How To Be Very Attractive

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“The goal can be stated simply enough: the overwhelming priority, when on a date with someone we like, is to persuade them to like us back. But the simplicity of the mission masks the complexity required to achieve it. Typically, the advice focuses on externals: what to wear, when to unfurl a napkin, what to order… But such counsel, however well-meaning, is at odds with what we ourselves know about attraction: that it is profoundly focused on psychology.”

[@youngeuncho6347]

So basically you can be genuine and honest to be attractive, not pretentious or trying to be someone else.

[@Hello.Meditate]

I must be super attractive then...i'm super aware of my crazy and don't hide it haha I do give fair warning

[@htetaung04]

No. That’s not the gist. The gist is know your imperfections and be honest about them.

[@joeleek9976]

Lol. This has not been my experience. I am crazy self-aware and fairly open. I have had almost zero success with women.

[@dibelgelo]

​@@joeleek9976Cheap, broke, stingy? Self awareness is essential but not enough!

[@dstarr8222]

@@joeleek9976Same 🫤

[@MarioGreco]

Just a reminder that being “self-aware” doesn’t mean vocally putting yourself down and assuming you can’t improve nor be helped.

[@АндрейКвасов]

Well that’s the hardest part. Not playing victim but being sympathetic to own insecurities. If that is my normal attitude to myself, than other people can mirror calm and positive attitude to me since I show them this example. But once there is any issue, any struggle - it becomes a matter of surviving to not expose myself to the part of opening up. Unfortunately I am not good at either approaches, so I just feel lonely and isolated.

[@MarioGreco]

@@АндрейКвасов “I’m such a weirdo, I don’t know when to stop talking, I’m so annoying” bad. “I struggle with anxiety, I hope to find a sense of peace soon.” Good. It’s how you frame it. If people act like dicks at your most vulnerable moments then they’re not worth your time. Be with those who appreciate and love you.

[@Varenyam86]

Yes, absolute truth! Owning it without criticizing yourself. Thanks for the reminder!

[@tapdancinmutant]

Yes! Self-aware vs self-conscious, I think it can be a tricky transition but an important one to make

[@aellalee4767]

​@@MarioGrecoI agree. I don't like the example they gave. Yours is better. Also, confidence (not cocky about being less good at certain things) is important because if you speak about it like you have a disease, they'll treat you like you have something bad and leave.

[@Purriah]

True. People who are self aware can clearly and immediately see who is and isn’t also self aware, and nobody likes someone who isn’t self aware.

[@somethingbambi875]

Yes, this happened to me, I opened up and was very clear I understand I seem a bit weird and crazy, and they took it as a gift to just blame me and couldn't see their own behaviours. Glad to be Free at least, sad, I really liked them at first, but no self-awerness to be found.

[@quickgirl80]

I know plenty of people that dislike self aware people, but that’s simply because they aren’t good people & want someone they can manipulate & control.

[@RedPilledAsFuck]

the majority of people aren’t self aware. and plenty of people like them.

[@kioumim]

That indeed is true! Maybe this is why i often time am good at discerning people's intentions, if they are good or not and simply what type of people they are in the first interaction with them..of course i do not let the first impression lead the way i interact with people, because that would be a big mistake on my part but i do keep it in mind.

[@aazhie]

Eh. I try to be aware that others have different motives than I do, so I tend to give others more of a pass if they might be having a bad day. So I tend to get a bit more burned even if I may keep them a little farther than a more trusted person. I think I'm pretty self aware. I don't do it entirely out of nice-ness. I also want others to be fair minded of me when I'm cranky or uncharacteristically rude.

[@bokehintheussr5033]

This reminds me of an experience I had when I was 17. I was at a house party and had been eyeing up this really gorgeous girl all evening. Eventually she approached me and we started awkwardly chatting. I cant remember details of the conversation, but after a few minutes she said "youre a bit weird arent you" I replied "yes of course" and she said "youre not supposed to agree with me" and walked away. That was almost 20 years ago. When I was younger it was a mortifying thing to remember. One of those memories of interpersonal interaction that make you cringe when you remember it. Now Im 35 and I'm proud of how I dealt with that situation. Fuck her. If people make you feel you have to be someone other than the person you are, theyre not worth your time.

