how to raise your self esteem, confidence & standards 👑 | high value traits

[@lavendaire]

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[@shrinivassoni6147]

Such a valuable video! I don’t often promote books, but the book women’s magic truths on borlest is an exception. It’s packed with insights on wealth and self-care that are not widely known. All the best to everyone

[@lavendaire]

After reading & replying to some comments, I'm now aware of the negative connotations behind this term ("high value woman") and I apologize for not being aware prior. This is clearly a video about SELF WORTH - all humans are inherently worthy, but not everyone treats themselves that way. This video is meant to help people see & believe in their inherent value. Regarding this term, I had seen many female creators use this term from this positive self worth "queen energy" angle and I hoped to share my take on it. I'm curious if you were to suggest retitling the video to anything else, what would it be? "how to have confident, queen energy?" etc

[@annaziser3549]

Confident, self-assured, independent? Any descriptor that is more direct about your intention would work. "How to know your worth" in the title is perfectly fine

[@kawaiijutsu]

How to be confident. Though I see you’ve changed it to be “high value person”, so you’re still missing a huge piece of WHY incels, alpha males, etc use this term - because it allows them to ALSO clarify what they think is “low value”, and who it’s ok for their audience to trash. When you use the term “high value”, you automatically introduce a dichotomy with a “low value”. Please, PLEASE put in some research to this topic. I think (with some research and introspection) you could actually make an interesting video about how to not fall for this type of toxic thinking, the problems with that kind of philosophy and worldview, etc.

[@lavendaire]

@@kawaiijutsu i didn't change that part of the title, it was originally there as the subtitle. I was considering whether to update it to "high value traits" or something else. If you watch the video, I did introduce the dichotomy of high vs low value thinking (in terms of viewing the self), so I do want the title to still reflect the content of the video. Otherwise, ppl who only see the new title will complain about a misleading title. Imagine if you clicked on "how to be confident" and then I start talking about high value women & high vs low value - it might throw you off and offend you more.

[@kawaiijutsu]

@@lavendaire I have watched some of the video, though honestly, that terminology and people who subscribe to that worldview are triggering to me and I couldn’t complete it. I think I can see what you mean, but if that’s really the case, you might consider taking this video down for a bit and rewriting. Talking about high value people, women or men, is a completely co-opted term, no matter what you may have been trying to say.

[@lavendaire]

It’s okay if this video isn’t for you then. I still stand by everything that I shared in this video.

[@angelagrimes8237]

I am still recovering, rediscovering who I was, am and who I can possibly be. So I would say from 1-10, I am at the 7. I have made progress. Some may say why bother you are 68 yrs old, you life is nearly done. But it’s not done and whilst so many friends have passed on, I am still here with work to do. So thank you for your words and sharing ideas of growth and possibilities! Thank you Aileen!

[@SyriusOLsh]

68 is not nearly done yet, you have so much more life to do!

[@maheswaricp666]

Love yourself the way you are... Love your life the way it is.. Then everything will turn positive..

[@jno995]

@@maheswaricp666 You’re right that you should always love yourself. But, never stop improving yourself. Do not grow stagnant on your journey of self love and improvement. After all, becoming your best self is showing love to yourself and showing that you are worthy of a truly blessed life.

[@jno995]

Absolutely it’s very important to treat yourself and knowing you deserve the best and do the inner work to heal. It’s also important to have unconditional love and forgiveness for others. That also makes you high value.

[@shalini14]

It's been 2 years, I am in my healing journey and I can say I am on number 7 on High vibe Journey ❤

[@TheFifthWorld22]

🎶🪷🎶

[@youknowwho4335]

Everyone has their own definition for certain term. And here Aileen was just ‘redefining’ the term based on how she saw it, and how she wanted this term to be seen. I’m grateful she brought up this topic and gave/introduced new & more empowering meaning to it

[@carlozcali]

I feel that I'm a high value person, when I see how inspiring I am to people who surrounds me, and I've seen how they take my example to do changes into their lives or take my opinion as something important.

