I don't know how to moderate my comments anymore | Selfharmerproblems

[@justcallmemoon2157]

for anyone wanting to vent in a graphic or triggering way, there are subreddits (like r/selfharm) where you can ask for advice, vent, and just ask others that are struggeling how to cope. The rules are clear there too. If you show pictures or ask of ways to selfharm your thread will get deleted. But if you have no intention on doing any of that then everyone is welcome and supported by that community. stay safe

[@Selfharmerproblems]

I would love to redirect people to places they could vent and rant! Do you know any others?

[@justcallmemoon2157]

@@Selfharmerproblems I know there are special discord servers for them. I'm not sure what else there is but on reddit theres all different kinds of subreddits for eating disorders, mental disorders and many more that help others. i find that those subreddits have good mods too so it stays a safe place for everyone.

[@candicepenner9842]

There’s a website I go to called novni where you can just write anything to get it off your chest and you can turn comments on or off as well as make your post private if you want. I’ve found it really helpful and the community there is super supportive.

[@Selfharmerproblems]

@@candicepenner9842 thank you so much for the suggestion!

[@sourpatchstrawberry]

not to be rude, but there are many extremely graphic pictures of self harm on reddit that have absolutely destroyed me so i don’t recommend those

[@greyv9107]

a lot of these comments you read sound like young ppl not thinking straight. i think all the guidelines you proposed sound great, maybe also include that you cant delete any comments that make you uncomfortable, at your own discretion. thanks for keeping this a non triggering space for us!

[@amogus2451]

i entirely agree, having methods of self-harming or tools in a comment section, are entirely unacceptable

[@konstantinacyprus8659]

i agree 100% some of those comments are wrong, and could potentially cause someone to try those things

[@EyeofZai]

hey- i can’t believe i found your channel again. when i was self-harming, you provided a place where i didn’t feel like i was broken. i first watched your content 4-ish years ago, and it’s crazy to think of how far i’ve come

[@mangodabean]

Yeah me too but it was about a year ago for me. I’ve improved a lot since then and while im still in the process of healing, i’m doing so much better than I was a year ago. This channel was one of the things that really helped me when i was at my lowest and i dont think id be where i am now without it.

[@adrianphelipe6]

i really love your hair that's it

[@Elizabeth-vq3jh]

it's your account and you can moderate how you see fit. the ones asking for help to stop are okay but asking for tips to self harm shouldn't be allowed, this is your place and you have the right to feel safe on your account without seeing comments asking for tips to self harm or read graphic descriptions.

[@carolinehodgkiss2274]

I think that you should put in the following guidelines: - No tool referencing for self-harm - No mentioning of ways to self-harm - No detailed descriptions of wounds, surgery etc - No promoting self-harm - No hate in the comments e.g Making someone feel pathetic because they are self-harming/have self-harmed and are in the healing process Hope this helps.

[@carolinehodgkiss2274]

This does need to be a safe space for people to be open, but also MINDFUL of what they say and do

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Indeed! I would add no medical question or questions about how to hide sh. And no venting/ranting about your self harm

[@carolinehodgkiss2274]

@@Selfharmerproblems Yep. Agreed, I enjoyed our chat on Insta. Was great to talk to someone who’s been though the same stuff. I would also add in No Foul Language - swearing etc

[@petewentzenthusiast5137]

What I would do for a hug from you are literally so nice

[@Vincent-ym3fw]

I agree with you. I think you shouldn't allow people write in comments what they use to selfharm and write graphic stuff, it can trigger a lot of people. (Sorry if I did some spelling mistakes)

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Thank you for your input!

[@boardingurban]

or we can put TW: and then the triggering stuff

[@Selfharmerproblems]

@@boardingurban I don't think I would feel comfortable with that. Some things shouldn't be on the internet, even with a trigger warning

[@jay8256]

I totally agree, and if people share what they use to self harm it can trigger so many people on very high levels MIGHT TRIGGER SOMEONE: (guys I’m clean for a week I’m so proud of my self, sorry if this is a trigger)

[@Selfharmerproblems]

I don't think this is triggering! Congratulations 🎈

[@jay8256]

@@Selfharmerproblems thanks! And im never know what might trigger someone so I did just in case :3

[@anteros_21]

yay good job! so proud you can do this

[@Ozisl]

Some people have always glorified it... you can't prevent that, it always happens. It's always been a problem, and is one of the more frequent reasons people want to shut down any helpful conversations, because it attracts those people. And you aren't a therapist... the best you can do is direct people to resources and care... let them know they aren't alone, the realities of it... the internet comments have always been a cesspool for *any* issue...

