The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: How to Raise Your Self-Esteem (Nathaniel Branden Book Review)

[@JulienHimself]

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[@dmednyte]

5 years later I'm back to this video . My life has changed so much , I now run my second group for women to help them raise their self esteem based on this book. The first women who completed the excersises are literally thriving ! Just here to say Thank you Julien , you sharing this has changed my life and in turn started this snowball effect where other women are now rising too ! What you do matters and I thought you should know !

[@JulienHimself]

That's amazing to hear! Congrats!!! 🙏

[@DreamBeatsBakery]

This book actually KILLED my approach anxiety. Literally eradicated it. And it all came back to one "conviction" that Branden put forward in this book. Here it goes: "People, whom I like and value, will usually like and value me in return." I started making this my mindset and I went to the biggest mal in my state that same day. I went to a high end clothing store and I shamelessly asked one of the ladies working there out for getting a drink, right in front of her coworkers and other customers. She respectfully declined and hesitantly said she had a boyfriend but I felt victorious and I walked away proud of myself. I'm only 22 and this happened a year ago and I know that most grown men shit themselves doing cold approach so yeah.. I wanted to share that and hopefully it will help some people. This book is the real deal.

[@21Strikerz]

Hey man, how has life been since then?

[@Jackson-e4k]

You’re 27 now. How are you?

[@tonyg3216]

I have been watching a lot of relationship and personal help coaches on youtube and by far this guy is the best.

[@Robb3348]

I spent a big phase of my intellectual life imbibing Branden's philosophy. He was Ayn Rand's lover and disciple. He was a total (total!) fanboy of Ayn Rand; he wrote a fan letter to Rand when he was still a teen and she was in her 40's. They met and became an intense mutual admiration society of two. She promoted him to chief disciple, and after a few years, more or less commanded him to become her lover, despite the fact that NB was by then married to another Rand disciple (a marriage she encouraged), and Rand was also married. In the Randian philosophy, one "should" be sexually attracted to the person who embodies your highest philosophical and intellectual values. There was about 25 years age difference between them. Rand insisted that the other spouses know about their affair, and that, because all four were rationally enlightened beings (IOW follower's of Rand's Objectivist philosophy), everyone should be fine with it. Unfortunately, the emotional fallout on the spouses was huge, and it precipitated a total disaster for all four of them. In 1968, Rand and Branden had a final, extremely bitter parting of the ways. Branden, undeterred even though now excommunicated from the Ayn Rand world, which had been his only social and professional world, moved to Los Angeles and opened a psychotherapy practice there. He became known as the "father of the self-esteem movement." His psychotherapy (and the philosophy of the Six Pillars book) is based solidly in Rand's philosophy, with a few modifications which he felt needed to be made. Rand was a believer in unalloyed rationality and absolute laissez faire free enterprise (capitalism). Branden saw himself as being faithful to essence of Rand's teachings, but Rand herself and her orthodox followers banned him for abandoning the more cult-like Rand-worship which characterizes the orthodox Objectivist movement to this day. Because he was a psychotherapist, he couldn't abide some of the unhealthier aspects of Rand's philosophy (and personal style, which was authoritarian and embittered, along with positive traits). The Six Pillars book, then, follows Rand's Objectivism in its main contours. It's an atheist (I use the term neutrally and descriptively) philosophy devoted to being as rational as possible, and making something of yourself through action and, as it were, stopping your whining lol. He makes room for feelings, though, in a way that Rand did not, again because he was a psychotherapist and was forced to acknowledge the importance of feelings in a way that Ayn Rand was not. One of the big distinguishing marks of NB's philosophy of self-esteem from the typical self-esteem platform, is his insistence that you have to EARN your self-esteem by ACTING in ways that earn your own self-respect. To NB, self-esteem is your reputation with yourself, and is your most precious possession. You have to act with integrity in order to respect yourself, and so he includes Integrity as one of the Six Pillars. I lived in LA in the early 2000's and met NB, since I was hoping to "spread the word" about this very book as a kind of gospel. I think NB was overall a very admirable man (he passed away a year or so ago). His memoirs were entitled "Judgment Day" or "My Years with Ayn Rand" (two separate editions). It's an excellent read. Branden was an excellent writer, and he reflects very honestly and openly on his relationship (intellectual and emotional) with Ayn Rand. If anyone wants to dialogue further about any of this, I'm open. There's much more to the story, and, simply because I was so involved with this guy's thinking for years, I can answer any fact-based questions people might have, and/or discuss the theoretical implications of his work. Cheers!

