I've Had ENOUGH Of Self-Deprecating Natural Hair Videos.

[@4c_Hijabi]

You were so ahead of your time So many people will pass over this. The desire to contort our texture to the extreme opposite of what it is to satisfy a style is literally what blinds so many to seeing the error in their journey. 10:52

[@TheSweetestCocoa]

The fact that this video is 3 years old is wild. You were ahead of your time darling.

[@WeShareTheSameAffliction]

"Don't be angry when you're constantly met with a negative stereotype about your hair, when you contribute to it." THIS.

[@empresszoe9351]

Some people don't even have hair to complain about. Now that's really sad. Let's appreciate what we have and work with it.

[@burgundieroberts135]

Amen 👏🏾

[@felicia_716]

"Comparison is the thief of joy" - Theodore Roosevelt

[@annalishagoring]

So true

[@rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr631]

Lydia And Alma, NappyFu and Oba Yaa Jones are examples of 4c youtubers who don't do the self-deprecating hair videos. Thanks for this video. I agree with you on the self-deprecating talk. I can't stand it.

[@favouro6344]

I love nappyfu

[@MK-hh1vo]

I also like LaToya Ebony.

[@cooliohoolio30]

@@favouro6344nappyfu is so underrated, she's hilarious ❤

[@lemoncat9213]

Type 4 people are very eager to crap on their hair type. I was watching a video of Natural Hair Academia where she was moisturizing her hair. She was just taking down her braids, remoisturizing, and rebraiding it. It was a very relaxing video. One of the comments was something like "Thank you for making taking care of type 4 hair not look so tedious". All the replies were like "well my type 4 hair is tedious and its awful and I hate it" etc. There's not enough balance. We've had centuries of Black people hating our hair and maybe 5 years of positive natural hair content. That's basically nothing. The one time I was confident enough to wear my natural hair out when I was younger, my father went off on me and called me ugly to my face. He said "Where am I supposed to take you looking like that!?" I was 18. I had my hair in box braids 3 days later. When I wanted to get locs he told me not to because "I would look too ethnic and wouldn't be able to get jobs". I've had locs for 6 years now. I say that to say I get it. I understand how hurtful the comments are. But if I had to rely completely on external validation from friends, family, society for who I am as a person, I would have nothing. People have to grow into their confidence and their self-worth. Just don't actively crap on yourself and people like you until you get to that point. Negative self-talk is evil and I know that from experience.

[@13579hee]

@@yaobikuni1349 well.....tbh White people are gonna do what they want. We arent responsible for their actions The only think is racial pride cause SOMETIMES keep them on their toes

[@missdesireindependance5194]

The black community hates natural hair then cry about black women wearing relaxers and straight hair. Something needs to change.

[@AfrikanHairGod]

I just want to take a moment to express my appreciation for you and this video. Regardless of peoples' opinion, I think it would be rather disingenuous to say that this isn't a topic and discussion worth being had. Like you said, it creates a toxic and depreciative narrative that undermines what Black women and men have spent over a decade trying to rebuild and establish for the natural hair community. As creators, we all need to hold ourselves accountable to the content and the ramifications that are attached to them. Everyone's journey is theirs to be had and experienced, but to, intentionally, create content for the sake of self-sabotage of one's natural hair for the sake of views and exposure is something that I cannot and choose to not support or endorse.

[@meaninc123]

Well said Narada!

[@miniminott48]

Love you Narada!!!

[@lisabrightly]

Yes Narada! ❤

[@sedsa097]

Slow clap

[@sphanksjohns]

I absolutely hate when someone says good hair or bad hair. Hair is good period. Hair is beautiful period. Hair has a purpose. Just let it serve its purpose.

[@4c_Hijabi]

You were so ahead of your time So many people will pass over this. The desire to contort our texture to the extreme opposite of what it is to satisfy a style is literally what blinds so many to seeing the error in their journey.

[@LilianOkibe]

I agree with you; I am also tired of the pity party. I think the problem is that most of us compare ourselves to other people without really knowing their full story. Every hair type has challenges but we don't see people with other hair types constantly crying and complaining about their challenges. They find a way to make what they have work and others start to envy it; it is all about the mindset. I read a comment of someone discrediting what you said because she thinks that you're not "black enough". That is another problem; many of us are so comfortable in our pity party that we don't want to hear the truth and so we find flimsy reasons to discredit the person saying the truth. You hear things like, "Oh! You don't understand because your hair is not truly 4c, you're biracial etc." I have 4c hair with 99.999% shrinkage; my hair is so kinky that people with 4c hair question their 4c"ness", people jokingly call my hair 4z because of how kinky it is, I have no white in my blood and I can tell you that 4c hair is not "more difficult" or "less beautiful" than any other hair type. If your hair is stressing you out, it means that you haven't figured out what works for you or you're doing too much. Stop spreading this as the truth about 4c hair! I don't have a problem sharing struggles from time to time because I understand that it can be therapeutic to know that you're not alone but it becomes a problem when that is all you talk about. I know that people will say that it is the fault of the society/media that 4c hair is seen as "less than" but the so-called society is you and I; every time you say negative things about your 4c hair, you're contributing to the stigma around it. How about we do our part to make the "society" less toxic for our children?

[@louiscreed4026]

exactly ! and bad hair days are a prime example of that

[@louiscreed4026]

i should also mention another thing they're not aware of the fact that there's no real such thing as hair type anyway infect nor is texture consistent with hair type🥸

[@pamwill2884]

I remember when I went natural about 5 years ago; I had a coworker that told me they did not like my hair. I brushed it off and made the statement that my daughter had gone natural also and she told me of course my daughter’s hair would be beautiful because she had a different texture. We came to the realization that our God-given hair is good hair. Let’s celebrate each other and stop tearing each other down. Love the video Joy-el!

[@missdesireindependance5194]

When I went natural I had a friend tell me I couldn’t go natural because my hair was type 4 and my hair would be viewed unattractive to everyone. I’m so glad I didn’t listen to her. I’ve been natural over six years!

[@cintaminbunny]

I don’t understand how grown ass people can talk to others like that.

[@mariadavis1154]

Healthy hair is the best hair! Glad somebody finally said it. I can’t watch negative hair videos either…there’s enough going on out here in this world without that.

[@TheMspoodle2]

I know, right. I hate negative hair videos about type 4c hair.

[@mewmew6158]

This did need to be said, I do think you're further in acceptance than many people. I fully understand distancing yourself from people that don't already think the way you do about things like this because it truly does get irritating.

[@sixteen.candles.4644]

This whole video was therapy. I love my hair but the whole just bc no one sees your worth doesnt mean you dont have any resonated with me. Love u girl.

[@nomcebomthembu383]

Thank you for speaking on this 💖 Recently I've seen an influx of videos on social media of women with type 4 hair getting relaxers and when you look in the comments of these videos it's truly disheartening.

[@memefree3101]

I get what you are saying, but I actually like Starpuppy because I think her journey is honest. Sugar coating is more detrimental to those just starting. I think we all get to our level of acceptance at different times...at least they haven't given up. Her hair is flourishing and I think her positive outlook is developing.

[@SharmaineJoyel]

Exactly. She has a very beautiful, fun, and unique personality. I'm so glad to hear that her outlook is changing. I'm excited for her 💕

[@kammy7863]

No I believe her videos strike woman insecurities in a wrong way. Once you love your hair you cant look at self depreciating videos like a few of hers.

