I’m Completely Exhausted and Want to Give Up on Life

[@liketearsintherain832]

This is amazing.. I have faced this for years. I turned 50, and my body fell apart.... loneliness is right on as well.

[@Btn1136]

Check your T

[@liketearsintherain832]

@Btn1136 I did and the doctors says it's fine..

[@henokhsatrio8804]

​​@@liketearsintherain832 I'm 35 and my body and mental fell apart too. I fell like I can't continue anymore. Doctor said the same thing. They only give me medicine without explaining anything. Some of them just said it's only my sugestion.

[@rosannaburgess714]

Don't give up my friend, I love you❤ and God loves you more. Change your thought processes. You matter more than you realize.❤❤❤

[@liketearsintherain832]

@@rosannaburgess714 thank you.. I.truly appreciate

[@chrysiarose]

I am seriously considering selling everything, settling my lease, and driving away, going nowhere for no reason. I'm overdone.

[@biolife3274]

Do it, except have a reason. I did the same thing. I think it would have been better if I figured that out first. What do you need that you don't have.

[@TheLuxeTraveler702]

Same here . Im sick and tired of being sick and tired.

[@marycarricaburu3683]

Give yourself some time. As Dr. John says, and I paraphrase, Run to something, not from something.. I don't know your situation, so all I can do is generalize. Get some counseling of some type. Maybe a career counselor, or a family therapist. Maybe just go back to old fashioned family values, like telling kids NO and disciplining them. Try to figure out what you want to do first, then develop a plan. Just getting a plan together sometimes is all it takes to feel better because you don't feel trapped. (I am talking to myself here) In the meantime, lots of HUGS.

[@tinalindsey1598]

Dr.John you are awesome.

[@mariaregas2393]

I have had that thought recently too just grabbing my dogs and getting the heck out of dodge.

[@dwilson6769]

I'm in awe that a man is asking for help. It's nice to hear a man ask for help to keep his family. He's not running to another woman, cheating or running away. A man, asking for help! Loved this!❤

[@sylviaAguenther-zc9lg]

Hi there, I just wanted to let u know how spot on your post is, I 💕it!a real man,( not running away) ✌️🦋

[@dwilson6769]

@sylviaguenther-zc9lg reminded me of my dad. My mom didn't know pain. I now, do. My dad had a great paying job. Then he got hurt and my mom had to work. The house burned down, my dad's ex tried to rake him over the coals, the family courts helped his ex just destroy him and my mom had to be part of that suffering. My dad deserved so much better, but so did my mom. However, men don't get the help they deserve. It's incredible if people had my pain for over a year and were forced to work during that discomfort how blessed they'd feel with just the basics. People can't be pleaded but they can be humbled and reminded. I was put in an uncomfortable journey by God too. I hope someday we can all learn from each other about life. Money isn't everything when you're down and out. People are who come to help you get back up again. So when there's no one there what keeps you strong? Experience. I hope my experience with what this man is going through and other women know keep going. Pray to God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. It's really hard because its so exhausting but when you're settled and listening, you'll feel it.

[@mereditharmstrong9054]

Amen. I hope he levels with his wife so she can appreciate him more.

[@FrancisTankana-jw6of]

Guy needs to get laid is all .

[@JenJen_88]

Yes ! And also not blaming anyone else.

[@lorrainelaeng3116]

This young man just made me understand what I do to my husband of 35 years. When he comes home tonight & every night thereafter to thank him and love him more. Thank you!

[@ellenmcintyre1247]

What happened to giving your husband or wife a hug when they come in the door and saying how was your day? And being honest about it? And sitting around the dinner table. five kids is a lot. But you know we're all doing the best we can and everybody needs to respect that and say thank you for being here and for doing your best. One of the things I regret about my mom who is no longer here is one night she made dinner and put too much thyme in the rice. And I mentioned it more than once while I was eating it. You know she didn't have to make it at all. And she didn't never make it for me again by the way. Because I was ungrateful that I had food on my plate that I didn't have to fix and I didn't buy in the first place this is as I'm looking back 20 years later. I'm ashamed of myself that I did this & it bothers me to this day that I did not appreciate her efforts. She was in pain every time she stood up. Why didn't I appreciate her more?

[@taraquo]

That young man just helped two people.❤

[@cholieandresa]

amen, this made me IMMEDIATELY turn over and kiss my husband, remind him how important he is and how thankful I am for all the hard work he does. Definitely going to correct my behavior and focus on healing myself some more. My husband comes from a wildly different upbringing, so my “why didn’t you….” “You should…” “how come…” reactions to his helping out need to stop. I just can’t get the thought of “how would I feel if I saw my sons wife act to him how I act sometimes” I SHOULD have been thinking this way already. Thank god I have the ability and time to change this

[@cholieandresa]

@@ellenmcintyre1247I have this same pain, guilt and shame in my heart for ways that I treated my mother as well. There is one moment I regret so much. She wanted to take my kids to the movies, (approx 6&7yrs old) it was raining out pretty hard and I was nervous. So I declined for her to take them, to her face, in my living room. And I will never forget the look she gave me. I still can’t watch that movie.

[@titifash74]

Well done ma'am..I learnt that too

[@luckylifer5174]

As an engineer myself, this hits home in so many ways. I quit my job a month ago due to loneliness, despair, and a work environment that hurt myself. I decided to move home to be with family, and to try to repair the broken relationship with my dad, but every try I've made hasn't worked because I've been thinking as a problem solver instead of a relationship builder. I've sacrificed my home, my privacy, my community, and my church to try to fix this and find connection, and I've failed to do it the right way. I'm mentally exhausted as well, and not knowing where my future is going, it's been nearly a year where I haven't been able to breathe. I'm going to reach out to a friend to help me clarify my priorities and move out of this situation. I hope I can find some way of returning to normalcy, because this season is killing me man. If anyone reads this, please pray for me. My name is Jaden.

[@Crew4Life]

Jaden, sending you a warm hug from North Texas and yes I am going to pray for you.

[@donnafontaine2799]

Jaden ...many prayers for you from me and my family outside of Boston

[@sandrab.3538]

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Lord, wrap your arms around your child, Jaden. Give him courage and inspiration for each day. Amen.

