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3 Reasons Not To Divorce A Spouse Who Cheated

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Marriage Helper

Marriage Helper

Күн бұрын

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@patrickmcelrath4962
@patrickmcelrath4962 2 жыл бұрын
Why can’t people just have an adult conversation, “I don’t love you any more, I’m leaving” without all the social stigma? If you realize you don’t want to be with your spouse anymore, why cheat? Just end things honestly and go live your best life
@debelix
@debelix 2 жыл бұрын
Because cheaters have no honesty, if they were they wouldn't cheat in the first place.
@luvmyscotties
@luvmyscotties Жыл бұрын
If it were so simple to destroy 27 years,where there is no shock, no casualties, and no taxes/ finances...ect
@ningjing1113
@ningjing1113 Жыл бұрын
most people don't know what to live for, so they hold onto something like marriage, or they simply don't have the ability to live by themselves. they rather stay in a bad marriage than stay single.
@Adiscretefirm
@Adiscretefirm Жыл бұрын
They want it all, and believe they deserve it. Didn't you watch the video? Divorce is expensive, keep the safe harbor and have your adventures on the side.
@nhyriabaaakosua2576
@nhyriabaaakosua2576 Жыл бұрын
Exactly my point, I sample don’t get it why you have betrays someone you claim you loved before you can let them go,
@janofokc
@janofokc 2 жыл бұрын
I chose to repair my marriage after my husband had an affair in 1983 as newly weds, then in 1993 he had another affair and moved in with her. It was a hard 10 years in between. He cried and asked for another chance after both of them. Now married for 42 years to him, I see the only emotionally distraught, depressed, not trusting anyone pathetic one, is me. He has remained happy and carefree, taking trips without me having a fulfilling life and thinking of no one but himself. I gave him my youth and my heart. Think long and hard about that 10 -10-10 I pray all of you have a better life than me.
@josephkinyoli5201
@josephkinyoli5201 5 ай бұрын
You are such a precious woman and God will reward you be strong and may God give you peace
@johnnygood4831
@johnnygood4831 5 ай бұрын
I feel for you. After 15 years, my wife did the same. I eventually took her back as I loved her more than life, but life has been miserable ever since. But since I am true to my vows and God does not like a divorcing, I stayed.
@GilliamzGurl
@GilliamzGurl 2 ай бұрын
Sorry that you had to live that way
@janofokc
@janofokc 2 ай бұрын
@@GilliamzGurl Thank you for your your sweet comment. It came at a time I was having a pity party for myself. Your comment brightened my day. Now he is 74 years old, claiming he wants to make each and every day better for us. It is comforting he says this. I am 69 and looking forward to a peaceful, loving husband once and for all. I hope you have a good, happy, wonderful life. regards, J
@saranyaravi2260
@saranyaravi2260 2 ай бұрын
@@janofokc hey there! u got this.. i dont know if he will be there for you or not.. but i pray sincerely, that you find peace.. With or without him.. i hope u find ur inner happiness for ur days ahead.. god bless..
@mariceldb2990
@mariceldb2990 4 жыл бұрын
When a glass is broken, however you patch it, would never be the same again. Just like a marriage. When one betrays, the agony and pain stay forever even when forgiveness is handed.
@dessirejenkins721
@dessirejenkins721 3 жыл бұрын
It can also be blown into more beautiful glass all about perspective maybe it’s not the person that got cheated on fault but the person that cheated and their insecurities
@thomasjust2663
@thomasjust2663 3 жыл бұрын
True, but people don't stay the same anyways, otherwise the cheating would not have taken place in the first place
@asimpleman6464
@asimpleman6464 3 жыл бұрын
@@dessirejenkins721 Humans don't usually appreciate forgiveness they take it as you are naive and easy to fool. They think that thay will get away fooling you everytime. So don't trust people like those.
@deannataylor6638
@deannataylor6638 3 жыл бұрын
When a glass breaks...TRASH IT....just sayin
@McCarlynSLucio
@McCarlynSLucio 3 жыл бұрын
I don’t use glass because is a non living things and I use wound as an example because it’s our own flesh that got the feeling so once I got heart broken by my spouse I reminded myself that it heard but it will held again even though my spouse apologize im still heard but not right away little by little to forget and to be happy again.
@madisonandthefarm
@madisonandthefarm 3 жыл бұрын
I like this speaker, he feels like he gives good “dad advice”, really tells it like it is. It is important to fight for your family, but at the same time if it makes you sick...it is important to fight for yourself first.
@armanijohn932
@armanijohn932 3 жыл бұрын
instaBlaster.
@harrymcnicholas844
@harrymcnicholas844 2 жыл бұрын
Someone who cheats on their spouse has no respect or love for the spouse. They just worry they will not have someone around to clean the gutters on the house.
@francinelieto8899
@francinelieto8899 Жыл бұрын
@@harrymcnicholas844 This
@mavericksuniverse6470
@mavericksuniverse6470 9 ай бұрын
Don’t forget, change the brakes on the van
@estuardomoran3241
@estuardomoran3241 9 ай бұрын
I was cheated on by my ex wife it was financial infidelity, i let my emotions get the best of me and so I filed for divorce, I now wish I never divorced her, she was and still is a good woman who made a big mistake but also who deserved a second chance, my children are now adults but they had it extremely hard even though I was always there for them financially, physically and emotionally it was never the same... may God forgive me for not forgiving my wife as the Lord requested 70X7.
@melvadupree8581
@melvadupree8581 2 жыл бұрын
It takes two to fight for the marriage. People who cheat really don’t care about their partner. If they did…they would care about hurting their other partner.
@melvadupree8581
@melvadupree8581 2 жыл бұрын
@Bayan Santiago The same but I’m trusting God that one day he’s going to change!!
@jessicaryan4405
@jessicaryan4405 2 жыл бұрын
Its not that cut in dry, my husband had an affair, he is also an addict, he also has childhood trauma and no self worth, drugs make people do things they would normally not do, I know my husband loves me and he knows I love him, the affair was about sex, it hurt me and he seen how it hurt me, now he is in jail and off drugs and reality of everything is hitting him.
@BuserODL
@BuserODL 3 ай бұрын
Not true or accurate. People are fallible and make errors
@fredhooshi4294
@fredhooshi4294 4 жыл бұрын
Once the dignity and trust of either partner is damaged ,it shall stay with you and back of your mind rest of your life
@marygracemanatad3381
@marygracemanatad3381 3 жыл бұрын
Totally agrees
@aanchalranjan1852
@aanchalranjan1852 3 жыл бұрын
true
@halfnorfolk5310
@halfnorfolk5310 3 жыл бұрын
This is very true, as I live this reality each day. I'm still with my wife and I have forgiven but things will always be different going forward. I trust and verify. The cheating also made me change my habits. I now work out and I take better care of myself. I believe my wife is worried I may do the same as what she did to me...cheat. Although I would not do this, I think she needs to feel a sense of urgency to "hold on" since I was faithful and I made a choice to "keep".
@thomasjust2663
@thomasjust2663 3 жыл бұрын
close to 80% of partners cheat, yet you do not see 80% divorce, why because the dating world is even worse
@johndoe-xy2cr
@johndoe-xy2cr 6 ай бұрын
This is not true and really depends on each relationship and person and weither you do the right work to repair and build a new and better relationship. I think the reason most people feel this way is they don't do the right work together and apart to heal and grow together.
@bboo8436
@bboo8436 3 жыл бұрын
I would rather be alone than be with a cheater. I don't care if I never find someone ever again, if you cheat, we are done.
@Nhamo3
@Nhamo3 2 жыл бұрын
@Rose smith No one is perfect and we should learn to forgive each other.
@cherylblackman6738
@cherylblackman6738 2 жыл бұрын
You are wise. It is an unforgivable offense. Or maybe I can forgive him, but I would still leave him. Just because you forgive doesn't mean you have to continue to be married
@sudeshgaur6059
@sudeshgaur6059 2 жыл бұрын
@@Nhamo3 yes, forgive other only to be deceived again. 'Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me', ever heard this wise piece of advice ?
