How YOU INFURIATE the Narcissist (Narcissistic Rage)

[@carospereman3537]

I've come to the conclusion that just existing infuriates a narcissist : /

[@AdAsteris]

Yep, so f-em hahaha

[@DeborahG67]

Facts. Their mission is to destroy us.

[@DianeMatlock-v6y]

The FACT that you can breathe without them...😏

[@dannillebennett1761]

You must be an INFJ in the MBTI 😂

[@DeborahG67]

@dannillebennett1761 ? I don't get it🤷🏽

[@seagull5000]

As I have suffered decades of abuse from a narcissist in my family I can say that you are the only one who helped me understand what is happening and how to protect myself. You will never know the full impact you have on people's lives. To give you a clue I will say it is the exact opposite of the impact narcissists have on people's lives. We love you!! you are an extraordinary human being!

[@Donken98A]

I watch his videos everyday to gain insight of this obnoxious disorder. I’m wiser and stronger. Thanks Sam

[@Ascerian]

This is one of your very best videos, right on the money. Thank you

[@pomhubnz-hq]

Knowing thyself annoys the narcissist most!!

[@larisas8925]

I spent 39 years with the narcissist and sociopath. I never knew what is narcissist just five years ago I find out what is a narcissist actually from your video.

[@startingovaries]

I live among Many senior citizens with narcissistic malignant traits and it's both comical and a nightmare.

[@TrevorHamberger]

I find that the baby boomer generation is absolutely littered with Narcissistic people. Something happened in their schooling starting in about 1967 that absolutely destroyed those people. It has something to do with the way they were trained to please their bosses. It all wound up creating millions of narcs

[@aloksrivastava7938]

There has been same proportion of narcissists in every generation. The only issue is that narcissists get worse as they age and good people rarely make it to the old age, which is why malignant narcissism is at peak levels among senior citizens.

[@FuchAwfhs]

Big facts 😂😅😮😢

[@rubberbiscuit99]

They get worse with time, in my experience. And over time they lose the people who they abuse, so fewer and fewer people are willing to come around them.

[@OrielThomson]

We can't win with these losers. Run and never look back.

[@questroyal8650]

Its a good one !! Well said !!

[@YaLittleFriend]

Yessss!

[@AntonicontHandmadeLures]

I think you may be the most competent person in the world about this subject matter. This is literally the description of my narcissistic boss, to the point that I had shivers down my spine while listening to it. Very eye-opening, congratulations.

[@maryfrances1307]

Act accordingly and you’ll make it to the top.😊

[@orealeo6652]

There was not a holiday that he did not beat me. Not even once. And I also never understood why every single time we went to restaurant ( home or abroad) he refused to order the food but then was eating most of my plate . Every single time !!!!What seems cute for teens is annoying for married couples .And me being polite to waiters , triggered him too. What was I suppose to do ???? I couldn't flirt to save my life , but politeness to someone who works minimum wage is a must in my opinion. I always found this bizzare and never understood it. And also once he found me putting face mask and later lipstic before we supposed to go out to celebrate his MALE friend birthday. He became so aggressive, screaming etc. But then so many times he complained about me being "rusty" and he seemed as if he was ashamed of me in front of his friends. But yet was not happy with me putting on make up. I seriously didn't understand any of it. Yet I've wasted maaaany years of my life. Before wedding he was very charming though.

[@sharonmcclintock6727]

Good morning Sir from South Carolina, USA. Been watching almost daily for 3 years. You are who I chose to believe when trying to heal. So, thank you!

[@sharonmcclintock6727]

@samvaknin-p1m 754?

[@sharonmcclintock6727]

Ah! Days....yes! :)

[@absolute-6664urazz]

So glad you said : "Comical' Because yes, I was raised by malignant narc gma and covert narc mom and to me... Im immuned to that toxic behavior as an adult. When I see narc behavior in people, I LAUGH. Sometimes, even encourage it. Because I enjoy watching them 'lose their shyt' and embarass themselves. It secretly tickles me to watch someone who calms to be so in control and unbothered, to become a screaming lunatic. I LOVE IT!

[@zeynebdevres]

Perfectly explained all around! Thank you so much. Even though they’re so predictable, their rage, anger, verbal abuse, cussing, slamming doors etc still emotionally upsets me. I feel like a truck has passed over me! I become physically sick after these episodes.

[@kelleyf]

And what about the next morning and they seem fine-smiling and saying have a nice day? Mine was on a tear and demanding I cook him dinner at 9:30pm or he would die. Is this bi-polar?

