Star Wars: The Last Jedi: An Unbridled Rage

Literally what the title says, maybe this will become a series, i'm just a bit mad that's all....
Source for the Watermelon: • Rotting Watermelon Dec...
Porgs is so cool.

[@ThatGuyKh1]

Anakin didn’t die for this shit man

[@hellishhybrid1839]

If Obi Wan had forseen this he wouldn't have sacrificed himself on the Death Star. Instead he would have driven the Death Star straight to fucking Yavin and blown up every planet in the goddamn system, then flushed Luke and Leia out the nearest airlock.

[@markpye7682]

Happy Hoplite they would survive the airlock. Apparently

[@hellishhybrid1839]

Mark Pye Not if he shot them out the one leading to the main laser. Then fired it. 😡

[@nickmattio3397]

“AhahahahaHaaaa GUUUUUUDDDD!!! Your Hate Has Made You Powerful! >:•D”

[@SovereignStatesman]

khi coolblast: it would have made SOME sense if Luke left to find the Jedi temple and discover the solution to the never-ending imbalance in the Force-- which would make sense WHY he threw the lightsaber away, since he realized that violence was the problem, not the solution. After all, the Sith returned after like 25,000 years, and Luke defeated them-- only for them to show up again and take over AGAIN after less than THIRTY years. Obviously, the Jedi were doing SOMETHING wrong. But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Luke just turns out to be a coward who GAVE UP and RAN AWAY into hiding and retirement.. with no explanation why he TOLD anyone WHERE he went, if he didn't want to be found. STAR WARS: A NO HOPE.

[@r123554]

The Watermelon had a better arc than the characters in the movie

[@thewrathematician1911]

A tragic tale, both heartbreaking in its conception and captivating in its execution. 10/10

[@isaiahlee2902]

Poor Watermelon. It was just left to die and rot in front of us, and we couldn't do anything about it. The world is so cruel.

[@SirMarshalHaig]

The melon goes bad, so it has been good before...so yes that is more than I can say of that movie.

[@Spideythegreat1]

I actually thoroughly enjoyed watching it rot more than the two times I watched TLJ. And the rant was best too.

[@AClassicBrick]

@@isaiahlee2902 This statement has an interesting connection to the Star Wars Franchise right now :D

[@MichaelCravith]

"This place is not Hoth, people. It is _not_ Hoth. Anyway, on Hoth..." Laughed way harder than I expected.

[@AutomationDnD]

abso-FREAKIN.Lootly

[@Dragonage2ftw]

Why?

[@timothydelacy9571]

Rotten tomatoes Is a bunch of shills, and allegorical narrative doesn’t make a movie good if it doesn’t make sense. You’re just trying to high school English teacher your way into saying the movie doesn’t suck ass. Clearly it does.

[@CJ-kg7yq]

@You tuber Always hilarious seeing someone bring up rotten tomatoes like it means anything at all lol

[@anthonymcrooster3703]

@You tuber Dude, this video is just a raw rant, meant to be taken with humour. Weird of you to come rip MauLer a new one and defend this pos movie here. Watch his 3 part series on the Last Jedi to get the _factual, eloquent and thorough assessment,_ but I'm sure you can't be bothered. I bet you think the Last Jedi is a masterpiece and a _fine addition_ to the saga's collection. But I must be mistaken, you're obviously a troll. Noone can have *that* absent-minded opinions on the matter. I bet you liked that triple TIE kill Rey got with her first ever shot with something larger than a blaster, you like how Rey has such mastery over the Force without any actual training (Anakin was 50% Force and even HE had to train for years to get these types of powers). Did you also like it when Rose came out of nowhere and crashed into Finn, potentially killing them both and dooming her whole faction? Oh, maybe you like the whole "failure theme" this movie has going on? You like to see the old veteran characters fail once more after their battles and victories of their own trilogy? You like seeing them do dumb mistakes that are out of their established characters because it compliments the "failure theme" narrative? Wow your comment is shallow, conceited and basic af. Keep on reading what other people only praise about this movie and don't you ever dare to understand why a lot of people are outraged with the direction Kennedy, Abrams and Johnson took and the inconsistencies they created. Enjoy your new-age Star Wars.

[@tlozfreak888]

At first I asked myself, "why is there a watermelon as a background" Then I asked, "Was that mold there before?" Then I got the joke. Good work.

[@ShukaHusk]

My friend wants to know what the joke is and I'm too busy to explain. Can you do it?

[@tlozfreak888]

@@ShukaHusk a slow, not immediately apparent, but very harmful decline that you only notice and fully grasp after some time has passed.

[@ShukaHusk]

@@tlozfreak888 thank you I get it now Oh wait I mean my friend gets it

[@gyromurphy]

@@tlozfreak888 my friend thanks you too

[@AVerySexuallyDeviantOrange]

@@ShukaHusk Plus, that is what a watermelon would likely look like by the time you finish this long ass movie

[@tomasmorales814]

The irony is that he is just literally explaining the movie scene by scene with sarcasm. That’s how atrocious this movie is.

[@joshuakim5240]

The fact that he doesn't even have to exaggerate anything says quite a lot about how bad this movie is.

[@TheSwampDragon888]

Tomas Morales the irony is how fucking stupid you are saying that. You literally just explained how bad and stupid this review is. He's not even making any good valid points, instead he just says everything that happened in the movie with a sarcastic voice whining about irrelevant menial details.

[@adamzalaquett681]

TheSwampDragon888 Congrats, you proved that the review is bad. Your Point: "I'm mad about it, therefore everything in the video is dumb and irrelevant" gg wp

[@TheSwampDragon888]

yea this shit does kinda trigger me

[@TheSwampDragon888]

It's more like everything in this video is dumb, cheap, and irrelevant, and then I got mad. To be honest there are SOME points in this that are valid, but the vast majority is stupid irrelevant shit and dumb childish unfunny comments like calling the asian chick shrek.

[@Acesahn]

Disney : The rich are getting richer the poor are getting poorer, isnt that horrible? *Continues to buy up every creative thought and property thats still hiding from their tendrils*

[@boomerlizard3184]

I need this in a plaque of sorts

[@Acesahn]

Just an artwork of the Disney logo, sporting dark tentacles ensnaring and engulfing writers and other companies would be nice on a t shirt.

[@grimscraggletag6799]

Uncle Walt is spinning in his grave.

[@nube1oscuras]

That’s literally the message when Finn and rose go to the casino planet. And then they try to say something about weapon dealers supplying both sides of the war. Disney thought it was being clever but the Banking clans have always been a thing since the clone wars

[@thomasroyce6962]

Disney is a company of hypocrites

[@kk8490]

MacGuffin ✖️ McMuffin ✔️

[@jarvis8635]

"Shrek didn't even have the decency to die." I laughed for ages

[@morscoronam3779]

His delivery of that line is just perfect, military grade disdain just oozing from his voice.

[@elephantpowerproductions]

Tell that to Shrek 4

[@crabman2010]

30:41 to always go back to that perfect part

[@santoshsivasankaran1935]

"This place is NOT HOTH... Anyways, on Hoth" Dude you're fucking hilarious

[@CalebHimself]

I love the way he points out the shitty writing. "We have someone personally discover that it's salt. It's not Hoth people. *NOT.* *HOTH.*"

[@Dragonage2ftw]

Caleb There wasn’t anything Hoth like about the planet. This guy is a fucking idiot.