@dan-lansingmi9169
@dan-lansingmi9169 2 жыл бұрын
@@cherylblackman6738 particularly for adultery.
@dan-lansingmi9169
@dan-lansingmi9169 2 жыл бұрын
The only reason I believe you should stay in the marriage is if you have children. Of course if the spouse is a narcissist or abuser, get out regardless if you have children. You can not change a narcissist.
@robertoliver7903
@robertoliver7903 2 жыл бұрын
This is a wonderful advice. Pity he didn't give advice about how to deal with the emotional pain that seems to grow everyday, making me confused, sick, and depressed. Betrayal makes you question the integrity of everything and everyone. For the sake of my child I am doing which I consider the impossible: which is business as usual, and I guess for my sake too, because I can not endure the emotional pain. It has projected to a physical pain and I am suffering big time with aches and pain and poor health. God I am doing your will as to not breaking this marriage. Please help me and envelope me with your grace and love. Please show me the path to heal emotionally and physically.
@ThisismeChevonne
@ThisismeChevonne Жыл бұрын
I am right here, right now. I’ve been physically sick ever since i found out last week.
@marthamasden7573
@marthamasden7573 Жыл бұрын
Amen
@dominiquegordon8813
@dominiquegordon8813 Жыл бұрын
In Jesus name amen
@danmcclung861
@danmcclung861 Жыл бұрын
I find myself in the same lifeboat. I fell back on Jesus and stayed. 20 years later, not a day goes by without thinking on it. Found out on our 24th anniversary. Married 46 yrs. now. Prayer helps. But to forgive is a tough one.
@michellefajardo7571
@michellefajardo7571 Жыл бұрын
Praying for you
@waldoadams1611
@waldoadams1611 4 жыл бұрын
How do you get over the fact that your spouse was intimate with someone else? That someone else touched your spouse in places and ways only you are supposed to?
@HandsomePrince321
@HandsomePrince321 4 жыл бұрын
You don't you accept it for what it was. An affair. It already happened. If you live in the past it will haunt your future. Make the decision to consciously become your own alpha in mind. Don't fight yourself over decisions you don't know the outcome of. You do not know the outcome of any decisions good or bad so you have to accept that with every decision there is risk. If you truly love someone or something you make very risky decisions and stick your neck out to get what you want. If you love your wife and you remember how you did all these things and how you made her feel intimately the first time around then make the best decision of all. Forgive yourself. When you do that you stop letting the infidelity affect you and you have a clear mind. Then you can loon at all the facts. Yeah she may have enjoyed herself but the main thing behind it is it was a distraction from what she really wanted. It was you. She wanted you to touch her the way you used to, she wanted you to kiss her the way you uses to etc. Don't take the blame for her actions but take responsibility for what you stopped doing. The same things you did to get her are the same things you do to keep her and i am speaking from personal experience.
@letchumytheresa8970
@letchumytheresa8970 4 жыл бұрын
You have to ask yourself to get the answer.....
@Tonychavez8226
@Tonychavez8226 3 жыл бұрын
How do you repair your marriage if my wife cheated on me and gods Only knows how far she got she said it was nothing more like a friendship but I think she’s holding back from telling me what really happened i’ve got the text and photos .don’t know what to do.
@frenchkiss8789
@frenchkiss8789 3 жыл бұрын
@@HandsomePrince321 great reply. ❤️
@Seven.And.The.RaggedTiger
@Seven.And.The.RaggedTiger 3 жыл бұрын
God.. that is a great question.. im asking myself this right now while being separated and watching this video.. i can't get the image of what "I think" this situation looks like,i know how she is in bed with me and to think she's doing that with someone else is traumatic to me
@6shades
@6shades 4 жыл бұрын
This isn't 3 reasons not to devorce. This is 3 questions to ask yourself to find your own 3 reasons!
@mikecharry9469
@mikecharry9469 5 жыл бұрын
She cheated and doesn’t feel bad about it so she’s not worth it!
@mikecharry9469
@mikecharry9469 5 жыл бұрын
Brianna La Reyna how can you help? We’ve been separated for almost a year?
@apmoe5929
@apmoe5929 4 жыл бұрын
Lmbo
@ProyectoInnovador-hy6dw
@ProyectoInnovador-hy6dw 3 жыл бұрын
Cheers for the Video clip! Excuse me for the intrusion, I would love your opinion. Have you ever tried - Taparton Returning Love Takeover (erm, check it on google should be there)? It is a good exclusive guide for learning how to stop divorce minus the headache. Ive heard some incredible things about it and my mate after many years got cool results with it.
@donh1572
@donh1572 3 жыл бұрын
There is someone who wants you when others don’t
@rebeccaandrew333
@rebeccaandrew333 4 жыл бұрын
A cheater will cheat again and again and again....marriage of 30 years praying didn’t stop him from serial cheating counseling didn’t stop him...I believe in trying to save a marriage however I went through a lot of pain and abuse for decades!!!!! Leave and let God heal you....and if healing occurs on both sides then maybe reconciliation.
@taminamurch341
@taminamurch341 4 жыл бұрын
Trying to save my marriage.. But it's so difficult to save when you have other partner in chati spree...
@Grownwisdom717
@Grownwisdom717 4 жыл бұрын
Is that the cheating bastard in your picture 😮?
@elizabethsharpe6042
@elizabethsharpe6042 4 жыл бұрын
nope. we succeeded.
@monique3528
@monique3528 4 жыл бұрын
They make you feel like it's your fault that they can't stop cheating
@theythinkidontknow1975
@theythinkidontknow1975 3 жыл бұрын
That’s not true a cheater will not always cheat... I have done things and I have changed PERIODT... I don’t even like to think about the things I’ve thought and done
@vibewithAlyssaMone
@vibewithAlyssaMone Жыл бұрын
Crazy I’m trying to move forward and forgive but it’s so hard when the reality is still replaying in your head 😮
@MarriageHelper
@MarriageHelper Жыл бұрын
Hey VIBE WITH ALYSSA MONE, we are so sorry to hear you are going through this. Unfortunately, what you have described is very common to what we see and deal with on a regular basis with the couples we work with. Because of situations like yours, we actually created a course designed to help you save your marriage! It's the Save My Marriage Course Membership! It's 12 in-depth video lessons designed to teach you exactly what to do to save your marriage. You also get the included workbook, a private online support group, discounts on coaching packages, and even private live support calls and trainings with Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes! If you're about to give up, please consider getting this membership first! Find out more here: bit.ly/3EXzcKn
@nok427
@nok427 2 жыл бұрын
I love how another person can use your spouse as a carnival ride and just walk away with a big smile. Getting caught is the traumatic part for cheaters… not the betrayal. Trying to be intimate with your spouse after she/he cheats and seeing the look of disappointment in her face when your finished is something I have zero interest in. She demonstrated who was important to their heart… just can’t change it because they got caught
@eccomiqua7960
@eccomiqua7960 11 ай бұрын
@nok427 it is only when you get caught or when you confess about the affair that you see the pain you have caused. Whilst the affair was hidden, there was deceit but no pain.
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
According to what I read many spouses never get caught or tell. Is that what you don’t know will not hurt you? There are reasons one cheats….that needs to be unearthed!
@kara7777
@kara7777 4 жыл бұрын
10-10-10.....you forgive your spouse 1× he cheats again, then cheats again....30-30-30???? Seriously. .....why always the one that has been hurt and humiliated has to think about the kids, the cheater and everyone. 😭💔
@rainyday7517
@rainyday7517 3 жыл бұрын
That's a good point. Why is that all on the person who was hurt and not the one who did the hurting?
@Gh0stRider
@Gh0stRider 3 жыл бұрын
My wife cheated then shared she never thought of the consequences while she was cheating. Would have been nice if SHE was the one using 10-10-10 before she started the affair..
@blessed7fold
@blessed7fold 3 жыл бұрын
Because the decision to keep the marriage together rests on you.
