Manage Self-Contempt in Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

Manage Self-Contempt in Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
Complex Borderline Personality Disorder: How Coexisting Conditions Affect Your BPD and How You Can Gain Emotional Balance. Available at:
shorturl.at/bxB05
Order The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook by Dr. Fox:
In English: goo.gl/LQEgy1
In Spanish: tinyurl.com/55f8tz86
In Polish: tinyurl.com/npzs9f98
Self-contempt causes you to feel alone and conflicted. It also encourages a negative feedback loop that keeps you stuck in place, feeling trapped. When you're in this spiral, you're likely to self-attack and split on your perceptions of self, others, and your world. You can beat self-contempt and in this video I'm going to provide you suggestions on just how to do that.
Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and a multi-award winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 15 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.
He has published several articles in these areas and is the author of:
Complex Borderline Personality Disorder: How Coexisting Conditions Affect Your BPD and How You Can Gain Emotional Balance. Available at:
rb.gy/hdyqyy
Antisocial, Narcissistic, and Borderline Personality Disorders: A New Conceptualization of Development, Reinforcement, Expression, and Treatment. Available at: tinyurl.com/2anv8dww
The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook: An Integrative Program to Understand and Manage Your BPD. Available at: goo.gl/LQEgy1
Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Gold Award Winner): goo.gl/BLRkFy
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Toolbox: 55 Practical Treatment Techniques for Clients, Their Parents & Their Children (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Silver Award Winner):: goo.gl/sZYhym
The Clinician’s Guide to Diagnosis and Treatment of Personality Disorders: goo.gl/ZAVe9v
Dr. Fox has given numerous workshops and seminars on ethics and personality disorders, personality disorders and crime, treatment solutions for treating clients along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum, emotional intelligence, managing mental health within the prison system, and others. Dr. Fox maintains a website of various treatment interventions focused on working with and attenuating the symptomatology related to individuals along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum (www.drdfox.com).
KZbin: / drdanielfox
Dr. Fox’s website: www.drdfox.com/
Dr. Fox’s Blog: www.psychologytoday.com/us/bl...
Facebook: / appliedpsychservices
Twitter: / drdanieljfox1
LinkedIn: / drdfox
Instagram: / drdfox
Amazon Author’s Page: amazon.com/author/drfox
Videos edited by Emil Christopher: [e-mail]
Animation by sirak @sirakoart (IG)
Thank you for your attention and I hope you enjoy my videos and find them helpful and subscribe. I always welcome topic suggestions and comments.

[@happygucci5094]

You hit this out of the park. The way you speak about this disorder is phenomenal and humanizing. You are so accurate with describing our internal processing. Thank you so so much.

[@testecalle3378]

We were gonna talk nicer to ourselves but gonna wait till lunchtime 🥰

[@happygucci5094]

This!

[@dizzynova1896]

"We have to radically accept the choices we made yesterday, where we are today, and influence what we can going forward." I love this Dr. Fox, thank you for the video. Radical acceptance is something I have recently started practicing every morning before my day starts. It's kind of helped me get myself out of self-contempt spirals and feedback loops during the day. At least long enough to get through the work day lol

[@PhoenixRising883]

I love your videos. I've been on a lifelong quest to understand myself better, and have experienced different forms of therapy, rehab, etc. During one stint of IOP, the therapist (Pat) identified self-contempt as ANTS (Automatic Negative Thoughts). Her mantra was "Squish those ANTS!"

[@DrDanielFox]

Thank you for your comments and I wanna encourage you to keep working hard to develop adaptive strategies to push back on those maladaptive beliefs, behaviors, and patterns.

[@jenniferlee5141]

I really needed this today. I forgot about radical acceptance. I can breathe now.

[@Prudenthermit]

Thank you for being a little safe oasis for people w PDs online

[@DrDanielFox]

You’re very welcome and I appreciate your comment.