[@LoXena]

To me it was detrimental at some point. My journey was different, so at some point I did a 180 turn, stopped following her and other KZbinr for a while and I went in IG to find people who were truly in love of their 4c/4b hair. I flooded my account following hundred of 4c /4b hair Instagrammers. My hair grew a lot and was way more easier to handle due to my different approach, then I went back to KZbin. I said no to curls defining methods , no to gels, not to wash and gos, no to combat shrinkage. One day, I watched a Starpuppy video when she said she wanted to have control over her hair because of her job. I think this was the trigger for me, I started to follow actresses who have type 4 hair and they don't seem to over stress over controlling their hair. They often appears wearing an updo, shrunken afro or a twist out/braid out. ( Issa rae, Jessica Williams, Teyonah, Lupita, Shingai Shoniwa...)

[@bandaqueenlove9134]

No disrespect but that’s what Joy el addressed n the beginning of the video. She understands heavily that journeys are different and acceptance comes at different rates. She isn’t promoting the idea of sugarcoating because she video was very blunt at best. The issue is when you intentionally demean your hair is the problem. We all know our attitude towards our hair is on some continuum but some people r literally stuck in one place and it’s doing so much harm to them. I think her video is meant to give perspective just like those videos about their struggles gives perspective as well

[@graciousgrace7509]

As a fan and subscriber of star puppy, everything you said it's true, but look at the bigger picture, the title of that video "I didn't get good hair" was extremely triggering to me and I couldn't even get through the video. We need to represents ourselves better. The world is watching and how can we expect them to respect us if we don't even think much of ourselves?

[@kendrad9945]

This video is such a breath of fresh air. I agree with all that you're saying! Your hair is YOUR hair not someone else's. Appreciate what YOU have and work with it. My mom constantly tells me I need to do my daughter's hair. Her hair is ALWAYS done. I wash, condition, and twist and let it do what it do. She loves her Afro texture hair and I'm proud and happy for her, you and others who are ten toes down about embracing their hair🥰🥰🥰

[@mobettalady29]

This video changed the game for my hair ❤

[@choconethotcoco4717]

You are why I only watch channels of girls who have hair like mine! Watching girls with looser curls will only make you wish you had hair like theirs or feel like something is wrong with your hair. Besides looser curl naturals may use products that just don't work for your hair and cause frustration and resentment of your own hair. The best thing to do is watch girls with your hair type, don't compare your hair to theirs and develop a routine that works for your hair.

[@TheMspoodle2]

Me too

[@KudukUngol]

If some of us only watched youtubers with hair like ours we'd never watch any natural hair videos.

[@reiansandiford]

I think its important for alot of us with 4c hair and very dark skin to have people like Chizi who are honest about their mistakes and setbacks but at the same time promote self love. Her channel is all about positivity and promoting self confidence and loving our hair skin and bodies even though they might not always feel perfect. That’s honest and authentic and honestly she is one of the main reasons I kept up with my natural hair journey. She has always been honest about the mistakes she made and the things we should’nt be doing with our hair. Not everyone gets everything right right away. I don’t think you have watched enough of her videos to make broad statements like that.

[@apara2005]

I think starpuppy is awesome. I don't see her being negative at all. Not sure when you stopped watching her, but I get nothing but "I love my hair" vibes. When I start watching her she was frustrated with her hair thinning (which honestly I would too), but she worked sooooo hard over the last few months, and now, has it flourishing. I liked watching her journey. And even though I'm not having the same issue, I think her video will inspire others.

[@adwoamk8918]

All her video have very negative titles and thumbnails I used to avoid her videos for that reason, I was surprised when I watched her videos and I it was actually positive. I think they make these horrible thumb nails for clickbate, negative sells on the Internet. I Intially avoided this video too, for same reason. The natural community has become so toxic. I joined this community during the beginning stages 13 yrs ago, it was a positive environment, and its sad to see how things have become. I really think the people who can't accept their hair should jump of the bandwagon and just relax their hair,Gina curl , instead of the constant complaining.

[@smarti1144]

I don't find star puppy or chizi negative at all. These are some interesting takes in the comments.

[@ToyaF82]

Starpuppy is one of my favorites ❤

[@laurenlocd3180]

@@yaobikuni1349 anybody that doesn’t think she is negative are the people she is talking about in this video and is hate to be their man coming home to them every night

[@CaribbeanGlow]

3 years later this aged badly her "nappy to classy".thumbnail proves this video right.

[@Moriri_By_TshepiB]

I appreciate your honesty and openness. I also appreciate others (StarPuppy in particular) sharing their struggles and being open. Same as some people will say to someone who is suffering from anxiety and depression, 'just snap out of it, and if can't go cry in your room, stop spewing negativity and take accountability if you dont like it' when someone is open and honest about their struggles. You should never apologize for your opinion. You should only think carefully of how our words effect others.

[@Latte-girly90]

She doesn't have to apologize for anything. Joyel saying the truth 🙌🏾 don't bs us. Star puppy doesn't like her hair period, no matter how much she tries to convince us (and herself). She needs to be honest, its more than a struggle the girl hates her hair

[@bandaqueenlove9134]

exactly

[@Asia.Persuasia]

I agree with this stance exactly. Having the opinion that you want to have (or do have) is fine and dandy, but namedropping and demeaning someone who struggles with anxiety for not responding to a situation the way you want them to is something I do not agree with -especially considering that she (Joy-el/Sharmane) herself has gone through boughts of anxiety and negativity herself. Although I do not have Kinky or "Type 4" hair (I'm sick of this hairtyping sh*t anyways), I do support Natural Hair [Black women] on KZbin, from wavy, to curly, to kinky regardless. No need go call anyone out verbatim/specifically though...That's something that could have been done in private via Direct Messages or heartfelt emails...

[@glamglam8347]

@Indigenous Girl xo i literally cant stand how star puppy overreacts from setback. its so annoying seeing this lil girl just bash her hair to filth just bc its not doing what its not meant to do. its like watching someone treat their rose bush like a cactus. treating it like a disease that gets in the way like girl JUST RELAX IT if you really down bad like that ugh

[@kristinbenton9340]

I, personally, think the kinkiest hair types are the most beautiful! When it's well taken care of and growing its gorgeous!

[@Frangipani13]

After reading through a good amount of comments, some people really fight to stay stuck in sadness, negativity, miserableness, etc...so after you share how you feel over and over for years...then what? Your hair is still whatever texture it is growing out of your scalp, so what's next? There is a weird trend in our society now to fight staying down. Moving forward and acceptance is not toxic positivity. Anyways, love the video and this message was much needed!

[@macummings7818]

Yes!

[@denyshadials5702]

Beautiful said 👏🏾 what are all these feeling gonna do for you?? Absolutely nothing.

[@florencee3324]

All of this I don’t have 4c hair but I find this video empowering and come back to it often. It’s so strange how people are committed to being the victim.

[@stephgms5766]

Today’s the first time I’m seeing this youtuber. You are very pretty with very beautiful eyes and hair…. However, Starpuppy and Chizi Duru are two beautiful and positive women that helped me in my hair journey. Especially starpuppy. Today, thanks to these amazing and fun youtubers I have learned to love my hair the way they are. I do not know from what angle you’ve watched their videos, but I get positive vibes and self-love energy for their hair whenever I get to watch them. All they do is be realistic. They do not sugar coat their contents and I love that about them. I agree with you on sending out the positive message for our hair but let’s be honest our hair require quite some work to get where we want them to. There are some hairstyles that we want to achieve but fail to most times coz our hair can’t do what we expect. That can be frustrating but does not mean we do not love our hair. We do not use a magic wand and tadah it is perfect! No No!!… No hair is perfect. We need to work to evolve. 4c girls have amazing hair but it is the type of hair that just need a little more effort to keep them flourishing! Starpuppy reminds me of me. That’s why I follow that girl. She has this love-hate relationship with her hair but you know that the love part always takes over! the love is stronger than the hate (I wouldn’t even call it hate, I just can’t find a word for it)… That being said, I’m still making the decision of liking your video and following your channel because there is some truth in the things you’re saying and they make so much sense!

