r/AmiTheA**Hole For Not Telling My Wife That I'm Dying And Going To Australia Instead?

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[@Ashenicky2009]

Rest in peace first dude, (whenever that time comes cause I have no idea).

[@pagee7452]

You're not being home she's hurt but she's been without money does she know what like to suffer no she doesn't so yeah he has a good and you're right for telling her that too

[@hwiley8141]

For the guy dying. I can sorta understand why he wants to do this. He said that his wife is emotional, and would cry all the time. I understand she is going to be upset, but if she is so upset that it negatively impacts both of them, how does this help ? I dont know if this is the case, but it could be. He knows her best, and if he thinks the vacation is going to be her crying all the time, not much " fun" for either of them. He may have to spend all his time trying to make her feel better, which would suck.

[@capsizemoonz2251]

Blaming the dead i see

[@sandyberger-r9j]

Birthday girl: start to treat yourself well- I‘ve done it for years and usually buy myself something nice like a dress that I wear that day. It makes me feel special all day long even if nobody else remembers.

[@hugdispenser5627]

Yeah

[@kirstenornelas881]

That first story breaks my heart for op and his wife and don't blame him for wanting to have an amazing trip with her prior to telling her but that's such a horrible situation to be in i just can't imagine the pain they will both go through.

[@ilzenelgroenewald9842]

Story 1: I went through my husbands journey in a foreign country without my family. It was not easy without support. Please do not do that to her. I buried him alone.

[@eponymoususer8923]

DEAR GOD! OP doesn’t need lawyers. She needs CPS. Her family is predatory. I hope the parents are held accountable for their bad acts. One more piece of advice: make sure to record yourself every time you report your abuse to an authority figure or do it in a verifiable text format like email.

[@Gloria-ro4vn]

How dare OP cut her hair; she cut off her parents (parasites) meal ticket; what in heaven are they going to do. I know, GET A JOB

[@thegoodkelly]

The husband should have filled every room with pink roses before taking her out to a top notch restaurant for dinner, and coming home to a gift box containing a nice piece of gold jewelry and a bottle of champagne.

[@ashlandbrooks8140]

I understand where the first guy is coming from, but I wouldn’t hide it from my spouse. If I was ever in his situation I’d need some time to process it for myself before telling them, but I wouldn’t wait till the last minute.

[@susanlayton2143]

My son's birthday is Christmas Eve (when our family has always had our family Christmas celebration) but we have done our best for 21 years to acknowledge and celebrate his birthday too. This made me want to cry hearing how sad OP sound knowing that no one, not even her husband, even acknowledges her birthday.

[@lisemartino1995]

My sister’s birthday is a year and a day after mine. My mother (divorced parents) would celebrate HERS, often on MY birthday - I totally understand. PLEASE do something for your own birthday - make a spa date, buy yourself something nice, treat yourself and acknowledge that you are special.

[@lianabaddley8217]

​@@lisemartino1995 my youngest brother has 2 daughters like this! They got induced for the second the day before. They have always made sure that each gets celebrated on their Day. They have chosen to have a shared Friend party but that was their choice.

[@toyairy7612]

the birthday one. have you told your husband the history of your non birthdays? if not tell him that and then carry on with a year of not acknowledging his special days. I am the oldest of 11 and not one of the favorites, so i can count christmases where i was totally forgotten or barely noticed and my birthday is near christmas so as i got older i started realizing i was seriously shortchanged. My dad didn't know. in the mounds of gifts he didn't realize that i had a meager pile of garage sales finds and rewrapped toys. My mom always told me my dad told her to short me because as the oldest i would understand financials and they could save money ignoring me. My mother inlaw is another bad gifts from spouse catagory. her husband gave her a broom one year. for him he thought it was thoughtful because he broom was in poor shape and he knew she really wanted a new one....but not for her birthday. He was a very frugal farmer who really didn't know better and she never told him. I saw this and told my husband "don't get me house wife gifts, i know we are broke but you can get me my favorite candybar or a cheap pair of earrings" something so i know he thought carefully about my day. we were married 40 years when he was surprised that i would accept a 400 dollar mixer instead of a ruby necklace this year because it would be simply amazing....he's very confused now.

[@ceridwen04]

I share my birthday with my mother's cousin. They grew up close as sisters so we are all very close. It was never an issue, but it became a tradition to call each other every birthday or celebrate together. There are NO reasons to just celebrate one and forget the other.

[@wellthiswasfun]

I totally understand the birthday one. Last year i was already feeling forgotten by my family and my now ex (who had previously done enough for my birthday) really dropped the ball. I ended up crying to him that it wasn't about the gifts, a nice card would've been fine, I just wanted to be thought about. I think he went over the top on valentine's day to make up for it.

[@goldfishy._.]

Happy Birthday! Whenever it is/was I hope it's a great one :)

[@keepdancingmaria]

To the mom with the sons 6 months apart.... There was a reason you were no contact with your family before. Don't trust them. Tell them, they are both my sons. If I hear any more of this, I'm no contact again. Period.