[@PassionateFlower]

My BPD feels like a riddle I can never solve. I'm in therapy 3 times a week. I'm doing DBT and EMDR. I go for walks. I get sun. I eat fruits and vegetables and get protein. I take vitamins daily. I have empathetic friends. I have family support (debatable but I'm provided housing and I have my own vehicle to go work). My psychiatrist just wrote me a prescription for 2 mg of Abilify. The last time I took medication I ended up getting 5150'd in a psychiatric facility for a week and I swore off meds for the longest time. I'm scared. I thought if I just went to enough talk therapy I could manage. I feel like at least I'm not in a psychiatric facility or experiencing strange medication side effects. Is taking meds really the answer when my family has abused me to the point I'm dependent on their assistance and too depressed to get better? I feel like the baby elephant in the circus who was chained growing up and now as an adult I have invisible chains of bondage. My family says, "Go, work, leave, finish school, be happy, I'm not stopping you." Like as if they didn't just spend the last few decades torturing and manipulating me into guilt trip infused indentured servitude while teaching me no practical life skills in order to individuate and become self sufficient with self agency and self efficacy at an appropriate age during my adolescence? Parents, if you want a child who never leaves or abandons you, then do everything for them while they are growing up, guilt trip them incessantly into spending large amounts of forced happy pretend fun family times together, constantly show them how horrible and terrifying the world is so that your kid is petrified to navigate their own environment without you there controlling - oh wait I mean guiding and protecting - them every step of the way, dress it up with a pretty bow and call it love, then demean and scold your now incompetent and incapable codependent adult child for their apparent ineptitude to spread their wings and leave the nest, and blame that now adult child for their own demise and self sabotaging behaviors so you get off scott free with a built in live in human pet friend who is always there to regulate your emotions for you when you need attention or to give the silent treatment to when you're feeling like doling out a little punishment getting high off the power trip. Say something like oh I don't know how about an old favorite line like, "All I ever wanted was a daughter who isn't rude or disrespect ful to me, and shows a little common courtesy. Now is that really so much to ask for?" Then humiliate them daily for their failure while indulging yourself in having indefinite access to copious amounts of your adult child's time and attention (because you've sufficiently rendered them socially and financially incapacitated by this point in their lives from the years of guilt trips and manipulations). And then encourage them to chemically self lobotomize themselves into a happy numb half dead stupor and slap a personality disorder on your kid and boom - You Will Never Be Abandoned By This Trapped Baby Elephant Turned Adult Invisible Chained Adult Child Of An Abuser Disguised As A Loving (Needy Codependent) Parent. But go on...who's stopping you from leaving and living your life? I took the chains off you years ago...go on. Make something of yourself. Who's holding you back? The past never really existed right? Go on and abandon your poor loving mother and father. All we ever did was raise you and help you in every way despite all your "bad, rude, disrespectful behavior". All we ever wanted was to see you be "happy and successful and not need to depend on us anymore or put up with our perpetual insidious never-ending emotional abuse oh wait I mean our love for you.

[@DonatellaFtGreene]

I don't know you but I am rooting for you. There is a path for you that is your own.

[@gerrieshapiro2147]

Look up gas lighting and watch FREE videos and educate yourself💝💝💝

[@katieg7679]

Hey Miss Roxy, I think you hit the nail on the head in your post, sometimes parents do this to their kids because of their own abandonment fears, whether consciously or unconsciously. Some parents just aren't able to empathize with their kids and have a limited capacity for intimacy, whether they agree with you or not, you can feel it. I know how frustrating and confusing that is, when they are saying one thing but your gut is telling you something is not right, while also still needing the parents that were never there for you. It's a challenging situation to say the least. I think the hard part now is to start validating yourself. Your experience matters and is important. You are not incompetent and you don't need them to survive. You are strong and resilient. Did you have some hiccups along the way? Of course, that would be expected, but that proves nothing about who you are or what you are capable of. Is the world a bit frightening now? Of course, because you have been made to feel like you are incapable and that everyone will treat you like your family. I think you will be pleasantly surprised. I wish you luck :)

[@manytreees]

Wow, this is incredible. The way you wrote that and described what I’ve always felt but couldn’t put a name too. Thank you

[@kerrywhite3483]

@@katieg7679 what a thoughtful and supportive comment ❤

[@Ace-du7vw]

I don’t know why but “what happens is something happens in life - because stuff happens” just made me laugh so hard. What a mood. Thank you for this, and for giving me a laugh when self contempt was trying to make me cry

[@DrDanielFox]

You’re very welcome and I’m glad that you found the video helpful.

