Love Is Blind - Season 5 - #58 - (Aaliyah Arrives) - Therapist Reacts

[@oyiegeronimo]

Lydia got a serious pass for everything she’s done because they are the only ones who got/still married.

[@sokanhakong634]

I think so too. It seems like there is a hierarchy in the show.

[@MomandBuggs]

Maybe cause Lydia got married so she got favored, they needed her. But Uche wasn’t there either so maybe they felt it wasn’t necessary since he couldn’t counter anything she would say

[@pwetty4r4]

Production was rewarding her

[@Youokhun]

@@MomandBuggsuche declined the invite

[@mimicallsit7675]

Agreed, and it seems that due to Aaliyah’s friendship with Johnnie, Stacey was apathetic to her position.

[@catherinemarie08]

In an interview Aaliyah did share that she thinks some of Lydia's oversharing was spurred on by producers. Also that she allowed Lydia to keep talking because she didn't want to come across as a stereotyped angry black woman. It seems like a no win situation.

[@ashleyw.6702]

Maybe the producers wanted to use Lydia to provoke Aaliyah into a dramatic emotional meltdown... and failed.

[@catherinemarie08]

@SeventiesLeo She also said that the conversation shown was a small part of what Lydia said and that part of the conversation wasn't filmed because it took place in the bathroom. So it sounds like Lydia was un-yielding.

[@AllyMack23]

@@catherinemarie08It wasn't in the bathroom, it was in the shuttle from the hotel to the set

[@catherinemarie08]

@@AllyMack23 That's right. It was in a vehicle where you can't escape. So messed up.

[@pwetty4r4]

Your recap is more entertaining than the reunion actually was

[@PsychologyInSeattle]

Ha!

[@DJ-lu5np]

I was very displeased with how Aaliyah was handled. Lydia’s behavior was completely excused…no one held her feet to the fire for crossing the same boundary Milton suggested Uche crossed. Stacey made a stupid joke prior to Aaliyah’s entrance & almost everyone was cold when she came out. Her entire experience was mishandled, imo.

[@ahmorgan]

What did Stacey say?

[@Lucy_Fontaine]

Aaliyah was annoying and bitter bc her childish ass ruined a marriage for herself. Sure Lydia was weird but Aaliyah didn’t have to leave like a big ass baby, and it shows that she’s bitter about it afterwards and tryna blame everyone but herself lol. She was so close and she chose to leave to make a statement but it just backfired

[@Bree5three]

@@ahmorganSomething like, "Oh she's showing up this time" or "I hope she comes this time"

[@ahmorgan]

@@Bree5three ah some slick unnecessary shit. I got you, thanks.

[@AntoniaG1991]

The way the hosts treated Aaliyah during the reunion is so unfair. The was completely robbed of her experience and offered NO apology, while Lydia was coddled as part of the only married couple of the season. In the face of all of this she still has so much grace Dr. Kirk you should watch the black women's reunion with Jessie Woo!

[@emilyz3932]

I would have liked to see Lydia take more accountability at the reunion

[@steffany3513]

Yeah the growth we saw from people this season has to be measured in millimeters.

[@APerson-qw8yy]

She cant bc it she would view it as against “herself”

[@JustRaeesa]

Me too

[@JustRaeesa]

I particularly wish attention had been given to Lydia when Milton said he doesn't like Uche because Uche didn't respect a clear boundary, yet Lydia didn't respect Aliyah's clear boundary and I wish someone had responded to Milton with that

[@Bree5three]

@@JustRaeesa Aaliyah said that she did rebut but that was edited out. I wish more people were on Aaliyah's side to poke holes in his logic.

[@theherogothamdeserves]

I think their off screen fight might have been Lydia oversharing again and Aaliyah said, "if he dosen't propose, you can have him (bc you still like him)" Lydia's oversharing definitely came off more like a girl talking about a guy she's seeing and into. In the reunion she said she felt relieved to be able to share things she knew but what she shared was, "his dog loves me so much he pees every times he sees me, Uche and I had sex 3 months ago" and not, "remember how he gave you hard time on cheating? He cheated on me and I'm telling you bc I don't want to see you get hurt" I think the show is giving Lydia a pass bc they used her voice as a soundbite to cover up Renee's appearance at the dress fitting and Cameron from season 1 said in one of his videos, "if you're ever on a show like Love is Blind, you don't have to get naked bc producers may tell you that you'll get a better story line but that's not true, you don't have to do it" and there were a lot of Milton×Lydia shower scenes. I speculate that Lydia does what the producers want/ask so she was given a pass during the reunion. Everyone deserves love so it's great that Lydia was able to find it with Milton but I think all Aaliyah wanted from Lydia was for her to take accountability/admit that Lydia still did like Uche while also befriending her.