[@drewdelaney4166]

I just quit my federal job over the same reasons you did. Contemplating moving back home to be closer to my family but have no idea of my future and where I want to go or what I want to do. I’m a veteran and suffer from severe ptsd and everything I know career-wise and qualify for I do not enjoy whatsoever. No kids and single 36 years old. Not anchored into anything. Maybe I should join the circus

[@prosperousk5477]

Sending love and peace Jaden ❤️🙏🏽

[@jwise7777]

Anxiety brainfog is a real thing. Anxiety can make it hard to think clearly, further exacerbating the mistakes.

[@jayhanson-hs5vg]

i know

[@Uteria_888]

​@@jayhanson-hs5vgit effin sucks bro

[@Portia620]

I had no idea anxiety causes brain fog! I like brain fog helps me get rid of anxiety! 😂😂😂🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️. The problem is working. Is an issue with brain fog

[@heavychains]

Poor guy. You can tell nobody in this man's personal life asks him how he's doing or listens to what he has to say/think. Once he got the chance to open up to someone who was listening he just spilled his guts. Hope he's doing better ❤️

[@jamaelbaskerville4547]

He is a man that’s just how it is

[@Iararawr]

Oh wow you pointing this out brought tears to my eyes

[@crossfitruston3632]

That’s how most good men live. We slowly die, part by part over years while we put our wives and kids first. The only time men get flowers is when we die, because regret is more powerful than gratitude.

[@jennifermarie8707]

Happens to this woman, too​@@crossfitruston3632

[@desarc6855]

@@crossfitruston3632 well, if you put on the brave face all the time people do not notice you struggle. preserve your mental resources, take care of yourself. remind people that you need it.

[@andrewheffel3565]

Rick is awesome. He is carrying a heavy burden. His reaction? To be the best husband and dad possible. He deserves joy.

[@rhoweiss539]

I love and respect Rick SO much,....and I've never met him. What an amazing guy. I dearly hope his wife understands what she has in him and appreciates him and TELLS him.

[@TheDoreeni]

No No no no no no no no C

[@realHampson]

deserve is a woman's word

[@blueStarKitt7924]

He does.😔

[@blueStarKitt7924]

​@@realHampsonOk.(??) What term to use instead?

[@samanthaquant7411]

What an incredibly GOOD man. You can tell he loves his kids and wife and just wants to serve them. He’s doing his best and feels like he’s failing everywhere. But he’s absolutely a HUMBLE and good man.

[@Portia620]

The best ones!!!! Diamond that’s are hard to find!!!!

[@TheLuxeTraveler702]

I feel the exact same as this man. I'm physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted and have no one in my corner.

[@marycarricaburu3683]

You have us. Feeling trapped is the worse feeling in the world. Reach out to someone.

[@KT2005]

Don't give up! Give it to God.

[@prosperousk5477]

Hey maybe we could be travel buddies!

[@marycarricaburu3683]

How are you doing? it has been a couple of months, sine you posted this, are you doing better?

[@MattCasters]

At some point it's hard to even reach out to the people who you think would undoubtedly support you and maybe even said they would support you ... but it's just too hard since you're physically, emotionally and mentally exhausted. I've been there and I've done that. I don't have a magical advise except a few cool things I heard and which helped me: do the smallest possible thing you can think of which would help you. That little thing could be very hard to do so pat yourself on that back if you do it. Feel positive about it. Another thing is: carve out time for some physical activity. Go for a walk for example. Even if it's just a really short distance, it seems to help.

[@imanisteele1920]

I pray I meet a man of this caliber someday not so far off... His honesty, vulnerability, deep abiding love for his family, his drive to figure himself out, leaving no rock unturned and rising up against the very human desire to quit is just incredible. A true man of value. Bless you and your family.

[@Smellyfupa]

theres plenty of us out there

[@TheSleepy1326]

💚💛❤️

[@WillStephensArt]

They are miserable

[@thedadyouneverhadchannel3544]

We’re everywhere

[@TheDiamondEdge1]

I never found a guy like this. I tried. Married for 17 years and he cheated with his secretary and blew our family apart. This was 8 years ago and he still won’t talk to me about our kids. Sad

[@KennTollens]

I grew up in a negative critical family. They don't have to say you suck, I grew up feeling worthless. I never realized how negative I was until I moved away for a long time and was around more positive people, then revisited.

[@jarkachalmovianska7812]

Yeah. And the worst part is nobody is worthless. And some people are really good actually. But no matter how good you are and how much people tell you how good you are, once you grew up feeling worthless you always will feel you suck.. its a long road

[@Justdugo]

Same and agreed with the previous reply. It’s a long road to unlearning and relearning

[@sabeenie21]

Same thing happened to me. You’re not alone!

[@blueStarKitt7924]

Yes 😔

[@thezionlifestyle]

You're doing Awesome

[@noregertsyamsayin8011]

Most people feel this way and don't have 5 kids. Props to this dude, he's doing his best with the cards he was dealt.

[@Teenywing]

I have almost the exact situation of this guy. 48, (mom) 5 kids, (3, 7, 10, 17, 21) cook and clean and play with kids 20 out if 24 hours a day. I just want to sit in my closet and cry so my kids won’t see me. I’m just so exhausted with the whole thing- but when the mom says it, she is badd. When the dad says it- everyone thinks he’s great. It’s so sad.

[@Jkaye13]

@@Teenywing It's not a gender thing.. parenting is hard no matter what gender you are. Both parents work and share responsibilities.. it's a lot and most of the time the parents are completely exhausted and don't have the time or energy to focus on the marriage and their relationship.. if spouses come together and take time for each other and support each other, really communicating about what they need from one another and building each other up, helping each other and working as a team.. it makes all the difference.. raising kids is the most exhausting work ever and there isn't an instruction book; we have to navigate it together and that takes work. I had five kids and homeschooled.. l was exhausted and look back and wonder how I did it. I agree with John.. this husband needs to come together with his wife, he needs to hear that what he does matters.. he does not suck! So sad that he feels this way.. I get it because I didn't always do the greatest job supporting my husband, telling him how much l appreciated him and what he did for our family. Both these people are overwhelmed, and need to come together in support of one another. They also need to have time alone to 'date' ..something that doesn't happen much with five kids.

