I Discovered My Husbands Ex's Diary, Should I Reveal The TRUTH To My Husband r/Relationships

[@LoveK1]

Story 2 is full of idiots. The whole pestering his sister and letting her get reamed by his gf is atrocious. AND he kissed that witch goodbye.

[@Floratic]

Yeah. OP p1ssed me off in story 2. At least he took his sister out to a nice restaurant at the end.

[@CurliFox]

He also keeps calling her, "my girlfriend," even after he supposedly "broke up with her." 🤨

[@giovanilevin616]

She was his first in many ways, so I'm not surprised he didn't react the way we would expect. As for his sister, yes, he was an asshole, but he's not the first and he won't be the last to shoot the messenger. At least he regrets it and acts accordingly.

[@jeffreed2848]

She was his first. His brain isnt going to be all perfect with his judgment and feelings towards her. The important thing is, he broke it off and is aware that is the right move. Its a learning experience

[@slick8086]

@@jeffreed2848 It is not really how he feels about her that is his problem it is his lack of self respect that is the problem. Hopefully after this with some reflection he will learn to respect himself and people like his sister who truly have his back.

[@cardamom_coldbrew]

Story 2 OP kind of sucks as a brother; he just let his girlfriend verbally abuse his sister until she had to ask him to stand up for her.

[@thatjeff7550]

Well it was his first girlfriend so he probably doesn't understand that you shouldn't kiss your ex as she's leaving.

[@LEVAR20]

Did you not listen to anything that was said? He literally said he tried to stop her but the thing is the sister is older than op is. Sis need to grow a back bone and stand up for herself. She only took the punishment cause she probably knew the girlfriend was right.

[@allisoncastle]

⁠@@LEVAR20 are you kidding me? Did YOU hear anything that was said???

[@robertx8020]

@@LEVAR20 You really 'like' women, don't you /s

[@brominete9]

@robertx8020 mate wtf does that mean?

[@VeireDame]

"Ugh I hate your sister, she's always acting like she's so moral & so much better than me!" She ain't acting, babe

[@simonO712]

Indeed. She's not being moralistic, just moral.

[@vanzy01]

💯👍🏿

[@gwdzee]

ikr? Pretty rich coming from someone who thinks her and op's sex life was up for public discussion/mocking. Her shocked pikachu reaction to op breaking up with her was hilarious.

[@owl7072]

Story 2: "You love stirring the pot!" There wouldn't be anything to stir in the pot if girlfriend wasn't adding shit to it to begin with 🙄

[@jusminejustice2794]

The ex has a lack of braincells to think it was a brilliant idea to talk smack a front of her Bf's sister- Like what did she expect? Of course a sibling will have their own blood's back then your sorry behind.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@McAnik-uo1ol]

Gaslighting and deflection. Problem is the ExGF's big mouth. Quick! Make it about something (anything) else.

[@MasterBuilderDragon]

OP: Tell me what my girlfriend said! Sister: *tells him* OP: WTF?! Why would you tell me that?!

[@Raaslen]

Yeah, that pissed me off too, but let's face it, he is basically a teenager, expecting him to be rational about it is kind of unreasonable, and since he owned his mistake and took the steps to apologize to his sister I think we can "let him off with a warning" this time.

[@lindah3803]

The days of being young and naive and ill equipped. At least with OP it's kinda cute. Brand new to the BF/GF life. Fortunately he has a great sister to help guide him. Also, he's a good guy. Yes, he got stupid for a short bit. He realized it. Did the right thing. You can tell that he does love and respect his sister. When OP was describing the screaming match, he said that he tried to get them to calm down. That tickled me. I thought: You tried to get 2 girls screaming at each other to calm down. You tried to get 2 girls to Shut Up. Did you even get 2 words in with them.

[@jackspring7709]

@@Raaslen Lol - that's not a youth issue, that's a doormat/enabler issue. His sister is very young, too, and seems to understand things perfectly well.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@miz6229]

S2 - OP was a tool. He seriously just sat there and didn't defend his sis. To even questioned and harassed his sis about why she did what she did.

[@Floratic]

I feel like if the sister didn't yell at him to defend her, he would've continued letting the girlfriend berate her, and he wouldn't have broken up with her. OP didn't have half the smoke for the girlfriend like he did for the sister.

[@One.DeSanctis.]

Garbage human

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@ToxicSunrise132]

Yeah next time OP's sister overhears something about one of his friends or a future SO, she's gonna keep her mouth shut.

[@creidy2018]

Op in story 2 is so insufferable he honestly deserves his ex, just to take both of them out of the dating pool for the sake of everyone else and our sanity

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@hubbachubba1]

Lol! I love it!

