I don’t feel real

[@neilsthompson589]

You're Real. You're Authentic. You Make A Difference. Be kind To Yourself Buddy. Blessings.

[@noahcd38]

saying “you’re real” to someone who possibly has Depersonalization / Derealization won’t help btw (no hate)

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@darrenthomas4261]

​@@mxttthxwhelp you ❤ my boyfriend date you Like you

[@mxttthxw]

I hope everyone is doing well. Stay positive yall

[@princessantgaming]

great job for not giving up on what you love, Have an amazing day and as you said, "Stay positive" :)

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much stay positive🖤

[@MM-br4km]

All is well here Matthew. Thanks for the thought and hope same for you. 🤩

[@princessantgaming]

@@mxttthxw It's just the facts :)

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@briankiefer856]

You’ve brilliantly described what is known as a rut….Stop living to the objectives of others, and start living to the desires that satisfy you. Chart your course, and defy the norms in which restricts your dreams.

[@rickjones8524]

Thank you for talking it out with people who care about what you have to say. Many people feel the same way. It's a tough time for alot of us right now. Stay strong and know you are not alone. ❤

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@calvarydominique]

Very relatable and honest! Thank you for sharing your light and ideas and feelings with the world‼️

[@mxttthxw]

appreciate you my guy

[@vdgitaliano]

I felt this way my whole life and many of the things you say are like I said it myself. Your story IS my life. You may want to get tested for autism. At my age I thought it was pointless, but did it anyway. When I found out I am on the spectrum, so many things became clear, and for the first time I feel as though I can regain control easier and faster when these emotional times rise up in my life. I totally relate with you on every level.

[@adamjd3293]

I'm 26 and everything you've said I have been feeling for a few years now. I feel like I haven't done much with my life and turning 30 scares me because I won't get my 20s back which are supposed to be your prime years. I have been getting in contact with old friends recently and trying to go out more but it is hard because they have busy lives and making new friends is hard as an adult. What I have found that makes it slightly easier is taking things one day at a time and appreciating the little things in life.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much for this post. I really appreciate you. We will get through this.

[@МихайлоТисак-т5я]

God bless you my dearest brother

[@TheAnthonyjames]

I'm in my sixties and can safely say...all the years are your prime. Most successful people don't attain it till their in their fifties. Don't hold back...carpe diem.

[@OCD-GIRL]

I appreciate your honesty, you are very good with words, don't give up, keep fighting.

[@mxttthxw]

🖤🖤

[@biclight2007]

Hi, Matthew. You are speaking some big truths in this video. And don't think you are lacking something or are weak or you are a failure. Life is hard, living is hard. Time or age doesn't make these feelings go away. To me, it seems that the ego drives those fears. It wants to keep us in a state of fear, where we think we need it to keep us safe. But it is all lies. Find a way to stop believing the lies of your ego. You don't need them. And, if you can tune them out or find a way to accept them for what they are, you can start moving forward with so much greater a sense of peace. To me, meditating, usually before bed time, has helped me a lot. A good series of guided meditations that I have used are from The Conscious Spirit podcast, titled Fred's Meds. You may consider trying one or a few to see if they help, if you are so inclined. It can get better. Though you are doing a good job of figuring a lot of things out already.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you sm for this

[@biclight2007]

@@mxttthxw You are very welcome. It takes a while, but it does get easier (though there will always be rough patches). There are a lot of us going through something similar, so there are also lots of support groups and options. I would encourage you to look for some and see if any seem like they may be a good option for you. Just remember that you can reach out to all of us whenever you want to.

[@LeonorWC]

Very relatable. Feels so nice to see someone else talk about the way you've been feeling too Im loving these videos 👍

[@mxttthxw]

Thank you sm

[@robertraystevens]

Sucks you're going through this. It's good you've made this video; keep it up and I'll tune in again. I appreciate you for your honesty.

[@drewspods]

I use to feel exactly this when I was a teenager. I still do occasionally. But much more when I was a teenager, like unbearably then. Which it sounds like you're kind of in that place. You just have to ride it out & keep going until you're out of it. I think finally being out of school & shaping your life how you want it as an adult is what helps. Because as a teenager you're still essentially living the life your parents & different authorities in your life want you to live so it feels inauthentic to you. Because it isn't really you. I love your heart in sharing this! Its so real how you start with saying "you" instead of I. I do that sometimes too. It feels easier to deflect what you're feeling on to a larger group instead of owning it. But you did own it eventually. And thats brave. Thank you for your courage to be your whole/true self openly. You're brave. And you're not alone with how you feel. I have at times felt like I was outside of what was happening or just like disconnected/disassociated from reality.

[@mxttthxw]

dude, this comment really helped me. I really appreciate you and what you had to say. Thank you so much, my man.🖤

[@tylerhaynes8546]

I love how you talk and think, bro. You're deep, and I can relate wit that. I've always been a thinker, often too much and too deep a thinker. And I over analyze everything! Ive gotten better with age at handling it, but I still always second guess myself and pretty often feel like an innocent, unconfident kid still at 40. I used to literally give myself panic attacks over thinking too deeply about myself, existence, god, if there's a god, the universe, bro you name it. I once feared existence itself and wonder why? Like Why all this, what's the point? Sometimes i feel like we're all in a fucking simulation....and hell yeah time is FLYING something fierce! More than ever, this year i feel like it's almost impossible to find 5 minutes to just collect myself and ground and just be, yfm? Take care and try not to overthink everything, my boy. Stay cool, stay you..