[@mllwbby]

Sounds to me like you dodged a bullet.

[@kingagrad3436]

Trueee!

[@ntwaha732]

I love this!! Good on you! 😊

[@creativechristiancontent]

Yeah but you were only weird according to her. What if her perception of your weirdness is actually awesome to you and others like you.

[@60minutesofenglishreadspea44]

My grain of sand to your story and, more generally, to the opinions expressed in the clip: I'm not sure everyone reacts in the same way when someone else shares with them their "craziness/vulnerabilities". From my experience, there were those who felt directly threatened, while others were genuinely surprised, and some were even concerned and a bit cautious. I don't think I ever met anyone who was pleased or amused by it😅. Obviously it also depends on the degree or kind of craziness we have and decide to share..😊

[@MsSwankie10]

I LITERALLY was hella moody when I went out on a date with this guy yesterday and I told him I can't explain why I'm so thrown off but I'm sorry I'm being so moody and I kept mentioning it all throughout our date and he literally replied telling me that the fact that I have so much self awareness is what's important because if I wasn't aware of it, that's when it would be a problem 💕. This just feels like divine confirmation.

[@Morale_Booster]

Hell yeah 🖤 honesty is very sexy

[@sxwrtr918]

Did he ever call you again? Hope so.

[@Rflowers321]

Google listening in on your date 👀

[@Pearlz2327]

So you finally found your match..congrats

[@Masha.S.]

You know, it could also be a reaction you had to this guy. The fact that your body and mind is feeling out of place/irritated when you're around him, could be your intuition trying to tell you something about him. And It's important to pay attention what signs your body is sending you, especially when you're on a date. 💕

[@hanac5586]

I think this makes sense. I'm not pretty nor socially gifted, but I have always had people around me who genuinely like me...by being kind and unapologetically myself.

[@yesyesyesyesyesyes2021]

Be yourself apologetically 🤬🤬🤬

[@thedashey]

​@@yesyesyesyesyesyes2021 Why?

[@debs9785]

The right person won't need to work hard to like you, just like you won't need to work hard to like them. We should not change who we are to attract someone because those meant to love us will love us for who we are. Living authentically and true to who you are will make you attract people who value the real you. In the same way, we must observe the people around us with respect and attention to love them as they are, and not from the perspective of what we want them to be.

[@TheGreatWasian_]

What if both people like each other a lot but there is a problem that needs to be worked on for example someone being closed off or not being able to communicate their feelings clearly? Is it foolish to try to fix it together, or should they be left alone to fix it themselves?

[@julsstay74]

​@@TheGreatWasian_ I'm no expert on the matter, so I'm just sharing my thought on this. I think it first starts by asking some questions (rather to oneself, or to the other person, depending on the goal). 1) Is the person aware they're being closed off and unable to communicate their feelings? Do they wanna work on it? 2) If the person is unaware, did you tackle the subject? What was their reaction? Open or closed to acknowledgment? Based on that, I'd say: if the person is aware and has expressed a will to work on it, showing support and wilingness to go through that process with them can go a long way. All while giving them some space when they need it. And yeah, this might be tricky, as they're specifically unable to communicate their feelings.. ^^" I think it could help if, when noticing signs of discomfort, you express something like "I see/feel you're uncomfortable.. Do you want me to leave you alone for a while?" It could be the first step for them toward expressing their feelings. And, if they're unable to request being left alone, maybe say something like: "I see you're uneasy. Maybe you want time alone, but find it hard to tell me..? If so, it's ok. I'll be in the kitchen, ok? You can come find me whenever you want, be it in 2 seconds or 2 hours. Love you." - allowing them alone time on their own terms, all while still being supportive and showing you care. Showing that you respect their boundaries can be a step towards being able to communicate feelings that can be hard to put into words. Of course, self-reflection is important. And if the person expresses that they prefer to go through this alone, it's important that you respect their request, all while making sure they know you're there if they ever need you: being a crutch they can lean on, not an escalator. If that makes sense.. ^^" If the person is unaware and/or unwilling to work on themselves, there's nothing much more you can do.. beside showing over and over again that being honest and vulnerable around you is safe. I'm saying this, because, how I see it, is that someone won't express their feelings now because expressing their feelings in the past has lead to bad consequences. Staying distant and silent was the "safest" option, so the nervous system has to adapt to a new reality, with time and consistence. Another reason might be that they themselves have a hard time identifying and understanding their emotions. This is called "alexithymia", if you wanna look it up. All this being said, I hope all goes well for you both in the long term! It's also important that you stay aware of how this situation and dynamic affects you personally. It's important that you respect your own boundaries as well. Be a support, not a pillar. I wish you all the best!

