Internalised Racism Revisited: Love Is Blind Season 4 Kwame & Chelsea

[@tashenkas]

I highly recommend Dr Cherie for individual typing, she helped me understand myself so much better and accept myself. It's literally made my life easier and better. Dr Cherie, another great video! If you're thinking if you should make them more often, please do! :) A question: being Fe myself I struggle to understand how Fi works. I thought someone with dominant Fi function would always choose what they feel is right for them, no? Or would that be the case here if he weren't so conditioned to compromise and if she wasn't Te dominant?

[@adarshkaur]

@tashenkas - thank you for sharing, I am interested in a session! How did Dr. Cherie type you, do you do a questionaire beforehand, or does she ask you questions during the session?

[@DrCherieTypes]

Choosing is one thing, actioning it requires Se or speaking about it, Te. Kwame does speak to Chelsea about his feelings but they were dismissed immediately. Compromising is not type dependent. But how you compromise and knowing your functions will give insight if your decisions come from a clear mind or stressed one.

[@DrCherieTypes]

I analyze clients during the session. I ask them open ended questions. It’s known in social experiments that self testing is self biased towards what you want to be than what you really are.

[@DrCherieTypes]

@calmingbabysleep1256 Booking details are provided in this link calendly.com/drcherietypes

[@pnwnewyorker9088]

Girl, don’t be nervous to discuss. You ate with this analysis.

[@jlew1591]

Ate and left no crumbs. She succinctly summed up everything many us have been feeling but couldn't language.

[@artisticsoulashanti]

Lmaoooo

[@tunzlunz]

😂😂😂 y’all are funny

[@chelseawilliams8588]

Saw this comment first and knew I was in for a treat haha!

[@whi1870]

She probably understood more be she’s she’s Asian. A white person probably wouldn’t be able to understand the race dynamic

[@lelele3]

This is deep, too deep 🔥🔥🔥 thanks for making this. I'm especially grateful as a black woman because it helps put to words what we see, but are gaslighted to believe we are just "jealous".

[@DR-cr3zo]

I am a white woman and I wrote a very similar analysis on redid a few weeks ago

[@KerryannePatricia]

Facts 💯

[@nzuri25]

Facts !!

[@lynnshine9413]

PREACH!!!!!

[@JustAGrl007]

‼‼‼‼

[@mrswhite645]

I immediately noticed his framing was "because he's black" not "because they're racists".

[@emmaganta2545]

YES! I've been waiting for this comment.

[@islandbeauty174]

I don't believe he, along with the majority of black men would think like this, because they don't see whites as the enemy(even with hundreds of years of undeniable in your face evidence) but their blackness as the enemy. It is TRULY SAD! The majority of these self-hating black men think like this.

[@TititoDeBologay]

🎯🎯🎯

[@daniterry4922]

Self loathing at it’s finest. He sees his Blackness as the problem and only the acceptance of a white woman can heal him.

[@DeCurtaRican]

…wypeepo. Always in their feelings about the world they’ve created.

[@ladyofspa]

Dayummmmm as a Black woman I approve this message. I hope he gets to see your analysis. ☆☆☆☆☆

[@pnwnewyorker9088]

Was coming to say the same thing.

[@OrlenNSophia]

Chile. You’re spot on.

[@ERROR_SCAMLIKELY]

Kwame doesn't need to watch this, he was saying everything shes saying the whole show, its Y'ALL thats lacking common sense, like seriously what show were Y'ALL watching 🧐🤔😑

[@Heyyallhey1111]

@@ERROR_SCAMLIKELY awww sweetie you don’t have to support a black guy dating a white woman just so you won’t be called angry or bitter. You can just be silent

[@ERROR_SCAMLIKELY]

@psychomammiescaught1109 awwwe the goofy clown tried making sense but it didnt work 🤣😂😭😭🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

[@deelowCali]

OMFGGGGG AS A BLACK MAN LADY YOU WENT TF OFF AND TOLD NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH!!!

[@nadiar.7788]

No need to take God's name in vain.

[@deelowCali]

@@nadiar.7788 You sound bitter cuz I never used that word silly, relax!

[@jaxcoss5790]

​@@nadiar.7788 If the person is not religious then they are not taking the name in vain.

[@Aprillove97]

@@jaxcoss5790 umm lol that’s completely not true. Y’all say anything to make yourself feel better about your degeneracy. God exists whether you are “religious” or not. That’s what you delusional ones seem to forget. You don’t live in reality

[@Aprillove97]

@@deelowCali Awwh they triggered you with the truth. Nothing was bitter about what they said and your response is completely immature and makes no sense. You used it in a comment here that’s what they were referring to. If you don’t say it you wouldn’t say it at all even in a comment on social media.

[@jonhinged]

You're not someone that simply chose a career, you were born to do this. I mean you're REALLY good.

[@DrCherieTypes]

Thank you for your kind words - I am beyond flattered 🥹

[@je.suis.prisci]

As an African woman, SPEAK UP! When it is coming from us, they will down play it. I was speaking about this with an Asian friend of mine.

[@rhondae8222]

Exactly! TBT

[@SoPerfectYasmin]

That’s not true. Stop taking the black American victim trope! Stop it!

[@originalMissV]

You know damn well my african mom went straight like „ah ah he ain’t happyoohhh“😂😂😂

[@Saidwhtisaid]

@@originalMissV 😂😂😂😂😂

[@Rhatid-mon]

The Asian women narrating hates black males it's so obvious.

[@NoirValkyrie]

Kwame is the exact stereotype of BM who are with WW for validation and trying to avoid their Blackness because they feel that Black is less than. You did an excellent job!

[@brianal7143]

They don't want to admit it though. It ruins their fragile sense of self

[@kenasssss]

@Documentary's Documented She's not pointing that out, one of the concerns here is that he settled for someone he didn't really want, he doesn't look happy, he's constricted, he lacks self worth. It's not about black woman, we are not his preference, and that's okay.

