Narcissistic Mother Daughter Relationship

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Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach Inc

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 76

@lisaaromano1 9 ай бұрын

Are you a child of a narcissistic mother of father? And if so, how would you describe the inner thoughts you had to contend with while growing up and how do those inner thoughts impact you today? Please feel free to visit my website to take a short quiz at www.lisaaromano.com

@horrorgirl688 9 ай бұрын

I knew on my wedding day when my mother was jealous because I had a wedding dress that something was very wrong. I do not feel love for her. She is having surgery this morning, and I can't care less. However, I am doing for her because I am trying to do what I am supposed to. However it bothers me.

@the.toxic.phoenix 9 ай бұрын

I unconsciously followed in my mother's footsteps with relationships and having babies, but I thought I was walking my own path. I can see it looking back, and I certainly had more empathy and less narcism than her, and now I'm aware and changing

@lezafullerton5941 9 ай бұрын

Your words and guidance mean a lot to me right now. Thank you.

@lisaaromano1 9 ай бұрын

So glad!

@Cherry-kt8zo 8 ай бұрын

My mother would always tell me that I was just like her.I wasn't.

@DarlitaStephens 9 ай бұрын

I didn't watch the video, except for the first few minutes but I am one of those daughters whose mother is jealous of her. My grandmother, my mom's mom, was the first one to notice it because she was horrifically emotionally and psychologically abusive when I was a child, which got worse after I went through puberty. My grandmother flat out said to me, in front of my mom, "La (my nickname). Elaine is jealous of you" when she was calling me all kinds of names and belittling me one day. Nothing I did was enough to earn her love, and no child should be made to earn love. It should be given freely and abundantly. I kept the house clean, I had responsibilities that NO CHILD should have, I got good grades, held down a job, I wasn't mouthy and I wasn't loose (chasing boys). You see, I've come to realize and accept that my mom is also not capable of loving me because she hates herself and when a parent hates themselves, the child(ren) who are the same sex tend to catch Hell. She was a wonderful mother to my brother. I will not follow the same actions as my behavior because 1.....I don't hate myself because her, or no one else's, venom ever stuck. I actually have healthy self-love. 2.....ENVY never developed in me. I envy no one, therefore, I damn sure wouldn't envy my own child. 3.....I understand children and have realistic expectations of not just them, but others which is something my mom didn't of me.

@DarlitaStephens 9 ай бұрын

Just to continue.....the thing is my mom internalized the abuse she suffered for being the wrong man's child (the man I know as my grandfather was not her biological father). Yes, she does have the jealous bone but that was only a part of the reason she treated me the way she did. It wasn't until the summer before I turned 19 that I learned about her childhood directly from her. We sat on the floor in the living room that steamy summer day and she told me some of the stuff that they did to her and how she was treated. Before that moment, I thought that she just hated me for some reason but the truth was she hated herself. I then looked her square in the eyes, and told her that the the cycle stops with me. I made a vow to myself and my future children that they would be raised with love and acceptance. My mom wasn't aware that what they did to her and how they treated her was wrong. She was also unaware of her resulting wounds. That's where we differ. I knew how I was treated was wrong and I am aware of my wounds from my childhood....I have issues with crying in front of people and I am hyperindependent. I don't like needing anyone and don't really feel comfortable having to ask anyone for something. . Other than that....I'm good to go.

@BillieAnnaBanana16 9 ай бұрын

I have been through the same thing. I admire you for your strength and independence. You got that right about it stopping there. You'll be a wonderful Mother. Be the Mother(to your children) you should have had. I'm sorry but it may never end with your Mother. xx

@graveyardghost2603 9 ай бұрын

Your story sounds so much like my own! Blessings ❤

@DarlitaStephens 9 ай бұрын

@@BillieAnnaBanana16 Thank you so much for kind words. Being the mother I wish I had and that they need is exactly what I'm going to do.

@DarlitaStephens 9 ай бұрын

@@BillieAnnaBanana16 I'm sorry that you suffered as a child also.

@graveyardghost2603 9 ай бұрын

Even as a child i knew my stepmom was disturbed. Although i was damaged by her, yet i was blessed to have a wonderful grandmother who i considered my real mom, she was an inspiration to me ans helped me see the world in a better way. Thx for the video, Lisa ❤

@lisaaromano1 9 ай бұрын

Thanks for sharing!

@The1972maxim 9 ай бұрын

My mother was acting strangely.She would not support me or praise me behind the closed door She'd show off by talkig about my successes in public though....I used to be so astonishefd when i was approached by relatives and neighbours saying how my mother was happy with me and what i do....i could not believe It's the same person....Then i realized the praise was about her to make her look good .

@ABc-nu6jb 8 ай бұрын

It’s only about the fake public image to them, but nothing real about it and no depth

@Crystalquartz964 8 ай бұрын

It's still sad when a Narcissistic mother dies. My mother always told people that she and I "don't get on" which cut me like a knife. Now she's gone, I miss what never was.