[@TheGreatWasian_]

@@julsstay74 that advice seems so incredibly relevant and specific to my scenario. Almost like it’s God-sent. Seriously, thank you so much. I’m going to read this over and over a few times and make sure I can internalize this so I can properly be there for this girl in the way that she needs me to. Thank you.

[@TheGreatWasian_]

@@julsstay74 it seems like you have gone through something similar. It does seem like a good idea to give her space when she needs it and to be able to pinpoint space whenever it seems like she needs it. My issue is that if I saw something was wrong I would try to ask her directly what is wrong and she just wouldn’t tell me and it would cause a lot of stress on both ends.

[@spring7643]

This should be top comment

[@mirjamk.8843]

if everyone is crazy nobody is. there is a difference between being self-aware and self deprecating

[@currentlynoname7499]

Everyone is crazy but in different ways. Crazy is an umbrella term and covers a wide range so yes everyone can be uniquely crazy. It's like saying everyone is hungry so no one is hungry. Sounds good but everyone really is hungry, just at different times.

[@mirjamk.8843]

@@currentlynoname7499 still doesn't make sense to say sorry then for being crazy/hungry

[@alexeyp83]

What this is ommiting is that the other person might still be under the illusion that perfection exists, and run away when they hear about flaws. Personally I've interpreted this as "they are on their journey, but are not just yet ready for a real relationship". Be prepraed to meet people who don't find self awareness that attractive, but when you do, don't dismiss the advice in this video is bad.

[@MadTracker]

It sounds like a great way to weed out superficial idealists

[@lollysmolly13]

Your imperfections are what make you perfect for me

[@MaryDunford]

I know what you mean. 🥰

[@Morale_Booster]

This is true. After disappointing someone by cancelling plans with them (because I put my needs first even if it makes people dislike me. I apologized and rescheduled and made a joke about it) I was later told by them that it was mature and sexy.

[@DanniBby]

What was the joke? Lol

[@Morale_Booster]

@@DanniBby I said something like "don't be mad at me papa" in a flirty way

[@Kiki-vr8gk]

@@Morale_Booster that is funny

[@Adamcito.]

username checks out

[@joefunk76]

Just because it is better to be self-aware than not doesn’t mean that quality will make someone “very attractive.”

[@cattwalker]

"Has nothing to do with looks." -Said no man ever. 😂

[@greenbanana1001]

Exactly

[@JewishPeacock]

Looks get a man on a date. But this is how to keep them

[@inasiman26yearsago56]

Women beat themselves of for looks, not men. Men dont even look so detailed at your looks, its yourself.

[@aerah76]

Yeah women are saints who don't go for looks or bank balance right? 🤣

[@vyassathya]

or every woman on a dating app

[@--RBuo84]

Lol this is exactly how my ex manipulated me. I did not like him, but I liked his honesty and awareness of himself saying "Sorry I am so needy and jealous." Well yeah, turned out to be a narcissistic control freak and pathological liar with a heart made from stone. He also enjoys abusing others. He is self aware. But he doesn't care.

[@sighthoundlady15]

All the normal rules don’t apply when dealing with a narcissist. By their nature they stomp on boundaries, and flip the social contract on its head. It doesn’t matter how genuine and authentic you are, the narcissist is not meeting you in a genuine or authentic way. They’re in a competition with you, in a game you didn’t even know you were playing in the first place. Any “weakness” you share with them, will be tucked away to be used against you at a later time. They’re playing 4D chess when you just thought you were on a coffee date. They literally have an injured brain, it can never be healed, your empathy will be used to hurt you. It’s like you’re in the room with a demon, you better never turn your back on.

