Human Mate Guarding Ft. Macken Murphy

[@marriagecausesdivorce7540]

4:15 this is such a good point that no one ever mentions. Getting into a relationship is the easy part. Maintaining a relationship is the hard part, especially when kids, bills, post natal depression, miscarriages, low testosterone, illness, arguments about parenting style, job losses, lack of promotions/ambition, weight gain, sexlessness, etc get involved. Be careful what you wish for.

[@v9b23j]

Verbal abuse behavior is a form of mate guarding that has been described as a cost-inflicting mate guarding strategy. David Buss hypothesized that it's used by a partner with a lower mate value to lower the self-esteem of the partner with a higher mate value in order to prevent them from leaving the abuser. As Macken said, I hope that knowledge of this strategy can educate people who are targets of this strategy so that they can make an informed decision.

[@Clovmemar]

the dog is just on the sofa listening carefully haha so cute

[@terratokyo]

1:05:40 "once you're in a relationship shell pour more into it later. So just cover the first two dates."... How about no? What the host lady fails to realize, is as a guy, you are NOT guaranteed a relationship just because you go on a date. . This means the men have all the costs and no return. A good approach for men might be, "hey if she isn't sending clear signals she's interested during the date. Decide then, to split. Don't invest money into a failing or lackluster startup."

[@BlackJesusChrist666]

I'm a (simp)le man, I see Chadlight Murphy, I click.

[@murphymacken]

😂🫶

[@TwentyTwo_22_]

Absolutely fascinating conversation, saving this to watch again and again to absorb all in the info! Please bring back Sherrie (and maybe Ellen too), loved the Rules conversation! Thank you both

[@lifeofmarinNYC]

Thank you!! I will definitely ask and see what I can do

[@BramCohen]

Negging isn't new. Negging was always there. If you read 'The Art Of Seduction' like a third of it is negging. What's new is that there's a word for it and people talk about it in public, which has made it much less effective so people do it a lot less.

[@lifeofmarinNYC]

Definitely not new, but many phenomenons in dating continue to repeat --yet still interesting to discuss/study

[@BramCohen]

@@lifeofmarinNYC Telling people about negging is definitely a good thing. Women who don't know about it unwittingly encourage men to do it more, which isn't good for anybody's personal health. It's also done in the opposite direction, with the onlyfans pay-to-simp business model being basically the same thing

[@cheeks7050]

Macken is very forgiving to Marin when she suggests that men need to up their game. He could've easily told her how entitled she was being.

[@CSAcrazy]

He’s a self proclaimed feminist. So he wouldn’t do that. He probably agrees with her

[@rosameltrozo5889]

As unreasonable as it is now, it's still following human nature to demand men step up and women just receive the fruits of their labour

[@ocelot8321]

It’s quite strange to me how much he frames women making 500k, an absolute minority, in so many of his perspectives. The reality is women still earn less than man substantially, while still taking 100% of child raising and majority of housework. It’s proven women who earn high amounts have no reduction in housework share with their male partner. For most couples, the men should be providing financially. That is the resource men provide to a relationship and the raising of offspring. When you subtract the financial value of housework and childbirth from a successful woman’s wage, she is earning less than the man every single time. It makes no sense for any men to be living off a woman’s wage and there is a reason why women have less desire for men who earn less than they do

[@cmp6008]

Women who make a lot of money are the target demo of this podcast

[@lifeofmarinNYC]

this is a really good point

[@v9b23j]

Australian research has revealed that a woman receiving a pay rise that makes her the primary earner in her household increases her risk of experiencing domestic violence by 35%. The study, based on surveys from the Australian Bureau of Statistics over more than a decade, also shows that when women earn more than half of a couple’s income, their risk of emotional abuse rises by 20%. Another study found that in couples where the woman outearns the man, there is an increase in the male partner's use of ED medication, intimate partner violence and infidelity.

[@CSAcrazy]

Women are also the people who stopped prioritizing men’s ability to provide financially because they’ve become more independent and don’t care about it. The outcome is not accepting poorer men and changing their priorities to shared values, child rearing ability, attractiveness. They just do without men completely and have effectively turned themselves into spinsters and cat ladies

[@ocelot8321]

@@v9b23j exactly, that’s why it’s so so strange to me so much of this is focused on relationship dynamics that significantly more dangerous to women