INTJs love ISFJs: Relationship and Friendship Compatibility

This video discusses why INTJs love ISFJs in all aspects of relationships whether it's platonic friendships or romantic relationships.
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[@MicrophoneSmith]

Intj here in love with an isfj female. She loves cooking for me, organizing my stuff, and complimenting me. I love helping her predict outcomes, helping her stress less and helping her brain storm. My abstract tangents can overwhelm her and her forgive everyone nature sometimes annoys me. I always remind her that Jay-Z and Beyoncé can be our Intj/isfj relationship goals. She loves it and I love her. Words of advice tho for Intj pursuing an isfj: choose your words wisely when criticizing an isfj. They don’t take well to our blunt advice. Use nice words 😊

[@justcallmejon22]

Congrats on capturing your own ISFJ! They really are some of the most forgiving people out there and I admire that although it goes against my own ethics so often 😅

[@notavideographer]

Finally the internet is complete. I am an INTJ chronically in love with ISFJs. Just desperately enamored. I feel like a cat petting a bird. Gently and carefully because I am afraid of hurting this beautiful thing so different from me. All the MBTI community seems to ignore this pairing or relationship, as if ENFP are the only option for us.

[@justcallmejon22]

Glad to hear that I'm not the only INTJ that simp for ISFJs 😂

[@notavideographer]

Please consider following up with tips for communicating with ISFJs. Being both IJs there’s a vulnerability issue as neither will want to be first to open up. And I am afraid that it’s the INTJ would be the one to miss subtle cues that the ISFJ is trying to politely communicate and end up accidentally steamrolling them. 😕 plus we are always thinking fast while ISFJs need looooooots of time to marinate.

[@brycenwhitesides6866]

I love that analogy “a cat petting a bird because you have to be so gentle”

[@Love-ci4sv]

I(INTJ) fell madly in love with ISFJ and didn't wait a moment to plan the marriage.Tough communication.Nearly zero common interests.But I ❤ her so much that I adapt.

[@b1jama916]

same case here i kina love this isfj gal i wondered if we were compatible but seems i am not the only one

[@genowefatrabka2046]

My boyfriend is pure ISFJ (as well as his mom) and he literally hack my system by just being good. In the past, all the people who did things for me complained about it or looked like they were forced to do it "because it's appropriate", so I was used to it and thought it was standard. That's why when we moved in together (then still as roommates) I was shocked that he simply cares about such everyday relationships and harmony in the apartment through small gestures like washing the dishes when I had a really bad day, making food or covering with a blanket when I fell asleep on the sofa in the kitchen . AND HE DIDN'T WANT ANYTHING IN RETURN NOR MENTIONED IT. I was like... dude... Why? I couldn't understand this for a while, I had to reorganized few things and observe him to find out that he wasn't false with this. I often have to be selfish for him, because he can completely forget about his needs. I also have to take care of him because he can't take care of himself at all - this is still new to me and I suck at it but we both are quite nice in communication, so it comes easier.

[@justcallmejon22]

Congrats on landing an ISFJ hunk! Having two ISFJ siblings, I've learned that they are similar to INTJs where we're both willing to do things as necessary to ensure our loved ones are happy and don't expect anything in return. What I also learned is that similar to INTJs, we get exhausted at times and that's when getting help from others means the most. I'm happy to hear that you're taking care of him, I will also support the ISFJ x INTJ relationship 🙂

[@Duck-fy6xn]

I hope for you guys the happiness 🙏

[@cinthyaraudales5033]

I am so lucky to have an ISFJ mom and all you said it's so true. Sometimes I still crash at my mom's house tired from working on the future and she will feed me, bring comfortable clothes, tell me to take a nap while she watches my kid , etc. 😂 I will say they tend to stress easily over everyone. I find that to be their weak point.

