Is There a Secret Formula to Raising Biracial Kids?

[@sheilaafi8535]

My daughter is just 2 months so i really can't say much, but what i can relate with is, she is really light and pple actually think am a nanny too, but it is what it is. Am sure as your daughter grows she will learn to embrace her beauty cuz she is absolutely beautiful.

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+sheila afi Thanks so much. SHe is embracing her beauty. It's been a long journey and it continues. But the key is repetition and reaffirming how beautiful she is both inside and out. I understand the"nanny" struggle. I've gotten that too.

[@Squishy876]

Just have her know that she is two things but will be perceived as just one and have her know that community. It's fine

[@TheKhrissss]

It sounds like maybe your daughter is having some sort of internalized issues with colorism maybe. I mean this in the most non offensive way, but you mentioned that she seems to be more accepting of her 'white side' (for lack of a better term) and that she is more accepting of the European features and wishes she were lighter and had straight hair, being that she IS a little bit darker, she is going to likely PRESENT as black, meaning that that is what people are going to see her as when they first look at her. My suggestion is to show her more beautiful BLACK women and maybe give her more black dolls and expose her to just overall excellence from black women in general just because there seems to be a sort of anti- blackness in the world so to speak. it makes me think of the doll experiment where they showed black children black dolls and white dolls and asked them to choose the ones that they thought were beautiful and smart and they almost always chose the white doll as both.

[@TheKhrissss]

I'd definitely be selective with the media I let her see too because it's understandable that maybe she would want straighter hair or lighter skin because when you even google the word beauty, that's all you see at first. Representation becomes an issue. I am in a biracial marriage now and I am black and my husband is a darker skinned Filipino and they definitely have colorism as well BUT if we have children I know that they are going to PRESENT as black (especially if they have my hair texture and his skin tone) so I am prepared to face similar issues. I hope that over time your little princess begins to love all the things about herself! ❤️

[@WeatherAnchorMama]

+Khristian Simone thanks. Things have gotten a lot better over the last couple of years overall. Our daughter is in a much better place. I think a huge part of it is attributed to the fact that we talk about race. She also attends a school that is much more diverse than we originally thought. She sees other kids who are mixed race and have made friends. I know this will be ongoing as she gets older as well. Our kids' surroundings and exposure to different things will change over time and we understand that. I wish you all the best. Any person of mixed race will have to face this subject matter at some point, your future kids included. Sounds like you're ready for it. All the best to you. 😄

[@WeatherAnchorMama]

Thanks. She has dolls of all races, but most of them look like her. The key is to get dolls that also resemble your kids because you want them to appreciate their beauty. As a kid, all I saw was white girls in magazines and shows. I did have black dolls and white dolls. But it was evident that society's perception of beauty was white/light skin and it affected me. It seems like that to this day. Again, that's why having a dialogue with kids is key. We tell our daughter that she's smart beautiful and talented everyday. We have books that feature all races, with an emphasis on biracial kids. Parents of biracial/multiracial kids should embrace that and not necessarily raise a child one sided. In other words, my daughter is aware of her white American side, but the Jamaican side has a huge influence - considering she spends time with my mom everyday. You have a the right idea and I think you'll be a great mom. 😊

[@TheKhrissss]

+WeatherAnchorMama d'aaaaw! Thank you so much! And I think you guys have the right idea too! I think it's wonderful that you at least TALK about race with your kids. Too many people are somehow under the impression that just by talking about race or racism is somehow keeping it alive. You're exactly right- embrace BOTH sides and talk about both differences but both similarities as well.

[@WeatherAnchorMama]

+Khristian Simone yes. Absolutely. That's so true. I did ask my husband why his family never brought it up. He said his family just never talked about race. Rather than make it the elephant in the room, we just put it out there.

[@rocksta101]

Huh? There are kids with both African-American parents that are as light as both of your kids, some even lighter. Do they go to a school with just light skinned kids. This was a bit weird. but eh

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+Rock Jo Do you have a biracial experience? Are you biracial or have biracial children? If not, that's probably why you don't understand.

[@gunnysgirl]

+Rock Jo This is Stacy-Ann's reality. My parents are African American (Mom has very fair skin) and both their children are light with my sister being lighter than me. But as I've gotten older and gotten heavy into genealogy I have found the caucasian ancestors. Trust me, those kids and parents you mention have caucasian blood but no white parent right there as Stacy-Ann's husband is right there as their Dad and his family is I'm sure firmly in the family dynamic. My sister's daughter was seven and told my sister she was "dirty" when looking at her skin and observing her white classmates in Berkeley CA. And SHE is light skinned. It really does matter about dealing with an all white or all black school and how it affects their children. That's why an integrated school with a combination of many cultures is best. Bottom line, their concerns are valid. Thank you.