[@Lexi_Con]

True narcissists aren't typically self-aware, but they are pretty good at pretending to be as a manipulation tactic. They can even portray themselves as empathetic & selflessly caring for others (esp on social media), but they treat their partner like crap. It's all part of the game in creating a façade for the attention & flying monkeys.

[@aprilbarter]

​@@sighthoundlady15Jesus Christ heals, if we allow Him❤

[@katev3832]

Brilliant!! I love what you share with us, Alan, and the way you share it! ❤

[@Lyrielonwind]

That's what I was thinking; the worst thing you can say to a narcissist. You are telling them you can gaslight yourself.

[@vnkmy]

Interestingly I’ve found it also to be true for people who tend to avoid self-awareness and accountability to often unawarely distance themselves from self-aware people.

[@roseborden8445]

I agree

[@somethingbambi875]

Yes! Because I also saw their flaws, and they were shocked. The difference is I accepted them, but they could not. Sad

[@vnkmy]

@@somethingbambi875 I fully agree but I also want to add that these people usually tend to deny and or ignore flaws in relationship. Flaws are natural, we learn from and work on them. But they won’t go away by looking away.

[@nnylasoR]

My self-professed ‘avoidant’ husband is very awarely distancing himself from me - and he seems to be edging further and further the more I discover and deal with my own childhood trauma, hang ups, and addictions. He has no interest in working on himself ……………………..

[@quickgirl80]

Mostly they aren’t ready for the accountability that comes with self awareness or they’re toxic & want someone that isn’t self aware making them easy to manipulate and control.

[@テレビプレミアム-q5d]

Great advice. Everybody try this out. Go on a date and ramble on about your bad sides for 2 hours. See how that goes

[@karascene13]

I think you missed the point

[@Nyalede]

Totally agree about the importance of self awareness, but the "I'm sorry I'm so crazy" made me think about the pesto girl

[@JDoe001]

It’s just a matter of finding that crazy you want, and you get how much of it you can handle. (And vice-versa) 🥰

[@peekapeeka6482]

Being self aware means that you actually have to know yourself and accept who you are (including all the flaws). Often times people can’t even accept who they are

[@edmundjimenez9136]

Self awareness is great long term. But doesnt do good for getting the attention. Also self awareness doesnt do much if the person dont want to work on themselves. You can know you have self destructive behaviors but if you dont work on it. And just keep hurting yourself and others. Doesnt do much of anything.

[@MaryDunford]

Fair enough. But it seems a moot point. Why would anyone (who isn't self-destructive themselves) aim to attract such a person?

[@Anetusn]

@@MaryDunfordit just happens sometimes. People don’t think about the bad things in someone when they like them. They find out about them later.

[@greasymarlo2718]

Self-awareness is a never ending project. The type of person you are describing believes they have a little book inside them and they just need to read all the pages, and then they know their flaws and wonders and will forever and ever be completely known. They proclaim, “I have issues”, or tell you their issues quite readily as some kind of armor without doing more work and call themselves self-aware. This is akin to having a leak in your bathroom and shouting, “There’s a leak!” and expecting that to be the end of it. Perhaps the video (though it was a short) should have made the distinction that it’s the people who endeavour to continue mining themselves, accepting what they find, and showing compassion to themselves and others through the process, with some humor to boot, that are truly self-aware. But people who just repeatedly tell themselves they are “self-aware” or seek confirmation from others they are self-aware by unabashedly dumping their problems on to any passing soul are, usually in my experience, not very self-aware. Another poster displayed this quality talking about being on a date and unfortunately feeling quite moody, but not knowing why. They explained it, and luckily the date found it “mature and sexy”. Not everyone will, but it worked out. The poster seems like the type of person who doesn’t just label themselves “self-aware” but goes about the journey expecting a lifelong discovery of mountains and valleys.

[@ellysetaylor5908]

Peoples' subconscious is smart. Don't think that you can easily trick healthy people into thinking you're something you're not: things like "Cool" "smart" "effortlessly hot" "kind". People may not know, but they will feel something off about you if you try to fake these things. You must BECOME what you want to be and then simply be yourself. This is attractive

[@aelinsardothien8926]

Completely agree

[@visionvixxen]

Amen! This is my prayer every day- myself about my ASD issues -and for anyone I’m with…

[@NaturalHealingAlchemist]

Thee most attractive things are being honest, kind ,genuine & having self confidence.