[@aletakey3600]

OP is an adult!!! The Police had no problem with the fact that she had her own place! Everyone can butt out & mind their own business. OP should go to the school board or get a lawyer to tell them to cease & desist!!

[@jraxreviewsxcosplayxmore6934]

Aww the birthday one had me crying sad tears then happy tears. I now I’m a few months late, but happy birthday Lucivaryas! Also the uncles birthday meaning more...I was born on March 22, 3 days after my grandfather who chose my name passed away. My aunts granddaughter was born on March 22 16 years later and my aunt still celebrates both birthdays!

[@hugdispenser5627]

Tbh I’m just coming across this video. But yeah. My I was born around Eid (a Muslim yearly celebration). And tho I’m not a practicing Muslim now (my family doesn’t know) Al my childhood I had my cake. We would get together for Eid and my mom’s aunt (bless her heart she’s always thinking of others) always made sure I have a cake. Last time I was there during Eid my uncle’s wife made sure to bring the cake (I believe my mom’s aunt was traveling at the time). And when I’m not there (during the pandemic and there was one in 2018 we couldn’t travel, that my grandma called me to say happy Eid and to wish me a happy birthday. It often makes me cry cause my paternal grandma’s last Eid was the one I turned 12 during. She died later that year. It’s been 6 years without her and so a simple happy birthday meant so much. (Eid is also a day in a different calendar)

[@hearshotkid33]

woo March 22! hi, birthday buddy!

[@toyairy7612]

The OP in trouble for finding their friend and encouraging her to communicate that she is safe to LE has a very good case for suing so many people and coming out with a settlement. I am rabidly against frivolous lawsuits that exploit the courts to get money but in this case i am livid. I presume this is a minor and THEY are being exploited for a family matter that no public establishment should be officially involved in. THEY need to be taught a lesson so it never happens again. Kudos to LE for staying within the law. The school and townspeople should be asking themselves why LE isn't revealing her location and why they didn't drag her home against her will. OP is a hero in this story it sounds like that family is habitually emotionally abusive and they are all joining in.

[@miriehr5993]

For the guy hiding his gfs beauty products??? How dare he. "She's already the most beautiful woman i know and has the most perfect skin all over her body" if he listened and took interest in her passion, which she's making into a career, he would know that she probably has perfect skin because there's a reason to each product she uses. Also, skin care can help preserve the youth of the skin, so by his standards, she would continue to be beautiful longer. If he wants to put a ring on it, he should not only pay more attention, but maybe engage with her interests for once. Dude, the men only have the audacity fr

[@everymoviehero9248]

I'm a burn survivor, a few years back in a burn support group a little 5 year old wanted just enough christmas cards to fill a card tree, she received over 200,000 cards

[@mrswaypurdysixx]

My birthday is literally Christmas day. My family have always made sure to celebrate both on the same day or Christmas eve depending on what I decided. As a kid I also had parties in the summer to celebrate with friends. Even if money is tight it is not hard to acknowledge someone's birthday and celebrate with then even if you can't afford to buy or do alot..

[@jessicascoullar3737]

My sister and I both have birthdays three weeks from Christmas on either side. We got the “this is your birthday and Christmas present” but since we both got it, it wasn’t an issue, and we usually got one expensive present rather than two small ones. But it could definitely have caused jealousy if one of us had been born in July and ended up with two presents.

[@kristinwiebold2433]

OP NTA. Wife treated Sarah like crap and never apologized, never cared about her relationship with sarah so she doesn't get to see baby. Especially if sarah says no. If OP goes behind Sarah's back, op will be just as bad as the wife

[@eponymoususer8923]

The OP is a parent. She’s doing the right thing by her children. The baggage that the children will have to deal with can be largely put off until later, when the boys are more equipped to handle it. Letting the family know makes the children more vulnerable to damage the OP has already decided is bad for them. The birth certificate is amended upon adoption to reflect the new parent(s). No one can get this information without extensive and expensive legal assistance. The mom is hung up on it because she is selfish, exploitative, and entitled. Mom needs zero contact with these boys or their mother.

[@mbyerly9680]

It sounds like the OP's wife's "Money doesn't matter" really means the exact opposite. She thinks he shouldn't splurge on a better watch.

[@mbyerly9680]

@Kayla Wise Lack of money is the root of most misery and crime.

[@animeguykurosaki1]

My cousin and my grandmother share the same day for their birthday, and you know what? We always made sure both enjoyed their birthdays each.

[@cheallaigh]

for the dying guy... what i would have done with his view... go to oz, spend time there, but don't leave it till the chances are high you might die there, don't take that chance... go back home and then tell her, if you felt she would have been too upset to enjoy it. i got his need to want them to have, especially her, untainted memories before he becomes overcome. he wasn't doing it out of malice, and while it was somewhat selfish, he wasn't trying to be an AH, he was trying to give her something to hold onto at least for a while after he passes.