[@Mar-ME-s3h]

We know your intentions are ALWAYS full of compassion & meant to uplift every single person watching. Your mission of inclusivity is evident throughout your many years producing content. Your body of work speaks for you in a brilliant way. Thanks for all you do 🌸🌞

[@CappCreative]

As somebody who’s probably not your target demographic, I really gain a good bit from your content and have made a lot of changes to my life because of it. 🤙🏼 Keep doing what you’re doing!

[@tamiewert808]

I think when we consider ourselves high quality people, we treat ourselves properly, we treat others better, and we also teach others how to treat us! I love this ideology!!

[@agnespaulineking]

I love that more and more people are talking about this topic!! I know there is quite a big division between people who agree with this message and people who don't but I really feel that, deep down, THIS is the message we all need to hear. As in, treating ourselves with respect, building up our boundaries and working on our confidence, despite what others might think of our "selfish" self improvement journey. More often than not, I get stuck in self doubt and procrastination when I want to work on something I care about (like making and posting videos, writing my book, creating something new from zero etc) because of some fears and overthinking, and I find that when I journal to bring myself back to the state confidence, I feel much better 🥰 love that you're touching on people pleasing too because it's so sad to see how many people put themselves last 🥺 I feel like we've all had enough of giving so much without receiving anything back and now it's time for us to think about ourselves and I'm all here for it 💛

[@coumbandiii]

Aileen is saying that everyone is high value and has the ability to cultivate high self esteem!🌟 Lavendaires old title should not bother you if you understand her heart and true intentions. Through all of her videos she has advocated how everyone has the ability to cultivate self-love and self-confidence and does not exclude anyone. Some people use the term “high value” to state that your worth comes from the things you have or how your better than others. But Aileen is switching this perspective and showing that everyone has the ability to have high self worth and it comes from the internal. but i loved this shift that you dont need money or status to have worth. She also said it doesnt mean your beneath anyone or better then anyone. High value is not depending on others its how much you value yourself and just means high self esteem. These are all positive traits to increase your self love. Lavendaires channel is alll about showing others how they have the ability to create a life they love despite their circumstances and that we all can cultivate high self esteem💜

[@lavendaire]

thank you ❤️❤️

[@brit331]

It’s not her title that is the problem, unfortunately it’s the groups that have taken that term and made it have so many other deeper problems. I don’t think anyone is coming for Aileen but if she doesn’t want to attract those groups that’s why people are asking her to change the title.

[@coumbandiii]

@@brit331 i think it would be pretty awesome if those groups clicked on this video for an ego boost but got a video on self love and self worth instead. She is switching the narrative and transforming the mindset into a healthier outlook! Maybe this video can be a wakening call

[@LUGG824]

Preach, Lavendaire is the sweetest kindest soul. Her videos and meditations have been really helping me get closer to my truest self over the last couple years!

[@Journal-freak]

I'm on a 7 or maybe at 8 because I sometimes do cry and feel like I'm not doing enough but when I look back I see that it's okay sometimes you are not always able to do everything and you don't have to be guilty about it!❤

[@miharu9794]

My journey about being a high-value person started when i realized i could be anything i wanted to ==> I started believing in myself ==> i started seeing myself as worthy of good things ==> i naturally fell into this mindset of "high-value" and behaved accordingly ♥ I believe it all starts with acting as the person you wanna be and everything else falls into place

[@tessdehert5839]

I'm 80% of where I want to be. I need to heal my anxious attachment. I'm starting with not asking for validation anymore and reminding myself that I can trust my partner

[@tidseargram]

Be proud and confident in this video Aileen, because it’s an important message and I learned a lot. Often people are so quick to do good things for others, but not for themselves. I like the concept of considering a ‘high value’ and ‘low value’ object and how you treat them. I really needed this video right now. ❤

[@angel_captures]

Sending my deep appreciation to you for breaking down the qualities of a high-value woman.

[@panoslifeinspirator]

Hello Aileen! First of all I want to say I'm a guy but when you explained that you only talked about high value women because most of your community is women I stayed to watch the video till it's end and I can say it really worth it! I'm watching your videos the last 3-4 months and every time I watch one of your videos, btw my favorites are your affirmation tapes and meditation videos I feel very motivated and inspired, it's the aura you have, your kindness, your empathy, you really help me😊😊💖💖 Currently I would rate my self worth at 6, which is quite an upgrade for me. Thank you so much!!!