[@CalebHimself]

The design is completely Hoth lol

[@tadejmedved7070]

Man’s not Hoth

[@shenronded]

Butthurt apologist detected.

[@ThatGuyKh1]

Here’s a nice plot hole. Phasmas armor Can deflect bullets yet in tfa she gets held up by a gun

[@nex6058]

OH SHIT YOU'RE RIGHT!!! Great observe!

[@dominicomucci3014]

Oh shit yeah plot hole! She could have killed the wookie and solo and fin and escaped! Can you write the next film please?

[@Volteer]

Why the fuck would distance matter with laser weapons?

[@StarWarsomania]

David Gierman ...either it can deflect lasers or it can't. Make up your mind.

[@ThatGuyKh1]

Ok a quick response to people there Fucking lasers what the hell does distance have to do with it

[@johnnyc.3849]

"Oh let me guess. The opening of episode XI will introduce a fucking cloaking device; an anti-tracker; an anti-fucking mcguffin-mcguffin, I'm suuure." Well, hot damn. Jesus fucking Christ, they did it.

[@JadenMoon1475]

You put the Roman Numeral for 11. *_9 is IX_*

[@ryanr.5158]

yoda in episode 5: "a jedi uses the force for knowledge and defense, never to attack" yoda in episode 8: casually blows up a building with lightning from the sky

[@nont18411]

If he can summon a lightning (which is simply the dark side power) then he is far more powerful and far more into the dark side than Palpatine

[@spicysnowman8886]

@@nont18411 have you seen palpatine zap all the ships that came to help destroying them all except for the ones with main characters on them

[@thiccchungo1041]

Maybe it isn’t force lightning, but something more like Plo Koon’s Force Judgement

[@markopusic8258]

@@thiccchungo1041 and it would still be stupid because even if we find an excuse coming from somewhere deep into the lore, even in the extended universe if we have to... It remains amazingly retarded that force ghosts can only now interact with the living world. Don't get me wrong, considering what we know about the force, if it was established early, I could accept it, but not after we've seen dozens of jedi including absolute elites not do it even once during any of the previous installments of the series. It's the same as the Holdo maneuver, it's not a bad idea on its own, but it's fucking stupid if it retroactively destroys previous work, that's simply piss poor writing.

[@thiccchungo1041]

@Marko Pusic I fully agree, I wasn’t trying to defend it, just trying to make sense of it

[@britbloc123]

I've seen more footage of Daisy Ridley training to be Rey than i've seen of Rey training to be a Jedi. :|

[@TheChadPad]

She's a lot more likeable than Rey too. Feel bad for her

[@wilferrero244]

Now that you point that out, I don't know how I missed it before haha

[@Lathander81]

Bro she learned it from the force lol *drinks blue milk* wtf

[@MastaBlastaS99]

@ZadfrackGlutz Zesozose Who hurt you?

[@rhey81]

There is no footage of her training to be Rey. OIC what you did there.

[@kylehenley3903]

Disney Star Wars, "Let the past die." Let's make a live action Lion King, Cinderella, Peter Pan and Jungle Book.

[@jls_flx_grndlwld3080]

Driver and beauty & the beast

[@britbloc123]

You also forgot Rogue One and Solo which rely purely on nostalgia pandering.

[@diondorsey3376]

Ironic... Can save others from death... But not yourself...🤣🤣🤣

[@eliaspeter7689]

You know what? I agree, just kill Star Wars, finish it off quickly and let it alone! Just stop... ruining it more....

[@sirquaffler542]

And I don't even know why they're bothering with the live-action Peter Pan, we've already got Hook.

[@sumanthganapathibasavapatn141]

"He has been tricked, and Luke has escaped. Luke Skywalker did not die." "In the next scene, Luke Skywalker dies."

[@Omnimetatron]

"Subversion"

[@johnyapple8447]

This entire trilogy needs to be discarded from canon. It’s disgraceful that the writers and both directors of these films did no research prior to creating these films.

[@warren88olen37]

What writing? This trilogy had writers?

[@ethanbailey1956]

In my mind they aren’t canon. Like actually I don’t consider these canon, legends is so much better

[@Anon-qp3kt]

It would have made sense if at the very end of the movie, Luke woke up from a dream/prophecy and apologize to young Ben Solo

[@shannonbutler-williams7261]

Oh I did. I laughed my ass off through someone picking apart the same length analysis finally to watch the Rise of Skywalker crap I've been putting off and we went into God mode, found out my "powerful female representation of a new hero thing" has developed nothing resembling a powerful motivation or strategy, does very little on screen work to achieve this, the men are all useless tools, has no personality and ditches her friends to wander off like a toddler all the time. And all Force laws have changed. And I was like "LOL, no, original trilogy, like the prequels, still stands well alone (Game of Thrones.... you bastards), and I can discard this entire... mess that I got nolstalgic for with the first movie and be like "Didn't happen. Got it."

[@Mephilis78]

@@warren88olen37 an AI could write a better script.

[@gianfri7640]

I have to admit, I hate this movie but I love all the entrainment it brought on KZbin. One year later, I'm still having fun watching it being demolished, as it deserves.

[@thomasbowe9956]

Hell yeah! Me too! Lol. It's like I cant get enough. I watch some of these reviews once every couple months.

[@looinrims]

This movie brought me to this amazing channel so I mean $wag420blazeit

[@AtPrEd]

It also kickstart a lot of KZbin Channels with shitton of views.

[@Sandact6]

The only good things that come out of these new movies are the Plinkett reviews and ones such as these.

[@jessekohler6000]

@Stellvia Heonheim And yet all that accomplished was mockery towards her and builds Lucas up as the beloved creator who is now deeply missed... lol That makes it even better..

[@Darksyne]

I enjoyed this more than the actual movie itself.

[@raidthanfl]

I’ve watched this at least 4 times. By far better than the movie itself. His two newest videos are fantastic.

[@bogomilsgg4848]

That's like saying you enjoyed a theme park more than Auschwitz

[@Hebion95]

He was right. Episode 9 made a anti-mcguffin mcguffin for lightspeed tracking. Maybe MauLer is truly a Jedi

[@shadowstar7388]

The MauLer character would more than likely be a Sith. I mean, look at the guy.

[@Hebion95]

@@shadowstar7388 Yeah fair

[@michaelfjmusic]

I know, right! Also... is your name by chance a Periphery reference?

[@Hebion95]

@@michaelfjmusic I don't know if it is. I'm not sure what that is. It's just my name. But I will definitely look into it. Thank you

[@nitroflux_o1040]

​@@Hebion95 Periphery is a band whose vocalist is named Spencer Sotelo and one of their guitarists is named Mark Holcomb; fun coincidence haha

[@krd24551]

If Finn had died destroying the cannon, it would've been legitimately subversive and an AMAZING moment.

[@jamescarr1265]

and we could’ve actually gotten a character moment for Rey at the reaction of her friend dying

[@Evgen991]

@@jamescarr1265 Her reaction would probably involve wide eyes and open mouth to a certain level.

[@LWolf12]

We can't have that in Disney Star Wars, people might come to expect legitimately amazing moments.

[@LWolf12]

@@Evgen991She almost would have had an emotion.

[@UnknownXV]

The prequels are a fucking masterpiece compared to this new generation of star wars. Holy shit.