[@RockLikeAStone]

If someone was claiming I was sexually harassing them I would never let them in my house for my protection

[@andyacidsquid5928]

The one with the ex wife credit fraud pisses me off. If it was the other way around, no one would call her the ahole.

[@kaitohkid7229]

Story 2: don't celebrate HIS birthday at all. If he complains get him a present which is for you. Only you.

[@Khaisz.]

55:00 The grandmother is making it an issue because she probably want to know who the golden child / favourite child should be.

[@cu-8190]

about the birthday story, I share a birthday with my aunt and it's also in December, so it is pretty much overshadowed by christmas, but my family, despite being lower income immigrants where I live, have always cared a lot about my birthday and while I don't really celebrate my birthdays anymore now that I am almost in my mid twenties I am so thankful that my family always paid attention. birthday celebrations don't need to be huge but acknowledgement and appreciation goes a long way

[@lianabaddley8217]

My oldest sister's BF has a birthday close or on Christmas (been a while since we were young I can't remember). She hardly ever got a separate birthday party/gift. Seeing that, my older (2 older 2 younger sisters) has 2 daughters that were born in Dec after Christmas. She has always made sure that they get all the birthday celebrations they deserve. Every year! One is the 26th one is the 31st.

[@Kai-uj5go]

It's bananas that dude is mad because his gf or wife is making double what he makes for doing less hourly work. Unless he is paying her salary/is her direct manager who is setting her schedule, which neither is the case, he has no right to say she's lazy, it's just him being salty that he isn't earning as well even though he is putting in more actual hours.

[@crumbsburner250]

Nah he’s definitely jealous but I see his point. If I was working my ass off 9+ hrs a day and I come home and see my girl barely doing shit and getting double my pay I would definitely be salty😂. But I would also be looking for a better job at the same time🤷🏾

[@jodycotton9454]

I have 5 grown children and each of them were so happy that they have a niece or nephew who has a birthday either the day before or after theirs. My oldest daughter’s birthday is October 28 so I’m wishing you a belated happy birthday here!

[@MariMotherofGoblins]

I'm glad the op who was so sick told the wife. I'm sure it was hard, but then she had the chance to make the absolute most of their time together, or let things go, or forgive eachother for things with grace.

[@eponymoususer8923]

I wish more people understood how significant recognition of birthdays is. As a culture, we’ve made many people feel invisible, and for many of those people, that feeling is intolerable… it feels pointless on an existential level… “Why am I even here if I’m insignificant?” This is the core of much of the current depression/anxiety/personality disorder epidemic. When people are seen and feel significant, they can be happy with much less, work harder, and still enjoy life more than much more privileged people who feel invisible and insignificant.

[@aletakey3600]

About the couole that work from home in tech: Does the girlfriend have more certifications than her boyfriend? He should ask her how she got where she is now. He could try get the same training and work towards where she is. There is all kinds of on line training. If she got there thru applying for jobs that pointed her in the job she has now he should start looking for jobs in that path. Definitely TA. Ask her!

[@dannyroosenboom3640]

by not revealing wich child is the natural son, garantees that they are equaly loved by the family

[@Mouthymensch]

The birthday one really got to me. I’m a twin and my sister was the one who always had friends growing up and I didn’t so hers was celebrated more than mine. It was just more celebrated for her then me. Mom was too busy emotionally abusing me to celebrate and my dad died when I was young so no acknowledgment on that end. Also back in elementary school, one of my sisters friends gave me a gift and then took it away at the end of the day.

[@eponymoususer8923]

What a beautiful, sweet man. Markee, I normally agree with every assessment you make, but you’re wrong on this one. If you’ve ever lived a life where impending doom is a constant dark specter, you realize what a gift secrecy is. His choice was not whether to cause his wife pain, but what sort of pain he would give her and how long she would have to suffer. OP seemed to have all his ducks in a row and didn’t leave much for his wife to do. I’d rather he take the secret approach if I was his spouse. It would allow me to fully enjoy the remaining time with my loved one. The pain will happen no matter what. No need to suffer longer or more.

[@lisemartino1995]

The “twins” are yours, no issue beyond that. They are fraternal twins, chromosomes are a medical issue! Different mother? Different father? They are brothers. PLEASE protect them from anyone who wants to divide them.

[@jelestra]

The man frustrated with his GF's job: I've heard this story from the GF's perspective somewhere during the past few days. According to her, he threw a fit after she got a migraine and took a 2 hr nap in the middle of the day. (I make a playlist of random r/ vids and listen while I'm doing other stuff, so can't even guess which channel I might have heard it from) It's always interesting to me when we can get a story from both sides - even of the verdicts are pretty much the same.

[@eponymoususer8923]

The OP that’s upset his wife feels money is unimportant: It looks like OP does believe money is important. He may feel guilty that his wife is less materialistic than he is. He also may feel she devalues the lifestyle he’s proud of having provided. If money isn’t important, the work he does to get it isn’t important either. He may be struggling with his own worth when she raises this point.