[@suppwizard]

+Robb Feldhaus Great fucking reply bro. This deserves muuuuch more likes. Super detailed: AWESOME

[@Robb3348]

+Tyrone McGinnon Hey man, I appreciate you taking the time to comment. Re-reading my post, I see that my admiration for *certain aspects* of Rand's philosophy didn't come through. Branden's philosophy is very good in many ways--it's good for getting a person off his ass and off his excuses for why he's not getting things done in his life. It's good for people who want to become less lemming-like, stop spending their time on Facebook, and accomplish something. But he leaves out the spiritual side of things and IMO the love piece (though not as ruthlessly as Rand did). Again I recommend his memoir ("My Years With Ayn Rand") for anyone who's taken with the Six Pillars book. But only if you're a person with a taste for good writing and a psychological self-awareness. Good luck to you bro!

[@maltewendt3724]

​@@Robb3348 Do you know the difference between self esteem and self love? I thought that you should love yourself "just because", so your confidence and sense of worth is constant and not based on some condition you made up for yourself.. Do you think it's fooling yourself to love yourself and think high of yourself when you dont act accordingly? I've read the six pillars of self esteem and can really resonate with it, but I dont get the paradox to self love. Would be very grateful for an answer! Greetings from Germany!

[@Robb3348]

+Inspiring Destinations Hey I just saw your reply now, two years after you posted it! Still, I appreciate what you said!! Thanks for the encouragement. What else are you into when it comes to self-development?

[@Robb3348]

+@@maltewendt3724 Hey how are you? Well, Branden in this book takes a very clear position. He says that the feel-good "every child is special just for existing" type of self-esteem is bogus. Branden says that self-esteem is "your reputation with yourself," and as such, must be earned, like any other reputation. It's earned by acting consciously, responsibly, with integrity, etc. (the Six Pillars) So he's not in favor of loving yourself "just because". On the other hand, if you are on an overall journey of increasing your practice of the six pillars, I'm sure he would have said to forgive yourself if you make mistakes. In other words, don't withdraw your self-love just because you're not doing the six pillars perfectly! So much for NB's opinion. In my view, NB is right insofar as holding oneself accountable has more integrity than a sloppy, gooey "I love myself no matter what," which gives a person an excuse for poor behavior. On the other hand, personally I believe that a human being has inherent dignity and has the right to be respected, even if that human being is oneself! Even an irresponsible, unconscious, unethical person has the right to human respect, and moreover, NEEDS that respect to even have a shot at growing. So my view would be, love yourself no matter what, AND challenge yourself to the kinds of behavior which will earn further respect for yourself. What do you think?

[@MarioTomicOfficial]

One of my favorite books! Awesome breakdown of the lessons. Reminded me that I should re-read the book again

[@budsyremo]

Mario Tomic do these books help ?

[@jackyneves9522]

@@budsyremo definitely I’m currently reading this book and not even halfway through it and I’m already seeing myself and the world from a whole different perspective It’s definitely perfect for people who struggle with loving themselves and reading it from a perspective of a therapist it saves you time and money that you usually spend on a therapist and you have one in handy that you can take everywhere with you and can enjoy it from the comfort of your home I’m loving it already it helped me a lot and I’m reading it everywhere I can🤗 A must read🙌🏾💪🏾

[@raphandlife]

I IGNORED this video a year ago as I was looking for the "techniques" to be more social. Boy! that was my BIGGEST MISTAKE. Since I began writing journals to determine why I get stifled around people, especially those I wanted to impress, I realised the problem stemmed from within me. As much as I liked to deny it in my self-talk, my self-esteem was low. And so in this video, the practice of self-acceptance resonated with me. My biggest takeaway is "to be on your own side" because when the shit hits the fan, I become my own adversary. I make things worse for myself. But not anymore :), now that I am aware of it. I will definitely get the book. I'm sure there's more to learn as this video serves mainly as an overview.

[@dmednyte]

Right there with you with the epiphanies .. I've made the mistake of starting this book in starbucks on a Friday eve in central London. Kept bawling my eyes out, unable to stop highlighting or stop myself from reading further, lol got a few weird looks and a few ''are you okay's?'' but fuck it, this book is a true gem and I just wanna say a massive THANK YOU for taking your time and sharing this and keep up the fab work, clearly this is your calling *fist pump*

[@JulienHimself]

+Nora M Haha, that's awesome! Thanks Nora! :)

[@hansolzy]

Read this book last year. Opened my eyes to a new level. Made me think of some friends in my life and also myself of why we act certain ways and why we are how we are. I actually bought a copy for my friend that I thought could need it and he loved it as well. One of my favs next to "think and grow rich" by Napleon Hill so far. My memory isn't the best so I tend to forget some things, so videos like this are awesome. I definitely need to read more and re-read a lot of my books this year.