[@rickybrown4745]

You are right. ALL BM THAT ONLY DATE WW ARE SELF HATING MENTALLY ILL❗️HE WANTS TO BE WHITE❗️and WW like this knows exactly what she is doing to manipulate to get what she wants because she knows as a WW she will always have the power in this relationship

[@MrRealJamm]

@Documentary's Documented spot on. I so agree with your push back on her left wing crap

[@Aprillove97]

@@MrRealJamm there is nothing left wing about it 💀💀💀 y’all bring politics into things to deflect from the truth.

[@MsShana8806]

As a black woman, his need of acceptance into spaces that don't welcome him disgusted me.

[@brianal7143]

Yeah I'm out of empathy for this type of BM, immigrant or not. They lack basic self esteem and it's pathetic really

[@korionterivers9995]

@@brianal7143 ish is sickening

[@jisi8462]

@@korionterivers9995 Aba & Preach? 🤣😂 I couldn’t help it, I heard it in his fake accent. I’ll take myself to bed now…

[@leigh4326]

Worst of all in Seattle 🚮

[@Longlostpuss]

If his black women were maybe less militant and showed a bit more nurturing and feminine traits, perhaps he wouldn't end up on a show like that looking to be accommodated by a race that supposedly doesn't welcome him. Black women are the worst for trashing their own black men and that's why it's so easy for other races to attract them and why there is a rise in passport Bros. So the irony in your comment here is pretty interesting to say the least.

[@candicem9651]

Why are we feeling bad for Kwame and vilifying Chelsea? Her expectations are completely valid, the show is about marriage!!! She can’t leave Seattle, which is fair. And Kwame using his own trauma to trick Chelsea into believing he loves her and wants to marry her - while flirting openly with another woman - is harmful for them both.

[@ToriDTV]

Amen. He's a grown man.

[@evadburns]

No we are not feeling for Kwame and we are not vilifying Chelsea. We sympathise with Kwame in the sense that he has not healed from his trauma and does not appear to want to. Chelsea can obviously see that he is hesitant about marrying her but proceeds anyways because she desperately wants to settle down without noticing the obvious red flags. The purpose of the show is to find someone to marry, but you do not have to marry if you have not found said person. I do not think the marriage will last because they want each other for the wrong reasons.

[@lavinder11]

Right. It's mind boggling, but that's what usually happens with self assured women. All of a sudden he has no agency. Anyway, I can already tell that when they get divorced, Chelsea is going to be put thru the ringer.

[@tango4785]

​@Eva Chuba giod job Eva. The problem with ppl like Candice is that they can't see past their hate of men to actually analyze the trama both of them demonstrate and utilize against each other.

[@candicem9651]

@@tango4785 LOL! Calling a man out who is disregarding his wife and flirting with another woman is not "hate of men". It is an individual - Micah is just as bad in her role here. I guess I hate women now too. Stop it. My point is, MAN OR WOMAN, trauma does not give you license to do harm to others without accountability.

[@nakiatexas10]

As a BW, I was nervous about your analysis, but you nailed it! Even the fact that he adopts the phonetic pronunciation of his name most non-Africans use (hard E at the end) instead of correcting people is so sad. He just wants to assimilate that badly.

[@ibabechanel]

The collective self hate of black males is mind boggling.

[@nakiatexas10]

@Lé Chic I didn't express or imply hate. He represents so many non-whites and it's very sad.

[@ibabechanel]

@@nakiatexas10 I'm agreeing with you... "Even the fact that he adopts the phonetic pronunciation of his name most non-Africans use (hard E at the end) instead of correcting people is so sad. He just wants to assimilate that badly." This comes from self hate.

[@nakiatexas10]

@Lé Chic Oh ok, gotcha! It was phrased as I was hating, so I was confusion lol

[@evadburns]

@@ibabechanel You cannot blame them. Boys are more eager to belong at a younger age than girls. And even more eager to be accepted and considered valuable by the opposite sex at a younger age. Self hatred starts from kindergarten when they want to play with other children. It becomes even more apparent in MIDDLE school and high school, where cliques are formed. And if you do not have a solid healthy home environment, high school is a breeding ground for self hatred for a lot of black people, especially black males. This is why many drop out.

[@Joohee4]

This was deeply insightful and so helpful to someone who couldn't understand why Kwame triggered me deeply. I knew that it was more than just his lack of authenticity. I am an Asian-American adoptee who also self-rejects a lot and I got a lot of clarity with this video... thank you.

[@solochica81]

Wow. I hope this is the beginning of your healing journey. A lot of kids from my culture get adopted by white families and completely end up losing their identity. The families do nothing to help them stay in touch with their culture and it hurts my heart to see this. I hope your experience was different.

[@Joohee4]

@@solochica81 mine was not different but I actually started healing the identity aspect of adoption trauma during the quarantine when I taught myself how to cook Korean food. It was profound, which might be hard to understand unless you grow up adopted and not represented by the people around you. I also had a lot of traumas during my time in my homeland before being adopted and in adulthood… so that’s all been a part of my healing journey, as well. So, I always put race and identity on the back burner from healing (because of the other stuff I was paying attention to), and that’s why this video was so helpful in peeling back and exposing this layer. I don’t think people understand how much race, identity and belonging are a vital part of our overall well being- unless it’s something you struggle with. Thanks for your kind words and concern 💖

[@oishikaray2767]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@sashav.3189]

Kwame feels like someone who’s created this persona to be the “acceptable black” and he’s so far removed from who he is, he’s lost himself completely. I don’t get any sense of authenticity when he speaks. I even found his interactions with his siblings strange and cold, but he could have been nervous. It’s just his siblings were so warm and he was not, but if Chelsea’s family had been in that room with them, he would have had a bunch of fake laughs and smiles. he would have been more animated. how he spoke to his mom like he’s drafting an email was also bizzare. That man decided he’s going to appeal to whiteness and he’s now an empty shell. he reminds me of my brother who married a white women for the same validation but he’s miserable bc she calls ALL of the shots, she makes more than he does, and is apparently diagnosed bipolar. The other brother made three different white women his baby mamas, smh. Honestly they’re not great partners and they’re not honest with themselves and lack maturity so black women certainly aren’t missing out on anything with men like this 😂

[@Shay416]

🎯🎯🎯

[@jordanparker657]

Yes... .he gives me "empty shell " vibes. It's sad and I hope one day he finds out who he is and LIVES it.