[@heatherdonohoue2858]

I really needed to hear this today. I appreciate you taking the time to share your knowledge. Thank you!!

[@SanchoGracie]

42 years old. I'm out of strength, desire or energy to challenge those inner feelings & thoughts. Sad but true. Watching the Depp v. Heard trial has left me shattered. I'm embarrassed enough to have this diagnosis. Now BPD is mainstream & completely stereotyped. It's more than I can handle.

[@LoisPasinella]

Be gentle with yourself, Tracy Lee. We are all broken in some way, but God has left an imprint of His glory on each person! Look at a ‘label’ of BPD as an opportunity to understand what’s going on. Knowledge is power bc we can’t change what we don’t know…but change is possible once we know what the issue is. Being aware and self-reflective are such a gift!! Don’t let these things ‘define’ you, but help you to understand. God will turn this around for good for you, Tracy. You can talk to Him. Here is one of my favorite Scripture verses bc it has proven to be true: “Trust only in God every moment! Tell Him all your troubles and pour out your heart-longings to Him. Believe me when I tell you-He will help you!” (Psalms 62:8, The Passion Translation) I’m praying for you. Keep going! 🙏🏻🕊

[@derrick9635]

I here you ,,I empathise deeply.

[@markobrien4332]

Meditate.. meditate... start with Mooji... taken a year, but it is working for me.

[@evakatz6351]

Hi Tracy, I felt the same- the clinical psychologist that gave evidence was judgemental and dehumanising, and I’m sure others felt that too. I’m hoping maybe this will open up a wider conversation about BDP though?! Please know that these symptoms do not make you a bad person 💕

[@ScrappyKitty15]

I’m right there with you, have BPD too. Sending you so much love right now 💚

[@LoisPasinella]

Dr. Fox, I appreciate so much your practical wisdom and for cheering us on! You make BPD understandable, which helps to alleviate the undercurrent of shame. It’s good to be compassionate towards one’s self, and we can be because God is compassionate towards us. Thank you for sharing your knowledge here on this channel & for your passion to see people recover their dignity & strength!

[@DonatellaFtGreene]

Dr. Fox, thank you so much for this video. It is really helpful. This is so eloquent and clear about how these internal things work in BPD. The loudspeakers at the loudest rock concert are a great metaphor. And your linking of how certain things can set off a chain of self-criticism and fury, reminiscent of what we might have gotten at an earlier time in our lives. I think of that negativity in some ways as "garbage river", a flood of negativity that also includes bad memories. You mention how debilitating that self-contempt can ultimately be, leading a person to think that they can't fight back, looking for safety in a dependent relationship. I liked how you linked splitting - believing that there is a perfect world somewhere - and that it isn't happening for you when there IS no perfect world or perfect relationship which provides "safety". You mention several times radical acceptance of where we are now. Wow, so important. And best of all, you express such hope and optimism for helping with this condition. Kick butt! This was the best. Thank you so much.

dr Fox... urgent... we need your comment on Amber Heard bpd. You are the only person who might give some positivity in this case. Thx!

[@DrDanielFox]

Thank you for the request and I think that you’re right.

@@DrDanielFox Thank you!

[@nitakate10]

I don’t think she’s very well

[@lycheemyusic]

Please this

@@nitakate10 she puts borderline women in very bad position... stigmatising hard

[@sektorify]

Real Mr. Rogers vibe here coupled with tremendous insight and such precise language. I find it soothing, thanks!