[@mxttthxw]

I love this comment, my man thank you so much. I feel like I really needed to hear it. I hope you are enjoying yourself.🖤

[@tylerhaynes8546]

@@mxttthxw Thank you, I'm glad you needed it. Thanks for letting me open up as well 🖤

[@lightbulbcasto1997]

Thank you for sharing this. I’ve had some similar struggles of worries and fear of uncertainty, but what I would like to share is that sometimes what you can do is to just live in the moment and embrace the uncertainty, you can simply recognise that those are just thoughts and may not be the truth. As humans, we simply don’t have the ability to predict the future and what we can do is to only do what’s right for our next step. Stay positive and in the moment, everything will have a way of working out.

[@gothicshadowstgg]

You have more in common with most people than you think. This is a hard world, you have to do the best you can. I hope you are on good terms with your family. I am not, they are totally dysfunctional. You are much too hard on yourself. You are not worthless. You are honest, caring, smart and awesome. We see it and you have to see that in yourself. Say it to yourself, until you believe it. Best wishes always, Tim G.

[@cantneygessner691]

I am sad, too. I went to a far away planet at 19 as my occupation of nothingness. But the wind blew over the cold chill of the Pacific waters and gave me warmth when I believed a rose would form. And so I kept her in this glass jar while I took to a kite to find my fox in the never-ending planets I visited, in this faint rush, to escape her hotdog cutting scissors.

[@tbecon]

You communicated your feelings very well and you listed many of the "solutions" very well also, pain and hope at the same time. I hope you find peace and learn to accept yourself as enough and moderate your expectations to allow you to see yourself in a positive light. I bet there are people who see you very positively, I hope you can see yourself the way they do.

[@Sneaks_2006]

You are real in my heart brother 🖤

[@mxttthxw]

Thank you sm sneaks🖤

[@reyjusuf]

It's funny that Die With a Smile was released earlier this year. That song is just so fitting to what I feel about the world right now. It feels like things are falling apart. All you can do is be with your loved ones and hug them every night, because tomorrow is not promised.

[@mxttthxw]

this is so real

[@jrcash7546]

Matthew you are a remarkable young man. More than you know or can appreciate right now. The fact that you keep reflecting and asking about the meaning of life and your place in the world says a lot about you. Even if you cannot appreciate that right now. Believe it or not, we all struggle with the same questions you are right now. Even me many years ahead of you still do. And one thing I have realised is that we want it all now, or yesterday, but we need to be patient. Keep showing up as you say. That is something. It exposes you to experiences in life. And I would also encourage you to start shaping your views in the first person rather than the third. I can tell you mean yourself, but often you speak as though you are giving words of wisdom to another that you have yet to possess or experience yourself. The vulnerability in your life journey is actually quite appealing. More than you can know. You inspire those like me by keeping the flame alive. And in those your age you will inspire them to think differently when they may be caught in the daze of.... social media, gaming, addiction, etc.

[@mikhaillazcarro8879]

All you described it’s call existential crisis… and what you told us, on some time of our lives we experienced. Knowing that one day we’ll all die… and everything was an elution make us feel nostalgic. Just think that is the reality of life… and keep going.. give love to everyone and keep going., my love for you and everyone. Have a great day.

[@childof70s1]

You are worth more than you know. Every human being and every human soul by itself is worth more than the whole world because the human soul is eternal. You are real and extremely valuable and tell yourself that when your internal dialogue tries to make you doubt your value. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself. I can actually relate to the things you said in your video. I'm a number of years older than you and when I was in my 20s back in the 90s, I began to experience severe anxiety, panic attacks, generalized anxiety and depression but eventually I learned to cope with it even though every now and then if I over worry it tries to rarely rear its ugly head, but it eventually passes. Keep your chin up and I hope this helps.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you sm for this

[@Official-TobiFilms]

Praise the Lord 🙏 keep your mind safe.

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@robertjamison6044]

You are worth and blessed. Don't let your worries or fears get a hold on you, so stay positive and peaceful

[@mxttthxw]

[@edjopago1]

Matthew......reflecting on life is indeed a powerful exercise for growth and self-awareness. It's like gardening; you plant the seeds of goals and nurture them with actions and priorities. Overthinking, however, can be the weeds that stifle growth. It's important to clear those away and let the garden of your potential flourish. Embrace the journey, water your aspirations with determination, and watch as your life blossoms into something truly remarkable. Life is an adventure meant to be lived, not overthought. So, take a deep breath, and dive into the experiences that await you!

[@pizzacrust7029]

Feel it man. Probably similar age to you. Words can’t totally describe the feeling. I try writing about how I’m feeling and it kinda helps but it’s a struggle. I can write down the exact steps I need to take to improve, but damn is putting shit to practice so hard. Reflecting is better than ignoring the feeling I think. I figure if I keep thinking about the right steps to take then eventually it’ll reach the subconscious and I’ll start really improving and be consistent. Stay up bro, life gives you the obstacles it needs for you to grow, the answer is you, I believe you gotta look in yourself for the answers. The outside world is noise

[@mxttthxw]

i feel you my man thank you

[@KeithAlmond-j7r]

Matt,I’ve just watched your past videos and, your doing much better than you were a few days ago. You shouldn’t be thinking that far ahead. Your over thinking thing’s. I’m on line usually all day so anytime you want to talk I’m here for you.Best wishes! Keith.

