his stoopid ideas

mark gungor

[@jojoGjoy]

ohh yess "most affairs do not start for sexual reasons but for emotional ones " that's a 100% TRUE saying !!

[@Jeff55369]

This is very true. There's a movie called, "the kings speech" where the main character suffers through a trial many of us don't have to deal with. Throughout the entire movie his wife is a champion for him, building him up when the world wants to tear him down. I find that concept heart warming and something I seldom see in this world.

[@catever68]

Yes he is stoopid !

[@alohagirl808]

"Let that boy know you believe in him"...

[@jefflanduyt6750]

NAILED IT!!! My wife wonders why I don't talk to her at all anymore. Because she's beat me down with this very reason over the last 30+ years.

[@addyrule1520]

His dissapointed me so much cheated on me and put everyone else before me. The last thing I wanted to do was support him. It works both ways.

[@Germatti13489]

Wow that is what my husband does to me! He will tell me I cannot do something or it will not work out. Even when I show him I can do it and succeed there is no pat on the back or an apology for his denigration. Huge damage to me. I have learned also that if I share anything with him that he may use that against me later on. Is sad when you cannot even share a small daydream without him getting angry about it. I really don't understand it but it's happened for 30 years. One time we were having a wonderful time dancing in the living room when the kids were asleep and I mention that can't wait for the day to have a fully fenced-in backyard for the children. He exploded. I was shocked. To soothe myself, I kept saying what will it matter in 5 years. Unfortunately it was more than one time. Once at shoney's with our newborn and toddler and I was trying to flirt with him. Alone all day with 2 children. I went to the salad bar then suddenly he yelled out "F" you. I was badly shakened/upset but had no way to leave. So I sat in humiliation. To this day I do not know why he would sabotage our relationship. When he attended school for his degree, I backed him, typed his papers for him, mowed the grass, took out the trash, took care of the house and children plus I'm the handy woman and gardener of the house. when he says you don't look at me during anymore I always say to him if you could refill that well then I can be that way again. Unfortunately he's a pessimist and I'm an optimist. So after again not receiving any special days including this Christmas (he promised but again didn't follow through). No adoration for me, nothing special, not even a cheap gift in exchange for the expensive driver I got him. When I went to discuss my feelings of wanting to spend time with him and why he didn't do the free gifts for me for Christmas he was saying it was my problem. Gosh I didn't even get to celebrate our 25th silver! I have tried to keep the faith through loneliness, lack of emotional and physical support but the snoring, his words that I am bitter and complaining have finally beat this 60 yr old woman down. And Yes, I am bitter and complaining. Apparently he didn't remember the next day. So it is with regret but excitement that I will create my own "she room" bedroom for me. Begin trying to stay out in the evenings volunteering and see if he misses me when he comes home from the bar. This will start the first day of the rest of my new life. I'll let you know if that wake-up call helped. I should have done it when our children were small.

[@juliefroman6189]

your man is narcissist. sorry cant spell it.

[@nooneyouknow5002]

It happens to many women all over the world. Don't let him control your life. Create a sanctuary in your mind as a getaway

[@intexclouds9607]

Ma'am, I used to do this to my wife too...I am (now, was) just like your husband and I can totally relate to the shouting suddenly while dancing and cursing abusively....my wife was just like you and she felt exactly the way you said....but the sad truth is, your husband IS feeling that you are the one who is damaging him ( I know I felt the same way). He is thinking that he is tolerating you as if he were a Hindu saint....he isn't going to feel bad one bit even if you ignore him....... However, all of this will change ( coz, I have changed) if you can just befriend him anyway you can ( praise his problem solving skills, boost his ego ) and * MAKE HIM WATCH THIS MAN'S TALKS *.... He will change like magic..... present these talks to him as if it were some kind of talk that you are "unable to understand".....feign ignorance if you have to ( for a man, nothing compares to getting complimented for his problem solving skills or his physical brawn.....not even sex can come before it)..... Just get him to watch either this man's videos or John Gray's men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Long story short, my wife really admires me and more importantly I have the raised ego and satisfaction of finally decoding women ( my intellectual superiority ego has been boosted and satisfied).... I am happy coz I "solved" the problem and have great sex and she's happy coz she knows that I now will listen to her all day long with out speaking a word or interrupting her and will always love her unconditionally and empathize with her in her difficult times. I pray all the gods that you couple may rekindle your love for each other and find bliss. Good luck from India. P.s: I used to look at other women when I was feeling bad and used to covet them but now, I am a changed man. Your husband will change too.

