How To Tell Her You Don't Want A Relationship

The exact phrase and time I teach all my students to tell women they only want casual sex.
Do you struggle telling women that you don't want anything serious? Do girls lose interest the moment you say you just want to keep it casual?
Lots of men find it difficult to tell a woman they don't want a relationship, or that they only want casual sex.
But oftentimes, the problem isn't that no women are open to casual - it's that men choose the worst time, and tell them in the worst way possible.
Because flirting should be fun.
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School Of Attraction
Dating And Relationship Coach
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[@jjc2323]

This is very interesting. Thank you for this insight

[@davidalexander4185]

I’m interested in learning how to be upfront that I do not w as not the expectations and responsibilities of a relationship but still want intimacy

[@Giopowered]

Ignore these salty comments. Nothing wrong with being genuine with your intentions. She has to handle her ego and take the rejection.

[@JackRabbit1612]

bro really said “don’t be emotionally honest because it’s the right, decent thing to do.. do it to preserve your own self-esteem.” yeah great attitude fella 🤨 not sleazy at all

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Wait, I'm super duper confused - how is being honest for your own self esteem sleazy? I mean - women hear that from me all the time, and absolutely love the message - so I'm not sure who you're thinking is going to find that sleazy...

[@JackRabbit1612]

Your priorities are out of whack man. The outcome seems positive, but you’re motivated by self-interest rather than genuine care for the person you’re communicating with. That’s not to say you shouldn’t look out for yourself, but self-preservation should not be one’s focus when trying to foster a relationship with another. Encourage others to be motivated by compassion, not fear or defensiveness. If you are truly concerned about making a person “feel deceived, manipulated, and used”, why encourage men to prioritize preserving their own self-esteem? Is that really the most effective strategy? The danger of hurting people isn’t damage to your self-esteem-- the real danger of hurting people falls on the people you are hurting. You’re coming at this problem from the wrong place man.

[@JackRabbit1612]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Otherwise this is solid advice, but motives are important, and I find yours somewhat skewed.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Ahh this is where we differ - I get you now... My mindset is this - Ultimately, EVERYTHING we do is self-interested. Mother Theresa felt REALY good about herself when she helped orphans - mind yoiu she was nasty to them at times behind closed doors as well.. But on another vantage point - I love my dog unconditionally - but i give her all that love becuase loving her and taking care of her FEELS GOOD to me - I keep giving her tonnes of care becuase it makes me feel good. I beleivei that we try to teach people to care about the feelings of others by shaming them into it "hey jonny that wasn't nice to do to sally, think about how much that hurt her, that was a bad boy thing" - Instead, I think it's much more powerful, to instead get jonny to do something nice for sally, then get him to reflect on how good that felt TO HIM to do something nice. So when I work with the guys - instead of trying to moralise and say "you should care abou ther feelings " which - lets face it, men either will already, or won't right? BUT if I show them how caring for others and doing the right thing benefits THEM in the long run - I have a greater chance of turning them around. But yes I honestly believe that we are all self-interested, no matter how many nice things we do for others, we do it becusae it feels good to be nice to other people - humans are wired that way. BUT sometimes, we aren't raised that way, so we focus on trying to be selfish and ignore the needs of others, which gives us short term pleasure, but long term we feel unhappy and unfulfilled. So while I can see where you're mind is at with how youi think - I believe quite wholeheartedly in my approach and that it is the right way to inspire people to become better human beings.

[@LoserDestiny]

Certainly not bad advice, but what to do if you are potentially open to a relationship, but after 1-2 dates (or even after you hooked up) with that girl you realize you are only interested in HER for something casual?

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

So if I start going on dates with a woman - I'm not going to suggest we're in an actual romantic relationship until I'm sure that's what I want. So that way I'd never get caught suddenly realising I only wanted to see her casually..

[@outlaw6]

Great information because I’m dealing with that right now😅 I am not trying to be in a relationship but she’s giving the impression that we’re going to be in one this is day number three so I gotta just say it

[@perc850]

Same! Wish me luck.

[@iCrazy414]

Need advice, I’m 29 she’s 39 I really like her a lot and we get along well and hooked up. But I’m scared of entering in a relationship with someone much older. We’re just dating at the moment but I know she’ll eventually pop the question. Am I being to shallow just thinking about the age difference? Should I give this a shot? Or try to keep it casual because of my insecurity.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

I think this is a super-fair question bud - I was in a situation myself like this when I was 25 - dating a 35 year old. I dont' think the consideration is shallow at all. There' s no perfect answer however - I left her because she wanted a family and I Was planning to start a family. You sort of have to work out what's right for yourself - but dont' feel bad or shallow if you do decide you don't want to be in a LTR with her.