[@isa_virtual]

I truly understand your point, negativity it’s just not the right way but I feel like black women have more of a hard time accepting their hair, because of all the backlash we receive from literally everybody, so I understand the frustration they go through too. Overall if the change don’t start by us type 4 naturals, things will never work out/get better and that’s a fact. We gotta stop feeding the hate that the world already have for our type of hair. Let’s do some self reflection and try to do better next time everyone 🙏🏾 and also, I feel that is very important and necessary to point that out because sometimes we are so deep in our bullshit that we don’t even notice how negative we can be about ourselves.

[@christy7516]

I've seen the negativity and it's a no from me!

[@Latte-girly90]

So adding more negativity is going to help us???? We all have struggles but there's a line between that and being self-degrading. Joyel is right 🤷🏾‍♀️ you don't like your hair then say that

[@isa_virtual]

@@Latte-girly90 I didn’t say that, read my comment again :)

[@bandaqueenlove9134]

I agree! I really loved your last line because I feel like that's my issue at times. Also, I don't want to held accountable for other people's actions. I don't want to go on this journey to prove to those same people that demeaned my hair that I can grow it rather I want to go on a journey to have self-love for it. It can hard at times because what you think can actually be what others have thought about you, but you have internalized it so much that you can't see a difference

[@furrsmith8131]

Please enlighten me, what negativity have you experienced carrying your own hair?

[@laniiyahscott143]

I 100% agree with you. As someone with type 4b/4c hair, the thing I can't stand most about the natural hair community on KZbin is how many people on this platform say they hate their shrinkage. Shrinkage is an indication of healthy hair and shouldn't be seen as something to be ashamed of. Their excuse is usually centered in how they want their true length to be seen, which can play into texturism. I understand wholeheartedly. Thanks for sharing!🥰

[@DReid-ry9ff]

Totally Agree! I am so over black women and their hair. I'm fed up with the wigs, edges, and overall self deprecation. It's insanity. We need to practice self love. I have 4c hair and I love it!

[@Ang.143]

This! Girl I cannot watch most of these ppl! I’m so sick of seeing the hatred of our own hair.

[@nassaross3043]

😭😭😭😭😭

[@AD-cs6rp]

What do wigs and edges have to do with self deprecation or self love?

[@victoriasvibesss]

I'm dead. I lol'ed when you said its "insanity"

[@Pjweakly]

GURL. When you brought up star puppy I was like woah You hit the nai right on the head. This is why I don't follow her. I want to love her videos so much but couldn't put my finger on why I just didn't. I totally agree with you. Personally after getting locs I ACTUALLY fell in love with my hair. I LOVE my loose hair too. I was so sick of seeing the videos of why her hair didnt turn out right because of what ever ridiculous method that clearly wasnt going to work on her hair in the first place smh Its not just her too but she hurts the most for me personally because ive followed here for years. Im so glad that you addressed this. I wish the best for her and her self love. thank you so much for talking about just loving ourselves more Joy -el we really need to start accepting and loving who we are

[@laurawilliams4087]

Lol starpuppy struggles with her hair a lot. But she made a video a while back where all she did was leave her hair along for a month in braids and just added oil in her hair everynight and it started to grow! I'm like just do that but no she wants to do a bunch of other crazy stuff to her hair and then complain that its not growing instead of just embracing it. Maybe its for views

[@patb2582]

I know! She's annoying as hell. Like if you hate your hair that much, cut it off, lock it, relax it! Like it's just hair. I remember two years ago i was natural and living away from home. My hair was out of control and honestly made me fall into depression. So i relaxed and cut it. I will go natural again in the future but I'm fine for now. I refuse to let my hair control my happiness

[@luciaescobarz]

I experienced the same thing when I had locs. I combed them out eventually, but locs really made my LOVE my texture! O don’t know how🤣❤️❤️❤️ I love my loose 4c hair now

[@marianmcclean8050]

@@laurawilliams4087 for views and content.

[@sloppygirlz]

@@marianmcclean8050 that

[@starberrysweetee1495]

Yes! I really need to see more KZbinrs who are fine with their length, density, texture, etc because it’s exhausting seeing everyone trying to make their hair look type 3. It’s exhausting trying to follow along with all these products and whatever else. I really keep it simple and don’t see many KZbinrs doing that

[@melita703]

Everyone gets through their journey differently. Lessons can be learned even through the negativity. If venting, complaining, and crawling is what gets them through then let it be. As long as they continue the journey they are still helping the cause. What you said about not having to watch was on point. Maybe offering advice in a way they can accept will further help the cause. However, ranting the advice would be difficult for anyone to accept.

[@nicolettec6681]

I think people with 4c hair get this the most. People treat 4c hair like a disease that you were unfortunate to inherit. It has been a journey that I'm still on to try to love my 4c hair and I 100% agree that videos with persons constantly trying to manipulate 4c hair texture rather than learning how to love what 4c hair can do is quite depressing. Ive spent so much money on gels of all sorts to try to get a coils when my individual strands don't do that and it's so depressing when" defining your curl pattern " is that standard for hair. 4c hair people I'm sure have all gotten the you don't have good hair comment. Makesure your kids don't get your hair comment. Your hair would look better if you just comb it better ( after detailing all night) comment. I don't want to be in a relationship with you because I want my kids to have good hair ( comment) thus feature that we have is criticized to the same extent that dark skin is criticized but yet so many people don't understand the damage that it does to us with 4c hair and how much we also have to overcome. You are gorgeous and your hair is gorgeous. I love your talks about self love and you really are helping me like my hair. The channels you talk about are toxic. The only thing they do is make people with a loose texture feel "" luckier"" that they don't have 4c hair and make 4c hair people feel even more hopeless.

[@natalie3022]

The last sentence exactly.

[@christy7516]

The money thing yeah it's unfair, I have decided to become a heat styled natural because of this! I love my hair I just don't like wash and gos cause it tangled my hair a lot and my twistouts haven't lasted more than 4 days without looking old ..so as long as I take care of it I'm happy

[@denyshadials5702]

That second sentence too. Wow. Need people to breadth of what they’re talking about-stop normalizing this.

[@sadraolaedo4733]

Please I have 4c hair and I have NEVER GOTTEN the your hair is not good comment.

[@nicolettec6681]

@@sadraolaedo4733 So because it never happened to you means it didn't happen to me or other people???? The world doesn't revolve around you my friend. There are billions of people on this planet spread across many countries and cultures with many different experiences. Just be lucky that you have never had to feel this way and move on.

[@mercuryx6587]

THE CHIZI DURU COMMENT….100000% agree. I’ve had this thought for a long time about how judgmental and overly critical she is of 4c hair and other peoples hair in general, yet I think most of her 4c hair videos that include her own hair are discussing how it’s damaged or how to hide it or whatever the case maybe. Most of these people are starting to project their own hair issues and insecurities onto others and is causing the discussion of 4c hair to become negative. They feel so entitled to involve themselves into other peoples hair journeys and she is the prime example. She makes content after content criticizing other’s hair care routines or hair and can’t even maintain her own.

[@mercuryx6587]

Even if the “reviewing” she is doing of a hair care video she sees *is* positive (which I’ve never really figured out what she is inspecting or giving advice on considering she herself isn’t a professional or knowledgeable about all types of 4c hair) she always undermines the people she is reviewing or 4c hair in general (ex. Being over dramatic when a nonblack person learns to do their black child’s hair or adding comments about how they don’t truly have 4c hair/ their hair is too defined or too manageable) Like what do we gain doing all that?

[@christy7516]

Yeah when she did the I tried this routine series I became angry cause obviously styling methods differ and sometimes she wasn't trying!

[@lisabrightly]

Her hair isn't advancing at all. She only wants attention on KZbin. Her hair health doesn't seem very important to her.