[@DrDanielFox]

You're welcome

[@nefwaenre]

Thank you, Dr. Fox. i have always told myself that i'm a good person no matter how much my mom said that i'm a failure, a villain, a bad person etc. But it used to be my grandparents who would tell me they love me, i'm a good person, etc. Ever since i've lost them, i see that i have absolutely hated myself. But now, after 10 years of slowly believing that my mom is right, i'm really a bad person, i have now started to self love and self care. Your videos help a lot. It's so difficult, but slowly and slowly i've realised i'm the only person who loves me. i'm all i've got. So now, everytime i have these negative loops, i keep repeating things that my grandparents used to tell me and imagine as if they're sending to their love to me. IT's very difficult.. but i do it and slowly i've been accepting myself. When i'm absolutely overwhelmed by negative thoughts, which happened recently since i got accepted to my dream university but my loan got rejected thrice. It was and is, devastating to come to terms with that. But i saw that by being mindful, constantly labelling intrusive thoughts and going to a mental safe space has been keeping me sane for now. i can't believe i'm saying this but i actually didn't have any self harming thoughts this time. In fact, i kept saying to myself that it's okay, i'm okay. i hope i'll be okay..

[@kdogW-iw6oq]

One of the most powerful things I learned is that progress is not perfection!

[@DrDanielFox]

Absolutely right. Thanks

[@jspider6185]

Thanks Dr Fox! Right now I have a rare respite from my self contempt around a particular topic and it's so freeing, yet so so tempting to pick the self criticism back up where it left off. It's so weird to actually notice "hey maybe I don't have to be mean to myself, maybe I can choose not to and that will be ok" rather than automatically dismissing that perspective. It's kind of scary - what sort of person will I be if I don't assume that I am bad for doing/feeling/thinking/being?

[@nettle8605]

My feelings exactly!

[@kemdoesitagain]

"hey, maybe I don't have to be mean to myself". Wow! This!

[@jterrellielli7058]

Thank you for this! Finally, unlike many pop arm chair psychotherapists all over KZbin, you regularly provide hope and encouragement. And not scapegoating and condemnation. THANK YOU!

[@mystrose333]

I'm in a 90day DBT day program and we just learned catch it, check it, change it so this video was perfect timing. Thanks Dr. Fox!!

[@DrDanielFox]

I’m so glad to hear that you’re seeking out treatment and that this video was helpful and matched with what you’re learning. I wish you all the best.

[@DD-jm5ug]

I'm exhausted with myself as I keep falling back into lack of self belief, it is holding me back so much in my professional life. BPD is damn hard work 😥

[@aprilpetersen5479]

Oh my! The flood of examples of how I’m toxic and worthless and the internal validation is spot on! Thank you for the reassurance!

[@0DdOne]

Hit me hard when I associated this with NF to a fault. Hate myself, happy, the search… etc. I’d love a reaction to his music from you. You’ve always given great support and encouragement/ understanding and made impact for me.

[@DrDanielFox]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me! I appreciate your support.

[@benlidster9925]

I was assigned male at birth. I am non binary. I have BPD, traits of histrionic personality disorder and dependent..and am neuroduvergent to name a few. I would have one time gave a performance that made Amber look like Mother Teresa and it would have been worthy of an Oscar. I have worked on myself and in therapy and rehab and now DBT. I do not behave like that now and know when I feel like doing so to challenge it. It doesn't run the show my illness half as much as it did. I radically accept life on life's terms now and live a healthily and generally happier life as a result. Namaste

[@ainsleyblack1702]

Fantastic! I loved the radically accept the past part and move on.

[@DrDanielFox]

I’m glad it was helpful for you.

[@lindaburlison2341]

I spiral and decide on taking drastic action because I can’t stand the emotions and discomfort the trigger thing causes in me. Then I watch 3 dr fox videos and feel like a normal in control human being again with rational thoughts and a pause on drastic action. Better than any drug for BPD. I know I’m not the only one that feels this way.