[@artflyer8775]

@@intexclouds9607 yeah my husband is the same, he flies off the handle at the most innocent things, he's been doing that since the week before we were married, and I feel like a nervous wreck. I can't say anything to him or he blows up, I don't know what to do, I feel broken

[@artflyer8775]

@@intexclouds9607 it's like I'm constantly treading on eggshells

[@jangambardelli7207]

I ‘be been enjoying your videos........lots of good bible based advice with a wonderful sense of humor........I wasn’t fortunate in marriage.....too much pain and sorrow. My sister just lost her husband after 60+ years ...........”a oneness between them that when one weeps the other will taste salt”

[@LOVELYDEZIRE]

I am so happy I watched this. He is absolutley right. Not only did he teach me something new, it also helped me realize My Hubby is the Best. And i Am a HAteful mean bitch. Thank you so much! I loved it.

[@heyitsthatguy4517]

so, whats the status on that. Still a mean bitch 10 years later???

[@memphisakan4691]

🤦

[@Samikayr]

For those ppl that made negative comments, you need to watch the entire dvd. This is a very small part of a whole cloth and can be misunderstood if taken out of context. Paster Gungor is wonderfully funny but very real about the topics he discusses. Have a blessed day.

[@TeddGCM]

I know this guy is a preacher and I'm an atheist, but he is funny as all get out!

[@nathanredmon96]

Thanks for letting us know you're an atheist. Anything else irrelevant you want to tell us?

[@LaYla-yr8kq]

Nathan Redmon exactly!

[@nurasava]

+Nathan Redmon Us? Who is "us"? Does that include me or am I also irrelevant in "our" conception of what is and what is not relevant?

[@nathanredmon96]

"Us" is an object pronoun, used to describe who is included in a statement. "Us", in this case, would include everyone leaving comments, who don't need irrelevant information that isn't pertinent to the video. It would be like me randomly commenting "I have a swimming pool" or "I like cats". It has nothing to do with this video, therefore it would be irrelevant to you and the others on this page. Then you could use the word "us" and say "anything else irrelevant you want to share with US"?

[@nurasava]

Nathan Redmon Hehe, nice explanation, thx. Sorry if I was a bit "silly". Its just that I think its ok when somebody adds whatever he wants (with a limit). And your answer to him was a bit rude I think. And as long as you said: "Thx for letting US know... irrelevant" I considered myself included and wanted to state that I am ok with him giving the info he wants. Salute.

[@Klaudili]

This is so fantastic, just as the other clips I got so see here. He is speaking the truth and he is speaking it from both sides. Besides saying that we need to believe in him and encourage his ideas he also said, that it does not mean, we can not let our husband know, when an idea of him is not good, because it may get him in trouble (endangers his life, gets him into debt, etc)

[@sarabjarnveig87]

I agree with him on some level.. but the man also has to have great believe in his wife too. he also has to be hers no.1 fan.. I mean if it weren't for my bf believing in me and his support i would not be going now to university..

[@lovemetalhatejuggalo]

ive watched a bunch from this guy...hes not the funniest dude ever but i think it hits home how accurate it all is...hes very good at seeing both sides

[@nickdipaolofan5948]

I hate how he just brushed pass the sex thing as if it is a side issue. If you are not giving your man regular sex, than anything else you do for him will not matter. It would be nice to have a wife that compliments you and supports your ideas, but if you are not having sex with him regularly, he will either cheat on you are resent you. Sex is a requirement in a relationship, not a bonus.

