My Wife Caught Me Cheating, How do We Move Forward?

[@pmeehan_3]

They've only been married a year! ONE YEAR and he's already pulling this nonsense.

[@jonathankabasele985]

Even after 10 years, still bad lol

[@raallen1468]

He's always cheated on her..... He finally got caught. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@jazrerunt6868]

Thats exactly what I was thinking.....

[@byefelicia8632]

Yes. He’s a serial cheater. Its pretty obvious. He doesn’t know what real commitment is.

[@rasantos4538]

@@byefelicia8632 serial cheater? 😂 that’s new for me but I totally agree!

[@SaltwaterRebellion]

What I'm hearing is, I hurt my wife deeply but I'm tired of suffering the consequences of my actions. Unbelievable.

[@sharalli3112]

Yep 👆🏼

[@FirstnameLastname-et3fy]

Thats at least better than just completely ignoring the issue and letting the relationship go stale. I think you took it the wrong way

[@hawihawi9260]

I hate when they rush u to get over it

[@clarissaubben7884]

💯

[@kayrenallen7369]

I’m glad he did not have a physical affair that would be much worse. It’s a good thing he came forward because they do need counseling together to make it work obviously something was already wrong before this emotional affair and I agree with the other writer that it’s better he came forward than let the separation cause a stale ruined marriage where they just stay miserable for life.

[@veracityhunter7777]

Even his initial admission, he tried to depersonalize it by saying there was an act of infidelity in the marriage. No bro, you cheated. Say it and own it.

[@toomuchinformation]

Your user name is apt.......esp in this case.

[@ChrisAndCats]

He didn't even say there was infidelity - he said "we" had an act of infidelity in the marriage, as if the wife joined in! "We" didn't have an act....*HE* had an act of infidelity. She just got stuck with the aftermath.

[@LOLZHAHANOTFUNNY]

I'm a pregnant wife myself, and the MOMENT he said they are expecting a child I had to pause the video and calm down. You just left a scar on your wife's heart and soul that will never fade, I need you to know that you just killed her self esteem in one of the most trying times of her life. Where is the humanity and respect and EMPATHY?

[@benjamingreen9540]

It’s not that simple. He was certainly in the wrong for seeking a woman outside of his marriage, but it most likely wasn’t done with malicious intent. He probably felt a he wasn’t getting something from his wife, and instead of communicating it to her directly, he sought it out elsewhere.

[@linjubar]

Probably true, but it still destroys the trust she had in him. Personally, I could never trust a betrayal. Once trust is gone, it’s gone. That doesn’t mean they can’t stay together, but the relationship is forever changed.

[@LOLZHAHANOTFUNNY]

@@linjubar I agree with this. Intent is one thing, but choosing to not keep yourself in check as the husband decided not to was a choice nonetheless. He ultimately had no concern for how this made his wife feel. His intent could have been innocent, but this is not the reality of the literal actions he took.

[@elizabetha8565]

I just wonder why she got pregnant AFTER finding this out. And I don't understand how emailing an x is cheating anyways.

[@benjamingreen9540]

@@elizabetha8565 emotional cheating

[@sabrinadunn8099]

I just hate the way he kept phrasing it. "we were involved in a lack of fidelity" you mean you cheated on your wife???

[@NT-bz5nh]

So pathetic. I’m afraid he’s not ready to change evidenced by how he said “we”. “We” didn’t do this. “You” did.

[@catblack4091]

Ramblings of a narcissist. Poor woman, he won't change.

[@itzelmayoral729]

EQUALS TO still not taking responsibility

[@lynnebucher6537]

He's totally trying to avoid taking responsibility for his behavior. Needs to grow up.

[@tubeloobs]

Kept saying it? Didn't he only say it once?

[@WH2012]

Under EVERY circumstance, cheaters DESERVE to be abandoned.

[@annstewart8506]

Exactly! husband of 23 years was promptly divorced when I found out he was cheating. Done deal!

[@stevendavis5095]

@@annstewart8506did you remarry or are you just alone? Lmao

[@annstewart8506]

@stevendavis5095 Hi! I just put myself on dating market after 7 years. I met a lovely man at work a month ago. He is a doctor who has been alone a few years as he was widowed. It is early days but, I am the marrying type. Watch this space I guess. Take care.

[@JakeStewart1343]

​@@stevendavis5095 She might not be with us anymore 😢

[@karinaz8756]

@@stevendavis5095rather be “alone” and happy than in a relationship where you aren’t respected.

[@ruraljuror6585]

One thing men who do this don't realize until too late is how this affects their wives sexual function, for years or even forever. He is now unsafe which equals yucky.

[@krystalgardiner5591]

Yup!

[@standground8284]

Why don't women just keep it simple and divorce at the first instance of cheating instead of staying around and complaining about it? Since an apology and redemption is completely off the table.

[@grcarie]

​@@standground8284no one said apology and redemption are off the table, but the sad fact remains that the person who strayed will likely try to move on and act as if they did nothing wrong rather than trying to MAKE AMENDS and heal the part of themselves and their relationship that is broken. You don't just give up on your commitments and the person you love. You try to find out: 1) why did they do this? 2) What are their triggers/temptations? 3) how can I prevent this from happening again? 4) will I ever be able to trust this person again? 5) what should I do to focus on myself and my own healing so that I can trust this person again? In the end you find out that all you can do is forgive them (DO NOT FORGET) but hold them accountable, and accept the fact that they are flawed human beings, and you will never be able to trust them 100%, and in reality, you should NEVER trust any human person 100%. Only GOD deserves that level of trust. In the end, the only person any individual can focus on and change is themselves, and the only person who can bring about a change in their partner is the God that created them.