[@DrDanielFox]

Thanks and I’m glad it’s helpful.

[@nadineedmonds2377]

Dr Fox, I found your channel only this weekend and without question, it has been a life saver. This particular video has given me hope; thank you.

[@DrDanielFox]

Welcome and I’m so glad that you find it helpful.

[@thevansickelherps]

YES!!! After a difficult appointment with my therapist today regarding so much self contempt, this hit the nail right on the head! I love how you talk about BPD will tell you that you simply don't have the energy to push back against self-hatred thoughts. This is a phase of my processing I can identify so easily! I know exactly when my brain is slipping into the muted, accepting phase of believing I'm worth every bad descriptor. Thank you for remind me that is a lie! I can push back. One tiny step at a time. Thank you for the incredible resource you are for those of us with BPD.

[@annestrada1724]

Baby steps.

[@nitakate10]

Great advice Dr Fox. Being abandoned by my mum dying when I was 14 and dad taking off had me learning for 30 years. Now my daughter has just left home and I’m an empty nester and feel abandoned all over again. I’m starting to DO things that I like and not to be afraid and dependent. Thankyou 😀

[@DrDanielFox]

Thank you for your comment I’m glad you found the video helpful. I wish you all the best.

[@BBWahoo]

Hugs

[@gorillazgirl2124]

You got this! 🙂

[@Jalentheuntold]

its crazy how you explain what im dealing with now but I didn't understand at the time and trying to explain to my therapist just makes me sounded negative. im hoping to apologize the next time I see her because I dont want her to think im going backwards. but your video was on my recommended so im glad you chose a topic I and others can relate to and this is the first video I was able to sit down and watch in its entirety and understand so thank you!

[@MsRikkiTikki1]

Thank you so much for this video Dr. Fox. I’ve almost completely regressed in my BPD from moving across the country and a very long abusive relationship coming to an end. I pretty much have to start all over and this video gives me so much hope. Thank you so much Dr. Fox 💙

[@SanchoGracie]

Wishing you much luck in your new life & home.

[@khaartoumsings]

I need to study this BPD more. I understand a lot about Narcissism which is similar or encapsulated with BPD with Histrionic PD somehow. One thing I have concluded is that tattoos and piercings seem to be a sign of BPD? Is that true? Who would scar and damage themselves and ironically make themselves look mediocre at the same time? How odd to be so extreme and destructive and yet present ourselves as banal and mediocre in the tattoo banal meaninglessness...Wow. Thanks for highlighting the details of this odd and common mental state ; ) K

[@Xaxtarr_Neonraven]

Thanks! These sound like tactics we can all use to combat fear and self doubt. I realize that it is more of an issue for people suffering with BPD. It is ironic and true that we need to accept ourselves first. Somehow, accepting defeat where surrender was never required only further breaks down interpersonal communication especially if no one knows you gave up. This isn't something for which to be ashamed, but something to be shared, in my opinion. Complete detachment and disconnect is often misunderstood as passive aggression.

[@frigginfrigg8699]

I don’t know why but this made me cry.

[@brooke221]

I’ve realized my own self-hatred is ruining my most cherished relationships. I only ever want to see my loved ones be happy and thrive, it makes me happy to see them happy, and when I see them suffer it’s painful for me. But I tend to hate myself a lot, and any time I do something that annoys them or hurts them and they bring it up to me, I end up completely berating myself, apologizing profusely, telling them that I feel embarrassed and stupid about my own actions and I’ll do better in the future, no matter how big or small of an event this may be, because the worst thing I can imagine is my loved ones suffering BECAUSE of me, I end up feeling like a horrid person. But because I do this, I was told today that my partner feels as though he has to walk on eggshells around me. I don’t know what to do to fix this but it makes me feel absolutely terrible that I caused him to feel that way and having been on the other end, I know it feels awful as well.

[@tanyi003]

Finally, a dr that understands chattering!

