jessiew4103]

Heidi! I'm loving your videos and super excited to see you gaining such a wide audience. We used to work together in University and I always thought you were a cool person. Thanks for all you are doing to help us!

[@msmr7283]

❤ thanks for help, Heidi. Your videos are treasure

[@cinderling5472]

I love you too Dearest Heidi! Thank you so much for your precious work ❤❤❤

[@robinlynn1980]

What can I say? You’re brilliant and you can deliver it to the beginner’s mind. Thank you

[@kaitlananderson9362]

I discovered an additional question that I need to ask myself after the "Is the problem answerable or unanswerable?" question. It goes like "Even if the question/problem is potentially answerable, is it really in my best interest to expend the time, energy, and stress that it would require to potentially answer it? Or should I just let it go?" Because sometimes giving my mind time to rest is what is really most important.

[@MarioRossi-sh4uk]

I'm watching Heidi's videos in the hope she says "ErGo" 😂 I'm kidding, but I love it.

[@hippetyhop8084]

What an insanely brilliant, well composed and valuable video again. Narrowing a very complex topic down to a clear explanation and making me totally invested not only in the topic but in your didactic decisions sets my heart (I'm a teacher) on fire. :D Thank you very much, Heidi, for all the effort you put into your videos. I send you warm hugs from Germany, take care! :)

[@phda7498]

Where is the fall from disgrace video? 😢 I got to watch half

[@MerrytimeForest]

Might be able to find it by going to your history of videos you watched

[@cindyaspden3982]

I watched your vid 5 tools for building healthy relationship with self. It was pivotal for me. NEEDEDAND LOVED!! Clear concise practical steps I could make for change. Andthank you for that!! This one I just heard you say, "don't use unnecessary complicated language" and to me, in my place of trauma recovery, this particular vid seems full of that. I'm not picking on you at all. I just find, and have said this to my counselor as well, spare me the new terms and keep it simple. I don't need to know the knew jargon and/or labels for old and forever existing behaviors and thought patterns. The jargon doesn't help me. In fact it just seems to complicate things. It's your sound, clear, applicable and doable suggestions of possible tangible changes I can make, that help. (PS. another that hasn't helped me is 'window of tolerance'). I guess just different strokes for different folks.

[@shelbytimbrook2095]

A video on having and maintaining hope while working through your shame would be helpful. It was devastating getting to a point where I was feeling happy only to realize that I can feel happy and like a worthless piece of shit who doesn't deserve to live at the same time.

[@kyliessave8454]

Another call out video for me, cheers!!

[@user-pe5wu1lw7t]

Ah totally relate to the trail mix quandary with an ex 😆 and the final question of do I already know the answer but don’t want to face it. Brilliant advice as always ❤

[@katyjean862]

I learned to THINK before speaking... Is the message: True Helpful Important Necessary & Kind? Similar to the 4 Maxims.... And on topic!

[@riarandomo]

Ok I'm 5 minutes in and as an autistic person with a lot of autistic friends, we do nooooot follow these 4 maxims haha I'm suddenly realising how people can immediately tell I'm autistic even when I'm masking.

[@petronelarts522]

I do love your content! At the same time this one comes to me as a bit too much over thinking... Looking forward to the next. Wishing you all the best❤

[@tylerwells4808]

@HeidiPriebe1 Great video as always! Almost finished, will definitely update this if it gets addressed - but my question/personal concern is this. Around the 18:14 mark, the idea of managing our own anxiety and what we can control makes total sense, and is definitely the ideal course of action... but unfortunately, in what is probably 100% overthinker fashion, my brain says, "Why not do both?" In terms of, manage my anxiety and emotional disregulation in the present, but why not ALSO, try and determine the best text that we can (in this hypothetical scenario) to ensure what is LIKELY the outcome closest to the one that is wanted (the partner 'loving them forever', in this example). What my brain does is say, "Yeah, sure, it's true that we can't achieve 100% certainty that our text will have that effect. But let's still aim to be 87% percent sure! Or 93% sure! I'll settle for *that*!" My brain can't seem to reconcile that while managing our disregulation around uncertainty is important, our text that we send is still going to have SOME amount of potential impact, so why not strive to make it the best text that we can, in terms of influencing the outcome that we hope for (as far as we can discern). Is it ALL just an illusion? Is it that ONCE we are regulated, we naturally LET GO of the perceived need/desire to SEND that perfect text? Thanks for all that you do Heidi!

[@tylerwells4808]

Update - Okay. I think I get it. So someone that's endlessly obsessed w/ achieving the highest level of probability/best outcome possible within our control, the underlying questions might be - "Why do I think I need to put in 100000% effort in everything I do, for this person to love me? What would it mean if they decided to leave me, and I was left realizing I could *potentially* have done more?" (Which is the case on both sides, in every relationship, I'd imagine) - Or, "What would it mean if they stayed with me, regardless of sending the perfect text, and what does that say about how I perceive my inherent nature"? Etc.? Hm...