[@veronicav575]

@@standground8284 a lot of reasons. Some stay because they get guilt tripped into it, gaslit, etc. some stay “for the kids”, some stay because of social pressure. Some stay because they would be financially ruined. There’s a variety of reasons. But the OP means about the woman’s sexuality being ruined from this, women can almost never orgasm with out feeling fully trusting and safe with their partner. Feeling like you aren’t good enough bc of infidelity will always be in the back of their mind.

[@TatyanaKosh]

@@standground8284men do that too. Why do men stick around cheating wives trying to make things better?

[@ModernSouthernBelle]

I caught my ex trying to cheat (basically harassing one of his subordinates at work. She didn’t want anything to do with him). I was 3 months pregnant. We went to therapy (couples and individual). He was moved to another office and did the same thing (and was fired). I was done. I wish I’d left without trying to “fix” things. Some people are not monogamous or loyal and no amount of therapy will change that. I just wasted my own time.

[@Coananlover]

You didn't waste your time. You'll always know that you tried and that's important. If you hadn't at least attempted to mend things there would certainly be moments where you'd look back and go "Could we have worked things out?" You did the right thing and proved that you were the bigger person and the better person.

[@Lianne459]

Men who cheat once will always do it. Cut your losses ladies

[@cjschneidt9089]

People only change when they want to which is rarely. We will never be able to change the people we care about. Only they can.

[@Openingtheshadow]

Good for you. Dodged that bullet for the rest of your life girl! Congrats on your baby!

[@lousunny5682]

I actually think it’s brave you left. And I think it’s normal to feel like why didn’t I leave early. It’s ok. It’s ok to have loved and lost. But at least he got burned and hopefully you find peace.

[@sweetgirl4u247]

When someone cheats, I am sorry... the trust will never be there again. Good luck.

[@mistercontroversial]

Cheaters are such scumbags. For a man to cheat on his PREGNANT wife, he would have to be the lowest. I feel bad for her. Let it be known that cheaters usually do not regret cheating, they regret getting caught.

[@wintrstk54]

Not defending his actions but she got pregnant afterwards, which kinda brings up more questions....

[@byefelicia8632]

@@wintrstk54 Admit it. You’re another cheater defending your fellow brother 😄Oversimplifications and specifics don’t matter. He cheated on his prego wife. His cheese went inside some other woman while the other one was carrying his lasagne. C’mon. There’s no more baking left in this marriage. Everything is burnt and its time to switch off the oven and order a replacement.

[@SarahR2D2]

Endangering her and the unborn child

[@appleforever6664]

If men are going to let the snake out of the cage, be stealthy. 😂

[@Lianne459]

At least he didnt have to pay the stripper 130k

[@sup_monica3597]

Omg he sounds like an awful person. Cheating after being married for less than a year? This woman needs to leave him

[@jordanferguson2254]

If he's such a smart and awesome king, why get married to someone who wasn't meeting his needs?

[@veronicav575]

@@dabd8175 🧌

[@CyeOutsider]

​@dabd8175 Nice victim blaming. Typical narcissist comment - "my bad behaviour is always someone else's fault".

[@UnstoppableMorgan]

Don’t forget about the baby! He made sure to knock her up first before he decided to rip apart her self-esteem, destroy her dream of having a beautiful marriage and family under same roof. This guy is a loser.

[@frumpusnumpus]

So glad Dr. John called him out from the first sentence. YOU cheated! Not, WE were involved in a lack of fidelity. That's politician speak for 'I'm a loser'.

[@Crazyced]

I wish he held cheating and 'open relationship' wives to the same level of accountability.

[@bcarr2595]

I listened to one of his shows where the wife wanted an open relationship & Dr DeLony pretty much told him that his marriage is over. He didn't hold back bcuz the roles were switched.

[@aleia4654]

✨an act of infidelity occurred within my marriage✨is an interesting way to say “I cheated on my wife”. ✨an unforeseen misappropriation of funds occurred within my company✨ - “I embezzled money” ✨a sudden uptick of criminality hit my neighbourhood✨ - “I’ve been robbing my neighbours houses”

[@deem.4527]

Crazy concept: If you don’t want to get caught cheating, just ✨don’t✨.

[@nonamehi]

Dont.. Get caught?

[@BeGlamourlicious]

@@nonamehi don’t cheat.

[@shinnosukenohara3522]

@@nonamehi hahahaja

[@NIkki-ox1ej]

Exactly, If you don’t want to get caught cheating, just don’t cheat

[@JAYCEE-xm5dd]

Wish it was that ez.

[@Reshme77]

My wife caught me cheating...how do we move past it....? ...you don't.

[@CyeOutsider]

I know right. He's just blithely assuming they can.