[@MrAlio101]

Not trying to be a d, but he didnt have to have 5 kids

[@SalernoOfficial]

The cards he was dealt? Having 5 kids is a CHOICE. Instead of “he’s doing the best with the cards he was dealt with” perhaps it’s “reap the whirlwind“

[@blondie7740]

There is a difference between blaming parents, and acknowledge that there is still pain points from your childhood that need to be resolved.

[@intentionalgreatness]

As a woman..I'm very thankful to the caller for sharing. I didn't realize the weight that men may feel at times trying to succeed at doing it all. There's so much stuff about women doing it all but this topic is not often touched.

[@sodvine3486]

It's true. They have a whole house on their backs plus a nagging wife at times.

[@bakester17]

Words cannot describe the amount of this that happens on basically a daily basis for many. Society said we can't speak on it, "be a man" etc.

[@alyssablase417]

I feel this as the woman

[@SarcasticaleeXP]

@@Living1232 A lot of people do including yourself, you would keep scrolling if you didn't.

[@TrueWalker88]

It seems lot more like women suck it up and do all these mundane tasks it while men don't. Only men have a greater need to be congratulated or encouraged for doing what they shouldn't have to be told to do. Every single couple I know has a dynamic where the women do more with the house and kids, and most of them also contribute just a much financially. Men are simply entitled and arrogant. They have been told all their life they can have it all without merit, want to be the king of their castle or go and have a whopping FIVE kids but they can't even do everyday tasks. The fragile male ego has always been around. They underperform but have an above average desire to be told how great they are. It is a lack of humility.

[@colinmackay92]

Rick it's been 2 years but if you ever see this I just want you to know. You're awesome. You absolutely do not suck. You're a Class Act.

[@peggythomason2100]

Praying for you. You are such a wonderful person.

[@theartofcrashingout]

Seconding this. His worth is not in his performance of any of the things he mentioned, it’s in his sense of duty and responsibility. This is one of the few calls that wasn’t all me, me, me. I hope he knows he’s not a burden and that it’s ok for him to take up space, and that he’s still valuable even when he’s standing still and not producing anything at all

[@AK20741]

Yup. Sounds like he's married to a narcissist who has had his entire self-esteem wiped out. So sad. Why do the decent med & women end up with utter A-holes

[@HorseLady1109]

I agree! His wife doesn’t appreciate him.

[@DariaHarruff]

​@@HorseLady1109 that's on her it's her problem not his

[@curiouslyme524]

This man is so strong & brave for reaching out for help & support. I respect him highly. I hope his family embraces him as he deserves!

[@caroneast]

I hope he opens up to his wife. I think she will be shocked at how undervalued he's feeling. He needs a big hug and needs to hear all the appreciation his family really feel for him. Never let those you love be in any doubt about how lucky you feel to have them in your life and avoid regret

[@rebeccaoprea9917]

We lose what we take for granted .

[@AnthonyAlvarado78]

I have...and the feedback was just as bad.

[@littleripper312]

The thing is too, men think that they will be looked down on when the reality is most women love the idea of their husband sharing feelings and talking about stuff like this. It's actually one of my favourite qualities in a guy. I hope we can reduce the stigma of men thinking they can't be emotional or feel anxiety. They aren't bloody robots!

[@Evil-Rod-Farva]

Unfortunately the overwhelming majority of women can’t or don’t want to deal with it. They say they want men who open up, but reality proves to be very different. You may want to hear struggles from your brother, your nephew, or your dad, but not your husband/lover. There are few things as a man you can do to turn a woman off more than being vulnerable. Myself and married men the world over can confirm this. What the caller needs like most American men is male friendship.

[@nephilimshammer9567]

@@Evil-Rod-Farva women say and do two.different things. His wife will not like him anymore. She will cheat

[@nancyberard6928]

My son was a very tiny sick premie, He didn’t speak until 3 .. He had every service available to him, IEP all the way to & thru college. He has been training at the age of 24 for the State Troopers…. He has been accepted to the 6 month State Trooper academy! I cry happy tears!! never ever give up on a special needs kid!

[@dianecelento4974]

Congratulations to your son. We need him. And no doubt you are a fabulous mother.

[@NeiveVeve]

This is an amazing comment. I have 3 special needs children, and 2 of them were very premie. It gives me hope. I know one day they are going to catch up to where they need to be. I feel it in my bones!!

[@MultiAnne36]

I realize this was 2 years ago but I'm so happy for you and your Son. How did everything turn out?

[@josefinagarza241]

​@NeiveVeve hope is good thing❤

[@janelleg597]

This guy is a legend. Even legends need rest, healing, and support! ❤

[@kclose85]

Something about this call really hit home. I hope this guy gets the help he desperately needs. My grandfather at the age of 49, who was a father of 3, committed suicide when my mom and her sisters were around high school age. I can't help but think that this possibly is similar to what he was going through. My mom said that the family never saw the signs and he never talked about his feelings or seeked help. God speed Rick! Good for you for seeking help. It starts here.

[@zuliahunt]

I thought the same thing. He needs professional help who can help him to talk about everything just like here; otherwise, he can quit one day over the sudden. I am happy he reached out. I hope dr delony will follow up with him to make sure he is safe. I think at this point it is became dr DeLong responsibility to make sure rick will get professional help

[@batirtzeurkiaga1716]

Very well said.👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@weekendnomad5038]

It makes me sad that people don’t take men’s mental health serious. I know work is stressful. His wife Sounds like an ungrateful nag. I understand she needs help too but she shouldn’t btch at him when he’s trying.. I make sure my husband has his outlets even encourage it because I want him to be ok mentally. He’s a wonderful husband ,dad and provider but work stresses him. I rub his back after work / try to be his safe place. Yes I need things from him and he makes it happen so he deserves PEACE . At the very least .

[@rameysavoie7442]

This guy is gonna be okay!

[@josefinagarza241]

​@zuliahunt this Dr is great amazes me❤

[@KjtheGreatPro]

Man dude the more I listened the more I felt nothing but the raw knife of empathy for this man.

[@spytechchronicles]

This is happening to vast majority of people all over the world. The impossibility of life.

[@katella]

But in the US people are working and living in a brutal, inhumane system working long hours with little support. Extended families are seen as something to get away from rather than support ststems. Healthcare, especially mental healthcare is horribly expensive and not available to everyone. People are expected to move away from their families and know all about raising children. They don't. How could they possibly?! Then it all goes downhill quickly.