[@ladytenor9876]

The ignored birthday OP's story made me cry. 🌈🇦🇺 Happy belated or, better, early birthday Markee 🎁🎂🍧

[@eri-chan1943]

Hi, I just wanted to say I really appreciate you paying to be a member for Markee. This guy is a really good chill creator and it's nice to know I'm not the only one who thinks that.

[@katieb.1184]

here's the thing. if the family pushes THIS MUCH about knowing who is the bio child right now... what actual reasons are there? there's almost none. and let's be honest, that grandma is gonna be an assssssss to her non-bio grandkid

[@sharolynwells]

When my daughter was young, my mom would celebrate Meg's and my nephew's birthday together (Meg's is the 10th; Chris' is the 22nd). Then one year, my mom's oldest brother came for a visit along with his stepdaughter and their son (yes, you read that right). Norma's and Stanley's birthdays are the 15th and 28th, respectively. Mom bought a cake with Meg's, Chris', Norma's and Stan's name on the cake. I never resented Chris and Meg celebrating together, but to add Norma and Stan to it made me angry. From then on, we would have a picnic and celebration at the lake.

[@lianabaddley8217]

Growing up my Dad was out of town for two weeks almost every year around my Birthday. I grew up with 4 sisters and 2 brothers. So when my Dad was out of town my Mom was overwhelmed with trying to keep up with all the kids. Everyone would forget my birthday. I started counting down and would remind everyone the 20th of every month. I taught my hubby and my 3 kids that My Birthday is the most important day of the year. They are not supposed to work and have to see me. I don't care if I get anything except a freaking Happy Birthday Mom! And a Hug. My kids have included all their SO's. It's really sweet that they tell their boyfriends sorry can't go out/vacation (summer b-day) it's my Mom's birthday. I still count down. I remember All other birthdays and remind Hubby When his Mom's (etc) birthday comes around. He is only responsible for remembering mine. Sometimes he'll forget that it's his but will never forget mine. My parents and siblings still occasionally will even with all the reminding. I Love All my Hugs every Year !

[@robint3547]

Making sweet memories before you go......or both of you living in hell waiting for dooms day? She will be mad but will love you all the more....and she does need to know now. rather than later . Yes it is a confusing time. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

[@lorifiedler13]

Forgotten birthday. Time to celebrate at your half birthday. Gather your friends and go to an amusement park or something. SEND YOURSELF FLOWERS AND CHOCOLATES.

[@staylor3483]

1story: this is the most profound story I've ever heard here. Someone once said, "Nobody has an expiration date stamped on the bottom of their foot." That said, we all know that our time will come. 😢

[@Fred100159]

Birthday wishes I feel for OP. I know exactly where you are coming from. My baby brother's birthday is the day before mine - but 13 years apart. On his first birthday, we each had cake on our respective day. Next 2 years, we shared a cake on MY birthday - the cake read "Happy B-Day, me and brother" Next year, we shared a cake on HIS birthday - "Happy B-Day, brother and me" Next year it was a cake on brother's birthday - "Happy B-Day, brother" Never had a cake with MY name on it after that. Brother and other Siblings all got a cake into their 40's and 50's, stopping only after both parents had passed away. Siblings still wonder why I don't do 'Birthdays' and only send a text at most. Because they can't be bothered to notice that NOBODY celebrated MY birthday.... only THEIRS.

[@eponymoususer8923]

As a parent, you have a greater responsibility to your children than to your spouse, simply due to the nature of the relationships, no matter how old your child is. It’s so unfortunate OP had to make the choice between his spouse and his child. It must confuse Sara horribly that OP chooses to stay with someone who abused and neglected her child.

[@lisemartino1995]

The wife who says “money doesn’t matter” should do something philanthropic, like sponsor a child in poverty, set up a micro loan fund, set up a charity fund for a women’s rescue centre. Help someone ELSE to get a head start in life.

[@smarieisme8009]

NEVER SIGN ANY CONTRACT THAT GIVES ANYONE DICTATION OVER YOUR BODY, MIND, OR LIFE! Your parents have screwed you over by putting that kind of pressure on you! They better hope they didn't spend money they were not responsible for earning. They used you and the moment you can get away from them, do it! Run and never look back!

[@susanminer2088]

Seems that if the family want to know which child is biologically yours. They will treat your sons differently, and it will devastate him. Also, their dad is a jackass.

[@jaggirl]

RIP....whenever that may be. Yes, you should tell your wife. You both need to make more memories soon..

[@staylor3483]

Daughter's Address: the mother disowned her daughter bc she got married!! Now, she is insisting on seeing the disowned baby?? Hey, Mom-of-Year.. get this thru your thick skull -- you can't have it both ways!! If you hadn't disowned your daughter, you would be a grandma. BUT, YOU NO LONGER HAVE A DAUGHTER! THUS YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO THE BABY!! Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. OP is not the AH!! It is up to the daughter who gets her address & can see the baby!! Good on you, OP, for protecting this young lady!!