[@jennifersteen8236]

This exact scenario actually happened to me as well. My husband "found out " that his high school sweetheart is now separated from her husband and has moved back into town right around to corner from us and he thought it would be a wonderful idea to reach out to her . Unbeknownst to him I could see everything going on between them from our home computer. I saw everything. This is not the first time I've caught him this way reaching out to other women in this same way. He had been doing this for years with 6 other women . I was able to view receipts of gifts he had sent as well. The obvious reaching out and so badly wanting to connect/ be with his high-school sweetheart was the straw that broke the camels back. It's been almost 3 years and I'm still not over it. He shattered everything within myself right down to my core and then he shattered my core. I'm an empty shell of my former self. I won't ever ever recover from that terrible feeling that I truly have been second best all these years. So , to answer the question: Yeah, there is no moving past this. Period. The only reason I function and get out of bed in the morning is for the kids. I'm just an emotionless robot at this point. On auto pilot. Going through the motions of life.

[@calgal5752]

You may but she never will

[@gurucarcar]

Not even married a year??? Disgusting.

[@nicolcacola]

He seems more disappointed she found out. Poor woman. This is seemingly going to end badly.

[@benjamingreen9540]

What do you mean by that first part?

[@raallen1468]

@@benjamingreen9540 The husband wishes he hadn't been caught.

[@kateg9437]

@@benjamingreen9540 he doesn't regret what he did, he regrets that he wasn't secretive enough to get away with it

[@AbbygaileHearne]

Yep.. he has the nerve to word it like she was apart of it, very manipulative

[@laylarahman11]

I can't hear a shred of remorse in his voice. Sounds like 'just another day of mismanagement'.

[@COINsimp2024]

As a woman it would annoy the crap out of me if after being cheated on, I then had to go to therapy with the cheater. Imagine dealing with his issues all the time.

[@standground8284]

Why don't women just keep it simple and divorce at the first instance of cheating instead of staying around and complaining about it? Since an apology and redemption is completely off the table.

[@COINsimp2024]

@@standground8284 I agree with you, this is why I don't feel sorry for Ariana.

[@jborrego2406]

@@standground8284cause if there pregnant or have kids they don’t wanna break up the house and now you have single mom stigma on u

[@CyeOutsider]

​​@standground8284 Why don't men just keep it simple and divorce their wives if they want to cheat? Since behaving like a grown up and dealing with their issues is completely off the table for them?

[@COINsimp2024]

@@CyeOutsider exactly

[@PKr_0]

As a pregnant wife going through this in our first year. I don’t want to stay. At all.

[@karri8998]

I am so sorry you are going through that. HUGS to you.

[@ayo_k32]

Paused at the first 11 seconds. Blown away by the dismissive way he described what he did. Unbelievable. But I guess when you have the nerve to cheat, you have no problem avoiding accountability for it either.

[@nancybrozo3313]

He is disappointed he was caught. Your right KB on how dismissive he is. Trust is gone. Feel sorry for what his newly married and pregnant wife is going through.

[@luminous6969]

He said the words, "and I was the one at fault" in the second part of his very first sentence. How is taking full responsibility being dismissive?

[@TartarianTopG]

At least he had the nerve to call in

[@sfappetrupavelandrei]

Maybe he was too ashamed of himself?...

[@KnicksNYanks84]

How dare he message his ex. This is unacceptable.

[@zettaclark3213]

Yes, this guy killed her self esteem. It just keeps happening. Ladies, get a good education because you'll need to support yourself.

[@KS-cl8br]

Dump him. If he cheats once you can NEVER trust him to not cheat on you again.

[@USA-GreedyMenOfNoIntegrity]

“It wasn’t physical”. Don’t believe a cheater. They will lie, deny and minimize. GPS tracker, trail cams and voice activated recorders can bust them quicker than anything. “What was missing inside of him?” I know, INTEGRITY.

[@altenberg-greifenstein]

It is physical the moment he is taking the hand to himself and imagines doing the other one.

[@MW-oy6vk]

If this guy hadn’t been caught, I’m sure he would still be involved with another woman.

[@calibrial]

100% right!

[@rebeccaR22]

For surrrrrreeeeee

[@Jane5720]

Oh, he probably will do it again

[@scrapykat3028]

It would have moved to physical!

[@Coananlover]

"There's still bad days too." Well, whose fault is that?

[@monettevalliere]

Lol

[@rachelgooden9981]

I wanted that phrase to be addressed

[@Kinglore2000]

Social media sucks. And this is one of the many reasons why it sucks. Some people leave your life for a reason. We shouldn't be reaching back out to them. It's a trap.

[@Mint-kj9kw]

Yes....I always say life was so much simpler (and peaceful) before I had a computer/smartphone...before I had access to Google/Redditt/ Quora/KZbin...

[@salonsavy6476]

No social media for me 🚫

[@rosac464]

No one forces anyone to cheat. Cheaters always find a way.

[@rachelhelman2098]

@@rosac464 I agree only now there's a digital trail! Easier to cheat but also easier to catch them out! Anyone who thinks they can get away with it is deluded, it always comes back to bite

[@staceystrukel1917]

He would have done it without Social media. The problem is HIM.

[@saribrown7156]

This man makes me worried. They have only been married for a year, and he already cheated. Plus, he seemed very blase about it, too.

[@vickimerritt2832]

kinda cheating on his honeymoon

[@CyeOutsider]

Yes exactly, if you're cheating after only 1 year, the relationship is doomed.

[@calgal5752]

Exactly

[@sarahalderman3126]

I feel so badly for this woman. I was that wife 20 years ago… I definitely should have left. Once a cheater always a cheater.