[@kristinrodier2217]

I am also just realizing from Aliyah’s perspective, how would she have gone through the whole show with Lydia right there in all the group events!?!? I’d feel under a microscope, given how Lydia is not reading the room. I couldn’t have stayed on the show in the same position.

[@empressdostomousky-ow8xs]

There are some issues regarding Lydia and Uche that simply don’t make sense. They spoke so highly of each other to Aaliyah only to later accuse each other of being a stalker and a cheater, respectively. I can’t put my finger on it, but the story just doesn’t add up.

[@happygolucky9004]

I think Aaliya was stressed and when she asked Lydia to stop, Lydia kept going. So regardless of if the info that Lydia was giving was benign, Aaliyah asked Lydia to stop. That was very disrespectful of Lydia.

[@julie91295]

One other realization I have watching the couch scene again is subconsciously Lydia might feel more the impulse to share with Aliyah more as she’s sensing distance and coldness from her. The demeanor she has could be interpreted as some power move to show dominance Iike look how much I know about him. However it could be a desperate attempt to get closer by sharing information and almost get Aliyah to see how little she cares about Uche and that we’re just girlfriends gabbing sharing the “tea” about some guy we both knew. It’s hard to explain but it’s like a mechanism that kicked in for some ppl to fit in and be closer to their friends is to over share and basically “omg did you know about this”. When you’re young as a girl, it’s kind of the way lots of us are socialized to enter a clique or get closer to ppl. I think in a weird way, her demeanor can also look like her way to trying to establish the air of “omg here’s the tea girl”. If she truly was close with Aliyah and really bonded with her, I can see her feel the need to draw her closer as she sense her pulling away. Like when you’re flustered and nervous, you couldn’t stop yapping. When Lydia felt desperate to hold on yo Aliyah friendship, she started over compensate by over sharing and trying to establish that sisterly vibe of girls just gabbing about some dude we both hooked up with once before. Aliyah rejecting it but not so aggressively that she can pickup on the anger but enough for her to feel the distance probably make her even more desperate to push more so she can show Aliyah even more “look like idc he’s not a big deal to me. We can talk about it, I can give you all the tea girl” it’s mostly all subsconciously done so she probably can’t explain why she didn’t read the room or could t stop talking. I was turned off by Lydia so hard the first time I saw the scene and thought it was malicious like everyone else. However given Uche shady behavior, the fact that Lydia is happily married to Milton and literally didn’t seem to give Uche a second thought she was focused on Milton and Izzy and then completely enamored with Milton to remember Uche, this all makes me feel different rewatching the scene.

[@emiluontube-you]

Yes!! This!!! I feel like this is what I was seeing, rambling to maintain closeness!

[@4everArtista]

I think you are giving Lydia a lot of grace. She seems like a very intelligent person who always seems well rehearsed. Uche is by no means innocent. But neither is she.

[@vrindasview2714]

Yeah but the point was that she was learning all those details through his ex! Lydia was even talking about how his dog loves her, she was paining a vision of her (Lydia) and Uche's life together

[@charlielovelove2626]

The thing that baffled me was.... Why create a friendship with the very woman your ex has a connection with.. i couldn't wrap my head around that.. its one question they did not ask and i wish they did..

[@applepie3276]

Lydia took zero accountability and that pissed me tf off

[@erinamyr18]

I just watched an interview with Taylor and she said that she was scouted on Instagram, then only had one interview before she was picked to be on the show. She agreed that the vetting process should be much more extensive. I’m surprised they do that little research/interviews on these people they force together for 10 days.

[@lolitagonzalez3493]

After everything we’ve seen, I think it was Uche who followed her

[@thisismyinferno]

Someone once said, that its interesting that Johnie, who admittedly goes for people that are walking red flags was the one that seemingly believed Uche the most.

[@thisismyinferno]

Sorry, I'm sure the names are spelled wrong.

[@e-bo9115]

Or Lydia's story makes no sense, and Johnnie caught onto it?

[@143Shayx]

She didnt say she believed him She said Uche is good at convincing people because both are lawyera

[@pwetty4r4]

They are both lawyers too

[@Erica-en2qz]

​@@thisismyinferno You spelled them correctly!

[@jacquelinemarie9655]

I stand by my suspicion that Lydia told that stuff about her and Uche’s relationship to Aaliyah to try and give Aaliyah the ick about the whole situation, even if it wasn’t a fully conscious effort kn her part. And it worked! Largely thanks to Uche’s judgemental and harsh words! It was all just too much for Aaliyah and idk anyone who would put up with half the stuff she did without blowing up or going off on Lydia or Uche. Wild.