[@laurawilliams4087]

I have the same hair texture as you and my hair is also long and thick 4c hair so trying to make it look 3c all the time is exhausting but I was addictied to the compliments and trying not to look crazy especially in white neighborhoods. But watching your channel and seeing you wear your 4c hair so naturally and look gorgeous doing it really is helping me build my confidence in my hair too. I really appreciate you and your videos. You keep it real!

[@areka1378]

I think that Starpuppy is just sharing her experiences about her hair and I do think that it's beneficial to other naturals in some ways because before her channel I've rarely seen anyone represent fine type 4 hair because most people assume that 4c hair is thick and coarse which isn't always true

[@sadraolaedo4733]

Have she ever met with a Trichologist? She needs therapy and need to do an inner work on herself?

[@graciousgrace7509]

Joy-el! I'm in my shower screaming on a Sunday morning. You went off and as you should! Please never ever delete this video. There has to be at least an evidence of one youtuber that unapologetically love their 4C hair

[@Baruch1girl]

In Starpuppy's jounery, she has confronted every negative thought, and stereotype about 4c hair. In her recent videos she has made peace with the beauty and texture of her natural hair. Most naturals have felt in similar ways about their hair when it comes to styling fails, too many products and searching for that next best method. I appreciate her growth and trasparency. We need to be tender to each other and respectful of others journey. ♥️

[@umayaswellcallmejesus1489]

🎤

[@lisabrightly]

She still doesn't know how to style her hair. It looks bad. Sorry.

[@Jahnaes.Artistry]

@@lisabrightly What? How does her hair look bad?

[@lisabrightly]

@@Jahnaes.Artistry it looks dry and unkempt. I suppose that's because she's trying to make styles work for her that just cannot work with her hair type. I have yet to see her find a product or routine that's successful. All she does is attempt styles that fail and then talk about it/bitch about it. That is her brand.

[@neecywatson8250]

@Lisa I agree!!!!! It is her brand and it works for her. She’s funny too.😂❤️

[@furrsmith8131]

Wonderful video, black people literally plead to exist. I don’t see why I need to apologise for what I naturally look like.

[@TahtahmesDiary]

I'm glad you're at a point of self love in your journey, but its a lot easier for some than others in this world and I respect that when I see them going through that and recognize I do have privileges that make it easier (as do you.)

[@Asia.Persuasia]

This.

[@HeleneGLmarie]

💖

[@Thepinkexotical]

This

[@hazeljust7001]

I scrolled so long for someone to acknowledge this, 4c hair on a biracial woman isn’t not perceived the same way to the world as 4c on a darkskin black woman..

[@MSALIYAHJORDAN]

Yesssss I love you for this. I tell people all the time, if you want your hair to grow you have to show it love. One way to show your hair love is speak positive words to your hair. I literally tell my hair everyday. I love you, you are beautiful. I love your fullness and thickness. I love you afro hair. By me doing this my hair us growing like crazy. I love my 4c hair.

[@anika.c1063]

Thanks so much for sharing your views. I think the self deprecating stems from the communities we grew up in that constantly told us our hair is nappy, dry, hard, ugly and everything else negative. I'm from the Caribbean and let me tell you, growing up I absolutely hated my hair, because my community hated my hair. It was so hard to convince myself that I had good hair because good hair was associated with looser and wavy textures. Even my own family would constantly complain how my hair was thick and difficult to comb compared to a relative of mine who had a looser and in their words "nicer" texture. Going natural was definitely more than just my hair but it was a journey of self love. In the early stages I did everything in the books to make my 4c texture define. I would pile on eco styler every day but months later I realized my end were severely dried out and stringy. Once my hair got longer post big chop, twists and twist outs became my thing but I was still obsessed with having a defined twist out that I've purchased so many product that guaranteed great results when really twists outs is more about technique. Today, I mostly just keep my hair in twists, I don't do wash n goes and I feel comfortable going out with my hair in twists or in a puff that's not ultra defined. It's still a tough journey because its been so hard shaking away the connotations of my type 4 hair. Recently a family member told me that my mother did not do it right because I came out with nappy hair and that she did it right because her child came out with a looser texture. It can get difficult accepting your hair when you're constantly around these things but I definitely understand you. We have to love our hair, treat her and stop being so obsessed with wanting it to look like other textures or trying to prove it can define too or that our edges can be "sleeked". Even the way black girl curls style hair, showing that type 4 hair can define and we've been doing it wrong blah blah. Why so much obsession with defining our hair? Sorry this is so long but thank you for sharing

[@simpforme.]

I agree with everything you said. It’s very exhausting to see naturals talk negatively about their hair all the time. I mean it’s their hair but doing that all the time on public platforms contributes to stigmas about black people’s hair. I see this so much on tiktok it’s ridiculous. There could be a simple video of a girl doing cute a hairstyle and the comments would be filled with girls saying “cries in 4c” or “oh my 4c could never”. It’s very disheartening. I think sometimes they do it for attention or they do it just to feel like they’re apart of something. Like they love being able to identify with a struggle

[@indriadrayton1132]

I follow StarPuppy only in that she is a sweetheart and I try to support her. Ya'll are young so I don't get influenced. The same to why I follow you,, as well. I see these videos as they're being vulnerable. And StarPuppy's hair is thriving!! She hits on the Black girls who are nerdy, a larger niche than one would think.

[@ashleyedwards5682]

This is exactly why you're my favorite hair KZbinr ♥️ I'm also so tired of these self deprecating videos, memes and TikToks. It makes it seem like natural hair is so unmanageable and difficult. When in reality, if you take the time to find a routine and stop trying to make your hair something it's not, you'll find out actually how easy it is.

[@Herbeautynetwork]

Yes to this!! 👏🏽👏🏽 I can't watch a lot natural hair videos for these same reasons. Another I have seen is click bait titles and I hate it. There is a KZbinr all she does it click bait with her titles and thumbnails. All this over styling and push products and paid promotions I'm tired of it. So I'm with you! It needs to change.

[@jaliane]

This definitely needs to be talked about more often. Thank you so much for putting your feelings out there! You are 100% valid. I also agree as well. Especially about the part where you said people need to reflect on there actions in the natural hair movement (Should I say natural 4c hair community? I'll make that a thing....). If we think our 4c hair isn't great, other people will also think so as well. I love my hair regardless of what people say, and I'm glad you love yours too!

[@LynnSJefferson]

Not one lie was told here. Well said! 👏🏾

[@babyjki444]

i'm not a 4c gurl but i loc'd my hair last year and i couldn't be happier and it's not because i didn't like my loose hair it's just because i'm lazy lmao. i'm not the girl that's gonna deep conditioning every week, spending all hours of the day doing my hair, nah. all i did with it was wash n go's anyway lol. only thing i miss is getting braids. i'll say that while i never disliked my natural hair, when i first went natural i ran to youtube and watched hella videos with girls who's hair looked nothing like mine, and bought all the products. i suggest if you're gonna go the youtube route, don't entertain and compare your hair to these girls when your hair looks nothing like that. a lot of heartache and confusion will ensue.

[@christy7516]

Yeah this is not realistic for me!. At all !