[@Beltshazzar777]

I'm very depressed about thinking I'm so stupid and I'm an idiot. I realize now I do exactly what you're talking about I even promised myself when I go home tonight I'm going to escape into videos and fantasy as if I'm a woman instead of a man. I've done this most of my life but I have to keep it hush hush hush because I go to church regularly and I've been in church since I was little. I don't want to keep escaping into a fantasy world to be comforted can you please help me? I'm so glad I found your channel. I still I feel so far away from people. How do I find a reply from you

[@allisonwruck5696]

Heidi - can you do a video around the topic of beauty insecurity and what trauma that might stem from and how to overcome it? Ex. Bring in a room/setting in tv people we assess as being more beautiful than ourselves causing a feeling of not enough.

[@greengrer]

The story is not necessarily embarrassing, but it is very very relatable)

[@annan4866]

Thank you ❤ Another fantastic explanation to help improve our quality of life!

[@Bleseddd1]

can you make avideo on how to get her back and how to make her see your change in a month

[@SreeKrishna-ke2rf]

Thank you so much ! Such a helpful video❤️

[@CreativeImpulse]

Summary of questions from end of video - What to check in on if you find yourself overthinking and cannot stop: 1. Are you clear on exactly what question you are trying to use your thinking to answer? And is the surface question the same as the deeper, subconscious question? Getting clear on the surface + deeper question + "what solution you're looking for" is very helpful. 2. Is the answer that you're trying to arrive at answerable? Are you struggling with a great/small existential question with no answer? If you're fixated on a question that is unanswerable, can you instead turn your focus on how to cope with the anxiety around this unanswerable question? Better allocation of personal resources. 3. Are you dealing with a question that IS answerable, but don't have enough information to arrive at an educated answer? Go out to the world, seek relevant information that is reliable and true to help you. This means sometimes taking some action to attain more information, then thinking about it again. 4. (The hard pill to swallow) Do you already know the answer to this question, and you just don't want it to be true? Are you going in circles trying to make something that is false seem true because you don't like the actual truth? Be earnest, as this can help you arrive at the real answer and stop rumination. No longer valuing, wanting something, and jumping mental hoops to try and "make it true".

[@DianaDiana-dr6qv]

Thank you!!!

[@pegbuckner5074]

Perfect content. Perfect timing. Thank you so much! ❤

[@davontaej]

That last point is tough. I don't know how quite yet, but it resonates too much.

[@asentientgoose]

Heidi sweet dove of the masses (research-pilled somatic queen) I beg can you pls make a video on how to assert/stand up for yourself healthily? I want to be able to stick up for myself without casting judgement or becoming closed off, even when the other person is being judgemental/making false assumptions.

[@kmcq692]

Thanks for this super-relevant video for my MOMENT!

[@vazzaroth]

The trailmix story is such a George Costanza situation

[@MarioRossi-sh4uk]

Thank u Heidi for these videos 🙂👍

[@lunarcappy]

Good stuff thank you ❤

[@BettYen-h1o]

Omg the Taylor Swift line got me haha 😭😭😂😂🤣🤣

[@thisisnotrobi]

My friends and are loving this. Sending infp love.

[@theinsfrijonds]

I just went grocery shopping today! How did Heidi know that I bought trail mix? I got Simply Classic with peanuts, raisins, M&Ms, almonds, and cashews. But also Cranberry Cashew, which includes cranberries, cashews, almonds, and golden raisins. Actually, I might just be overthinking all of this. How could she know that I went grocery shopping?

[@alisiademi]

Some awesome helpful info. You are so appreciated!!!! ❤

[@twilfits]

Thanks!

[@dseer13]

The overthinking is your mind focusing on things you do not know this is driven by shame of the vulnerability of not knowing (how someone truly feels, if you are about to be abandoned etc.) and applying yourself in a way that might bring about a bad experience. Its a defense mechanism.

[@avirginia8808]

Thank you

[@freedomtownn]

Thanks. Love this. ❤

[@SinoxoloNhonkieGibson]

Thanks babes 🤍

[@grealish2234]

thanks you m=si much for the video,.i watched it 4x times and made notes

[@GaymerXL]

Your videos have helped me so much.

[@nlsn243]

But I always tell people about my gym routine when they ask about the bus schedule. Heidi, is this why i cant make any friends??? 😢

[@olgab.5288]

Новое видео Хайди,ура!

[@supriyas7081]

Please share the tool to deal with anxieties as you mentioned.

[@MarioRossi-sh4uk]

Last but not least. Don't overthink too much about overthinking.

[@BaritoneMonkey]

While I know you were joking, FYI saying things like can actually generate shame for people that deal with this sort of thing.

[@victormoreno803]

Thank you so much