[@Tedbear177]

Ehhhh id still take them over episode 2... maybe 1... not sure yet.. but revenge is far better

[@jonasgs7443]

Juanmauel ,Te pillo eh! Agreed.

[@stephenkelly2096]

This review was better than the movie

[@Age_of_Apocalypse]

Way better than the movie! I listen to it a couple of times and had a great time.

[@socar2say]

couldn't agree more...

[@desther7975]

This was my thought when I watched his rant about The Predator. Shit movies like that and this are good for just one thing - inspiring fantastic KZbin reviews and rants.

[@sillygoose9791]

"the ship is smaller and lighter it can outrun us" Did... Did they just forget the opening of A New Hope where the smaller ship is caught by the star destroyer?

[@chrisphipson7090]

Well... they forgot everything else about the original trilogy... why not that as well? My God, if I could go back to the 70s and tell my 4 year old self to not get invested in this... sigh... (yes, I'm old haha). I'll just keep the Timothy Zahn books as Canon in my head and as Galvatron once said... "this is bad comedy." May the (original... and hell, even the prequels version of...) Force be with you.

[@harrambou9468]

Robot Head made a good point as well; “They’re faster and lighter” They’re LIGHTER? Things don’t weigh anything in space 😂

[@filipinowhiteboy]

To be fair it isn’t entirely obvious what killed Jek Porkins. We see laser fire but we don’t know where it’s coming from. We don’t actually confirm that it’s surface fire that shot him down. Unless you’re paying really close attention

[@KeacePeeper]

@@harrambou9468 Well weight isn't a thing in Space but mass is. So acceleration, decelleration and redirection of movement should still be slower for a heavier spacecraft.

[@pancytryna9378]

@@harrambou9468 That's actually an extremally stupid point

[@planetbob6703]

I love the moral of the story with Holdo. Always follow authority no matter what! Even if they won’t even tell you a plan exists, even if everyone else is already dead with your leader just standing there you *must* follow authority. It’s what separates us from such evil organizations like the first orde- ...Oh

[@Ashhley_the_shawty]

Well if you think about how insane are the regressive sjw's (with their rabid political dogma) that wrote this garbage, it makes sense they'd want to indoctrinate the impressionable kids & teens as much as possible so as to not only think the way SJWs want them to think, but also to not question them and always accept what they say as the facts. Disgusting

[@ebrahimmunsif]

Bob you completely missed the point

[@planetbob6703]

@@ebrahimmunsif and you don't understand sarcasm :D

[@30noir]

You must follow WOMEN. Part of the Disney brand now. Sexism sells, if its against men.

[@pascalsimioli6777]

@@ebrahimmunsif conveniently not explaining the point, are you? Granted you'd be demonstrably wrong so I can't really blame you

[@WarrenValion]

17:19-17:28 "Grumpy then explains that he tried to train Ben, but saw that he too had 'The Gay'. Ben noticed this homophobia and so he dropped a house on Grumpy and assumed he was dead." Greatest. Thing. I. Ever. Heard.

[@EmanGameplay]

Luke = Mike Pence now?

[@tobiasbracknagel4998]

Its right on top together with "This just makes Kylo Ren even more angry and embarrassed; first he gets beaten by a girl who's never used a light-sabre before...then he gets beaten by an elderly hologram" (c) by RLM

[@joshuajohnson5337]

He was about to use electro shock therapy on him

[@mobiusone6994]

Best ever

[@amanibob1416]

*It's free real estate* I'm sorry... Kinda.

[@shrizor]

George Lucas: "I made the Star Wars Holiday Special; it's the most hated film of the franchise." Rian Johnson: "Hold my beer."

[@byteresistor]

well... Lucas actually had nothing to do with it.

[@Deranfan]

George Lucas neither was the writer nor the director of the holiday special. The first time Lucas saw the movie he hated it.

[@doyleperkins7663]

S R So hilarious...every time I re read your comment...

[@reepacheirpfirewalker8629]

Actually it wasn't Lucas who made the Holiday Special it was Network television who made that and Lucas was so angry with what they did. This is why he demanded creator control or that would have been the next Star Wars movie.

[@Galvatronover]

Oh just you wait till rise of the skywalker

[@Quick-Silver206]

"Then Rey asks Grumpy to come back and help the other dwarves but he says "nah"." "Soon after we are faced with a scene of Luke wanking off an obese quadriplegic while it stares lovingly at Rey. This adds to the character development and plot of the film" Dude you fucking killed me

[@jackrobertson5801]

I was on a train going to work at like 6am. This line literally almost sent me! And then I realised people looking thought I was cracking up at a decomposing watermelon 😂

[@jarrydlynagh2338]

This movie came out 4 years ago and to this day I think about my deep disappointment with it weekly. When I saw this movie it genuinely felt like Rian Johnson hated me

[@Ashhley_the_shawty]

Rian Johnson more like Ruin Job-Shun

[@BiriBiri925]

*Ruin

[@tangobang2642]

He absolutely hates you. He only makes movies to piss off people he hates.

[@Soyuz2578]

How's Uncle Michael?

[@beetlejuice1209]

I think he hates everyone because he's just pissed off his head looks like a fucking care bear.

[@easilydisgruntled]

This video could be the official audio book of The Last Jedi.

[@commiebobo]

This video is better than the movie. I wish I hadn't frozen my balls off riding a motorcycle 1.5 hours to see the opening. This is the last Star Wars I will be paying to see, torrents from here on out.

[@reepacheirpfirewalker8629]

This should be required viewing but also your three part one as well; If your going to make a Star Wars movie watch this and take better care in what you will be making.

[@natedogbfd]

I have officially enjoyed this rant more than the movie,

[@waywardjoker6061]

natedogbfd i could say the same about your arguement.

[@waywardjoker6061]

Matthew Gilbert you do realize that luke changed at the end... right?

[@xFlareLeon]

Remember when it took three movies to overthrow the ruling government in a Star Wars trilogy? Not just a text crawl and a CGI eyesore?

[@SolidKore]

Too bad OG fans hated the whole Using Democracy to destroy Democracy due to the irresponsibility and inaction of those with power to do so. Blinded by their own biases in the fact that their side CANNOT be wrong when several high ranking members of their court (Qui-Gon, Count Dooku, and Obi-wan) explicitly communicates that the Sith have a hold of the senate.

[@Ashley_Jay]

"This place is not Hoth people, it is not Hoth... anyway on Hoth" This is my favourite joke in the whole video

[@ashersmasher2313]

The slowly rotting watermelon was a nice touch. It's symbolic of my love of star wars dying throughout the runtime of the film

[@mattsmechanicalssi5833]

I concur. o7

[@Fridaey13txhOktober]

The Runtime... or the Ruinetime? -)

[@BLCK_MTAL]

Not to sound like those "WeLl AcTuAlLy" type people,but it's mold mdood.

[@diobrando6515]

Dew it

[@noahvadertheberserkerpacki6604]

My love for the OG Star Wars will never die, and will only amplify my rage for this.

[@thetomschaeffer]

I wish this rant weren't true, but it's 100% spot on. Star Wars is dead.

[@titanwarrior63]

Tom Schaeffer How can it be dead if you still have the previous six movies? And that's also considering if you're comparing these movies to the ones George Lucas wrote. In other words, the story of Star Wars was over when Revenge of the Sith came out, and completed the entire saga. Anything else after Return of the Jedi is completely irrelevant.