[@camdanebbett-urquhart9443]

Tbh op sound kinda neurodivergent we often struggle with situations like this I don't think that means op deserves the awful ex I think it just means op has some growing to do

[@akkiko]

@@camdanebbett-urquhart9443 dude didn't understand why his sister was upset for him. bro isn't just clueless- he doesn't even know what a clue is. if he's gonna grow he's gonna have to be jump-started like a chia pet.

[@Lestaticate]

I'm just face palming at OP for SCOLDING his sister for DEFENDING him, INVITED that she-devil back to his place, allowed said demon to verbally abuse his sister before FINALLY breaking up, then he actually KISSED and HUGGED that witch goodbye .... but not before considering having a FRIENDSHIP with her?! "Boohoo, I talked about your nethers and private life for ha-has, get over it! You’ll never find anyone else who will accept a loser like you! ... So, wanna be frieeeeeeends???" -- (WTF?) I mean glad he cut her off, but MAN OP's passiveness is enraging and his sister has horrible taste in friends. I REALLY hope OP works on his spine and lack of self respect.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@vanzy01]

💯👍🏿

[@lovelywolv]

Story 2: He's still calling her a girlfriend and not his ex. I think it's crazy he started arguing with his sister rather than defending her. He just let his ex call her a bitch to his face and didn't say anything really. She told him when his ex was taking shit about him but he won't do the same. I need to look at how old they are again

[@jackspring7709]

He's pathetic. Absolutely pathetic - he deserves his girlfriend, he doesn't deserve his sister.

[@shells500tutubo]

I did the same, 20 and I think his sister is maybe 21 or 22.

[@Azulakayes]

That's why I don't share any friends with my brother. He is 2 years younger but I don't involve myself with him socially. The same thing happened years ago, between him and our cousin(F, same age) and he went ahead and defended his cheating ex and insulted our cousin. I realised he is an idiot and I would never bother with his 'love problems'. If he has issues, I just give a generic excuse and tell him to talk to our older sisters. We have 3 so he can chose any of them but not me. My cousin also stopped being friends with him.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@michamocha]

Story 2: Op is infuriating. He pushed for his sister to tell him but then blew up at her for it? I feel bad for the sister. She was only doing the right thing for her sibling and he decided to shoot the messenger instead of addressing his girlfriend.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@AndyyWithAY]

It is 2024, why are we still acting like being a virgin in your early 20s is some morally reprehensible failing

[@PhonyFox_A]

Was it even like that before?

[@LovesGaming37]

It was never that way in the past. You are just grasping for straws and failing at it

[@fluidwolf]

@@LovesGaming37 Uh.....you are aware that people have chided people for being virgins for decades at this point, right? The exact thing they mentioned has happened and in fact STILL happens to this very day.

[@lindtplease1693]

It's weird either way. Being a virgin doesn't equate to moral superiority, nor does not being a virgin equate to some sort of defect.

[@alsatful]

@@thecursed01 I am 60 and everyone laughed at 20 something old virgin men in the 70s and 80s...... but now I think is a sign of strength I didnt have

[@gngrblls2thwall]

S1: "we hope her bio mom would never be that much of a monster" - you already know that she is that much of a monster

[@Carimars]

2nd story: the op should look into therapy because the fact the he didn’t understand that his sister was upset for him and didn’t regret what she did, and he’s questioning why??? Dude obvi she truly loves you

[@mbyerly9680]

He's really young and inexperienced in more than just sex.

[@messinalyle4030]

Made me wonder if he was neurodivergent and/or had been really sheltered for some reason.

[@akkiko]

I was wondering if someone mentioned that. Like he can’t understand why she was so upset? Does he not understand familial love? But no, the answer is just that he doesn’t love his sister.

[@messinalyle4030]

@@akkiko Doesn't mean that he doesn't love his sister. "Neurodivergent" doesn't mean "can't feel love." It means they process things different ways, and it might mean they have difficulty *showing* love, depending on the individual. But we neurodivergent folks aren't de facto heartless. That myth should have been put to rest yesterday.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@pasalking7760]

Story 2 Op really pissed me off. Imagine going off on your sister and be this spineless against your gf. He literally is a looser.

[@madambutterfly1997]

I appreciate OP clarifying that her relationship with her husband was not rooted in an affair

[@immapotato1]

I mean knowing reddit that's always 90% of the comments regardless of the question when second marriage is involved

[@justinebidulopoutchini9774]

At first i thought op baby trapped him 😅

[@tammymartinez7488]

Yup! Reddit would jumped to conclusions and said “you wrecked her family”

[@veezopolis]

I think it was incredibly unnecessary as its not anyone's business

[@venusbleu5764]

Thought I was the only one thinking this. It had nothing to do with the issue at hand

[@rodolfoleon4538]

Story 1:glad she told him because now it can be used in a custody case incase he tries to file for full custody Story 2: I feel sorry for the sister because she not only lost all her friends but her family aswell. Let’s not forget that he didn’t even stand up for her and only pitied her after a week after the incident of the break up.