[@danluna7916]

Thank for being inclusive in mentioning guys. I have always appreciated the content. When you mention about an individuals inner worth, it reminds me of Eckhart Tolle's Stillness Speaks as similar content is brought up in his book. I just finished reading that one so it is still fresh in my mind. The part about prioritizing yourself first is something I've learned in the past year, some may look at it like selfishness, but that's not the case. I have an example given to me about this: If you were in a boat and it had holes in it, no matter how much you want to help someone else, you know that boat is only going to sink faster if you both got in the boat, which would help no one. In order to fix the problem, you need to take care of yourself/your boat, fix the hole first before you help someone else get onboard. Another words you can't take care of someone else if you can't take care of yourself first. Thank you for putting this content out in the world. It really means a lot.

[@lavendaire]

Yes! Thanks for sharing. I love Eckhart Tolle’s work but haven’t gotten to read Stillness Speaks. 🙏🏼 sending love

[@mariamnader2016]

I've got tears while listening to ur words, i knew i do not treat myself like high value person, i hope i became more kind to myself nd respect myself more, thank u Aileen♥️

[@janeb3024]

My high value vomes from four traits: courtesy to others, co-operation with others, respect for self and others, and responsibility for my own actions. What goes around comes around.

[@alildiary7889]

I appreciate your perspective that being a high value person is about how you express your energy. Energy is accessible to everyone, and you can always choose to embody a new energy. Every human being is inherently valuable and worthy, but we all go through ups and downs in life, so inevitably we are going to need reminders to recognise this within ourselves. One way to recognise this is to be mindfully aware of our energy. This is a great reminder for everyone from all walks of life to know that at the end of the day, we are all valuable, regardless of internal/external circumstances. Anyways, one of my takeaways from this is that to embody a person of value (your greatest potential self), you need to see value in others. Also, I understand that you have used the term high value as a means to help others continuously become a better version of themselves. However, I can also see how using the words high value can unintentionally cause a duality/division in thought about people being of high/low value. When people are conditioned to think this way, we may then subconsciously classify or treat people as being more/less valuable than others. It’s food for thought. Considering this is a great revolution in our thinking. Thank you for expressing your thoughts and standing by what you believe in.

[@kamea4023]

I made enemies because of my demand for boundaries and respect. It’s hard but I have to.

[@kiskakuznetsova503]

And I love those ppl who are so thin-skinned because they take themselves out. You don't have to do any work trying to figure out whether they're truly supportive or not.

[@Barbie_2024]

Same

[@ednahall5606]

Thank you for sharing this information. Very refreshing and helpful.

[@milanimark-od1cd]

Yup I'm feeling like really pple will hate me but I want to continue with setting my own boundaries . Anyone of you guys have some advices plz!

[@Jewelslovcy]

Just keep doing what is best for you

[@treetea]

I’m not sure if you are aware, but high value women and a similar term high value men are phrases used in communities (incel, tradwife, manosphere etc) that actually use them to leverage subservience out of women…I can’t really explain the nuisance in a short comment, but basically the definition of high value used for women in these contexts are more along the lines of shaming “low value” women who have high body counts or are not skinny or not preforming womanhood correctly. I can see if I can find some resources for learning about this, but I can’t think of anything off the top of my head.

[@abbytrawicki5855]

you're so right. the subtext behind these terms is really not pleasant. I enjoy lavendaire videos, but this was a miss for me.

[@RenaissanceRockerBoy]

Was gonna say this... unfortunately these terms enter the common social media sphere and it's difficult to explain to people who don't know exactly how harmful the origins of these are.

[@trixjoyce]

@@abbytrawicki5855 Same for me. I usually like her content, but this one... nope.

[@ritikaadhikari4202]

Q

[@lavendaire]

thanks for sharing that.. i wasn't aware & I apologize. I've just seen many female creators post about this topic and I've seen both "high value women / men" content trending. honestly this is a video about self worth and I wanted to try a new angle. if you watch the video, it has nothing to do with dating or those negative connotations.

[@ianwinter90]

Right now, I don't have a number, but I am climbing, till I reach my highest ground. Thank you! I love your videos!

[@akankshasinha8979]

Wake up babe...the queen of KZbin just posted!