[@EdwardDorr]

It's the greatest book ever. It will heal you. I've reread many times.

[@ilovewisdom6352]

Amazing book... One of the parts that I found most interesting is when he compares self-esteem to the immune system: "For this reason I have come to think of positive self-esteem as, in effect, the immune system of consciousness, providing resistance, strength, and a capacity for regeneration. Just as a healthy immune system does not guarantee that one will never become ill, but makes one less vulnerable to disease and better equipped to overcome it, so a healthy self-esteem does not guarantee that one will never suffer anxiety or depression in the face of life's difficulties, but makes one less susceptible and better equipped to cope, rebound, and transcend. High-self-esteem people can surely be knocked down by an excess of troubles, but they are quicker to pick themselves up again." By the way Julien the way you hustle is inspiring to everyone, especially, for those like me that are building something from scratch... Keep it up!

[@stuvlog]

This is going to be the next book as soon as I finish Letting Go, this one sounds so interesting! Bring back these book reviews please! Thanks for all you do, it has such an impact on me, and we’re just talking the free content for now! You put so much good free stuff out there that I can’t even imagine how good Transformation Mastery must be! 🙏🏻

[@artemr.3092]

Julien, I want to thank you for The Shift. It really changed my life. May the force be with you!

[@karimsalhani]

Wish ALL THE WORLD would read this book. So much pain and evil is created from not being aware of these concepts, especially the 1st pillar.

[@iOmarYGY]

Hello Mr. Julien, Id like to say that I think you are a very talented and skilled speaker, the way you organize your ideas reaches me on a high level. Thanks for your effort and continue ❤️

[@markisaac7970]

Julien is WRONG on self responsibility - "no one is coming to save you" - well he's just come - it's Julien, RSD and this video! Joking aside aside though - awesome resource, thanks Julien!

[@Daffmeister187]

You had to find this channel first though ^^

[@markisaac7970]

Serendipously found RSD years ago. Guess I'm lucky

[@baberuthny3]

Mark Isaac Yes but Julien came to tell you that noone is coming.

[@THConnoisseur]

Love what you are doing, simple concept but beneficial to all

[@Logical_Motivation]

I agree with you. He's sharing great tips.

[@WeedTacos]

This is the type of advice most family and friends lack the knowledge to give to someone struggling everyday with low self-esteem when they are in high school or an adult after leaving college. Unarticulated advice leads to more of the same problems that caused them to have more low-self-esteem and toxic relationships.

[@yo6285]

I've read this book and was looking for reviews or personal recaps and this was the best one I saw. It doesn't generalize or give vague interpretations of his basic points, but says them and adds meaning. Thanks!

[@bi2u4787]

One of the best book written on Self-esteem. Solid foundation for self realization .This book never gets old. Nice Video Julien!!!

[@sloth9853]

Yo yo yo *Julien*, So I just bought your product SHIFT. Listening to one video day by day, taking notes. Taking it 100% seriously. This video helps a lot too! Thank you so much man, you are really changing my life. Best mentor I ever had.

[@mistahac]

great video man. to be honest I used to you judge you off your pickup videos but you've just won over a new fan and subscriber!

[@JulienHimself]

+Aceezy Thank you! :)

[@juanarcila2256]

Thank you for this video, Julien. You have a talent for truly explaining concepts in ways that truly resonate with us and that we can integrate within ourselves. Throughout your videos and the books we have read, I found so many correlations and overlapping concepts. For example, the practice of self-acceptance and non-resistance to your emotions and thoughts is the core tenant of Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now, and the questions we ask ourselves in the practice of living purposefully is very similar to the scientific method in the sense that its so systematic. Every time I watch one of your videos, I'm either gaining a new epiphany or reinforcing ones that I have before, which is essential in making it truly intuitive to the point that it becomes second nature. Thank you, Julien! I hope to one day meet you in one of your tours :)

[@jimyhustle]

thanks again self esteem is definitely something i have to improve any information about the big new project you're working on ?

[@kirilstrezov7439]

"Do you have time to speak about our lord and savior, Julien?" Dude, I love you #nohomo. Almost lost it today so I came to continue watching your playlist and am feeling far better now. Respect.

[@Music-ho8ob]

You’re unbelievable how you summarised this! I keep playing it! I’m making notes from this video now! I have thumbed through the book. I will read it soon. An excellent summary!

