I HAVE A CONFESSION TO MAKE

[@Ell5589]

I’m saddened by so many negative comments here, this woman was raised in the public eye, not by her choice, she’s experienced raw humiliation and turmoil within her family and the religion she was raised in. None of this by choice. She’s now taking her experiences and using them to come out and help others. I think that’s incredibly brave. I am not at all a religious person, and I see such beauty in what she’s doing with her life now. She was given a platform and now she’s using it to help others. Please give her a break. For the comment about Jeremy getting a real job? I believe he’s a pastor, that looks like a real job to me. ❤ congratulations to this incredibly brave woman.

[@AnnieOklee851]

I agree 💯 she's an amazing young lady who's very strong to have gone through so much in her life. She didn't ask for anything that happened to her growing up.

[@aj25055]

Agreed.

[@lyn9432]

Totally agree well said.

[@throughfaithandgrace2970]

amen!!!!

[@daniiiakasha4711]

I don’t see anyyyy negative comments

[@kandmelinda]

Isn't she just a breath of fresh air. I am so happy for her. She has risen above her circumstances and not let them control her life. BEAUTIFUL ❤❤

[@lorileewalters2018]

Good for you sweetie, I’ve been manipulated my entire life, afraid to say no, people telling me if you do that I’m never going to speak to you again, it’s taken its toll, I’m 59 and fighting to find myself, depression, anxiety, ptsd, anxiety and loneliness. I’ve been bullied in school and even just a few years ago in my job as a phlebotomist, I was hit in the head by a co-worker and threatened to have my head ran through a concrete wall, nothing was done except I lost my job. And that’s just 1 story of many I could tell. Jinger you are a blessing and a treasure. You have an amazing husband and beautiful little girls. Thank you for being here, I listen to you and Jeremy every video you make. I so hope to purchase your book someday, but I just can’t afford to. Thank you again you’re a very special gift from God, Love and Blessings from Indiana✝️🥰🌼🙏🏼✨🕊️♥️☮️🇺🇸❣️❣️❣️❣️

[@dani23dani85]

Thank you for sharing ❤

[@evagerardo7480]

I absolutely appreciate you sharing your journey as I've been through something extremely similar... Trying to rid my mind, body and soul of those ties that bind. Currently struggling with CHF and Lupus... Blessed to just turn 57 1 week ago. Blessings to you and yours from Caledonia Wisconsin

[@kandiecrider4707]

Omgshhh THANK YOU ❤ My entire life I've found myself in situations I would say "I'm sorry" to someone because I've felt like I didn't please them enough or say to someone "Yes, no problem." When they need something even though it would take a toll on me physically spiritually and mentally. Being a people pleaser isn't easy.

[@donnaeckler4190]

I’m 63 and still a people pleaser. I’m happy for you and that you were able to break free from that. I has literally made me very sick with numerous chronic illnesses. But I am trying, when I was growing up there wasn’t help out there and you were considered weak if you ever spoke up about things so you just sucked it up and carried on. I truly so happy for you and your children and husband. You and your siblings have been through a lot at no fault of your own.❤

[@Julie-uq7sz]

So excited for you! I was a people pleaser until about 5 years ago when I realized that God wants us to be "peace makers" not "peacekeepers". Enjoy this journey! Its so freeing!!!

[@rwms731]

I admire your courage to boldly share your faith as you grow in Him.

[@jbauntie]

Looking forward to reading this.I’ve struggled with people pleasing my whole life and especially when I was younger.I’ve gotten to a better place when it comes to people pleasing over the years and with spiritual & personal growth but I think I’ll always struggle with it to a degree.I like peace. I don’t like confrontation or upset in relationships…I don’t like letting people down but it’s impossible to please everyone all the time.I realized I was spending so much time & energy trying to please others and worrying about pleasing others that I lost focus of the only one I should be aiming to please & that’s God and even He knows I’m human and imperfect & despite my best efforts I will and do fail Him sometimes and He understands that and loves me anyway.God Himself is not a people pleaser…nor was Jesus ….and we’re supposed to walk in their image…so although we should love & respect others and help people and nurture our relationships….we’re not supposed to be people pleasers all the time. I’m interested to hear Jinger’s thoughts on this.Will definitely be getting this book.Congratulations on your new book Jinger😊

[@teresak9454]

I am so excited to hear that you have written a book on this topic!! I thought I was so much farther along in being a people pleaser, but the last months, people pleasing has shown up over and over. The timing for this book could not be better! Thank you, Jinger!!