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+gunnysgirl Thanks so much. Yes, these are concerns that my husband and I deal with. We did this video with the hopes of helping families like us identify racial identity issues they may face with their kids. I think the key is to be open and honest with your kids about race.

[@tiffanycotter9675]

The kids are still socialized as black.

[@joanbrodie4116]

Oh Lord!!!! Don't mess up your kids. I'm biracial, in my 50's. I turned out fine.

[@SouthSideLadyWright]

I have a biracial son. His father white. My son grew up okay. He made friends easily.

[@gracegiles5462]

How about a school with people of all races and ethnic backgrounds? Do you only want your daughter to be with kids that look like her? I think your daughter is probably some issues now because you weren’t having an ongoing conversation about race and ethnic identity with her. If you were teaching her along the way that mommy’s skin color is beautiful and that people come in different beautiful shades, this won’t be an issue now.

[@sheripresley5438]

No judgement but it sounds like your kids aren’t getting enough empowerment from black role models. And by black I don’t mean “darker than her”. To prepare children best about the issues of colorism parents need to be informed as well. Some people may not even realize that they are actually the ones teaching their kids colorism.

[@mamaof3590]

You have such a beautiful family! My daughter is nine, almost ten, and she went thru a phase where she wanted straight hair, and it kind of broke my heart to hear that. I would just tell her how beautiful her curly hair was and that it was special and made her unique. She loves her hair now and even makes comments about it being special and how it's not like any of her friends, lol. I hope she always embraces her hair exactly how it is! I think it's a problem for all girls to want what they don't have, and a job for us mothers to teach them to embrace and value their own beauty.

[@javierpanadero2060]

As the father of a biracial child (Asian/White) whose mother is dark (FIlipino) I see the issue of darkness from a different angle. My daughter is now 18 but I can say that middle school and high school were rough even though the Bay area has lots of biracial children of various types. You may find that what works now won't work in two weeks but I would say that it is important once the child is inside the home to emphasize that the nonsense outside the home has nothing to do with the values inside the home. Sometimes doing silly things together like playing with the cats or whatever it takes to laugh TOGETHER can emotionally tide you through difficult times. I do believe that emphasizing common values in the household like education has a way of helping you through the difficult years. Remember too that when they are away at college you will wish you had some of those moments together again, no matter how difficult they were.

[@WeatherAnchorMama]

+Javier Panadero Thanks so much! Makes perfect sense :)

[@humbled1490]

I can certainly relate, I have s 13yo biracial son with curly hair and the most amazing green eyes. I had the same concerns of identity crisis, however we talk on individual strengths he possess and learning about his background from both cultures seems to encourage him to continue being strong academically and athletically..They really have the best of both worlds. By the way, I love your daughter curly hair, she will too grow into the skin she’s in, confidently.

[@roeluvsparis]

I'm the aunt of a lot of biracial nieces and nephews. They are comfortable in their skins with both races. They know they're mixed. I don't know how it happened, but they've been taught to respect both races. I have to say that they know they're considered black. We've never played the race card. Funny I don't know how they're so excepting but, at this moment, watching this video, I'm proud. I remember one Neice who is now a mother used to want to be black because, like your son, she was plenty light, but with clearly Afro hair. We simply told her "that's what you are. That's how GOD made you. You are special -- not for your skin color or hair. You are made in the image of GOD." Eventually, she got it🙏🏿

[@soniawright1099]

so are you saying Black is Trouble. your children are Black mam, don't get it twisted

[@travelingdude1621]

Saying biracial kids are black is insulting. That’s very insulting to black people because real black people have two black, biological parents.

[@LoveInTheCity]

My daughter is Bi-racial and 23 years old but when she was in first grade her school here in Atlanta was multi-racial, Where do you guys live?

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+Love In The City We're in NY. THe first thing many think about NYC is that's it's a melting pot and it is. But we live in the suburbs and in some areas there is an underlying segregation throughout the towns. The more I attend meetings at my daughter's school, the more families like us we see. There is a good mix of white, black, hispanic, and Asian. But the public schools aren't as mixed. She attends private school.

[@LoveInTheCity]

Wow thanks for sharing that... New York is awesome I think wish I lived there I'm surprised about the schooling I hope you guys find a resolution. As far as the hair thing goes with your daughter mine was the same when she was younger now @ 23 she loves her curls. Stay positive your family is beautiful

[@dmitrypogorely2808]

First of all thank you for the video, Its good to hear various opinions and learn about how to raise Biracial Kids these days. I think it mostly depends on where you live. Like personally here in Montreal I see alot of Biracial kids and no one since to mind that. Me myself im with a Haitian Girl and we both wonder how our kids are gonna look like in the future. I believe its essential to let the kids know that everyone is gonna be judged whether they're black or white, its just easier to except and make sure she loves herself the way she is. All the best to you and your husband. Take care.