[@animeguykurosaki1]

"Money doesn't buy happiness" It originally referred to people who had money but were not happy, but giving their money to others did seem to make them happy. I don't know how true this is but I like this version than the version rich people spout to people who are homeless and can't eat more than 1 meal a day, if they can even get that much.

[@purplebunn]

Abby needed attention yes, but so did OP who was also their child. It's difficult to take care of a child with terminal illness but that doesn't mean you get to abandon the other kid. Plus, Abby and OP didn't get to have Abby's time together

[@josephbrown9665]

I had brain cancer. And I was coaching my youngest daughter in softball and I died on the field. Emt’s were able too get my heart going and breathing again before we got to the hospital. When I came around the doctor give me a pile of medicine to keep me from having seizures. My kids were moved in the hallway and my wife and I were told that I would probably die with my next seizure. I ended finding a doctor who was willing to do my surgery and give me a chance to live on too see my children grow up. My son knew that I had cancer when he was kicked out of the room with his siblings. He was heartbroken I had just married his mother after 13 years apart and he had never seen us so happy. I was pretty drugged up for the next couple weeks seeing doctors every day to find one that would help me. I went the last day of my son’s baseball tournament to see him play. I started feeling funny when we were driving back home. I told my wife to get me to the hospital as fast as possible. She saw the sign on the the highway and she got off for the local charity hospital and she pulled up to the ER and my son jumped out and went to get someone to come help me I was not able too talk or move. They were able too quickly stop the seizure that started shutting down my body. The kid doctor that was sitting next to me when I came to was smiling and my wife and boys were all crying. She went to say something to me and the doctor started talking to me asking me if I understood what he was saying. I was actually able too talk again. So he told me that I had a 50/50 chance of living with him doing the surgery. He said that he would be doing the surgery on the next morning. They were going home in a few and I was going under for the night and he would wake me up in the morning. We did some paperwork and everyone kissed me and I woke up the next morning in the operating room. He said that I would not be able to talk but one blink for yes and two for no . I didn’t understand that he had my head open when he was talking to me. 7 hour surgery and he knocked me out again. He was in my face later in the afternoon and He said that he was able too get it all. Gotta blink you remember how to answer me huh? He asked me if he could take my wife out. Two blinks lol by him . He said do I want to see her and my kids single blink. He said let’s get the tubes out and let them in. Nurse started to untalented the mask and tube. He said take a deep breath and and blink and he will start to remove it and I slowly let out my breath. It was out and I was coughing. He patted me and said he was going to get them. They came in the room and I started crying. All my kids were there. I just said that I was sorry they started laughing at me . I told them I didn’t think I would see them again. Then I found out that I was not saying anything I just thought I was saying it. This went on for a couple minutes and I started writing it down for them. My brain just needed a reboot. We found out that they had a hurricane in the Gulf of Mexico and it was coming to the city were we were. My wife said that she was going to get me released with a nurse coming to the house and I could go to the hospital for chemotherapy in the morning but after the storm hits. I freaked out when I moved my head it still had air in it from the surgery for the week when I was sent back home. I used a Walker and I was none verbal for a couple months until I figured it out. Took me a year to get back to normal but I still had small seizures and wasn’t able too drive. Two teenagers who were more than willing to drive me around and just be able to drive.

[@RockLikeAStone]

For the mother of Clark and Kent. No one ever needs to know which is your bio vs adopted unless they want to know one day. If it’s not an issue they wouldn’t need to know and wouldn’t view them any different. They will 💯 treat the bio with favoritism

[@julias2855]

Husband told me when dating he hated Valentines Day. We agreed to not celebrate. Birthdays r big deal so I have birthday month. He does not like celebrating so I don’t do it big. I just let him win in arguments that month. Lol. We celebrate wedding & proposal anniversary. Now he does Valentines big because I guess he saw I liked it when friends did something for me.

[@WhitneyDahlin]

The gender reveal one. His wife just assumed he was going to go along with a very expensive gender reveal video so I don't think she can be mad at him for assuming that they wouldn't be doing that again. But the husband knew how much this meant to her and she might not have known how much he didn't want to do another expensive movie for the gender reveal. So that's where he becomes TA. He immediately jumped to the nuclear option instead of speaking with her. he should care about his wife's feelings enough and since they have two children you think they're communication would be good enough that they could have just disgusted. When you saw her working on it he could have just told her hey we can't really afford that and not only is it a lot of money it's a lot of time and stress on us I do want to celebrate this baby with you but can we find some other way to do it. He should have communicated with her and she should have been communicated with him so esh

[@RockLikeAStone]

Parents managing their children’s careers when they have less than zero experience is just a more agreeable way to say their riding your coattails.