[@ericwolfe666]

I want to read it, but I'm glad I learned a lot just from this video.

[@JulienHimself]

It's an amazing book! 👌

[@jonjon11882]

Julien this new channel is so fucking gold. Thank you for deciding to do more of this self development stuff you have cultivated a great fucking talent here. Your PUA stuff you are obviously very good at but you are really just killing it right now with this stuff.

[@MoeAbbassi]

This book is PURE gold! love the review

[@Logical_Motivation]

Agree!!

[@Odessagurl]

Read the book a few years back, thanks for the great review & refresher :)

[@dotty9501]

Thank you Julien! You have helped me tremendously.

[@baberuthny3]

A healthy self-esteem and ego is necessary to live a happy life and create the life of our dreams. Brandon mentions some people take the spiritual path and decide to renounce their egos but they can't give something up that they never had in the first place.

[@dennystoriginal]

Happy new year! and remember 2016 won't change anything unless you do!

[@jameshendershott2170]

Julien, Thanks for this book review. I'm a frikking baller artist. You're helping me to move forward in my career.

[@saughs]

I really need to read this. I've been wanting to for awhile now...thanks Julien

[@Logical_Motivation]

I think I might Pick up a copy of this book too. It looks really good.

[@christian3583]

These book explanations are really the BEST !!! There’s so much to learn it’s confusing. I’ve really got to buy transformation mastery some day

[@lt90110]

Thank you for another great book review. Very useful

[@Logical_Motivation]

I agree with you!

[@MusixPro4u]

Still my favorite book til this day.

[@drewkantos]

Dude! The book reviews are great. Way to tap into this segment of the youtube community!

[@SpideerMaxi]

Six pillars of self esteem is the beste book i read so far. Great review Julien! Keep Going!

[@henryfeng9151]

Given what has transpired from recent years with RSD, Julien I think it may be a good time to re-read this book, and more importantly do the awareness building sentence completion exercises.

[@ThingsILikke]

Thank you Julien this was great! This was quite a long book and I drifted about when I tried to read it. This saved me a lot of time thanks brother!

[@jehriasean6379]

Really good video! I'm gonna buy the book.

[@afrasiab1992]

thanks for these book reviews Julien. I am reading the radical honesty right now because your last video. this is the next book that I am gonna read. :)

[@TheSeoulPurpose]

Julien, I am a HUGE fan of your Value Videos! Making Value Videos has been something that I've been wanting to do for a while, made a few, never released them. Interestingly enough, your videos are helping overcome the mental setbacks that I've been having, so a million thanks to you! I have one question, how do you read the books that you cover? From beginning to end? Or skim for the golden nuggets to avoid filler chapters (Tai Lopez's method)?

[@Mustard7535]

Julien, you had amazing lighting during this video! Loved it.

[@MikeyCollie1990]

Reading this book at the moment. Very insightful.

[@keithdmello]

Love these detailed reviews. Able to use it as an audiobook.

[@johnathonsantacruz5554]

Amazing book review, just got my copy in the mail.Thx a lot

[@davidcort2214]

i love it man that book was great.

[@Unlucky13ification]

About to go back to Uni soon. Do you recommend I read these books while studying for my major?

[@marcogauch]

Have to read this book... I think I got low self esteem... 😧 so change it! :)

[@Logical_Motivation]

I think I might grab a copy of it!

[@Simmuh2]

Yeah man

[@ZendesignStore]

Really Awesome video Julien. You are providing real value :)

[@rafaeltesfaye2905]

hey Julien, when was the first time you cracked open the 6 Pillers?

[@lianeber]

Reading this book now and getting a lot of awesome stuff from it!!! Here is a typical negative youtube comment btw: i get the feeling that you have the same body language coach as hillary clinton: "just move your hands like crazy and you will seem genuine!"

[@hughjaybeats4126]

I love your book reviews Julien..! 💯🙂✌️💧🔌

[@2011work2008]

Was a little distracted with your cuteness.. Awesome video.. So much to learn.. Thank you for the help.. 😊

[@fitnessjunkie5823]

Are you able to give us access to your notes to download? Those would be extremely helpful!

[@solarexclipse8754]

Thk YOU 💗 Amazing, very interesting.

[@martin984]

"...with unconflicted self-esteem JOY is our motor, not FEAR" - how can you rework your 'gun to the head' motivation to be aligned with this?