[@thetomschaeffer]

TitanWarrior 63 just knowing the future of my favorite characters spoiled something for me. It’s canon. I’m over it and not trying to be overly dramatic about it, but I’m disappointed how it’s pivoting. Onwards and upwards. I’m hopeful and looking forward.

[@titanwarrior63]

Tom Schaeffer Canon by who? What I've just told you was what Lucas himself said about his work. He said the story of Star Wars is about Anakin Skywalker aka Darth Vader, when he dies that's the end, there's nothing else to tell. He also says if you want the story of Star Wars, go to the six movies. I've been telling people this all the time. Don't count anything beyond the six movies that George Lucas himself (the guy who created Star Wars) wrote. You'll be less disappointed. That's why I couldn't understand why you said Star Wars is dead. The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi weren't written by him, the guy who created Star Wars and watched it grow from just a fun Sci-Fi movie, to one of the biggest franchises on earth, and not only was he kicked out by Disney (I'm so happy they did this) he even told people anything that happens with the movie (speaking on the The Force Awakens at the time) he has nothing to do with. Makes sense, since he already told the hard-headed people the real story is in the six movies. I always wondered how Lucas was going to write The Force Awakens, I thought Finn would be like Lando Calrissian's son or something. Oh well...but now I'm starting to think the outcome wouldn't have been any different, considering he said "there's nothing left to tell" interesting.

[@justacupomacaroni6387]

Honestly I was more interested in the watermelon than I was The Last Jedi

[@warren88olen37]

There is more action with the watermelon.

[@anthonymcrooster3703]

Watermelon had a more natural development than the Last Jedi.

[@qui-gonrick7002]

Instead of those bombers they should be using Ahsoka's ship because apparently no amount of blaster fire will destroy that thing.

[@archlordv3494]

Roses are red, violets are blue. Never thought I'd want Jar Jar back, but now I do.

[@arami187]

Jar Jar: Wow, the audience really hated me. Rose: Hold my Beer!

[@ardendragoon]

Lucas should have followed through and made jar jar the big bad.

[@sherlockshlome473]

Please help us George Lucas, you are our only hope!

[@Martyna00900]

arami187 I Love you XDDD

[@LDtheBrachio]

Welcome to Messa's side Archlord V! Yousa have reached lighenenmenti!

[@briansinger5258]

This is the best, most complete anti-Last Jedi rant I've seen. I've seen them all.

[@jackharper8370]

Mike C agreed. I'm worried it will be pulled off KZbin though.

[@briansinger5258]

Jack Harper There's multiple back up channels for Murdoch Murdoch so this should be fine.

[@thechapelperilous]

Mike C there are sooooo many.

[@whitehorsedown6499]

Find the gay. I'm not alone. You are not alone. Force goat battles? I am not looking forward to future Star Wars film.

[@DeathBYDesign666]

Oh no you have not! That's fucking impossible, as there has to be hundreds of thousands by now... You could spend all day everyday watching noting but last jedi reviews, and not even get close to seeing even 10% of them. Sorry but i'm gonna have to call BS on that! It's only the most popular topic on one of the largest server networks on the entire internet.

[@factsoveremotions6035]

Watching the Watermelon rot was more enjoyable then Disney Star Wars.

[@InverseFlash]

Sometimes I go back, and I watch this. And it makes me so sad that we live in the timeline where this fucking movie got made.

[@Leuber]

I am happy because due to this film, I know of Mauler, EFAP exists, I have a Rags plushie to… cuddle with, I found out about critical drinker, and learned what makes good movies.

[@InverseFlash]

​@@LeuberYou know what, I think you may be right. And the thumbnail is so god damn funny and accurate

[@jacobw.9437]

One good thing about this movie: I now appreciate the prequels. They had numerous flaws, but at least they didn't spit in my fucking face.

[@shmackatrotsky5394]

Jacob W. thats funny, i distinctly recall the prequels spewing spittle in my face. fucking midichlorians. grumble grumble.

[@user-kq6zw7ic4z]

I loved the midichlorian concept. It gave me hope that that Episodes VII-IX would be based on T. Zahn's Heir to the Empire.

[@shmackatrotsky5394]

Flynn42z i grew up believing that with enough training, discipline, belief, and imagination, *anyone* has the potential to tap into the force and perhaps one day become a jedi knight. midichlorians killed that dream and replaced it with the idea that one has to be of royal descent to have the ability to harness the force. this is a cruel, feudalistic concept. fuck shlucas and fuck kennedy, both.

[@k.-flynn]

shmackatrotsky it's a fictional story dream shattered

[@neosildrake]

They want women to identify with Rey. I am a woman and let me ask you: "What has she to offer other than 'vagina'? Gripping backstory? Nope. Heavy character development? Nope. Intense internal conflict? Nope. ...so what do they want women to identify with? Mary Sue plotarmor? Tearjerking non existent drama? What do they take us for? I love fanfiction, but there is a reason why I abhorr 99% of all SIs (often badly disguised as OCs) and Mary Sues are only good for crack fics and lolz. What about the support cast? Finn? On a PETA mission with that token asian female. Poe? Relegated to the far back. We'll never see him again unless he switches sides or makes some heroic but useless sacrifice that shows off how superior the heroine is. Rose? Rose who? Memorable enemies? Kylo "spoiled crybaby" Ren? General "WTF am I doing here" Hux? Supreme Leader "Sidious 2.0 monday model" Snoke? Commander "publicity stunt" Phasma? Puleze. Give me a break. Killing of the foundations of a fanservice and giving the middle finger to a huge fanbase that has grown naturally over decades only to put out a message about how anything before was racist, sexist and homophobic and full of toxic masculinity and how the force must be democratisized... sorry, but I am out.

[@arnaudbouret5562]

Thankfully, there are no more actual aliens left alive that can use the Force in the movies ;) For that matter, outside of Chewie, how many nonhumans are there left alive on the Falcon at the end of the movie? :p

[@nickkokenspargermusic8666]

Neosildrake thank you !!!! You’ve given me hope !!

[@jeffvella9765]

The funny part is that their stupidity makes woman appear bad. They first put woman in-charge in the worst, most forced way possible, only to have them lose so badly that only a ship is left out of the entire resistance. I don't think woman are that incompetent, but I do believe those man-haters that unjustly call themselves feminists, are definitely on the highest level of incompetence. The horrible movie proves it.

[@definitelyadarkangel9225]

Funny thing about Shrek is she was added to pander to Asian audiences since they're the largest growing movie audience out of the U.S. and they hated her. They hated her so much in fact that the film failed to gross more than 3/4 million dollars in china in the first month of release.

[@gigachud666]

I've taken to calling her Ma-Rey Sue "Godmode Cheatcode" Plotarmour since reading this comment.

[@LordyT34]

Gotta love when the whole movie is based on saying "How many times can we say gotcha?"

[@tigerlancer]

Disney star wars trilogy was the worst execution of passing the torch in the history of franchise money grabs. 😢

[@saltycorpsman5696]

Three of the greatest scenes in star wars. 1. Obi-wan lamenting the fall of Anakin on Mustifar after he beats Anakin. 2. The big reveal. Vader telling luke that Vader is his father. 3. Luke's reaction to hearing that his best friend was killed by his nephew. The very same nephew luke failed to keep from falling to the darkside, allowing the audience experience Luke's pain. Wait... What's that you say? We need to scratch that scene for green sea cow tits? Oh, we were going for a dumpster fire.