[@staylor3483]

Birthday Story: Petty me would 1. Dump the hubby who refuses to put you first. 2. Send a simple bleak card out to all my family that stated right on the envelope not to open it until your birth date. Upon opening the card (blank front) would simply say on the inside, "I exist!" And signed, "the one forgotten. " Of course with no return address. See who can put 2 & 2 together. 😊 But hey, I am just that petty. Sweet, put yourself first!!😊

[@RockLikeAStone]

I don’t think I need permission to eat at any restaurant at all regardless of price. He didn’t have to go. And if I were married I still wouldn’t need permission to spend money I make. It is also a unilateral decision for the dad to say no. Everyone saying “it’s their money not just hers”, he doesn’t work! This is why finances should be separate and why more and more people are getting prenups

[@julias2855]

“Her racist bed” 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣

[@ladytenor9876]

Being capable of having children does not mean they should have children. The beleaguered husband of a convicted felon is not being a jerk in any way.

[@frogsquared7867]

yeah for the birthday one its completely unacceptable!! my mothers birthday and mine are 4 days apart, but we still get gifts from eachother and our families. sometimes my mothers birthday falls on fathers day. what do we do? we move fathers day to the next week. mom comes first!!

[@lianabaddley8217]

My Hubby never cares when it's My Birthday (June 20th) and not Father's Day. He will get a Happy Father's Day hug. But always after My Happy Birthday hugs. It's odd I've had to "share" like 3-4 times in the almost 30 years we've been together. Leap years can make things weird.

[@kristinewatson3702]

JeSUS! How hard is it to spend 3 bucks on a birthday card. Husband ITA

[@kristinwiebold2433]

I don't like the Comment that says Mormons would act as atrocious like those people who were harassing OP. Mormons don't do that. Anyways op NTA. You did the right thing. And I agree that you should talk to a lawyer and school district. You shouldn't have been punished. It is also creepy that parents would want to put devices on their kids The people who were harassing OP and OP's friend are weirdos and if needed friend should tell cops what people are threatening to come to her place and making her feel unsafe.

[@DarkDreamsAndMoonlitNights]

For the last commenter on the first OP, how beautiful you wrote. We do live in great times, all things considered.

[@deby8136]

A simple happy birthday goes so far. I am a twin and have always had to share my birthday which I dont mind but when we got adopted my adopted mother would have birthday parties for my twin and everyone forgot it was my birthday too. (I never got along with her) It was always painful to me. Now we are both grown and enjoy having birthday parties together and I always ask for a card for my birthday. I have also saved every card I have ever gotten. My sister was always trying to tell people it was my birthday too and she is a great person and would make me cards when we were young and always still buys me a card every birthday. While others might forget my birthday my twin never will. I hope your husband will realize that just because other people have birthdays on or around yours does not make your birthday any less important. Hopefully he will take the time to show you how much he appreciates you and at least gets you a card.

[@lisemartino1995]

Model with a haircut… yes, it’s breach of contract, but….. there are so many things you can do in order to keep working. Breaking the contract in this case means that the company has recourse to not find the amount / number of castings previously agreed…. Nothing more. Having worked with a modelling agency, a good agency will still find you work, they will just be aware of your past….. like any other job would….. but your skill can overcome this

[@amybakerfreudigman6576]

We went the old fashioned way, didn't find out the gender until the baby was born. People got to have a lottery over what they thought we'd have etc. Different kind of gender reveal, didn't cost a dime, lol.

[@lorifiedler13]

Clark & Kent. If it hasn't already been done. Adopt the nonbio son. Then, they are both yours.

[@cynicalminion]

title story: you need to tell her what's up, but wanting to just go to australia doesn't make you the a-hole, either. i'd say go for the not-as-happy-as-anybody-would-like medium of giving her the heads-up about the health update, but advocate for a "i just want us to go and have fun. we'll worry about this AFTER the trip" stance on it.

[@___LC___]

For the teen getting suspended… yeah, THAT happened!

[@mog-gyveroneill2500]

1st: bless him for thinking of his beloved wife whilst dying! No need for a BBQ, it's so hot (UK), the prawns will cook just out on a plate! Edit: Ignored Birthday Girl. She is a sweetheart. Her husband is not!! My birthday is New Year's Eve...yeah, I'm mostly an afterthought, but at least there's always celebrations! 37:05 what the hell is this lovely man doing with a with a witch of a woman?!

[@staylor3483]

"Comfortable" story: dad stays home while mom works & supports the family. Sounds like dad is jealous that he's not the bread winner. Mom needs to tell dad to get a job & contribute!! This way he will have money & a sense of accomplishment.. 😊

[@ChinchillaQueen]

This is why I am grateful my parents never combined birthday with Christmas for me. I might not have ever had big birthday parties but with birthday being six days before Christmas, people were on vacation. Now the current situation regarding that is partly my own doing but it does get really expensive around birthday and Christmas now that we added a wedding anniversary on Christmas Eve. We combine for that reason. All I ask is that birthday is acknowledged. Same for him.