[@YassirNassif]

this actually works with parenting boys as well even when the boy has a family of his own

[@nickdipaolofan5948]

This is so true. Women who have super successful husbands absolutely resent it! They hate being in the shadows of their man and will try to emotionally tear them down at every turn.

[@saraf5414]

*resent

[@mingions4089]

you would be more successful if you could spell.

[@framboise595]

@ Nick DiapoloFan Isn't the church in the shadows of Christ ? How could a Christian woman resent being in the shadows of her husband then ? A church like the Catholic church drifted apart and did not stay in the shadows of Christ. It became the worst oppressor in Europe. By the way , it is too bad that you never answer me dear brother.

[@adityaprasetiyo6590]

very true...

[@leedialili]

What about the opposit way.. What if the man tells his woman "thats stupid,or ..you can never make this ...etc." wont that ruin there relationship too? ..and she may never share her littel dreams with him..shouldnt he be her fan too ?.. Mr.Mark Gungor ..i wish u put a spot light on that too ..

[@nickdipaolofan5948]

people address this all the time. frankly, I was surprised Mark even went here and told women they need to not be cunts to their husband about his ideas.

[@bad0or]

amazing how people grow up while they r kids in the inside & so emotional..

[@artflyer8775]

It's like as soon as I got married I suddenly become to dumb to think for myself

[@BlessingEmmanuelitsallnom]

i love him!!

[@framboise595]

When God saw that man was alone , he said "it is not good for man to be alone , I will make a HELPER suitable for him ". How can a woman help and support her husband if she debases his ideas and projects ? A wife 's job is to support her husband and reveal the hero out of him.

[@qa1981]

its very good idea and most people dose not know this for real thanks so match

[@Luck_x_Luck]

I totally get where that´s coming from lol, I was once going to have a snowboard race on a half black half red slope with a friend of mine, even tho i still kinda sucked at it and fell a lot (and hard). I myself thought it was going to be totally awesome and when I told her, she responded like i shouldn't do that because it was supposed to be "too dangerous". I can as a man say we don't care one bit if we get hurt doing something awesome, so just tell us it's cool what we are going to do...

[@dnt9217]

@sameer137 I get what he is saying. I encourage my brothers to follow their dreams, but the stuff they do confuses me. I never realized how much damage I was doing to them by continually calling them "stupid."

[@Toavatar]

that's because women express those feelings way more often than men. like he said: "we may look tough on the outside" I'm a guy. I call true on this one.. and a big ego isn't exactly the opposite of being humble.

[@hothothotsummer]

Ok I love the whole thing i do everything right. I NEED the same show for men about understanding women. Cause I like to be appreciated too and i don't like my dreams been crushed too.

[@viperstrike2010]

This is why I never tell my GF no or put down her idea's. I point out any pitfalls set backs and tough hurdles to her ideas and how to get around those challenges.

[@viperstrike2010]

This is why I never tell my GF no or put down her idea's. I point out any pitfalls set backs and tough hurdles to her ideas and how to get around those challenges.

[@Dragon_Lair]

That’s the thing, he DOES also tell guys how to help women. This is a very small part of a much longer seminar called “Laugh your way to a better marriage”.

[@tgbotg]

@flyingfoxNZ .. these aren't religious tenets. just helping couples, any couple, with their relationships.

[@ChereBecker]

works both ways!!

[@freechild1566]

Amen! Greatly appreciated 🙏#1

[@blifx]

way ahead of you. watched my mom destroy my dad my whole life

[@krishnanandabasumatary7144]

Sorry to hear that..