@thomasjust2663
@thomasjust2663 3 жыл бұрын
It's not the kids, they will grow up and leave, it's mere survival, you can't make it on a single income without going on government assistance...simple as that, the odds of finding someone better are remote at best
@cherylblackman6738
@cherylblackman6738 2 жыл бұрын
@@thomasjust2663 I'm not broke. I can survive on just my income
@sarahsula9867
@sarahsula9867 2 жыл бұрын
I tried to forgive and understand why it happened rather than focusing on it happening, but what I ended up with was my spouse feeling like I was the one needing to prove I was good enough for him to stay loyal and receiving pictures and being told details about these girls he was cheating with so that he could control me and destroy me completely. It took me a year to realize he wasnt gonna change and 3+ years later Im left battling anxiety, panic attacks, self esteem issues, trust issues and depressive episodes...what for? I forgave him for my own well being, and forgave myself too, but never again will I try and take back someone who cheated on me. Once a cheater always a cheater. Im Sorry.
@dan-lansingmi9169
@dan-lansingmi9169 2 жыл бұрын
I hope you can heal from all the hurt. I will say it will be easier to heal by moving on with your life than staying in a broken marriage waiting for the betrayer to change. I suffered for years and years with depression, trust, anxiety.
@georyin872
@georyin872 Жыл бұрын
Maybe you are right. I decided to stay with my wife, at least for now. I found out she was cheating on 12/29/2022. She admitted that night and she did not deny strongly for more than 26 days. Now she is denying anything. But she is still promising not to do anything like that again. I believe her. I decided to stay. But I must be ready to go if I feel something not right
@Howell999D
@Howell999D Жыл бұрын
heal and move on
@mjperfume1523
@mjperfume1523 Жыл бұрын
He is Not sorry, not one bit
@georyin872
@georyin872 Жыл бұрын
My wife blaming me lot of things. It was all my fault that she sleep with somebody else. She even threatened me she would go back to that guy two days ago.
@darrenwade3133
@darrenwade3133 5 жыл бұрын
Most people continue to cheat. After you take them back is it really worth it to be hurt all over again
@kathleenkayejapson4206
@kathleenkayejapson4206 4 жыл бұрын
😭😭😭
@sinfulyetsaved
@sinfulyetsaved 4 жыл бұрын
Facts please.. Not opinions
@erianalee
@erianalee 4 жыл бұрын
Yes, I know someone that had an affair over 20 years ago in the first five years of their marriage. She made the necessary changes by changing her life And is free from committing the act again.
@WillBlindYouWithLight
@WillBlindYouWithLight 4 жыл бұрын
@@erianalee but let me guess, the man likes 'revenge' for 20 more years?
@monique3528
@monique3528 4 жыл бұрын
So true, they don't stop.
@lovelystacy777
@lovelystacy777 4 жыл бұрын
I've been with my husband 10.5yrs & married almost 7 of those years. There was a lot of infidelity throughout my marriage. I stayed & tried even after the 1st time. I fought as hard & as long as I could for my marriage. But I can't keep fighting alone. My husband now lives with another woman. Divorce court is December 4th. 😞
@jessikasolano5310
@jessikasolano5310 4 жыл бұрын
Lovely Stacy good luck stacy .. wishing you all the best in this journey .. hold your head up high ..
@jimcole6423
@jimcole6423 4 жыл бұрын
Sounds like you gave it your best. Having a clear conscience in this matter will hold much value for you down the road. Never look back, look ahead, for yourself. Thoughts are with you.
@demetriuswhitmore65
@demetriuswhitmore65 4 жыл бұрын
Soo Sorry
@martinbamigwojobiachi9110
@martinbamigwojobiachi9110 4 жыл бұрын
Not mentioning. you a lot of women are influenced by outsiders and treat their husbands badly even denying them sex in the marriage although it should not make make the man look elsewhere nit see ex is good for a proper health condition a d ones heart performance.
@kathleenkayejapson4206
@kathleenkayejapson4206 4 жыл бұрын
😭😭😭😭😭
@josephrussell4625
@josephrussell4625 3 жыл бұрын
This will certainly favor those with damage self-esteem. Not me. Haven't had my ex wife sleep out out of the marrital home for over one month and finding out she was sleeping at another man's house was enough for me to divorce her, you can forgive a cheater as much as you like, when the time comes around, most will surely cheat as many times as you can forgive them. So get rid of those cheater immediately Trust is as Fragile as a glass, once it's broken it's broken
@kivakay8124
@kivakay8124 3 жыл бұрын
But everyone breaks trust. Everyone betrays us at some point in life whether it's your spouse, parent, friend or child
@josephrussell4625
@josephrussell4625 3 жыл бұрын
It's not the same. I'm speaking about putting your heart and soul into someone and they trampled it . Let them stay with the people that they cheated with.
@luciavictoria1894
@luciavictoria1894 3 жыл бұрын
@@josephrussell4625 I can introduce you to a man who can bring your ex back permanently without delay..he can also help you with divorce
@luciavictoria1894
@luciavictoria1894 3 жыл бұрын
@@josephrussell4625 Text him on whaxappi
@josephrussell4625
@josephrussell4625 3 жыл бұрын
Not interested!
@roberteugene7295
@roberteugene7295 2 жыл бұрын
Actions need to have consequences, good Dr. Let that sink in for a minute. It's not "punish the person who hurt you," it's establish that actions have consequences. Without those consequences, the odds are that the unfaithful spouse will repeat the infidelity.
@terintiaflavius3349
@terintiaflavius3349 Жыл бұрын
This Dr is a self admitted cheater so take everything on this channel in through that lense
@Sarah-hw7ok
@Sarah-hw7ok Жыл бұрын
@@terintiaflavius3349 does he indicate how many times that happened or if it continued after it was uncovered?
@Hamann9631
@Hamann9631 Жыл бұрын
Roberteugene7295. This doctor isn't an anti-divorce extremist.
@roberteugene7295
@roberteugene7295 Жыл бұрын
@Hamann9631 My apologies, but that's not the point. In the video, he's saying that the underlying reason most people divorce a cheating spouse is to "punish the person who hurt you." It's not. It's because it is the direct consequence of the *actions and choices* of the cheating spouse. The fact is, the betrayed spouse will never be able to trust the cheating spouse again. Such a situation is going to be awkward, at best. Many of my former students have gone through this, and those that tried to reconcile later regretted it.
@nancyoshea8787
@nancyoshea8787 Жыл бұрын
@@roberteugene7295 ​​⁠​⁠​⁠ I stayed with my husband after there was unfaithfulness- it was not easy, but the hurt leveled out after about 18 months. He was more kind and considerate to me than ever. I would not have been able to handle any infidelity a second time, and told him so - that was made clear. He died several years later, and was faithful the whole time. Every situation is different - things should be dealt with according to the situation
@stevemarx6204
@stevemarx6204 5 жыл бұрын
My wife of 20 years cheated on me because I treat her like shit and didn’t respect her and I was broken hearted but I forgive her and she regretted also so bad for what she did and we are better now then before .I change alot of course and I feel bad for pushing her into somebody else’s arms by the way I treated her !Lesson learn
@kennzahkennzah5482
@kennzahkennzah5482 4 жыл бұрын
Lol
@sharathnb
@sharathnb 4 жыл бұрын
It takes a brave man to admit mistake, forgive wife and wanting to live together. Good job, hope u both love each other.
@genasoriano559
@genasoriano559 2 жыл бұрын
I admire you for your strength it takes so much courage and patience to forgive and to changed. We all make mistakes. Nobody in this world is perfect but yes indeed lessons learned and by forgiving and acknowledging your mistakes gives you peace of mind and happiness. We always have to remember that God always forgive us in all mistakes we do.
@harrymcnicholas844
@harrymcnicholas844 2 жыл бұрын
Before she cheated she should have divorced you.
@pressurewashingbrother6061
@pressurewashingbrother6061 2 жыл бұрын
@@harrymcnicholas844 maybe she was scared of losing him! Sometimes life is not black and white
@johnnymorrison9808
@johnnymorrison9808 3 жыл бұрын
I respectfully disagree you should NEVER stay with someone who doesnt respect you.