[@purplebruh947]

Yeah, but only if you are also good looking, tall and rich:)

[@aprilbarter]

Good looks inevitably fade.

[@yesyesyesyesyesyes2021]

​@aprilbarter but they're the best attention grabbers, and people usually have more tolerance with prettier people

[@tbird81]

​@@aprilbarterMost attractive males retain their height, facial structure and build, even as they age. The features that men find attractive in women are more likely fade with age, which is why men will often cheat with a younger woman. (E.g. Dave Grohl)

[@mountain85]

True, I always ask him to self reflect before he apologizes. Hurting and saying sorry later doesn't help a relationship no matter what he earns.

[@surainihashim]

'I'm sorry, I'm so crazy'. Took the words right out of my mouth 😅.

[@Lazh-_-]

And here i am, lonely with no friends let alone a partner cuz I am too weird and no one even understands when I talk about my interests.

[@kikilala3430]

I feel you.

[@kasiako355]

If you be yourself, you are eventually going to find your 'tribe' 💖 Maybe you search in wrong places :)

[@somethingbambi875]

Same here. Thought I finally met like minded people, but they run away when I opened up my heart to them 😢

[@Adamcito.]

May I ask what are your interests? got me very intrigued. Sorry for the weird question 😅

[@alvideos2145]

Brooooooooooo, I've been single for 19 years, I am as self aware as you can possibly be about everything I do ,_,

[@madelynpocrnich]

This was very comforting thank you

[@-astrangerontheinternet6687]

Also- be aware, the people going about boasting to anyone that they’re so crazy- they usually are! They’re often disorganized and will do a bad job at anything you ask of them, and they’ll make it your fault for trusting them, bc you should have known- they’re so crazy!! Ugh. Just be genuine. Don’t apologize for who you are, and don’t make light of mental illness. Dudes.

[@elinek5470]

Sure. Or the person in front of you uses it against you later on.

[@BK_vvs]

Yeah but that’s not a good enough reason to not be vulnerable with ppl anyways, just do you.

[@neaparis6114]

That's exactly the kind of person you'd need to weed out. Still stay true to you. It's the best way to expose people who aren't for you!

[@LostinTime0310]

Best short so far today 🙌

[@Skyler827]

Being self aware is attractive sure but good looks, hygiene, status, etc are definitely factors of attractiveness.

[@skullbones6282]

Self-awareness doesn't absolve anybody of anything.

[@360.Tapestry]

self-awareness is like medicine. if you're sick, you need it. if you're well, it could actually make you sick

[@ryancox5097]

Important side note: this probably isn't the best thing to say to someone you're meeting for the first time, unless you like getting arrested.

[@danielaguzman6641]

If someone told me ‘’sorry I’m so crazy’’ it would give me the ick

[@lostandfound8008]

Thanks for the message 🙂

[@Corinabs]

If you’re actually attractive to the person physically the personally doesn’t matter much tbh most people mostly care about looks

[@dreamersleepwalker]

Yeah, great advice... That’s why my ex is my ex! Apparently, he was not a fan of honesty!

[@evremkan2758]

Self-awareness and self-development are separate things. I think what's _really_ attractive is being able to work on your development. Not only being aware of your flaws and apologizing for them.

[@claireschweizer4765]

These essays never miss for me ❤️

[@tthecooljose4674]

it's your flaws that make you unique... distinctness is desirable

[@mammamia2418]

Self-awareness... yeah...

[@SUCCESSPASS]

I love this❤

[@Zhae18]

This is so accurate

[@Durmomo0]

I believe this is true but I dont agree with how the title is phrased

[@ivanramirez8145]

We are all this way

[@stewartmair3995]

Yeah an award winning philosopher would tell us that introspection is the most attractive thing

[@marcg1043]

a wonderful simple message. thank you

[@D_Jilla]

It's incredibly scary to be self aware like this to someone you like and just met.

