Jokes! with Nick Swardson (BLUE CARD COLLECTION)

[@ididntevenknowhewassick6315]

0:00 Norm’s a big fat guy 0:33 I’m on acid cut my dick off 0:48 Great Gatsby in 3D 1:09 I think my doctor might be retarded… 1:20 Jiro Dreams of Sushi 1:42 Man dribbles soccer ball, dies 2:05 PAIN and GAIN 2:23 More of a factoid 2:40 Dogs run to get high 3:15 Another man cutting his cock off 3:27 Barbara Walters is in the news 3:48 Papa John’s coke dealer 4:13 Sesame Street welcomes Armando 4:30 TIME magazine’s most influential people 4:54 More of a comment really 5:04 Hate speech is wrong 5:27 Last joke

[@abrahamlincoln9758]

1:39 "Unwatchable" 4:10 "I'm a big fat guy"

[@BDFishandGaming]

“Now I’m against hate speech, but read that.”

[@ADF366]

I love how Norm gives the shittiest jokes to Adam and his delivery just makes it even worse 🤣

[@acehilm.]

That's funny but also true.

[@SamuelCAsh-ns3wm]

It is true but I don’t think Adam gets enough credit for being a great straight man and whipping boy.

[@bdroie]

Adam egret played his role perfectly, show wouldn’t have been the same without him

[@maxarvo9918]

@@SamuelCAsh-ns3wm he's particularly good at the 'being whipped' bit. but that's just because of prior experience

[@Tol1as]

@@SamuelCAsh-ns3wm Adam doesn't get enough credit for all the years he spent under the Queensboro bridge.

[@skepticalobserver7484]

Nick Swardsen and Norm go together so well. His mind can jump to absurd and hilarious tangents in a way very similar to Norm, and he’s one of the VERY few people I can think of who, when paired with Norm, makes me laugh as much as Norm does. Brilliant.

[@ididntevenknowhewassick6315]

Great observation. It’s a bummer so many of norm’s guests had a much more sterile headspace, much less yes anding

[@nickkk420]

It's also one of the few times I've seen nick genuinely happy in a pod cast

[@tonygibson5171]

“ I’m against hate speech, but read that.” - Lol, love the Tom Myers bong hit transplant in there. BHT is such a classic bit.

[@johnnykebab3299]

I’m gay

[@VaultRadio]

Clop clop The British are coming dude

[@agayactornamedmichaeldougl6289]

​@@johnnykebab3299you too?

[@BrianTheeFirst]

Classic hit as I would say

[@ToddTysonChicklett]

Never thought I’d see the Norm x Tommy Myers crossover. I’m gay

[@thaatrain10]

Easily the best jokes segment in the series

[@Lamar-t5s]

nick swardson rocks

[@redumbrella6832]

Bong hit transplant is the greatest joke of the 21st century

[@geraldpulido5540]

Its being challenged by shaubs mexican cookie joke

[@beatsbydare]

I don’t think I get it

[@redumbrella6832]

@@beatsbydare You're not innate enough

[@beatsbydare]

@@redumbrella6832 I want to get it

[@billcrotts5456]

@@beatsbydare it's Tom Myers bit

[@madextreme2682]

"Reviewers are calling it everything from shit to fucking shit" That was so simple yet so funny

[@Thed-up2vr]

It's my favourite joke of the whole show

[@mikeh6286]

"Unwatchable!" Thanks Adam! Perfect delivery.

[@jacks1478]

Bong hit transplant was an amazing addition

[@fjames3rd]

One of my absolute favorite blue card reads from the show.

[@stevowilliams8279]

Ah, bong hit transplant, a fellow man of culture I see...

[@mrdankjank]

We’re all gay here bud

[@johnladelfa5764]

He was in a fugue

[@billcrotts5456]

I've tried pot

[@theomen7665]

Respect

[@cont600ml]

@@billcrotts5456 as someone that have tried pot i could aplaud but i dont feel like lifting my arms dude

[@recentlybeheaded]

Nick seems like such a cool guy.

[@BOBINDUN]

Nobody funnier

[@tangibleandroid285]

Um.........so does your mom.

[@billcrotts5456]

@@BOBINDUN what about Kevin Nealon?

