Max Payne - Nostalgia Critic

It made an awesome game, but the film version brought on a different kind of pain. Nostalgia Critic checks out Max Payne.
#MaxPayne
Max Payne is a 2008 neo-noir action thriller film based on the video game series of the same name developed by Remedy Entertainment and published by Rockstar Games. It was written by Beau Thorne and directed by John Moore. The film stars Mark Wahlberg in the title role as Max Payne, Mila Kunis as Mona Sax, Ludacris as Jim Bravura, and Beau Bridges as BB Hensley.
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[@ChannelAwesome]

New year. New season. New studio. NEW WALL COLOR?!?!??!? Vote in the comments what wall color we should have, White or the current wall color Grey.

[@wyattalford9064]

Do white

[@Anthony-nh6xf]

Puce

[@Name-fx4fh]

White

[@Melvinshermen]

Channel Awesome oh review Dennis the menace

[@weirdonation365]

It should be red!

[@MIKombat]

John Wick is closer to the Max Payne games than this movie.

[@KINDERGARTEN-COP]

Tru

[@Devilsblood]

You guys need to see Hard Boiled

[@Revan-eb1wb]

@Jackie Nova thank you. i always thought that sin city was the max payne movie we got^^ it is a shame that the mp movie was bad

[@jasoethesentienteyeshapedg4847]

@@Devilsblood Best shootout i have ever seen.

[@pestowsky4699]

actually watch "Payback" with Mel Gibson, this movie is the closest with noir mood and narration, give it a try

[@cryswhyle]

"Max Payne The Game is a better movie than Max Payne The Movie."

[@denlom549]

What part, el matador was not bad game, IMHO

[@BobMcBobJr]

This isn't Max Payne, it's a little bit uncomfortable.

[@CyberSpider35]

You are goddamn wright!

[@kevorka3281]

Can't that be said about pretty much every video game movie? They just can't seem to do it right. All the had to do was literally copy the story and noir feel and it would have been so much better. Why on Earth did they change the Valkyr drug from green to blue? I don't understand such a pointless change that even moreso distances the fans from what they want.

[@suzannemelique9912]

Crossed fan spoted!

[@chrisl1294]

The sad thing is that Max Payne had the potential to be an absolutely amazing movie. The majority of the awesome shit in the games comes from movies: the noir tone and narration, the intense John Woo style gunfights, the bullet time. But instead all we got was a boring drama with like, two or three action scenes that are too short to be cool, and don't get me started on the misuse of the bullet time and the miscasting.

[@dodgeworldl8470]

I found a quote from the director about the characters and the story of the game. "They were all dead. The final gunshot was an exclamation mark to everything that had led to this point. I released my finger from the trigger. And then it was over."

[@hasselett]

The dreadful miscasting of Payne. Mark Wahlberg is NOT Max Payne. He just isn't.

[@simple-commentator-not-rea7345]

John Wich and Hardcore Henry is what I expected a Max Payne movie to be

[@ColePhelps-cv2qh]

Think up some good casting for max payne.

[@KH0LRA]

James McAffrey did a stunning performance in the third game and I wish he wasn't just a cameo in the movie atleast :((

[@conyo985]

The movie fails because it's PG-13. The game is rated Mature. How the heck can you do the film justice? Stupid hollywood producers.

[@archivedaccount5990]

I felt the same way towards Mortal Kombat: Annihilation and Assassin's Creed.

[@NameEntry]

"Heck."

[@cubesolver64]

There's an unrated version.

[@ColePhelps-cv2qh]

Fuck you super hero movies. Idiots pulled a mortal combat.

[@never2be07]

This movie was a mess a little gore here and there wouldn't have saved this pile of shit, casting Marky Mark and Jackie Burkhart was bad enough on its own

[@yamimew6900]

She slapped him so hard, it made my video turn into an ad!

[@genosblondecyborg1865]

Same

[@HerrDeutschBlood]

Ditto

[@yamimew6900]

Ah! Who are you people and how did you get here?!

[@Jackw00pw00p2]

Yep me too.

[@nickhall8134]

Yep me too

[@TheUnusualSuspect]

The race between Wahlberg falling backwards and the Sloth was absolutely hilarious! Good stuff, haha :)

[@enriqueprieto2922]

Love your work Suspect. Hopefully one day we could see a collaboration between you and the critic. That would be my dream team-up.

[@jonathansefcik473]

Definitely!

[@garyking1986]

The Unusual Suspect great work on the spyro review!

[@montypigofthedoodleclan8659]

Oh my goodness, hello suspect! :D

[@gandalfczarny2289]

What? No!

[@KarstensCreationsKC]

That's a duck. That's a DUCK, man! Yes. Yes, it IS a duckman.