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+Dmitry Pogorely You hit the nail on the head. Yes, there are some places that have a higher racial tolerance that others. In addition to that, it's important to be ready to answer any questions or concerns children may have. Kids see the difference in physical appearance, color etc. My daughter has had concerns and my husband and I have been very open and honest with her. We also make it a point to talk about racial identity.

[@kims9012]

My husband and I are in an interracial marriage. We have one child, a girl who is 8. We have voiced many of these same concerns. My daughter wants her hair to "move" like her friends and doesn't completely understand why we get such strange looks (we live in SC), but we make an effort everyday to show her how beautiful and unique she is. We have had long talks about how she is not just "white" or "black" and that she is biracial and that she is a product of so much love. We do worry though as she gets older where exactly she will find her place. That she won't be "black enough" for the black kids or "white enough" for the white kids... As a parent you are concerned with these things. As much as possible we try to show/tell her how she doesn't need to find or "pick" a side. Befriend everyone. People are people. There are good and bad that come in all colors and to try to surround herself with the good from all races. God will take care of the rest. You have a beautiful family. Thank you for sharing.

[@AnastasiaPauline]

I know the feeling. That's why it was so important for us to talk about it with her. My daughter felt the same as your daughter but not anymore. She isn't interested in straightening her hair.

[@beljones6659]

I have biracial grandchildren, cousins, and a nephew. We live in a town where there are many biracial children, its just a fact of life. My nephew's mother moved to an all white small town when he was younger, and she immediately learned that was not a good place for him, so she ended up coming back. My grandchildren live in a very racist town, with few black people. I worry a great deal for them, but they are still very young. Here in our town being biracial is normal and everyone has friendships with all races. They are all very open-minded and it is very comforting. Of course they pick on each other and point out their differences, but that is normal teenage behavior. You just have to make sure your children are confident and comfortable in their own skin, or place them somewhere where they will be accepted.

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+Belinda Jones Absolutely. I agree with you 100 percent. SOrry to hear about your nephew. Kudos to his mom for moving back to a place where he's comfortable. My husband and I like to address this topic because there are parents like us who ignore the problems biracial kids face. It's important to face these issues head on.

[@pattijohnson9257]

My daughters are biracial. They are grown now, but it was a difficult road. I was honest with them about the world around them and let them know how special they were.

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+patti johnson I'm so happy to know that. Honesty is so important.

[@winchester896]

I live in the UK I have three children who identify themselves as mixed race(black and white). They have embraced both sides.....of course as they grow the have had insecurity but I'm sure we have all experienced that. I feel it's really important to talk, encourage, support and provide guidance to our children as they grow and develop. My children are now in their 20s very intelligent and productive individual who had made us very proud indeed.

[@erinthomas2127]

Thank you so much for these videos. I am a white grandmother with a biracial granddaughter. My daughter was looking for a preschool and her mother in law who is black recommend a great preschool. So my husband and I picked her up and there was not one white kid. The school seems great and I know it’s important she is accepted by both races but it has caused some tension in the older family members thinking my granddaughter is going to be Raised black? What does that even mean? And will that be a problem for white people to accept her?

[@josephboyd4406]

Guys ,just love your beautiful little daughter and son. God will help you and them to get through it. True beauty, comes from the heart.

[@StacyAnnGooden]

+Joseph Boyd Thanks so much!

[@GigiAzmy]

This was great. I'm looking for more education for my kids. Let if there is a good book on this AND I HOPE YOU MAKE A FOLLOW UP VIDEO ❣️❣️❣️

[@goldennella]

im sorry to say that, but this video is kinda weird!! why will it be hard to send a biracial child to school? how about you move to Canada, their is no such issue when you have biracial children, its very normal here!! wow!! Im married to a white man, and no big deal!! wow!! American still have race issues!! WE see biracial couples, children... everywhere here!! No big deal!! I feel so sad and surprise at the same time!! If you do a KZbin search about interracial, biracial, Canadian biracial, there is none on KZbin, because it is not a BIG deal here, In Canada, biracial or even multiracial people are are popular at school, I don't understand Americans mentality sometimes!!

[@bevhall2833]

She his so beautifull she like her dad I myself are b racial mix with Indian and black very proud of my mix cultures that what you want to say to them to be proud of who they are

[@traciluv2739]

There is a video on youtube of three very intelligent multi- racial young ladies. who are very well aware of who they are and the struggles. It is call Interacial dating & diversity Ep. 5 the slumber party. Very interesting what they have to say.