[@marshawargo7238]

IDK Y they would throw out the diary away😮! I would have put it in a safety deposit box for safe keeping😊!

[@atomicranks2371]

Genuinely insane how he forces his sister to tell him what was said and then immediately gets upset with her because she told him.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@thefallennero5265]

Story 2: I feel conflicted about OP. He pesters his sister into telling him what his gf said about him but then becomes angry at his sister for telling him what was said to the point his sister calls him an effing idiot. Dude was directing his anger towards someone that was hesitant to tell him in the first place but also couldn't figure out why she angry at the gossip too until the comment section pointed it out for him.

[@Burnsy12]

He definitely comes off as a piece of garbage.

[@meirin5316]

he aint too bright...

[@anxnymous_bodies]

Yeah. He was an idiot for most of that story

[@ReformingRegent]

After the way he treated his sister, I feel no sympathy for op. If that’s how he treats people who on his side, then he deserves to be miserable. Fuck that guy.

[@dandotvid]

The worst part was he brought that POS back to his house. I was screaming "What are you doing, you idiot!!!"

[@geminigenu]

OP should have defended his sister instead of allowing GF to give her a verbal thrashing. Why would he wants to be friends with his horrible ex? I wouldn’t want anything to do with her after the way she spoke to OP’s sibling. OP is a pushover and an utter doormat.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@ettinakitten5047]

Story 2 I completely understand the sister. If my brother had a gf and I heard her bodyshaming him and oversharing about his sexual features behind his back, I'd be furious too. And also personally violated because I do *not* need to know that kind of stuff about my own brother. Update: OP is a shitty brother and I feel so bad for his sister. Hopefully he learns from this.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@RJ-sb5qr]

Story 2: OP YTA for treating your sister the way you did. You pestered her to tell you and when she does you get mad at her. Your sister loves you and was hurt for you and you treat her like crap. Now your girlfriend is definitely the AH. GF had no right to discuss your intimate relationship with her friends. Your gf needs to be in question about her true feelings for you. She's an insensitive AH. Instead of being sensitive to your inexperience she bashed you. There is nothing wrong with your appearance or inexperience. I think you should rethink your relationship with this girl. You deserve better.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@kp2223]

OP 2 YTA. He does not know how to value loyalty

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@velentr]

Honestly, it sounds like 'empathy' and 'social dynamics'in general are complete mysteries to him.

[@AnnMegFair]

Congrats OP in story 2, you insured that your sister will not tell you anything anymore now she knows you won't have her back when she suffers for standing up for you.

[@Floratic]

Story 2: Yeah, if I found out my S.O. was shit talking me about being a virgin or anything else is a automatic deal breaker.

[@millicentspears]

Story 2 team sister all the way

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@nymeroe]

That last story I'm sure the gf wouldn't see it as harmless gossip if the bf was talking with his male friends and criticising her lady parts as looking weird.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@Ken17-b8g]

I was thinking the exact same thing. It’s all fun and games until it happens to her. Very easy to dismiss the other person’s feelings but if you turned that around at them then it’s wrong? Hahaha wow:

[@akl2k7]

No kidding. Women hate when us guys gossip about them, but it's okay for them to do it? Double standards are ridiculous.

[@ida6950]

​@akl2k7 No, it's never ok. This isn't a men vs. women thing, it's an aholes vs. decent people thing.

[@coreydorsey4121]

OP in story 2 is a complete idiot. 1. Asked his sister to tell him, then got angry at her for looking out for him. 2. Did nothing to shield his sister as the source. 3. Brought the GF to his house and didn't consider she might attack his sister about telling him. 4. Allowed GF to manipulate him when confronting him. 5. Allowed GF to disrespect his sister in their house. 6. Just end it in the first place after finding out what the GF said and instead did the dumb "confrontation" thing which opens the door to all kinds of manipulation and unhinged behaviors.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@vanzy01]

💯👍🏿

[@cnow82]

Story 2: dude. Grow an effing spine! He is not mature enough to date or have sex. He needs to get some confidence before dating. His gf treated him like crap. And he didn’t stick up for his sis. And maybe they can be friends?! WTF?! Ugh. A doormat.

[@carolroberts4614]

He is a bit of a dimwit!