[@worldtraveller4080]

Great content and presentation, Julien! Keep up the good work :)

[@VincentLegent]

excellent video thanks

[@LuckyMetal]

Interesting video! Good job Julien!

[@walbertiusmorerius1245]

Thanks my friend!

[@Slaytounge]

This was better than I expected.

[@noservice814]

Thanks for the notes!

[@nigelturner8514]

awsome book review!! you go into epic detail I can't wait to see video's on dating advice!

[@Logical_Motivation]

Yes! Details were great and deep.

[@rzilla1481]

hey Julien, thank you for the post.

[@fiddleferme]

Good info: THANKS! The presentation is a bit tense; could be more relaxed for audience. Cheers.

[@books4abetterlife83]

Adding this to my list and my fb page once I'm done

[@th220]

what were you thinking keeping that almost empty glass of pond algae water in frame?

[@xbrycemcx]

Haha this guy is gonna whip his head right off his shoulders. Love it. Love these book reviews too,

[@creator2149]

This sounds like a treatment for narcissistic personality disorder but, it does give some great tips for other people who aren't quite as obsessive as narcissists. We could all use a little self esteem boost, no matter who we are. However, you will never find a narcissist watching these self help videos. Is there one for non-narcissists?

[@masonholt651]

That's twice now that I bought the same book only days before the review.

[@simdhaliwal4260]

+Mason Holt Is that because he tells you one week in advance the book he is going to review?

[@masonholt651]

No :)

[@awaworldart]

Merci Julien!!!!💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

[@vincentd333]

Hey Julien, this video really made me my question my current self-image.. Thank you man! have you considered, making these shownotes available to your viewers for a little commission or for sharing it? Just a thought, Peace Vincent

[@neverlastingworld]

hey julien, you should put affiliate links for these books in your description, because I want to buy this book. lol

[@grzegorznowotarski7693]

hey Julien have you done exercises at the end if the book? (these questiins). Are they very beneficial? Thanks!

[@OrgilB]

Julien is too high on life that he his energy can't be contained.

[@Logical_Motivation]

Very good video. I like this channel.

[@invan99999]

Great work thank you

[@33brizzy]

Great video this youtube channel will blow up in no time thanks for it Julien Blanc

[@Logical_Motivation]

I agree!

[@malikattar9484]

Great video

[@mexicankid67]

Great Content Julien

[@markgaming650]

I read this book! its good!

[@Hussainzidane]

I miss watching your videos

[@italoguilherme694]

i love this guy man!Um salve do Brasiĺ Julien.

[@stratosfirebird]

thank you my friend

[@yinmonmon380]

Thank you

[@kimorady8791]

ok ... Julien how u combine all the books together like '' the power of now, letting go, the six pillars of self-esteem'' when u feel that some info. in the books contradict each other?

[@Skinkie22]

i find this book very hard to read. granted i have the english version and that is not my native language. but damn. the way he puts his sentences together and such are a heavy read. but i am going to finish the book. and hopefully can take some great lessons out of it

[@sebaspinelli1988]

Getting Fit Julien!

[@sapien190]

It is fairly weird tothink that no one is coming to save me. I am traveling on my own in unnown english speaking countries. Staying in hostel, I always have to go and talk to people. I go for The ones who aren't on their phones, trust me they are rare. But here is the point, the fact that I exist and talk to people is embodying the idea that some people are there to save others from boredom. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. The hardest thing traveling on your own is meeting cool people and letting them go. I often feel abandonned and find it very hard not taking it personal when some people totaly ignore me because they fairly enough don't like me. # spleen of the day

[@DrevichMusic]

+Bastien Chevalier-Héroux I can sympathize.

[@viniciusgandine6686]

Hey man, I'm from brazil and I'm really into PUA, that's changed my life in some many levels that I can't explain. The thing is I can't find that book by nathaniel branden in any place. Would you have the pdf one to download it? Thanks!

[@nasherbuenafe253]

vinicius gandine order it online, invest in youtself

[@thatslife9816]

YES FINALLY!

[@ns2jz]

Sweet. It's next to my bed already.

[@victoriannecastle]

I just realized late the background isn't a black wall or a curtain, but is actually a city. Okay, got to work on my self esteem now because I'm sure I piled up negative ones. I need to email that guy and start with a hardcore training, but oh, it's already late, gotta do it tomorrow then.

[@batualtnok7076]

By the way i have just figured it out that what is the flying object in 14:20 to 14:37 ?

[@anthonyvanderpool6803]

Julien's energy is so fucking sick!!

[@fredjones74]

waitin for you to smack that glass off the desk with all that "hand talking" lololol