[@reneedominguez3633]

My Father's birthday was December 16th. He said that when he was growing up he was always told, " You aren't getting much for your birthday, but we are planning a big Christmas!" He never got his "Big Christmas " One year for his birthday, I had all the grands and great grands send him a card with a couple of dollars saying, " I know this isn't much, but we are planning a "big Christmas!" He laughed for days afterward!

[@ChinchillaQueen]

@@reneedominguez3633 no way! My great grandfather's birthday was December 16th! Anniversary was December 14th but it made for a fun December with all the important days

[@lucyann1573]

Mmkay so the last comment on that first has me weeping. Beautifully said, Askmeaboutmybeergut. I'm gonna go hug my son. Also, poor OP in the second story that's so sad. She's surrounded by Aholes

[@ashleyjudd9741]

wow i am the youngest in a family of 8 and no matter what we celebrated everyone's birthday even if it was just a happy birthday and a cake or cupcakes and our birth days are with in 2-3 weeks of each other starting may 4-july 17

[@arleneroberts8886]

Don’t give her the address, her daughter’s choice

[@arleneroberts8886]

The mom did that

[@stacys8729]

Ha! I love the reference to how incredibly stupid koalas are. No hate though, they make up for it by being insanely adorable. / Restaurant - The kid is right - Mom works for the money, they're rich so wasnt a huge dent in money, the mom doesn't need to 'ask' her husband if she can go to a restaurant with their daugher. If he didn't want to go, then he shouldn't have gone and ruined it - and made it more expensive on top of it all. I really hate when people go to things to just complain and ruin it for everyone else.

[@jeanthree]

I keep my finances separate from my husband as well. I don't need his permission to buy a car since I have own money I even bought a house without him I have my own buying power

[@TheAceWolfe01]

Who the fluff cares which child is the biological child? Biology has nothing to do with parenting!

[@nomadicmomma2048]

For the first time Markee, I disagree with you. As someone who has had more. Than one person in my life die of a known illness; all have said they wished they hadn't spoken to friends/family so quickly. This is happening to OP. OP needs to take time to process his grief. People around OP are not going to be able to hide their grief. OP needs time to prepare himself first, before he is made to take on the grief of the ones he will leave behind. IMHO

[@tammygrubbs3258]

I was born on my mother's birthday and then when I turned 17 my cousin was born on our birthday. So, I have no day for me either. We celebrate my mom because it was her day first and we celebrate my cousin because she is the so young. I haven't had a cake since I turned 4.

[@lianabaddley8217]

Ahhh man that sucks I am so sorry! My day was always forgotten. Then I had a REALLY annoying cousin born the day after. I still hate that. I taught my Hubby and 3 kids that My Birthday is the most important day of the year! They always remember the Happy Birthday Mom! The only thing they Have to get me is a Big Hug!

[@julias2855]

If I was dying, I would not tell my husband. He would worry & be so sad. If it was him, I would like to know. So. Hard one. I would tell him after vacation. But I know his biggest fear is losing me. Not to another man if that’s my choice. But losing me, if I want to stay with him.

[@Frazzled_Chameleon]

Like, do people not know how to read? The dad literally just listed all the reasons he's moving with the kids and said he wouldn't keep their mom from them. Yet people are all hung up on the "You're using your kids as a weapon to hurt your wiiiiiiiiifffffe!" This is what happens when y'all give participation medals to every Tom, Dick, and Harry instead of reality checks. They grow up lacking reading and comprehension skills. "Chocolate never lets you down"? Y'all have clearly never heard of durian chocolate.

[@summerdais325]

14:25 Wish I knew who you were. I would feel honored to send you a card and small gift just to celebrate your life. I don't have much. I literally live way below the poverty line due to disability, but how I understand having an invisible birthday. It didn'thelp that growingup my sister's birthday was celebrated every year at a huge 4th of July blowout (not thrown by my parents), whilst mine was usually mostly ignored due to it frequently lining up with my dad's extended guard duty (2 week or guard weekend). I haven't ever had a party, and I have received few cards or gifts, especially as an adult. That said, I remember fondly the ones I did. Even Facebook birthday wishes touched me deeply!!

[@jodycotton9454]

In the hospital right after giving birth to my youngest daughter (29 at the end of March) I was told I have less than 10 years to live. I had 3 young children at home already. She’s married and has 3 beautiful children. Doctors don’t know everything and for me God has the final word. I’ll be 59 the week after my daughter’s birthday. Praying for you and your wife OP.

[@staylor3483]

Modeling story: OP needs to directly contact the agency she had been working thru & ask them for assistance w/ getting new management & legal representation outside her parents. With her parents telling her that the money SHE earned modeling not being hers, there is a huge problem!! If this is the US, there are laws in force that would require the parents to set aside a large chunk of money for the child while taking a percentage of the earnings as a salary. What appears to have happened here is that the parents fired their child from them being the managers & canceled any contract with the modeling agency on the child's behalf. Unfortunately, she is going to have to sue her parents for monies stolen & mismanagement. This could possibly be done thru the modeling agency if they value her previous & potential work. Good luck.. Sorry you have gold diggers for parents & they screwed you!! With the family's, ie aunt, jumping on the band wagon, it sounds like your parents are funding family members on your dime. Disgraceful!!