[@brightpage1020]

Thank you.

[@matinaki1644]

Please share your experience since there are many women out there giving a free pass to many POS out there. Only 0,01% may actually deserve forgiveness.

[@UncleMichaelable]

Whatever happened to people telling others that they are fucked up and wrong. This holding peoples hands needs to stop. He’s an adulterer. Period.

[@lorrainem8234]

💯

[@nikki8947]

I am now divorced. I caught my ex-husband being unfaithful the same week we found out I was pregnant. This was well over 13 years ago, but hearing this brought back so much pain. This guy really has NO idea the damage he has caused. Seriously sick to my stomach right now. He's robbed her in so many ways and she deserves better.

[@joycetheobald1717]

Once he said she got pregnant AFTER the betrayal, I realised that this is what's sometimes called a "Band-Aid Baby". I've seen happen in two friend's marriages thinking they would save their relationships because of cheating. The cheating still didn't stop! Both are now toxic environments for those innocent babies. 😢

[@karri8998]

I am thinking he will be cheating on her again as well.

[@SUZANNECARPENTER-ou3je]

While I was pregnant, my ex told me he could have went out with four different people but didn't because I was pregnant. The message I heard was that he didn't go because I was pregnant, and not because he loved me. I should have walked out that day, but it took me two years to go.

[@anthonylozano8035]

If you can’t say no to your flesh, your petty lustful desires you don’t deserve to even partake in a relationship much less a marriage. Any man who betrays his wife has failed the duty of a loving and caring husband. The man is to lay down his life for his wife and the wife, to respect and honor him. We have multiple problems in this generation. Those problems are lack of self control, a plethora of options, and an inability to put God in the center of our relationships

[@SarahR2D2]

God needs to be a the forefront. Only the fear of the Lord will keep us strong. How many biblical men have fallen due to lust??? It can happen to any man without the fear of the Lord

[@racpatrice]

👏👏👏

[@loliwemoyo5680]

Mans supposed to honor the woman too.

[@anthonylozano8035]

@@loliwemoyo5680 did I not just describe honoring the woman. The woman has an obligation to submit and respect her husband regardless of the husband honors her.

[@loliwemoyo5680]

@@anthonylozano8035 hmm I've been conflicted with that idea of submitting to just anyone cause I've seen many women loose their faith by submitting to fools. Imagine missing out on the kingdom because of a tempting husband. Philipians 2:12 talks about working out your salvation with fear and trembling I've been asking the spirit how that is possible when the head is leading you away from God. I met a 50yr old lady who left her husband cause it her faith in Christ was suffering. Studied the Ephesians 5....growing heard the women submit part preached really loud but not the men honor her part.

[@cg741graf5]

He just didn’t get far cheating because he was caught. He needs to understand she will never 100 percent trust him again. It doesn’t happen. She will move to return trust but it will never be 100: Let’s be real real on that.

[@isay207]

Why did they get pregnant very bad timing

[@Reevay762]

Oh that's very true. She will NEVER trust him again.

[@annaelisavettavonnedozza9607]

She’ll heal properly when she comes to her senses & leaves him.

[@vaska1999]

Exactly!

[@DogMommy.]

Hope one day I'm that girl Im 27 and he is 37 .My boyfriend of 4 years was messaging and flirting with this married girl from work. We have a 3 year old together and im just honestly lost for worlds and can't stop crying. 😢 like idk how to leave.and right now I feel so ugly and useless.

[@theoblongbox4909]

Yeah, a person doesn't just get over infidelity in a couple of months. Your therapist should have told you that (if they are a marriage counselor that is). There will be bad days here and there FOREVER due to your infidelity. FOREVER.

[@rachelann724]

I agree. I found out my husband had cheated in 2016 and there’s still days I’m angry or paranoid he’s doing it again. It’s almost impossible to build back the trust

[@standground8284]

Why don't women just keep it simple and divorce at the first instance of cheating instead of staying around and complaining about it? Since an apology, working it out and redemption is completely off the table.

[@jborrego2406]

@@standground8284 and you’re the same guy that would say women are more likely to force the men

[@standground8284]

@@jborrego2406 You’re wrong, I wrote what I wrote. I the type of guy who encourages people to divorce their spouse who cheated. That route seems better than sitting around being whiny and holding a grudge over your cheating spouse since you decided to stay with them.

[@tanash1991]

Why do people constantly assume that when someone cheats it’s because the other person wasn’t giving them what they need. Many times the person is a terrific partner and the other chooses to cheat regardless. The mouth is there fir a reason if your missing something from a relationship that deserves a conversation with your spouse and more often than not a loving partner will be happy to meet their need.

[@BeGlamourlicious]

The cheater is the looser. All the blame is on the person that cheated. When your partner is horrible, as a „normal“ person you just leave and don’t cheat.

[@altenberg-greifenstein]

Exactly. If you do not like the marriage you have, leave, and after that start something with someone else! There is simply no excuse for cheating, especially if you are hiding it and would continue if not found out.

[@AbbaJoy1]

Oh my goodness! I justified my husband's behavior because his father mistreated him and he lacked the self-esteem to talk to me. I just realized how ridiculous that is when I read your comment. Oh, well, it was forty years ago. So at least I wasn't angry at him while I was raising our children without him or his child support ( or his interference.). At least I didn't mess my kids up by being angry. They grew up to be great husbands and fathers.