[@hc7092]

It’s quarter to midnight here in the UK, so I will be watching this in the morning. But I do want to say that I am glad you are filming this. Stay blessed and safe. ❤️

[@hc7092]

I have watched this now and I 10000% agree with everything you have said! This is your channel and you have a right to say what you think. And I am so glad you did. How can we expect others to appreciate type 4 hair if we don’t appreciate it ourselves? Many people say they don’t care about validation from others, but they certainly do. I love my hair but I won’t lie, compliments from others is also refreshing to hear. I remember in a video you posted a while ago, you said “we have the most unique hair type on the planet. No other hair types can replicate what we have.” And it’s so true!!! We can straighten our hair or loosen our curls if we want to. Other people can’t make every strand of their hair coil up like we can. Our hair type deserves soooooo much more respect than all the self depreciating videos we see online. The pity party videos are incredibly repetitive and only go so far. It would be far more effective if those videos spoke about the benefits of type 4 hair. Your hair won’t change unless you relax it, so learn to love and deal with it. Also I’ve noticed you care less about definition and more about embracing your hair in its natural state, which I appreciate. I used to care sooooo much about definition. However you inspired me to care less about it and love my hair in its natural state. Our hair is very similar and I thought your hair looked good on you. So I found the confidence to feel it looked good on me. I always get compliments from strangers on my hair or from friends too. When you learn to love your hair and speak good about your hair, there’s a certain attractive confidence that comes with it. Thank you so much for your channel, Joy-el! For every 1 backlash you get, there are 100 people agreeing and pleased to hear this refreshing message. Learn to love your hair guys. Speak good and kind words to it. It will make a big difference ❤️

[@liz.j6822]

I have no problem with Star puppy or anyone else expressing their frustrations with dealing with their natural hair, as someone with very thick 4b hair I totally get where they're coming from, I think it makes them more relatable because the fact is that it's a challenge for many non-mixed black women to deal with our hair and it's good to know that we're not alone

[@cibu8163]

For everyone calling star puppy annoying. She’s on her own journey to her revelations and has always said so. She’s not self deprecating she sharing her experience. Is it hard to just enjoy peoples progression without bashing them. Both these women are in my viewing have things in my opion that they could be doing for their hair but, I’m not them, I have no control over them. Stop comparing y’all selves to others learn your own hair through these videos. Don’t imitate. For example The only reason I used 4c product is bc I looked into their product and loved the ingredients bc I did My research. Do the same. Stop calling that girl annoying, stupid and etc... she is not beneath y’all.

[@elishebax]

I watched Star Puppy only for entertainment. She's very talented.

[@lizacarelse5675]

I love star puppy and she's a sensitive soul, highly offended by the negative messages in the natural hair community.

[@mrssam266]

Star puppy is so beautiful. I just wish she knew it too

[@bro-ss2eu]

@@mrssam266 she does

[@memefree3101]

Yes what's annoying is that this conversation seems to be giving people openness to speak their dislike of her... that's neither encouraging or progressive. Which is why I'm very surprised and a little taken aback that Joy-el mentioned names. There are videos of KZbinrs who have outright said they hate their hair. Don't remember Starpuppy or Chizi saying that 🤔

[@elshawnajenkins4185]

I applaud you for everything you have spoken!!!! Thank you!!!

[@Keepitmovin72]

And I love Danielle/star puppy.. She's come so far while getting thru stuff with her hair.. Same reasons why I watch you.. Not the constant of negativity is good though and I understand your point. But just understand that everyone handles struggle differently..😘

[@ReigningWomban]

I have always loved and embraced my 4C hair. I started wearing my hair natural before it was a trendy thing called ‘natural hair journey’. Whether my hair is naptural, relaxed or no matter how it’s styled, my hair is beautiful. I completely agree with you about how we speak about our hair. I believe that how we speak about our hair is how we SPEAK TO our hair. I love this video and support this message. 🥰🌺

[@classysubliminals4121]

Something that I never agreed with was those trendy videos were black women used egg, rice water, ect. To grow their hair. And it made all black women look bad, the trend made it seem like we need a magic fruit to grow our hair when in reality all you need to do is TAKE CARE OF IT. It's making little young black girls think that they need fruits and veggies on their scalp overnight or els they won't have healthy long hair 🙄 I was feed up with it.

[@deva190]

Let's not forget the vaginal infection creams, too. Yet they will argue when someone ignorantly says Black women can't grow hair.

[@classysubliminals4121]

@@deva190 sometimes I just be wondering...What do white and Asian women think about our hair care routines or, what do they think about all these perms and shit 🤷🏻‍♀️🙄 but I'm glade Joy had this conversation it was so necessary

[@deva190]

@@classysubliminals4121 They probably think we can't grow hair without crappy products and berries. Us doing this nonsense also made them glad they have a different hair type and don't have to. I heard a white woman slip and say "I'm glad I don't have to do that" when one black woman was complaining about scalp burn and breakage from either a chemical or other product.

[@angryblakgirl4495]

@@classysubliminals4121 BW aren’t the only ones promoting DIY recipes online. You can type in hair growth recipes and the first results are of white content creators. You literally have to add ‘for natural hair’ or ‘Black women’ to get content specific to natural hair. And are you aware that so many of these hair growth trends in the NHC come from East and South Asian women? The rice water that you mentioned literally comes from East Asian women. I just hate how Black women get the most flak and scrutiny for things that everyone does. Hair growth is an obsession across all cultures. It’s not just Black women.

[@classysubliminals4121]

@@angryblakgirl4495 I think u took it out of context. U probably miss understood the point. I bring up something that happened in the NHC.

[@lisabrightly]

KZbin is a business at this point. I don't think there's a lot of authenticity left with the most successful youtubers. Starpuppy has sold out and does what gets her the most views at this point. She has sponsorships too...so she needs to keep those numbers up. She's definitely capitalizing on people's negative hair thoughts about themselves...they're just not advanced enough (yet) to realize what's really going on.

[@kanyaflybug]

Yaaaaaaaaaassss ACCOUNTABILITY! We should totally start a self love campaign initiative or some ish like that! 💡 Oh my gerd! The ideas are flowing!!

[@hidinginthebushes_]

When I found your channel almost a year ago, I automatically wanted to love my hair more. It's like the love you had for your hair was contagious. It rubbed off on me lol. I before that hated my 4c hair, because it was never validated. Then I realized through you, that I don't need it to be celebrated in order for me to love it. It's like your own child, you're going to love your child literally no matter what, even if people give your child dirty looks everywhere you go and constantly reject that child, you're going to love and defend the child regardless. I have never taken such good care of my hair in my life than I have since I began watching your channel. God knows I had no confidence and even had to pray and ask for the courage to wear my hair out, as is with no extremely manipulative wash and go to make my curls pop or anything. I now wear my Afro everywhere, with no shame. I am so grateful for you and your story. The stories about you at work, school, the bullying, the discrimination from both sides, the rejection and everything you faced to get here. Everything you went through wasn't for nothing, it was to help people like me. Plus you put me on to the only shampoo I will ever use again lol! TGIN moisturizing shampoo made me realize that my hair IS manageable, I was just never shown the correct products. As well as the mane choice, I love their conditioners!!! Thank you for authentic reviews as well.

[@SharmaineJoyel]

Hello Blossoms! 💐🌼💐🌼 Thank you everyone for your feedback, thoughts, and opinions! Whether you agreed or disagreed, thank you for contributing to this conversation. As for Starpuppy, I think she has a beautiful and fun personality and is a good representation of Type 4 hair with a different density and her videos bring light to that. The only part of her content that I disagree with is the comparing of her hair type to others and then becoming so upset by it and when a hairstyle doesn't work out for her, and the use of negative stigmas of Type 4 hair for clickbait titles. I also never stated that only promoting positive moments in the hair journey to the point that it leads to toxic positivity is the answer. I stated that showing the ups and downs is a good thing. What is not good is putting down your hair type and creating content centered around that. Starpuppy is not the only one guilty of this but she is one of the more well known faces of these types of videos. I hope this helped clear that up a bit and it's absolutely okay to still disagree with me. I will never tell you how you feel about her content or that how you feel is incorrect; we just have a difference of opinions. ~Thank you again! Keep Bloomin'🌼

[@daisyray8098]

I’m so new to the natural hair journey. So I kinda feel like “Sorry new girl, nobody rang your buzzer.” But I’ll still speak my 2cents. I’m 8 months natural and you have been so helpful to me in learning about my natural hair. When I first saw a video of you - I didn’t know you were African American- your hair (I believe) was pulled back. When you unleashed your hair I was stunned at its beauty and at its Afro texture. You hair seems very similar to my 4 type hair. I loved watching you explain how you went natural (I’m so glad you did - because it’s beautiful). I also appreciate how you treat your hair with love and tenderness. Thank you for your positivity and your videos. I’m glad you keep it positive and it shows that you really enjoy your hair in its natural and beautiful state. I have stopped subscribing to so many natural hair bloggers - specifically for the reasons you spoke about.