[@juicie25bt]

I bet sooooo many out there can relate to this. I'm so happy that u recognized it so young bcuz it took me into my 60's bfor I realized it. It's a process & a hard habit to break. Recognizing it is the first step...

[@tiffanymitchellsetliff5915]

You are so strong... I'm like you... Thanks for being yourself. You are teaching others. I would love to have your book!

[@evangelicful]

Codependency is so hard to battle. People pleasing is hard to battle. When you change...nobody gets to mistreat you anymore bc you defend yourself!! Prayers for you!@

[@lindadroege5564]

Congratulations Jinger! I hope it becomes #1 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@tammyharper4152]

So thankful you find your voice and you have a wonderful support network behind you

[@donnajoyner9781]

Keep growing and going Jinger! We celebrate your journey!🙏🏽✝️🙌🏽🎉🎊 Congratulations!

[@nn-do6du]

Thank you Jinger for this message. To God be the Glory ! Hebrews 12: 1-3 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

[@jenniferdepuydt6325]

Oh Jinger, this hit me SO hard because I felt like you were talking about me!! I too have been a people pleaser and have heard too many times to count, "stop apologizing! Stop saying I'm sorry! You didn't do anything wrong!" Yes. I just wanted everyone around me to be happy. I have sat there too many times and kept my mouth closed and my voice silent when I should have been shouting from rooftops. THANK YOU for talking about this painful subject and for being so vulnerable and transparent by writing your book. I can't wait read it!!! Keep doing what you are doing. You and Jeremy and your girls are going to change the world everywhere you go. Thank you. 🙏🏼 ❤

[@missaroo68]

Thank you, Jinger, for your transparency and writing a book on this very needed subject, esp for those in the family of God. I have been a pastor's wife for over 30 years, and I am a helper personality (on the Enneagram) and have sometimes found my value in what I do, and what people think of me. Through counseling, and reading good books like yours, I too have found freedom (and continue to... as it IS a journey until we go be with Jesus!). I look forward to reading your book! YOU GO GIRL!

[@CHBT2021]

Just an observation from what I’ve seen watching via a small screen your years on tv shows, read in books, seeing you grow into an amazing adult, you use the phrase “imaginary expectations” when many of those expectations aren’t imaginary they are legitimate focused expectations on you. Expectations on you as a girl, young woman into marriage by the fundamentalist cult you were conditioned by. Along with expectations placed on you by family and even yourself. I’m sure there are imaginary expectations that you experienced. However, you are such a nice kind person you seem to have difficulty with labeling blame on individuals. Hun it’s okay and can be so freeing to put a name to those who’ve put those expectations on you leading you to those destructive tendencies of people pleasing and co-dependency behaviors. I am very much looking forward to read what you have to say in your new book. And see how you’ve grown and developed on your journey of self development and growth with G*d. Many Blessings.

[@sofiaceleste2211]

Such a beautiful soul ... God bless you and your beautiful family🤗

[@paigegillam]

I began your last book and couldn't put it down. I will look for this new one as well. Im very much like the description you gave. In changing my perspective in caring for myself as well as others I have lost some I thought were close to me along the way.

[@carrielynn1978]

I'm the same way, Jinger. Everything you're saying describes me too. If I feel i disappointed someone or made them mad, my anxiety takes over and I get upset and stressed.