[@TheSuperNats]

“I don’t get any sense of authenticity when he speaks” 100% every time he speaks, I cringe. He sounds like a youth pastor/Ted talker. It’s always a performance, it always feels prepared. It’s funny you mentioned your brother because watching Kwame, I saw my brother in him and it’s something that I noticed he does. I call him “the mayor” because of it. Our parents took us to a white church (terrible idea) as kids and I left but he stayed and became everyone’s black best friend and as a result is that more so than a person. He’s starting to grow out of it but it’s still there.

[@BABYDOLL-sm7dt]

So a black man has to become the stereotypical black man to be seen as black? Okay got you.

[@tagon70]

@Babydoll What is a stereotypical Blackman?

[@lavinder11]

These two have successfully rewritten their "love story" during the reunion. Im not buying it from them, but they're both content with lying to themselves.

[@deneengrant2086]

Nothing seems real about their relationship.

[@suussuzy4522]

Never bought what they were selling. They will get a divorce. He is not happy. She s having a relationship with fantasy self

[@morenosa]

Finally someone said it! I've noticed how people are saying "wow they have really worked together, they are so in love" and in my eyes I just see these 2 acting. I don't what's worse, the fact they are are putting up a front for the world to convince people they are very much in love , or the fact that they are putting up a front so they don't see each other's reality and their true emotions for one another.

[@mystuff8579]

I posted this comment elsewhere but under your observant comment is a perfect place to repost it: Kwame and Chelsea are in clean-up mode and trying to get the people to buy into the image of this perfect interracial love story they can monetize so he's doing damage control so they can clean up their brand but Chelsea is the mastermind of their whole trajectory. That's why you see her sitting back not saying a word. Their relationship is so for clout. They're both faking it but they're going to get that interracial influencer bag anyway because people are currently obsessed with all things interracial. Chelsea had a plan before she got in the pods. I mean she went shopping for the Calvin Klein underwear to bring to LIB with her mother that she was going to shoot those engagement photos in before she even arrived. She's extremely calculating and her mother probably trained her to be that way (Kris K teas). She had it all planned out. Kwame is weak and desperate for white validation so he's easy to lead in any direction. Chelsea has a very domineering and manipulative personality that she hides well. He definitely would have preferred to be with Micah but he's not the type that gets what he wants because he's weak but Chelsea is the type that knows how to get what she wants. She came for a black husband who can give her mixed children so she could come up and monetize the whole situation including the children and nothing was going to stop her from achieving those goals including being the one Kwame settled for. Kwame came for fame and white validation through marriage to a white woman. This isn't about love on either side but people link for all kinds of reasons in the real world. Love a lot of time is not why people get together. I'm sure they'll have a good time selling their relationship though. Kwame now has a constant source of white validation and Chelsea gets to enjoy and monetize her fetish right in our faces while being celebrated for it. Following the Kim K blueprint

[@katec9893]

You're right. And Vanessa shamed and mocked the viewers for pointing out how unhappy and tense he looked throughout their whole relationship.

[@FloeticEnigma]

This made so much sense and clarified what I was feeling watching the show. At first I felt like Kwame was a jerk, but then he grew on me. He and Chelsea still seem like an odd couple that works, but then doesn’t and I wonder how long he’ll stay with her and be unhappy. He ended up with her because she wanted him and he wanted to be wanted by someone like her. It’s weird.

[@atreju305]

"At first I felt like Kwame was a jerk, but then he grew on me." Same!! When he started to talk openly about his feelings, fears, experiences, he felt very authentic to me. And he also expressed these things (his fears and hesitations) very respectfully to her. I started to really like him! ☺️ (It was painful to watch how Chelsea blatantly ignored his expressed feelings because, I think, she didn't want to lose him and was scared to do so if she validated his fears and arguments etc. Not a good move ... I hope this changes, or it will not end well. 🤞🏽)

[@lynnshine9413]

Go with your first thought. He is a JERK(based on his actions during the experiment). He has no more sincere interest in Chelsea than this furniture I'm sitting on does. When she showed him how desperate she was, her family appears to have some 🤑, he thought I can fake my way through this, can't I? My question is, how long can he fake it? How long will it be before he can't stand the sight of her or the sound of her voice ?

[@SS-yq9ku]

THIS.

[@AriElite111]

Personally I don't feel bad for black men like him. You can tell he's one of those black man who feel like he's too good for black women and stereotypes us. He's probably never dated a black woman in his life and this is a pathology that a lot of black men have. I don't feel bad for him in the slightest. If he wasn't so intently focused on dating white women only he wouldn't have a problem with not being able to pick his girlfriend up for prom because her family is racist. These type of men are so low level and filled with an internalized self hatred.

[@TheVeritasForYou]

​@@AriElite111 preeeeeachhhhh. nothing has ever been more factual, articulate, and discerning!!! like bruh

[@loyisog4795]

Another black woman here. You nailed it 🎯

[@PayThePiperr]

As a Black man, you hit everything many Black people felt about him.

[@lightworks3172]

Recently, I discovered your videos and am fascinated, and this topic is one we rarely discuss. I noticed this with Kwame as soon as he brought up changing his name and could tell he clearly has a type - a trophy in his view. It's interesting to compare his coping mechanism with Zach - both feel like outsiders and look for validation in very different ways.