[@LordMoonshadowGaGa]

*Jason Alexander intensifies*

[@m1k3l1f3]

*quack*

[@malkrow21]

Dat's a duck! Dat's a tie! Dat's a desk! Dat's a dupid, dupid movie!

[@ezelfrancisco1349]

Duck is lord

[@pyguy7]

16:38 Just the fact the loading bar held on that last 1% made it all the more hilarious

[@DrOD-zx1yb]

As it does in game.

[@IonicHyperspace]

Doesn’t seem to be an issue when I play it on the Series X (Thanks to SSD)

[@IonicHyperspace]

The funny thing is too, is that the console versions have sub chapters so pretty much that cut off makes a whole lot of sense

[@BengalBoy16]

Don't you geniuses ever change.

[@SpiderGoblin2012]

If that was a question, it'd be a very confusing one

[@GdoubleWB]

"In one week it went from Snow to Rain FOUR TIMES?!" Yeah Doug, it's a meteorological phenomenon called "Calgary".

[@kommandantbaker]

I can confirm.

[@AerialSong]

I've never agreed with someone so much. I have way too much proof of this, being a Calgary native

[@ChakatStripedfur]

It's also called "Living in Kansas". The weather can go from snow, to rain, back to snow then be warm, all in the same week.

[@WingedFish66]

As an Ohioan I can confirm the weather can change to whatever the fuck it wants within the span of a week. In fact I've seen it go from snow, sleet, rain, then refreeze within a single day more than once.

[@Friendlysociopath]

Doesn't he live in Chicago? I figured surely they'd have this sort of thing happen every now and then?

[@VaDonteWilliams]

I really like The Nostalgia Critic loading screen.

[@jonathan34219]

When was that

[@Tangent_Pixel]

"But it was just snowing! But it was just raining!" Clearly; Critic has never been to Texas...

[@shealaya]

Or Wisconsin.

[@Fluffkitscripts]

Excuse me, only midwestern states such as Michigan allowed to claim they have random weather, thank you very much SIR. 🧐

[@saynomore8795]

@@Fluffkitscripts Exactly. In Ohio, we literally had a day of snow in the middle of may, and 2 days later a high of 90 degrees Farenheight

[@Fluffkitscripts]

or MA’AM.

[@eddiediaz5518]

Or Colorado

[@finaltouchstudio_]

The loading screens killed me 😆

[@life4fireforever273]

Review of 2004 a series of unfortunate events Agree??

[@larcen6206]

Me toooooo XD

[@ChrisNeufeldMusic]

The second loading screen had me like OH COME ON!! 😂

[@gianinabadami5341]

@@ChrisNeufeldMusic I love how as it started it sets up for an ad

[@crossfirehunter3652]

I hope you guys stayed for the Malcom audio at the end 😂😂😂😂😂

[@spookyfactory5827]

Honestly, that was my favourite part of the Review was just Malcom rambling

[@watersman9373]

I thought it was funny

[@jessehenson8923]

Didn't even show up, but stole the show.

[@2Scribble]

I was more amused by the Nostalgia Dad cameo at 27:06

[@ryanblack3686]

"They cut off a couple of my toes and sent them to those I love most, so I figured you guys wouldn't be in the mix. "

[@ThisAnimeGal]

“I was going to change the world with that wall!” -Nostalgia Critic 2019.

[@Angel_Billy4-30-23]

ThisAnimatedPhantom Yeah, he had me cracking up when he said some people take the color of their walls waaaaay too serious. Cuz everyone put in the comments that they didn't like the color of his wall so he changed it or would sometimes use a green screen instead.

[@liquorsnake]

Ahh the critic the weirdest area of the universe

[@ashipnerdoffical4260]

Huh, never thought I'd see you here. Small world.

[@psycholupus5697]

@@Angel_Billy4-30-23 not the only wall of his people dislike nowadays

[@harrymills2770]

@@Angel_Billy4-30-23 You'd be surprised at how much time and energy creative types will put into the decor.

[@feigekatarina5745]

Seriously I love the grey color, please don't change it. The white hurts my eyes, and grey matches the mood of Nostalgia Critic. Isn't it also mean to make him buy new white paint over and over again, just because? He's already done it, don't be mean and make him redo it.

[@sarasamaletdin4574]

Has he actually painted did rooms because people complained?

[@TimSlee1]

Nah, grey is boring. Have you seen the home rennovation shows? Every one of them uses grey!

[@TimSlee1]

@David Smith Eh, I guess he doesn't have to change it. But there is no harm in being a little creative.

[@republicazi32]

You're probably thinking of his 'The King and I ' review. It's one of the first reviews he did after bringing back the NC. I think it's season 6. Good episode.

[@AJ-cq5pw]

David Smith I mean grey isn’t really creative it’s just a boring color but I mean who cares? It’s just a wall we just have to get used it

[@emiliachabik1205]

Now some of you might be thinking: "Where's Bill? Haven't seen him in a while.", but what you need to understand is that Bill is always there, in our hearts...