[@skyetranqille9534]

It kind of seems like to me that netflix is leaving the door open for possible drama should two people know each other. Which is exactly what occured this season. They're not completely prioritizing preserving the sanctity of the expeirment. They also want the buzz.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

100% agree. Calling the show an "experiment" is a marketing ploy. They've created a high intensity situation to create dramatic moments that they can sell for entertainment. Their laissez-faire approach is to increase the opportunity for drama, while they claim it's to prevent interference.

[@skyetranqille9534]

@@zacharyjohnson1193 perfectly stated.

[@MomandBuggs]

Uche not coming clean to Aaliyah about Lydia when she came clean was a missed opportunity and a insight into Uche’s character. I never saw Lydia pursing Uche but Uche reaching out to her and giving Lydia’s fiancée “advise”. Not saying it was bad but didn’t look good on Uche’s part. It does make me wonder why Lydia would get so close to Aaliyah, that doesn’t look good either and is sus.

[@SEOshogun]

You did see Lydia pursue Uche, though. On the pods, she immediately wanted to rekindle. And then she pursued Aaliyah. She told Aaliyah that she and Uche had just decided to start anew, and that was a lie. Go back and look at them in the pods. That's what she asked him, there was no decision. I don't think Lydia's a bad person, but she was wrong in her handling of her "friend" Aaliyah

[@MomandBuggs]

I missed where she wanted to rekindle. Yeah it was weird that she got so close to Aaliyah. Uche tried to make her look like a crazy stalker to everyone yet he interfered with her relationship. And he went to the bbq when Aaliyah wasn’t even there 🤔But then this show is produced and there is a lot of alcohol flowing so who knows what’s really going on.

[@regularity2556]

​@@SEOshogun we never saw Lydia trying to talk to Uche again tho, she moved on, yet, Uche showed up at the BBQ to talk to her, and basically rehashed their relationship, then he went to Milton to try to mess up that relationship. It's weird seeing people call her a stalker when Uche is literally stalking her and her new man. 😅

[@Bree5three]

@@regularity2556 Nah it's obvious that was producer led, for drama, and I think after Aaliyah told him she left because of his ex, he felt slighted. I get being petty and spiteful if I feel like I had your back and didn't tell people all the stuff I knew about you but you led the floodgates open about me and ruined a connection I had in the process. They were both toxic and kept running back to one another though according to the story he gave Aaliyah.

[@SEOshogun]

​@@regularity2556my theory is that Uche thought he and Lydia would be friendly. He first said she was trustworthy. But when she interfered with his connection with Aaliyah I think he was bitter and felt cheated. Aside from the show not having very much content, I think they asked him to confront Lydia for the show, but I also think he was all too happy to do it. Doesn't change the fact that Lydia also showed an unhealthy obsession with Uche. Thus all the oversharing with Aaliyah. also did you see the receipts where Uche and milton had a 4 hour FaceTime call? Apparently he and Milton had these long discussions that may explain why he thought they were close enough that he could reach out.

[@Nita_Key]

It doesn't matter what kind of information Lydia was sharing about Uche, only a snippet of which we saw, Aaliyah said she didn't want to know any of it. That should have been respected. Also Lydia was 100% marking her territory saying she hung out with Uche's friends, his dog loves her, they just slept together a few months ago. Where was her verbal diarrhea when she was sharing about Uche with Milton??? She was doing the mute challenge with him, didn't say half of the stuff she told Aaliyah. It pissed me off that Aaliyah's feelings weren't validated at the reunion.

[@nbf25]

I think Lydia was coached to give the answer she gave. And I think the reunion purposely gave everyone softballs and purposely leaned away from any difficult questions.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

I assume the number one goal of the show is to protect the "integrity" of the show.

[@exactlyerica9285]

We did the birthday thing in a math class and I did share a birthday with one person. You do need a group of 22/23 people for it to work.😊

[@ImAllisonWonderland]

I wonder how things could have gone if Aaliyah never mentioned to Lydia that she knew. Is it possible that Lydia interpreted Aaliyah telling her that she knew as an invitation to spill everything? Aaliyah could have kept the information between she and Uche and just quietly distanced herself. She claims that had she known from the beginning that's what she would have done, so why couldn't she do that on her own once she knew?

[@jcocco.1]

You should look up the rule called “6 degrees to Kevin bacon” but basically any 2 people can be linked together through just 6 acquaintances!