[@topazzsky]

I was a people pleaser, but now I'm putting myself and my happiness first. That doesn't mean I don't help or care for people. It means if its going to drain me too much, or make me unhappy, or exhausted I stop and consider my health, my mental well being, and then choose me. I politely turn people down, or just dont go do what I used to. I have lost people in my life because I no longer allow myself to be used by narcissists, or co-dependants, or even users. My world is smaller now, but I'm more comfortable in in, in myself. I still have to heal from the damage of the past, from family, friends and others, but at least now the future is open to what do I want, instead of putting it on a back burner then realizing 30 years have gone by and I have none of my own dreams.

[@whitney5581]

Congratulations!! Wishing you all the success with your new book, I’m confident many will be encouraged!!

[@checkyourhead9]

This has really helped me! This was like an epiphany in my heart. It's amazing to have someone else speaking my own feelings. Thank you

[@nancymosley708]

Thank you for sharing your heart and always in a respectful way. May God be glorified in what you have written and desire to share with others. I’m finishing up your first book and I look forward to this book. God bless you Jinger.

[@shirleyw7811]

Thank you Jinger for sharing this. I am also a people pleaser, and I'm slowly learning how to stop this in my life. ❤

[@5tcm103]

Wonderful!!!!! Need this in my life, I literally just prayed for this in my own heart. What a blessing you are, Jinger!!!

[@cassjking]

I found healing in your first book. As a people pleaser, I am excited for this book! Constantly worrying about making everyone happy, is a very exhausting life...and one I've been wrestling to break free from for YEARS with little results. Totally getting this!

[@KellyElizabeth1]

It is so good to see how you are growing in wisdom and strength in the Lord. I was fascinated by your large family and the show when you were a young girl and found myself defending the lifestyle and as a Christian (from a different tradition)was deeply saddened when so many things unraveled. As a people pleaser myself, this is such an important topic. We can and should be assertive, maintain healthy boundaries, and speak truth in love. Fortunately, as a pleaser, I haven’t been taken advantage of by those closest to me and am blessed with godly people in my life. I have had to learn to assert myself and now help others (mostly women) to do the same.

[@lindahaggard6416]

Bless you for helping others

[@cjdrust]

I’m a people pleaser as well…. It takes a toll on you. I’m excited to read this book!!

[@lyn9432]

Me to, I always worry about what people think about me, I always put myself down and I put others before myself but if others put us down they are not worth bothering about they are not genuine people we deserve better.

[@ElliePixar]

I’m a month short from turning 44 and I’m 💯 looking forward to this book. My people pleasing moments have at times caused friction between my marriage and I’m slowly learning how to navigate out of that. Thank you for such great information.

[@allisonjohnson6399]

I am excited to get this book sweet Jinger!! I am a 47 year old people pleaser....I will turn a TV show if someone else comes in the room because I don't want them to be "burdened" with what I like to watch. I hate hate hate confrontation and will avoid it at all costs. I will sacrifice my opinions for fear of stirring up an argument. I will make sure people are comfortable at my expense. I see so much selfishness in the world, so much inconsideration, that I want to make sure I am the one that ISN'T like that. But I know there are times I need to put myself first too. I am anxious to see what your take is on being a "recovering people pleaser" and hopefully I can glean some wisdom and find ways to help my own situation. God bless you dear one!

[@teresavazquez264]

I hope you have found the courage to stand up to your father and acknowledge all the wrong he has done. Against you and your siblings, you’ve always been so respectful and kind.

[@Bev-s1g]

Jinger loves her. Dad, Mr. Dugger is very nice! I know somebody that stayed with the Duggers and they were very nice to them. Jill is the one that doesn’t speak highly of her father. Please don’t put that on Jinger that she doesn’t have a deep love and admiration for her father. I’m sure you did not mean to. You probably got her and Jill confused.

[@CheapsKate77]

@@Bev-s1g She can still love her father but also acknowledge the harm he did to her and her siblings. He is the reason why she is a people pleaser. He had them all in a cult with IBLP where women were forced to smile and never complain about anything. Jill is the only one who has truly stood up for herself.