[@streetlawyer]

Replace 3 with kylo learning that Luke is meditating on ach to. Don't kid yourself. Tlj is fucking awe inspiring

[@MrJerkelm]

@@streetlawyer Its true. Its stupidity is truly awe-ful

[@streetlawyer]

@@MrJerkelm sorry you didn't get it

[@wd940]

street lawyer this must be a troll, but just in case, why is durr oh he wasn’t even here lol better than what would have been a very emotional part of the story

[@streetlawyer]

It was already an emotional part of the story. Luke talking to Leia, and returning to face down an army is already emotional highlight/climax of the whole flick. The fact that he is not 100% there physically, is a moot point. I heard a marine vet sum it up nicely (comics matter with ya boi zack review of tlj), "he showed up on the battlefield, and had an effect on the outcome of the battle, which was DECISIVE." His act was an illusion of a fight, and what he accomplished was an act of mystification and misdirection. "A Jedi uses the force for knowledge and defence, never attack." Are you going to quarrel with YODA on this point? Luke denied kylo the act of killing him, and denied himself the possibility of killing kylo. The whole thing was a giant Jedi mind trick, like obi wan manipulating the storm troopers. The fact that Luke is doing all this while meditating on a mountaintop, is deeply symbolic of the original influences of the Jedi, namely Buddhist and eastern esoteric philosophies and practices. Rian is taking the original influences and making them more direct. Luke is utterly untouchable in this Kurosawa samurai duel, and the awe inspiring story of Luke cannot be destroyed by the might of the first orders heavy duty weaponry, or kylo ren's rage. How's that for meaningful.

[@PathofCultivation]

Atleast in the prequels you had a glimpse of the wider galaxy, various planets, cultures, governments, ambassadors, councels and unions of people deciding on the fate of the galaxy. Good worldbuilding gone in favour of more red lightsabres, another dark lord in black mask, another army of stormtroopers, another death star, none of which explained btw... a whole universe of lore and history to play with, but we get a boring soulless rehash of the same old shit.

[@windwind3170]

Also the Clone Troopers. Can't forget them boys in the White.

[@randeli7785]

Wind Wind The clones have a real sense of brotherhood. The rebel soldiers seem one-dimensional. I'd pick clones over rebels any day.

[@asuitandty]

The clone troopers are not comparable to this crap, they had their place, they had a reason.

[@DavosWoWd3Tube]

Nice profile pic xd

[@scottm8292]

25:47 "Gorgeous, creative, and dumb as fuck" This film summed up

[@tsitsifrance887]

I was gobsmacked in the theater when I saw this scene. You couldn't hear anyone breath! I was actively trying to not think about the movie critically because I didn't want to open myself up to the possibility that star wars was dead/dying. I then had time to think about other things, get disillusioned by TROS, then come back to criticisms of TLJ and accept the reality of its shitiness. I really appreciate that for all his anger at this movie, and the dumb choices of the writers he can give credit where credit is due....that holdo maneuver was extraordinary...(if you don't think about it)...

[@jamesfoley6939]

Years later and this movie still remains at the top of the list for soul-destroying films.

[@Q69573]

30:41 "Shrek didn't even have the decency to fucking die" I'm dying... laughing.

[@HaganeNoGijutsushi]

The problem is, Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

[@nickmattio3397]

Should of called in Lloyd Christmas with his gun

[@--deusvult--]

Wasn´t "Saving what you love" what turned Anakin to the Dark Side?

[@thefilmwhisperer1105]

Ah! That's a very good point. And correct! Yes, he threw away everything he fought for to save one person. Only to create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

[@charleswaldon8362]

Too true

[@charleswaldon8362]

Another shit poke hole in the established continuity

[@OGStarwars]

Great point- you are correct. Goes to show how the new DLF knows nothing about the lore.

[@BrosephStalin1914]

Oh shit

[@violentmankey4910]

"Do it by saving what you love" that's literally what he was doing 😂

[@cassidymalone]

Your series of Unbridled Rage is the most well thought out, brilliantly comic dissection of filmmaking that I have come across and I truly hope you don’t ever stop. I was in tears when you were breaking down the bombs dropping, how they don’t die from how slow they drop, and the cherry on top was “and where the fuck is GRAVITY coming from ANYWAY?” Please keep these coming. They’re nothing short of amazing.

[@therealdeal4250]

Shrek didn't even have the decency to die This^

[@iunary]

YES! thats what i said ... like WTF? at least fucking DIE! but nope this movie has NO fucking balls whatsoever -.-

[@TheSlammurai]

And they let Leia survive so she could have no impact on TROS and have the dumbest death there instead. Letting her stay dead in TLJ would have been so much better and much more respectful.

[@ericvandiver3739]

Shrek didn't even have the decency to die... bahahahaha

[@shaneweaver2036]

That pretty dark, LMAO!!!!!!

[@SoulSir5vr]

@@shaneweaver2036 Other than that stuff I loved it.....

[@marshmallowvampire8503]

And you know what else, Fin sacrificing himself wouldn't even have been all that cool anyway. B'coz #1) Not much arch, #2) He's a joke machine & not much else, #3) Ever since he ran away, he hasn't been a stormtrooper, he's been... shallow, practically unskilled. If they let him be a little hard core, dignified, & have his natural British accent, he could've been cool. #4) He has been a bit of a coward, but if he had arch, it might be okay. But neeeh-oooooo.

[@shaneyy__]

Briana Mills no, it would have been an arc. Instead of running, he charges on to his destiny, finally making a selfless decision. It’s still an arc, he learned the lesson, but the effect is GREATLY reduced because of the cock-blocking performed by this random Asian chic. It would have saved his character. That’s specifically WHY it wasn’t how his story ended. Because it would have been a semblance of skill and competence on behalf of Kennedy and Johnson. But then they couldn’t sell toys.

[@carlosesteves4007]

I know why couldn't she die nobody likes her

[@johnmchugh8049]

Thank you for your efforts - in literature classes and mass communication I was taught the standards you judge by, and until I found your channel I have felt alone for over two decades, trying to understand why garbage is being fed to me and if I question it... I’m some sort of hateful bigot , only for asking people to use logic - your research and hours spent are much appreciated brother

[@JazzyUnderscoreTrumpeter]

I hear you, brother

[@kossend1]

"...this place is not Hoth, people. It is not. Hoth. Anyway on Hoth..." Gold

[@MauLerYT]

Well, I could never have imagined that my video would get this kind of response; My most viewed work sits at like 3K views so this was a shock, thank you guys so much for checking it out and I can see that a lot of us feel very similarly about the movie itself. I honestly don't care that much about how Star Wars is now dead or how this movie doesn't fit the universe or whatever, my concern is with how poor the writing is. Regardless of the goals of the writer, this was simply an awful attempt at constructing a cohesive plot for a movie, simple as that, no agenda, no controversial fan base splitting, just plain old, bad writing from a standpoint of movie making. How does this happen for what is the biggest movie of our culture for this year? in a time where we have had like, 100 years of movies to learn from, it's bizarre. Anyway, I really appreciate the kind words and I would implore you all to take a chance on my other work if the topic interests you, thanks again and may the forc....... erm...... Merry Christmas! :)

[@catdaddychris666]

Finally some realistic commentary on this piece of crap movie

[@keithbarnett3635]

Yo,you forgot Shrek and Finn heroically rescuing and freeing the giant catdonkeys,and not giving two f#cks about the slave kids

[@jumhed994]

MauLer And Finn isn't a pilot and can't fly.