[@justcallmejon22]

I do the same thing with my ESFJ mom as well! I've also always been aware that her love language is acts of service (Fe dom) so I purposely go to her when I'm down so it helps future our relationship. xSFJ moms are the best (once we learn how to set boundaries and communicate 😅)

[@alizja_Detective24Pup]

Finally someone who recognises this paring. I remember when I got together with my isfj bf and I looked at our type compatibility I got a bit worried since it most people said it won't work out, but I kept on going and I don't regret it at all. I also have an isfj mum and a lot of what you said was true, we see things completely different but we still achieve the same outcome. In conclusion I love isfjs even if we don't things the same way, because they notice things I don't and vise versa

[@justcallmejon22]

I'm happy to hear that you found your ISFJ hunk! The relationship does have a lot more struggles than dating other MBTI types but it's always worth it in the end if both parties are invested. F* all the noise, follow your heart 🙂

[@moneymanagement24]

I’ve noticed a lot of ISFJ are very intelligent too but it can sneak up on you. Also female ISFJ get flirted with by males I’ve noticed lol. Mostly all female FJ types do it attracts them😂

[@justcallmejon22]

Dude, I get it. It's embarassing to say that I also simp for Si-doms 😅

[@AkiraSasaki-cv1vd]

ISFJ here =v= my ideal type is INTJ, hopefully I'll meet them one day. It's good to know that there are people who also think that this couple can work, since most of the type chart always tell us that they're incompatible. I do think that with effort, any couple can work out though.

[@justcallmejon22]

I already mentioned in this video that I'm a simp for ISFJs so I'm all for your journey to find one! Communication is for sure key in this relationship, moreso than others but Ni/Te & Si/Fe combining means all the weaknesses of both types are covered! There's an INTJ content creator that mentioned she dated an ISFJ for a while, check her out when you get the chance: www.youtube.com/@EnglishWinterRunne

[@keziahkeren7163]

An ISFJ here! I know one INTJ so far. At first, we didn't talk much. I was the one who approached him first, and we had some conversation about MBTI. Back then, I didn't know about cognitive functions, and he's the one who introduced them to me. He's younger than my age. I really find you guys very intelligent. Thank you for sharing your gift of knowledge with us! I also find you guys intriguing, maybe because we're completely opposite types. Anyways, this INTJ I know has once said that he's comfortable talking with me, and I'm glad to know that. We talked for hours the second time we met and I got to know a bit more about him. You guys are kindhearted, endearing people. Thank you for sharing your experiences and understanding of ISFJs. They're very helpful. Thank you! Take care, always!

[@justcallmejon22]

Congrats on finding your own INTJ! I will admit that ISFJs are difficult to be around at times but you guys really do help mature the INTJ in your way of thinking. I hope you two keep in touch and that you understand that if he continues to communicate with you, then you've won his respect 🙂

[@Duck-fy6xn]

My isfj friend think that intjs has a cool character, although i am an enfp but i hate talking about enfpxintj 24 h , love to see new another couple grow so thank you

[@justcallmejon22]

Of course! Never let MBTI determine who to love 🙂

[@PaleGhost69]

My isfj is going to love this video. 8:34 Is her favorite thing to poke at me. She is always quoting "Through the eyes of the isfj" by Dear Kristen every time too. Also she's not so much living in the present... She's still trying to live in the 90s.😂

[@justcallmejon22]

That list in the Dear Kristen video can go on for days! And agreed, my ISFJ friends go wild when a bar plays 90's/2000 hip-hop 😂

[@Unabatedhalo775]

It's a lot of fun to listen to these videos while doing mundane tasks, thanks for taking the time to make them!

[@justcallmejon22]

I personally feel like my voice is annoying 😂

[@moneymanagement24]

My BF is an ISFJ and I’m an INTJ female. We have complete opposite gender roles. Also his Fe and Si are perfect, because those are functions INTJ lack lol

[@justcallmejon22]

Congrats on getting an ISFJ hunk! Trust me when I say that I notice once a week that I don't have an Si user around anymore after dating an ISFJ and an ISTJ 😂

[@RobynLeigh111]

The clothes comment was spot on. I never buy clothes. when I was single and lived with my mother (ISFJ) she would always buys me clothes....because I am the way I am 😂

[@justcallmejon22]

ISFJs usually get us pretty flattering clothes too 😂

[@gksurabhi]

Beautifully articulated and well explained ❤

[@justcallmejon22]

Thank you 🙏

[@HahaOK88]

That "INTJ think ISFJ is so attractive " got me smiles a lot. 😊 i'll marry an INTJ soon!