[@Bev-s1g]

@@CheapsKate77 I understand what you’re trying to say. My husband and I were highly influenced with the BILP/Bill Gothard teaching. Bill Gothard would fill up arenas in the 80s with his teachings. Many different denominations would follow him. The conferences would take up a full week of evenings,and a whole Saturday. And his teachings were very practical with Scripture. Jim Bob loves his family and was only trying to teach them scriptural things. But it’s sad what it became because Bill Gothard may have believed a little bit too much in himself instead of the Lord. I think Jim Bob is a very kind and loving father. Did you ever watch the show where he introduced Jill to Derek in India. I’m sure this whole thing breaks his heart. I’m sure Jinger‘s book is wonderful, but I don’t think it was because of her dad that part of it was written. but that’s just my thoughts. God Bless You!

[@aniacool314]

I’m so excited, Jinger!!! Becoming Free Indeed has blessed and changed my life! I can’t wait to read this book!!

[@smcjjennings7532]

I could have used this 5 years ago to confront my abusive father as I have been wired to be a people pleaser as well because of my life experiences and trauma I have walked through. I will definitely be reading this book. I'm always looking for ways to learn more about myself and through the Lord's help, change my people pleasing ways. God bless.

[@amberthomas5014]

I people please and always think and do for others. It's lonely sometimes. I usually feel like I love others more than I am loved.

[@lindahaggard6416]

@amberthomas5014 Sweet Amber, I'm a 74 year old Great Grandmother who has "people pleased all my life and Jinger's book helped me so much. God promises you that you REAP WHAT YOU SOW, MORE than you sowed, and LATER THAN you sowed it. Amber it sounds like you'll have a lot of kindness coming your way. Sounds like some people might have USED your kindness but it will come back to you in so many ways probably when you least expect it. Remember you have to love and care for yourself! Even on here your comment jumped out at me and I enjoyed chatting with you. Love and take care of yourself and there'll be plenty of love left over for you to give away!!❤❤❤❤❤

[@sherrychavez6233]

Congratulations on your new book!

[@amberm9853]

I can't relate, but I'm still interested in reading. I'm happy that you are healing from this.😊

[@annavazquez2426]

My prayer is for healing in your whole family I’m proud of the woman you are and the message you share. ❤as from one people pleaser to another it’s starts with us being honest and loving to know you are enough for the Lord and that we don’t need to please everyone because we live in an audience of 1 ❤

[@Ojvyfz]

Its anxious attachement. U cant stand others not being on good terms with you and a hyper responsibility for them, when it's not your job in the first place to take care of them.

[@CaliMel1111]

Yup. It's a product of the way that her parents "Trained" them as babies. It's sad.

[@anitawilliams6954]

Congratulations Jinger. So happy for you. You're such an inspiration 💛 ❤

[@Growing_in_motherhood]

What an important message to share Jinger! I’m so happy you’re finding freedom in the truth and have started using your voice especially when it’s most difficult! I’m not a people pleaser but I have seen the bondage it holds and the detriment it brings.

[@valeriemoran842]

Love Jinger❤ she is authentic and brave and continues to evolve and live her best life!!❤❤

[@househannah333]

So excited to read this! I fervently enjoyed reading Becoming Free Indeed.

[@Madeligned]

Imaginary expectation- just that phrase speaks volumes to me wow. Im happy you grew and could make this video so I could watch and reflect myself.

[@pictureplayzrbxalt4468]

GOOD FOR YOU SPEAKING OUT I'VE DONE IT MY HOLE LIFE

[@KristenKaz]

This is a thinly veiled description of being raised in her family & the results of that upbringing. Praise God that she is with Jeremy & forging a Christian life that doesn’t involve her parent’s continued influence. ❤

[@amymeier1239]

Oh Jinger! You are so dear and sweet! I cannot wait to read your book, as I am also a “people pleaser”. I also want others to be happy. I want everyone to like everyone, especially family. It has worn on me over the years. I have a good heart, love Jesus, and just want to please others. I am 54 years old, and I just can’t do this anymore. I have tried and tried, only to move on to the next one to please. Thank you, Jinger dear one!