@danmcclung861
@danmcclung861 Жыл бұрын
I am so sitting on the fence.
@Jon-kw8id
@Jon-kw8id Жыл бұрын
I agree completely Johnny. Once another dog has been in my bun…it’s over!
@marlanharrow5597
@marlanharrow5597 Жыл бұрын
Exactly
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
It’s got more to do with egos.
@doreenlane2370
@doreenlane2370 3 жыл бұрын
From my life experiences and what I have observed that cheaters don't stop cheating. Some marry the person they cheated on with and they also cheat on that person. If they didn't respect their own marriage they are not going to respect other people's marriages.
@anitaleach2745
@anitaleach2745 2 жыл бұрын
Very true
@anitaleach2745
@anitaleach2745 2 жыл бұрын
TRUE
@cleverpointtutorialltd9932
@cleverpointtutorialltd9932 6 ай бұрын
And eventually leave them.
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
Not true.
@zrunne
@zrunne 3 жыл бұрын
Unfaithfulness, adultery, lies. That’s not love. Leave the cheater in God’s hands, by no means seek revenge, God will take care of that. If you must leave, do so. Pray and fast, so you can make the right decision. Pray for the cheater, for they have cursed their life.
@4Peaches1
@4Peaches1 2 жыл бұрын
Amen! That’s great advice.
@rarebookreviewer
@rarebookreviewer 2 жыл бұрын
This is great advice! A relationship/marriage CAN be restored and even be WAY better than ever! I’ve been through it myself, but I will say that it does depend on if the cheater is truly agonizing and remorseful for what they did…willing to go to counseling and work on making something beautiful out of something so dark and wicked. If the cheater is immature and isn’t accepting the blame, that is a big sign to me that they aren’t wanting to build something better. Of course cheating usually isn’t just a one way street but the horrible decision(s) must be owned by the cheater and they must be willing to do anything to repair the devastation they caused.
@leydisilvana7673
@leydisilvana7673 4 жыл бұрын
about a year ago, i found out that my husband cheated on me with my own maid. a maid who used to live in my house and took care of my kids. i also found out they had a baby. my kids are only 7 and 9 yo. i'm still confused of what i should do. i'm still with him only for the kids. because i think they need a complete and happy family. while in the other side it made me want to vomit every time i see his face. it made me depressed. i constantly had a nightmare and not energized every time i woke up in the morning.
@andreamoscoso4065
@andreamoscoso4065 3 жыл бұрын
I hear this happening so many times and I will never ever have a maid. I'm so sorry.
@butubuta
@butubuta 3 жыл бұрын
How come your kids can have a happy family when you are not happy? You teach them they have to stay in their marriage even if they are not happy. Believe me, sooner or later your emotion will cause you a serious health problem. Mind can't be separated from the body.
@janninekourbage1957
@janninekourbage1957 3 жыл бұрын
Stop using kids to be a door mat. Many people do it.
@lumpyspaceloki5075
@lumpyspaceloki5075 3 жыл бұрын
Staying together for the kids isnt gonna make anything better. The hurt will hurt them in the long end. It's not your fault for what he did. You're worth so much more and deserve someone that values you. Dont settle for less
@shivashankaribeerappa4453
@shivashankaribeerappa4453 2 жыл бұрын
No one will be happy in such toxic family dynamics
@eccomiqua7960
@eccomiqua7960 11 ай бұрын
I can confirm my marriage is much better than it used to be before or during the betrayal. We have both changed so even if we are the same people, but we are completely different. This is my "second marriage" with the same person, a different relationship with the same person.
@lcam9241
@lcam9241 9 ай бұрын
Hmmm.
@kwaghmare1
@kwaghmare1 9 ай бұрын
you cheater or cheated?
@estuardomoran3241
@estuardomoran3241 9 ай бұрын
Congratulations, I don't know who you are but I'm so happy for you.
@sergworldwide3706
@sergworldwide3706 9 ай бұрын
I can confirm that the cheating spouse is still cheating 😂
@vishalthakral1470
@vishalthakral1470 7 ай бұрын
Did you punish the other person who was involved with your partner?
@jewhit4790
@jewhit4790 2 жыл бұрын
Love is as painful as death!!!
@badgebadge8946
@badgebadge8946 4 жыл бұрын
Hope this method works out for everyone. Personally, I know it's a bad idea.
@shaundellalder8452
@shaundellalder8452 3 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣🤣this method IS NOT FOR ME. NO man has the authority or power over my life to make my life miserable. NEVER🤣🤣🤣🤣
@hhf4312
@hhf4312 3 жыл бұрын
Also bad advice!
@rafaelandresdirector2886
@rafaelandresdirector2886 2 жыл бұрын
@shaundell alder truth
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
@@shaundellalder8452really….well that might be the reason for betrayal.
@stephaniegordon834
@stephaniegordon834 Жыл бұрын
My spouse of 25 years cheated on me and unfortunately he didn't want to work it out he wanted to try and make it work with the woman he cheated with, but what shocked me was how easily he not only walked away from me but his son as well
@ChaN-ks3ov
@ChaN-ks3ov Жыл бұрын
Same here.
@wisemanmvula474
@wisemanmvula474 Жыл бұрын
So sad
@ThePossumone
@ThePossumone 2 жыл бұрын
A lot of people end up staying single - I see it all the time - decades go past and although they are lonely at times - they are not traumatised
@dan-lansingmi9169
@dan-lansingmi9169 2 жыл бұрын
You are so correct. You just can not trust again and for no amount of financial security or companionship or whatever do you want to take a chance to get hurt again. With what I went through I would never remarry if my wife divorced me or passed away.
@jimanders8812
@jimanders8812 3 жыл бұрын
I wouldn’t recommend staying with a unfaithful spouse I stayed because of kids being small and financially it would have been a disaster we stayed together and I wouldn’t recommend it
@sudeshgaur6059
@sudeshgaur6059 2 жыл бұрын
How about staying married, forgiving your cheating partner for your own peace of mind but live your life as a single ? That way you dont get betrayed again and hurt again.
@anaglez5383
@anaglez5383 2 жыл бұрын
I thought about that
@t4t806
@t4t806 2 жыл бұрын
Sin, don't recommend it.
@arisefunkygrooves4269
@arisefunkygrooves4269 Жыл бұрын
I simply dont understand what marriage exists when you stay married and live single. For what and why?? It means you are pretty= much bound to that cheater.
@iznimustafar3951
@iznimustafar3951 Жыл бұрын
@@arisefunkygrooves4269 simply because we have kids. I thought about this too.
@selloaneramateletse7985
@selloaneramateletse7985 Жыл бұрын
My life now... Single but with him.
@Getfitwithryham
@Getfitwithryham 4 жыл бұрын
After Cheating there is no trust!. And when there is not trust it's like making house on the air, when there are kids it will be hard to move on but when there no kid forgive and move on
@joyceberry2324
@joyceberry2324 4 жыл бұрын
I had a husband who cheated on me for years so he and I parted now he is on his own with no one with no were to live he deserve everything that he gets he left me homeless with nothing and 3 children to look after I will never forget or forgive and it made me stronger I have no respect for him and no regrets
@evelynjoseph78
@evelynjoseph78 4 жыл бұрын
I do understand sounds like he might be related to my now SEPARATED husband....
@brittanybaldwinvlogs9663
@brittanybaldwinvlogs9663 Жыл бұрын
I love this outcome for you 😊
@knightsalmon42
@knightsalmon42 4 жыл бұрын
The comments are more interesting than the video.
@blessed7fold
@blessed7fold 3 жыл бұрын
This guy and his presentation is just perfect. I don't think I have ever heard someone with better communication skills then this guy.