[@prathibhadias6905]

I value myself to the fullest. So my rating is 10. The best quality mentioned in the video is following big goals. Love this content. Thanks 🧡

[@lavendaire]

Love it!! 👏👏

[@margarettownsley9500]

Everyone one should be kind to themselves be the best you can be but we must be walking in humility and kindness because it’s a hard fall when you slip from the top of the ladder

[@get_inspiredbysg]

I'm new to your channel and I'm so happy I joined you today. You gave me a lot to think about and I've had many challenges in my life that caused me to lose myself. At this moment I would say I feel my self worth 5 - 6 and I know I deserve better. I'm ready to make a change and get back power over my life!

[@lavendaire]

welcome love 🩷 so happy to have you here! thank you so much for sharing

[@shreeyaa121]

On a scale of 1 to 10, I am on 7 and I know that I am in the process of realising my own self-worth and feeling like a high value woman from the core of my heart. Thank you so much for your wonderful videos. They are truly helpful, insightful and inspiring ❤️❤️

[@arestaquilla]

I rewatch this vid bcs I need this energy these days, I wanna feel energize and hopeful. thank u for this amazing video aileen!

[@tatianamolteni7417]

I am starting my journey on this topic and feeling more peace within myself thanks to that

[@LUGG824]

Thank you for this video! Focusing on my self-worth has been falling to the wayside recently amongst a busy final uni term! But this was a timely reminder that my self-worth should not be put on hold, it is ever present and always should be a priority ❤ gonna do some journalling on this sunny morning :)

[@milenagonzalez4470]

Thank you so much for this video. I really needed to hear all of this. I have been struggling with feeling worthy. This helped immensely. Thank you again.

[@miharu9794]

I think you did a great job explaining the feeling and the meaning of the words "high-value" as a lot of videos on yt just explain it in terms of women just being picky about men or something. There should be more videos about how to be a high value person! That's what everybody should aim to be, i think

[@miau2451]

I think I am a 8/10 high value woman and thanks to your videos this only keeps rising and rising, thank u so much ❤

[@gōl-z3x2x]

You deserve to be in a group of all the best people in the world!

[@shamshadsora6360]

I can see you thriving in this era of your life 😘🤗 it's inspiring 💜💜💜lavi love here.

[@aqsi19]

I'm not sure if I think this title is not accurate. I didn't value myself before, so it's spot on. Now I do value myself ❤🙏🏽 This video made my day. Its the second time in listening to start my day. Thank u so much 😊

[@shondataylor2091]

I absolutely love the video. I found the tips to be very helpful and what we all need to live by. I think a lot of people that are responding negatively and/or are offended are being overly sensitive due to how the term "high value" was/is used by other people (not diminishing your feelings). I think their could have been a better term used, but I recognize the sentiment and know your heart is in the right place. I appreciate your content and have learned a great deal from you. Continue giving quality content and you are still Zen. GOD bless.

[@dharierodrigo]

Here's the secret: you don't just teach it, you embody it. Your strength, kindness, and passion shine through everything you do. You inspire us to be the best versions of ourselves, and that's the ultimate sign of a high-value woman. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and light with the world!💫🌸

[@lavendaire]

💗💗

[@afianifauziah4945]

Hi Aileen, you just snap me out of it again, i think i am in 5, i still have long way to go to achieve my dreams. Hope i can reach them in the right time, i believe it will come ❤️❤️ Thanks for the videos! And i just want to say, you may have those negative responses bout this video, but i hope you take it as positive feedback to improve if you feel it is wrong And one thing, i know you just try to encourage us, to support people with your ways ❤️❤️

[@blackpinkinyourarea9155]

thank you very much! i feel the positive energy which you spread to everyone. It heps me a lot to overcome this tough situation.🥰

[@elenavaipan]

I'm at 8 right now. Still need to do some work with myself and for myself. Thank you for your work here on KZbin! You are awesome! 💖

[@lani1628]

You're absolutely a queen like an actual queen you're just so aesthetic and wonderful and amazing💖✨🫶

[@GlowLotus444]

Loved this pointers!! Learning about self care and putting myself first in my mid 20’s has been a game changer for me💕😌 !