[@TheJim4060]

I link this vid to people to show them the plot line and plot holes i have issues with. tired of people saying i am upset cause i didnt get what i wanted. Its what i got that makes me upset. I am all for trying something new but holy shit what was this? Only thing i took from the movie was to have rey and kylo in the forefront and opened up the force so they can make sense with whatever they are going to tell us in 9....W.T.F as you say. guess will see what happens in 9. *Grumpy said nah* Epic! .......Happy Holidays

[@omniscientfool2749]

Your video is masterful, great timing, inflection, humor and spot on with your commentary. Thank you and I look forward to your future works!

[@tr1p1ea]

This was Lucas's way of getting back at all those who ripped him about the prequels, sell SW to the worst possible corporation in history and watch them completely fuck it til it's dead.

[@nithinkhydrose4899]

I doubt it. It would be like cutting off the nose to spite the face.

[@daveleicester8292]

Nithin KH he got over 4bill for that nose and only the left nostril was paid for in cash. The other he could keep on his face as 50% (roughly) in Disney shares.

[@lorenzohatchett4823]

Lol true

[@scepticalbeliever]

He actually donated the cash.

[@Liberator130]

Lucas. I'm so sorry. Please come back.

[@samgilley3160]

Watching a watermelon slowly rot is actually a pretty good allegory for this movie tbh

[@Neo-cj1im]

When Luke threw anakins lightsaber over his shoulder and walked away Star Wars died and still haven’t recovered

[@JadenMoon1475]

Really?? Y- You're not even going to *_Capitalize_* Anakin's name, or add the appropriate apostrophe?!?!? I smell a rat who *_"PrAiSeS"_* the sequels, *_NOT EVEN REALIZING THEY'RE RE-GASHING THE ANAKIN VERSUS PALPATINE RIVALRY IN THE FORCE, WHILST BASHING LGBTPQIA÷ PEOPLE, AND PRAISING THE PREQUELS!!!_*

[@Edgar-Friendly]

Rian Johnson wanted this movie to be about failure. Mission Accomplished.

[@UnfaithfulServant97]

Wasn't Empire Strikes Back about failure too? Luke failed to defeat Vader. Vader failed to bring Luke into the Darkside? Leia, Chewie, and Lando failed to rescue Han from Boba Fett? Whatever.

[@DeathBringer769]

Kylo seemed pretty successful this movie though. Boss (Snoke) is dead and can now take his position like always planned, Luke is now dead like he always wanted (even though he didn't get the satisfaction himself, he indirectly caused his death.) The only thing he seemed to fail at was converting Rey fully to the dark side, lol.

[@UnfaithfulServant97]

Deathbrewer - The First Order is in shambles. Star killer base is gone, and they lost a good chunk of their fleet from Admiral Purple Hair's sacrifice, especially Snoke's ship. They took a heavy blow here. And Luke dying isn't really much of a victory since Luke is guaranteed becoming a Space Ghost like Yoda and Kenobi.

[@Edgar-Friendly]

Yet, the First Order controls the galaxy.

[@UnfaithfulServant97]

apostate001 - Yeah, that's so dumb.

[@toatakanuva4846]

Don’t call Rose Shrek: One is a deifnition of not only a well written character whose motivation make sense, but is also extremely popular. The other one is Rose

[@jarlbalgruuf7701]

Calling rose shrek is an insult to shrek

[@yanribeiro7108]

@@jarlbalgruuf7701 It's an insult to the ogre race. In other words, ogreist.

[@troglodyte1378]

Shrek has layers. Rose doesn’t

[@darkbum1510]

Also sexy as fuck. Not Rose.

[@nouche]

…who has the first aspect you mentioned, but not the second.

[@MCJAWWZ]

"Other than that stuff, I loved it." I cried laughing ngl.

[@jarrydlynagh2338]

Who else here in 2020 waiting for The Rise of Skywalker: An Unbridled Rage

[@warren88olen37]

I think he didn't survive watching the movie.

[@Maplelust]

the hype was well deserved.

[@MariOmor1]

He did it.

[@Red88Rex]

Man, the prequels are looking great right now.

[@jalvorson]

Red88Rex even Dexter Jetster and the 50's diner?

[@vanillajack5925]

GridTV Yep, even that is better than this garbage!

[@jalvorson]

Nate Lightning what about jar jar stepping in the bantha pooda?

[@Kikuta1Kotaro]

Even old JarJar can´t hold a candle to the new JarJar: Rose and thats saying something...

[@jalvorson]

Kikuta1Kotaro even the cringy looking outdated CGI plaguing every shot in those movies?

[@internetknownothing]

I knew it was over as soon as Luke tossed the lightsaber.

[@HistoryandReviews]

Andrew Schulte I knew this was over as soon as they rehired the cast from episode 7. Poe is the only good actor

[@scottski02]

I knew it was over when Poe and Hux have the retarded "Can you hear me?" prank call. A prank call....in a fucking Star Wars film. Just why???

[@HistoryandReviews]

Han Solo did a prank call in Episode 4

[@scottski02]

+History and Reviews The difference there was that Han did it pretty much spur of the moment because he had to come up with some excuse immediately, and the movie showed that it was a stupid spur-of-the-moment idea that caused a lot of reinforcements to be sent their way. In TLJ, the dumb prank call was apparently part of Poe's entire strategy and actually succeeds, as if the FO (which Hux explicitly said were there to kill them all and take no prisoners) wouldn't just blast him away the moment he parked in front of their ship.

[@skakirask]

This video saved me from paying for a ticket to this movie back in 2017. Thanks Mauler

[@user-zk5ym9ut1j]

This aged like fine wine

[@sarahbenton7573]

"This place is not Hoth, people. It is not. Hoth. Anyway on Hoth..."

[@noble20xx56]

Along with the 'Not Snow Speeders' and 'Not AT-ATs

[@psychotictactoe]

We bitched at Lucas for the prequels.... i think the joke is on us now he's gone.

[@Gaminglord12]

psychotictactoe It kinda makes you think about all the hate he got for trying new stuff that didn’t always work. Say what you want about Lucas but he loved the universe and at least tried to be creative and consistent. Now we get this shit instead.

[@Z95HeadHunter]

I cannot divorce the many flaws from what I liked about the Prequels, but the fact is, the Prequels despite its issues at least had interesting arcs and parallels.

[@TyrDrum]

@@Z95HeadHunter "Good ideas poorly executed." - The prequels in a nutshell

[@Z95HeadHunter]

@@TyrDrum Some things were really well executed, like Palpatine's rise, and Obi-wan's character. I think his banter with Anakin was pretty good too at times if Anakin's dialogue didn't drag it down (at times) Other things were less well executed, namely the romance between Anakin and Padme or the pacing.

[@thathandsomedevil0828]

The Rageholic called it, he told us we would beg for the sweet release of death and lament the absence of George Lucas from the franchise and holy shit did those predictions come through; fuck us, he was right. XD

[@SilverSpoonRiche]

Took me 15min to realize the watermelon was molding. LOL

[@InitiallyJayKay]

I love that the background image just progressively decays

[@JadenMoon1475]

"Now Po has completed the destroy surface blasters side quest, he has enough XP to unlock the Bombing Ability" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Yusuf1187]

What I find hilarious about people who liked this movie is that they call anyone who disliked it a "fanboy". But the people who like this abysmal mess just because it's "Star Wars" are supposedly *not* fanboys.