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@vanzy01]

💯👍🏿

[@JasperCatProductions]

Story 2 good grief , you pestered your sister (who listened to a bunch crap about her brother, it must have creeped her out) to tell you what happened, why you asking why she told you? You asked she told you now deal with your awful girlfriend.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@Daaaanielle]

OP 2.... Damn, I had to look up the ages again. He is 20 years old and can't handle conflict to save his life. Went out with her sisters close friend. Pestered the sister, got mad when she told him. Confronted the GF and then kept her around. Why couldn't he just break up with her without malking such a mess? what an idiot.

[@IvanaIka-lb5py]

HE'S 20!!?? He's not a teen?🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

[@Dragonemperess]

S2: OP doesn't deserve his sister, WTF!? Edit: A bit better, but he still has some making up to do.

[@Broeckchen]

OP: "I don't get why my sister cares so much about my gf insulting me behind my back." OP when his gf insults his sis behind her back: "HOW DARE YOU, THAT'S MY SISTER!!"

[@Ken17-b8g]

Hahahaha right??

[@clarrie93]

F.. i hate op in the story 2. HE was the one who asked his sister about it. And then got mad because his sister answered him. Tf. F. He deserved that pos girlfriend. Grow tf up

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@thewanderingronin5433]

Story 2: I'm glad OP and his sister worked things out, and he dumped his garbage ex. My twin sister and I aren't the closest, but I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt we'd throw hands if someone bad mouthed either one of us

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@greenbeacon394]

One common thread in Reddit stories is bad stuff seems to happen after drinking. No one on here after a night of drinking has fix their lawnmower, built a house, cured cancer, or solve world peace. Just throwing that out there

[@justaperson4656]

I mean, nobody has cured cancer sober either

[@carolroberts4614]

Might be a good idea to stay away from.that lawnmower when you're drunk. No good would come of it!

[@Broeckchen]

People get uninhibited when drunk, so it brings out a lot of... stuff. And some people really don't know their limits. I'm lucky to just be an affectionate drunk type and have this weird thing where I physically can't drink alcohol past a certain point anymore. The most drunk I've ever gotten made me just crawl into bed, stubbornly refusing even a single drop more. But several people I know just keep going and going, often until they throw up? Super confusing to me. I gotta say though, all my friends are peaceful and sweet even while drunk. Makes me feel extra safe with them. ♡

[@Draggonny]

My husband apparently walks people home, puts them to bed and rolls them into the recovery position when he's drunk. He's rescued at least 2 people from alcohol poisoning by calling them ambulances while on nights out. Dad-friend energy doesn't stop because he's had a drink or six.

[@TheArnaa]

Story 1: however bad the truth is, it’s never worse than being lied to. I’m glad OP told him.

[@kirksnowden8023]

So is privacy dead or your just ok with what is an expectation of privacy of private thoughts. Also if the guy feels guilty or at fault because his girlfriend got pregnant while on birth control he’s not very bright to begin with. But go on thinking your way. Not worth the drama.

[@lalvarez5151]

​@kirksnowden8023 the guy wasn't baby trapped. He didn't use protection. It's so messed up everyone puts this "baby trapping" on the mom when the dad is to blame as well. And everyone glosses over the fact Op went to read someone's full diary. Op is disgusting and as crazy as the ex

[@LeisureLizard]

I can’t believe story 2 involved adults over the age of 20. 🤦🏻‍♀️ I didn’t hear the beginning and assumed the whole bunch were 16 at most.

[@19nmiller1]

Story 2: As a girl, I can confirm that I don't ever make fun of my boyfriend with my friends or even really talk about our bedroom life. Also, OP really sucks. He treated his sister like garbage and let his girlfriend terrorize her when she was just looking out for her brother. Im glad hes trying to make it up to her, but hes still a spineless coward who doesn't deserve a sister as amazing as that.

[@One.DeSanctis.]

Paused @27:35 OP does not see that his Ex-GF is a terrible, mean human. He should most likely try to actually like the women he decides to date in the future. Never eff your siblings friends. It is "shitting where you eat." Unless they will never ever break-up and have hurt feelings. Gross.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@DiscoTimelordASD]

Story2: OP dragged his sister into it & let her be abused by him & the ex. What a piece of work!

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@Daydream_N]

Story 2: the gf is in the wrong purely for divulging into her sex life with her boyfriends sister. That's fucking weird and gross?

[@Boydswan]

Story 2: i wish my brother was like this. like at least he had empathy for her. she sounds like such a sweet girl, and he realized how much she sacrificed for him and he empathized with her and really realized how much he messed up. such a sweet sibling bond honestly. drag him all u want, but he really empathised with her

[@annabethsmith-kingsley2079]

Is the second guy asking why his sister cares about him?!