[@amanchoudhury8135]

Because they forget the one who cheated made a decision and now dealing with the consequences. I am telling you from my own experience me and my ex gf were great for 4 yrs (3 yrs together and 1yr long distance) in the going to be 5th yr both of us didn't and couldn't make enough time or efforts to talk or spend time with each other so we broke up . She and i never ever thought of cheating even after staying in 2 different countries. These people just need excuses.

[@gurucarcar]

Enough with this arrogant dude. He doesn't take responsibility. Hope he takes the coming of his child seriously.

[@Justsayingthat]

It is difficult as a woman to ever look at him and feel safe. Really difficult. Now she is pregnant and she may stay just for that. Bad situation

[@soni05131]

Oh yeah let's bring a child into this mess. Wow, dude!!

[@Audra94braun]

Cheating is the immature wiring of the brain to default to sneaking rather than confronting issues as they come up. It’s the process of slowly granting yourself permission to betray the relationship. You HAVE to confront this immaturity before trying to build a family. Cheating is cancer in the foundation.

[@hillarybillary21]

You missed desire and intent. They don’t care

[@myrtlebeachsara]

Less than a year married, got her pregnant and cheated, girl leave.runnnnnnnnnn

[@isay207]

Poor child

[@eventhere2788]

I'm so sorry but if I was the woman, I'd say you want me to go to couples therapy when he was the cheater who screwed it up - no way! After one year of marriage and he cheated. End it now. He didn't sound remorseful. He didn't sound like he owned it. He didn't sound ashamed. He didn't sound like he got how devastating this news was to his wife. She's better off cutting her losses, focusing on the baby and getting well. My ex cheated on me the entire 3 years we were married. I was scared with an 18 month old and pregnant but leaving the Ex was the best thing I did since he lacked maturity to handle the responsibility of our marriage and children.

[@Cafeallday222]

Agree! Get the hell out of there!!

[@bah-bah29hinks7]

“We had an incident.”🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@chelseaandrews200]

That is the most interesting way I have heard someone say "I cheated on my wife." Like, huh?? 🤣😳

[@kiwiskiwi]

yeah, I've seen this happen, I don't think they realize how stupid and dishonest it makes them look. There's no softening the blow, just spit it out and stop dancing around with words.

[@TomikaKelly]

Right, like the infidelity HAPPENED to them, not like it was CAUSED by him and because of him.

[@charlescurtis6321]

Can imagine it’s hard to say it full stop on a public radio show, but yeah. Gotta own up, glad Dr D did that off the bat. He called in anyway so 🤷🏼‍♂️

[@KnicksNYanks84]

He emailed another woman other than his wife. I don’t know what he said but this is incredibly inappropriate and she should leave him.

[@hamsternationrules7144]

Right?? Why can people who cheat never just fess up and call it what it is! I felt the same when Will Smiths wife said she got caught in “an entanglement”. 🤔🤔🤔 What do you mean??

[@altenberg-greifenstein]

I like how the therapist is like "work on it!" and the audience is like "once a cheater, always a cheater, run, girl, run now!"

[@CyeOutsider]

Because no every cheater actually works on it or goes to therspt

[@vaska1999]

The therapist cheated on his own wife, once.

[@32dramaqueen]

@@vaska1999 Did he really??

[@matinaki1644]

He is not going to say "leave your wife". No therapist does that. It is in their interest to appear neutral and advocate a peaceful solution. Then it is up to the couple to work it out or not.

[@ElizabethGeiger-ye1sf]

​@@vaska1999He did? I knew this guy seemed untrustworthy. His wife should get herself a guy on the side.

[@intuitive_duck]

I'd judge my friend for cheating on their husband or wife. I'd be so disappointed in them. IMO once you cheat it's over.

[@dghvdhfhhb6405]

My friends covered for me cheating on my gf & I covered for them cheating on their gfs too. It’s a Bro/friend code never rat them out of course when they do something illegal then you can

[@nonamehi]

@@dghvdhfhhb6405 so two scumbags who are disloyal to their spouses think they can be loyal to eachother. Pathetic. Ur loyal friend would sleep with your spouse if they could

[@altenberg-greifenstein]

Yeah, I told my female best friend my opinion on what she was doing and she was laughing about my morals.

[@TheEquiss]

Truth

[@blueseptember2174]

​@@dghvdhfhhb6405you need new friends that hold you to a higher standard of being an honest man.

[@EmpressMermaid]

I'll give a smidgen of a benefit of doubt to a guy who approaches the situation with "I was unfaithful and I'm all in and need to know how I can make it better." But not "my wife caught me, how can I make her not be mad at me now?" And yes, I'd feel the same if the "he" and "she" were reversed.

[@kingstonlion73]

Let's share our private information with our friends further embarrassing my wife. That's terrible idea.

[@blueseptember2174]

Whether she stays or goes it will come out. Might as well get the help.

[@CyeOutsider]

Not ideal, but forcing his wife to keep her hurt and pain to herself so that he doesn't look bad due to his behaviour is unfair and wrong. He's isolating her from the people she needs support from, just so he doesn't have to face further consequences for his behaviour. That will only make things worse.

[@Cafeallday222]

I’d be talking to friends, I’d need to talk to them. He cheated so talking to my friends WOULD happen.