[@Whatsthedealsquirter]

I understand what your going through,been thru it aswell its pretty common,all i can say is value yourself,the people who raised you love and value you, respect yourself you are worth it ,have patience with yourself nothing worth a damn ever comes easy,you are in control of your future,live in strides because everyone says life goes quick but for some of us is a long dragging grueling mother-fer,Relax bud ,take time to smile, measure your success in happiness,not material gains,you cant take anything material with us where were all headed,dont compair yourself to anyone else or their current situation,lastly RELAX ,your young enjoy your youth dont be so serious, personally i would strive for more human interaction, nothing wrong with having one good friend, quality people are hard to find sometimes,best wishes young fella 😊

[@donnaanderson7954]

Matthew I've decided that you are an old soul (maybe it takes one to know one). But, YOU'RE not old. And I think you're worth more than you know. The road is long, but I think you have it in you to make the journey. My advice is to follow your gut and instinct and do what you must to get what you want, even if it goes against the conventional choices often expected of us. Take chances. Even if you fail, you will be glad you tried. If you try and fail, you won't regret that as much as you will if you look back 50 years from now and see that you didn't. Don't wait.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much for this comment my guy you’re so right. I hope you are enjoying your week and everything is well. I am done waiting.

[@erik0073]

I agree with this comment! 👆 I think that you are an old soul as well as a young man. It doesn't always feel like it is a gift. But it is!!! It comes with a burden, but a big blessing is attached to it as well.

[@Mark-1111-]

one thing that stood out, while there were many actually as you bring up numerous valid points ... don't wait for something to come along to change you. you will set yourself up for failure. you must be the change you want to see in this world and you have to love yourself first and foremost, know that you're the only one you can rely on. once you get that down, life will become better for you and your decisions and energies will draw more positive outcomes. 🙏💫👍

[@mxttthxw]

I really love this comment my guy thank you so much

[@Mark-1111-]

@@mxttthxw you are most welcome and I hope and wish the best on your journey in this life 🙏💫

[@ArcaneAlmalgams]

Welcome to the club. Stay strong, be kind, have faith. Prepare for the werid

[@steventrosiek2623]

Nice personality and handsome. Very good communicator.

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@seangarcia5225]

Just came across this video due to the algorithm I’m currently in medical school but I’m not happy, I feel a lot of what you describe Some days I’m doing well passing my classes having a laugh with my friends and motivated to work others I feel dissociated like I see my actions but I’m not fully guiding them. I’m failing some classes and needing to retake exams (luckily haven’t had to repeat a whole year yet and the school is accommodating but we’ll see) Some days I’m trying to reach out to new adventures, new hobbies (dance, archery,…) and meet new people, make new friends, in an attempt to find that something I think I need I too want to live and have an idea of what I want to live (have the friends I want, the experiences I want, to do the good in the world that I want). But at the same time, since I’m not there, I am simply existing. I do my best when I can to exist productively but sometimes I just exist and have to deal with the consequences of relaxing/procrastinating/seeking new adventures when I should be studying All this is to say, life I complex. I’m in my late 20s and there’s so much I want to do and there’s so much I *have* done! But also so many times I can’t bring myself to find that reason to live life fully (maybe I am living fully but something isn’t allowing me to realize that). Thank you for this video. I’m sorry you feel how you feel. And I’m not saying how I feel is how you feel but something about how you described things feels so familiar to me. From one random stranger across the internet to another, I’m also wishing you the best in life, the best each day has to offer. And when days don’t feel like life, I wish you soon get back to days where you Are living. I think tonight I just need to exist and tomorrow will be a new day to try to do more. Bests to you in your journey and thank you for this brief connection

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much for this comment🖤

[@МихайлоТисак-т5я]

God bless you my dearest brother

[@Giga_Chad-sz3kc]

When I felt this way I turned to god. God helped me find hope and happiness. Find someone to love and loves you the same. God bless you and follow your dreams!❤

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@jasonreese4573]

I try to advise the lad that God is the answer, not sure if I'm getting through. (I get the black hearts too) WE LOVE YOU MICHAEL!

[@georgescott249]

Mathew don't think to hard.you have a pretty good life. I hope you can find you some really good people to spend time with ❤you deserve good friends ❤

[@mxttthxw]

thank you, my guy

[@mrtrth]

"And I don't want a never-ending life. I just wanna be alive while I'm here" ~ spirits, the strumbellas I hear you. Thanks for making this video.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you sm

[@rockeyrocket1224]

All I can say is when I was a lost teen what gave me some peace was accepting that hard times are the only thing you can count on. One wave knocks you down and you get up, twice down twice up and on it goes. Coffee in the morning but not after noon and take long walks to get outside your head. You are beautiful bro it would be a shame to end too soon.

[@victoriaminor1143]

I've been feeling this way too. I have to remind myself that as long as I stay true to myself and not to become something I'm not. 💜 But I can relate it's been pretty rough but 💪😭💪

[@mxttthxw]

thank you for this

[@richardrow3729]

Stay Positive. Live in gratitude. Train yourself to think better. Do better. You know it’s true.

[@mxttthxw]

stay positive your right my guy

[@dragonsteve69]

The friends and lovers you make along your journey are all that will matter in the end. Find a job you enjoy. Take the time to make memories with people. But always do things for yourself, and not because someone else wants you to do it. Unless they are your boss and paying you.