[@84Elenai]

The way the whole production and cast treated Aaliyah at the reunion 😖 Gaslighting at its finest. Like if she had to be blamed for some reason. That was seriously hard to watch.

[@turnitupwithnelly-2337]

I do think Lydia was being honest. Maybe honest to a fault. Shes the type to have to process her own feelings before she can tackle others. Shes also a bulldozing personality. I dont think she had ill intentionsband honestly also reacting to the messed up situation too. I feel bad for Aaliyah. Uche was scum in my opinion and i find it weird he only pushed the stalker narrative once things blew up in his face.

[@jamie6639]

I think Lydia was very much fascinated and obsessed with Uche's wealth and appearance. So even when she knew they weren't going to work out, and she didn't want to pursue him anymore, I think she was still obsessed with the memories of experiencing his wealth and social status. Hence drinking his favorite drinks, etc. I think she was hung up on the sensations she experienced dating Uche coz she comes from different economic backgrounds (as Milton, who comes from a wealthy family, mentioned)

[@ahmorgan]

I agree with you. This also seems to be the only logical explanation as to how any woman can stand to be around Uche

[@AntoniaG1991]

@@ahmorgan 100% D:

[@whtyc]

I think it’s possible Lydia was feeling guilty about Aaliyah not knowing about her past with Uche, bc production told her not to say anything. I think it’s possible she’s upset bc she’s lying by omission to her friend. Just a possible interpretation. I honestly don’t think Lydia was that interested in Uche. And didn’t have any agenda other than friendship with Aaliyah. I have steamroller friends, I can be a steamroller. I’m definitely a verbal processor. So Lydia’s actions make sense to me in a benign context.

[@littleghosdt]

I think the part about Lydia sharing the details about Uche simply triggered a lot of discomfort in Aaliyah, namely her insecurities and trust issues around relationships. She stated that she would never put herself in the situation of dating a friend’s ex, and I think what Lydia did (regardless of what she shared) demonstrated to her the exact reasons why she doesn’t like these situations. When someone is especially insecure they wonder about, and/or compare themselves to their partner’s ex(es), it’s just where the thoughts go! And in general, I feel like a lot of people don’t like to think about their partner’s previous relationships-particularly in monogamous dating but not unique to it. So for Aaliyah, being friend’s with Lydia, or just in the continued experiment meant having to be faced with those thoughts constantly. Lydia’s behavior felt over-involved (it probably ceased to feel like her [Aaliyah] and Uche’s private relationship) and could even be interpreted as bragging, and especially since Aaliyah felt she wasn’t being listened to, it was just too much. *edited for specificity in who I was referring to

[@julianitaalisa]

I don't condone the behaviour that we saw from Uche on the show, but I honestly think that Lydia was mostly responsible for the drama that played out in this situation. It is extremely weird that she got so close to Aaliyah knowing what she knew. I imagine that it would have gone down very differently if Uche had told Aaliyah "There is someone that I knew before the show" and it was just some other girl that Aaliyah hardly talked to in the lounge. The hurt stemmed from broken trust and I think that Aaliyah already had some trust issues coming into the show. She repeatedly said things like "I'm scared", "I just don't want to get hurt". So I think it really hit home for her.

[@Bree5three]

I ultimately say Aaliyah ruined her own experience because I still think with everything disclosed it wasn't worth her leaving BUT yes in a extremely close 2nd would be Lydia. As Milton said they both were "victims" to these two's past but he persevered; probably because he didn't have such a strong bond with Uche to make him feel super conflicted. Lydia knew ALL of the info for the longest time, it really was on her to keep a safe distance. Like you're either obsessed or there to do some sabotage choosing to befriend your ex's current partner, either way is psychotic.

[@srm0520]

There were several other women who appeared on Jessie Woo’s channel who were in the pods and never made it on the show with a relationship. All of them had off vibes w Lydia. A couple said they started our her friend and over time realized more about her and now don’t speak to her. Obviously everyone has their own views and perceptions but I thought it was kind of telling 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@ImAllisonWonderland]

It was three women.

[@Ununpentium]

My speculation about Lydia: She went on the show with a glimpse of hope to get back together with Uche. When she realized that didn't work, she tried to project herself into Alliyah to get her to not repeat her own mistakes kind of. At least that is my feeling after the season.

[@Mrs_PinkMarie77]

21:00 Please Please Dr. Honda, if you have time, watch to @jessie woo interview with Aaliyah, > Its about 2 hrs but sheds so much light as to what Aaliyah REALLY went through on and off camera! She opens up about her FULL experience as to why she left and why she feels she DID NOT get the full love is blind experience. She explains that there was soooo much edited out from the reunion filming and some things happened to her off camera with Lydia, during the pods, that further illuminates her decision to leave the show. Thankfully, she grew from the experience and is happy now in a good loving relationship, I'm happy for her.