[@kamichia1]

I don't believe that she now has full access to his social media, emails, cell phone, etc. He has probably "agreed to show if she asks." That is way different than being transparent and open. Jack sounds like a whiner who is tired of suffering for his mistake.

[@ecclesiastesThreeVerseSeven]

She only has access to what he wants her to have access to.

[@linjubar]

I think sharing with another couple may well ruin the friendship. That’s a lot to put on another couple. They are not therapists, and it can make it very awkward for them. Keep your private business private, unless it’s a therapist, or a very trusted friend who won’t go blabbing their mouth to everyone.

[@carstuff4u942]

Yes, very true!!

[@exxology1]

Ya I thought that was super strange advice.. if she feels like confiding in a friend that’s one thing but don’t like sit them down & put all this on them!

[@brookesmith1550]

Exactly! He gave bad advice! That couple can’t help unless they have been through the same thing.

[@em77775]

True! Our marriage counselor told us not to divulge the dirty details to others, especially family and close friends, because they will be on your side and obviously not be happy with the cheater. It'll always change the way they look at the other person. I do think being mentored by another, more experienced couple is a good idea -- just don't share the infidelity part unless you really feel you can trust them after some time, maybe.

[@2daFull]

My wife and I meet with couples all of the time to help us with our relationship. We have grown so much from it. I couldn't imagine having no one to talk to unless I was paying by the hour lol

[@nellieponks]

Whatever he has admitted to happened will be far less than what he actually did.

[@UnstoppableMorgan]

Damn John, you were super easy on this guy! What makes y’all think that someone is still worthy of having their partner when they cheat on them?

[@KH-xx1rg]

The caller never answered the questions directly! It’s killing me. He’s walking around the truth and not taking any accountability.

[@AbbygaileHearne]

I think this is one of the worst episodes to air, he never actually answered

[@70s80sVintage]

There is NO CIRCUMSTANCE - NONE - where cheating should be tolerated or ignored. There is NO RECOVERY. I hate that people fool themselves into thinking you can move forward. False advice.

[@matinaki1644]

It is extremely rare. I have seen certain scenarios (in series and movies) when it happens after some SERIOUS disconnect and yes, there could be love, but the disconnect was stronger and cheating happened out of desperation. But as I said, it is rare.

[@dswilliams2686]

"WE" had infidelity in "OUR" marriage. Smearing the guilt on the marriage instead of HIM.

[@nikki27ish]

Divorce, he only seems sorry he got caught not that he tried cheating on his wife.

[@bluehawaii1631]

I hate cheaters especially married ones. Trust is broken. Leave.

[@amorl4520]

I was married only 1yr or so had newborn was husband was 24 yrs and screwed around with a 39 yrs old nurse with 4 kids !!! I called her and and she denied it . I told he to stay away from my husband ! I told her I can call her husband and break her family up just like she tried doing to me . I never did call her husband but I NEVER respected my husband again. Stayed together few years but NEVER trusted one word from his mouth again. I wound up divorcing him and was a poor struggling single Mom for years ! He never paid any type of support either. It was hell and had a nervous break down completely shut off. Felt hopeless. I got through it and now he is 57 with 7 kids from 4 women ! These snakes dont change. It magnified it being pregnant or having kids. I got both ends dropping and picking my son up . Be real the only time they are sorry is WHEN THEY GET CAUGHT ! Then use the therapy card to buy time !!!! Go to therapy FIRST before you cheat . I think its pure BS when someone says they dont know why they cheated ! Looking back a wish I moved on quicker it not lost decades of quality mental time with my son. For the victims know it is NOT your fault you trusted a gaslighter and fake . You now know and deal with that part and move forward. You have to stop playing in your head the stuff they said to make you love them . And what they said to you to reel you in. Its VOIDED and stamped out by lies. Believe Who they are by their stinking actions. Start saving money and get that plan B in place !

[@standground8284]

Why don't women just keep it simple and divorce at the first instance of cheating instead of staying around and complaining about it? Since an apology and redemption is completely off the table.

[@net5635]

I wish you could've told the husband..

[@hillarybillary21]

You’re gross for blaming the other woman instead of your husband 😂. You’re a joke of a human like the rest of your kind.

[@hillarybillary21]

@@standground8284ITS TO KEEP A MAN IM THEIR BED AND FOR SOCIAL ACCEPTANCE. They’re weak women. It’s gross

[@AngelaMay66]

My husband was obsessed with his former fiances Facebook profile for a decade complete with friend requests and messages. My husband absolutely refuses to admit he did anything wrong. He will not call it cheating. It was since our daughter was 7 and she is in University now. I raised our daughter with a man who ignored me for his ex. I burned my wedding dress and all my memories with my husband feels like a lie. When we see a therapist together my husband uses the opportunity to degrade me with allegations that aren't true. He tells me its a defense mechanism to deflect blame off himself. The ex never spoke to my husband but she did tell me that she felt violated and afraid of all the attention. If I was younger I would recommend leaving, with the baby. My husband was doing this since we were dating and I'm thinking men don't change.

[@lousunny5682]

Ouch...that sounds incredibly painful. I’m so sorry that he has done that to you. I agree that it’s an defense mechanism, but there is more to that. There is a lack of accountability from him repeatedly. Were you able to voice how you felt he disrespected and disrespects your relationship when he does these things? Also, I would say one is never too old to leave a relationship for your own happiness. It’s not your fault for wanting or considering those things.