[@justcallmejon22]

Just make sure to tone down your Ti, it's harsh sometimes 😅

[@SohamHamsah]

I started seeing a therapist and I'm pretty sure he is ISFJ (even though he mistyped himself as INTJ). I've tried therapy multiple times before and never found it very helpful until now. Even before this video came out, I was thinking that the reason why I click so well with this therapist is because we have different functions in the opposite order. I'm glad to see my theory validated. I think being opposite gender is also a key factor. I'm used to men being intellectually intimidated by me, so it's refreshing when someone celebrates who I am. Also, I find that many men are not able to connect on an emotional level, so that's been really helpful too. You seem to have a lot of friends and close connections as an INTJ. I have such a hard time finding like minded people. I don't know if it is because being an INTJ female is against gender stereotypes, so I find it even harder to fit in than an INTJ male, or because I have Complex PTSD so it takes me much longer to trust anyone. It also doesn't help that I have avoidant attachment and I'm demisexual, so it takes forever for me to open up.

[@justcallmejon22]

I'm always happy to hear when a person finds a therapist that you enjoy! In regards to my social circle, it's because I realized early to just accept people for who they are and to stop overthinking. I stopped wondering why someone is my friend and I learned not to take things personally when their beliefs go against my Fi values. They don't have to understand me, most people never will. I just have to feel safe around them and enjoy their company. ✊

[@SohamHamsah]

Thank you, this is really helpful advice. I am definitely overthinking it. I tried to see if there was any kind of pattern and there didn't seem to be other than the 3 types that I don't get along with are ESTP, ESTJ, and ESFJ. It's really hard for me not to get into arguments when Fi is involved, especially on topics of racism and sexism. I do feel misunderstood, so after a while I stop trying to communicate.

[@fancynancy2888]

Interesting...I am an INTJ woman. My ISFJ sister clash but we get along enough to get along. I can handle her sensing function but I just come to expect it. But her feeling and my thinking functions clash that I just hold my tongue, let her ramble first about what she is thinking or feeling (which is usually as I predicted based on her pattern), then give her a short concise response. When you discussed fixing a problem and making a person happy, it reminded me of her wedding. She left behind an accessory in her hotel room she wanted to wear but we were in the ballroom. She was getting emotional and her wedding planner was not helpful. They were going on for at least 5 minutes about the situation about how there wasn't time to get it and what they should do instead. I knew the route to the hotel room, estimated the distance and time to and fro. I interrupted the conversation and told my sister, I can get the accessory but I need 5-7 minutes if she agreed. She agreed so I picked up my dress and sprinted there and back. My sister was calm and happy after I fixed her problem. Surprisingly, her husband I found out later is an INTJ (I don't know how he handles her emotions) so it makes sense my brother-in-law are thick as thieves geeking out over our interests.

[@justcallmejon22]

Good stuff saving the day! I find it interesting that your sister married an INTJ since I've noticed myself gravitating towards ISFJs because of comfort growing around them. I know it won't work out in the longrun but it's nice to day dream sometimes 😅

[@Denisa-vc1mj]

I am soo happy Jon you have decided in the end to make videos also about sensor types. :) Thank you for that. And would you also maybe like to make a video about the INTJs? About your interactions and relationships with other INTJs. That would be enriching insight for sure :)

[@justcallmejon22]

Yeah, I decided that should show Sensors some love too! I'm saving INTJ x INTJ video last because I think I have the most to say about that dynamic 😂

[@Denisa-vc1mj]

Ah I see. I’m already looking forward to it :D

[@ofc_its_sidd]

The only girl who made me to feel something ever is ISFJ watching this to know basics about them which can help me plan how to approach her in the most perfect way that we'll end up together.

[@justcallmejon22]

Good luck!

[@Elodie_N_INTJ_Analyzes]

11:59 This is perfect !

[@justcallmejon22]

Thank you 🙏

[@divinityomine6935]

Intj female with an Isfj male 😍 I love this man so much. Only guy I've ever been fully monogamous for (yes, the past partners knew I wasn't monogamous, polygamy without communication is just cheating) and I don't think I'd ever wanna change it

[@justcallmejon22]

Congrats on finding a partner my INTJ sister 🙂

[@kindauncool]

You explained 4:26 so well

[@MichaelLover9]

OMG right?

[@justcallmejon22]

😁

[@s4nder86]

They're nice people but communication is super inefficient and tiresome.

[@jhp040980]

I’m an ISFJ female dating an INTJ and it is a struggle to find commonalities with communication. We have many similar hobbies and interests but it’s like my way of communicating misses the mark. We care for each other very much and work on our communication. I have to say that I greatly admire INTJs Te function and work on strengthening it within myself. I would appreciate any recommendations on learning more about this subject not only for my relationship but also in general. Thanks for the great content!