[@edward4840]

OHP77 but what the fuck did you expect? A masterpiece? Are you surprised that they're trying to market the Porgs? It's a disney fucking Star Wars film in 2017! It's ridiculous to expect that this would be incredible!

[@pilotamurorei]

Mark ellis and Peri Nimrod on collider in that fans vs critics video made me cringe harder than the LA slut walk. Those two IMMEDIATELY jumped on the fans, blaming THEM, NOT Disney, for the bad ratings. At least you could tell Harloff wanted to bash the movie but he knew he couldn't because of Disney access, but you could see it in his face that the way Doofus and Nimrod kept bashing fans.

[@Kataxu]

You're a fanboy if you don't agree with everything I say. Fact.

[@oyclo]

OHP77 the irony is that they aren't wrong. It's the fans that are pissed at how bad this was on every level except for visual.

[@whos-the-stiff]

OHP77 Exactly, the irony is completely lost on them!

[@JohnCollins]

You missed a plot-hole. Del Toro SELLS information about the rebel transports when there is NO WAY he could have known about it because Shrek and Finn didn't know that either.

[@ReuWil]

Right - he sold them out to let the First Order know about a plan those he was with didn't know about themselves - if they had they wouldn't have gone on that mission to begin with. Makes no sense...at all.

[@rinzler9775]

John Collins - well he got 999 out of a thousand plot holes - not a bad hit rate.

[@Weaseldog2001]

"especially compared to the other stuff." That covers pretty much everything...

[@DeltaSpider_]

Unexplained close-up of a watermelon is TIGHT!

[@Ruvik049]

“Kylo told Rey to embrace the gay-“ “She says nah”

[@Cre80s]

I remember the good ol' days when everyone argued which is better, Star Wars or Star Trek, and my answer was always "there is no winner, both are great". But now, my answer is "there is no winner, both are ruined."

[@As_Expected_of_Pieck]

Both by that fucking hack J.J. Abrams no less. Funny how the universe works.

[@Xemnas4]

As Expected of Pieck You give Abrams far too much credit. These franchises were destroyed by an increasingly casual audience that cares more about instant gratification -- superficial shit like fancy CGI and "pew-pew" lasers -- than they do a well-crafted story and characters. That, and the horror known as "brand name recognition." Modern filmmaking is the true culprit, and men like Abrams are little more than a patsy.

[@jeffarmstrong1699]

Indeed, i cannot stand any of the rebooted Star Trek movies. Completely misses what Star Trek is all about. Now we see the same thing happening to the beloved Star Wars.

[@austinreed7343]

As Expected of Pieck Star Wars was ruined first. By LUCAS HIMSELF.

[@jeremyrainman]

Nah, Star Trek has been turned into an action film franchise, true, but they really cast the characters well. I'm at least not seeing Kirk sobbing on the bridge because social justice demands that he repent for his toxic masculinity. This is the equivalent of what they did to Luke in this last film.

[@Alexis-hx3yd]

This video should be required viewing at Disneys board meeting.

[@eddyspagetti9899]

they've probably spent as much money on social media shills DEFENDING TLJ as they did on promoting it. There's NO WAY they'd tie up their shoes to watch this. let alone, HONOR the absolute truth of it. they could gain so much from just admitting too. accepting how AWFUL VIII was. people are VERY FORGIVING to those that honor their fuckups.. no matter how big. aint gonna happen.

[@gigachud666]

As well as to any TLJ apologists.

[@hectorjonas4970]

Pfft u guys really should drop your big-ass nostalgia fandom and accept that things change, allow yourselves to enjoy the fucking movie man, it really isn't horrible as all you guys are depicting it, i myself enjoy all Star Wars movies, why can't everyone else do it?

[@Biggiiful]

@@hectorjonas4970 why is this the ONLY way you guys defend this film? To just insult and accuse everyone who points out it's flaws as people obsessed with nostalgia? Our problems have fuck all do do with nostalgia. Did you watch the video you commented on? Our problems have to do with consistent narrative and good story telling. TLJ ruins TFA (which has it's own issues). So nostalgia has nothing to do with that issue. As that's only 2 years old. TLJ also contradicts itself multiple times. It fails at telling a story. That's it's biggest issue. An issue that has nothing to do with any other movie in the series whatsoever. So that has nothing to do with nostalgia too. Why can't everyone ignore MAJOR issues with this film and just like it anyways like you? I dunno man. Are you actually asking why that is? I mean I like some movies that have makor issues as well. The difference between me and you is that I don't IGNORE those issues and I understand that other people aren't going to look past them. I don't tell them they are stupid for not blindly liking everything I do. If you like TLJ...power to you. But you can't just ignore the narrative flaws, plotholes, and character inconstancies and tell people they are stupid for pointing those out.

[@JasonHauser125]

That's bullshit Hector Jonas. The originals aren't perfect either but you're wrong about nostalgia. TFW and TLJ are heavily flawed in logic in too many ways to count, but Mauler here does a pretty damn good job of pointing them out. Jesus, we don't even know how the First Order came to be after the utter destruction of not one but two Death Stars and the death of the Emperor and Vader! It is utterly glossed over and waved away because of Plot Reasons. And WHY the fuck isn't the Resistance the same thing as the Republic? Is Coruscant even a thing anymore in Star Wars? Who knows???

[@fanlikeyourself5053]

The Melon is a representation of Star Wars as a franchise.

[@fortnitesexman]

To summarize the whole movie "What the fuck"

[@HedgehogGames001]

Well... at least the watermelon had a complete character arc.

[@WeedShaggy]

That Waternelon had an important role in the movie. My favorite Star Wars character.

[@scottski02]

Star Wars: The Last Watermelon. A tragedy on par with Hamlet

[@SergioPorcu1]

lol

[@rengokuwon1999]

This comment tho 😂😂😂

[@crj1138]

The watermelon had a far more interesting and emotional arc than any of the wankers that pass for characters in this new Star Wars.

[@Koshiro2k3]

"They are put in prison because they parked wrong" is something you'd usually expect to be a snappy metaphor of some kind. But no, it's what actually happens in the movie!

[@StarWarsomania]

Koshiro2k3 I thought he was joking until I went to the theater to see it, and _they were fucking arrested for parking wrong!_ What the fuck?

[@Cipher71]

It's so stupid because even in the EVIL UNITED CAPITALIST PATRIARCHICHAL STATES OF AMERICA you only get a parking ticket for that shit. What was even the point, aside from a flimsy excuse to include yet another needless 'gotcha' moment?

[@muznick]

Mauler should have spliced in that scene from Spaceballs: "You're under arrest for illegal parking!"

[@NEEDbacon]

@@muznick At this point Spaceballs is a better cannon Star Wars film then this trilogy. They even Comb the Desert in the next one.

[@alitabattlebot013]

Still one of my favorite videos to revist. It was my introduction to Mauler as one who was reeling after watching the abomination that was TLJ. For the first time in my life I had watched something star wars and not loved it, not only that, I thought I didn't like it at all, so I took to KZbin to see what others had to say. Thank you TLJ, for providing me with hundreds of hours of entertainment...