[@wendymalatios8907]

It’s never too late to be happy. 🌸

[@sarahb8147]

It's never too late to leave! Get a good lawyer. That guy sounds abusive.

[@starrjohnson1327]

Men can change but yours needs to go. He may or may not change. Why wait to see? You deserve to be happy

[@ronaldnichols9945]

You stayed and why?

[@meditatewithnae5182]

Trust can’t be restored.

[@LeonC0704]

I'll tell you what her love language is: Not being cheated on

[@elizabethlangheim7214]

Liars lie and Cheaters cheat. One year of marriage and this is the way he is behaving. You caught him this time, he’ll be smarter hiding it next time. You won’t be able to trust him ever. When he was asked why...dodge and weave...since he doesn’t know why he did it there is NO reason to think he will change his behavior. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s blaming it on his wife and just didn’t want to admit it.

[@altenberg-greifenstein]

There is always just one thing to set clear: did the cheater admit to it before the partner found out or did they hide it and the partner found out and then the cheater was saying sorry? Only in the first case, the relationship should be continued. Marriage is a legal contract, not some romantic bs for little kids. People are obviously not aware of it. You are breaking the contract, that's it. Teaching all those boys by example that it is normal to not honor a legal contract is horrible.

[@damemethief]

Cheaters never change. She needs to run.

[@JAYCEE-xm5dd]

That’s not true. I’m in a men’s group with guys committing to fidelity

[@matinaki1644]

​@@JAYCEE-xm5ddtill the next hot prospect available.

[@randyadams1312]

This guy is full of himself. He wants to continue cheating and is doing this to make his life for think he’s “a changed man”.

[@jones2277]

i really don't think blabbing about it to other couples will help anything. they will take sides and spread gossip.

[@blueseptember2174]

This man won't make it without the accountability that another man can provide. They need community for healing.

[@elizabetha8565]

I've never seen so many views and comments on a Delony video, I am glad people are discovering him :)

[@michellealjunaidi8471]

Sounds like Jack was looking at his relationship with the 60/40 rule. His partner gives him 60% of what he wants or needs and this other woman was giving him the 40% he thought he was lacking in his relationship. What people don't understand when they are sad over what they don't have. Is that other people can not provide 100% of what you need. You have to be able to help the relationship along. You can't say she or he doesn't do this for me. You have to look at what they do for you. You can not be so wrapped up in yourself that you can not see the other side.

[@ineedhoez]

He isn't whole. She should just be adding extra to his life.

[@ecclesiastesThreeVerseSeven]

Its called the 80 / 20 rule

[@Jaxoflife]

Married less than a year and she preggo!? He for the streets. Let him go sis!😑

[@emmarose6590]

@@dabd8175 gross

[@EmmaRonan]

You don’t realise the damage you can cause to someone’s mind, if you knew how much their heart is in your hands you would never ever hurt them, sadness and regret is one thing, but guilt, guilt is impossible to live with.

[@vaska1999]

Some people just don't care very much.

[@texasgina]

I would be out of that marriage faster than Mexican water through a first time tourist

[@alleykeosheyan4779]

Ooooh, nice simile! Stealing ;)

[@marytownsend6239]

He will never change because he has no love or respect for his wife. She should drag him through court! No one will want his broke behind then!

[@freebein]

Once a cheater (all together now) ALWAYS A CHEATER!

[@MrsEyerick]

Lol

[@appleforever6664]

It’s not cheating until you are caught. 😂

[@AngDiazx]

Lol

[@MariaInIowa]

"Someone in our marriage was a dirtbag. But that person went to therapy like 3 times so it's okay. Now the other person still won't trust him, I mean the first person, and that's really unfair and the first person thinks the second person should just get over it already."

[@Mila808g]

After watching full episodes and then accidentally re-watching the highlights... I must say that the editing/sound teams are FANTASTIC! LOL

[@amyteurlife9408]

both not getting their needs met, not just him. she tries and tries to connect and communicate with him, but he blames and ignores her. he goes elsewhere for connection.

[@whitneyw.7919]

This guy will cheat again. Cheating one year into a marriage signifies a character issue. Also, unpopular opinion, but contacting someone from your past with interest may mean that he didn't marry his soul mate. yes, I know the concept of soul mates is denied by some, but when you know then you know.

[@blueseptember2174]

A lot of men romanticize the past unfortunately. If that first woman was so special then he would have stayed with her. They always looking back instead of forward leading to their demise. A mature man know better and the grass is greener where you water it.

[@gabrielamartiniuc6322]

A faithful man who can find? Proverbs 20:6-7 If you lack loyalty , stay single ! If she hadn’t caught him he would have continued talking to that ex and then we would have met up with her. The issue is that he didn’t stop because it’s WRONG. He stopped for the time being because he was caught. Why did he reach out to an ex? Because he’s selfish and lacks loyalty. Enough with the psycho babble .

[@lorrainem8234]

He's probably afraid of impending fatherhood. If he just jumped in and was a man about fatherhood and marriage, they could have a good thing.

[@nidiavieyra8166]

Gotta give him credit for reaching out. But it’s tough to figure out why things happened and how/if they can be solved. Especially with a baby on the way. There is A LOT on the table that needs to be sorted. It’s like they say “putting back a broken mirror.” PLEASE don’t do it again!!! Best wishes for the three of you ❤️

[@byefelicia8632]

Its not tough. People just give in to the music going on in their mind.