[@katella]

@user-ob7zw7qr5o I don't live in the US, nor am I a waitress or have a minimum wage job, but I have sympathy for those people stuck in that system. As far conditions in the US being better than than those of North Korea, they are. But that doesn't mean that they are good, or even adequate.

[@laveniajohnson2283]

Men can be so stoic that we women often don't know they have emotions. I was shocked in my mid thirties to learn men actually had feelings because I'd never seen them expressed.

[@tamararagerart2344]

Decision fatigue is a real thing. And I think a lot of people are suffering from it and don’t realize there’s so much going on. There’s no break.

[@rarebird_82]

Facts.

[@FortressofShred]

I'm 40 and so exhausted I feel like I have nothing left. Every time things start looking up and I start building I lose it all. Been spiraling for months. Finally got a hand on it, but it just feels like it's all for nothing. None of it even matters. I wanted so many things, now I don't want anything. What's the point of having anything if you can't share it with the person you love? Been lying to myself for months. 💔

[@RGB758Y]

If there's no love, then all these efforts mean nothing.

[@poppyz6816]

A supportive partner is so important, both ways

[@blueStarKitt7924]

Essential.

[@streetchronicles9025]

For most of us, even an unsupportive partner is unattainable

[@fred6907]

Sounds like his wife is an ungrateful person who constantly complains about everything. His life sounds like a nightmare. Had an ex like that, never again.

[@FaithwWorks]

we know that dang, don’t you understand if these women keep acting like they got the nuts 🌰 there’s going to be more great valuable men who stay alone & depressed. suicide rates only going up. no point in looking at the gender stats. mostly young men

[@SmokedApoundmyself]

Doesn’t exist anymore..

[@jason5265]

Glad to hear this caller. I feel this way a lot.

[@shuppslife5140]

Sending you love ❤

[@marycarricaburu3683]

Hugs

[@oaklandsoldier8520]

Me too

[@ruthyr.8070]

This is the most honest phone call. I appreciate the words of wisdom since I am in a similar situation. Thanks Dr. Delony.

[@honeychild1498]

I’m glad you were here to hear the call. This call made me cry. So glad thus guy was so vulnerable.

[@fdoeppen]

OMG, he is verbalizing the way most men are treated, the provider that everybody is expecting to only provide.

[@TheRjmsca]

I know you're burdened, but you don't sound like you suck. You are there for your family, you provide, and are looking for help. You're not running away. Thank you for not running away. God bless you

[@Portia620]

Agreed!!!!A MAN YHAY DEOSNT RUN AWAY WHEN GOIGN GETS TOUGh! Bless this man! 🙏

[@evah787]

Absolutely!

[@morganm1797]

This is a true man, a gem, a true soul. Hang on buddy! You are truly doing such a great job, for even calling in! What a gem!

[@thedadyouneverhadchannel3544]

Ever been a man? Then we don’t need your pat on the head.

[@maam-yj8ph]

This awesome man's tank is running on empty. Thanks Rick for being such a caring, loving husband and father. I am sorry that no one told you that your presence and willingness to serve are irreplaceable and much appreciated in this world.

[@arielrocks10]

17:22 17:22 17:41 and the k

[@alexandermcbrien264]

Yep that's it, it's like the average person out there has literally just given up. When you're younger you have dreams and aspirations to achieve great things but as you get older and the world just absolutely beats you down and you get caught up with your fears it all changes, most young people just haven't experienced enough disappointment yet in life to completely give up on their dreams.

[@Justdugo]

Yup

[@Ro4_]

Feeling unappreciated is the worst. I hope Rick’s wife and his children make father’s day more frequent, To appreciate this guy’s dedication to being a family man and so that rick feels a life of fulfillment and appreciation.

[@Sarah-ft8jr]

His wife doesn’t know how lucky she is. My husband and I have 3 children, our youngest is disabled. He literally just works and goes to the pub at the weekend. Doesn’t help around the house at all. I work full time too. I’m exhausted mentally. This man seems like a great guy who is very unappreciated.

[@Calladim]

I see this same situation in a friend's home. I don't know your husband but my friend's husband seems to have unaddressed and/or undiagnosed serious mental issues. Part of him knows he can only handle so much so he constantly self medicates. I don't believe any parents wants to be a bad one. I believe "bad" parents have issues they can't work through so they never love their children as they should. Talk to your husband from a place of empathy and curiosity. You'll get more out of him. Good luck.

[@Love.America]

Just like you unappreciated. I'm sorry. I hope something better for you.

[@froggythekid8955]

Shouldn't have had kids...

[@wendybryan6071]

You both need couples counseling. If he won't go, go for yourself. You're the only responsible adult in your marriage and you need more.

[@Melfukoff]

I didn't think it's fair saying he's unappreciated but it sounds like you are

[@KennTollens]

I felt like that until I started becoming a jerk. I was always doing what everyone else wanted and it felt like my wants were always on the back burner. Then one day, I decided to do what I wanted. It didn't make people happy, and I felt horrible about it. But I had to be okay with that. Over time, it got easier to do what I wanted without caring what people thought. It feels like the weight of the world is off my shoulders and I am finally free, and much happier.

[@ChrisJericho-yf4db]

Yeah it's true but this guy had 5 kids and when you have kids you have to prioritize them.

[@jujuoliver6959]

That's totally the depression that is making him feel as if he sucks at everything. He is clearly doing a really good job keeping everything afloat, but you just don't see that unfortunately when the depression hits you. It's just the worst at destroying the way you see yourself.

[@franciscoenciso435]

Most men live lives of quiet desperation. I wish him luck.

[@QUINTUSMAXIMUS]

It's harder and harder to be a man. We're expected to be Hollywood perfect. This guy works hard and his wife doesn't praise him. Would she prefer an alcoholic? He's honest. He earns his paycheck.