[@nihilisticadventure]

Same here, this was the video that started it all for me. Mauler is at the epicenter of the whole network that branched out there- it all started with him, and this video.

[@ordeporama]

Dude , exact same . The confusion and disgust i felt after having watched it compelled to see if any body else saw what i just saw . Additionally, I wasn't as passionate about star wars then as I am now . All the videos I've seen from ppl that can break down what works and doesn't have really deepened my appreciation for star wars

[@gh0stykins]

actually the throne room scene is one of the most horribly choreographed scenes in the history of movies. very fitting indeed.

[@trevorthornley8835]

It is the worst lightsaber battle ever. You can see IN FRAME a guy throwing away his weapon so Kylo can stab him.

[@gh0stykins]

@@trevorthornley8835 yup. lots of absolute fuckery going on. like... just why

[@HerculesBallsInc]

Not to mention all the times they stand around waiting for their attack cue. It's kind of sad.

[@trevorthornley8835]

@@HerculesBallsInc there's even guys in the background attacking nothing

[@iamnotanumber100]

Jar Jar is delighted he’s not in the worst movie now 👍

[@annieandelsieofarendelle3294]

Jar Jar: Yousa made fun ofa meesa, so I usa my dark powers to create the worse movie in theesa saga! HAHA!

[@dangelini1137]

Annie and Elsie of Arendelle hahaha brilliant!

[@lucasman85]

And not the worst character either

[@SensuixShinobu7]

he was not in the worst film the moment the force awakens came out

[@WeedShaggy]

Jar Jar Binks > The Sequel Trilogy

[@atarifan80]

Episode 9 opening crawl FORGET EPISODE 8 Luke Skywalker is missing....

[@SkeloDevil601]

The FIRST ORDER reigns...

[@zachyysan3780]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[@LorenHelgeson]

13:20 - forget that. HOW is she able to fly back into the ship? I thought the cruiser was going fast enough to outrun the dreadnought. Everyone on that bridge was clearly blown far out into space. Do rebel cruiser have their own gravity wells to drag all debris along with them?

[@littlehorror1057]

Well, if you want a answer from the company that made this film. "THE FORCE". Because it's been nothing but used as a plot hole fix concept.

[@HerculesBallsInc]

It turns out that Leia was Mary Poppins all along!

[@SkaterBlades]

I think Rose would have been a somewhat decent character if she sacrificed herself. They couldn't kill Finn off since he has plot armour. It wouldn't have fixed the rest of her scenes but it would have been decent to see Rose complete the journey her sister completed at the start. Finn could be calling out to Rose, asking her not to do it, she shuts off her comms so he turns around to stop her but it's too late. Instead we got Rians dumbass scene

[@xFlareLeon]

Would make that protecting what we love line mildly less dumb. She would have died protecting the Rebelliosistance.

[@ericsbuds]

absolutely unacceptable. I agree on every point made.

[@yashanrikoudou5531]

ericsbuds Agreed!!!

[@monkeybreath21]

Suddenly Finn can fly a ship? He spent half of force awakens needing a pilot.

[@scottski02]

UGGGGGGHHHH! I swear, every time I think about this movie for more than two minutes I find at least five more plot holes. How did it sink this low? HOW?!

[@chrisk.5964]

next time i have electrical issues i think ill just shove my head into it

[@ciarangrainger2465]

The watermelon getting moldy is a perfect representation towards the growing repulsion a Star Wars fan felt as the movie continues until all goodwill for the franchise left.

[@caydenmarlowedefusco6798]

The Phantom Menace looking real good right about now

[@SkeloDevil601]

No. Just no. Just stop. Attack of the Clones is looking real good right about now.

[@124harryrr]

Cayden Defusco am I the only one who actually liked that movie?

[@caydenmarlowedefusco6798]

124harryrr I did

[@rokmare]

That movie gave us Jar Jar and Darth maul so it pretty much cancels each other out IMO.

[@leonvoulgaris322]

I liked Phantom Menace a lot. Dont give a f... what people say about it. I really enjoyed this movie and it had 2 great villains.

[@boombapbeatnik]

"This place is not Hoth, people. It is not Hoth. Anyway, on Hoth..." LMAO

[@MegaTechpc]

This rant has some of the greatest quotes I've ever heard in a KZbin video

[@MegaTechpc]

Already have and its also absolutely brilliant! Still think this rant is a little more quotable though...

[@134590174]

It's salt not snow. Right? I'm convinced it's salt. I wasn't sure, but I was told it was salt. How can I now be sure what I believe was snow on Hoth is snow? Maybe it's not snow, but a white spice. I'm so confused.

[@KaizerSozaye]

Screw Disney and The Adventures Of Mary Rey Sue Trilogy!! I miss George Lucas and the Prequels

[@xEcuador1]

Same :(

[@somedude5581]

Me to. I miss world building and character development. But that was swapped out and replaced with throw away dialogue and flashy scenes that make no sense. R.I.P Star Wars.

[@ARC--5973]

I miss the incredibly done lightsaber duels.

[@dirk_035]

Same :(

[@jadon7702]

Same here, dude.

[@JadenMoon1475]

*Luke:* "There's something not right here. I feel cold. Death." *Yoda:* "That place" *_Points to Disney Headquarters_* "is strong, with the Dark Side of the Force. A domain of evil, it is."

[@gallafia3771]

"Luke Skywalker did not die... and in the next scene Luke Skywalker dies" XD

[@Flashboy284]

GOTCHA

[@dougcrouse4392]

Flynn42z it's true the only question I asked in that movie what did they do to you Luke? Am I right?

[@99oildrops]

"WTF!??" xD

[@kuribayashi84]

Double Gotcha!

[@TheTschikof]

@@kuribayashi84 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@MrKajithecat]

I'm glad people are waking up and actually getting angry.

[@lepapanouwel4663]

MrKajithecat Ikr ? It's as if the shock was so powerful everyone had to take their time to properly hate the movie!

[@Hirnlego999]

It's also becoming a bandwagon which a lot of people will join simply because it's the "right" thing to do. And really, it's just a movie.

[@Hirnlego999]

Yes, like hating Nickelback, Justin Bieber. Most of mankind is just conformists, feeling a need to belong to the right groups. Which is also why a lot of youtube is a huge cesspool of people craving for attention and verification.

[@Hirnlego999]

Rey is a male actor? Just what the hell are you on? Let me guess, Alex Jones? Feel threatened?

[@Hirnlego999]

Bieber was hated before he tried to become more macho (Some form of envy is common, he sings some song and the girls swoon over him). Point stands, people tend to jump bandwagons. I'll admit that I don't like the new movie either, but this was my POV as I watched the movie but I can also say that it is only just a movie. It won't ruin my childhood nor will I want anyone fired for it. The happiness of my own life does not really depend at all based on this movie and the money wasted on the experience was not really worth it, but that's also true for a lot of things. Ultimately I think the main fault lies in that Disney is a company that plays it safe, they try maximize profits so they will make quite middle of the road quite uninteresting movies.

[@jockneyranger]

Cannot wait for the Unbridled Rage “series” for Rise of Skywalker! Will be epic! 😎😂

[@carealoo744]

I liked the yellow lightsaber...

[@DonVigaDeFierro]

"It's not destroying what you hate. It's saving what you love". Ah, now it makes more sense. Shrek just loved that giant first order cannon.