[@amateurastronomer9752]

Hey Joy-el, I really enjoyed this video but I honestly think there is room for all kinds of 4c natural hair experiences. I’m all for self love and positivity but I also enjoy a good dose honesty and vulnerability. For instance, I’m experiencing a bit of a natural hair setback atm despite following all the healthy hair rules. I adore my hair but you know what, that IS frustrating. That CAN effect your self esteem and self confidence. In a world, where there was only positive 4c hair videos on YT, I would feel like something was wrong with me/ my hair when in reality it’s very normal to have hair set backs and frustrations. Often times, the videos you speak of make me feel less alone and give me the confidence to continue this journey. I totally get what you’re saying but I also think there’s a thin line btwn positivity and toxic positivity. Negativity isn’t always bad. It’s life. It’s reality. This video is starting a great conversation! Thanks for posting it and keep up the good work! 😊 Edit: I want to add that prior to now, I never had any issues with my 4c hair. I’ve always been a low manipulation natural and never really struggled with breakage or thinning. I wondered why people complained about their 4c hair while mine was doing just fine. It wasn’t until recently that I began to empathize with them. Sure, I was doing things to keep my hair healthy but I was also just lucky enough to have a relatively smooth hair journey. Sometimes, we can’t fully understand why someone behaves a certain way until we encounter similar experiences to them.

[@bandaqueenlove9134]

I 100% agree as well. I've laughed at videos that do show struggles because I can relate and it makes me happy that I'm not the only one. Also, at times, we say that our hair is frustrating but if our hair was a different texture, length, and curl pattern those frustrations wouldn't exist, but I feel like it's important to admit that is how you feel so you can process that feeling better because finding that genuine feeling or sentiment can make that confrontation much easier. Some people will say that they love their hair, but then follow up with some form of juxtaposition like "I love my hair, but I wish I was born with a smoother texture." To me, that is toxic positivity where you believe that you have a positive outlook on your hair which allows you to steer away from truthful conversations like saying you don't entirely, but you do want to learn. It's normal to be frustrated, but it's not okay to dwell in it to a point where it hurts you and others (like parents who grew up with the "good/bad hair mentality and pass it onto their children). Of course, others will disparage their hair terribly. I haven't reached a point where I have unconditional love for my hair, but I am hopeful and I think at times that is what we lack. We lack hope at times for the better but ironically are hopeful for things to be perfect. Not everyone should have the same goal regarding their hair because for some their first goal needs to be understanding their hair and themselves and later on wanting to achieve long hair for example (if it its well intended). If long hair was the first goal for them, they would hate their hair so much because they wouldn't understand why it's not growing fast or why it looks a certain way in comparison to someone else

[@stephi_]

Preach joyel it took me a while to love my hair. The moment I stopped watching “natural hair gurus”, and learned about my hair, I’ve been so much happier and it’s honestly been cheaper because I’m buying a product some random person told me to buy. Thank you for speaking on this and being real it is much appreciated 🙏🏾🙏🏾❤️❤️🥳

[@gloriabass9945]

4c here I absolutely love my napps and wouldn't trade it for anything the challenge is all fun for me jus plain fun and challenging 17 yrs natural 😄 and thanks for a positive video

[@limegreenlover21]

Hey Joy-El! I really appreciate your honesty in this video. I’ve been feeling the same way for the past couple of years. It took me a while to learn to love my 4c hair. Those videos don’t make me feel uplifted about my 4c hair. I loved watching Nap Queen videos. She taught me how to do perm rod sets through her videos. I have enjoyed your channel for years and you also give great tips. Healthy hair is the main goal for me and my whole journey was to learn and love my hair for how it is. I love perm rod sets, but 90% of the time my hair is in stretched styles like yours is in the video. Self pity videos aren’t helpful. I like to see positivity.

[@lindalove7193]

My hair is 3C & 4A in the front sides. I am coming to terms with my entire natural journey. You are sooo right! Thank you for this message and with that, I just bought that badazz pink T-shirt. I am on my way!

[@annalishagoring]

I am so glad you said that part about the manipulation of the hair. At last, someone finally said it. It also shows that if these content creators are doing so much with their hair or talk about how unhappy they are with it, they haven't truly embraced their hair texture and this is not helpful to your viewers who are watching. Thank you for saying this because I am fed up with it too.

[@nassaross3043]

You are absolutely right Joy-el!! And that's why their hair is NOT thriving!! And they literally get JEALOUS of the other youtubers that's hair is thriving!! They'll say she's white wit light eyes and slender nose WHAT does she KNOW about OUR hair struggle!! BUT I say you ARE apart of the BLACK community & apart of the natural hair community!!! TALK YO SHIIIT!!! This YOUR page!!! I myself follow a FEW youtubers which is YOU, HANNAH, MO, KANDID!!! My hair is VERY similar to you ladies and your who I choose to follow!!! You educate & NOT OBSESSED wit baby hair & definition & putting ALL this crazy BS in your hair!!! I saw one put vaginal cream in their hair!!! I said NOPE TIME TO GO & AIN'T BEEN BACK SINCE!!! I LOVE wat you bring to the table!!! Bcuz some of these people is NUTS!!! I like educators & girls wit knowledge about their journey!!! And VERY secure wit themselves!!! You've HURT alot of feelings..BUT it needed to be said!!! It's simple...LOVE wat GOD put on YOUR head!!! And take care of it...& anything you take care of WILL take care of you!!! Right...Very good!!! KEEP SHAKING UP & WAKING THESE FOLKS UP JOYEL!!! You are absolutely DOPE in my opinion!!!💪🏾😍🥰💕

[@lubnan08]

I see women with 4c struggle and I understand how they feel, but it some point you have to love yourself. Our hair wont change so either love it and have good mental health or hate it and have stress. For me I struggle with accepting my body but I have to get over it and just enjoy life. 💖 thanks for this video!!!

[@zenzibell]

I am SO happy to hear this from a 4C sista. I got sick of yelling at my screen "YOUR HAIR IS NOT UGLY!" after hearing yet another natural girl crying about how problematic their hair is. This was not the objective of the original natural hair movement(s) that predated the early 2000's. I also believe way too much emphasis is placed on length, as though long equals healthy, or that short hair (yet again) is horrible. I just couldn't deal with it anymore, so I stopped watching.

[@MsT-n7h]

Ii understand your feelings and appreciate you taking the time to share them. It is very challenging to educate others about especially Black people when systemically there has been a direct dehumanizing of Black people world wide but especially here in America. The Crown Act underscores the your video perfectly.

[@TheMspoodle2]

I agree 100% with you. I seriously hate when 4c women put their hair down. I would like to see more people uplift their hair type because we already deal with negativity from other people.

[@uummm15]

Someone had to say it! 🙌🏿 Thanks for staying positive ♥️

[@nondumisogasser7155]

it is actually supposed to be clumped. the define coils helps it break less...the more i washed and moisturized my 4c hair...the more it clumped into ringlets which helps with clumping and stronger hair...