[@Bal3na]

He’s a giver but not a receiver ❤

[@Gamingtv23658]

Mine gets pretty loud... I yell loudly and put some holes in the wall I needed to fix. My desperation gets pretty loud. It shouldn't even be desperation... It should be prosperity

[@KenWang2]

That’s what they get

[@Gamingtv23658]

@@KenWang2 Kenwing, kenwang, kenwong... kenwingwong

[@juliemariariley3212]

I just want to wrap my arms around this father and tell him that he is enough- this gentleman is a man of honor and commitment. Please Rick don't underestimate the gifts you bring to your children and the world- keep talking, keep reaching out- you are valued and I value and respect you for your bravery as well as your compassion. Thank you,. 🌻

[@SK-tk6bi]

Your words don't mean anything. This man is going to keep suffering. He needs these words from people he is immediately related to. Not from you. But I know he most likely won't get it. Throwing words around on the Internet is cheap. Practically caring for another person is expensive.

[@juliemariariley3212]

@@SK-tk6bi I meant no disrespect and I apologize if I offended you. I actually agree with you that the love and concern need to come from those closest to him. I was just sharing my feelings and my heart. I have watched many friends suffer with depression- some who have taken their lives. I have been with people in the moment and through their suffering and struggles. That’s probably why I responded to this. I wish you well on your journey and thank you for sharing your response.

[@SK-tk6bi]

@@juliemariariley3212 I also did not really mean to get angry at you. I just know the frustration of reading supportive messages from strangers but not from people who are closest to you. You really intended to help the man, so I am sorry that I criticised your comment.

[@juliemariariley3212]

@@SK-tk6bi no worries 🌻 I didn’t take it badly- I could tell you were frustrated. Thank you for your willingness to share your thoughts and your honesty!

[@sunside7]

The world needs more people like you, Julie! ❤

[@TheAleBecker]

I'm stuck in my life. I'm in my dream college carrer, but if I don't keep my scholarship it's literally over for me. Yet I don't have the energy to wake up, to go to class, to study and I feel I'm withering away. I don't want to stop living. I just want this suffering to stop.

[@BrianGivensYtube]

I’m a 26 year old engineer and what I learned from work is that the better you do, the work you get. Being stressed everyday and having a never ending amount of work caused me to burnout only 4 years into my career. You have to drop everything and heal. Take time off work and treat yourself like a god unconditionally. Buy filet mignon everyday. Get 12 hours of sleep a day. Travel to a forest and hike all day. Sit in the woods and listen to the wildlife. Close your eyes. Heal.

[@susanlosey9511]

Why isn’t his wife supporting him? 5 kids and one a special needs child. He helps around the house and gets crap in return. Shame oh her. He’s a gift from God .

[@marygonzales9808]

​@susanlosey9511 He doesn't say but who's with their special needs child all day while he works, probably her. She may be over whelmed also.

[@summersojourner]

@@susanlosey9511she’s exhausted too.

[@sparklesp9304]

​@@susanlosey9511She's probably tired too. They have five kids. She may need to go back to work, and they hire a housekeeper and a cook to prep meals.

[@kamillahoset2602]

This is so true! As an engineer you may be the smartest person in the room, but you’ll be treated like a doormat. Do all the thinking, problem solving, the stress, the work. While the others talk, travel and dress pretty. And decide everything. As an engineer you’ll have to take care of your self worth on your own.

[@tinalindsey1598]

I can’t imagine the anxiety I’d have if I had five kids and one of them special needs.

[@RachelSings21]

My brother has 4 and one with special needs. He runs on high stress 100% of the time 😢 I worry about him

[@markbrey52]

which is why you need to re-consider having more than 2 kids. For these reasons. You can't be spittin out more than you can chew. Hurts you, AND the kids!

[@shuvra-kumar-das]

​@@RachelSings21 check on everytime

[@josefinagarza241]

​@@markbrey52I have an only for thus very reason,single parent, it was brutal, but my spiritually kept,keeps sane❤

[@AnnaHedlund-c7t]

People put them self in these situations. Why?? Doesn't mean i feel sorry for him. But it's hard to raise children.

[@gscrawford74]

Dude is living my life. I find myself praying when I go to bed I don't wake up. All people want from me is what I can give them. Including my family.

[@scratchy271]

I am tired. Just tired. Physically , mentally , and spiritually. I can relate to this man. I'm 52 , kids are grown , getting old , and have regrets. I do not want this guy to end up like me. He still has time. My time is done. I have to live with the consequences of living most of my life in quiet desperation. I have to live the rest of my life knowing that I do not have a do over. In the end you are all alone and do not take anything with you. All you have is what you have given. I hope that my gift I leave is good

[@Btn1136]

Trt bro

[@fatamaislam5157]

I am praying for you and I hope everything gets better!!! 52 is still a good age to go after what your heart desires!!! Give it your all starting today and everyday!!

[@TryNSave]

You’re still relatively young at 52. You can be 53 and still be in the same boat, or you can be 53 and be someone who’s making changes. It’s daunting, the prospect of doing a complete about face overnight. But that’s not realistic. Instead, make small, incremental changes to your routine every day. We all have regrets, but often times that’s due to comparing ourselves to others. If that’s you, stop it.

[@KathyM1611]

53 is young, you can make changes. God bless you.

[@katiesimpson8517]

I do rescue. Dogs are great. They appreciate all! They love unconditionally. Plus, walking them is great exercise & you meet other "doggie people." What's not to love? Check it out...

[@ducethe2nd246]

Holy cow as a young engineer who just wants to be happy with my job and family my biggest fear is finding myself in this situation

[@Ja50nkAt]

Men are expected to suck it up and get on with it while emotions take a back and seat and after doing that for years or decades it all hits like a Mack truck in our 40' and 50's.

[@harlan5339]

But heres the thing, who is telling yall not to have emotions? Thats the issue.

[@RodneyBost-gw6eo]

​@@harlan5339women society

[@sylviaAguenther-zc9lg]

@@harlan5339 hi there, liked your reply spot on, but many men forget that life is not for U to struggle on your own this is why God has made a wonderful woman to help him through it! If of course he wants this✌️🦋

[@harlan5339]

@@sylviaAguenther-zc9lg if you can be emotional or cool with your loved ones, then what are you doing? Girls do it with their friends. Why do some guys feel they cant with their male friends? I can call all my friends and be emotional rn.

[@sylviaAguenther-zc9lg]

@@harlan5339 hi there, I believe this is what we in America call Manning up! being real,we all have our good days & breaking points as well but talking it out with someone U confide in thats Tough✌️ Real Human being 😉🦋

[@AtomicJerk84]

This dude is me (I’m also an engineer), but I only have two kids. Seldom do I even get a thank you for trying to be everything to everyone, and constantly putting myself last. God I’m tired.