[@Nylon_riot]

​@kelleyf Bipolar is more that they don't have an emotional filter. The manic is really manic and the lows are really low. Some can cycle fast or over weeks or months but it usually isn't predictable. By no filter I mean really impulsive behavior. I use the example that if you have a sports car and a nice empty highway, a regular person will think they could get a ticket or have an accident and rationalize themselves out of speeding. Bipolar will just speed, there is no rational process. It is why they act on crazy ideas. Sometimes to the point of being a danger to themselves. NPD is actually a little more predictable with their cycles and responses.

[@zeynebdevres]

@@kelleyf yes! Stay strong and Independent. Do not engage. Walk away or shut-up. 💞🙏🏼

[@ninawire9006]

Awesome video. Get well soon, Professor.

[@TrevorHamberger]

Infuriating the narcissist is what I'm best at. It just comes natural to me. All I have to do is act like myself and they become infuriated on a level you can't even imagine. I still have people from my high school who are narcissists who stalk me 15 years later and I've never even spoken to them in my entire life

[@kevingillard5474]

Got any pointers???

[@TrevorHamberger]

@@kevingillard5474 not really because everything that works for me is what I developed having faced this type of abuse for so long. but it certainly does help to not care what anyone thinks about you

[@Deb-lw4rr]

They absolutely hate me too.

[@lizzierose007]

They hate empaths like me, too...😂

[@TrevorHamberger]

@lizzierose007 the thing that I've noticed in my life is that I essentially have a sign on me that attracts them all. There's something about my upbringing of abuse that leaves me with The Tell-Tale signs of someone that could easily be exploited. So for whatever reason I have a flashing sign around me to narcissist that says mess with me anyway you can. So I've dealt with these types of people from every angle imaginable. And until I learned what narcissism is I was pretty much clueless about any of it. Now that I know they can't ever do anything to me ever again

[@TheFooleryFactory]

Once again, THANK YOU Professor Vaknin. Even with a planet full of Flying Monkeys, your words make more sense than theirs ever will.

[@sssttt2211]

I met such a person, he was calling me illiterate, needy, clingy but in behavior he was showing all these qualities himself... He was calling me angry but he was accusing me left and right and getting angry on small things, he was even gossiping like girls gossip... He was telling me his sister's opinion about me, that clearly shows he was either telling everything to his sister about me or he was simply lying... I caught this person lying with me redhanded...

[@maryfrances1307]

Proverbs 4:7 Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding. Sam Vaknin, you truly provide both wisdom and understanding of cluster B personalities. The insight you provide has allowed me to approach narcissists (and borderlines) in an objective, nonemotional way. You’ve saved me much grief and provided an education that money can’t buy. I truly appreciate you.

[@carlastopher1686]

"You NEVER LISTEN" .. "YOU MAKE ME DO THINGS I DON'T WANT TO DO"" And "I am ALWAYS RIGHT!" ....None of those words are reality! It would be crazy making if you weren't grounded in reality. Thanks Sam!❤

[@larisas8925]

When I used to work, I guess a lot of people start knowing me. He didn’t like that he did anything possible just to take me out of the job. He promised me too much and I did believe him and I come out of the job.

[@christinestrickland8470]

I am so thankful to have found you. You’re always spot on every single time. Thank you for your unique dispensary of knowledge. ❤

[@cheeksmcgill9858]

So, you’ve met my brother it would seem. I believe he has, with the aid of medical marijuana and alcohol crossed into psychopathy. I go all the way back to one of your videos about NOT keeping the threats secret. Nothing like sunlight to disinfect, right? I’ve been blissfully, “No Contact,” for nearly 6 years. It’s peaceful.

[@maryfrances1307]

Spot on! Secrets are narcissistic fertilizer.

[@jbuntine1255]

Hello 6 yrs also I confronted my brother 48 yrs of abuse. A user dumping his children on my mother , she was ill CA and on palliative care. He went into a rage , over grown toddler . He's sick to the core.

[@MyMagicalSpace]

I am so grateful for your clarity 🤗 this makes a huge difference! 🙏

[@TheBadSpoon]

You have vastly improved my understanding of this topic. Thanks again, Sam. Oh, and please protect that wonderful voice of yours. It is genuinely a voice I wish I had. My own is much lighter, so I find the sound of it annoying.

[@TraciDoering-hw8hu]

I’m sure your voice is perfectly fine. Love yourself. You are worth it.