[@margaritabarrion7223]

Something about your hair color and skin tone suits you very well. You look so pretty Aileen.☺️🤗

[@nathaliacota1248]

This is one I will watch and listen to on repeat! One of your BEST. Thank you Aileen. **Obviously** high value in the context of this video equates to high self worth.

[@KikiSoccer50]

This has been so helpful Aileen! Thank you so Much for the message ❤

[@justatinyhalfling]

The sentiment I get, but the terminology shocks me! Humans are not a comodity, we cannot be "high value" or "low value". We are human, and worthy, every single one. The only trait a person needs to a valuable is to be human.

[@DrMeikoHayakawa]

This is it.

[@emilypossom]

Did you even watch the video she wasn't talking like that at all, she only uses the term because of social media she legit said so in the beginning of the video.

[@RenaissanceRockerBoy]

@@emilypossomBut it's only a social media term bc it originated from far-right incel spaces. That's concerning. Casually using it without doing research is not good.

[@trixjoyce]

Yes! I was thinking about this the entire video (yes I watched it) and was actually glad when I saw your comment on this. Very much of what she says seems out of reach for me as an autistic woman as well. But I hope everyone who's watching feels like they are valuable...

[@trixjoyce]

@@Lokjhsdi it’s not about what she’s saying it’s more the terminology that hurts because it comes from incel and redpill roots. If she made the video and was using more general words and not these specific terms I wouldn’t mind as much. Words have an impact. With that said, I don’t think Aileen is aware of what these words have their roots from…

[@kalyani2024]

Thank you so much dear dii 🙏 🥰💜😘 for this wonderful, awesome Content, I am from India nice to see you 🤗

[@monikakapoor8682]

I love u so much lavendaire. This is something I really needed ❤❤

[@she_was_here]

Amazing video as always Aileen! God bless you ❤❤❤

[@BillyWhaler]

Energy level was completely different (up) than past couple months. Hope it is a good season ahead.

[@Trustyourself2001]

How were you able to explain me to the top level 😂💞💞. You are a very valuable and talented person! Namaste 🙏🏾

[@chandypierre]

This just gave me so much energy thank you!

[@Purplescorpioncreations]

You speak so good. All the tips are valuable. Thanks.

[@lavendaire]

thank you love 💝

[@yamiletsoler3464]

This is a good insight and a very nice way of unraveling your perspective and counsel. Thanks for sharing 😊

[@raniamohammed1437]

Amazing video to help people who think so little of them self to be better , you explained it very well 💕

[@SyriusOLsh]

Off the top of my head, feels like a 7! I like the analogy of trash vs high value, and it's interesting to reflect and meditate on the qualities and energy of both. What are the inner narratives that gets some people think and behave that they are trash, and the inner narrative that gets others to behave like they're treasure.

[@muskansoni581]

In my point of view, i believe to be on number 4 of being high value women . However, i strongly believe that i will develop those traits .In my opinion I liked your point of being confident based on inner worth. 💮

[@Jennian_M]

Needed this reminder today. Thanks!

[@Sutsbeee]

Don't worry about the negative comments you're getting girl 💚 I have seen the whole video and i can say anyways that every single word came from your mouth worth listening to :)

[@AmitkumarKumar-ww5ef]

Amazing content in this video! I rarely suggest anything in comments, but the book women’s magic truths on borlest is a game-changer. It provides deep knowledge on wealth and self-care that can really make a difference. Take care, everyone

[@mikkaellamayol8542]

you are glowing girl! Been a secret fan since 2020♥️

[@lavendaire]

thank you so much MikkaElla for being on this journey with me 😊

[@wittyshweta2101]

Exactly what needed to hear today, thank you ❤

[@Itz_shanshan12]

I always have a situation where sometimes I do feel like no one does not know the real me everyone wants me to have a good life im aware of how am going to do it on my own because I've known my best friend for 14 years and my family does not approve of him I do value in our friendship i always focus on myself everyday I always be who i am in myself I do believe that im preparing myself to go to the job and I would be able to treat myself for the hard work that im doing.