[@victoriaminor1143]

Deeper into video. Hitting everything..... spiritual warfare I've come to learn.

[@kimsanchannel3920]

Hello Matthew ✨️ First, Matthew, don't put your Self down, please don't do that There aren't answers to everything You are REAL. You are a beautiful Person inside and out , you can Achieve everything you want in Life, you are still a young man,you Will have the time. Think about what you are actually doing here Achieving for all of us watching Your videos. I just now that great Things will happen to you in life It will , please stay strong and have Faith 🌟 kim 🙆‍♂️

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much Kim. This message is very kind of you. I hope you are enjoying your week and having a great day. Stay positive.🖤

[@evan4192]

clicked on the title immediately cause this is how i felt when i was depressed, Rn I'm like happier than ever, just keep fighting i struggled w this feeling for like 3 years and pushing through it was so worth it

[@mxttthxw]

i’m so happy for you my guy keep moving on

[@stephenbeaty65]

You are young. It is difficult sometimes to get a bearing. Keep talking to us. Hopefully we can help. Don't give up on yourself.

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@mikethorn70]

Matt my friend you are enough. You are important. Let's start by celebrating the small things, they do matter. You opened your eyes, got out of bed, got dressed ( unless you sleep in your clothes) . . . . More to come I am listening

[@mxttthxw]

thank you sm my man

[@tessla9244]

Thank you for your video. Take your time. All the best 👍🏻😊

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@paulmoreno6279]

Awesome and amazing guy 💯

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@paulmoreno6279]

@@mxttthxw 💘 my #1 guy

[@charlesmento5968]

Joy is why, expansion is why, evolving is why, you can create more of your own reality

[@GB-je5tc]

Wow. You are definitely vibrating with intense emotion(s), my friend. I think like me, you are one of the extremely sensitive soul types. We feel EVERYTHING in life to the extreme, including the deep, sad parts... and that's not necessarily a bad thing, done in moderation, but it can be tiring. 😉 You are most coherent, articulate, and profound. I hope you can actually hear the wisdom that you are expressing in this video. The problem with problem solving is when emotion has taken full charge. Reduce the height of the emotional charge (at each moment), and that'll allow time for a smoither two-way dialog with yourself to take hold. Holding all emotion in "balance" is so difficult but is do-able. You will find this with practice. You hit the nail on the head with negative self-talk young fella. It matters, and it can hurt you deeply if you don't put it in check. You gotta learn to 🎉LOVE yourself, current faults, and all. Then you gotta love the very next version of you when that "you" comes along. You are enough, my friend!! You are EXACTLY who you need to be in this moment. You will eventually get to love and laugh at previous versions of you as you get older. Don't worry about making "mistakes." Otherwise, you'll rob yourself of key learning lessons. You'll see your perspectives change as you enter each new decade, TRUST me. 😊 Try to enjoy the beautiful journey, and don't overthink any rigid destinations... you'll rob yourself of the hidden mysteries along the way. PS// Research the Age of Aquarius. Your energy levels could be affected by the recent eclipses and new moon phases. Peace and positivity, young brother. 🫶🖖🫡🫡🌌💜🙏

[@peterpatrick620]

. . . I hear ya . . . listen to Phil Ochs "When I'm Gone" . . . stay positive . . . stay safe . . . keep looking

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@wildtropics5354]

There is indeed hope in even the most hopeless situations. There is One Hope that will never fail. I appreciate the chance to encourage you in Truth. Hmu if you need any support

[@TEJUS_667]

One thing that helped me with similar struggles was being taught that instead of trying to deny or push away or escape negative feelings, we can let ourselves feel them and then move on. It may sound overly simplistic but that has worked for me. When I start to feel sadness or anger my first instinct is to deny that, but I remind myself to allow it instead.

[@mxttthxw]

this is really sad, but there is some truth. Thank you so much for this post. I really appreciate it.

[@pauladam8918]

Everyone feels that way at one time or another in life .. things will pass , improve and get better stick it out I felt suicidal but I fought hard to get through it but things got better and I would have missed a lot of great times in life fight through it !!!

[@mxttthxw]

thank you sm my man

[@MM-br4km]

There's a movie called "Parenthood" where Steve Martin is a father. Sometime during the movie his father lightly slaps his hand on side Steve's face a couple times and says with a fatherly grin that is almost a smile and says, "you worry too much." 😎💙

[@mxttthxw]

love this

[@xxlobos3428]

Make a list to accomplish, not a list to save the world, but to make incremental steps. NOT the best, you're setting yourself up for failure if you want the BEST, but just what's doable & helpful. You can expand from there. Good luck!

[@Bellybear-s3s]

Time needs structure. In normal times i try to walk in foot steps of persons near mine. F.ex. Rosy time (sister) or grandpa time (he learns holding spoon and cup again)... Every month or longer has a special face. In free time i'm adrenaline junkie. New jumps when ice sliding, climbing (hall or free), roof-jumping...time feels always real, exciting & thrilling. Every year there are new experiences and lots of things to learn.

[@8004william]

Just enjoy your day by day every day is going to bring you good things and bad things and that's the way the life is for everybody just be happy and live the best of the best for your age I wish I was your age . I am already older and I'm still here with struggles but I'm still here.