[@evagerardo7480]

Thank you so very much for sharing this video and opening up on your journey. I can most certainly relate to the people pleaser mentality. Im still working my way through and out of what weighs on me. Thank you again and so many continued blessings for you, Jeremy and the children. Love from Caledonia Wisconsin

[@elyvargas171]

I can totally relate to this!! ❤

[@susan-qf2he]

Such a strong woman you are Jinger. (That is a beautiful picture).

[@whitefilly8802]

It is the fear of man, if you want to boil it down to its roots. I hope your book does an excellent job of examining this :)

[@tuwanastores9579]

That whole book she wrote... Was her afraid of upsetting her family.

[@rhondanau7807]

Congratulations on your new book, Jinger. You are doing amazing job

[@LaurenElizabethGatch]

Congratulations Jinger!! I SO, SO loved your last book Becoming Free Indeed!! Cannot wait to see what Jesus does next in your life!!! 🙏🙏🙏

[@helenduffy4811]

I relate Jinger, God bless you every day & thank you 🙏❤️

[@naturegirl7420]

writing a book with your PhD in psychology should be a go to book. Best of luck…I hope it helps others ; it’s a tough subject because you don’t want to turn your back on people who need help but are clumsy in asking…

[@lilacscentedfushias1852]

I remember them being told to never give a bad report on someone, even if they were a terrible person or did anything negative right to terrible behaviour.

[@Zhauser7]

Just added to my Christmas wish list! Can’t wait to read!

[@kelseybosma1440]

Jinger can we get a shoutout for the gray denim outfit? So excited for the book!

[@Windsweptzariel]

I’m confused because you said people pleasers are focused on self. Usually, people pleasers will neglect their own needs to please others. People solely focused on themselves don’t care about pleasing others. I agree that people pleasing can be harmful.

[@LisaHatch-s2h]

I’m excited to read your new book. Love your outfit!❤💕

[@Dee-g8p9h]

I’m also a people pleaser. I just left a job that I was working so hard to please them but discovered they’re doing illegal things in healthcare and determined that I could not continue working there. I don’t know what the future is but I know Who holds the future.

[@danat3961]

Love you jinger!!!!!! I will be reading your book!

[@mil8903]

Right when I needed this 😢😢

[@molivah]

Man, seems like you and I both have had alot of the same weaknesses. I never watched the show and wasn't brought up in the same hyper-rules based environment you did being involved with IBLP. However I read your first book and I went through alot of the struggles with legalism as a teenager that you went through. So your first book resonated with me. I also struggled horribly with people pleasing as a teen and still do to a certain extent today as an adult. God has healed me alot of that, but I still have work to do. I look forward to your new book to see what God has taught you.

[@etnmama5752]

This is such good news! I loved your other book, and as a fellow people pleaser, I’m sure I will be able to glean even more knowledge just like I did from the long journey out of legalism. Thank you for sharing! ❤️

[@breckenberning]

Thank you, Jinger….just pre-ordered! Can’t wait - need this! ❤

[@blessed3584]

Jinger, I am looking so forward to reading your new book! May God continue to bless you, Jeremy and your sweet little girls.🤗

[@amandanicole3999]

I cannot wait to read this book! ❤ im so happy for you

[@SNOWCAPS-n4b]

That's why im an Introvert.

[@addie-eileenpaige6460]

Good for you, Jinger. I can totally relate since I'm a people pleaser. I can't wait to read your book.

[@NicoleYoshihara]

Love you Jinger ❤ you are amazing, beautiful, intelligent, brave, and courageous ❤ God Bless you always ❤ So saddened by these people hurting you 😢

[@Hidinginyourcupboard]

Good for you Jinger, we all knew you were kinda special ;)

[@marymilligan5819]

Jinger, I am the same. I feel that's why I have so few friends that are close.