[@samanthaleigh805]

Does anyone else agree that Vanessa redeemed herself since last season’s reunion?

[@PsychologyInSeattle]

Yeah, she followed up on the questions that I was curious about. Of course, there were other questions left out of the edit.

[@ligli500]

When they got the whiteboards out for the game, I was really worried a question like "How many kids do you want?" would be asked. Glad it wasn't! The hosts did a better job this time, although it wasn't perfect. Glad they improved though.

[@UnaSolaEstrella]

Based on the edit, I didn’t perceive Lydia as a malicious person or a Machiavellian schemer.

[@helloleesh]

I don’t think Aaliyah was just trying to avoid “the spoilers”. I watched an interview, and it sounded like there was immense pressure from all sides. Tension in the pods with Uche and tension in the lounge with Lydia. She couldn’t get away from thinking about her new love’s previous relationship. It’s already enough to be in the same room as his ex, but when his ex is always around and then always shoving bits of information that remind Aaliyah that Lydia was in his house, in his bed, with his friends, with his dog… HOW can you enjoy a budding relationship when these thoughts of them are being shoved in your face despite setting boundaries? It’s too much. You, Me, and Dupree on crack. It’s not just spoilers. It’s intrusive mental images.

[@annekenney6914]

My 9th grade Math teacher posed that question to our class and it turned out that he and I had the same birthday. It was very embarrassing for a teenage girl.

[@sonjagrosse-broemer6493]

I don't think for Aaliyah it was necessarily so much that info was shared or what type of info...it was the not respecting of boundaries and the realization how recent the past is and how connected they still are in a way and how much Lydia also still seems to continue to wanting to be a part of his life...the inconsistencies between stories of both at the beginning and the betrayal itself.

[@blackmber]

It would be hard for potential cast members to produce a list of everyone they know, and it would be easy to lie about it. Maybe production uses other methods to reduce the chance of casting two people who know each other, such as asking about their past education, workplaces, or organizations they have been involved in, or by checking their social media contacts. Almost everyone I know would fall under one of those umbrellas.

[@colettephair]

But even if you already know a person very well, as you usually do when you're engaged, you still have a honeymoon experience. So it makes sense that it could be ruined for her from finding out info that makes it more real. But yes maybe it was the fact that her boundaries weren't respected that was a greater issue in a way too.

[@Gchili]

Uche didn't consider it a relationship yet he was so obsessed about the way things ended that he cornered every single person to rattle on compulsively about the "non relationship" and was the ONLY person unwilling to let it go.

[@thesapphireempress9635]

I feel for Aaliyah and I hate the way that she was treated from the start. She was the one who was truly done wrong this season, and it disturbs me the way that Lydia completely got a pass for her behavior and her role in Aaliyah’s mistreatment. She (Lydia) along with Uche, who shouldn’t be let off the hook either, ruined the experience for Aaliyah, and no one has truly held her accountable for that. Her oversharing and growing close to Aaliyah in the pods, disrespecting her when she said that she didn’t want to hear about her and Uche’s past, and then refusing to give her a true, heartfelt apology, or even check in with her once they left the pods considering how hurt Aaliyah was, reveals a lot about her character. I don’t believe for a second that Lydia was unaware of what she was doing. To make matters worse, it seems that everyone else is brushing aside Aaliyah’s valid, palpable pain in order to validate the illusion of the show and to protect Lydia, whether they acknowledge it or not. Look at their body language when Aaliyah comes out; everyone is treating her like an outsider. And even at the reunion, she never got the chance to fully share her perspective without constantly being interrupted. Even Milton’s comments towards Aaliyah during the reunion were deflective and placed all of the blame on her shoulders: “I’m sorry if you like this wasn’t a good experience for you,” (para) instead of acknowledging that it wasn’t, period.

[@whyme7862]

According to Aaliayah after Lydia confirmed that she knew Uche she kept coming back and giving her more information even after she told her that she didn't want to know.

[@Drs195]

I’ve applied for the show. It’s super easy to see the initial questions they ask. Just Google how to apply and it should come up!

[@slow.and.hot717]

And are previous relationships among those initial questions or not?

[@LizNeptune]

I HATE that Lydia spoke first before Aaliyah, especially after a montage of her being a diabolical psycho! I don't understand anyone seeing Lydia closely befriending Aaliyah as anything other than conniving. That seems like something I read in the 48 Laws of Power.