[@BOBINDUN]

@@billcrotts5456 nobody funnier

[@zachrat9083]

@@billcrotts5456 nobody funnier

[@RyanCoomer]

at a buffet, i personally sneak corndogs into the buffet so others can enjoy them. I hide 6 corndogs in my jacket pockets. it then, is a joy for me to see other patrons of the establishment eat my corndogs thinking they were part of buffe

[@mkultra2456]

You got any crack?

[@bottomlinebassin2001]

Brilliant!

[@ripdajacker23]

They’re an instant hit. Next time bring more than 6 you jerk!!

[@RyanCoomer]

@@ripdajacker23 sorry and WILL DO!!!!!

[@mkultra2456]

@@RyanCoomer Also bring some crack.

[@aaronwilliams8046]

The "unwatchable" quip always makes me laugh.

[@prestonheit1582]

Lmao nice Tom Myers callout

[@mno7pro323]

Man this was great Nick Swardson is definitely up there with the great Kevin Nealon... except for one thing

[@scoobboot]

Nice work on the bong hit transplant

[@danielm4114]

Nice touching finding the articles referenced in the jokes. Swardson's blue card segment and the Furley banter is some top tier OGNML

[@alm3872]

I love Nick, he's up there with Kevin Nealon.

[@ididntevenknowhewassick6315]

Yes

[@nondescriptusername3665]

Weeelll I don’t know…

[@nickelastic]

Was that last line Nick mentioned about ‘meta World Peace comedy’ a reference to Sam Hyde, Nick Rochefort & Charles Carroll show?

[@CalmDownJack]

I love the edits so much I’m so happy you did that thank you

[@uGotGot1618]

The near infinite loop of normisms he almost gets caught in at :53 is unreal haha "Eh, ee, uh, ee, eh, ee, uh"

[@ACWilderness]

Did you cut out Adam's joke!? Lmao

[@travim4314]

This was my favorite episode.

[@jrrd4069]

Norm and Nick are amazing together...wish they would have done Nevada together.

[@johnmurdoch8534]

Nick swardson is great here

[@Super_Kramer]

i miss norm, man. just read the book running the light and wasnt ready for that third act. love you guys.

[@OGRE_HATES_NERDS]

reading= nerd

[@andreaholcock8992]

Came for Nicky, stayed for Tom Myers shoutout

[@rafaelfernandeslopesdeoliv1700]

"...they're all fine people"

[@Kenyanon]

lmfao bong hit transplant

[@danielwiberg6757]

I love how Norm's blue cards fit what he thinks works with his guests. By these you can see who are Norm's closest friends/guests.

[@rowanmakesmemes7301]

The 4 dead thumbs up had me laughing

[@ReeTM]

Lovely stuff. Thank you!

[@StingWolfpack]

"thats weird right" lol

[@tammymayeaux328]

I liked the dvd commentary! I swear norm brought out the funniest out of everyone

[@madforit2]

easily the best jokes section

[@gabagoolenjoyer]

Steve definitely wrote the great Gatsby one.

[@jeffpierce71]

Love the edits on these.

[@bobbyjollins8091]

run to seven eleven for a moldy old banana

[@fallout3freak360]

Hey buddy she’s just had a surgery

[@lornadryden5650]

Nick does norms jokes the best

[@shnast-tv2]

Nice remix. 👍🔥🔥

[@jesseriekenberg1724]

My two fav KZbin clip genres, cumtown and Norm have collided finally

[@randymarsh4182]

as a deeply closeted gay man, i truly enjoyed this.

[@jcmick8430]

What I'm not gay dont you know what closeted means?!

[@johnmsosa]

the last joke delivery was perfect

[@sakurad49]

like actually yes

[@martyduke3139]

Loved Nick's hate stutter!

[@frankkoshel7181]

That was more a hate Tourette’s than a hate stutter

[@walterlippmann6292]

bong hit transplant

[@Gszada]

the ending is hilarious 🤣🤣🤣

[@nikolacatlak9875]

yes the images do help with the comedy!

[@Complex_Addition]

This one's more like a factoid ! LOOL !