[@YouthPotential]

Best comment here❤️

[@isaak1748]

Exactly, it's not her fault that that happens

[@molly4243]

i dont know if youll see this but i really love your chanel. you remind me a lot of my older sister who has now moved out of home and watching your videos is very comforting, thank you so much :>

[@Cha-he9ch]

For the second type of comments, maybe you could have a message prepared in advance saying like: "thank you for venting out here. Unfortunately I can't help you right now because I get a lot of comments like this and it's not my job to do so. But I can redirect you to other ressources. I hope things will be okay for you." And then you list out a bunch of links to helplines/discord groupchats etc Just a suggestion ^^ And yes, you could get moderators for the comments (maybe i could consider idk)

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Thank you for the suggestion!

[@Carrot.Canvas]

I agree with your first 3 rules! Another rule I suggest is just noting encouraging self harm in any way. Just so that people will not be like “oh well technically it doesn’t break any rules” (not accusing) but just a suggestion :)

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Yes that I one I was thinking about too!

[@kirap4476]

Self harm on 11.1.2015 Medicated on 1.6.2018 1.24.2019 over one year with medication It's 2021, i just had a really strong urge on 5.14.2021 and i am looking for closure to not i am not along. Thank you for your videos :-) they inspire me to continue

[@mishmash6570]

One of my biggest triggers is seeing people saying that they just did it for the first time. It gets me angry, Idk why tho. Forums like the sh reddit page, and the “I am sober” app, have honestly been so bad for me because I don’t like to see when younger self harmers aren’t even trying to get better. These videos are the only places where I feel acknowledged, but not triggered. Thanks for fixing up your comment boxes 😭

[@estherdickey2185]

I agree that the first type of comments can be triggering, but the second ones can be helpful for the people making them. What if you made a specific post where the comment section is just for people ranting and people helping them, and link to it in your other posts? That way it's easy to avoid if someone doesn't want to see those comments, but also easy for people who want to help or be helped to find. Also I saw another comment suggesting a discord for that, I think that is a good idea as well

[@jay8256]

That’s a good idea!

[@Selfharmerproblems]

I like the idea of having a specific place/comment thread dedicated to that! However my issue is still that I won't have time answer and help everyone on KZbin, and that these threads may become a known and dedicated triggering place

[@estherdickey2185]

@@Selfharmerproblems well I'm thinking more about you could potentially end up forming a community where people could go for help, with other people like you there to help them, so you don't have to feel like you need to help everyone. And triggering stuff about tools and types of self harm would still be banned of course.

[@FroggyFreg]

I can see how it would be triggering since Ik what it's like to have trauma. Plz make sure to think of others before u comment. If ur struggling rn I hope you get better u can eventually get through this.

[@lillianrae4334]

I think it is so important that people have somewhere to open up, but at the same time it’s twice as important to not trigger anyone. By “opening up” I mean simply asking for help, saying you aren’t okay, or something like that. Absolutely NOT describing what to use or how you self harm. I just went to the comments on one of your videos and I was shocked at what people were saying. It’s so important to take care of yourself but PLEASE think about the mindset of others first. Everyone is fighting a different battle, and some just need you to help pretend their minds.

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Exactly! The comment section is not the place for that in my opinion. Also what comment section was it? So I can go clear that up

[@lillianrae4334]

@@Selfharmerproblems it was just a few under “how to take care of self harm cuts”.

[@alexp6757]

I tottally agree :), and just a question if im like clean for a long time (example 1 month) .Can people who hit such milestones write it in the comments ? for other wievers to congratulate them ? i know its a weird question but its totally up to u, stay safe

[@Selfharmerproblems]

From my perspective, celebrating milestones is a good thing!

[@alexp6757]

@@Selfharmerproblems Okay, thank u for answering

[@FroggyFreg]

Congrats I hope it continues and u can eventually get better

[@Vanilla91459]

Maybe it’s to let people know their not alone. Or it could be dark humor. Also I love how you try to stop people from watching this because it might be triggering with cute videos.

[@Treeboy85]

I am 75 day clean!

[@mightbeavampire]

no tools, no mention of things like spesific numbers of stitches, trigger/content warnings, no tips of any format, ** out words that could be triggering i personally feel comfortable hearing other people's stories because it makes me feel less alone but it could be done more tactfully?

[@kiko7784]

Ooh this could be really helpful actually! I agree! :)

[@Selfharmerproblems]

The no mention of specific numbers is really interesting!

[@mightbeavampire]

@@Selfharmerproblems you mentioned baby cut syndrome and i think a similar mentality could be used for this? im not 100% sure if that's just personal experience though

[@cosmice33]

I think there's setting in youtube studio to block certain words, I'm so sorry that you have to deal with those kind of comments (not in a sense that the people are bad, but in a sense of the stress that's put on you) I hope you the best through this though!