@flowerchild89 9 ай бұрын

Me....I have a narcissistic mother. I'm 49. I went no contact in May 2022.

@Suelynngrr 9 ай бұрын

Wow, so powerful and insightful. I still struggle with these issues and my mom passed many years ago, while I approach my seventh decade! Thanks for the insights.

@lisaaromano1 9 ай бұрын

You are so welcome

@gigidayz6936 9 ай бұрын

My narc mother is insanely jealous of me...and has even admitted it

@ABc-nu6jb 8 ай бұрын

Sick and hard to even understand

@MACoote108 8 ай бұрын

I’m 52 and have 3 older sisters and two older brothers. All my life I have felt outside of my family. My father was not a good man and he eventually had to flee the country for reasons I won’t go into now. When he left, my mother found out she was pregnant with me. She has played the victim all her life, while we were spoken of as if we were the children of some demon. My Mother is very likeable to other people and has never been violent or aggressive in speech but she has lied to our faces, gaslighting us and keeping us always at a distance. I still love her deeply (she’s elderly now and we are doing our best to take care of her but boy is it hard!!!) she has forced us to share in her denial and it is and has been hell. Also my siblings and I have never really had a relationship with each other. Thankfully I have my own family now and I’m blessed and I thank God everyday that I have them. For anyone here who has suffered this situation my heart is with you, bless you xxx

@lisaaromano1 9 ай бұрын

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@Amylyn.. 9 ай бұрын

She changed what she should think I am every 4 minutes so I never know when she was going to beat me up real bad .. for no reason ... I was out on the streets by 12 years old

@StudiosDelirium 9 ай бұрын

So sorry😢

@Amylyn.. 9 ай бұрын

@@StudiosDelirium I'm am alive and well and very happy 😊😊 I just turned 50 and just learning how to work at handling this and it going way better than I ever hoped for ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

@arleneandrea3584 9 ай бұрын

Happy to hear that you’re doing well, stay encouraged🙏🏽💜

@Amylyn.. 9 ай бұрын

@@arleneandrea3584 I hope you're doing well and healing just fine 💓

@StudiosDelirium 9 ай бұрын

Wonderful! You’re a real life hero for sure. Stay happy and peaceful on your path to healing. All the very best.

@f.t.9889 9 ай бұрын

My mom harasses me even though I have cut contact with her. She shows up at my door and tries to manipulate/guilt/force me to open the door. I won't. Earlier this week she opened my apartment door mailbox and told me through it that I'm going to end up in hell because I don't want to have contact with her...

@Ariadne76-k3d 9 ай бұрын

I do think my mother was jealous of me.

@AremAsha 9 ай бұрын

No mine told me it’s my fault that we don’t have a normal mother daughter relationship and insinuated to me and others that I’m borderline.It’s even worse when that mother had you at 17 as a solo mum and had contempt for her own mum (who is quite histrionic and exaggerates like crazy and insults peoples looks and personality constantly). My nana told my mum she wished she had aborted her. My mum said she took great pleasure in manipulating her mother and pulling out the desired emotions. My mother gaslights me endlessly, doesn’t self reflect and has never apologised that I have heard, or taken accountability in any situation.

@AgendaInMind 9 ай бұрын

Is it possible for her to become a narcissist as she ages? Mine didn’t seem to be, but rather was codependent to my severely covert father. However, in the past 10 years (she’s 80 now), she has gotten angrier, resentful, unable to please, negative, etc. She goes out of her way to show me that I cannot make her happy. Thankfully I learned it’s not my job.

@lisaaromano1 9 ай бұрын

She may not feel happy about how her life has panned out.

@NadinePanici-zh4tp 6 ай бұрын

I wish I had the knowledge of what narcissim was. I was born in 1952 and my sister 1950. Both my parents were soldiers in WW2. My father a lifelong soldier. He left raising his 2 little girls to his wife. My mother was highly critical, cruel, no empathy, beat us with a belt. My sister constantly rebelled and I cowered. My sister was brilliant. A member of mensa. But she was fat and my mother never let her forget it. I was the good child. As soon as I got home from school I cleaned the house and made dinner. I was 10. My sister became a drug addict and alcoholic. With several attempts at suicide. My mother told her not to kill herself until after she was dead. She didn't make it. She succeeded at 55. I then became my mother's full time caretaker. I learned about narcissim after her death at 95. I am 71 now and alone. My sister and I never had children. I have no boundaries. No self esteem. Chronic health problems and isolate myself. My joy in life is my faith and my dogs. Peace to all of these daughters and God Bless.