[@tamz-b1h]

Narc recently moved out. 🙌He flew into a rage when I offered him a fire-extinguisher for his new place. Mind you we are co-parenting, and I was mostly thinking of my children's safety. Even after dealing with this for nearly 10 years his reaction still shocked me a little. I just slammed the door in his face. All I could think is this is why we're not together anymore.

[@larisas8925]

Very aggressive that they cannot forget all the things that he done to me. I’m trying to forget, but I can’t.

[@colibri7-m1h]

Me neither, the sadist in this was horrific. Cannot forget, but maby in time put it back in our mind...

[@CreamofWheat13]

Sam , thanks so much for the information, I’ve been listening to you for years. You have helped me tremendously. You are an awesome intelligent guy! Damn

[@ancabostinariu6550]

Thank you for the great lectures.

[@defaultuser7777]

Feel better 🙏 thank you for the content even though you're not feeling 100 percent. Take care 🙂

[@tamanderson3250]

I thought I had a book to write , listening to you it has already been written. I had no idea this was a science , always considered psychology as an impresise subject . I bow to you through life confirmation as an employee.

[@Levo75]

I keep having to rewind your videos because I go back to remember the moments to re-label what happened.

[@RégineBENJAMIN-g1u]

Here's looking at you Sam! Lots of love from Paris

[@larisas8925]

Now here again, I learn one more thing from you keep calling me a thief that I stole from him actually, he stole from me, but he’s calling me

[@mrsthatcher9815]

thankyou sam im in a current battle with a colleague and this explains every stage in perfect detail. Its uncanny!

[@sicobain]

Sending the divorce paper it infuriated him so much, he said that he can find someone to accept who he is, even I begged him to seek for help, stop with alcohol, etc. I'm totally destroyed because I still love him and he mocked me, he called me a coward and that I never loved him.

[@rogerrobinson4446]

I triggered someone once just by trying to explain to them how perpetual motion isn't possible

[@larisas8925]

Yeah, I actually leave this life for 36 years I believe and when I understand, I’m living with a narcissist I stopped the media and I’m filing for a divorce. Narcissist took everything from me. He don’t leave me a dollar in my hand so it’s hard to go with nothing. He tricked me good when you don’t know that you’re dealing with the narcissist you just go with the floor you believe in him.

[@jbuntine1255]

Yes l can't belive the 20 yrs l endured. And he said would l reconsider, as l left . The silence was defening.

[@orealeo6652]

You are very lucky. Do you know why ? Because it is YOU who made that decision. Even if heartbreak is big, it is N O T H I N G to compare when it is NARCISSIST who discards you. This would not even be that hard , but think of situation when he discards his children too. And you have to watch them suffer TREMENDOUSLY. And bc they have noone to blame , they blame and lash against you. One day their father is there ( even if abusive and unpredictable) , next day he is not and HE REFUSES TO SEE THEM. He doesnt have time as new much younger supply is absolutely bessoted with him. It is a de th by thousands cuts.

[@Prodluud]

Thank you for making videos they are helpfull and packed with knowledge. 🍀

[@Guitarwzrd]

"that doesn't work for me brother" -Terry

[@larisas8925]

One more thing that he took call my friends, he make my friends his friends and put them against me, so we leave me with no friends that you cannot share all these things with nobody that you would be close with yourself that you would not tell nobody what he’s doing to you and how is torturing you

[@rebeccalucas6063]

My ex narcissist comes from wealth, and because I act like myself, and not some snooty uppity spoiled princess, I was discarded. He calls his eldest (adult) daughter a spoiled b! 7¢π , yet, because I'm a down to earth person, I was devalued. 🤔 So, being your genuine authentic self makes them angry and hate you ? 🤔

[@MrsK976]

The holiday ruining….. wow! 4th of July, Easter, My birthday…….. years of it. Tantrums, anger/aggression/ rage…….

[@larisas8925]

Is looking at your program or your ChinaL I’m learning more and more about the narcissist. Thank you for everything.

[@kayb947]

Thank you professor

[@mikelockhart5528]

The 34:45 mark says so much!!- You spend years trying to figure out what exactly they are so pissed about. You spend years thinking you can tiptoe around the right/wrong things to keep them from acting like a complete nut job. Then you eventually learn that it makes no difference.