[@AliciaAmbrosia]

The missed mark here is all this is hyper, speed, emotions, etc. uche and Aaliyah were basically engaged & Lydia was legitimately aaliyahs best friend. It’s disrespectful of Lydia to be so close to Aaliyah and then to bulldoze with all those intimate details, meanwhile saying she wanted the best for Aaliyah. I’m the real world of that was your best friend, they wouldn’t be.

[@JustAnEmptyCageGirl]

Not true. Aaliyah said in an interview that she was best friends with Mr America aka JP.

[@AliciaAmbrosia]

@@JustAnEmptyCageGirl it’s possible to have multiple besties. JP didn’t have the same proximity to Aaliyah as Lydia and also JP did not have the same history as Lydia.

[@smartmarketing173]

The producers did Aaliyah so dirty. Lydia is super sus, I think she planned the show to bag Uche, but lucky for her, she convinced Milton to marry her. Everyone on the show owes her a big apology and a re-do.

[@kimmi2662]

The look on Aaliyah's face should have told Lydia everything, the poor girl obviously didn't want to know the deets on Uche, none of it was for the purpose bonding, just look at me (Lydia) I had him first, blah blah blah

[@papasucre]

The birthday probability equation is fun. I majored in math and one of my profs did it in our class. I think we had between 30-35 students in the class and the percentage was 75%. Two people did have a June 21 birthday, and I know quite a few people with that birthdate too.

[@noelleirina5628]

In the court of law, testimony (other people saying what happened) is considered evidence.

[@donnabohanon1570]

It was inappropriate for Lydia to share so much information, especially when her “friend” Aaliyah asked her not to. Aaliyah says she thinks production prompted her to continue days later. If production did this, Lydia did not have to comply. Afterwards Out of frustration Aaliyah told Lydia she could have Uche back. Lydia replied, FU. At this point Aaliyah left. Question, if Lydia respected her friend’s feelings why did she continue to provide information when asked not to. Why tell your friend, FU? And finally, why not address Aaliyah at the reunion directly ( apologize to her, look at her to explain herself). Lydia’s said to the group, “I obviously didn’t read the room.” What?? The room? How about you didn’t read Aaliyah, “her friend”, correctly. Why not say that. To me Lydia’s dismissiveness demonstrated at the reunion is telling. Lydia has no reason to be salty towards Aaliyah. Regardless of how Uche turned out to be Lydia’s actions toward Aaliyah were inappropriate. Period.

[@AntoniaG1991]

I think she was coached on what to say to Aaliyah beforehand and even with the help of outsiders, "I didn't read the room" was the best she/they could come up with. She seems really unwilling to do things in a different way or admit where she went wrong because she's too in love with the idea of herself as an "extremely emotional person". It's a great way to never take accountability or even try to control yourself in situations.

[@Bree5three]

No the "read the room" comment infuriates me because she didn't even need to deduce anything, Aaliyah literally says "I do not want to know" so there was nothing up for misinterpretation, you just did not respect her wishes point blank period.

[@sonjagrosse-broemer6493]

Several things I had issues with with this reunion. The fact that Lydia immediately speaks telling her side of the story, not even really giving Aaliyah a chance to say something first. The worst...then, I dont understand why Lydia isnt questioned more. She claims she LOVED Aaliyah...so with all that oversharing there are two options: she did it completely on her own, which is just mean and you should not do with a person you claim to love, I mean her oversharing was not just info that may be helpful, she also shared stuff that basically indicated "his friends, his dog, his environment would still prefer me as his girlfriend...you will always be second" and she lied, planting doubt as if Uche may have wanted to get back with her...either way, none of this is stuff a friend, a loved one would do...other option: she was pushed by the producers to do it all. In a way that would be almost worse, that you hurt a person you claim to love that way just because a producer tells you to? Almost prefer the first option in that case. The other thing I really hated is that Milton seriously compares his situation to Aaliyah's when he also clearly states that he has no friendly feelings towards Uche...so his situation wasnt the same. Aaliyah was betrayed and pushed to the limit by a person (Lydia) who was at that time very close to her. The other thing Milton said he compared her situation with others who just didnt find love...that also isnt the same, they still got the full extend of the experiment it just did not work out for them...Aaliyah on the othet hand was fully cheated out of the entire experience as everything was fake. She really got the short end of the stick here and the hosts are the worst...they did not even really give her a voice, almost as if everybody would have preferred for her not to show up. According to what Aaliyah said in other interviews they cut her responses short a LOT!!! I think Aaliyah got screwed in the entire thing.