[@Catholic-Redpilled-Spaniard]

Tough luck, man. Good luck

[@jimh6813]

Wife says "I want to have five kids and raise a big family and keep a nice house." Husband says, "oh how ridiculous, you can't possibly do that." See ladies, same thing as when you frown and ridicule on his hopes and dreams.

[@TheLivirus]

@Jeff55369 Yeah. The media is portraying the roles the other way around. Where the male is confident and independent and the female is weak and fragile and who's confidence relies on what her man think of her. In my oppinion the reality is floating somewhere in between. Relationships are very different from case to case and can not be generalized like this.

[@crespossss]

oh shit...i found this guy too late..lol

[@Toavatar]

i believe that men's ego is indeed more fragile than people often tend to think yes. I am not sure about women's ego, but i don't think that women are much more fragile than men on that point just because boys, as you said, are raised with a "stop crying and be a man" attitude.

[@keldfc]

I hEARDDDD a woman, after Gungor said "his stupid ideas" say OH YES ;)

[@artflyer8775]

Yeah but what happens when it's the other way around?

[@Toavatar]

yea true. i agree on all this.. and ofc it's a matter of generalizing whether it applies to people or not. I'm not sure about womens egos at all, but i'm just sayin, and i think he too is trying to say, that men's ego indeed IS relatively fragile in contrary to popular belief regardless of women's ego. but you can still be humble and have a fragile ego too.

[@Mixinnitup]

What , to you, constitutes a fragile ego? what is an example of a man demonstrating a fragile ego?

[@357MagnumBob]

@BlackTrainXIII Ya think? Do you suppose that JUST MAYBE it was intentional to underscore the point?

[@joyjumaya1]

well said!

[@SuperCosmochick]

@jojoGjoy He does make a good point on that.

[@ToThoseWhoVanished]

Not all men are babies..like you described them here. Some are stone made n some are only looking for a motherly figure

[@Morna777]

If your husband has so much ego that he is hurtful to you, then you need to see a marriage counselor, either with him, or by yourself if he won't go.

[@artflyer8775]

I know the feeling

[@flyingfoxNZ]

Why should this only apply to men? Shouldn't a man believe in their wife too...?

[@tough88]

yes, but I think he's mentioning this to women because women tend to do more of the insulting than men do. He says in another clip that you insult a woman to get her to do something ... and it doesn't work the other way.

[@LillianKattelmann]

Maybe he just does not have dream.

[@nurasava]

+Lillian Kattelmann If her kiss, a real tender kiss doesnt make him dream he probably is prisioner of his empty box or you just dont have the key...

[@nickdipaolofan5948]

@@nurasava hahaha, you think womens lips are magic or something? no, a womans ACTIONS are what make a man stay in love with her.

[@nurasava]

@@nickdipaolofan5948 I dont think that "womens lips are magic"... I am SURE about that. I am not talking just about sex, i mean "affection, care"

[@scottosborne3640]

Third part; previous was 2nd or 1st

[@mariomanningfan]

@fouzia66 he didn't say that. He just said don't tell your husband he's stupid.

[@ROSASCOLARO]

no está subtitutlada esta parte?

[@Mixinnitup]

What is ego? when you get right down to it in this context it's how you see yourself. The fragile male ego thing comes from this idea that men have a huge built image of themselves that is easily broken down. What I'm saying is that while it may apply to some guys, it is not a rule that can apply to all or even exclusively males. there are just as many women with huge fragile egos as there are men. so I still don't see why it's called "the male ego"

[@angeliquenomade4353]

Big ! !!

[@johedward]

@leedialili he is talking about the general! he cant talk about everything case possible!! is good but is not superman to do it in chuch a small period of time!!

[@dnt9217]

@alohagirl808 Guys have enormous egos, and that is frustrating. Believing in the men in my life is very difficult, especially when the male has "an ego the size of Texas" because I do not want to expand that ego to fill Russia!

[@sameer137]

@dnt9217 : You missed the entire point of the video. Sad..