[@DrJamesT]

Excellent point and their coping mechanisms fits their personalities very well. Zach's last function is Fe so he needs someone aligned with his tribe's values. Kwame's last function is Te so needs someone impressive.

[@Sharp.shooter-e1n]

Bingo 💯💯💯

[@jaamgirl]

As a black woman, my opinion is that you're SPOT ON with this assessment. I'm incredibly pleased that you were able to suss this out. You've just earned yourself a new subscriber. I can't wait to watch your other assessments.

[@janiceguillory]

I'm a BW and TOTALLY agree with you 100% I'm did not feel any prejudice from analysis at all. Great job. New subscriber 😊

[@Mixedmacnuts]

Kwame doesn't look happy - his words and actions show this.

[@thecrimsoncure8201]

Most Black men who think and act like Kwame aren't happy. And the sad thing about it is that they take their rage, anger, and self-loathing out on Black women and children.

[@asiaisreal7302]

Your breakdowns are flawless. I really appreciate how they stimulate my mind.

[@iseerightthrucapandbullcra1134]

Brett was the best guy on this show, he seemed to have his head screwed on right. He had no weird insecurities, self hate or inferiority complexes. He and Tiffany were the best couple.

[@jamesmarshall1567]

aka he ended up with a black woman

[@MJ31579]

Brett and Kwame are not the same. Just because they are both black men doesn't mean they had the same experience. They come from completely different world's.

[@iseerightthrucapandbullcra1134]

@@MJ31579 I never said they were the same!

[@iseerightthrucapandbullcra1134]

@@jamesmarshall1567 not what I meant, it doesn’t matter what race Brett ended up with he still is a man who had no complexes or self hate! period.

[@sincerely5906]

Tbh Brett is the first black man I’ve seen on the show that seems well-adjusted and comfortable in his own skin. Even if he picked a non-BW, I feel like it isn’t out of a deficit, but due to his genuinely liking the person.

[@jaeplae]

Before even starting the video, girl you’re 100% on this man. A loooooot of black men are out here acting like this

[@FrostbitexP]

Seeing my fair share of black women acting like this too, id say its black people in general.

[@kelsilulu]

@@FrostbitexPno, it’s mostly the men. BW tend to be more proud of their race

[@Lalaland099]

​@@kelsilulu you're right. That's why black women tend to only want to be with black men

[@Lalaland099]

​@@StunningSilken you're very angry. You need to ask yourself why.

[@goldenboybrandon2379]

What are your data about that?

[@queenshay]

As a fellow Ghanian I understand our parents are tough.. So much ridicule growing up you question everything.

[@DaintyAbby]

As a Ghanaian I understand this. 🇬🇭

[@jaylenefarrell7175]

Ww here...is that bullying?

[@queenshay]

@@jaylenefarrell7175 Kinda

[@jaylenefarrell7175]

That must suck I'm sorry U go thru that.Think its worse when it's from your own blood

[@queenshay]

@@jaylenefarrell7175 We see it as normal, unless you get years of therapy. Only then, can you say yeah one day at a time.

[@rhondaanthony1412]

I appreciate this so much! After reading so much Kwame hate on social media, I would ask myself why people didn’t listen to him. He always told us who he was! An intelligent immigrant with deep struggles to make his mother happy by being traditional against his deep need to live his own life freely. One key thing he said early on was he didn’t date or have a girlfriend until he was in college! This statement told me so much about him. Kwame was absolutely torn to pieces inside. Everything you said was true! Micah’s toying with his emotions & final rejection +cruel teasing affected him deeply. It’s all stemmed from past rejection and humiliation which made him look foolish on camera. I recognized the deeper issues that were driving this man! I believe that he and Chelsea are happily married today though. I’m really happy to see it!

[@solochica81]

Great POV. He was honest about his struggles and it was still cringe to watch. He has a lot to work through around his self worth and at the end of the day Chelsea is a much better choice than Micah. Micah would have destroyed him and break his soul daily if they ended up together. I hope that man heals cause his issues are deep. Kwame wears a mask to move through this white-centered world he moves in. I hope being around Brett and Marshall will help him to learn how to ground and love himself as a black man.

[@mystuff8579]

I agree with everything you said except that he's currently happily married. He is still in his same old pattern of compromising. He is doing all of this not for himself but to avoid conflict with others.

[@rhondaanthony1412]

@@mystuff8579 I can definitely respect your point on this.

[@marigoldbeam5475]

I can't see why there is hate directed at Kwame. I haven't seen it, but I take your word you have seen it. What is there to hate?

[@genmorg7088]

One can live freely, by loving yourself first. This guy value white skin more than how he values himself

[@mystuff8579]

I just want to commend you on your bravery on addressing this topic and your sensitivity, carefulness and brilliance. You absolutely NAILED Kwame in every aspect!!! You also absolutely hit the nail on the head when it comes to Chelsea. I posted the following comment under another video, it doesn't speak to all the dynamics of their situation which you so brilliantly addressed and this isn't the complete comment but this is a little of what I see in Chelsea. It is admittedly blunt and is a very simplistic explanation of Kwame's behavior: Chelsea had a plan before she got in the pods. I mean she went shopping for the Calvin Klein underwear to bring to LIB with her mother that she was going to shoot those engagement photos in before she even arrived. She's extremely calculating and her mother probably trained her to be that way (Kris K teas). She had it all planned out. Kwame is weak (worn down by white supremacy, racism and an overbearing family) and desperate for white validation so he's easy to lead in any direction. Chelsea has a very domineering and manipulative personality that she hides well. He definitely would have preferred to be with Micah but he's not the type that gets what he wants because he's weak but Chelsea is the type that knows how to get what she wants. She came for a black husband who can give her mixed children so she could come up and monetize the whole situation including the children and nothing was going to stop her from achieving those goals including being the one Kwame settled for. Kwame came for fame and white validation through marriage to a white woman. This isn't about love on either side but people link for all kinds of reasons in the real world. Love a lot of time is not why people get together. I'm sure they'll have a good time selling their relationship though. Kwame now has a constant source of white validation and Chelsea gets to enjoy and monetize her fetish right in our faces while being celebrated for it. Following the Kim K blueprint

