INFJ Emotional Overload | Controlling Your Emotions Like a Pro

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INFJ Life Coach Lesson: Today, we're talking about INFJ emotional overload: how to control your emotions. And when it comes to INFJs there are two camps. The ones who believe that they're completely numbed out, that they're in full control of their emotions - and they don't like it. They want to feel more. And therefore they're attracted to very emotional people. On the other hand, you have the INFJs who say I'm in no control of my emotions whatsoever. My emotions have so much impact on me and this doesn't sit well with me. I always make choices based on emotions. Well, in both scenarios, you will recognize that emotions do govern our life. And in most cases, we're not aware of them. Even if you fall into the camp of the ones who say, I don't feel anything, you'll see how much is subconsciously governed by emotions. And it's a task that we should take on. Once you learn the secret to understanding and controlling your emotions, you will see how much impact you have on changing your life and feeling fully alive.
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[@Wenzes]

In what situations do you let your emotions run the show?

[@agentcovfefe6983]

Every situation (most likely) and I need to work on that. In addition, I need to learn how to not take on others' emotions, because that affects my emotions. I have no interest in writing a book. I am not a fan of fiction. I do however enjoy engaging in on-line banter using my occasional wit. I want to be a healer of some kind. I am on the path to developing my gifts, and I am content with that. I have no self pity about my "boring" life. In fact boredom is something I rarely feel. I am quite content with my own company. Do many people have exciting lives during Covid? Is a fake pandemic a great time to meet new friends? More than half of the people in my town are wearing masks 24/7. I have no interest in meeting snowflakes, and I am not about to put myself out there to weed through the crowd for Conservatives. Liberals are too toxic. I have already lost people in my life due to my political views. Not going there. Slow and steady wins the race and that is how I am conducting my life.

[@Wenzes]

👍😊

[@agentcovfefe6983]

Wenzes - But you are sweet and inspiring 💕

[@heliosteraga6019]

My emotions are most influencing when it comes to others suffering. My responses will be quick to end whatever negative feeling they're exhibiting. The more severe the situation, the more severe my emotions are affected. Almost as if living vicariously, but I don't get to choose if I want to or not.

[@soniaalmeida7781]

Good point: for an infj all emotions are always very strong and because we put a lot of effort in our relationship with people, when we feel disappointed, it takes us to camp number 1 and the door slamming, and people don't understand how cold we are . Perhaps the best thing is to live with more balanced emotions and not need to be accepted so much.

[@Wenzes]

👍😊

[@greeneyedparadox6609]

I feel this.

[@deborahwolff5651]

Agree

[@BloomingMeadowsCo.]

My soul is touched from this

[@BloomingMeadowsCo.]

My soul is touched from this

[@aquariusstar7248]

Woaaa!!! Im shedding these habits little by little....the only party i knew how to throw was a pity party! 😂😂 I certainly hv a habit of projecting my emotions onto others which is how i was often taken advantage of. I became a floor mat. I didnt realize this was an INFJ characteristic. I love the way yr videos alter my perceptions, taking my behaviors from the subjective realm into the objective realm, which gives me clarity and makes me more determined and focused in shedding these debilitating, limiting constructs. Thank you!

[@Wenzes]

👍😊

[@skam5572]

I found that I drop my Fe when I go out & try to match the social masculinity level of the people I'm sorrounded by so I'm not looked at as weak or sensitive. But now I'm going to just use my Fe. I think we need to be more firm with it when we go out, I tend to drop it very quickly, but it's just now I'm finding out that it's what makes me authentic & makes me feel alive. When I'm just thinking rationally, it's just not fulfilling for me, at all. So I just been letting my feelings control me, but at the same time observing my behaviour from an outside perspective, to prevent me from doing any wreck less behaviours. So just wanted to say to INFJs, get in touch with your Fe, to feel more alive.

[@RC-ey4gm]

Omg. You are so healing. I love your videos.

[@Wenzes]

👍😊

[@marycain5668]

I had such a hard day today.. I was overloaded with online testing for a job that I did twice over the past 20 years but now is all online! I couldn't believe how angry I was. I spent the last four days doing these 16 module stupid information that we don't even use for the job! Things that were absolutely unrelated to the job we had to have be tested on! Of course we're doing all this at our homes so there isn't anybody else to even talk to about this sort of thing! By the end of the fourth day I thought I would go and get drunk! I honestly felt so overwhelmed by the frustration of being forced to do this task that was meaningless! Eventually I decided to go for a very long look over this beautiful bridge that I think is lovely triple waterfalls and very tranquil. I just could not Shake That Emotion until I actually took myself out all the actual house, the area and totally changed the environment. Not everybody can do that but I had to do that because putting the music on as loud as I could in the car didn't do it! Doing the shopping therapy didn't do it! I never want to have another day like this!

[@TroyPosey]

I only "let" (and I use that loosely) one person draw deep emotions out of me...They just flow when I see her and think about her. I fight it, but I just can't help it. Believe me, It weirds me out every time, too, because I've never been like that before with anyone, ever. That's how I know that she must be meant to be someone very special, and an important part of my life..... I hope. Other than that, I'm in Camp 1 pretty much 99% of the time, because my life has forced me to be that way, or else I wouldn't still be here today. I try to remain comfortably numb to majority of the world around me, outside of the people I care about, and animals. Trying my best to not give a f*ck is how I cope with my own reality.

[@Wenzes]

It‘s a journey

[@TroyPosey]

That it is...But it hasn’t been a very fun one for me, for the last 10+ years.