[@Calixtus]

@littlegiant1972 If there are grounds to assert the "100% right" of this, then it must be said that it does not apply to all men, for I have no trouble accepting judgements however critical, from whatever source, to any of my ideas, not because I am absolutely convince in the quality of my ideas, of which I so happen am, but that I alone know best, indistinct and without reserving the need for the judgement or justification of others.

[@ilOsirhC]

Funny how he gets all serious when he starts talking about MEN'S hurt feelings. It's a big laugh when he talks about women's.

[@lorisullivan327]

ilOsirhC you have to see the other videos / he uses humor for both men and women to make the medicine (or lesson) go down a little easier - he teases both sides about the same

[@ProperJudgment]

You need to see the whole seminar, he does everything for both. Theres a reason hes heen married for 40+ years... Unfortunately his wife passed away from cancer. But hes married again so

[@Toavatar]

That's the problem. again it is something rather invisible on the outside since men often keep it all inside. but when it does come out, it's by breaking down, having a depression or even commit suicide which men do much more than women.

[@TheHenok30]

This is coming from a gay guy. So how do we tell the guy his idea isn't a good course of action w/o hurting his feelings? I can't act like the guy has a good idea, etc when I know of the negative consequences.

[@TheHenok30]

HipsterAnimeLover2000 - I'm not attracted to females. I'm not bisexual. Don't ever tell me to man up in this context & not be myself. It's very offensive. I can only be myself. God made us sexual creatures so it's just natural for homosexuals to want to be in a relationship like heterosexuals. Otherwise I could choose to be celibate. I don't see much need in that except for studying. You heterosexuals have no right to tell or teach us to remain celibate our whole life when you all overwhelmingly don't choose that for yourselves.

[@AnonyMous-og3ct]

It's a most delicate balancing act and difficult to suggest anything without a concrete example. That said, keep in mind what was said about fidelity. If you're dealing with a person who has a vested passion in pursuing a goal and you're the primary nay-sayer, even if you're the only one talking sense, you'll most likely only get a rebel who doesn't want to share things with you anymore. Just imagine the rebel child who wants to be a rock star while his parents constantly tell him he has no chance. That person might be guaranteed to fail as a rock star but having condescending parents will also make those parents lose their intimate relationship with their child.

[@vanessagraciano6188]

I like to lightly praise my husband for being creative with his thought process and just curiously bring up things he may not have thought out thoroughly about and confirm with another small praise. Whether I'm right or wrong I don't really know but it's better than being the bad guy that just points out a bunch of flaws. For example: Oh that's a good idea babe, I see why you want to do that. I'm just wondering, do you think (person) would be okay with that? You know how they feel about this/you know a, b, c could happen. If you're okay with it then that's cool but if that would bother you maybe there's a way to still do it without those consequences or maybe we can save this for another time. I really like how you came up with that though.

[@dorisharrer4857]

God made it to be between a man and a wife. God can turn your life around. It looks difficult, till you fall inlove with Jesus. You will do anything to show how grateful you're for his love.

[@SpriteoftheDnieper]

If you think the negative consequences are XYZ but he's trying to solve (or it's a good idea) because of ABC... "Wow, that's a great way to solve ABC! ...praise... How do you plan on mitigating the risks of XYZ?" Or something like that, there are no details in your question. Basically, praise for the idea and don't assume he hasn't figured out a solution to the reasons you think it'd be a bad idea. Phrasing it this way shows you are both giving support, but also frames your objections as being supportive and gives you both the chance to make the idea genuinely better: maybe he hasn't thought of them and he can now better prepare or adapt his plan, or maybe he already has a plan to deal with them in mind. Either way, approach it respectfully and as a team :)

[@pattyjm59]

@BlackTrainXIII um I think it is supposed to be.

[@iraqianbloodian]

hahahahahaha

[@lafan2003]

@BlackTrainXIII Yes, I do

[@KENTandNICOLE]

@BlackTrainXIII it was intentional

[@BronSoloSV]

how would you know? (not trying to sound rude)

[@krishnanandabasumatary7144]

What?