[@MomLuvs2Collect]

So glad your confession is not bad news! Sounds like an awesome book 😃 this is going to sound odd but on this vid you came across as such a natural on camera 👏 reminded me of a reporter or actor 👍 dare I say there might be a movie in your future 🤔 of course only if you ever wanted something like that 😄 God bless you and your family 🙏!

[@leahsmithtravel]

I relate so much to this ❤ excited to read it! Will you be doing an audio book version?

[@TeaDetox]

I relate. However, I brushed things off thinking I was being strong. It's not being strong, it's being weak. Your brain will catch up to you and break you..

[@shinynickel29]

That’s a trauma response not people pleasing.

[@larae75]

Good for you; you go, girl! ❤

[@richbernard3760]

My parents raised us to protect ourselves...Im a people pleaser but I simply have given my life to God. My life is better bc God is a part of it!

[@janetsplace778]

You do great! Proud of you!

[@robynwilliams5928]

Can’t wait to read your new book. I was raised by very bullying parents, relatives, siblings, etc. it took me a very long time and o be able to get over making people happy.

[@louise7552]

I hope you have the strength to stand up to your husbands controlling you. You have moved so many times, lost your beautiful home you built because your husband never wanted to work, and put HIS needs before yours and the children to continue studying non stop.leaving you as full time carer and income earner. You lost your home, because the mortgage couldnt be made, and i know this must have broken your heart. Jinger, you have rights, self esteem, feelings and your faith. Remember everyones husband is their partner, NOT their dictator. ❤❤❤ blessings to you sweet lady.❤❤

[@alphapowersports3412]

This is ME!!!!

[@alphapowersports3412]

I am going to get this book for myself! Thank you!

[@aferguson5403]

TY for honesty.

[@reetayoung]

I've kept my mouth shut too many times too: silence when I should have spoken up

[@susanmunoz7688]

I also have been a people pleaser.

[@davyrantucci]

Way to go! Sounds like a great book. ❤

[@triciamessenger503]

Jinger, like you so to speak I'm a people pleaser too. I don't like doing conflict I want to keep everyone happy and safe . I worry about making other people angry upset or any of those other things but I've also learned it not everybody is going to like you and that's okay because there's some people in the world that I don't like either. I'm really proud that you're writing a book about this because I would love to read it and see if it could help me. Congratulations ❤ so exciting for you!! God bless you and your family as you have a beautiful family. I watched your show 19 kids and counting and the shows before that and even after that. ❤

[@janicekirton8670]

Jinger the older you get the less you will care what others think. ❤️🙏🏾

[@adrienne5836]

Wise words! Thanks for sharing your heart with us!

[@karenkassens9198]

The bottom line: we ALL come out of childhood with issues. Everyone has had bad experiences and we need to deal with them in our own time and in our own way. I believe God allows that because He wants us to turn to Him, He wants us to need Him. He doesn’t need us, but He desperately LOVES us and wants us to love Him and go to Him for all our needs. I was abused and neglected as a child and raised with false beliefs; however once I became an adult I had to, over, time deal with all that. Celebrate Recovery is a wonderful, Christian organization that can help anyone that cannot afford counseling. We need God in our lives more today than ever before.

[@eleanor4330]

You’re awesome Jinger. I’m a people pleaser too. Thank you!!

[@juliannesmommy6694]

It sounds great, Jinger!

[@awesometaylor5881]

❤😂🎉Absolutely 💯 Beautiful. Yes. People pleas8ng. Wanna copy pf your book. Congratulations 🎊 to you and Jeremy and Your Bright future.

[@saraj3949]

I’m so excited! This already looks amazing 🤩 When will Pre-Orders be available?

[@kinkycoiled]

It says you can pre-order today

[@throughfaithandgrace2970]

i love you Jinger! you are so inspiring.

[@amandanorman5682]

So freaking excited for this!