[@lynnshine9413]

THIS IS WHAT "HITTING THE NAIL ON THE HEAD LOOKS LIKE!" YOU SUMMED UP THIS 'FAKE' UNION PERFECTLY. IF SHE HASNT GOTTEN PREGNANT YET, IM SURE SHE'S WORKING ON IT! PREDICTION: SHE WILL BE SINGLE AGAIN, BUT WITH CHILD.

[@jaamgirl]

My goodness, how astute! I feel like waving a church fan.

[@LaLagunz187]

This 🎯

[@jklmnoqr]

@My Stuff: Brilliant analysis!

[@jklmnoqr]

​@@jaamgirl 😂😂😂 Amen!!!

[@mystuff8579]

I also want to say that Kwame's issues were absolutely compounded because of the intra-racism that is rife in the Black community especially in those that experienced a history of chattel slavery and everything that followed. He very well could have experienced rejection and ostracization from Black people in the West due to colorism and featurism. Internalized racism causes some to seek white validation and others to project their self hate onto others and I'm pretty sure Kwame experienced those terrible projections at some point. I wish him peace and healing. He seems like such a sweet and genuinely good person

[@sashav.3189]

I highly doubt his experiences with black people is the cause of this. He mentioned he couldn’t pick up his white girlfriend to prom bc he was black, that experience is due to racism, nothing to do with black people. he also never spoke of anything that happened with other black people. We heard him want to refer to himself as Alex, to once again appeal to whiteness. Knowing that by doing that, he could be risking meeting a racist, and still wanted to do that. Kwame has black siblings. There are a lot of nigerian immigrants in the USA and featurism and colorism is more so prominent in the aa community and not the African immigrant community. the motivation when he speaks doesn’t seem like it stems from hurt from ppl who look like him, it’s wanting desperately to appeal to those who don’t. So I wouldn’t project this into black people when nothings been said to support that.

[@islandbeauty174]

​@@sashav.3189 Very well said! In other words, he's just another self-hating black man. The majority of them are like this in the diaspora. It is a pity they can't use this desperate energy and focus to build up their black communities and create resources for themselves, their women and children. Very very sad.

[@RAJOHN-ke7mc]

Black women experience the same so why are we still choosing Black me?

[@rhondae8222]

What are you saying? Colorism has always been around. Black men started colorism and it will continue to exist. TBT

[@rhondae8222]

@@sashav.3189 Exactly! There many Black mammies trying to justify this Black man's colorism. TBT

[@moonpiemoonpie]

What an amazing analysis. As a Black woman; we intimately know of these types, but to everyone else- their mental health seems to fall off their radar. You did very well.💕

[@rhondae8222]

Exactly!

[@regcla6667]

that was on point, I think most of the black community caught that as soon as we saw him lmao

[@Shay416]

Legit. We clocked him 1st scene.

[@dianecrowder4971]

Incredible! So this is why black men marry white women! Hmmm! Thank you!😎

[@samuisun6684]

there are so many black men like him, not hard to spot.

[@Alexmbeing]

​@@samuisun6684 👄👅👅👅👅👅👅👅🍌🍌🍌🍌🎅🎅🎅🎅🎅🎅🎅

[@bee6684]

@@samuisun6684 Right!!!!!! He comes with a sign that says : I hate myself

[@macarmenadoree]

Wow! This actually brought a tear to my eye at one point. Your analysis was compassionate and insightful. It really makes me take a step back and analyze myself.

[@JessieTrom]

This is such an important breakdown, and you brought it very clearly. The fact that subconscious beliefs and how you actually feel can continue to clash like this during adulthood is mindboggling. You feel so powerless but at the same time you're the only one that can choose differently.

[@JumaMusic]

Kwame was particularly triggering to watch for me as a Black man. As you so eloquently pointed out, his resignation to and wild embrace of white supremacy culture was on vivid display. I feel for him, truly. I wanted to scream, “your problem isn’t that you couldn’t pick your prom date up b/c of your race, it’s that you run toward whiteness out of rejection of your blackness.” Truly sad for anyone in such self-conflict.

[@bee6684]

Spot on!!!

[@wlg8744]

I am a black man and I have none of the issues you and allot of black women think of black men. I grew up in a family with my mom and my dad and I love them dealy my mom has sence passed. My mothers passion to help all people of differen races was beatiful. She was a believer of Jesus Christ a missionary and a nurse. The woman I married is the woman who I associated with the most, who reminded me of my mother. She so happends to be of European decendent. We have been happiy married for 22 years and have 3 teenagers. When Paul says, “Do not be unequally yoked,” he means first, that we should not associate with believers who don't actually live for Jesus, and second, that engaging in any sort of intimate relationship or partnership with someone who does not let Jesus be the center of their lives will ultimately lead to our demise (2 Cor 6:14). We must cut ties with whatever or whomever leads us to darkness. Wether that person is African or European.

[@annco9801]

@@wlg8744 it feels such comfort hearing how black men easily and willing want to date outside their race, if black men only knew how it is being a good black woman seeking love, and wanting to have it from men of your race, its hard because many black women want their children to be black, to look like them. But black men always are the first to see outside their race and eagerly. Something about this doesn't seem right, but people are free to do what they want.