@The1972maxim 9 ай бұрын

❤Thank you ♥️ You are my mother figurę....strangely enough we are roughly the same age.All the best❤

@angellight9588 9 ай бұрын

Thank You 💜

@lisaaromano1 9 ай бұрын

You are so welcome

@Amylyn.. 9 ай бұрын

Showing love to everyone in the comment section ❤️

@kingaogiegloabstractpaintings 9 ай бұрын

I am in this process in breaking away from my mothers karmic wheel, shes has had vertigo and I have vertigo for the past couple of days😍it is tough.thank you❤❤❤

@aLightShines 9 ай бұрын

So my mom is Jehovah's Witness. (No disrepect to her choice of faith or religion) I am not a JW. I went with her to all the meetings etc until i was about ten years old and stopped going at that time as my dad didnt go (he was Catholic) I stayed home with him❤ I was the scapegoat in the family. My brother and sister were golden childs. My mom saw me as extension of herself. She used the religion (JW) as a platform for her covert narcissism. She would glare at me with such disgust (I could see her from the corner of my eye) when I would smile at different things at home that would make me happy, such as holding my first cat pet named fluffy. I will never forget that day as well as many others. One time she got so angry with me she came at with this rage and left scratch marks on my chest with her car keys. When I became pregnant at 19, I had a child out of "wedlock"... I was Criticized by my mom for everything that i was... i was soo sensitive, i cried soo much etc. etc etc. I used too much water, my getting ready in the morning for highschool was a so called "ritual" to her (her words) So i was criticized for taking pride in my appearance each morning and having good hygiene. Really? good grief. To this day, i long for that my mom to be able to talk to who would give me advice on life, but still to this day, i only get advice such as "your a smart girl" you can figure it out"... well gee thanks. So hows the weather mom? I dont see hardly any stories or channels on this kind of life experience anyone has gone through. What so sad is, Im not so sure she even has the emotional intelligence or capacity to even understand the damage she caused to my emotional well being etc. or the tears and sadness she caused in my heart over the years....To this day she on a regular will not return my hugs. She will literally stand there with her arms at her side and will not embrace me while I hug her. I think what do her arms not work? smh She has gotten better about saying she loves me back when I tell her I love her before I hang up with her before bed, but its not consistent. Generational curses, break them! They must be broken. Save your children the trauma and broken hearts please. The pain becomes enmeshed and its a beast (childhood trauma) to heal but it is possible with Him!🙏☝️ Let your Light Shine! Your light will always shine no matter the dark that follows. ❤🙏☝️

@khristinadenmark9189 9 ай бұрын

Made in His image, Creator of the universe Gos Almighty

@anastasiafederschneider2242 9 ай бұрын

He IS the answer to inner healing and breaking off this wheel and cycle. He IS the greatest awakening that’ll unveil your mind and lead to the road of abundant life.

@sparklingloveandlight 9 ай бұрын

My mom has commented on my "nicer facial features" than her and other body parts like legs, stomach etc lol.

@ricklocked3820 9 ай бұрын

Before I listen to this video l have to say now that its been awhile since your mother passed. Mine just passed on new years eve. Like your dad mine is still alive. I'am willing to love. When she was took from this world it took the love I had for her, there's no other, won't be. Love that strong binds and blinds.

@xoxox.skinnychef 9 ай бұрын

Pack of wolves… bingo!

@Ballpython77 9 ай бұрын

my ex covert wife and her Narcissist mother.

@peterharris6604 9 ай бұрын

Thanks , you’re super!

@SoniaProteau-cj6tk 9 ай бұрын

I think my buddies realized this too

@paulaariola7018 9 ай бұрын

I have know this about being my mother and tried so hard not to but in some ways i did. I've struggled a long time with trying to fix the relation with my daughter but she doesn't want to. How can i still fix myself and will i ever get to fix the relationship with my daughter? There were occasions where some things are truly her fault and my emotion took over at that time

@caroleminke6116 9 ай бұрын

Only change your own behavior ❤ do it for yourself not anyone else 😊 begin by loving your abandoned inner child like the mother you had couldn’t love you ❤

@paulaariola7018 9 ай бұрын

how can i start with the inner child. this is something i have wanted to do for me bc i know it will also change the relationships around me.@@caroleminke6116

@paulaariola7018 9 ай бұрын

I am trying to figure out if i did or not with a narcissistic parent anyway to have a quick convo

@allykale2824 9 ай бұрын

Do you have a video explaining daughters jealous of their mothers? Thank you and namaste ♥️

@maryros3249 9 ай бұрын

I don't believe this I spent 35 years and it did not work I should never have a kids if I want to break the chain this is the only way and on the way

@SoniaProteau-cj6tk 9 ай бұрын

I m not the only one in this situation 😂

@xOnlyCarlyx 2 ай бұрын

There is a lack of content regarding covert narcissistic fathers here. The narc father will triangulate to cause the trauma bonded daughter to compete and be jealous of her mother. It is insidious and demonstrates misogyny , as he uses both for fuel.