[@anonymouse6703]

This one made me cry. I think this is an example of how men's mental health doesn't get checked or supported. Sometimes us women and wives think the guy can take on a ton of stress and be ok with it because they don't complain. I hope this guy got the help he needed and that their marriage is in a better place than when this call came in.

[@markbazikian]

Thank you for making this call Rick. I'm sure there are a lot of people out there that feel the exact same way but aren't capable of sharing

[@littleripper312]

Also a great call for those of us who might have our own Rick that we're not appreciating enough.

[@JabroniJimmy]

The level of sincerity and openness this guy has is refreshing

[@janea8093]

Rick is on autopilot. Many men are. The kids are too much for him and he’s literally drowning. They both need a break for a bit. He hates his job, hates his life, stressed out. Men. Goodluck to him. It takes courage to open up and even more courage to work on it.

[@littleripper312]

Johns doing such a huge service to men by normalizing talking about things like anxiety and depression as a male. So many guys don't even consider it a possibility because of how they're told their whole lives just to suck it up and be tough. I sometimes wonder if the statistic of women having higher rates of anxiety and depression is actually true or if guys are just under reported. It seems like a lot of men don't even entertain the idea so it's great John is bringing that idea to male listeners.

[@MarluART]

I did not expect to hear me 17 years from now in this guy. This hit realllly hard.

[@scottwall8419]

For sure. I kept thinking he's just a few steps ahead of me. Different details but headed at the same place to the same place.

[@ashleighthomas6571]

This is brutal! This honesty is amazing. He would literally drive himself into the ground for his family to save them, but it will destroy him. We give men a very hard time for not stepping up, but this is the opposite fault. “Rick, you are not a burden.”

[@jenniferarcher-bock9302]

Rick, so many people are rooting for you. You sound like an amazing and kind man. 🙏🌷

[@TheLifeJOGJourneyofGrowth]

I know the feeling of being tired of life and not being excited about the future. This was me 8 months ago. You need healing and need to go to the root of your problem. Go to therapy and start loving yourself. You cannot fix it by yourself. I feel like I am speaking to myself … I am an engineer too and tried to fix everything and I couldn’t. I finally quit my engineering job because I was no longer excited about going to my dream job. Despite the money and the financial security and a beautiful family, I contemplated suicide. Thanks to my wife for being my side through the relapse and detoxing. This is a journey man! Today, I am healing and living my life. I am spending time with my wife and kids and I am taking my hands off of control and problem solving. You got this! Good luck man!

[@luckylifer5174]

Thank you for your advice, I'm in the same boat and it's good to see there may be a light at the end of the tunnel.

[@zeal4god402]

YAYYYYYYY

[@asmrfoodieuk7965]

Therapy is all about the past and we can't change the past so what exactly did therapy give you in order to heal you? Sounds like some BS to me.

[@Desmond-Dark]

@@asmrfoodieuk7965 Therapy is def overrated, but it IS useful in SOME situations.

[@asmrfoodieuk7965]

@@Desmond-Dark it's only useful in teaching others how to treat other people, to navigate life for those who have zero self awareness.

[@paperladycreations-albumsb7955]

Thank you to Rick for making this call. I went through burnout due to obligations to my elderly grandmother and my aging parents. I was angry, mentally exhausted, irritable, and sick of life. I am doing better but still has work to do on myself. Good call Dr. John

[@AlexisLynn10]

I can relate and its nice to know I am not alone! Children arent the only path to burnout.

[@rebeccaoprea9917]

Depression can be a signal and we have to listen to that signal . We don’t just bury it some more . What we bury grows . I too have considered just down sizing completely and moving away . I’m over the rat race of life .

[@SS-lg7hq]

It’s possible he doesn’t even really know why he is suicidal. From experience, sometimes it’s just there. Sometimes, you’re just exhausted, you just don’t want to deal with life anymore and it’s hard to pin down exactly why. With that said, if I were his wife, I would absolutely want to know if he is feeling this way so I could be there for him. I hope he does open up to his wife.

[@littleripper312]

I was put in the special needs class for people who were mentally disabled or with severe learning disabilities. My parents took me out and offered me support and I harassed teachers and other students to help me when I needed it. I ended up getting straight A's in college and got my CPA certification for Accounting. Turns out I had dyslexia and it just wasn't well known back then but with support I was able to function and succeed.

[@giovanapc1]

Good for you! Happy to hear about your success! :)

[@smitty1218]

To anyone out there struggling, keep pushing! Anxiety/depression is a struggle but every episode we go through makes us stronger to bear the next episode

[@rosesnow2013]

Goodness me Rick is a good guy. He’s the kind of guy that anyone in relationship with him is so lucky to have. I hope he can see how great he is

[@emiliosemporium3977]

My former colleague committed suicide this summer. He had heart for service worked with at risk youth during college and became a school counselor. He was the best of all of us. This guys call resonates with me so much! Some weeks are a battle but I’m slowly feeling better. I’m drinking less, talking to my wife and reading my bible. Stay strong brothers ❤

[@lauriee5200]

Rick! Do you have a brother??? It’s sooo refreshing to hear from a GOOD MAN!!! I don’t think you have any idea how many others feel the same way too. Our society has pushed men past the point of no return. I can’t even imagine what it’s like to be a man right now. Attacked from all sides!The pressure is astonishing. Hang in there Rick.

[@lochan8180]

2021 was the hardest, darkest time of my life. I was physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually BROKEN. But now I feel genuinely GRATEFUL and BLESSED that I had to go through that phase because GOD has graciously REVEALED Himself to me in miraculous ways. I am fortunate that He allowed me to know Him at a very young age, but this year is SPECIAL because of what WE (yes, GOD and me) have been through last year. He showed me how POWERFUL prayers truly are when I started to focus on WHO HE IS rather than who I am, on WHAT HE CAN DO rather than what I deserve. The experience was MAGICAL. He showed up BIG TIME and assured me that HE is indeed a LISTENING and RESPONDING GOD. Oh how my faith has skyrocketed as a result! Now more than ever, I have very bright HOPE for my future because I personally experienced how RELIABLE God is. And for that I will forever be grateful. GLORY BE TO GOD, MY EVER FAITHFUL FATHER. ♥️♥️♥️ To everyone who's struggling right now, please know that GOD LOVES YOU. He wants to help you and give you peace. Please surrender your burdens to Him and allow Him to move in your life. "Because he loves Me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges My Name. He will call on Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him." (Psalm 91:14-15) Please hold on to this bible verse because WHATEVER GOD SAYS, HE FULFILLS. ✝️

[@stephaniecarleton3117]

Rick need to have fun and have a little more joy everyday. Everyones rooting for you.