[@sdub7045]

The best analysis of this couple I've ever seen. When you replaced Seattle with Chelsea? Whooo 🔥🔥

[@CaptTrylaScott]

That was so good! Especially understanding Chelsea. It makes so much sense. I wanted the rest of the function breakdowns.

[@LS-ou9lj]

Great analysis Dr. As a black woman, I've also thought that part of the drive for ALL men of color to date white women is to be on par with their white male counterparts. Men are naturally competitive which is great and miscegenation is the most expeditious and most visible way to demonstrate that they are "just as good" as white males.

[@goldenboybrandon2379]

Very good point

[@mrcead]

It's simpler than that. The competition is a front, these guys don't want to be the target of the dominant males by being less than

[@trafficcontrol2420]

This is why authenticity, transparency and honesty is so important.

[@prosperitywoman4life]

I definitely feel that Kwame was very uncomfortable with the fact that Chelsea was well read and embraced his family and culture so well. Which is why he wanted Micah. However I think he also sees the fact that Chelsea never looked at other possibilities and sort of ‘latched on’ so quickly. I think for her, she felt pressure to ‘go ahead and get married’, even though her family wasn’t rushing her. It’s as if, this was the ‘one last thing’ she needed to make her life ‘perfect’. And that’s what made Kwame hesitant, along with shifting his life.

[@productioninquiry8937]

Micah is more traditionally attractive than Chelsea by white beauty standards. I know Kwame didn't know that to start, but he found out. Her personality was also more subtle and less dominant than Chelsea's. Chelsea was desperate and aggressive.

[@moremiaj4786]

tbh, I felt as if she noticed he was the easiest to prey on, because he craved validation and desperately wanted it from white people. She latched on because her predatory instincts..... which we all have to some extent was sharp. I dont think the other men would have married her tbh. She love bombs and not many people except insecure people are comfortable with that.

[@ItsGoingDao]

Truth is universally understood and accepted, and you spoke nothing but it 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@morenosa]

If the genders were switched in this relationship, and everything else would remain the same ( cultural background, jobs, family, ), a white man saying and doing everything Chelsea is saying and doing , but in this case to a black woman, this would be so concerning to me, I would tell the woman to run away asap (I still thing Kwame has to run away), but I guess for some people is not as bad as it looks. Chelsea is having a relationship with her own fantasy of marriage and what love looks like for her, and Kwame has no choice to jump in to this fantasy of hers because every time he tries to bring her back to reality with real questions and concerns, her fantasy is threatened, and she kinda gaslights him in a very "loving way", so he has no choice but continue in the delusion bus with her and her fantasies. But this is just my personal opinion.

[@_heyimbritt]

My same thoughts 💭

[@evadburns]

Well put. Kwame will run when he wakes up suddenly and realises he cannot feel anymore. He will become so numb to feeling. In this moment, he will walk away from the relationship. Poor Kwame. I felt for him. He needed healing first before embarking on such a show.

[@marigoldbeam5475]

This is interesting... I don't see it that way at all.

[@bunnywavyxx9524]

If he wasn't so self hating, he could pull the steering back himself. I'm sure if this wasn't a white woman who's giving him validation, acceptance etc. of the part of himself he despises the most he would be less forthcoming. He submits because that is what he wants above all.

[@TomikaKelly]

I totally see Kwame going out for a pack of cigarettes or a carton of milk in the future.

[@elemeno82002]

this was a really insightful video. i love how respectful you tried to be throughout the video knowing how sensitive the topic was. it felt educational rather than mean spirited.

[@minicarbaum]

Wow. I knew instinctively this relationship was off but your explanation just connected the dots

[@danifranc7011]

This was excellent, Dr. You nailed it ! As a black woman , I cosign everything you analyzed!

[@claudiakirkley3687]

You are brutally correct, glad someone has the understanding and strength to tell the truth

[@FishareFriendsNotFood972]

This is the only analysis I've seen on KZbin that made sense out of this couple for me. You hit the nail on the head. Thank you so much!

[@Anemoia100]

He fell in love with his captor: colonialism and white supremacy♥️🙌🏾…I love this because as an African living in Africa, I see this constantly with my people. Mental decolonisation is a long arduous process, but very necessary for us to have pride in and love for ourselves.

[@michellegrantvaughn1561]

Absolutely brilliant! It was such a great point when you brought up Stockholm Syndrome and his being more accustomed to putting his own needs behind others’. Fascinating!

[@missvegan1967]

I'm a black woman, and I totally agree! You broke this down so well...❤

[@angiemac6884]

You handle the situation with the upmost care and with a great analysis on both couples. I still think Kwame came up with all these stories instead of just being honest and state his preference so he wouldn’t be cancelled 😢

[@liquid789]

Kwame’s mum telling him that he should have used he’s head, when that’s (probably) the only thing that drived the dude to Chelsea 🤯

[@ktz5047]

What a gift ❤ Thank you Dr. Cherie!

[@JustAGrl007]

Ok you're the 2nd therapist that analyzed this with the same answers. I didn't have the psychological terms but I noted most of the stuff said. As a black woman myself ....he meets the definition for internalized racism I didn't know what it was but thats it! I knew it from the moment he wanted to introduce himself as "Alex".

[@frozenraspberries1552]

Just to clairfy, his full name is Alex Kwame Owusu Ansah Appiah. "Kwame" is a day name that Ghanaian parents choose to show he's born on a Saturday. But that segment still says something about how he recognizes that whichever name he chooses to go by will turn into an identity game whether he likes it or not. Either name still makes him have to struggle with how he's racially and ethnically to be perceived and be expected to perform.

[@Grace-jb7me]

whats the other therapist analysis?

[@fosuaaaaa]

Your pronouncing of the name Kwame is quite superb. (My brothers name too) It’s nice to see that you took time to learn the phonetics right ❤️

[@twainalex996]

Thank you ❤ very much Dr Cherie I found it helpful. I saw a lot of myself in your analysis of Kwame. Therapy now a requisite.