[@anteros_21]

i believe i have ranted in your comment section before? im going to put a tw but i an still going to try and keep it as pg as possible i dont sh because my anxiety makes it physically impossible, but i was in a really really bad place when i found your videos and i really appreciate them. you openly talking about this things has got me threw a lot. sorry if this makes you uncomfortable or it crosses the line, and sorry if i have said anything offensive in the past

[@Kirbinatorrrr]

Um if it helps here are some things I thi k sound decent but not to strict so people can still feel free to ask for help -the rules you mentioned -be kind to others -dont encourage somebody to continue self harm I'm sorry these late the only thoughts I have I hope the help

[@MisterLewa]

I think you just need to block some words and maybe some noderators can help you, anyways comments are comments, your channel still very cool and helpful:)

[@greyowl15]

I like the guidelines idea a lot. Perhaps find someone to monitor the comments section (someone who isn't easily triggered/doesn't deal with self harm). Also in the guidelines video maybe link/discuss some spaces/forums/reliable hotlines/etc where it would be more appropriate for people to vent (like the last comment type you discussed)

[@williamwoodrow5065]

I love your channel

[@drewhenderson7604]

I am jealous of your blue hair

[@alexaschaak4047]

Thank you for making this video I love your channel

[@jackricketts7025]

Hey malika hope you are well and staying safe

[@memorysstories1561]

It's hard to get on one side because 1. I know that places where no one knows you or can judge you because of your look is safe for so many people and comments are always a safe place 2. When people are self harming they're searching for triggering stuff. I do that myself, but I know that this is not good at all. But still they need a place to open up. So i think maybe you should put some rules like the ones you mentioned, but not too much so people still have this safe place.

[@Selfharmerproblems]

I agree this space is needed, but I don't think a public comment section is the best place for that. My DMs are always open if people want to reach out

[@qwwqqeqw8954]

Howd you get your hair like that

[@lilwoowoowoozie9242]

I agree with livy to an extent. But tbh it's just words, and anyone can still say anything behind a keyboard. If you really want the triggering comments to stop, maybe the only solutions are to either report them to YT or just turn off comments altogether (I know you don't want to do that, but if all else fails, I feel like it's the only other option unfortunately)

[@mychannelnameislovely4285]

Early 🙂

[@jesseeerikaine9864]

Im fucked i cutted my arm maybe too deep and its bleeding like a hell and it maybe need stiches but i cant tell my mom cuz she cant understand and im scared of hospitals

[@saavikofvulcan6887]

Mk. So if someone gets triggered by mentions of Self-harm, then why the hell are they on this channel? Or looking in the comments for that matter? Sometimes people don't have access to anything besides KZbin and they need to vent. Other times they have been bullied or kicked out everywhere else. I was bullied to the point of nearly committing suicide on Amino and Reddit so I had no place to go. Some people like KZbin comments sections better because chances are, you never hear from the people again after they like/reply to your comment. I love this channel, but I don't really think it is fair to take a safe space away from people just because other people, who can very well avoid it, are upset by it. I know I'm going to get quite a bit of hate for this, but whatever. I also know people are going to say stuff about other channels to vent on, but they do the same thing that this girl does. The comments on these videos are where self-harmers meet each other and share experiences. I have made some friends like places like this. It is so easy to not read the comments on a video or just avoid the channel. If you read this all the way through, thanks. Have a nice day!!

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Thank you for your opinion! I see where you're coming from. But I still don't think the KZbin comment section is an appropriate place to vent, especially when we talk about people describing their self harm with graphic details. Most of those comments dont get any answers, so I'm doubting they're getting much help. And even if they do, if one person gets help but in the process harms another, it's not a net positive. I agree we all have our responsibility in what content we seek, but in my vision that doesn't give you a free pass to post extremely triggering things, especially not in a place that was not meant for that. There are a lot of other spaces that have been created for that purpose on Reddit and Discord where I will be redirecting people

[@saavikofvulcan6887]

@@Selfharmerproblems I get where you are coming from, but everyone gets triggered by different things. Everyone is different. So something that triggers one person might help someone else. I have been kicked out of multiple places online that are supposed to be helpful. I'm not trying to be difficult and I'm sorry if I'm being annoying. Have a nice day :)

[@YouthPotential]

#berespectfulplease

[@marblecorner1964]

When do you think is the right time to see a psychiatrist and get meds for mental health?

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Whenever you need it!

[@wanderingsoul2758]

What country are you from?

[@Selfharmerproblems]

Switzerland, french speaking part!

[@wanderingsoul2758]

@@Selfharmerproblems ah I love your accent

[@lexygrace2775]

I do think that y'all shouldn't say these things