@JoyJoy-xs1vx
@JoyJoy-xs1vx 4 жыл бұрын
My husband cheated and I chose to forgive him,just because I also sin differently and God forgives me unconditionally,I know it may sound 🤔🙄,but yes I forgave and praying for my marriage
@Love-nr1nx
@Love-nr1nx 4 жыл бұрын
Been there...prayer only works if he wants to change. They usually don't
@ralph1682
@ralph1682 3 жыл бұрын
@@Love-nr1nx that is fallacy unfortunately. Dont generalise. Have you stopped sinning?
@Seven.And.The.RaggedTiger
@Seven.And.The.RaggedTiger 3 жыл бұрын
Me to,I want to fix my marriage.. but I just can't get past the image of what another person touching my wife looks like,No I didn't see pictures or anything,but I know how she is in bed with me and to see that but with someone else is too much for me to be ok with
@shaundellalder8452
@shaundellalder8452 3 жыл бұрын
🤔🤔 you got time to waste. You don't love yourself? Self love first sis.🥰🥰🥰
@monicahocking1507
@monicahocking1507 3 жыл бұрын
@@Love-nr1nx i agree with you!
@philipturner9087
@philipturner9087 2 жыл бұрын
If I divorce I keep myself respect, I don’t have to worry the other half is cheating every time they are out sight. Children are better most of the time as they do not see their parents fighting. By divorcing you show the children right from wrong and that cheaters do not get away with it. Oh 34 years happily divorced.
@dawnrano132
@dawnrano132 3 жыл бұрын
I never thought my husband would do that. Had he been honest I would have told him I wasn’t in love with him anymore and I was just staying because he was always there for me. I felt i owed him. It’s so fresh right now. I’m not hurt. Just pissed. I wasted so much time being married to him when I could have built myself a new life by now.
@j.wile.145
@j.wile.145 2 жыл бұрын
Am I reading this right?? Had he been honest? Shouldn’t you have been honest about your feelings towards him instead of using him for security?
@ladya3038
@ladya3038 2 жыл бұрын
@@j.wile.145 Using him??? It was her husband. Sounds like you are blaming the victim...like so many do. 🤦🏽‍♀️
@j.wile.145
@j.wile.145 Жыл бұрын
@@ladya3038 I think you may need to read the OP’s comment again, after you watch the video. The OP never thought her husband would do that. She never loved him (probably why he cheated) She ADMITTED that she was staying with him for security!!! Is that acceptable to you? 🤦‍♂️
@j.wile.145
@j.wile.145 Жыл бұрын
@@ladya3038 I think there are AT LEAST two victims here……
@ladya3038
@ladya3038 Жыл бұрын
@@j.wile.145 Looks like I did read it wrong. 😬
@martelw1308
@martelw1308 5 жыл бұрын
I always enjoy your videos! I am the betrayed spouse and actually SHE decided to file for divorce without even trying to work on our marriage. She claims the affair has stopped (which is a lie). I've given up on trying to make her do anything for recovery work. It's sad but she thinks the grass is greener on the other side.
@efthimios
@efthimios 5 жыл бұрын
Same here , it’s been a losing battle , thankful for being married still and living under same roof bc I don’t know hownlonger it’s gonna last
@ZooomaCW
@ZooomaCW 5 жыл бұрын
I'm also the betrayed spouse and she also won't work on us, she quit and walked away. After we each knew we were meant to be together, I am crushed and just don't understand how she would want to try to replace me with another. My healing after 4 months is non-existent; pain only gets worse. I hold onto hope but it feels hopeless. I don't know how much longer I can take this pain. It needs to end one way or the other.
@petragodfrey4716
@petragodfrey4716 5 жыл бұрын
She is not worth it, let het go and see what happens,
@petragodfrey4716
@petragodfrey4716 5 жыл бұрын
@@ZooomaCW Chris just relax, and keep busy it will be beter in time.
@ryanhart9510
@ryanhart9510 5 жыл бұрын
My soon to be ex-wife pulled the same maneuver. With regard to the grass is always greener attitude, it definitely is but only because there is more crap on it. The thing is that the giving up on the marriage by the betrayed spouse creates an interesting dynamic. I no longer fight with her, I don't get upset when she is over at his house and because of this she is slowly starting to drop her resentment towards me and we even occasionally have a laugh. I don't want the divorce in the slightest but there is also a point where you have to realise that trying to pull them back towards you is just not going to work. Focus on yourself be the best version of yourself and it will come to a point where they realise what they have lost. I am a non-advocate for divorce as I believe that when you commit to another person through marriage it is for life (Except for abuse). Marriage has become disposable which is sad and I do wish I wasn't in the position I am in (As you do) but you cannot force people to stay. Be true to yourself. The pain will go away and it may open up new avenues, it certainly has for me.
@calebace7971
@calebace7971 5 жыл бұрын
My tears just keep falling watching this video of Dr. Joe. My husband revealed to me last May 18, 2019 that he cheated on me and that he and his lover bore a child. I was so sad..it was so painful i feel really hurt I feel like my breath stops. It was so hard to accept it. I was crying for 3 days and lose my appetite to eat and i can't sleep well. I was thinking, what was lacking in our marriage because I thought we're okay. I have been a good wife and a good mom to our kids. I didn't noticed that he already cheated on me. But my husband was so sorry and he said he wanted to save our marriage and he choose me and our kids. This video ease my pain a little bit and made me realized that I am doing the right thing...to forgive my husband and grovel our marriage. But I have this doubt in my mind that what if he will do it again? My trust was no longer like before. May the Lord help me accept what happened and be happy again with my husband. I love him and our kids..i want to spend my whole life with him i just wish he will not do it again.
@irishannmanansala875
@irishannmanansala875 5 жыл бұрын
@@mikmikulec8772 I agree. That's what I've been watching for a week now. my husband repeatedly cheated on me too. And Injust caught him 2 wks ago. At the beginning he is willing to fix our marriage. He said he is very sorry.. I dont knowing he is sorry that he's caught. I cannot feel the sincerity all the time, not consistent with his actions. He most of the time says he'll do things to save our marriage but doesnt act on what he has promised. I've been very emotional and devastated. I've never experience catching him right on the spot doing his dirty thing but this time its completely different. I never thought it going to hurt this much. Weve been in and out of our relationship for 3 years now coz of his sexual addictions that he doesnt recognized. I kept on trying to forgive my husband but right now, indont even know what to do anymore. He left me 4 days ago. He didnt go to the other girl. He just went back to his old town instead. Somehow part of me think that he will eventually go to her affair partner which will hurt me a lot for sure. I still love my husband. Indont like to do the divorce. I just wish he will stop things that he's been doing and start to seek some help. He admitted he does know knownthat he's got some problems with his anger as well as sexual addiction after her saw how I reacted on this last time he got caught... but once again, how since he is with his words about admitting his fault,,,, that part is very questionable as he doesn follow through. I kept kn praying to God to change my husband. I want our marriage to work but I am also terrified to go through his abusive behavior. I know I deserve a better treatment and to have a loving husband. I just wish he changed is ways and start loving me the way he should and be a man and take accountability for his actions.
@Mr400m
@Mr400m 5 жыл бұрын
God bless you. I hope and pray that your marriage is restored. Put it all in God's hands and seek to hear his voice. If your partner is truly repentant and yearns after God as well, I believe your marriage can be salvaged and restored and renewed.
@calebace7971
@calebace7971 5 жыл бұрын
Irish Hopkins: If there is physical abuse involved then your marriage prblem is in a great dilemma because emotional and psychological are much harder to handle how much more if it is accompanied with physical abuse. Think and choose wisely!
@jpelfrey325
@jpelfrey325 5 жыл бұрын
My wife had an affair too. One thing that helped with thinking "what if" is trusting myself that if she didn't again, sure I'll be hurt but I'll be done with her and I tried my best. My mind still wanders with thoughts and I still get very angry but I'm trying. It's a process, hang in there. It's the hardest thing you'll ever attempt and it's ok to feel what ever you feel. Remember that
@calebace7971
@calebace7971 5 жыл бұрын
John Pilfrey: U r right..i told my husband too that if he will do it again..i'm done with him!
@LYDIAOGLOVER
@LYDIAOGLOVER 3 жыл бұрын
This is great but when there is only one fighting for the marriage and trying, this has no validity. Periodt!!!