[@tammybradshaw7175]

Mercy..."We're dying younger of diseases of despare." Deep!❤

[@k.frances8971]

Everything about this hit home for me. More than I ever realized. This guy is me!

[@abrahamrivera2818]

I resonated with this call so much. I don’t have kids yet, and I already feel overwhelmed. Trying to support my wife through school, help my parents, guide my brothers, keep our family business going, perform at my full time job, get out of debt. I’m exhausted and this call helped so much. Thank you Rick! Thank you Dr. D!

[@Bal3na]

A person who thinks they suck at everything is actually the best at everything ❤

[@Rae2492]

The Western men are suffering.

[@strajearocks11]

So true. Those who are trying to get it right already have it right bc they are always trying to achieve perfection. God bless all who are feeling they aren't doing anything right but keep on going. That's real bravery when you don't want to do something but you do it anyone

[@Antgwin]

Tears are streaming down my face for this man and skis myself. I am this man. Everything he says, does & feels I do.❤

[@kylemedeiros6907]

Call of the year. This is a genuine good man. We need more Ricks. Bro please heal. You owe it to yourself.

[@haidersheikh3887]

Absolutely legendary phone call. And hate me for saying this, but this call was above John's pay grade. The caller just came from a deeper place than John was either willing or able to go.

[@jansilloway325]

I pray he gets some help. He’s so awesome and responsible and on the brink of a huge crash. I know.

[@salmanella1275]

I swear I feel exactly the same as this man. And this morning I’ve felt like I quit I can’t do it anymore..just tired and exhausted…and nobody cares…

[@michaelcafaro4022]

I feel the same way and don’t have a wife or kids.

[@DriversFromHere]

We are so many to feel this way. Sadly, we barely share and hide, we rather expose fake garbage in social media… In the mean time, we all see other men pretend they have everything under control, until we reach the breaking point of no return !

[@thezionlifestyle]

I Testify to you that things can get better, You are Loved by a Heavenly Father, and if you don't believe that, know that I Love You. I don't have to know anything about you to Love you and Appreciate your Existence and Voice on here. I hope your day is good today, I hope this year gets easier for you. You're not Alone in this.

[@Bal3na]

Sad truth is no one cares Kas they all on same page

[@jajhalperin2233]

❤

[@erikaletty]

Great call , very raw and honest. So many of us feel this way and just feel hopeless at times . So glad he reached out and hope he gets help

[@AubreeFusselman]

This man is really in tune with himself. I’m impressed.

[@walljos314]

I’m the same. Engineer with 2 non verbal autistic children. My wife and I are physically, emotionally, mentally exhausted. No support from family. I look at my future and feel hopeless and despair. I pray to God and my savior Jesus. I hear about endurance, patience, Gods love even during pain, all joy when you fall into diverse troubles, sanctification, you’ll be rewarded in heaven, pain and remorse today is minimal compared to the glory later…and over and over. I’m tired, I’m frustrated, and I’ve had it. Then, I wake up and it’s another day. I hear God asks us the same question everyday: Do you trust me? It’s getting harder to say Yes.

[@thatsawrap8]

How are you now? Praying you find some relief from the burdens of your mind. You've got this

[@romaniamyland6191]

so sorry.

[@walljos314]

I hate my life. God set me up for failure. I wish I could scream at God to turn down the fire. I am saved by the blood of Jesus but I am drowning in life. Jesus will beat me up at the Bema. “You didn’t trust me enough!”. I have failed God. I’m absolutely exhausted. My wife knows and she is exhausted. We have no grandparents to help. HELP GOD!!!!! 😩 😢

[@to_whom_would_we_go6285]

@@walljos314 I am taking care of my mother with Dementia. I have been at it about 7 years and recently had a breaking point. I have followed the Lord since I was young and this is the first time I have felt angry at God. He has allowed me to be in a spiritual desert for the last two years where I even questioned my faith. And yet, He is still with me and is renewing my strength. He has brought help and a new direction recently. How old are your children? Are there no government programs that can help with respite or therapy for your children? Can you reach out to the church for help? You are experiencing caregiver burnout and it can be so draining that it is hard to even think straight. I will be praying for you and your wife. Your comment really touched my heart and I wish you the grace and comfort of God.

[@KayMork]

@@walljos314praying for you now. I too have a special needs child. Understand totally.

[@amieeight9551]

Rick is a hero. So brave and honest. I wish him peace. ❤️

[@lisaeustace1181]

I really FEEL this man. He doesn’t seem to have any joy in his life and just feels drained. It’s hard to maintain relationships when you feel so utterly drained.

[@kateglastic9826]

Wow..I feel like this guy nailed how I feel very often. Sounds like an awesome guy that doesn't suck at anything to me.

[@essential_listening]

Thank you for not interrupting this caller or speeding him up.

[@rachelgooden9981]

Wow this is one of the best calls I’ve heard. John is on fire!!!!!!! Such bulletproof sound advice

[@JenLa8]

Wow. A kind and intelligent man who lives and breathes integrity, loyalty, service and responsibility. You deserve to be celebrated❤️

[@AFrick-f3m]

My husband of 21 years is so verbally and emotionally abusive for many years, and i cant get out of the relationship for many reasons. Im so broken and tired. Im done.

[@venturevlogz]

Be done and get out. He needs to grow more perspective on life by himself. He's crutching his problems on you. Stop taking it.

[@katsato3118]

I use to think that until I almost lost my life a long long time ago. Waking up in ICU makes you find a way. You call 211 and tell them your a domestic violence victim and you need help. There are resources and places out there. I with my kids spent over a month in a shelter and it took time to see my worth again and get back on my feet but I did it, women do it every day. Don't stay and waste your worth because you don't see a way out. I'd rather be penniless than ever in that situation again. I hope you're safe and find a way.