[@madambutterfly1997]

Baby trapping is just so cliché and pathetic

[@faeriefire78]

I wonder how chill the girlfriend in #2 would be if she found out her BF was telling the guys at bros night or whatever that she has one nipple that faces the floor, uses too much teeth, and lies like a corpse in bed. Something tells me she wouldn't appreciate a sarcastic "aww" face and fake apology from OP. OP was presented with a slew of deal-breakers, yet still considers keeping this harpy as a friend? The sister is the only person I don't want to throat punch in this story.

[@jackspring7709]

Story 2: Garbage girlfriend but OP's a major AH for pressing his sister to tell him what his GF had said....and then lashing out at his sister for finally telling him - and even blaming her. OP deserves his girlfriend, he doesn't deserve his sister, who was looking out for him. He's as much an AH as his gf is.

[@cthulhusmum86]

Story 2 - I think OP and his sister should make Fridays Sis & Bro night and make it a life long tradition!! Hugs to you and your Sis OP 🤗

[@ryanneburgess4482]

Story 2: so he blows up on his sister but kisses the gf goodbye when breaking up? His priorities are all the way skewed!

[@rebeccataylor2049]

Just give him ALL of the diaries!

[@ebbss4]

OP in S2 is such a damn loser

[@kristinewatson3702]

Story 2: the sister is the ONLY person that isn't the biggest AH EVER in this story. OP is the biggest pushover ever and I'm betting he's back sucking up to the ex GF in no time.

[@NopeScope14]

OP in story two has the backbone of an eclair

[@sidoniejordan-olsen7673]

It's gross that she talked about him sexually in front of his sister

[@v_doll]

Um. He let his girlfriend call his sister a bitch and then proceeded to "kiss and hug her one last time🥺"? BRO? Is he on drugs? He's been a god awful brother throughout the entire story and the lack of self reflection is insane. First he blows up at her for telling him what a bitch his girlfriend was, then he invites said girlfriend to their house WHILE HIS SITER IS THERE, let's her belittle and insult her only to then kiss and hug at the door? His sister deserves so much better than this.

[@Listrynne]

I think OP in story 1 needs to make sure hubby is in therapy and have therapist help tell him. He needs to know.

[@creidy2018]

That was my reaction too hahahaha glad during the update she mentioned he has a therapist so he has a professional to talk through it with as well as OP

[@browniewin4121]

1) Whatever was left belongs to the home owner, and especially since the X said she no longer had any interest in being given back her old possessions so I think OP not in the wrong to read and keep what was left. I did at first think there would be no benefit to telling her husband he had been baby-trapped, but considering how his X has been abusing him on this topic and lying to him I am thinking it would be a good idea to let him know. I would however not assume he won't ever say anything that might get back to his daughter and how hurtful that would be, so I think there should be discussion on that when this is revealed that he should just keep this info to himself and not reveal to his X he knows. After update: I am glad OP told him. It's good it will be a secret between the two of them and they are protecting the daughter from stumbling across it. It's good they are discussing this situation. 2) OP has a right to his feelings, and I think it was not the best for his girlfriend to reveal very personal things about OP and their relationship in such a way as to make fun of him. I'm glad OP's sister let him know this was happening. Shame on OP for criticizing his sister for telling him details after asking her to tell him, and for not recognizing how his sister is angry on his behalf because of this disrespect and betrayal by his girlfriend. YTA for anger misdirected and it is the girlfriend who did wrong, not his sister. PS, A dick that bends to one side is not abnormal. After update: I am sorry OP was harassing his sister and lashing out at her. Extra YTA. Yes, exactly "You F*ing idiot." At least he recognized that after the fact, and I'm glad he confronted his girlfriend and saw how much she discounts his feelings. It's good OP finally got a clue of how awful his girlfriend is, too bad it took him so long to say he was breaking up with her. First he abuses his sister and then lets the girlfriend do it. I hope he has learned a lesson and will do better going forward. I hope sis finds better friends in future, she is clearly depressed at the moment. I'm glad OP took her out for a nice dinner.

[@FanFicnic]

I so appreciate OP taking a minute to think over the pros and con of telling her husband. It’s clear she loves him dearly and is very thoughtful.

[@andrewi.crocker8675]

Story 2: Gotta love the girlfriend's logic of "it's totally not a big deal and you shouldn't be upset about it" but also the sister was a "total bitch for telling you." Like, wtf? How does that even make sense?!

[@katie6731]

OP1 sounds like an intelligent, thoughtful, reasonable person. I admire the way she handled the issue. It makes me feel sick to imagine telling my husband that he'd not only been manipulated and emotionally abused over a lie, but that he'd also been sexually assaulted. I wish the very best for OP, her husband, and their kids.