[@andrewfoster5122]

Damn I hadn’t heard that Armando joke

[@briangrelling8476]

The Tom Meyers edit was brilliant

[@BenOgorek]

This must have been when Norm read the 9/11 card, but it’s not here. Really would love to see it in context

[@DR32000]

The acid joke gets funnier each time

[@supdog5923]

Nick and his dad really hit it off, hit it off the park playing catch with his favourite dad in the street

[@thenigglefish2682]

The inclusion of Tom Myers is top tier 🔥

[@turdjenbensonson5521]

4:20 what you looking at ayy(A)🤣🤣🤣

[@realChewky]

0:54 the first sign Norm was dying. Honestly, what the heck Norm? Get it together my man!

[@CarlosMarquez-kx3wm]

It encourages dogs to run again 🐕..................................................................... to 7-11 for a slurpie 🧐😂

[@noahblowingless6435]

The Hispanic Sesame Street character joke punchline shoulda been “and stabbed the letters S and A” Missed opportunity

[@ididntevenknowhewassick6315]

lol nice

[@nickystee8396]

Why aren't these full episodes available to watch ANYWHERE? I'd pay ffs!

[@imma5269]

I love the inclusion of the GOAT Tom Myers

[@realChewky]

4:28 of course they are lol. Norm once said he would not make fun of someone he didn't love, he wasn't being racist.

[@bajaborracho9139]

That's funny I smoked some weed in my truck on the way to the gym and suddenly found myself craving a cola slurpee. 7/11. Yes it was glorious.

[@tylerallen9311]

Was definitely not expecting Tom Myers

[@nopenope2632]

Good stuff just disappointed the last “falling pianos” joke wasn’t added.

[@timewithoutconsequence]

At least there will be no more dry meat.

[@BRANDON-FJB]

Nick is actually HUGE now lmao

[@danwroy]

Norm Illustrated

[@carlshiles1893]

A poppa, uh pappa, uh poppa, uh what do you call it? Pappa Johns?

[@Mark_908]

Amazing edit, better than source

[@cadenbariekman5656]

I fucking love sarcasm it’s my gain and defense

[@Gvozd111]

I'm surprised that some of the jokes are actually based on real news

[@lockebrady8005]

Tom Myers shoutout. 💀😆

[@christiananderson6761]

Tom Myers, a comedian!

[@arcarson1253]

'Meta world peace comedy.'... did swardson reference Sam Hyde at the end?

[@jedward5155]

It says here on this card.

[@stuartpidassle7658]

“You know I agains hate speech but read that”

[@kAzinGaming]

When is he going to Reno?

[@MadKingOfMadaya]

*_3:45_**_ ”Yapping” before it was cool_*

[@rafaelfernandeslopesdeoliv1700]

The only man funnier than kevin nealon.

[@mattp.4329]

I Like that woman who plays Madea.

[@bottomlinebassin2001]

Accomplished Comedian: Sinbad

[@mattp.4329]

@@bottomlinebassin2001 Byron Allen

[@mattp.4329]

@@bottomlinebassin2001 please include his title: Accomplished Comedian

[@billythekid22220]

When did this air?

[@Snoozelightable]

Did Nick Swardson say he likes World Peace?????? MDE NEVER DIES

[@nicholasshackleferd]

These were honestly the best jokes that he gave to swardson. He must have really liked him.

[@austinhellems9724]

Norm doesn't hold a candle to tom meyers !!! The bong hit transplant king !

[@drewa6891]

Nick was great

[@TimBurtonTim]

Can someone explain the Martha Stewart joke?

[@MoDeegroes]

How do i get the full episodes of Norm's shows?

[@swapmeetlus4096]

“To run…..TO 7/11 FOR A SLURPY!!!” Gif damnit I miss norm v.v

[@otisgolightly3680]

I think it would be funny if maybe tom myers told that 7/11 joke but it was Paul Revere riding to seven eleven saying "the British want slurpees dude" idk maybe

[@abcdeeeeedded]

Can I have them to eat?

[@walterlippmann6292]

"I'm against hate speech but read that"

[@jwristen24]

Shit to fucking shit! Brilliant

[@matthewsmclaurin6862]

We miss you norm

[@robhubbell1339]

if you keep in mind that its a true story, pain and gain, is actually a good movie.

[@prullzz]

kings

[@VictorHernandez-eq5ns]

Hey man are you still alive?

[@eeyagone1]

Where's Jet Blue airlines .?

[@johnmike121]

What? Pain and Gain was hilarious haha

[@natedoggrevolution]

Richard Clock