[@xwalkingkateastrophe]

Can you recommend any books for this please?

[@Phillymall]

Race is still a very taboo topic to discuss unfortunately. As I see the fact that we fear the discussion as the root cause of the problem. I am glad I found this video, it was so candid. Bill DeBlasio, NYC's mayor, got blasted for saying the same thing you just said about your son. I fear for these young black kids, boys in particular. It seems you are doing a great job of having that dialogue with your daughter. Keep up the good work.

[@WeatherAnchorMama]

+Jay Ray Thanks so much. Yea, for some reason some people feel comfortable talking about race. That shouldn't be the case. :)

[@alexandareanna3601]

I'm a product of a biracial family (moms white and dads black) I'm dating a white person, all my life I've been exposed to the white culture. And an all white school. I always felt different. And I had friends but not "true friends" in grade-school (I was always the second choice friend because I was "black")

[@lindamurphy2776]

I have a biracial daughter. She looks more white than your kids. She has no problem. She identifies with white race more but has Black friends also. Think u both r making it a problem. Ur child's dk8n is that or lot of my Black family. They should have no more problems than Black or white children.who have features they don't like. You r born with certain features. Teach ur kids 2 love who they r. Blue eyes brown eyes. Straight hair curly hair. U all should go 2 a counselor 2 learn a difference makes for a more I interesting world. Find a local church n let God help u 2 LOVE THE SKIN U R. N !

[@jamesmaps956]

First of all by mixed children should be raised by mixed race parents

[@giovonnittidrachiavelli1490]

P.s im multiracial

[@stellawilliamson1693]

This is really sad when your child cries because they want straight hair and want to be the color of white kids you need to tell biracial kids the truth you are more black than white you took after mommy side more black than white make friends with both races whites does not except biracial kids as blacks does especially if they are more black than white it's your responsibility to talk to them truthfully God bless beautiful family

[@bobregular9780]

I’m glad your not making her pick a side and let her know about Obama and tia and Tamara also Halley berry let her know she is beautiful and love.

[@youngloud4952]

You guys are awsome and also seemed very prepaired for whats is to come in the near future.

[@WeatherAnchorMama]

Young & Loud life is so unpredictable but we try to be prepared. Thanks so much for watching.

[@oceansofthoughts8712]

Jamaica is a melting pot of different races... black white chinese indian etc...a West Indian mix...sunny day!

[@oceansofthoughts8712]

I have been following your videos these last few days. This one about the biracial talk.. I am kind of disappointment. You said you are Jamaican . ? Did you grow up in the West Indies? You should know that there are many different shades of colour in black... black people. Your children are considered black . As long as there is a pinch of the black race in your beautiful children, they are considered to be black. i used to be label as the nanny for my daughter as well . Until I would surprise dem... yes I de mother...But my daughter quickly digested the cultural fact that she is black from baby...so she could identify herself in school...No mistake... Clear shinned as de Jamaican say... fair shinned as the West Indian may say... my dear you are so beautiful but that kind of talk ...I don't understand...obviously if this an issue with the children it is because maybe you may not have exposed them enough to your culture..so that they would understand that there are several shades of black. All beautiful . Suppose your next child comes out dark like you...what would happen? And this is not a big science these days.... in a family of four girls, all different shades of black.. same parents and grands..i can testify..I saw your video in Jamaica. Lovely. I just thought i would share my thoughts.

[@WeatherAnchorMama]

Thanks for sharing. Yes. I'm from Jamaica and I'm well aware of our motto, "out of many, one." We come in all shades. Many may consider our children black, but they are also white. My husband and I choose to teach them about their heritage (both sides). To omit their Dad's background, means to negate his heritage. That's not fair. As they get older, they can choose for themselves. But as parents, we have a duty to provide them with knowledge about our family history.

[@oceansofthoughts8712]

You all are responsible for that part of education for your children. In the 1960s this was an issue. Two sisters going to different schools because of shades of black. In England...testimony. Boys don't digest those ignorances. The conversation is really surprising from educated young people. Plant the truth in those children early in life. Well... i am very mixed with multi races Indian Irish White Black etc... but you either black or white..... West Indian mix... its the human race... a melting pot of cultures. The applications in life do not ask list your mix... beautiful children plant beautiful minds.... your husband don't pay that any attention from what i see.. he is right... you have an issue cut out for you ....

[@travelingdude1621]

You have beautiful kids but racially speaking, they are biracial. That means they are not white or black but both at the same time.