[@katharineeavan9705]

Yeah, it's actually a little weird how no one mentioned that "baby trapping" is SA. Like, no one (except manosphere incels) argues with the fact that "stealthing" is assault or that messing with or hiding someone's birth control is at bare minium abuse, so how is this different?

[@hmspretender]

Story 2: OP also sounds neuro-divergent, or just really really sheltered. His sister has every right to be angry with GF, she's actively making fun of her brother. OP is def not overreacting in the slightest.

[@indyfmw]

I agree I think it's an older story tho.

[@anxnymous_bodies]

Maybe. Does that excuse the fact that he let her insult his sister directly in front of him? Or that he still kissed her goodbye after all of that? I think that OP just lacked a spine and a brain. His sister deserves wayyy better

[@ashkim2628]

@@anxnymous_bodies Though you got to remember she was his first girlfriend and he isn’t going to handle it well. He did stick up for his sister, he did try to stop his ex from saying shit to his sister and most importantly he did apologize for miss placing his anger towards her. I do not know why everyone missed that. When she called his sister a bitch, he DID tell her to not talk like that about his sister. He DID try to stop them from fighting. He DID stand up for her. When they argued with each other he DID try to stand for his sister and get his ex to stop, all though we have no idea how loud both ladies were so he probably drowned out by the both of them. He also comforted his sister after his ex left and then later that Friday took her out to a new restaurant and they had a great time.

[@anxnymous_bodies]

@@ashkim2628 Dude, if he really wanted to, or if he really had the spine, he could have shut his ex up as soon as she started verbally attacking his sister. Or better yet, he could have kicked her out for disrespecting his family(unprovoked) right in front of him. It being his first relationship is _no_ excuse lmao. There are soooo many things he could have done

[@ashkim2628]

@@anxnymous_bodies I have been in his shoes, it may with an ex but when you are in the moment things that YOU should do GOES out the window. Trust me if she wanted to BE loud, she CAN and will get real loud. My mother is like that, you say thing to her and she flies off the handle and she will get louder than you. It is not that fucking easy. Plus gotta remember if he really did do what YOU wanted HIM to do, he would have been painted as the aggressor. Some people are just not quipped to handle being in that situation. Ain’t he fucking 20 years old?!? Girl! He ain’t that experience. This is a learning experience for him, he NOW knows what to look out for a few red flags. Geez y’all need to pump the brakes and realize, what you are all saying in the comments are easy to say but not that easy to actually do!! God damn, not everyone knows how to handle two women verbally at each others throats let alone an argument. Y’all make it sounds sooooo easy to shut it down like that but when you are in it, it’s not that easy for a lot of people. Stop shoving people in the same god damn box. Yes, he does need to grow a spine! I never said he didn’t need to. Y’all wanna look past that this IS his first relationship and break up! Not everyone is going to act the way YOU want them to

[@Bunny_Gee]

Story 2: Sisters are forever. Tramps come and go. Poor guy.

[@gannicusfinch7068]

OP's sister is a real one. Wish she had a better brother.

[@Saarman82]

Story 2 has to have one of the most dysfunctional family and mean girls dynamic I've heard about in forever. I've lost faith in humanity.

[@realotiswashington]

Story 1: I'm on OP's side 100% That said, I do take issue with what that one commenter was saying. "Most people are don't rock the boat chickenshits" If we lived in an ideal world, I would fully support this statement. But we don't live in an idea world. Acting rashly could in some cases spell life, death, or disaster for one or more parties involved.

[@ashh4929]

For real, and I can't believe people are acting like she's wanting to say something out of spite. Like you said, if things are presented wrong, it could upend both their lives and if she wanted to tell him out out spite, she wouldn't have come to reddit to see how to break something this big to him. This is a damned if you do, damned if you don't scenario. I'm glad they seem like they can move past this.

[@kirksnowden8023]

Story 2 - Brother is a simp tool who created so much drama for his sis. He truly sucks with his insecurities.

[@loganjoh1]

OP 2 has something wrong with him. The fact he was wondering why his sister would get angry about his ex saying that stuff about him and being confused by it and not thinking “hey maybe my sister actually loves me because we are family” then he pesters her for info then yells at her asking why she told him the information he wouldn’t leave her alone about. He is an adult he needs to act like one.

[@impagain]

God, the girlfriend in story 2. Bullies, berates, and screams at OP's sister, and then can't understand why he could possibly break up with her. Wild.

[@sksunshine4860]

I'm glad OP told him but they need to sit her down when she gets older and explain that you adore her but don't want her mom to weaponize or shade how she came to be so you are including her in the facts that you have learned. This is not to turn her against her mom but people like this tend to try the guilt trip throughout their lives. She should be prepared in case her mom decides she's the next guilt pawn so that she knows this was her mother's plan and can push it back on her. Her mom is still in regular contact and there is no way of knowing what is said when she's with her.