[@elizabethfuentes9609]

More of this please 🫶🏽♥️💭

[@tawn33]

I like how one of the traits is being kind 🫶

[@jaaymark]

always love your content and the positive sentiments, eileen. that being said, i agree with other folks and recommend changing the title/revising the video

[@dinaruswanda9141]

THANKYOOOU SO MUCH IT'S HELP ME TO BOOOOOST MY SELF ESTEEEM ❤❤❤❤

[@U4RIAApp]

Absolutely mesmerizing! I'm in awe of your talent,

[@AlexandraMorneau]

I needed this

[@GalinaMalakhova]

You’re like a very wise and positive best friend :) I’m going through a very hard time right now and your videos are helping me push through and believe I can create the life I want

[@iridescent_skye]

watching your videos adds high value to my life. thank you Lavendaire :)

[@Imjustacatlady]

I feel a majority of people with this mindset believe they are better and more deserving of everyone else.

[@xmarala]

4:55!

[@anni1619]

Love this aileen!!!

[@arestaquilla]

I like this topic and YOU'RE SO PRETTYYYY OMG

[@jesnimsadique8723]

Your videos are so powerful.kindly include subtitles also...

[@TilikaVispute]

Always amazing, Aileen!!! 🎉❤

[@Potterhead819]

I am literally genuinely a high value person like I have all the qualities and traits you mentioned in this vedio and the reasons I am what I am now is you Aileen thank you so much for eyerthing because I feel like you are my guide through life that the universe gave me whenever I feel like I need some advice on something I just click on one of your vedios and you say the exact words I needed to hear so I am literally so grateful for you as I watched so much of your vedios about productivity burnouts happiness joy guided meditation guided affirmations self care habits and healing your self worth radical acceptance and everything literally so you are the reason I am who I am today a high value girl I am thirteen actually so much love from India from me ❤❤❤❤

[@cute_as_mochii9389]

13 ??

[@anjalisingh6389]

Yes I'm also see her video are very valuable..... Of our jonery ❤❤❤ thank you❤❤ soo much love from India🎉🎉

[@haneenbeto]

Thank you very much you have helped me a lot in developing myself and I love you

[@Fieldsplanet]

Thank you so much ❤

[@Rajesh_Godara_more]

This video is truly inspiring! I don’t usually share recommendations, but I have to tell you about the book women’s magic truths on borlest. It offers unique perspectives on wealth and self-care that you won’t find elsewhere. Wishing everyone all the best

[@evebodirwa]

This is so profound. 👌🏽

[@umamaluqman6875]

Love your aura🎀💗⭐️

[@aizamalubag-rondera1990]

You are very sincere always...luv u

[@SomewhataMystery]

Just like flowers require water to keep them beautiful. People require love , honesty , respect , trust , passion energy to keep them beautiful too.Once we give that , then we just may find that the god and goddess we been looking for has been right in front of you us all along.

[@cute_as_mochii9389]

Is thisss Real!!!!!! ,I was wondering about that morning, Thank you 💐☀️

[@sanjidayesminshuvra1883]

Love this! Thank you!

[@Teja.ot7]

Thanks for the video ❤

[@charmainebock3079]

Hi Thanks for sharing❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@claudamnn]

thank you for reminding me who I am as a woman

[@podcastsbytk]

Thank you ❤

[@toctoc144]

Aileen’s top shirt is beautiful ❤

[@NaanaaLeaf]

I can't believe that most of your audience doesn't know that the term "high value" is being reclaimed by women with high self esteem, respect, and confidence all over this platform especially. Stop letting incels and other misogynistic groups co-op and monopolize terms.

[@MichealsTochter]

Can you do a Video to how to get you Motivation and drives back ?

[@louisezhao662]

Nice video Aileen. I noticed that in your thumbnail you have the title: high value traits. Just curious, what are some low value traits that people(predominantly women since your audience is mainly women) possess? Maybe a better thumbnail would be just: "valuable traits". The "high" title seems a bit, classist.

[@lavendaire]

Ex. Low value traits are opposite of what I shared - not taking care of yourself bc you don’t believe you don’t deserve it, being mean & unkind, not having dreams or not believing you can achieve anything, thinking you’re dumb/stupid, self hate, etc etc. There is a difference and this is not talking about your “true value” but the value at which you see yourself. It’s the PERSPECTIVE of value. Hope that helps!