[@JB-nw1ix]

I agree with the sentiments in the video, but I would say that everyone is on their own journey. It took me a minute to really get comfortable with my hair and appreciate it. But on that journey it’s good to hear perspectives such as this!

[@5683brit]

Thank you so much for this. I get so annoyed seeing videos like that comparing their hair to entirely different texture! Like wtf! Shrinkage is what it is! That’s what our hair does…. Let it be and take care of it. So fucking annoying

[@miniminott48]

Well said, Sharmaine!!!! Loved the message conveyed in this video!!! I have Type 4 hair, 4A, and I love all aspects of it!!! I subscribed to your channel when you posted your big chop video and I have been here ever since. You inspired me to big chop from relaxers one year later. My hair is now armpit length and healthy.

[@shaesun3720]

I do respect the directness/your opinion. There is however, something that’s been bothering me about this new discussion that I’ve been seeing on the internet about how we should be wearing our hair. It kind of feels like the natural hair nazi days. Please note that this doesn’t not cover all of what you talked about, I am including other internet discussions. I think it’s cool that some naturals wear their hair in it’s most raw state but the thing is, not a lot of people do that. Wavy, curly, and kinky hair people can sometimes do “a lot” to get their hair to lay a certain way and frown upon frizz. But ofc type 4 has the most negativity directed towards us where this is concerned so I won’t misconstrue that aspect. The thing is, type 4 naturals always say that our hair is versatile, that all natural hair can curl and it’s ignorant to say that it can’t. So now when people are embracing that, it’s a problem (speaking in general). I hate that people think that when you wear your hair in a wash and go that you’re trying to look like you have type 3 hair. If that were the case then texlaxing and the keratin treatment would be more of a thing. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to rock your natural coils. Not everyone necessary likes having undefined hair, I don’t think it has to be self hate. There’s also people frowning upon people using too much product. Some people’s hair just requires more product that others. Usually coarser textures require more than finer textures. For me personally, when my hair is defined and stretched it lasts longer, there’s a lot less room for tangling and single strand knots, and I’m in my hair less throughout the week. I have been on a hydration journey and my hair has been doing better, but my hair has been getting more defined because of it. I noticed better length retention, better styling, fuller hair, more definition, and a lot less shedding. I know you are saying that people need to do what works best for them but the things you were saying are “doing too much” work well for some people. Lastly, I feel like people get annoyed with honesty but not everyone is going to have positive experiences or emotions. It’s life. If star puppy and chizi have negative experiences it doesn’t make them self haters. It just makes them upfront to me. I never got self hate vibes but maybe they should make their channel more of a journal. At the end of the day, you’re entitled to your opinion and frustration. Much respect to you.

[@pameladavis895]

Hey there Joy-el! I have wanted to comment to this vlog for some time now. I really enjoy your content and look forward to receiving the KZbin notifications for your vlogs! I feel your some of your views regarding some of the negative comments from other KZbinrs in the natural hair community were somewhat harsh, especially when it came to calling out specific KZbinrs by name. However, they are your opinions and you do have a platform to express them. Those of us who have made the choice to go natural realize that it's our personal journey! For me, I've experimented with my hair, watched videos, read books, talked with people and lived through experiences over the years that has helped me in my journey. Yes, I agree that there are some "nay sayers" out there and I'm not defending them, but Joy-el when we see their videos we have to keep in mind that it is a "snapshot" of their continual, evolving and maturation within the journey! There are "aha" moments that many experience and if they choose to modify their behavior because of it, the journey is so much better. The best for me is when you all share your epiphanies so that we, your audience, can experience and grow along with you (as well as ourselves)! I've learned as much from the negative comments (like, I won't be watching their channels again any time soon and hope they mature in the process) as well as the positive comments (like, so glad they've come to this realization or how can I incorporate that into my regimen?). A couple of things I have learned is that we don't know the whole story of a person's our journey because we only see an edited snapshot! We don't see the "editing tape" on the floor or what that person had or is going through to present the edited video. I've also learned that we in the Black natural hair community have journeys that are similarly unique! What works for one naturalista with short, medium and/or long hair, that is curly, kinky, coiled, and/or wavy, having coarse, medium, and/or fine hair strands regardless of its color, while living in a skin tone that mirrors everything between Ghirardelli White to the Intense Dark Chocolate, doesn't always work for another! After all, Ghirardelli does make squares, chips and powders, but it's all chocolate! I've watched your documented "struggles" and how you've overcome them in your journey. I've watched your successes and how you've modified your behavior by incorporating them into your journey. Thank you for sharing your "snapshots" and letting us see how you have and continue to mature in your journey. We are all the better for them! In my opinion, your journey and Star Puppy's, are uniquely similar! When you commented about her, I went back to view her "snapshots" (yes I originally looked at it a didn't subscribe) and found that there is a maturity and quality in her content (not to mention her creativity in the weirdness). I actually subscribed to her. I encourage you to look at her videos again with an open mind. I even think you both should have a live chat! As for the others and "nay sayers", what I like about KZbin is that I can easily unsubscribe as I do subscribe if I don't care to see the "snapshots" any more. However, for those that give quality content, I'm in! All the best!

[@divineblackhaircare]

I have 4c hair and I LOVE my hair. I've had a lot of ups and downs, and it's currently on the mend, but I still LOVE it. I appreciate the hair vibe of your videos. The first step in obtaining healthy hair is accepting your hair. The mind is a powerful thing and the "Law of Attraction" is more potent within one person, than it is on a universal scale. In a nutshell, if you "think" your hair is ugly it will never thrive. Good hair is healthy hair and we ALL have the potential to have healthy hair.

[@_PixalatedCvnttery]

All 4C hair is not created equal. Our hair acceptance and love journeys are not the same. I really only see 4C hair getting praised or even truly acknowledged when it’s super long and thick. That’s without even addressing how colorism and texurism have completely taken over the natural hair community. I can’t say Star Puppy is self deprecating but she is very open and honest about her hair.

[@KudukUngol]

We've talked about texture discrimination; the next conversation needs to be about density discrimination. Star Puppy has been the only one I've seen to address how thicker densities get more love in the natural hair community. She is low density and also has fine strands which is much more relatable for me than most of the youtubers I watch and I appreciate her candor about her struggles. There is no way she hates her hair; she cherishes Fluff Nugget and her hair is thriving. And I think she represents a lot of us who don't see ourselves in the Joy-els of this community, despite how positive Joy-el tries to be.

[@_PixalatedCvnttery]

@@KudukUngol I completely agree . It’s easy to have her mind set when you have the more acceptable and desirable type of 4C hair . I relate more to Star puppy because not only does she look like me but are hair types are very similar. There are times when I truly love my hair and then there are days when I am going through it after a failed twist out . 4c hair is no joke . I just hate that length instead health gets pushed so heavily in the natural hair community.

[@MarthaMessage]

Honestly these issues exist in all hair types though not just type 4. Is short, fine type 1 or 2 or 3 hair celebrated? Nope. If your hair isn't long and thick you haven't got good hair according to youtube anyway 🙄

[@KudukUngol]

@@MarthaMessage You're correct to an extent, but since Joy-el is type 4 and her issues were with other type 4s (Cs specifically), that's what we're discussing. There is a hierarchy in the natural hair community and texture (actually curl pattern) very much matters. So a short/fine/thin type 1, 2, or 3 will always outrank a short/fine/thin type 4.

[@AfrikanHairGod]

@@KudukUngol she's not low density at all. Her hair was broken and damaged which is why it was "thinning" severely at one point. Now that she's manage to improve the condition and state of her hair, she's now calling her hair normal density instead of low. I think if we are going to have this discussion of hair bias and preference, we need to do so with all the facts.