[@stephaniemillsaps3626]

LOVE 🙏 🙏 🙏

[@larisas8925]

And this narcissist when I go to the therapy, he decide to go to my doctor and take the power of attorney on me. That’s saying that I’m psycho and I need to put in the cycle hospital so we used to treat me that you’re gonna put me in the psycho hospital

[@colibri7-m1h]

There are no bundries....😞

[@kathleenosullivan8209]

Its terrifying to them when your a seperate person. X

[@larisas8925]

Yes, send me actually success he did anything possible to remove me of the job and remove me out of the Neighbourhood too far from that place

[@blitzerblazinoah6838]

Absolutely brilliant thumbnail. Terry "Hulk Hogan" Bollea is a textbook narcissist egomaniac.

[@j.o.n.u.3169]

Me encanta esta canción. Han hecho dueto maravilloso.🥰♥♥♥

[@MooncakePanda]

I love your content. Can you suggest how a mother who is coparenting with a covert passive aggressive narcissist who withholds information and manipulates, might communicate about things the children don’t want to do when they’re with him, without triggering him to fly in a rage, take it out on the children, and drag the mother to court out of vindictiveness? Thanks so much for all you do!

[@rancho-relaxo-radio]

Similar case here. I don't try anymore. My ex won't accept any suggestion because he is superior and knows way better. There is no such thing as "coparenting" with these people. I've accepted that my kid has to adapt to his dad's nonsense and I can't control it. As Vaknin says: "don't be controlling, don't be like the narcissist". When my son is with me he knows that I'm here to listen to him and that I won't force him to do things that he doesn't want to do. Show your kids that you are not like the narcissist and teach them how to cope with the narc. They will have to cope with lots of them in their adult life anyways. I would only "defy" the narcissist if it was a serious matter. And of course I would take him to court if necessary. I wish you the best. You are strong and you are not alone.

[@thebirima91]

Is a narcissist making stuff in the house disappear high on the spectrum or just being childish? At times extremely annoying but I pretend not to see it.

[@CoolCat.Selina]

Hi Prof. Vaknin , like all of us here (I hope) , I appreciate the free content , your time and commitment in academic and clinical information that you provide even for us mortals . Thank you . I have been wanting to comment for a long time to suggest that the cluster B is callously attacked by pop gurus , money grabbing etc. and mostly the extremes are presented . So I am asking … how does a cluster B recover from depression , mortification , lack of power ? I have searched and searched a video dedicated to it , apparently we can even manipulate ourselves during difficult times since that’s all we do all day . We re all monsters that don t deserve anything except being obliterated , no matter where we are on the spectrum , so the normies feel special too ( sorry couldn’t help it ) Some of us just want to get back to being overachievers , create beauty , being high functioning and briliant and make it all look easy , no matter the anxiety levels and sadness that we have inside or making ourselves small just to keep connections … no one talks about that , it’s not as juicy for the boring normies

[@samvaknin]

Search the two therapies playlists and the Life's Wisdom playlist.

[@CoolCat.Selina]

@ Thank you

[@larisas8925]

I don’t know how is that doctor did that? I guess he pay him. I went through a lot with this narcissist intern now I’m fighting to find out where is the power of attorney hiding and what he did with that power of attorney I’m gonna have to find out. I don’t know how but I would try. I believe it went to court instead of me to get my money. This person need a special place for him Jell-O hell.

[@elviravonwiren1529]

Yes,I find it very funny when the N starts this tantrum..I must 😂 laugh because of the causes of this outbreaks! I have worked my whole life with life and death and war so that is the level for me to take seriously 😅

[@KellyRice-o5x]

I saw her rage becauseni brought change all right but iam so glad i left.

[@comradebish]

Why do some narcissists become therapists? I know a clinical psych student who threw a rage over timeliness. I sincerely believe that person is not suited to helping others.

[@user-sh3vv4fd2rMr.K]

My ex would rage, then afterwards wouldn't even remember. She told me she has rage blackouts.

[@cheeksmcgill9858]

My first husband would do this as well. It’s a lie.

[@BAsed_AFro]

When someone shows you who they are when angry, it means that their behavior during moments of anger reveals their true character.

[@KellyRice-o5x]

Oh my they lived with Narcissist for a long time

[@larisas8925]

Do you understand that that he don’t want me even to go to therapy cause the minute I go to therapy he go there and do some kind of shenanigans against me

[@yutu...]

You're explaining my life in a different way. I'm starting to think all INTP (mbti) or. ILI (socionics) are cerebral narcissists. I do get angry when someone tries to shame me. Because I'm the Critic, that's my role in society... ect.

[@larisas8925]

Or it would come and tell me that I’m cursed I guess he cursed😂

[@larisas8925]

And you would like to make work for nothing he would look for a reason to make a war now people that don’t know what is narcissist they would eat shit they would keep lying and lying, and those poor people would buy their lies. One of them is his boss. He don’t know yet he’s dealing with the narcissist. I feel bad for him.