[@iamgoddessoflove]

Setting boundaries is so important and healthy, as it sets the tone of our friendships and relationships. 💙KZbinr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships

[@DrDanielFox]

I’m glad that you found the video helpful and I wish you all the best.

[@thenerdgirl1]

I'm so done with my toxic self talk. When it gets going, I stop and say, is this helpful? And if not, I tell it to shut up. Sometimes it's sneakier and builds more slowly and I don't notice it as much. Those moods are hard to shake and move through. But the really nasty talk I tell to take a hike and it's helped.

[@thereisnosanctuary6184]

So how you doing today?

[@brettspohr1]

I really appreciate your insights into alot of the struggles i cope with. I to live in Texas. I would love to make an appointment with you.

[@theredqueen6911]

Just got done with a 6yr double bpd relationship. I was better thru dbt. He stayed very sick. I feel like I have this amazing and scary story to tell

[@Amused_Comfort_Inc]

This one hit me harder than any of your videos so far, and I've been watching for years. Thank you as always Dr. Fox ❤

[@thelittleetherealghost]

You are awesome, Dr Fox- thank you for everything you do. I don’t know where I would be without your work.

[@DrDanielFox]

You are very welcome

[@tawaimusic]

It's so comforting to hear someone describe things at those angles. Thanks 🙏 you're awesome

[@darxhart1646]

Another fantastic video; I needed this today; though, I feel like I say that whenever I see one of your videos. Thank you for your compassion and your guidance, it helps so so much.

[@DrDanielFox]

You are so welcome!

[@levitatestudent]

Dr Fox makes me smile.....catch those thoughts whoosh!

[@renacleerican7824]

So true. It made me cry how accurate are his descriptions of how I feel about me😢

[@DrDanielFox]

I'm so glad this video was helpful for you. I wish you well.

[@renacleerican7824]

@@DrDanielFox Thanks to you Doctor Fox! Your videos are so helpful, smart and positive: It gives me hope! You are obviously helping a lot of us! I am glad I found your channel. God bless you⭐

[@sparklingloveandlight]

I'm having one of these days. Thank you Dr Fox. I'm trying so hard to not self destruct.

[@SanchoGracie]

Talk. We're all listening & likely have been where you are. Let your fellow BPD warriors offer support.

[@annestrada1724]

You can do this. Reach out.

[@meghlajahanmunny5349]

Thanks a lot dr.Fox❤️

[@AvaGrail]

Thank you so much for your work

[@victoriaa.993]

Thank you, I needed to hear this today.

[@matteus8442]

Really good video, as always !!! Thanks for the content 👏🏼

[@lab4389]

Another great video/topic. Thanks! 💯👍🏻

[@bobohobo7652]

thank you. your videos are always so uplifting.

[@suekelsey1329]

Intense selfcontempt is me. My birthday last april 28th was a dissaster. My once a week therapist does the best she can by phone, she is awesome. I have a lot of work to do.

[@yourenough3]

Great video , thanks!!

[@casperclips]

this video saved me today. thank you

[@Ridiculi]

Thank you so much for making these videos.

[@LoriDaFuque]

Timely and precise. Thank you so much Dr Fox

[@TheFoxicle]

Great video. Going to share this with my friends. Love Dr. Fox!

[@kimlr-herring]

Thank you so much, Dr.! I needed to hear everything you said today, today. Thank you.

[@orianaterravecchia3333]

wow that visual really did it for me. this is exactly how it feels

[@hluna9938]

Needed this! Thank you for your videos! they bring me so much hope, I can even express how much they have helped me on my journey. Thank you a million

[@fatma903]

I want to thank you soooo much... For real you explained it perfectly as if you were inside me and describing what happens in there.