[@Pimporly]

Nah I feel Bad this happen to me to as Handicap person sometime I think I'm living in a Dream nothing is real to me to. But na we need to live our lives the best we can until one they the real end come or better say the real Awaking it come. All Teenage a some point Experience this. You also Feel Depression of some type it can be a light one or a Deep one. All we can do is try to get out of it as best a we can. But I tell you something you worth a lot not even if you don't think so. There some people who need your Thoughts your help that what we are doing here all Humans Race. God Bless You Matthew. PS.. Yes Tomorrow is not Promise but what we have to do is live our lives the Best that we can Today and hope God give us another day tomorow

[@thomastarter781]

I am 72 years old and I was you when I was 17 with identical thoughts. I loved your post. You are very honest and real. The one thing missing in my early years were video games and social media, but all of your concerns are the same. It’s banal to say, but it’s life. You aren’t weak. Stay the course of your life. It gets so much better, especially when you choose a career, and one when you want to get up in the morning and go to work. Your question of why we are here will never go away for the rest of your life. I have found peace with it, mostly. Best wishes.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you sm for this

[@tomwestbrook]

Same here (66 myself), Jeez it was horrible, so I totally feel for Matthew. The good thing about all this suffering is that a person can convert it into care and compassion for others at some point not too far down the road and will lead you to a marvelous life. There's not really a higher goal in life to have than that. It's just the waiting & living thru it that's a bitch.

[@mxttthxw]

this is really real my guy thank you so much for this comment. I hope you’re enjoying yourself and hope things work out for both of us. Stay tuned.

[@Gene-f1j]

Like the previous comments, I too am an older man. When I was your age, I felt bullied, unappreciated, and wondered what was the purpose of this life. Luckily, I studied hard and have had a good career in life. The struggles you go through, help you have empathy and understanding for the troubles that other people go through. You may find your calling is to become a psychologist or a counselor or a minister. You're a very smart young man, keep working hard to be your best and know that Life will work out just fine for you. When you're feeling down, go out and enjoy the sun and the sky or the cool crisp nighttime air. We live on beautiful planet full of beautiful nature and things to explore. God bless you.

[@Steinweg100]

"Waiting to die" I hope you are no longer feeling this way. I AM waiting to die, whther I want to or not! I have stage four colorectal cancer, yet I smile! At least I am not a lad of your age, or younger! I am not wailing or gnashing my teeth! I get on because I can:) At the moment your bruises are healing, give yourself time. You have many wise people here and you are surrounded by love and empathy, especially your contemporaries! Some one here recommended breaking your patterns by being away from all things electronic! We humans 'get into a rut', round and round we go and, Somtimes we have to break that pattern, maybe just go out and take your 'phone, place it on mute, but is there as part of your comfort system in case you need help. Are you eating yet ? (I hate to sound patronising) Take eveything in bite size chunks, food and life! Are you using another part of your creativity (It does help at times) It's all about breaking patterns and making new ones, like good and bad memories! I kknow that creativity helps! You create these wonderful podcasts; you do not know how many people yu may be helping! In my way I believe that I helped ppl. (I was a pro pianist til several strokes and other thiings 'got in the way' ! I thought, If I could distract ppl from their hurt or just make happy, ppl who were, for example, going through what yuo are suffering! Like me, I thoroughly believe that you are a philosopher finding his way and I believe you are a survivor! My young life was full of turmoil, which I wont bother you with, unless you ask me to. It was from this that I learnt that I am a survivor!You have so much to offer! I believe in you Matthew, I would do so even if you are very dull and boring! Which you never are on here! Sending hugs, :) \\\stay positive when you can be! All these people on here are so loving, HEAL!

[@ian-zx1tx]

So this video just turned up in my feed, checked comments lots of good advice there for you Matthew and I would just like to add what a right good looking young guy ,add a smile (which will be back dont worry) and lots of good stuff will be heading your way , just got to get out and about anyway best wishes to you ....

[@mxttthxw]

thank you sm

[@reddeviljeremiahgodsoftheg4168]

I feel your pain ,thank you kindly for your video

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@41086662]

Stay positief, be happy my friend

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@simongodly4554]

You now appear on my recommended list 😁 probably means I should just subscribe 😀 I laughed about getting old and not having the time to change. I moved to France 😁 I can understand that as an American you are under almost the same amount of pressure as a Japanese ado (🇨🇵 adolescent) but seriously, you are overdoing it. You can't 'strive to be' the best person. It will just happen if you are genuine and make a bit of effort. It is rare, so rare, to be totally fulfilled but I've always reckoned that if you look back and think, am I happy with where I am today?, and feel 80% yes, you've made it. So ask yourself this, here you are talking to thousands of people from possibly across the globe (do a video and ask us where we are from 🤔😀) does this not make you sit up and think : I seem to be pretty good at this? Feck the day job, (if you have one, I haven't got to those videos yet) you have a purpose here. Reach out to some of your more interesting commentators (I'm boring so ignore me 😁) you might make friends. Come join the happy world on Bluesky 🦋 Salut 🇨🇵

[@МихайлоТисак-т5я]

God love you my dearest brother

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@cliftonevans8286]

Matt I don't know much about your life what you are going through. I know we can all help each other what you talk about i have been there i have lost many people that i love i have been in love and then kicked to the crub .but when one door closes another one will open i had a drug problem and thought all was lost and tryed to kill myself twice but i am still here i am now 70 i know my time is a lot shorter so what i think about is how i can help someone with time left Maybe that is why i am here i feel your pain and have you in my heart and prayers love you my friend God bless you.