[@Colouraves]

"emphasis on humble" lol

[@lovepeace8845]

Is it ever okay to cry?

[@gyvasties]

What would you say about people who have assimilated a few of these traits over decades of exposure to narcissistic abuse? Have we become semi narcissistic ourselves? Is there hope to eradicate such traits from our repertoire?

[@samvaknin]

Search the channel for CPTSD and for “contagio”.

[@hoppas77]

I can find all kind of videos about what a narcissist is and how to avoid them, etc but I cannot find videos how to 'help' someone who is a narcissist. Why is that? I think I have narcissistic tendencies or may even be a narcissist. I dont want to be this way and have worked years on trying to better myself however, I still struggle. Will you ever do videos on how to better yourself as a person with narcissistic tendencies? If not, do you know a channel that can help?

[@samvaknin]

Watch the 2 therapies playlists. Only 100+ videos.

[@hoppas77]

@@samvaknin Thank you! Im newer to this channel and didn't see those.

[@ชีวิตวัยชรา]

No matter what you do, once you hit a narcissist's soft spot, their rage will leave you reeling. Have you ever experienced this? The reason behind the anger!

[@Old-Bald-and-Grumpy]

The reason is insecurity, and fear of being exposed as a weak person. A little bit of disrespect and N will take off like a starship.

[@Олександр-к6о2л]

When I listen these videos, I can see traits of narcisism in myself... But, probably, not all of them... How can I discover more?

[@bursuculgastric007]

When do you have a conference in Germany, Bavaria to be more specific?

[@samvaknin]

When I am invited there.

[@bursuculgastric007]

@@samvaknin I’ll invite you now 😉! I’ll talk to the people at the clinic where I work!

[@B4N4NiNj4]

​Thats awsome ​@@bursuculgastric007

[@tinasbeans]

Would you consider a group text as “public” when it comes to humiliating a narcissist? Say, you send a text to multiple people part of a family that enables a narcissist and they all receive the message via text.

[@samvaknin]

Yes.

[@KellyRice-o5x]

I for three years while caring for my mother couldbt give my best because of my brothers girlfriend evil narc very very angry to the point she dont care if she gets in your face and they isolated me like you said because i would not agree to do what she says she couldnt brainwash me. Fyi i left after she turned my daughter against me

[@Esther15889]

I still don`t understand why am I the only one of his girlfriends (out of 3, all long distance, me included) to experience such rage directed toward me and verbal abuse. I asked his previous girlfriend recently and she says he was great toward her, never a single bad word. Previously, he told me he abused her, too, admittedly, not as much as me. I just don`t understand. Is it possible he loved her truly...

[@kathleenosullivan8209]

They love no one. He is just exploiting ger in some way. Or she is still in idealise phase.

[@flashman2]

My x G/F was in the cluster B group .Was she covert narc or BPD I didn't know but thank God I left her😊

[@apubanerjee5496]

Dear PROF SAM 👉 🌟 star content 🌟 🌟🌟🌟 . Each & every word uttered here is core pin point accurate the fire ball truth of a true narcissist . It is like calling the emperor :----- 👇 👉 you are naked 👈 👆 .

[@larisas8925]

Now, if you would find out about all these comments, he probably would close my KZbin too. You have to get out of this shit. The thing is is not the one that doing this paying people to do this so when they get caught, it’s not him it’s those people.

[@germainetriplett7124]

Sounds like the next president to me… every day he’s tweeting something about this person about that person about this person. He’ll never tell you to your face. He’ll wait and tweet something like when he went to visit Canada and a Canadians were like no we’re not paying the high towers F you. And Trip was like OK OK waited till he left and tweeted something about Canada

[@LegendaryMel]

Blake lively is a narcissist

[@Marie-j8v]

I WANT RO ORGANIZE STH IN BERLIN!! But how? Asking a theatre maybe? I’m from Theatre.. but not connected to a certain one😬

[@wellthatgotweird]

That you used Hulk Hogan from CPAC in the thumbnail is an example of what the U.S. is now; a joke. An unserious confused joke

[@davidjofficial1]

The U.S. became a joke when a narcissistic black man decided to divide the country in a race war.

[@js424u]

The narcissistic black guy was bad but the new guy is a laughing stock 😂.

[@davidjofficial1]

@js424u agreed, thankfully Biden will only be in office for one more month.