[@sam2x13]

Story #1. I would have made sure that both sets of grandparents would have known about what that woman did. But make sure they understand that that child is loved unconditionally regardless.

[@DaniS398]

Op and his sister are adorable. No one reacts the correctvway 100% of the time, especially when big feelings are involved. In the end, they chose each other and grew from the experience.

[@kateemma22]

'I get weirder every day' same, Mark, same.

[@Songbirdstress]

The truth will set you free. Both need to know. The daughter at an age appropriate time. She also needs to know what kind of person her mother is for her own protection.

[@Iflie]

"She's always acting so moral" Yeah, because she has them unlike that slag of a girlfriend and i guess the rest of that group. Even if girls discuss their sexlife to close friends you'd never do that in front of his sister and be so mean about it. Too bad OP can't date his sister because she's the type of woman he needs, a spine and good sense.

[@BabyNazarath]

Story #1: he will find out anyways. I think this is something that needs to be said because OP doesn't need to hide other people's nasty secrets. She snooped and she can apologize for that, but thats it. Please let your husband know

[@DirtyUncleSAL]

The OP actually has nothing to apologize for at all. When the ex told them they should throw everything away, anything else became garbage. The OP then found the ex wife's notebook confessions, in a box of "trash" while cleaning HER house. Thats not snooping.

[@fiyahquacker2835]

​@@DirtyUncleSALwhile yes yhe op has nothing to apologize for the op absolutely was snooping. The op themselves said they were being nosy and if you google "synonyms for nosy" you'll quickly find snooping among them.

[@akl2k7]

@@fiyahquacker2835 Oh well. Maybe the ex should have grabbed all her stuff when she left in the first place.

[@lalvarez5151]

The Op invaded someone's privacy and read someone's full diary. She has deep issues as well. She then HAD to tell her husband the gossip she found because that would TOTALLY make the situation better right? NO...SHE made it worse

[@hannahjanis8616]

Story 2 OP reminds me of myself in the first relationship I had. Not enough life experience to know when to make a stand and when to look inwards for the problem. I hope this experience helps him make stronger decisions in the future. He seems like a good dude, just inexperienced.

[@crem-crem4070]

20:45 story 2: I’m starting to think op DESERVES this horrible gf if THIS is how he treats his sister

[@PassiveSmoking]

First story: I'm glad that OP did the right thing, though Reddit deserves a bit of credit too for giving her the push she needed. As ever, communication is what separates the relationships that are going to last from the ones that aren't. I think in her position, I'd have sat my SO down and told them, "I've found this diary that your ex left behind, and they wrote something in it regarding the child you had with them that you're not going to like, but which I also think you have a right to know. If you don't want to know I can destroy the diary without showing it to you, but if you do then here it is, and I'll be here to support you whatever you decide. What do you want me to do?"

[@ZomBeeQueeen]

Story 2: That bend…had been magical every time I’ve ran into one 😂

[@rayradiant1828]

I could never be around someone who spoke about my sisters that way. Absolutely disgusting.

[@MsUnamusedNerd]

STORY 2: GF is trash. If BF talked about how she’s not tight or her breasts are tiny she would not appreciate a dismissive response from her partner, if the roles were switched

[@rebeccataylor2049]

I just found this while I was cleaning out the attic. Would you please take a look at it. And then just give it to him.

[@kyanshi]

story 2: OP should have had a nice long talk that it was highly inappropriate for his GF to talk about his sex life *_IN FRONT OF HIS SISTER!!!_*

[@rclark8688]

Story 2: I'm glad OP is finally starting to treat his sister better, but his initial treatment and lack of care towards her was honestly alarming. I get blowing up at someone, but he not only showed a complete lack of basic empathy toward her, but continually chased her down and harassed her. I don't know if its because of being around his ex or some sort of neurodivergence, but his lack of understanding and towards his sister is very concerning in my opinion.

[@Soggy_Donut_Holz]

Last story: the brother and sister are definitely fucking each other. 🤣🤣🤣 I bet this story took place in the Deep South. You can hear the banjos playing! 🤣🤣🤣

[@stephaniesomer5934]

Ugh gross….i hate when people in a relationship kiss and tell…I hate when people pry and try to get people in a relationship to kiss and tell. Tacky. 🤗❤️🇺🇸

[@lina9535]

When insomnia hits, and Mark uploads a video, all is good in the sleepless world

[@carolroberts4614]

I feel like that sometimes! It's nearly midnight here in the UK, but I will often be reading Mark's stories at 2 a.m.

[@carolroberts4614]

Update, here I am at 3 a.m.!