[@rhye3050]

I have to agree wholeheartedly. So much of the natural hair content on KZbin centers around beating our hair into submission to get it to appear to be a different curl type. And when creators can’t achieve that, or can’t achieve hair that flows down their backs, they hop on the “why I hate my natural hair” bandwagon for outrage views. It doesn’t help and yes, there are negative ramifications.

[@BreezysPuffs]

Eye opening as heck this is why you’re my fav natural hair KZbinr ❤️ I’m definitely seeing how I’m not reaching my goals by over styling for views. Wow 👏🏾

[@qe1dayatime]

Gurl...YOU...spoke well...hear hear!!!!....AND, DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR ANYTHING Love our Hair don't need hair therapy ...OUR HAIR R O C K S!!!!!!💕💖

[@CreolePearls_]

I love my hair stretched and blown out better than the shrinkage puffy look lol. I wear my hair mostly under lace front wigs and in sew ins. Wearing weaves and wigs actually made me really appreciate my natural hair more than I ever really have. Love ya videos girlie keep spreading the truth ❣️🙌🏾

[@miraclediggs596]

This. Is. So. P O W E R F U L!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you so much for addressing this. God Bless you for bringing light to this important issue. I have 3C 4A Hair texture so I don't fully understand the struggles of having Type 4C hair but I've always loved how it looked and I wished that more women, including those you mentioned, wouldn't talk badly about their hair. IT IS BEAUTIFUL!!!!!! I just.... I can't..... you spoke this so powerfully. I love every bit of this video. If I could broadcast it around the world I WOULD!!!! More of our sisters need to wake up and learn to love how their hair naturally is. PERIOD.

[@nassaross3043]

I totally agree!!!💪🏾😍🥰

[@adriannalennox5497]

I hear what your saying, but star puppy has come a long way. When you view her past videos to the ones now it's really nice to see. Your almost proud of her for accepting and just finding things that works for her hair. You hardly ever see someone with hair like star puppy trying to understand their hair and trying to see what it can or cannot do. At the end of the day I hear what your saying but you probably could of left their names out of it. These women have come a far way not only with their hair but with helping others embrace and learn how to take care of their 4c hair. Because this is not the only problem within the community if it's not how defined their hair will turn out or every other week if a new hair remedy for hair growth, now it's no oils or butter. I'm not coming against the community because one way or another it has helped some of us, everyone is different and I'm tired of us ladies having all this energy to call out each other. Star puppy n chizi are two wonderful beautiful young women they deserve some credit.

[@MsRouge2000]

I just want to do my hair MY WAY and use what works for me as we all should. I love your hair!

[@TMelody]

I totally agree with everything you've expressed in this video Joy-el. I don't bother laying edges or any of that nonsense. The way I see it, if someone doesn't like seeing my hair in its natural state the way it is designed, then they can look elsewhere. Like it or lump it.

[@wandasantillo1678]

This was an absolutely excellent video. I hope this video goes viral. For some reason women feel that our hair has to look like Caucasian hair in order to look good. I am so sick of the washing go videos. Our hair was that meant for the luck that people are stressing over. Love your hair because God gave us this beautiful mane. I love when you said that you will no longer apologize for how your hair makes other people feel. That’s my new motto.

[@DiamondNet2009]

"We all have unique features for a reason." Thank you!💖👏🏾💯

[@gentledov3]

Um not sure if this will take off, but i wanted to start a thread. What do you like about your type 4 hair? I like the fact that you can basically shapeshift it into anything you want. I've seen so many creative styles on tiktok. Some girls even copy anime characters hairstyles. Type 4 hair is probably the most malleable hair type and it requires the least amount of product. Versatility is probably our biggest strength. Another thing i like about it, is the way it looks when its healthy. Even if youre somoene with finer strands, your hair can still look voluminous and full because its so coily. The last one for now is the afro lol. Its literally the coolest style ever and is extremely underrated. It looks like your hair is floating. Its the way our hair looks in its natural state with minimal effort and i think thats pretty cool. Anyway if you have some additions comment down below 😁

[@mayaparrish8283]

Hey joy-el! I love your videos, thank you for speaking on these topics:). I just wanted to personally thank you for the video you made a few months ago when detangling your “depression hair”. I’m struggling with depression right now and have nobody to look to. I find so much comfort in that video, Thank you for taking the time to record such a sensitive moment. Love you💕💕

[@sixteen.candles.4644]

I spent 2 days curling my 4c hair. I see you and im about to jump in the shower and embrace mt fro :) Gosh. I love your love for your hair.. Well our hair lol 💙 keep doin what tou do :)

[@maramma4780]

Hit the nail on the head and was one of the main reasons i unfollowed everyone on natural hair KZbin, how was i supposed to learn to love my type A hair if everyone i watched hated theirs, no ma'am!

[@PinaColobster]

Interesting video! I feel as if this is just one perspective on this conversation, and I can see how there could be other equally valid points to be made regarding this subject that counter this one. Personally, I feel like its just a matter of content differences. Some videos could be talking about 4C hair in a neutral way, without emphasizing any struggles or frustrations of having 4C hair. Although not as frequent, there could be videos and content praising 4C hair. Then there are videos that really show those struggles that a person with 4C hair may be having. Some channels might incorporate a mix of those different types of content. I honestly don't think there's a right or wrong - it really depends on what viewers choose to click on and engage with, afterall; There's content for everyone at whatever stage of one's hair journey. This conversation reminds me of how people talk about social media only showing the positives, and that social media should be more honest about what's really going on in peoples lives and show the whole picture versus just the successful part. I feel like having a variety of content, including those struggle videos that those channels that you mentioned post, is needed and works into making social media more real. Second point, I feel like the channels that you mentioned are hitting their target audience exactly where they're at. There are so many naturals who have experienced watching a natural hair video here on KZbin on how to style their hair, go out to buy the products, use them in the exact same way that the type 3 (or even type 4!) girl uses it, and their hair turns out completely different. We've all been there! The channels that you mentioned took that experience that is so relatable, especially for type 4 - and 4C specifically, and made videos out of it. It's raw, it's something most naturals can relate to, and it gets them thousands of views! I see the perspective that you're coming from with this video but I think "negative" content is refreshing in a way, especially when it comes to talking about something so many people relate to that you never see being talked about or in this case shown in a video

[@CarmelQTful]

You are so on point with your insight on the issue 🙌🏾. We really need to appreciate and except our hair how it is. I feel like the laying edges trend is another form of texturism to be honest. Right on Joy-el 👑

[@younot6921]

5:04: “im not trying to gaslight, or undermine the difficulties they have gone through” 4:01: *”i’m tired of the self depreciation, i’m tired of the pity party videos, maybe they’re for clout and maybe they’re for views”*

[@SunniDae333]

Thank you.

[@younot6921]

@@SunniDae333 i’ve unsubscribed with this one!! the hypocrisy and absolute lack of awareness was too much for me.

[@isaidwhatisaid3010]

When you have a pretty face that isn’t affected by how the way your hair looks it’s easy to accept your hair in all ways and hairstyles

[@LoXena]

This is why it helps to follow people on other platforms like IG, who do have similar face features but found their way of styling their hair. It's an inspiration.

[@isaidwhatisaid3010]

@@LoXena I literally haven’t been able to find anyone that looks like me. I’m light skin but I’m not the pretty light skin with loose curls and colored eyes that everyone likes.

[@lisabrightly]

@@isaidwhatisaid3010 so then why not be your own kind of beautiful?

[@rhye3050]

Wtf does this have to do with what she said?

[@isaidwhatisaid3010]

@@rhye3050 I’m not arguing with grown ass woman you have work tomorrow

[@bludiamond5258]

I love your positive mindset ! Joy-el your videos are so uplifting to watch...it gives me so much faith in my hair. Thank you so much for sharing your point of view with us. I love the honesty! You are one of the people that inspired me to start growing; and loving my natural hair more now. ❤️