[@Jewels_8404]

I get so many notifications the yellow stripe across your thumbnail is really helpful

[@seanmar1738]

Something I have noticed is that the pwBPD in my life asserts that I said things about them that I never said, and I eventually came to realize that the types of things that are being invented are the kinds of things that they say themselves, and I think that for a pwBPD, the negative voice in their head can become the voice of their favorite person (and possibly others) and then it becomes hard to distinguish what the favorite person actually said, and what only happened in their head. I don't think that the negative voice in their head is hardly ever created by some external person, but that it comes from within, and they, more often, attribute that voice to other people and then report it as things that other people actually said.

[@annestrada1724]

Sounds like maybe gaslighting.

[@seanmar1738]

@@annestrada1724 Well, yes, assuming it's intentional, which gets fuzzy when dissociation is involved. It certainly looks and feels exactly the same as gaslighting, which is why a pwBPD can sometimes be accused of being (or even misdiagnosed as) a psychopath or a narcissist. And I think (based on the experience I've decribed) that the apparent tendency for a pwBPD to be romantically attached to narcissists (aka war of the roses) is actually a result of the pwBPD tending to project their own abusive behaviors and attitudes onto others.

[@JohnDoe-sp4nq]

I really needed to hear this today. Thank you

[@spongolongohd9523]

same, started tearing up and crying multiple times

[@heathenrieghosting]

Dr. Fox, your so smart, and awesome.

[@orianaterravecchia3333]

thank u from all of us

[@Edelwiess1066]

Not to be weird but i love Dr. Fox. I mean in a broader sense. But the compassion he shows in making these videos is amazing and like a deep breath of fresh air. Thank you sir for all you do. It is a great kindness.

[@markusmeyer6391]

The only time I could have some sense of self respect throughout my life was when I lost my mind, when I was in psychosis, and thought that I was an angel on a mission. That I was not human, and that I was a being of light blablabla. Now after this experience of psychosis, I live in shame, guilt remorse and self hatred because I've done things in psychosis that have harmed people. And I keep telling myself, if only I did this this way or that way. I'm stuck. Things were really bad before psychosis, now it's at the lowest. I lost motivation and faith in life. I wish I could go back in time, and change my decisions.

[@sallystanford7243]

I Love dr. daniel fox!! You are the first doc that breaks it down with good examples. Thank you.

[@refreshingAnd]

Thank you, Dr. Fox.

[@DrDanielFox]

You're welcome.

[@shoku2725]

Dr Fox thank you for this video

[@DrDanielFox]

You are welcome

[@amber40494]

Wow! This video is amazing

[@DrDanielFox]

Glad you think so!

[@pixieheart9303]

It's Mother's Day and I'm alone and have no joy and nothing to look forward to. Im estranged from my daughter and grandchildren because of BPD. I hate my life and pray for it to be over.

[@lindasharp8523]

Same luv. Hugs x

[@kandyxkat879]

Hello, I just wanted to say I am extremely grateful I found your page. I’m actually crying tears of joy at the moment after watching your videos and finding your book, I haven’t been able to find a doctor who could effectively help me with my complex bpd. I didn’t think there was anything you could do to actually treat it, I thought you could only kind of numb the symptoms,You have given me a lot of hope and I am so thankful for that

[@LurkingLinnet]

THANK YOU SO MUCH

[@keylzuk]

Thank you. When I am going through the overwhelming emotions and I am aware.. I watch your videos. I could be struggling to shower or get motivated to do house chores. I listen to your videos and it provides me with acceptance that yes, this is what I am experiencing but there is hope to get through. Your content and workbooks are helpful. Thank you

[@Farhood]

Thank you 🙏🏼

[@yoria9005]

Thank you so much.

[@DrDanielFox]

You’re welcome ☺️

[@nitakate10]

11pm Western Australia time

[@DrDanielFox]

I hope you enjoy the video in the animation. I’m always trying to make things more interesting while also providing research based and valuable information.

[@nitakate10]

Can’t wait got my timer on 🤗

[@TinTin-ps2lq]

Love from India❤️

[@kdogW-iw6oq]

I have been so blessed to have the therapy I needed. Change is definitely possible. Do you have resources for those that don’t have access to affordable health care in the U.S.?