[@lina9535]

I'm 1 hour ahead of you then, provided I can math correctly (I'm in Sweden, so 1 timezone over from the UK). I was tossing and turning until around 3:30 😅😂

[@alenasenie6928]

Story 2: the sister also dodge a bullet, with those friends, who would need enemies, those are the kind of women that say "men are all the same" without noticing how they are the problem, that their "gossip" is demeaning, and that talking behind someone is a huge break of trust, how would anyone trust people when they discover they are like that? There is no relationship that would survive that, I wouldn't be with someone that talks behind someone's back, or at least not someone they act as friends, someone they choose to be with, I could make the exception about people they are forced to interact and that they have to put a friendly face for the sake of their environment, like a coworker, and that is my line, only if it is about needing to take out their anger or frustration, not for gossip.

[@TheAlphaDingo]

OP2 sucks, he doesn't deserve his sister. At least he finally saw how toxic his ex and the friends were but don't keep her as a friend.

[@ljh5141]

In the last story, sister is a true and lovely person. That girlfriend is a gossipy mean girl and has no respect for OP. I wouldn’t dream of craptalking my BF/ spouse like that. Intimate details are just that, intimate! She spewed venomous detail about extremely private details about what was supposed to be her special person and made him a spectacle to be laughed about. So happy that his fabulous sister was the absolute right kind of shit stirrer and through the crap right back at “mean girl girl friend”. What a POS that girl is. I hope that dinner was scrumptious and that they both go on to find new friends and special people in their lives and keep on having each other’s backs.❤❤

[@d.delgado4585]

Story 2 - the girlfriend got off easy. If my brother’s girlfriend had been talking crap about him that way, I would have laid all her shit out. But honestly her brother did almost nothing to have his sister’s back.

[@hilarymurray8741]

BFs first time story : That situation was special and should have been precious to the GF if she had had any regard for her BF. Not something to be discussed with anyone else, but a secret to be valued.

[@harvestkitty]

Story 2, if it had been the other way, where the boyfriend talked that way about her, it would have been viewed very differently. It's sad that people are trashing on him for lashing out in his confusion and anger, he knew he messed up with his sister, and felt genuinely bad about it. That girlfriend is absolute trash.

[@ondank]

OP is actually pathetic. He takes the option that causes the most harm to himself and everyone around him. Absolutely needs to grow up.

[@jakemarie828]

Love your Yogi Bear impression ❤

[@taylorslade961]

Story 1: I would be questioning a lot of shit here. Why did the ex leave the way she did? Leaving behind old journals and family heirlooms isn't something most people do easily so what was going on that she left like that? I did it when I ran from my abusive ex and my severely mentally ill ex-roommate did it because the rest of the roommates were forcing her to take responsibility for the problems she was causing. Two extreme situations. So what was the extreme situation that the ex was in that she felt the need to leave behind so much? There are three sides to every story, your side, my side, and the truth.

[@katharineeavan9705]

I mean, she straight up admits to sexually assaulting him to force him to stay with her in her own journal. Regardless of what else may or may not have happened, the ex is very clearly a messed up person. We can only judge the facts with which we've been presented, and not even the ex herself or her own journal has made any claim or even suggestion that anyone else besides her did anything wrong or harmful.

[@976toya]

"I swear I'm getting weirder everyday." Me too, Mark. Me too. 😂

[@olgar.6604]

Story 2: you can tell that op is in a relationship where he constantly gets gaslit and has his feelings dismissed. Heck, he knew what his gf's reaction would be : to dismiss her oversharing as something all girls do and something that op can't get mad over. Nevermind the lack of respect, that dynamic alone is eating at op's self-confidence/sanity. The sister is the mvp in this story.

[@kaynerandolph432]

First story, the little girl will figure it out. She'll realize that her egg donor is a manipulator and weaponizes guilt. She'll then realize that she was convinced before marriage and the stories her mom will tell. Though, this will be less painful

[@Kihara.Sedai47]

Man I feel bad for OP in story 2. For me it wouldn't be the talking about those sex life that's the problem. It's the looking down at OP and making fun of him that is so awful.

[@unicorn12345]

Story 2: OP doesn’t deserve his sister, and he honestly exhausted any sympathy I had for him for the way he behaved.

[@melindaflick631]

Story 2 - I think OP sounds like a bit of a late bloomer. Hadn't had sex before. First girlfriend. You're still learning at that stage of life. Learning how to grow up and be a mature stand up person, and importantly - what shit to not put up with. His sister is. He's on his way, it sounds like. Yeah, he let the ex go on too much, both to himself and to his sister. But he DID stop her, and he DID break up with her. He'll up his game in the future. He's not bad, he's just a work in progress!