[@cliftonevans8286]

Stay positive you have a great life ahead of you. Matt you are awesome.

[@armandobernal2549]

Hola De Chile 🇨🇱🍀🤴👋🙏👏✌👍😊😉🌈🌻

[@mxttthxw]

Hola

[@marvincloud3842]

When you lay down to go to sleep think of good things that you have or want to have tell yourself a great story before you know it you will be sound asleep. Sometimes it's okay to not do anything but exist, the rest will fall into place.

[@mxttthxw]

love this

[@jasoncoon5707]

The hardest fights are the best fights because if you survive, then you know you can keep going and thrive.

[@mxttthxw]

very true

[@KeithAlmond-j7r]

Matthew, I’ve had insomnia my whole life. Life feels meaningless I can relate. You’ll get depressed and, brain fog. If you don’t get sleep. Things aren’t great now. No,your not weak I can see your very strong. Don’t be afraid to take meds. I can count my friends on one hand. It was no accident you came into my life. Your a great-looking young man. I see great things happening for you. Your brain will try and play tricks on you, I think you should read some books or audiobook’s there’s so many free ones on you tube. I hoped I helped you a little. Much,love “Keith❤”.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much for this post. I could relate a lot. I really appreciate you and everything you have to say I hope you’re right and I hope everything the best for you.🖤

[@Roadrunr1161]

Matthew, I don't know why you are so sad but just know that God will never give you more than you can handle. Know this my friend, YOU MATTER!! So perhaps you need to start over. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again! Every day is a learning experience and you are created in God's image. So please start living your life again. There is a great big world out there and beautiful places to visit. You said you were in college so focus on your education and when you are not in school get out of your room and do something fun, something you really enjoy. I could go on and on with advice for you son but just remember this, God helps those who help themselves! Stay positive and always remember that you are not alone. People care about you. I have never met you but I care about you so I leave you with this, always keep the faith 🙏 and may God Bless you

[@mcclaynjazmyn9845]

Young Sir, I'm working on 60yrs of age and I'm in the very same situation that you are, sadly this world is changing so fast and sadly it's not for the good. I have God/Jesus in my life, but yet, just like you, going thru this world wondering just what the hell is it really all about. We Seek Truth, sometimes is back fires and hits hard, life is hard, it's very unforgiving and people are becoming colder, it's an increasingly evil world. We're on the brink of WW3, total global economic corruption, NWO stuff and we're living it now. An Election that's so corrupt already, our nation alone is imploding and what can any of us do about actually? I'm a truth seeker, hard as truth can be, it's good, but life is not promised to be easy, some of us seem to have a target on our backs, no matter how hard we try, it's just doesn't happen. I'm alone now in life, no family, handful of friends but all are 100's if not 1000's of miles away, only thru internet do we keep contact, but it not like having someone around in the flesh and helping and or being a help to one another. My health took a big hit 2 yrs ago and the system totally betrayed me, most excruciating pain ever, for 1 1/2 yrs, a dr who betrayed me, system betrayed me, and it's like you say, What the Hell...So what the hell is this all for and about? All I can say, if you got family, hang onto each other, this world is flip'n hard and fast. God knows what's coming, it's been long forewarned and now we are living it, incredible but scary times, because people are people, fear and pain are ugly, power and greed prevail and the few good people left are so out numbered, just what can be done...God Help Us All and We've Seen Nothing Yet, Yikes ! God Bless !

[@mxttthxw]

wow, my man this really has me thinking, but we will be the hope at the end of the day. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing as long as it matters to you seek truth seek yourself that’s all you have.

[@7728abbott]

Brain chemistry. Without meds, or therapy, the old school reset was to go running / jogging for 5 minutes. Might work. Next best, therapy.

[@jasonberkowitz4754]

Hope you will get outside and enjoy some nice fall weather.

[@peterchristensen9585]

It looks like you have a nice home and all your basic needs met. Start by being grateful for that, and hang in there. Something will come along that excites you and you'll have such fun learning about it and doing well with your new interest that you'll lie in bed unable to fall asleep because you are so excited about getting back to it the next day. At least, that's what's happened to me.

[@mxttthxw]

I hope you’re right my guy and you’re absolutely right. I appreciate you and hope you are all well.

[@jamesgrosrenaudjr812]

Dark night of the soul . Hope it gets better

[@djfntsy18]

The loneliness and depression is something I've felt hecka recently too bro, but I gotta tell you, Jesus is the answer fr. He's the reason I'm still alive and every time I'm wylin out, praying about it (and Him being there with me during the prayer) is what saves me from it and gives me peace and joy, reading the Bible helps me live my life way better fr too. It also gives me that peace and joy fr. You do matter homie, Jesus loves you and He wants to know you personally fr (if you don't know Him already). Imma be praying for you bro, life is hard fr, but He can help you through it and give you peace and joy fr fr. I'd just say to at least pray and read some of the Bible (I'd recommend some Psalms, a lot of them deal wit depression, and John, it has the basis Jesus' life and Who He is) if you ain't rocking with that already. Pursue Him and see whatchu find if you ain't found Him yet.