[@OffbeatsMusic]

❤❤❤

[@twainalex996]

@@OffbeatsMusic ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ even more love to you

[@amalali504]

You hit the nail on the head & thank you for being brave enough to just call it for what it is in today's climate of over sensitivity to the truth.

[@DrCherieTypes]

“The truth will set you free. But first it’ll piss you off.” - Ted Lasso’s therapist

[@barbarabuttler7647]

Suppressing Kwame's feelings explains why we, as the audience, feel so uncomfortable watching his nervous laughter in response to her logic. I'm a female ENTP, so I understand how uncomfortable some people are with extroverted thinking, not to mention that intuitive cherry on top.

[@androgide]

I really appreciate your analysis, you always lead these conversations with grace. Thank you very much

[@amberredd22]

My jaw dropped at your analysis. This is soooo needed.

[@freedomm]

I hope Kwame watches this.

[@ibabechanel]

Why ?

[@so_westhern]

I love how you break down the analysis with specifics i.e: Te, Fi etc. with the explanations. It really sets your channel apart. Keep up the good work!

[@TheGracefulGlowup]

You put words to what I've been feeling, but no one else sees! SO goooddd!

[@celestejones-vd8vq]

You’re one of my fav channels! I love your analysis Dr.Cherie

[@Seraphina.Is.]

You’re doing good babe❤❤ speak on the internalized racism.. it’s a huge thing that SHOULD be addressed. As a dark skinned actress, I sometimes fall in the “internalized racism” category although I do date people in my race, sometimes I’m comparing my features compared to other black women and seeing that kinda thing play out on tv helps me check myself

[@jtorie1]

Lovely analysis! I'd also love to add that it's so obvious that Kwame in a sense rejects his culture as it seems his love interests are not Black. His explaining that he couldn't pick up his prom date bc he's Black instantly gave him away.

[@brianal7143]

He said it like he was disappointed that he was black, rather than being outraged because it even mattered. If I was his mom I wouldn't have directed him to find another date. It's like he accepted it, pathetic

[@productioninquiry8937]

This analysis is ICONIC. It's all I needed. Kwame is taking on the role of a wife, usually it's women who compromise themselves in this way.

[@Shay416]

...our community knows exactly what we are watching. He's looking to escape his blackness well embracing the parts that are palatable to his ideal (white) audience.

[@productioninquiry8937]

@@Shay416 True, but the fact that he was so obviously uncomfortable while doing it. It was all done so begrudgingly. 😬

[@crissoa]

I wouldn’t even call it compromising for him. Sure, he would like to stay where he is at, but he at least gets a white woman out of the deal. He wouldn’t have done this for a black woman.

[@TomikaKelly]

Which is sad because a wife/women shouldn't be required to sacrifice themselves.

[@productioninquiry8937]

@@TomikaKelly I think Kwame makes big money. But in general, both should make sacrifices.

[@paulerick6001]

This was pure brilliance. If I had you 25-30 years ago I would have navigated my life and marriage better. I shared this with my sons and daughter who are in that age. In fact my eldest could very well be in the same situation now as Kwame was. Hope he learns from this! We immigrants have to be strict because we experience so much rejection and discrimination in society that we have to find avenues to excel just to affirm our human dignity and self worth!

[@claudiakirkley3687]

You are spot on in your assessment of Kwame, this relationship won't last, I hope there are no children from this farce

[@rhondae8222]

Most likely there will be children because Kwame is the same old Black man. Black men have relationship with these women for White validation and to have mixed-race children. TBT

[@sumerian213]

Absolutely great analysis!! You're right on this, thanks for your input. He is self-loathing and totally a Stockholm volunteer. It's quite pathetic.

[@animezae]

This is my first video of yours and I am floored lol! What a perfect way to explore this important topic- from your powerful wording to shows of empathy and how you managed to make an info-packed video so concise. As a Black woman, I felt many of these sentiments about Kwame so intensely that I eventually checked out of the season... glad to know I wasn't projecting. This was the LIB content I didn't know I needed.

[@mrs.w8193]

He seems like he has some self hate. So he’s willing to settle with Chelsea because he wants anything proximal to whiteness. So if one white womanhood rejects him, he’ll cling to the white woman who accepts him. It’s self validation for him. He’s not typical of the African family. We are close and have a great sense of community and family. My hubby is white and I didn’t date many white men before him. I was shocked when he proposed, I’m still very much immersed in my African background and identity.

[@strawberrymatcha2307]

Why were you shocked when he (a white man) proposed? Would it have been as surprising if he were black?🤔. Let's go easy on Kwame

[@crissoa]

He’s typical of an African who moves to the US especially at a young age. They don’t have their identity yet and then they come to the US and it dawns on them that they’re black, and black is really not a good thing.

[@Gryn651]

Why were you shocked when he proposed??

[@wartanabadanooh7157]

Maybe she meant , she was shocked when kwame proposed?

[@mrs.w8193]

@@strawberrymatcha2307 i love how you immediately assumed I was shocked when my husband proposed because he was white 🤦🏾‍♀️ What are the reasons why people are shocked and surprised when people propose? What does that have to do it’s race? Stop the ignorance.

[@BrookLynDaze]

What an excellent video. You have given a very good explanation of what we are all seeing. I feel sorry for Kwame, really.

[@BlueLionsTVNiiNiiFC]

Incredibly spot on, nice that you’re sharing your skillset and insights on KZbin More voices like this are needed. Well done

[@TheSuperNats]

As a black woman, I also agree you hit the nail on the head. I see that Kwame being a black immigrant, I think he wants to live the “right way” aka the “white way”. He crafted himself:his career, his speech, his personality to tailor and be as much as a prize to white women and her family as possible. He wants to be a prime candidate to achieve ideal “American” life and obtain a white wife who is a symbol of success in this country. I don’t know the man so just going off what I saw, and what I see/experience. Excellent analysis!