[@rcr-zt4of]

Imagine being an INFJ with social anxiety. Can be a double whammy with emotions...

[@edenaprincesa]

🙋🏼‍♀️

[@rcr-zt4of]

Eden Evangeline I am one too

[@crystalhicks-rolon8391]

I have to remind myself you aren't reading my diary, but that we as INFJs are just all very similar. I remind myself often that I create my own happiness and sadness. I get stuck in the emotions and tell myself step away and see what part of this is based on how you feel and not what is fact. That helps.. sometimes. I tend to self Sabatoge. And now that I'm aware of my habit to do this I can push all that down amd choose to make the right decisions for myself. It's not easy because bad habits are hard to break. I recently read "Atomic Habits" and it has helped tremendously!!

[@freddymarcelo9213]

Hoy encontre este canal y estoy procrastinando tratando de entenderme mejor. Seguiré dejando que mis emociones me controlen incluso despues de la media noche, sabiendo que no es una actitud saludable, forzandome a seguir viendo un video mas por el bien de mi salud mental. Claramente me esta controlando mi adicción a KZbin creyendo que es de manera objetiva por lo que en escencia sigue siendo mi actitud autodestructiva de siempre. Gracias y buen video!!.

[@infinitelabyrinth6204]

A part from the super helpful content (I am finding myself nodding and whispering "yes, exactly!" throughout the video, and Im only halfway through), I also just wanna pause and mention that I really like the little summary/ title/ reminder texts throughout the video as it helps me to follow and remember it better

[@leoralphvillamayor]

I can’t wait for your book!

[@princesspat5239]

Hey wenzes, thank you so much for this video. Its really weird to see how much i relate to this, even the birthday part. It was my first year that i celebrated my bday and only one person showed up and the rest just made up excuses and i did feel bad because i know a lot of people but like you said, its about putting effort. I only started doing this recently and im going to university soon so i sort of plan to make new friends and have a fresh start where it'll be easier to maintain friendships because they won't hold grudges over me. And ive been studying for my medical entrance exam but i can't seem to get my emotions sorted and i keep escaping whenever i feel too stressed. It's like a never ending cycle and yesterday i really felt like i could never get out of it. I even start doubting my progress too. But after seeing this video, i have hope and you're right its about creating healthy habbits.

[@tomjiracek9049]

I just needed that. Especially that part about being attached to that strong emotion you have felt before - to the fact that if you don’t feel it again, something must be wrong. I don’t want to ruin a relationship full of understanding just because of this irrationality. Thanks!

[@SD-rm5ty]

Great info, I'm currently dealing with a lot in life and trying to actively change my mindset to positivity and just need to keep reminding myself this.

[@ghanajaa]

Yay, this is the way of an INFJ! 🔥🔥🔥

[@Wenzes]

😉👍

[@lisafoster3494]

Wow!! Love this it makes perfect sense

[@anthonysadvice]

Thank you for this video Wenzes, I will be working to apply the tips that you recommended.

[@elenigalani4885]

Much needed, thank you Wenzes

[@Wenzes]

Glat it‘s helpful 😊

[@Magdalena-vt8kc]

Always new and useful thoughts - thank you Wenzes! ☺🧡

[@Wenzes]

Glad it‘s helpful 😀👍

[@user-ze6rd4tf9l]

Wow!! Wowza wowza!!! Wenzes ! THIS Is the BIG PIECE I couldn't grasp!!!!

[@Quoteslv]

This helped me a lot. I'm an INFJ. thank u so much

[@user-ze6rd4tf9l]

Thank you!!! I can run super lots with this!!!!!!!

[@user-tr6sy5lm8l]

magnificent...simply magnificent...got nothing to say except...PITY is not a strength it's a weakness(the worst u can have)...it's from the 2 Virtues EMPATHY n SYMPATHY...work on those 2 phenomenal Virtues really hard n understand the differences between the 2...because PITY comes from both of those Virtues... Cheers!!! RAL

[@Wenzes]

Exactly 👍😊

[@RedRose-jz3uf]

i played a game called wild rift but i only lose the new season so i didnt like it anymore and i deleted for two days.. i felt more peace but bored and empty so i downloaded again.. and i let down the things what i do for fun reading,diamontpainting.. so i kept losing today i cried about it not for the game but i was overload with emotions and that i cant do anything right.. so i deleted again i hope now for a longer term. its a pattern and rational its a game lose or win doesnt matter and i play more than most people so its nature that i lose but i choose to play the whole day while i wanted do something else .. i feel like drowning with my emotions and how terrible i treat people for a game you know inside its not worth it but when you feel so much you just get error

[@user-ze6rd4tf9l]

My AHA moment

[@dhamon-pi6os]

Control is a bad word. Process, feel, and deal.

[@mr.goodwrench8273]

In what situations do I let my emotions run the show ? Normally, whenever someone at my workplace becomes demanding and / or unreasonable and I have to put them in their place. No violence or anything of the such. Just a good confident laden "butt chewin'" . The only thing that hurts them afterward is their pride.

[@agentcovfefe6983]

@Mr. Goodwrench - Lolz

[@fitnesspainful2811]

🔥

[@Wenzes]

😊👍😊

[@user-ze6rd4tf9l]

🎉

[@oceanbluek]

Hi Wenzes how did you deal with breakups?

[@vivianeprudentiabuelens9142]

Try to stay in ♎️ 1:15 😅