[@forvrlost]

listened to a lot of this with just the screen off. and damn u know I swear i’m just listening to myself… same wording same exact delivery… like you’re a copy of me. 0:28 is what I tell people whenever I get the chance to vent or when I talk to myself. it really fucking sucks that we’re gifted with so much knowledge and complexity that it’s impossible to see through the other side because we’re so self aware. so self aware that we don’t live in our own bodies AT ALL. just here observing the chaos and endless tormented tension of our heart and mind. it makes us want to off ourselves in the end. whenever I find peace these days I kinda just ask if the world would just take me then and there. we have this constant feeling of knowing we gotta do shit but just WONT do it. we care so much that we don’t care at all. the awareness is so painful. and it makes me very, very sick. it’s nothing but sad. I don’t feel real at all. and time is obliterating me.

[@ΕυάγγελοςΜούσγας]

Awesome and amazing bro 👌

[@mxttthxw]

🖤

[@jimv2094]

Hello Matthew my sweetheart, didn't get to come on last night i was so tired and today has been crazy, great video mate, i could see you were down the other day, i hope you are ok, i understand all you say in This video, manny days i feel the same, i think to myself ( i was having this thought about this situation 3 years ago and its still the same,) i know what its like to feel you can't see a way forward, and to get up in the morning feeling worse than before you went to bed, please hold in there my man your a bit depressed maybe, it will pass again, believe me im its favourite target i think! , The way you talk is a lot like the depression i get as there are different types i think, i always say its like a (thoughtful sadness,) anyway glad you can talk it out on here it does help to talk mate, please keep making the videos, if i was there ide give you a big cuddle my mate , hold strong , I love you so much ❤❤ XXX.

[@miguellehman6951]

Thank you Matthew..life is strange sometimes..do take care and be kind to yourself...are you 21 and in the U S A?? Lol😊😊

[@mxttthxw]

im19

[@firestorm7977]

I’ve felt the same way for 5 years, having turned 30.

[@mxttthxw]

i feel this i’m just not 30 yet

[@tincup108]

Self-doubt is an obstacle to happiness. You don't know when your life is going to change. It will happen when you least expect it. At least that's happened over my life. I won't go over the many things in my life that have changed me from day to day, from year to year, but they have. Your positivity for life, no matter what your life is now, will be the key. Negativity is your enemy, so think about even the small gifts in your life to keep you headed in a positive sphere of thinking. Your thoughts and your life are your personal journey. Try to appreciate the things in your life that make you happy and you overcome the things that will try to bring you down. Persevere until good overcomes regret. You may not notice them while they happen, but they will happen. Just be there to accept them.

[@mxttthxw]

love this

[@simondonohoe1221]

You sound depressed, that can be summed up as a feeling of impending doom. You need to reach out for professional help with this. I’m bipolar and have gone through a few long periods of depression and it always goes away eventually. You have to wait it out. Good luck and have faith and believe in yourself . Every day brings another sunrise !

[@Velvet-Sunshine.]

Actually I love your videos, because you speak your mind. Okay, but you say that you're going to get old and you won't feel like you're able to do anything. Well I tell you what buddy, I'm 69 years old, and I built this body into a champ. I feel better with a better attitude than I did when I was your age. Plus, I help a lot of people. All of them cherish me. Not bragging rights, It's true.

[@mxttthxw]

i absolutely love this

[@cantneygessner691]

You definitely have the flare. Hit the streets like a hustler since you've got the rave. Recently, I walked outside, finding a man asphalt-thrown into the air by speeding car with a huge crowd gathering. Everyone gawked and shook their heads when I asked if anyone checked he alive. I pulled his hoodie off and felt the faint pulse in his neck. Return to Mother Earth, who unfolds you in her embrace.

[@mikethorn70]

Matt, where are you? Hope you are well, take care, be safe, see you soon, I hope Ofa Atu🤗😊

[@vaylon1701]

Matthew, you are thinking way too much. Its caused by your hormones spiking. It will calm down sometime around 22-26. Till then, try and stay physically active. Get away from electronics for a few days and you will see a huge difference. The same thing you are going through is the same reason so many young guys start drinking and doing drugs. Its a way to calm that over thinking down. I promise it gets a lot better as time goes by. But how you deal with all these emotions and energy now is like a test of how you will deal with it in the future. One little thing that can help is to make out a list of all the things you need to do or want to do the next day, and tomorrow get to it with the list.

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much for this comment bro that actually sounds like a really good idea. Hope you’re having a good week. appreciate you

[@ChristopherHessman]

Dear be more positive to yourself. You work to one day at a time. Life is only the space you have. Please what makes you happy, what are your goals? Where do you live

[@ChristopherHessman]

Where do you live

[@clarkabbott7354]

Listen very carefully, everything you are experiencing is normal and is the spiritual process that everyone must go through. You are expecting things to be a certain way and it's not in our control. Don't try so hard because the opposite will occur if you don't let things flow as they are. Suicide is not an option as many think, you can't kill something that was never born. Everything you are speaking of is not a real thing, it's all mind. You will never run out of time and there is no tomorrow only the NOW. If you knew what I see it would be unbearable compared to what you are experiencing. You should listen more and speak less, you are not weak and the lack is real. Everything you are doing is exactly what you are supposed to do, your in the right place at the right time. Just calm down take a breath and know that you are not alone. Every grain of sand is important to the ALL. You are great and perfect in my eyes, it's darkest before the light and baby you are the light! Talk to you soon, you are stronger than you can imagine. Peace

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much for this comment

[@gko7307]

Brother, you're a young guy. Get out and go to school, work, hang out with friends... You're sweating over everything. Now isn't the time for that, really! Be a good person, help who you can along the way and all will fall into place.. for real. Limit the internet and stop game playing if you do. If you need someone to talk to/with I'm here.. George...