[@serajacob8278]

Favorite site 😊

[@EthernalOynuyor]

%80 Untrue words on modern conditions

[@Chuck_N0rris]

Self awareness is actually a very deep topic. Some may say it is what the fabric of the universe is made of. Self awareness is what separates humans from the animals. It takes so much computing power that we havent yet made computers self aware. Being highly intelligent and being wise isnt synonymous. The wise and the fool look alike. If you dont know the difference, you will mistake the master for a fool. -chat gpt

[@charliebotzman6423]

Calling yourself “crazy,” let alone apologizing for it SCREAMS being in a narcissistic relationship!

[@tomsenick2033p]

Yeah okay, looks and achievement don't matter

[@bernadettekiss7679]

I love that painting on the wall! With the dancing ladies 🤩 what is that? Like a full moon dance 🪩 🌚 I am feeling so jealous these days…maybe because of the Scorpio full moon

[@zezezep]

Beautiful

[@dianasandoval2147]

Wow so true!

[@rrrrrimaslah]

noted. self awareness. (bro who tf im keeping it in check for)

[@Marie-jz1qw]

But also you don't have to apologize for being yourself

[@ScottShedd123]

Crazy, "we all are." 👁👄👁

[@WhiteeDaisyy]

I am my weirdest self all the time, and dont hide my mistakes. However, the man I've encountered so far seem to have dismissed that, and only cared about my looks, telling me dirty things constantly. I'm so tired of it. I'm 25 and my strategy now is to AVOID being alone with men, because they're impulsive and can't understand my "no".

[@headofvengarl8893]

I'm fully aware that I am crazy and broken. I just have nothing to offer anyone

[@headofvengarl8893]

@@karolinakopaczyk941 hi, hope you're doing well

[@headofvengarl8893]

@@karolinakopaczyk941 hi there, hope you're doing well

[@htetaung04]

Know your own imperfections and be honest about them.

[@chaos-ku4vw]

I naturally have done this when meeting people and i disagree from personal experience They ran far and fast when i did this. People are such ptetenders nowadays that self awareness and admitting faults turns them off and makes them lose interest more oftrn than not. I used to believe this too before i found out otherwise.

[@TheGreatWasian_]

I lack self-awareness sometimes tho but I got the other shit that he said doesn't matter haha I need a partner who can openly communicate with me when I am doing something wrong or hurtful so that I know that I can accomodate them because I am typically always open to improvement.

[@nayabsultana3897]

Listen , I love ur voice.

[@katelynkeifer7887]

Unfortunately there are people out there who only date people based on their looks. Of course those relationships never last, but we live in a generation where people no longer care about personality.

[@Xdharvdaflame9110]

So true that!

[@DoBandu]

It's the reason why am I single 😢😢

[@nfvjgrofgjvoldlkgvlo]

'it has nothing to do with looks'?! COPE

[@denvetta]

I know i'm not tweaking does anyone else see Ice spice

[@KosMik_Skul]

holy shit! I fucking LOVE this!!!

[@doge-kun2710]

This works only if they find you physically attractive in the first place for most cases. Also being similar in personality is also second. Just being open only works when these two things are met. Why would I like a insane person that doesn't match any of my personality and I find ugly just cause there open. I can very open online and some people really don't like that.

[@shauldren75]

I have another tip for how to be as attractive as possible. Don't think you're the most attractive person they've ever seen.

[@danielmichael4907]

I would love to see how someone like the Tinder Swindler Pulls this off .... especially if he decides to take a second shot

[@ScubaAspen]

i like this perspective

[@powerralley]

Wtf? Physical appearance is very important.

[@sadiadagreat]

In the short run yes. But in the long run, the importance of looks fades.

[@LungaMasilela]

@@sadiadagreatThat’s true however physical appearance is the thing that makes you approach the person in question yet alone to be willing to go on a date.

[@primetimeourway]

​@@sadiadagreat wholly disagree. It might not be the most important thing over time, but it will always be important. Social studies show time and time again that the success of relationships long term boils down to whether or not the couple finds each other physically attractive long term. The good news is, what a person finds physically attractive can change over time, and personality can influence that to a degree.

[@tmgn7588]

you are already on a date. physical attractiveness is a given.