[@zacharyhove4263]

I have a question about boosting your tinder score. So I’m 19, if I set my age preferences from 18-25 and swipe left on anyone 21-25 would it technically boost my score as I’m swiping left on 1/2 of the women?

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Hey mate, no, that will hurt you because at 19, most women 22 and over will swipe left on you, which is much more harmful for your ranking than who you swipe left on

[@Giopowered]

Wait till your 21 for dating apps. No woman wants a teen and the ones that do. Most likely won’t be good for u lol especially that your inexperienced

[@jamesmata2945]

Omg this is the only video like this. Alk the other ones is she doesnt want a relationship or why she wont date you. 😂

[@Giopowered]

Man facts. Usually women are the ones telling men this😂 especially if he’s the one pursuing. But men should be telling the women how things are going to go and if she’s down with it or not

[@MrSirGonza]

What is the difference between a casual and long-term relationship? Because I want casual relationships, but don't really know why I don't want long-term ones. I'm so confused.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

The difference is that one is committed and usually monogamous, while the other is just sexual and you spend less time being emotionally close

[@MrSirGonza]

@@SchoolOfAttraction Thanks!

[@Teezypeezy21]

I told her at the beginning still didn't work. We hooked up, she acted crazy and still pushed for a relationship anyways.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

It's an ongoing process - Sometimes a woman just doesn't want to listen - but then you are absolved of doign something wrong.

[@perc850]

I can relate...

[@joem420]

I actually think having this conversation early actually helps with hook ups. Like from the start you’re letting her know that you’re not looking for a friend. Saves you time and misunderstanding

[@martintheguitarist]

This question makes no sense to me. Assuming a guy is not an idiot, he is not going to make someone his girlfriend before dating her for at least 12 months. During these 12 months and even after he may decide this is not the right woman for him. It's really the women who need to have more realistic expectations.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Most women will assume she's your girlfriend if you've been dating regularly for a month or 2.

[@demonreturns4336]

Most will think they are your GF the minute the panties are dropping

[@josephzaki4353]

dont agree, high value women will just react with: who told i even want to have anything with you? you dont mention anything until she does, thats the rule.

[@vegetalover1009]

You should tell her on the first date or maybe even before the first date.

[@kjthomas4553]

Tell her from the jump

[@comdo831]

Women will instinctively seek long term relationship. You may tell them that's not what you're after, and the woman may even be ok with this approach because then she doesn't have to make up her mind right away. They like to take the time to think and consider. But deep down most women will pursue this objective to establish something with the potential to last. Essentially women stand to lose more from constantly swapping partners.

[@Koettnylle]

How did you reach the conclusion that this applies to "most women"?

[@comdo831]

@@Koettnylle There are exceptions to the rule, so it's not all women. You want proof, just look around you, talk to people and observe how they behave. There's a reason why women shy away from the likes of Tinder.

[@Koettnylle]

@@comdo831 My point regarding proof is that personal observations is not enough to make a reliable and valid conclusion about half of the planets population (i.e. women). I write this because my personal experience is pretty contrasted to yours. Your experiences - as well as mine - can very well be valid from our personal standpoints, but in terms of sample sizes they're too small to make generalized claims, as far as i can tell.

[@comdo831]

@@Koettnylle Of course factors like the local culture/religion and the social circles close to you may sway your perception one way another. But like I said, if women in general were into short gigs, there would be a lot more of them on the dating sites, and these sites are present everywhere.

[@pedrocordeiro4091]

if you tell a woman that you dont want a long term relationship you will get imediatly rejected. UNLESS you have lots of money or looks

[@vegetalover1009]

Pedro Cordeiro so? Lying or misleading for your own benefit is extremely selfish and kinda does make you an asshole.

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

All I Can say is, this isn't true - I know this becuase I've worked with lots of guys who have neither money nor looks

[@meneliksolomon7984]

its really key how you say it without turning her off n still showing its reasonable, and that's not easy

[@kjthomas4553]

Not necessarily

[@namugeraelvis2345]

First. ✌️

[@comdo831]

So what?

[@mrpookies1]

You are the definition of a creepy guy

[@SchoolOfAttraction]

Lucky for me then, that you aren't my taste in woman huh? :P