[@carypeltier8247]

Go to court, get your divorce and collect maintenance. You’ll be fine.

[@KOwens-ul6sy]

This broke my heart. This was/is my ex husband. Even the same career. He wouldn’t ask for help. He wouldn’t accept offered help. He wouldn’t take a break. I wish so much he would have let me, let me shoulder the burden, and then taken the break he needed. I’m so grateful to hear that there are men like Rick who, though terribly burdened, do the brave thing.

[@ezekiekr8475]

A little late, but This broke my heart! I have gone through something similar, and he lasted much longer than I did. Rick, as soon as you become honest with yourself and those around you, and if they are willing to listen, things will get better! Will be praying for you!

[@katrinatreetimmen39]

Every parent has felt the way you feel. Hugs man. Hugs. ❤️💛🤍🖤🪶

[@musicianship2]

I really appreciate this call from Rick. I am a single guy, 40 years old, but dealing with similar issues minus the kids. I tried to be vulnerable with the person I love the most about my depression and she told me I was pathetic. I really want to end things at this point. Nothing I do, the people I help or take care of, none of it seems to matter. Everyone seems entitled to me sacrificing for them. And for the one person who I look to for support to call me pathetic when I was trying to be honest and vulnerable for the very first time...well that just left me at a loss. At this point I feel like there is nothing left for me to live for. I'm either going to make a plan for recovery or a plan for escape and I don't know which one it will be. I want to keep living, but I don't see any reason to.

[@susanmorgan4151]

I hear you.

[@nuao88]

Dude get out of that relationship and start rebuilding from within

[@brianthornton8781]

I just want to say that you have to decide on what it is you are living for. Don’t put your value on that one person. You are not pathetic, you are more powerful than you can imagine. I love you and want to see you win in this life! You got this!! 😊

[@RourkeHikari]

I've never been on a relationship and I'm desperate for someone to love like that... But it I opened up to my vulnerabilities and what I got back was: "you're pathetic", I'd tell her to go kick rocks even though it will hurt. If she thinks that it's pathetic for a man to suffer, for a man to try his all for everyone and feel exhausted... Then she's not the kinda person I would want to give my heart to. I suggest you realize your worth and seek someone who will value you completely... Keep fighting man, you're not alone in this and you can make it

[@The_Generalgr]

Run away from that person dude, seriously. You’re not pathetic. Being vulnerable is not a weakness. Run from that person and find a community to share these feelings with.

[@smol_nerdy_dwarf]

Every man should ask for help like this, every man deserves to get help

[@lulusworld2703]

All this man needs is for someone close to him to say: " I value you", ""I see you...I REALLY see you". I think every human being needs to feel acknowledged. Because after a while if that doesn't happen it gets to a stage when you think "What am I doing if none of this makes sense anymore?" It is so sad that this man feels safer in calling in to someone he doesn't know on KZbin to speak about his needs than to those closest around him. This is what society does to people: it gives men and women the message that they need to carry so much by their own, that they don't want to feel like they are "burdening" others, when that is not the case. But I think it was the bravest thing he could have ever done! Rick, if you happen to read this I want you to know you rock and that I think you're a beautiful and special human being! At least you are wanting to claim this experience of being human and that is more than many are doing. What you did was brave and I can only imagine it took alot to do it. It's been 2 years and I sincerely hope Rick is in a better place!

[@donnalmich8398]

This man is certainly AWESOME, at sharing his feelings!!! Most men, cant/wont share their feelings!!! This MAN, is so WONDERFUL, because he cares about his FAMILY, 100%!!!! His family is so fortunate, to have such a CARING man, in their Life!!!! 💕❤️💕👍👏🏻🥇🥇🥇🥇

[@jeanlaubenthal698]

A smile from his wife and some appreciation might go along way.

[@rosannaburgess714]

❤😂 Yes it does, and it doesn't cost anything! That's why I smile intentionally at everybody I see in my daily life because I don't know what people are going through. I love people and love to see them happy, so I Smile.😅😅😅❤

[@jimmcd5660]

This caller sounds like one of the best humans there is. Sounds like a truly amazing person, I hope he is in a better place now and appreciated. I just left a relationship because of zero appreciation of my effort for 4 years straight. People suck.

[@Some_kind_of_wonderfü]

I just have to say, this call was a whole different level. I SO appreciated this man’s vulnerability and just saying it like it is! Don’t know him but so proud of him in just keeping it so raw and REAL! 🙏🏼

[@kaylaa2466]

I felt this hard. I heard how bad at I am at everything from childhood. So anything I do, I second guess, double check, triple check & still think it’s wrong. And it often is. I get this. This feeling sucks. I have a wonderful husband & a wonderful marriage, but I still feel like a suck at everything. I’ve recently found one thing in excellent at & it’s amazing to have that, but I still push all friends away & don’t stay connected. I really hope he gets the help he needs.

[@elusnuga]

This hits home so bad. I'm crying while watching this

[@ExjanaH]

My heart goes out to this man! Please know you are loved & you are important - even if you don't feel that way right now.

[@SayWhat1067]

What a good man Rick is. For anyone who suffers from a similar internal dialogue to Rick, I really recommend researching self compassion therapy. That internal dialogue that beats us down to nothing, needs to be challenged. We would never torment our children, partner or friends with that dialogue, but too easily we do it to ourselves. Take care friends!

[@goldilocks913]

Rick , I hear you. Your call helped me so much, the world doesn’t need you, it wants you my friend, go rest up. 🙏🇬🇧

[@nala9750]

WOW, this hits to close to home for me, I'm sitting here listening and crying.. Thank you caller, I feel this pretty much everyday, and it's hard, and tiring, and sometimes I also wish I could just give up.

[@clarebear1981]

He sounds exhausted. What a man to speak up and ask for help. You sir are the definition of STRENGTH 🙏. I hope and pray you get the support that you so rightly deserve. Thank you for allowing him to just talk. Prayers for you. You have 5 beautiful children that want and need you. Please do not give up. You are wanted and loved even when you may feel like you aren't loved. Those children are depending on you. They love you like you have no idea the love they have for you. I wish you the best happiness ❤