[@LungaMasilela]

@@tmgn7588 I don’t understand please elaborate

[@dragichav2810]

Bro I'm down bad to the shape lady 💀🥵 HELP

[@ritaruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu]

Many guys think Im weird, and just because Im not "pretty" (Im not less pretty than those guys but the standards are different so they call me ugly....) they always talk as if they are afraid I will like them, as if they are disgusted at the possibility, but I dont like them either, I actually have standards, and I like my weirdness, much better than not being polite and having basic manners towards another human being just because they are not super hot.

[@OrigamiJunkie]

I'm pretty self aware, and quite eccentric, polite, funny. I'm of above average looks, have self confidence and am pretty accomplished in the things I do. I'm extremely popular, but no one ever has a crush on me.

[@Quetzalcoatl-Dragon_97]

Huh

[@mykryptonite4819]

So you must be a liar

[@60minutesofenglishreadspea44]

Achieving self-awareness is not a simple task.. What will happen if you don't have it naturally? It is possible to develop it, but.. Doesn't this seem like the egg-chicken dilemma of what happened first? You have to have self-awareness in order to understand that you need to improve your self-awareness. Or, at the very least, some of it. What brings me back to the question I've been thinking about: Are humans naturally born with some degree of self-awareness?

[@chloemurdoch9074]

Personally, I find journaling and therapy are the best paths to self awareness 😊

[@JLakis]

We are born with some really loud self awareness! Wet? WAAAAAAH! Hungry? WAAAAAH! Some folks don't move on from there though, granted.

[@dstarr8222]

Well, I’m more familiar with empathy (which is a close relative) and yes - we have a set point in terms of that because we’re built differently. But we can improve it with some training or guidance from an expert (a counselor most likely). You can see some of this play out in career choices - a counselor will usually have a lot more empathy and self awareness than a computer programmer 😊 Always exceptions of course, but we know we’re built differently (personality psychology shows us that with a good distribution of people based on most anything you want to measure - self awareness, assertiveness, empathy, introversion, etc.) We also know that we can improve/change certain behaviors, but I think most psychologists would say we can only change so much from where we start from

[@jesselasalle5104]

I'm aware to the point that it pushes me away from any attraction. :/

[@HarishKumar-ji6hq]

Honesty

[@azukitadummy6290]

The thing is you wouldn't know how to be yourself. I'm not saying I believe the videos I watch, but yk KZbin does teach us a lot, and I watch KZbin a lot. It made me aware, that I don't know how to talk with anyone. Like I should be aware of what I'm saying, because I'll overthink in both cases. But, still, no one even cares.

[@jkevinparker]

Well if my wife of 25 years showed the slightest bit of self-awareness, we wouldn’t be getting a divorce, so that tracks.

[@EverAppl14]

This checks out. Everyone who has ever fallen in love with me has specifically said "You're crazy" when they've first met me.

[@RussMalina]

A lot of emotionally mature people in the comments.

[@imyourmyday_6]

Could someone please tell me which accent he speaks? Because it's really similar to mine now but i don't know where i picked that up from:))

[@saoirselove6193]

Self awareness 😅

[@scarlettfrancesca]

That's all well and good.... except most people are not self-aware, so even if you are, the chances are that you were on a date with someone else who also is, is actually quite unlikely. So even if you know yourself, it doesn't mean that your date can navigate whatever you are sharing, have space to take that on or even have the emotional intelligence to talk about those topics with you. It's not just about being self aware but you also need to find someone who has that ability as well.

[@tercioassis]

Too philosophical 😂

[@cristianescolar5311]

Also, an enormous amount of money makes a tiny little difference.

[@MLELELELEL]

Your voice. It hit me. I missed it

[@CourtneyCoulson]

No, that'll land you in the friend zone. To be attractive you have to be less available and less challenging. According to V Sauce.

[@user-ro6ng8vx1x]

Император - лучший выбор для романа

[@baris81g-oae]

👏

[@TamShelbyD]

Ugh there's nothing worse than those annoying girls who love to say OMG I'm soooo crrazzsyyy. I'm sooo kweeerrkkyyy

[@Tonedefdom]

Feedback to the school of life. This video was difficult to read and watch with the placement of text jumping around. Please keep up the good work, and try to road test these gems, as it took away from the value for me.

[@AiyaSGC87]

I can't read the subtitles with all of the titles and join button