[@tzipporah7635]

Fun fact about people sharing the same birthday: At my small work organization (we're talking a staff of 6) out of all of us, 3 of us share the same birthday of Sept 12 but different years😂 One of my colleagues and I even share the same Chinese horoscope (the Dragon) and her mom and I are born only 5 days apart, same year. Lots of crazy coincidences!😮I've never in my lifetime encountered anything quite like this..

[@srm0520]

What I don’t understand is that this show makes millions of dollars, right? Can they not afford to hire private investigators to examine their final contestants to see if they know each other? I mean there’s only like 30 people in the final final round of things. I wouldn’t blindly trust the cast to reveal all of their connections, but at the very least have people investigate their social media to try to see if they follow each other. It seems like production is a little sloppy about it which makes me think the potential drama that ensues because of prior relationships isn’t something they care to do away with.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

Integrity is expensive. Given how centered much of the edit and talk of this season surrounded the Lydia/Uche debacle, I imagine it was more profitable to let the drama play out.

[@Sough]

It wasn't just leading question from vanessa, it was a leading answer. Trying to defend their married couples at all cost.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

With such a high failure rate of your core theory, you gotta fight for the successes!

[@inferno7289]

Lydia sounds like she has a lot of friends despite being a bad friend herself

[@RenayOpish]

If you are someone that will push back enough, I think Lydia would be a pretty wonderful friend.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

​@@RenayOpishwould you mind expanding on that?

[@julest5767]

karen and miles knew each other before, from mafs new orleans season.

[@Bree5three]

Amani and Woodie too, their story is he literally saw her and thought she was cute maybe up to week before. Actually so were Amelia and Bennett which I think they admitted in the show. So practically everyone from that NOLA season lol.

[@gusbulni]

I understand why aaliah was feeling uncomfortable. This "friend" lied to her and in some way try to insert herself into the relationship. I am not sure how to explain. I have a feeling lydia didnt give all the information to be kind. She wanted to get in her head. Ahh maybe she felt bad because uche was saying somethinga and lydia says other things. They both confused her. Both treated her bad.

[@FlipFlopnFlowers]

I can get feeling overwhelmed and dismayed by the new information. I don’t understand why Aliyah just didn’t leave the conversation. People will violate your boundaries and I believe it’s also your responsibility on how to act in those situations(ie like leaving the conversation). There are also tons of reasons why someone might violate your boundaries and not all of them are malicious. It seems backwards to me that Aliyah approached this situation by assuming Lydia’s intent and never asking Lydia. I think Lydia wasn’t a good friend for Aliyah and I also don’t think Aliyah isnt a good friend to Lydia. They don’t jive. I don’t find it reasonable the way most contestants operate on this show. It’s not realistic to how things works, unless the contestants have a goood enough relational intelligence then making friends, making partners in the environment of the show won’t have a good outcome. A lot of emphasis is put on the characters of people in this show when conflict has happened. I don’t see a lot of acknowledgment on how production creates the environment for these behaviours to occur. When reflections miss that aspect it seems more biased to me.

[@GenXIcon]

At this point, with TWO couples having dated in the past, we need to make room for the possibility that production did it on purpose for the possible content/drama it could create.

[@AustinLEN]

I disagree on the couch scene, I think that's what absolutely tipped the scales from Aaliyah trying to work through everything the best she could to an intolerable situation she had to get out of. Understanding that it's all an edit and that Lydia was effectively under a gag order of course we can now appreciate that Lydia was or may have been having her own catharsis but Aaliyah was robbed of every intimacy she may have had with Uche in that moment. We also now know that Uche is not really worth it anyway and Aaliyah is clearly a Queen who can do better but at the time Aaliyah really seemed to be robbed of an experience and peppered with information that no one wants about a perspective sexual partner outside of a comfortable intimate context. Imagine the gender rolls were reversed, there's no way a man would want another man to download all of that intimate fluff about a woman he hasn't even truly met yet and still feel like he was in the power seat. It seems really hard to speak to Lydia's true intentions so I won't try.

[@regularity2556]

Aaliyah robbed herself of her experience, from the day Uche called her a recent cheater, she should've dropped him and tried to make another connection. Lydia would've been a non entity, instead she stays around for his drama, and then in the real world, he doesn't even like her like that. She wasted her time.

[@regularity2556]

Aaliyah robbed herself of her experience, from the day Uche called her a recent cheater, she should've dropped him and tried to make another connection. Lydia would've been a non entity, instead she stays around for his drama, and then in the real world, he doesn't even like her like that. She wasted her time.