[@Silco616]

Lovely S&M relationship.

[@justcallmejon22]

😅

[@arson1tez]

INTJ here with a sister from another mother who is ISFJ. I can't specify just how much we synergize so well with each other that the thought of losing each other just fills us both with dread.

[@justcallmejon22]

We're a great pairing when it works, but horrible when it doesn't 😅

[@zycho1523]

Omg just in time. Im potentially seeing an ISFJ

[@justcallmejon22]

Good luck on the relationship!

[@jeffrey-825]

Depending on the perspective and what one focusses on, you would have the ISFJ or the ESFP as complete opposite. 8 functions or the 4 stack. You could even argue the ENTP is on the "other end" of the same order of attributes. You could say every one of the 16 personalities is connected in their own way. In this case, if one could gain practical use and exercise on all the 8 functions... could one become omnipotent in cognitive functions?

[@justcallmejon22]

Agreed that context and perspective matter when talking about opposites in cognitive functions. I feel like most people learn how to exercise all 8 functions at least to a certain extent at one point in their lives. But to master all functions equally, you're basically asking for the Avatar 😂

[@barbzdukane]

Not gonna lie...I've taken advantage of the knowledge that my ISFJ sister would do anything for me, because she's just that soft...😁 - say you're an INTJ villain without saying you're one😂

[@justcallmejon22]

I let the ISFJs do things for me because I know it makes them happy to be helpful 😁

[@joyandrews3804]

An ISFJ only asks to be appreciated. A simple ‘thank you’ makes my day😊

[@cl8045]

Can you talk about the shadow functions?

[@justcallmejon22]

Like go over the concept of shadow functions or INTJ shadow functions?

[@itz_sidd_fr]

I see...

[@justcallmejon22]

I(tz)_see(d)

[@griffingantte4319]

Will u pls help my type myself..can’t tell if I’m an isfj or infp

[@justcallmejon22]

Read about cognitive functions. There's a huge difference between the two and it should become more clear after reading into them.

[@aocbbl]

How do you figure out the function stacks once you determine the mbti of a person without memorization? I know this sounds counterintuitive since the cognitive functions come first. But I think i saw you devise a methodology in one of your videos doing this? Can you point me into the right direction?

[@giovanim9338]

1) a person's dominant function will determine its E-I allignment: a Te-dom will be an ExTJ, while a Ti-dom will be an IxTP (I'll approach later why's this flipped); 2) by the other way around, an extravert will have a dominant extraverted function (Te, Fe, Ne, Se) while an introvert will have an auxiliary extraverted function (dominant Ni, Si, Ti, Fi); 3) P and J signal which is the first extraverted function in a person: INTP will have an auxiliary extraverted perceiving function (Ne, in this case), while an INFJ will have an auxiliary judging function (Fe); for extraverts, ESTP will have dominant Se while ESTJ will have dominant Te. With time you'll see there are predominant characteristics with every preferred function in others and oneself, allowing you to better understand how to approach your contexts. (That's what I could salvage of MBTI elementary)

[@aocbbl]

@@giovanim9338 appreciate this. Will screenshot this and give it another look tomorrow. I was seriously trying to find the pattern of transcribing mbti into function stacks which I know is possible but haven't spent enough time to figure it out.

[@justcallmejon22]

Exactly what Giovani said and here's a clip from Frank James explaining it that might help: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qoLEeZeQorGqrNE

[@aocbbl]

@@justcallmejon22 appreciate the timecode link

[@aocbbl]

@@justcallmejon22 that video and post above helped a lot. I can now figure out the 8 function stacks of each 16 personality types. It's easy once you figure out the pattern. This will be a game changer. Thanks all.

[@aocbbl]

First. Don't you love how i subbed to this channel being a hater and now im the first to view this video?

[@PaleGhost69]

If you're still a hater and are first to the video, you should really find a better use for your time. Try gardening or going for a walk. Try a new hobby.

[@aocbbl]

@@PaleGhost69 I suggest you pick up philosophy book with your sub-par logical reasoning skills

[@aocbbl]

@@PaleGhost69 this message wasn't even directed towards you so why butt in? You have no context of what I mean as 'being a hater' but you're quick to jump to assumptions. Kindly, go fuvk yourself as your new hobby.

[@coconut2697]

If you were a hater, why did you subscribe?

[@justcallmejon22]

We did it boys! He's not a hater anymore 😁