[@redesignedlife777]

He just feels bad cuz he got caught. Give it a few years then he will try again.

[@purplelove3666]

Yeah lets give credit to a student for holding a pen lol.

[@couchtater4621]

Fascinating stuff? How can you cheat and not know why? He never answered the question and like all cheaters, it appears that he was well on his way to becoming a masterful liar.

[@ForTheLuvOfWolves]

I have a different perspective. I can’t tell how many times I caught my ex-husband doing this to me. Not once did he admit any type of guilt. He started blaming me for everything. He couldn’t understand at all why I withdrew from him and eventually didn’t care. I never trusted him again. It took me years to realize I didn’t love him anymore. This guy is at least trying. Maybe he’ll change and maybe he won’t.

[@catdancerskaleidoscopeofbo8496]

He is searching, searching, searching... for something else. You can hear it in his voice. He doesn't want to be with is wife any longer.

[@ericalashan1923]

I don't believe it was just on social media. He started out minimizing what he did.

[@truckingwithtobee]

If I were her, I would run far far away!!!! he’s doing this crap a year into their marriage!? Are you serious? He’ll continue to do it as long as she’s married to this idiot.

[@easyhealthtips-f5f]

I feel for this man's wife😢. My ex-husband seemed so nice and loving.He gave me lots of hugs, i love yous and cuddles that i suspected nothing until after a month into our marriage, i caught him emotionally cheating with a lady. Found out that he told her he loves her and planned to secretly marry her.. He even told the lady that he married me coz i was just available. All my love for my ex husband dropped that time and i couldn't look into his eyes anymore. I tried to stay and rebuild the trust but he kept on doing it..i was so broken..left after 2months...it's been a month after my separation. Thank God, Im getting there to be myself again..

[@vaska1999]

Good for you for leaving him. I hope you immediately filed for divorce, too.

[@Eric_Bassett]

Yeaaaaa bringing another couple in is a BAD idea. It’s THEIR business and bringing other people who know them in real life will backfire.

[@ominous450]

The why is simple. He wanted to have his cake and eat it too

[@anthonylozano8035]

It’s true.

[@angelseliteautodetailing]

What's wrong with that? When I get my wife she'll be my cake and I would eat to.. reaping the fruits of your labor.

[@seanmathis7971]

The why is definitely not that simple! It’s not always that analogy you say but much deeper. I have a feeling it has to do with insecurity within his relationship

[@whitneyw.7919]

Who doesn't want to have cake and eat it too? never understood that analogy

[@angelseliteautodetailing]

@@whitneyw.7919 unhealthy people apparantly

[@TheEquiss]

Run. Once a cheater always a cheater. Excuses. You didn’t “screw up”. You chose to do it. Dump and run cuZ they’ll do it again.

[@bodhisattva2348]

Shame on him.

[@MatthewHarrisLawPLLC]

Great show John! We miss you here in Lubbock. This topic is one that our clients struggle with on a daily basis. It's difficult to move forward after physical infidelity, as well as financial infidelity, but it isn't impossible!

[@AnaSanchez-n7i]

Not only is he a cheater but also a gaslighter. I really hope she left him and never looks back

[@fromthatday6334]

John always looks so disappointed in the thumbnail

[@AngelPerez-jm3yg]

That’s a good point 😂

[@jimmyboy1582]

Lol imagine him smiling with a title “the father tried to kill me”

[@zettaclark3213]

All this cheating is having a negative affect on how we view men and marriage.

[@Pooh1608]

He reached out because he wanted that old thing back. He wouldn't have admitted it unless he got caught.

[@BarbaraFlowers-wq1ru]

Why is it when you get married you've got to get your license as a detective it's like when you counsel people not to get in trouble and they go to prison now they want you to become a journalist writing them letters

[@GodessIsabelRaina]

Reaching out to an old girlfriend, getting her to have feelings for him only to screw her over. What a sociopathic Cad 🙄

[@CyeOutsider]

Cheaters and abusers often use therapy as a way to manipulate their partners into staying. Its pretending they're trying to fix their issues, but its just another con.

[@daveray5655]

Expert pro tip: don't cheat.

[@elmago1298]

unfort, learned this the hard way, but you are soooo right.

[@brookesmith1550]

No don’t tell others!!! It is none of their business and if they haven’t been through it then they really can’t help you if they have not been through it!!

[@dianagiles9467]

I wouldn’t be telling others..

[@Shay-yg7nm]

This caller sounds like he's trying to make it work but doesn't really want to be with his wife deep down. Dude.. Be honest with yourself. Life is too short to be unhappy

[@colleenpahl8965]

Too late.

[@sarahb8147]

Yeah the person I'm REALLY concerned for, the person whose happiness REALLY should matter to all of us, is the guy who cheated on his pregnant wife. Won't anyone think about him??

[@dghvdhfhhb6405]

@@sarahb8147 He’s a human being too

[@altenberg-greifenstein]

And that is why divorce and abortion were invented! Clear things up and never make the mistake again! Let humanity die out! xD

[@altenberg-greifenstein]

@@sarahb8147 No, because mentally healthy people do not put the abuser, predator, whatever as priority over everyone else.