[@steffany3513]

My opinion on Lydia - Aalyiah was shown the evidence Uche had. She said it was pretty damning. But she gave Lydia alot of grace and said she knew Uche did stuff and they were both in the wrong. It was clear Lydia was chasing Uche. I think we see a few times when Lydia thought auche would be the exact same to Lydia as he was with her, and then her being a little taken back with his difference. The reunion really invalidated Aalyiah and it was freaking sad.

[@APerson-qw8yy]

💯

[@ValleyRose21]

I would never speak to or be buddy buddy with someone my man has been inside. I felt for Aliyah when she spoke on how she has certain beliefs.. It’s insane to me how production thought this was ok??? They should have told Aaliyah immediately and not gaslit her into thinking that was all normal behavior. It’s so disrespectful to mess with someone’s reality like that.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

May I ask why you wouldn't be buddy-buddy with your partner's ex lover?

[@ValleyRose21]

@@zacharyjohnson1193it’s way too intimate of a thing to get past. If I were to see a past lover of mine, I’d remember our connection, what they smelled like, how they made me feel, which is unwanted when I’m with someone else now. No man can convince me they don’t do the same. It’s disrespectful in my eyes to welcome energy like that. Hookup culture brainwashes people to think oh it’s just casual blah blah blah but the body, your brain and skin remembers. No thanks.

[@ValleyRose21]

@@zacharyjohnson1193it’s like becoming friends with someone your dad or mom used to fuck. Ew! Hard pass!

[@ravenmadison2114]

I think for Aaliyah the point was that, while she may have been about to learn these things about Uche, she would have learned them FROM Uche and living with him - not from his ex/anyone else who knew him. I don’t buy Lydia saying she was doing this to be a good friend - what does it matter what kind of car he drives or house he lives in if the experiment is to be blind? What does it matter how she and his dog got along? What does it matter if Uche influenced what kind of liquor she drinks? None of those details were for Aaliyah’s benefit . No other woman in the experiment knew these sorts of details that Lydia divulged - by design. IMO, someone in production should have shut down Lydia as soon as she started divulging info. Just like when people are about to find out the ending of a movie, they wouldn’t want someone else running up and telling it moments before they’re supposed to find out. If it’s disappointing to have a movie spoiled, imagine having the entire experience of trying to blindly find your fiancé spoiled.

[@autumnmaddox4059]

yeah it did seem like lydia bulldozed and wanted to seem dominant like oh we had a relationship first, i already know all of this stuff about him you're second fiddle, like it seemed like a very manipulative and backhanded way to dismantle and undermine aaliyahs connection with uche, like im glad she didnt go with him because hes very toxic and judgmental but lyida just put the nail in the coffin on that one

[@pwetty4r4]

When I first watched this I really thought Lydia was diabolical for that, but I kinda understand where she was coming from better. If that was her friend she should have told Aaliyah production be dammed, and she should have respected Aaliyah's boundaries better. Hopefully she grows from this

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

I agree.

[@tanyafeatherstone3303]

Lydia was a messy saboteur

[@CabinFever52]

Fined for not showing up? Brings up the thought---are they being paid for being on the show? I guess I just figured they weren't before. But maybe the actors guild requires it, or something? Anyone have any idea/knowledge about this?

[@Bree5three]

This is all speculation sorry to say but I'm pretty sure I've heard from former stars, people's first gigs on reality tv aren't paid. Maybe a stipend or just the fact that everything you do or need for the show is comped so you aren't massively out of pocket for participating. You start getting paid once they know you're a personality and can bring in an audience for other seasons or projects. I think the fine is just to incentivize you to follow through and not get cold feet because they lose out on way more than their couple hundreds for you, if you're not there to create the episode they get paid thousands/millions for.

[@AliciaAmbrosia]

I love how the doc seems to have no concept of how petty/deceptive people are & yet at the end discusses people impersonating him to exploit his viewers lol

[@BlackSleepingBeauty]

The first half of this video had a bit too many speculations where I was telling you to press play so you can see what happened. It was really hard to stay put when you were not speaking to what they actually said. I think the producers messed up and should’ve recognized the worst case scenarios that unfolded and helped them talk through everything with support.

[@applepie3276]

She shouldn’t have gotten close to Aaliyah to begin with. She’s a snake

[@Aalisrocklist]

The producers behind this are shady af. Truly evil decisions.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

If not evil, irresponsibly indifferent.

[@aimeeyork6319]

I FEEL STUPID EVEN WRITING coz you clearly only read comments from members. And THE MOST DESERVED for $24.99. Sounds like a cult 😕 I'm going to guess that they didn't want Uche there coz he would have taken over, made it the court of law, and talked ad nauseum.

[@zacharyjohnson1193]

Well the rest of us can respond :)

[@stevenalper3890]

7:42 Please get an editor