[@sandyr-w6906]

12:52 OMG, that was my uncles B-day and my babys due date (13 years ago), But child decided didnt want to share special day and came early.

[@driversuz44]

Racism sucks. Cancel Culture sucks. However there were two very good reasons to report this racist to her employer: 1. The racist was committing a crime by making threats, indicating that she would likely be willing to commit more crimes and cause objectively measurable harm. 2. The employer has made it public knowledge that it would want such information about one of its employees. This is not a case of a spiteful troublemaker approaching a company and (implicitly or explicitly) threatening to smear them because one of their employees might be committing Wrongthink. This is the case of a real victim proactively protecting herself, and possibly others. This is a case that an employer would likely have taken seriously long before Cancel Culture.

[@maryharvey6909]

If your birthday is important to you, and you’ve told your husband, and he laughed about a card, then I would try again. No pouting, just calmly tell him it’s important to me that you think about my birthday. And you guys decide what you’re gonna do. My husband and I always worked shift work, And we did not care about birthdays really for us. So we decided to do something that doesn’t cost anything (if you know what I mean) we always did our kids birthday. Sometimes bigger sometimes an envelope with money. But they are all grown now which is odd to me about your birthdays. We thought stop the birthday is around age 20. But I always do them when a kid is a kid up until that point. And they cut your presents out when you were a kid and they gave you one when you’re 18. Wow.

[@mog-gyveroneill2500]

Am I the only one who screams at the phone/tablet when so angry at the treatment of some of the OPs?! 😾😾😾 Edit: 57:30 DO NOT take up an offer of the Not-so-Grand sorry-excuse-for-a-mother to babysit, you know damn well she'll be swabbing the heck out of those precious babies!!

[@Iflie]

I think there is probably more to that no birthdays story, is she an affair baby? Unwanted? It takes a lot of effort to completely ignore a birthday, especially if you are celebrating someone else and it's a little kid. A birth was a big event, many people remember but then nothing? On purpose for sure.

[@lianabaddley8217]

My Dad was gone for two weeks around my Birthday almost every year. I had four sisters and two brothers. My birthday was always forgotten. I started to count down. Now I just remind everyone of the 20th of every month. Luckily hubby and 3 kids know that My Birthday is the most important day of the year. Lol but I do get my Happy Birthday Mom and big Hug from them every year.

[@Iflie]

@@lianabaddley8217 So you had no mother just the dad who went away. I'm dutch and we have this almost tradition where there is a birthday calendar that hangs in the toilet and all that has in it are the names of who is having a birthday each month in the family. Plus kids are celebrated at school and you have to bring treats for the whole class. It's fairly impossible to forget your child or siblings birthday.

[@lianabaddley8217]

@@Iflie ahhh sorry no. My mom was just busy taking care of all seven kids. My Birthday is June 20th. School had been out for the summer for a couple of weeks. Just enough time for us kids to have gone summer crazy. Plus every time he left it didn't matter that he would go around and check everything out. Car, air conditioning, washer, dryer. Something would break and she'd be dealing with that too.

[@Iflie]

@@lianabaddley8217 Still really weird like he left on his own? And grandma, aunts uncles, siblings , no one remembered. Kids usually count down to their birthday. And moms stres about it because they have to get a cake and prepare parties and would feel like a terrible person for not remembering. Unless you are from a religion that doesn't celebrate, there are a few of those I think. But even those kids will see the celebrations on tv and know about it.

[@lianabaddley8217]

@@Iflie kinda. He was in a Choir that still goes around the world giving concerts. He didn't really have any other family. My Mom has a huge family but only sees each other in August for the family reunion. So she was kinda just on her own. When he would get back we would have a party at my aunt's house. For the 4th of July, my cousin's(who is a couple years older than my Dad) birthday and mine. It was always oops sorry we'll just celebrate then. But no Happy Birthday from anyone on my birthday.

[@santiagolerin]

It IS fair that how much you earn isn't related to how hard you work, and the reason is simple, you are paid based on how much your work is valued.

[@DarkDreamsAndMoonlitNights]

I don't get much for my birthday. I treat myself. I'm building a Pandora charm bracelet. I am going to get myself some charms for my birthday.

[@KazumiKiguma]

lol im sorry but the commenter saying NAH for the fiance wanting op's savings to pay off his debt is yikes. Anyone, and I mean anyone who gets upset someone else isnt paying off your debt no questions asked is so big a red flag it might be visible from space. Ask, sure, but don't get all entitled over someone else's savings, fiance or not, MARRIED or not, it's theirs to decide what to do with.