[@Misstexas08]

I agree! But I’ve seen other non black immigrants from colonized countries do this as well.

[@TheSuperNats]

@@Misstexas08 absolutely. I’m a black child of immigrants and a lot of immigrants come to this country with a blueprint “how do we make it here?” “What are the rules?” And they decide what the rules are and some do whatever they can to achieve that. It’s definitely not exclusive to black immigrants, but we’re not all immune to that assimilation pressure.

[@_heyimbritt]

This was an amazing review. Immediately after seeing him and hearing him speak on the first ep I could almost figure him out and see how his upbringing really shaped his choices on who he dated.

[@emmaganta2545]

It's not his upbringing. A Ghanaian upbringing is a BEAUTIFUL thing. He just hates himself.

[@trafficcontrol2420]

"Replace Seattle with Chelsea." Ooowee. That was deep.

[@myheart3972]

Literally was like 😐

[@Aminah74]

Dr. Cherie! You are so spot-on with this analysis. As a woman of color, I approve this message! SUBSCRIBED!

[@jasante2]

As a Ghanaian man watching this, I felt this on another level. The Kwame situation is like my worst nightmare. I cannot imagine he's 1000% happy in his situation.

[@franceparis5714]

I totally agree and I am mind blown with your analysis. As a psychology student I am obsessed with your content.

[@JJ-xx2fw]

This is very very deep and the most interesting analysis I’ve ever seen

[@iseebee1494]

Came across Dr Cherie by accident. I don’t watch love is blind, but now I am captivated by her analyses - subscribed!!!!

[@solochica81]

Girl you got it 💯💯💯 anyone who is BIPOC see this clearly.

[@Skylightatdusk]

... It is so obvious to BIPOC. Still find it hard to understand that WP can't.

[@lilyk527]

BIPOC doesn't include all nonwhite people btw

[@siiiiiuu7]

@@lilyk527 Who does it exclude, by your definition? Curious.

[@lilyk527]

@@siiiiiuu7 it stands for "black indigenous people of color" so not asian or non indigenous hispanic, etc. You can just use POC for that

[@siiiiiuu7]

@@lilyk527 That's not accurate though. You either mistakenly (or purposely) left out the 'and' that is included in every official definition of the term BIPOC. It stands for black, indigenous, *and* people of color. It's a term that differentiates itself from poc by adding black and indigenous as separate entities.

[@aurora917]

Thank you! Watching them was like a tennis match of overt power vs power suppressed.

[@GarnetDust24]

Whew this is going to make some people upset but you’re very right

[@Josie19969]

Your analysis of this couple is incredible! I realized so many things watching your videos. It all makes sense!!

[@purplecowmovement7677]

Wow incredible analysis 👏👏👏 you nailed it. I mean everyone could see that Kwame isn't into her. Chelsea is the dominant one. It makes sense why he accepted the marriage he wasn't thrilled about.

[@motheryuba57]

Watching the show it seemed like Chelsea put her foot down and refused to let Kwame have or process his feelings around Micah. Even with her family it seemed like it was edited to appear that her family didn't let him speak either. In the reunion the couple insisted that they were happy together and the show didn't show how close they were. To me it seemed like Chelsea was controlling and pushing her agenda. Wonder how long he will be willing to be what Chelsea wants him to be. True it is intoxicating to have someone obsessed with you for awhile but not at the expense of being your true self.

[@joycewilliams1755]

Thanks for your comments. Seeing how smothering she is he does not seem happy happy! I agree 100% with your analysis

[@hallofmirrorsnetwork]

Super interesting. Best analysis of LIB I’ve seen yet.

[@LaLagunz187]

Nailed it 🎯 It’s so crazy how all POC actually deal with Colorism and self hate in our communities. Some of These BM are so mentally enslaved and don’t even realize it

[@kidkid985]

BW too y’all love to project

[@naye5178]

Yes they are! Its really sad. Im over it.

[@thecrimsoncure8201]

​@@kidkid985...Stop crying dude. This isn't about a BW. Why can't BM accept any criticism without blaming and projecting on to others? 😒

[@kidkid985]

@@thecrimsoncure8201 y’all black femcels can’t accept the fact y’all aren’t attractive 🤷🏿‍♂️

[@LaLagunz187]

@@thecrimsoncure8201 they are always projecting! Women never claimed to be perfect, that was another idea MEN created about us and then get mad when they realize we are just like them and do the same things. We can’t be what they want us to be. But we know we aren’t perfect or innocent and never claimed to be. We are all human and do the same things. BM just be having the audacity

[@ultraviolet11]

Daaaaaaammmmnnn this analysis is wild!!! Sheeesh girl u on point. U said the things we were all thinking but couldn't form into actual words.

[@KerryannePatricia]

Giiiiiiiiirl Cherie. This is common with many of these couples with this exact racial dynamics.

[@CrystalM1917]

It's bad when a stranger is more accurate in knowing you better than you know yourself.😅😢😮

[@Theoryofjariatou]

Thank you for this analysis! It really puts everything together. And it’s not just about Kwame, there’s so many black men who have these same pathologies

[@kidkid985]

You are hurt

[@percillaholden3327]

I have been patiently waiting for this one!!

[@BlackGirlGamers]

The Black community called it from the very early episodes of the show. This is why it's super important to have therapists that understand how racial experiences can affect relationship dynamics. Thank you Dr Cherie for this really great analysis!

[@leeann4329]

Nailed it!! He does not look happy with all the compromises.

[@Tia.K.C]

Wow you did not mince any words 😂 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@melanierichardson6274]

Wow!! Very enlightening and detailed!! I'm a new subscriber! Thank you for this awesome breakdown!❤️

[@31nattyb]

I cannot Dr.cherie, you’re too funny! This was such a deep analysis