[@TheDddXXXddd]

Dr Fox is absolutely brilliant and does very important work. I would love him as my psychiatrist Thank you so much for The work that you do!

[@DrDanielFox]

You're very welcome. I'm glad the video was helpful. Be well.

[@grappendix]

so grateful for u

[@susanpinkston3355]

Thanks!

[@DrDanielFox]

You're so welcome and thank you for your kind support of the channel. It means a lot when people help support the cause of putting out honest and research based information. Thank you and be well.

[@tatysilva121]

Could you do a video about attachment styles when you have a bpd diagnosis? Eg : avoidant style with bpd ?

[@AnnieM-aamm]

❤Thank you.

[@cosmicfoxglove1047]

Am I worth it to let go of that self contempt in the first place? I don't know how to take the first step and let go of those negative thoughts as I think they are true. If I let go of self contempt I feel then I will just be believing in lies instead.

[@danielhernandez-fo3mj]

grate video really grate one still my biggest problem and your right its about learning to do it yourself lol its hard very hard and really i hope it gets eazyer soon as really I'm so content as the back burner person my partner has had to perpously force us to be more independent of our own needs as i would always make hm dinner do what he wants to do even now when we spend time alone to much (or when my BPD makes me feel uncomfterbul of the alone time as i feel board and self content come s in ) i tend to go into his room to praise him lol really I'm working onthis but is soooooooooo all i know how to do ...... i feel panic attacks trying to find my own interest cuz I've always done everyone else's interest to keep them here and happy with me ....... i will make it ...( i hope) lol

[@jobunny919]

My problem is, I know the self hate, I see it, I know where it came from, I know it's irrational.... but I STILL feel it deeply in my body. I get physical pain.

[@DrDanielFox]

It's tough when you can rationalize your feelings but still struggle with them. Hang in there, you're not alone.

[@kahlodiego5299]

Sometimes it's not thoughts. It's dissociation and I disappear.

[@myname-uk6oe]

thank u

[@DrDanielFox]

You’re welcome.

[@PONYHEAVEN]

Damn true, so very real.

[@jasminesingh1944]

Thank you for this video Dr.Fox. Can you please make a video on (1)how to be consistent in some work, like I can't maintain a life routine from my childhood.(2)how to enhance ones cognitive skills.Ex: am a student n while studying am not able to focus n sometimes I don't get what I read.N some days are like my mind gets freezed n doing simple work takes a toll on me as I feel as if my brain is jammed.please reply.Thanks in advance.🙂

[@goodtimecoalhauling4726]

My self hate is so bad I hate seeing the dawn. Never have I ever been happy.

[@DrDanielFox]

I’d like to encourage you to challenge it. I know it hard but hard doesn’t mean impossible. Be well.

[@goodtimecoalhauling4726]

@Dr. Daniel Fox I sent you a email asking you about therapy options but have not heard back. None of the therapists in my area either want to say "I don't have BPD" or they don't want to diagnose me as BPD. All I know is after at least 45 years of feeling this way, I am very tired.

[@gorillazgirl2124]

Dr. Fox does your book cover things like this? In your book, do you explain how to achieve that inner sense of security that feels kinda impossible? If so, I will buy it in a heartbeat. I never thought I could manage that and I really want to understand. It'll make my life better.

[@eottoe2001]

Can you talk about how self-contempt is internalized by the child raised by a parent with BPD? And also why is the loving one minutes and out of control the next is such a problem for the psyche of a child raised by a BPD parent?

[@wijfiegroeneandijvie]

the family in the head...yes, perfect description.

[@fatihmehmetcoskun9744]

Sen var yaa müthişsin ağabey

[@Shortkonner]

I do this now on my self talk even jokingly, but my 6 hear old can hear me so it's not actually funny. Self talk goes a very long way.

[@Shortkonner]

Fake it till you make it babe

[@Shortkonner]

Can this video have a part 2 please