@goodstuffohhyeah
@goodstuffohhyeah 2 жыл бұрын
If God says it's ok to divorce a cheater, then divorce that POS.
@estuardomoran3241
@estuardomoran3241 9 ай бұрын
How I wish I had heard this so long ago before I filed for divorce. Everything that's been said in this video is so so true. People, if you feel there is hope (and believe me the great majority of the time there is but we are too blinded by anger and self-pity) seek professional advice before throwing your marriage out the window.
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
Blinded by ego?
@InvsPredator
@InvsPredator 3 ай бұрын
You are a funny person.
@patriciahenderson2948
@patriciahenderson2948 4 жыл бұрын
There are instances where it's okay to give it another try, but if they are serial cheaters it's not one of them. People with addictive natures, dishonesty, self hatred, and the inability to confess that they have a problem will not change. You're fooling yourself and breaking your own heart.
@bestonjoseph2193
@bestonjoseph2193 3 жыл бұрын
That’s when life becomes harder. But truth is that will never leave your heart forever
@annyoliveros3322
@annyoliveros3322 5 жыл бұрын
You guys are the reason i hold on to my marriage, giving some hope that everything will be okay after the storm.
@MarriageHelper
@MarriageHelper 5 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the kind words!! we hope you find all of our videos helpful. Is there any specific video you might like to see us create to help you through your situation? We've love to know. Also, please call our office at 1 (866) 903 - 0990 to talk to one of our client representatives! We would love to help in any way that we can. -Marriage Helper
@petragodfrey4716
@petragodfrey4716 5 жыл бұрын
You can defeat the evil if you make God part of the battle, and God can win that one .
@petragodfrey4716
@petragodfrey4716 5 жыл бұрын
@@MarriageHelper Thank you , but I dont need help , my problem happened a few years ago, and unfortunately my husband passed away suddenly, after many infidelity and him coming to realize his mistakes, it was to late, but we had three days together to be together after 24 years together with alot of problems with wrong desicions and affairs on hos side, but I truely believe he did change toward the end , a.or wanted to but like I said to late, but ill always be grateful that I was there until the end , always loved and always will. But just thought I could give some insight for our youngers generations today, that are so lost and hurt today by all wrong desicions, because time not on there side , even if they young and dont realize it . The devil has many faces , but Only God can help and show you the face of evil, wrong lust , and bad , if you realy are a believer .
@jpelfrey325
@jpelfrey325 5 жыл бұрын
Just don't let yourself get run over any more.. they have to earn you and your trust, you have to focus on you for a while. It's so hard but it gets better I promise, even if the marriage can't be saved, you'll come out the other side so much stronger if you do the work, I promise
@gloriamwila4776cjh
@gloriamwila4776cjh 4 жыл бұрын
First and foremost I put God first
@zaneex4043
@zaneex4043 3 жыл бұрын
Sunk cost fallacy - describes the tendency to follow through on an endeavor because of the time/money/effort you've invested into already. Even when the benefits no longer outweigh the cost and the endeavor seems unlikely to succeed you can find yourself still putting time and effort into trying to make things work. I'm not saying that's how it always is but it is something to look out for
@janicesmith1956
@janicesmith1956 3 жыл бұрын
I stayed 18 years at that point he cheated overseas. His guilt caught up with him. I have a handicapped son. 46 years we lasted. A woman made a bee line for him at his bosses child's baptism,.the bosses wife introduced her friend to him. She even picked him up at his hotel. She went twice in that week. The bosses wife was jealous of us. He never said sorry. Went through tests to make sure I had no vd. He was lucky I stayed. I never respected him after that. Hard to live with too he had narcissistic traits too. But I saved hard for old age. He died riddled with cancer two years ago. I have peace and told the bosses wife what I thought of her too.
@Try-Tec
@Try-Tec 2 жыл бұрын
This panned out for you well in later life. He suffered a horrible death and now you are free to love.
@PatriciaReyes-ui1fw
@PatriciaReyes-ui1fw 2 жыл бұрын
I'm nearly 60 yrs old, I still remember how my cheating father disrespected my mother. It wasn't easy judge ordered him to pay $10 per child in child support. I wouldn't have had it any other way struggling for food was easier than watching him belittle my mother. Keep that in mind.
@AriseBeHealed
@AriseBeHealed Жыл бұрын
So sad. It damages the soul.
@lifengli116
@lifengli116 4 ай бұрын
I did it twice, and was believing it would get better. It happened again and again. Nothing really changed. Nothing got better.
@porscheastansberry7935
@porscheastansberry7935 4 жыл бұрын
So don't divorce because of money..assets.,,and friends 🙄 Gotcha!!😂😂
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
Or ego!
@darrenwade3133
@darrenwade3133 5 жыл бұрын
Most people are Narcissis they don’t apologize and they’re not sorry one bit they blame you meanwhile you did nothing but try to make the marriage work
@efthimios
@efthimios 5 жыл бұрын
Omg that’s my wife !! She had affair and that’s what she does ! Blames our arguing and says she didn’t do anything !!
@HOPROPHETA
@HOPROPHETA 4 жыл бұрын
@@efthimios Deep denial and mentally unstable!!!
@wymankaluba3827
@wymankaluba3827 3 жыл бұрын
I relate so much to this view. Sadly the person who cheated on me what's to blame me for her actions
@grayce6509
@grayce6509 Жыл бұрын
Beautifully put and honest my husband had cheated for 23 of our 26 years (I never suspected anything) and yet somehow it's all my fault. Revenge is however not the answer.
@singerboy1578
@singerboy1578 4 жыл бұрын
In my own understanding,a man with fear of God would never cheats their wife's and i have such married friends and a woman with fear of God would never drink with any male friends if not her husband nomatter how much she trusted them and only fear of God makes people honest,trust and doing good even when people offended them or talk bad about them
@melonezeb
@melonezeb 4 жыл бұрын
Not true.... All have sin....and all try to cover it, but when it is shown is when we see sin.
@quentingroomes9892
@quentingroomes9892 3 жыл бұрын
This is it right here point blank!!!
@quentingroomes9892
@quentingroomes9892 3 жыл бұрын
Singer Boy Amen!!!
@EN-bw4bd
@EN-bw4bd 3 жыл бұрын
YOU HAVE SAID ALL THAT IS TO BE SAID,.. Their is GOD.
@eileenwatt8283
@eileenwatt8283 2 жыл бұрын
Keep fooling your self. Ministers cheat too.
@doreenlane2370
@doreenlane2370 3 жыл бұрын
A person who cheats is not an honest person and can't be trusted. It's a character issue that can't be changed
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
Well gee!
@mikewade524
@mikewade524 3 жыл бұрын
Worst advice ever! Cheating is not a Mistake, it's a choice! Once a cheater, always a cheater!
@Saozinha36
@Saozinha36 2 жыл бұрын
You are so wrong 😢
@jhonrestrepo3987
@jhonrestrepo3987 Жыл бұрын
You are so right.
@williambright8171
@williambright8171 10 ай бұрын
@@Saozinha36he actually says he is still capable of cheating.
@bruceford6264
@bruceford6264 3 жыл бұрын
Worrying about "things" and losing friends are foolish things to consider. Money can be recouped, things can be replaced and friends come and go. You lose people you thought were with you, and find support where you didn't imagine. Kids? absolutely. Thing is, many spouses are unrepentant, don't want to salvage things. Pull the trigger.
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
Easy you say!
@brambletbrats3184
@brambletbrats3184 5 жыл бұрын
yes i am waiting patiently for the opportunity to have a 'new' marriage... so help me God.
@BigTomInTheBasement
@BigTomInTheBasement 4 жыл бұрын
Don't bother, my man. Have fun. Live your life.
@user-wv7hj4pr2u
@user-wv7hj4pr2u 8 ай бұрын
This is for partners that really want to change and make their home work.