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much, my guy. I really appreciate you. 🖤

[@gko7307]

@@mxttthxw been where you are.. once I implemented those things life became much more pleasing. I put everything in Jesus' hands and... my life began to gradually become more meaningful and directed... You seem like a good guy, you will succeed and be impactful to many.. anxiety can crush you... Screw anxiety ❤️❤️

[@mxttthxw]

thank you so much for this my guy. I really appreciate it.

[@gko7307]

@@mxttthxw I appreciate you 😊

[@gko7307]

@@mxttthxw 😊😊😊

[@BackboneOfReality]

Why don't we pick a good time for us both to do a structured video call on zoom or whichever, where check-in, listen, respond, and establish goals and active pathways? We could make it a weekly or fortnightly thing.

[@mxttthxw]

Thank you sm my man i would let you know 🖤

[@keenanwilliams1206]

it's crazy because what you're saying I literally was just living that; I mean thinking I was losing my mind the whole 9. All I can say is that Jesus Christ died for your sins, and he rose from the dead 3 days later for your Justification. That’s what’s real bro.

[@pakabe8774]

You don't have to be the best version of yourself. Being yourself as you are is more than enough. Most times I am not sure what you try to achieve with your videos. At some points it seems to be pretty clear, that you suffer (and I know how you feel ), but minutes later you are teaching us. I guess it is your way of singing in the darkness to convince yourself that there is no monster under your bed, behind the next corner, somewhere in the shadow. Matthew, we both are suffering. Sometimes I cry for so many reasons. I could give you an easy answere for almost everything. I could tell you about god and how he saved me, like many others do. I could tell you from a very deep spiritual experience in which God revealed Himself to me and freed me, an experience that was like I was put into the center of the universe, unbelievable energy was flowing through my body and it felt like a deep breath of the universe into my existence - I can't even find proper words to explain what happened, because all words are stale in comparison to this experience. But Matthew, I am still suffering. Not always, but deeply. I am crying, quite often. But it is okay, because you are there! You are there in this world and deep inside our innermost selves we know each other. What ever you experience, no matter what, you experience me. I am suffering with you, but I am not there to suffer, like you are not there to suffer. I love you, Matthew! I am always with you. Death won't stop me from being there with you, at your side. I will cry with you, I will smile with you. I will struggle with you and I will succeed with you! I know your secrets, your shadows, you abysms and I love you as you are. We have never met and as it looks like, we might never meet as we are now. But deep inside we are connected and you know me, because I am you. Others might think I am crazy, but you know that I am, because we are. You have to be pretty crazy not to go crazy in a crazy world. Craziness isn't the worst thing that could have happened to us, because we crazy people can have a lot of fun and joy. I absolutely insist on enjoying life. We insist on enjoying life! Insisting on something doesn't just mean politely asking for some fun, pleasure or joy and then paying for it or even working hard to achieve it. Matthew, we do insist on enjoying life, don't we? You deserve it! My love will always be with you!

[@mikethorn70]

I care about you, you are worthy to be cared for I promise you are cared for and loved. You are learning and growing every day. Some days we seam to learn alot, some days it's a repeat, you talked about your game, you're probably pretty good, why because you practice, you do it again and again uou learn a new Easter egg i think they are called. You do try, you're here, you are far from worthless. I want you to live, many people want you to. You're possibly an empath. I'm listening if I knew how to dm idcsend yiu myvemail or phone number incase you have questions or concerns, you are growing . . .

[@johnconway4161]

Hi Matthew how are you and great video

[@mxttthxw]

i’m doing all right, my guy thank you so much🖤

[@johnconway4161]

​@@mxttthxwthat's good to hear Matthew and you're welcome

[@AEROCAT425]

😂im like 56 my thoughts on life well i beleive from day you are born youre entire life is mapped out down to random people you meet to events that take place not wanting to ram religion down youre throat ay but ay a prayer or to as you get older thing change in how you think i can only tell you what i know from things ive been through youre not weak and you aint worthless if you want to live well that just means that you have time to get through things and then will come the day when the penny drops and you figure out whats got youre wheels spinning in the mud hang in there dude my life at bout youre age was so mixed up and confusing it wasnt till i was 30 that they pinpointed my mental health disorder then that changed shit in weird way but i adapted and still adapting to the damage the strokes did as my disorder has changed in how it affects me cause of the strokes but im still learning shit about life at my age so yeh you will get there dude hang in there strong and dont loose faith in youreself to navigate all this stuff in the way you present i do se you as an extremely derp thinker that has a very strong mental attitude thats a rare thing but a very good thing 🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺

[@slickwillie9526]

Magnesium supplements calm the mind. Magnesium Citrate or Magnesium Glycinate. Watch some Doctor Berg videos... My 2 cents.

[@JEgasmanpa]

This generation is so priviledged (generational wealth, Hovering parents etc) that there is no impetus to strive for better. They already have everything. They have Food, Nice shelter, Nice clothing, free health care...no worries. The past generations left the comfort of home, got a job (any job) or many jobs and went to school. Even if you take a meaningless job you might find some meaning in it. Something that could trigger a desire to do something for the rest of your life.

[@williamstockdale4833]

🙏