[@flyingfoxNZ]

Hmmmpf. Don't think I'll subscribe to this religion then :oP~

[@ARENKHA1]

ESTE VIDEO NO TIENE SUBTITULOS...!!!!!!! =S

[@Mixinnitup]

And btw, societal expectations are the reason why it seems women are better at expressing themselves. it's gender constraints really. Think about it, you raise young boys to, when they fall down, get up, stop crying and be happy. Conversely young women are raised to be petted and attended to and that she can let it out. The implication of this? young men are raised to believe their problems are insignificant and that they should show that their feelings have been hurt. (cont.)

[@charlenel5107]

I too thought that boys and girls were the same, but raised differently. But I learned differently when my son was about 1 yr. old. Boys and girls are different

[@peavelSD]

@leedialili i think what he said was just an example, using the "man model". he's generally exaggerating for better understanding.

[@jankerle58]

Oh, people, you are sooo def. I should stop reading peoples coments....

[@Mixinnitup]

What's with this "fragile male ego" thing? First off, most people are actually pretty humble about themselves. Far as I've seen, the male ego is no more fragile than the female's (not to be sexist, but I've seen bigger reactions from women in this area than men)

[@claraandriessen8423]

Very nice, except for using 'Girly' as an insult when describing mens fragile ego's.

[@framboise595]

So , God has fragile ego too ??? God wants things to be done his way because he rules. Men want things to be done their way because they rule as well. Man is the glory of God ( 1 Corinthians 11) . How can a so called man of God mock men this way ? When you mock the masculine , you mock the Lord because man and God resemble each other in many ways.

[@framboise595]

@Sheila Sure How to make any marriage work ? Very easy. Just practice what the BIBLE says. Something that Mr Gungor does not do .

[@artflyer8775]

@@framboise595 I don't think you really understand the Bible

[@Calixtus]

@MammaMea8 Women are no less fragile than men, are you not of that opinion? After all, what makes a man called a man is none other than his unbending strength of character and his resolution against opposition. Women break more easily, but of course, they are not without their strengths.

[@A.van_wyk]

Jesus loves you

[@framboise595]

0:42 Unbiblical teaching on conditional marital sex . Sex is no bonus ! It is what a spouse OWES the other spouse.

[@AlmaSdance]

+Isabelle M You're everywhere! what's your purpose ? shame him! you've mistaken the epoch lady. if you had just been born 5 hundred years earlier everything would be fine with your kind of teaching.

[@framboise595]

Alma Shatri The BIBLE will judge this ungodly and rebellious world. This teaching is not my teaching but GOD's teaching. But rebellious females rather listen to quacks like this man instead of the Lord because they are his best enemies. Why do you listen to a man who does not preach the truth if you are a Christian ? Epochs don't matter in God's eyes. His words remains and never changes. To make marriage steady you need steady sex. You cannot have steady sex if sex is not an obligation . This man does not teach what 1 Corinthians 7 v 5 says at all. He teaches conditional sex , which is pathway to hideous blackmail and rejection whereas GOD teaches UNconditional sex .

[@AlmaSdance]

Haha! this is so idiotically funny! i do not need to bother arguing over any of your points. Incredible! Haha!

[@framboise595]

Alma Shatri You hate the Lord , don't you ? Be honest. Why are you on a so called Christian thread if you mock the Lord and His word ?

[@AlmaSdance]

+Isabelle M I don't like what you write dear or better the way you write it. why do you even try?! you seem like you have managed to figure out Lord perfectly and are suggesting that others are astray. Your figuring out of Lord and what he guides us to do for our benefit in this life is so defective to my intelligence. And I am not a Christian. In my prayers I call Lord Allah

[@Mixinnitup]

Devoid of the constraints society places on gender...men and women aren't actually all that different. That's all I'm saying.