@garymoore2188
@garymoore2188 Жыл бұрын
Just listen to what the man says listen to what’s in your heart people make mistakes all the time I went through it I was married for eight years. My wife needed a break we weren’t getting along. I was a horrible husband and she slept with somebody it’s really really hard, I still think about it every day but seven years later we’re more in love and stronger than we’ve ever been
@garymoore2188
@garymoore2188 Жыл бұрын
Thank you sir
@E_flores_72
@E_flores_72 Жыл бұрын
Blessings! You are a strong man
@thealchemist6994
@thealchemist6994 3 жыл бұрын
i forgave and did not regret forgiving my man, after 20 yrs, we are still together, happier & successfuL both financial & emotional. I do admit i also had my down falls so did he. We simply decide to stick together, stay in love, live happily with our daughter, nice home and looking forward for vacations together.
@hushanimation2855
@hushanimation2855 3 жыл бұрын
You're delusional
@bonyadiru7026
@bonyadiru7026 5 жыл бұрын
but what if she gives you conditions to stay and come back to you..without any signs of repentence or deep sorry? what if she is rather taking you for granted than feeling sorry for cheating on you?
@EvilHulk
@EvilHulk 5 жыл бұрын
bonya diru that’s how I exactly feel man
@Lilka20061990
@Lilka20061990 5 жыл бұрын
Run man, you deserve better. Don’t be a freakin doormat
@petragodfrey4716
@petragodfrey4716 5 жыл бұрын
You deserve respect, and if she is carrying on as nathing has happend, you must talk to her and tell her what you see and feel, and if you feel the trust is not been respectlfully returned ,she must go , or sit and talk
@kevintomich6445
@kevintomich6445 5 жыл бұрын
Exactly what is happening to me. My wife believes we are divorced even with no paperwork filed. She has no guilt, shame and remorse towards me.
@petragodfrey4716
@petragodfrey4716 5 жыл бұрын
@@kevintomich6445 You decide if you can and want to continue, according to the bible she cimmited adultry and you can divorce her, depends if your love for her is bigger and you can and want to forgive het and move on, otherwise forgive and let her go.
@ZojjaUniquelyYou
@ZojjaUniquelyYou 3 жыл бұрын
Ha! Better after an affair? Never. The spouse will never forgive even if they said they did. Why would I want to live with someone that betrayed me?
@urbanlegend9233
@urbanlegend9233 3 жыл бұрын
When a person cheats they open another door! A double-minded is unstable in all his/her ways. They do not cherish you ...as long as you can rise above the carnal ways it's cool....just know that this person that's cheating on you doesn't mind breaking your heart weather they know it or not!
@dan-lansingmi9169
@dan-lansingmi9169 2 жыл бұрын
Agree with you. My wife broke me emotionally for years with her open in my face carousing with her “boss” lover. Of course it finally came out she had a 7 year long affair with him. I stayed for the kids. She did not give a F about how much she was hurting me. Years later she starts in my face flirting with a business associate. Of course we fought about that. So why invest more emotions into this person.
@dan-lansingmi9169
@dan-lansingmi9169 2 жыл бұрын
You have some beautiful music on your channel.
@urbanlegend9233
@urbanlegend9233 2 жыл бұрын
@@dan-lansingmi9169 ty
@lotusmccary9365
@lotusmccary9365 2 жыл бұрын
The cheater often lies about their partner to the third party
@gennylee6459
@gennylee6459 Жыл бұрын
It’s usually the person who cheated wants a divorce.
@olgagak3501
@olgagak3501 2 жыл бұрын
Sorry, but it is B.S. it is not only he cheated, he never loved me from the beginning, otherwise he would not cheat. When you really love , there is no space for other person or cheating .
@Bobsutubes
@Bobsutubes 3 жыл бұрын
Follow this guy's advice if you want to give up your pride, dignity, and self worth. How well will you family center work if you possess none of these traits.
@shellymarlenemartin2779
@shellymarlenemartin2779 3 жыл бұрын
I agree with you 100%! His advise is basically setting a person up to be duped again! It is terrible advise! I know a couple right now who started together after an affair, and now he’s cheated on her again and again and again and everyone knows it but she pretends he’s faithful. When me and my friends asked him why he keeps this up he says he’s trying to protect the children.😳 Basically, by lying to them and their mother because he thinks divorce will hurt the kids and also, his wife is crazy co-dependent on him fir everything like a child. Such a totally unhealthy dynamic. I think most people aren’t awake enough to even actually understand what real marriage is! This guy is definitely not helping.
@carljohnson6264
@carljohnson6264 4 жыл бұрын
I disagree with this video completely. It’s like he is saying getting a Divorce is inconvenient. Well yeah that’s why the affair is so horrible. My wife had a 6 year affair. I stayed. Now I look at her with bitterness and resentment. I know every situation is different and you have to make your own decisions. I stay bc it my daughters. But they see me crying and hurting. They’ve seen how it changed me from a playful dad into this totally different being. I lost sleep. I lost my health. Maybe a one night stand and you can work it all out. But not a long term affair. I don’t feel like my wife respects me at all. On top of that she knows I stayed so she has all the power. I am miserable. I think your advice is bad. Is divorce inconvenient? Yes But what about your happiness and joy? What about how your kids see you? This is a poor video and almost makes a person feel bad for wanting to leave a spouse who FORSAKE them.
@mljrotag6343
@mljrotag6343 4 жыл бұрын
Completely correct.
@jeremiahramirez1868
@jeremiahramirez1868 2 жыл бұрын
Leave. The kids seeing you hurt is teaching them to live in misery
@skryvazena6548
@skryvazena6548 2 жыл бұрын
A spouse who cheated leaves the one who's cheated, not the other way around. If the person who cheats wants to leave, nothing the other person does can prevent that. I pray that person who cheats will learn hard from their behaviour.
@parthpatel3713
@parthpatel3713 3 жыл бұрын
Indeed, Children get the effects of separation. so did their lives also get affected when parents keep fighting and staying upset in marriage? Don't you think those parents are setting a bad married couple example for their children???
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
I think children are always affected.
@edelquinn8033
@edelquinn8033 3 жыл бұрын
What if your children are aware that their father cheats, how do you raise and be able to insteal discipline on them? I feel is better you leave b4 the man corrupt your children by himself.
@efthimios
@efthimios 5 жыл бұрын
The ultimate horror pain and terror , never imagined this happening to me. People that say dovorve doesn’t impact kids are retarted I remember my parents arguing a few times and was so scared and depressing as a kid
@hcc7691
@hcc7691 5 жыл бұрын
Herakles I’m so sorry!!
@Lilka20061990
@Lilka20061990 5 жыл бұрын
Divorce impacts them but you know what impacts them more? Living in a toxic home with no trust and arguments everyday. Sometime physical and mental abuse. It damages you for life.
@petragodfrey4716
@petragodfrey4716 4 жыл бұрын
HERAKLES Its the most painful thing any child can go through, there safetynet, there safe place are toxic, and scary, and threatened. I do agree to some extend its beter than to be away from such situations, bit that creates so much more hurt for the child in new situations, confused, feeling its there fault. Its sad very very sad
@shorehgoebel5928
@shorehgoebel5928 4 жыл бұрын
It's heartbreaking how ever you look at it. Simply, sucks
@kathyakamimi4989
@kathyakamimi4989 4 жыл бұрын
Divorce is horrifying for kids!!!! That’s why I stayed - but it wasn’t worth it.
@0820vikas
@0820vikas 3 жыл бұрын
Most of the comments are having frustrations and anger. He is not enforcing his thoughts and process upon anyone. He is just telling something and it's upto us wthr to make it or break it. As he said: Hurt-Anger-Rage This is so true and in the end we are all here to learn the lessons. The ones who are cheating and the ones who are getting cheated. Everyone is on his/her journey. Being married doesn't mean that your journies are same. It's just that you share almost everything including your bodies in some cases your heart and soul but the journies are still different. I wish all the best to everyone. Forgive and forget. MOVE ON with a smile. (Not necessarily with the same person) :)) Good Luck 👍
@katerafrazer1898
@katerafrazer1898 2 жыл бұрын
It’s been 10 years trying to make it work and he still cheats emotionally and physically
@oldfatbastard1470
@oldfatbastard1470 2 жыл бұрын
Why would you want to spend time with someone who chooses to hurt you. Without trust, there is no marriage. Why live the rest of your life always wondering if there going to hurt you again? If they cheat, they have zero respect for you. And you have none for yourself if you stayed.
@glendavis1266
@glendavis1266 5 ай бұрын
Maybe revenge cheating.
@Nitronerd
@Nitronerd 4 жыл бұрын
Wonderful hope. New marriage with same spouse. Amen
@truthteller9000
@truthteller9000 5 ай бұрын
what if they cheated and say they are sorry but wont delete the app they cheated on and tell you its non of your business? red flag? really not sorry? thats how i take it
@GuadalupeDeLaSierra
@GuadalupeDeLaSierra 8 ай бұрын
Ive cheated on my wife 37 times, thank God for this video, it has saved our marriage
@alonewolf550
@alonewolf550 4 жыл бұрын
This old guy is crazy he left his brain in his mother's womb
@knightsalmon42
@knightsalmon42 4 жыл бұрын
😁😁😂
@juliabrown2838
@juliabrown2838 3 жыл бұрын
I think so too
@webuysellhousesaptscashoff9453
@webuysellhousesaptscashoff9453 4 жыл бұрын
Great. I don’t like the 3 reasons. God is my resource and I am self sufficient and interdependent. I will be ok. My spouse is Non- repentant and doesn’t feel he is doing anything wrong.
@dutchezzfoxy2559
@dutchezzfoxy2559 2 жыл бұрын
I been with my husband 10 years and he kissed a woman when we had a rough patch but didn't sleep with her but mental torture and trauma is forever I will forgive him because I have God in my heart but I will never be the same
@evalehde3869
@evalehde3869 4 жыл бұрын
I. Watching out of sheer curiosity. I cannot even imagine the reasons. Just getting started.
@mljrotag6343
@mljrotag6343 4 жыл бұрын
Yep, like a car crash of bad ideas.
@ericagarcia742
@ericagarcia742 4 жыл бұрын
How to give more chances after multiple affairs in the past 7months including the first woman coming back in the picture and all I get is "If you divorce it's ur fault, u should keep trying no matter what" 😔😔
@Grownwisdom717
@Grownwisdom717 4 жыл бұрын
Take care of you, be your best self, pray, eat, enjoy, hobbies. Don't sit around feeling bad there is life to be lived
@rainyday7517
@rainyday7517 3 жыл бұрын
That's bad advice. You may be married but your partner isn't obviously.
@JayBesangreCimafranca
@JayBesangreCimafranca 3 жыл бұрын
Im here hcoz my wife cheated on me. She said shes sorry and wants to save our marriage. I forgave her. But the thoughts of her giving herself to someone still haunts me.
@brandonabila6696
@brandonabila6696 3 жыл бұрын
Are you still together?
@JayBesangreCimafranca
@JayBesangreCimafranca 3 жыл бұрын
@@brandonabila6696 yes. As much as it pains me to remember, I love my kids more.. And that's all that matters.
@brandonabila6696
@brandonabila6696 3 жыл бұрын
@@JayBesangreCimafranca that’s great if you pulled through the situation
@JayBesangreCimafranca
@JayBesangreCimafranca 3 жыл бұрын
@@brandonabila6696 by God's grace. His strength suffice. I can't do it alone.
@jayt.1338
@jayt.1338 Жыл бұрын
@Jay Cimafranca bro, how did you got help? And how did u manage the cheating partner?😢
@therealfronzilla
@therealfronzilla 4 ай бұрын
My mother took my father back after he cheated. She said it was the worst mistake of her life. He never stopped he just learned how to hide it better.
@scottjames1401
@scottjames1401 7 ай бұрын
Nope. I tried getting over it. I did, for the most part- but I never again felt like I knew her. For me, hard pass.
@benfountain7575
@benfountain7575 3 жыл бұрын
What happens if you realize you don't really know your spouse?
@euliebernette4108
@euliebernette4108 3 жыл бұрын
@@Divergent333 hello I can recommend you to someone that helped me get my ex back and he can also help you as he did mine too ✅✅✅✅
@euliebernette4108
@euliebernette4108 3 жыл бұрын
Whtspp him
@euliebernette4108
@euliebernette4108 3 жыл бұрын
+,2,3,4-,8,,1,,5,6,8,9,6,4.3.6
@ssaelee70
@ssaelee70 5 жыл бұрын
My husband of 17yrs cheated on me for over 2 years with his coworker and she happened to be married as well. He told me he doesn’t have passion or love me anymore. I tried to stay for our 15yrs old daughter but it hurts so bad that I don’t know if I can stay. Please help
@HOPROPHETA
@HOPROPHETA 4 жыл бұрын
Sorry 4 ur pain. He broke trust.
@wanderlust9075
@wanderlust9075 2 жыл бұрын
I cheated my husband only for a week then I realised the mistake I made and confessed about it to my husband...he is a good person..he fix our marriage back...but I know things would not be same anymore..crrying every day and seeking forgiveness from god😭 ..I spoiled my life
@MarriageHelper
@MarriageHelper 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much wanderlust. We truly appreciate your comment and are grateful to have you as part of our community here on KZbin. Please, don't hesitate to reach out to us if you need someone to talk to about this. There is ALWAYS hope. We have seen so many marriages turned around and made better than they were before an affair. Please let us help you. marriagehelper.com/marriage-strategy-call/ Blessings,
@ramogallardo5838
@ramogallardo5838 2 жыл бұрын
Run from a cheating wife run run run
@ramogallardo5838
@ramogallardo5838 2 жыл бұрын
And don't look back
@eternallife8001
@eternallife8001 4 жыл бұрын
One word = Life is messed up as a" crack in glass" which cannot be made as it was before but can be managed and lived as it is with self motivation and right decisions .Natural death comes one day and its over.
@EN-bw4bd
@EN-bw4bd 3 жыл бұрын
It is somewhere in your comment. There is GOD,..
@mikewade524
@mikewade524 4 жыл бұрын
Cheating is the ultimate betrayal and a cheater is always a cheater. Terrible advice!
@sigmaboi2946
@sigmaboi2946 4 жыл бұрын
For real. This is an advice for simps. Hahaha
@matsidisomoyo7658
@matsidisomoyo7658 12 күн бұрын
Its really sad,because at times the lover of your life becomes too arrogant and you even get confused about the affair which used to be a loving one.
@Itzayanae
@Itzayanae 3 жыл бұрын
I have no clue why I even clicked on this video...
@celinewilliam8267
@celinewilliam8267 3 жыл бұрын
Hi friend, do you really need help to recover your relationship and make your ex come back to you??????
@celinewilliam8267
@celinewilliam8267 3 жыл бұрын
Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and make my ex come running back to me. He can definitely help you also ❤️❤️❤️❤️
@celinewilliam8267
@celinewilliam8267 3 жыл бұрын
Whatzap him now for help.....
@celinewilliam8267
@celinewilliam8267 3 жыл бұрын
+2348084023955
@celinewilliam8267
@celinewilliam8267 3 жыл бұрын
+2348084023955
@doreenlane2370
@doreenlane2370 3 жыл бұрын
If you don't divorce a person who cheats on you they Will keep cheating and lying to you. Most cheaters never want to learn and grow from their mistakes. They cheat because they can and because they don't care.
@genasoriano559
@genasoriano559 2 жыл бұрын
I really love your encouragement. Thank you for sharing 👍
@Joe-tk8tw
@Joe-tk8tw 8 ай бұрын
It was easy for me to divorce my ex-wife when she cheated. She was not helpful around the house anyways. Plus no children were involved. There was no remorse at all. I hope she is happy but I'm happily divorced.
@angelinagrapa8286
@angelinagrapa8286 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for opening my eyes! I was reluctant to hear what you had to say because I have made up my mind wirhout considering your brilliant perspective. G8d bless you Sir!
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