[@willku9000]

Mhm 😎

[@awilmart]

dafuq guy of course. What's next, are you going to say there was a time when Bill wasn't on the show? He's been there since day 1, he just takes breaks from time to time.

[@jeniverevalearen5844]

Grey wall. It's easier on the eyes and brings more color to you. Grey is classy. Grey is sexy.

[@RhythmGrizz]

Slow down there, Anastasia

[@Sonichero151]

Much like Grey Delilse

[@matthewmoran5297]

+Jenivere Valearen Grey is a perfectly agreeable compromise. Grey is a good fusion of two opposite colors.

[@matthewmoran5297]

@@Sonichero151 I'm personally more of a Tara Strong fan, myself. Even she is going somewhat crazy.

[@benpowell-punmaster1214]

I think Edgar Wright would be a good director for a Max Payne film. With his style, I think he could pull of the comic book aesthetic.

[@liampatrick3110]

Scott Pilgrim VS The World: Am I a joke to you?

[@oak7741]

@@liampatrick3110 i think that’s an example of why he’d fit the role so well. especially with the artistic direction of max payne 3, with the flashy text and cool camerawork.

[@FiauraTheTankGirlGamer]

I must reference futurama now: "We kept it grey"That is all.

[@CMWaters910]

Here's my Futurama quote on the matter: I have no strong feelings one way or another.

[@shadowmariogalaxy64]

All I know is my gut says "maybe".

[@Jimmy_G412]

If I don't survive, tell my wife 'Hello'.

[@robbiewalker2831]

Fiaura The Tank Girl Who cares about the wall, what about Malcom?!? Will he be saved?!?

[@autobotproductions1244]

@@shadowmariogalaxy64 bite my shiny metal ass

[@LydiaTarine12]

"Uh... Ya think that's such a good idea? People weirdly take their wall color very seriously." ~snerk~

[@pompousbastard4902]

"In one week it went from snow to rain FOUR TIMES???" Oh Critic, you couldn't make it clearer that the Midwest is not a place you've been to :P

[@texasdaking88]

Or down south lol

[@gabesoda9332]

But they're from Chicago

[@c-force5217]

Or in Central New York

[@gianinabadami5341]

I've been living in Cape Cod for the past 16 years after living in California and I agree with you guys and with the NC

[@anikmonette2140]

In Qebec it goes from rain to snow to rain again in one afternoon. That's probably why our PSA are bonkers: if you survive the weather here it kinda leaves marks.

[@TheQuashingoftheTub]

I want to see Doug review "Who Killed Captain Alex." Everyone is having such a blast that it makes me happy every time I see it. He's gotta go in depth on the history of Wakaliwood, though, as it's really cool!

[@MegaSoulHero]

The first Nostalgia Critic video of 2019!

[@legoking6165]

And what a way to do it. With a less than stellar videogame movie.

[@wilkinscoffee7166]

Wait it's 2019???!!!!!!?!

[@TheGoMetal]

@@wilkinscoffee7166 lol yes

[@squidsquiddly5970]

Yep! And I loved the comedic timing in the skits! A great start to 2019! Maybe the only good thing about this year yet lol.

[@petersmith9254]

MegaSoulHero the worst

[@DamonBlackpool]

Shoot Em Up was a much better Max Payne movie than actual Max Payne.

[@veronicasilk8429]

Even Wanted was better than Max Payne, particularly when it comes to the bullet time.

[@JakNekon]

@@veronicasilk8429 I hated Wanted and it's "bullet curve" thing, and I still have to agree with you...

[@aaronking5640]

@@JakNekon I saw the movie before I read the comics, they turned a story about supervillains taking over their world and turned it into just assassins who are the supposed hands of fate. That still pisses me off

[@ididntmeantoshootthatvietn5012]

@@veronicasilk8429 wanted is a goofy but awesome action movie

[@HEYitzED]

John Wick was a better Max Payne movie than Max Payne.

[@apollorock3r244]

06:12 “If I’m more interested in him talking to Gumball about cable service, we have a problem”. XD

[@arthas640]

I'd actually love to see Gumball appear in the Max Payne world

[@gianinabadami5341]

I actually WAS interested in Mark Walberg talking to Gumball and I haven't even seen the cartoon

[@DrDolan2000]

"Is that Chris O'Donnell?" Chris O'Donnell: "No! N-no I-"

[@kraetyz]

That 90s anti-drug commercial was the most accurate shit I ever dun saw.

[@ahnifollett]

23:58 The Tom scream has be my favorite. 🤣

[@gianinabadami5341]

I love it every time it pops up in a review. Especially in the Alita Battle Angel when he didn't didn't even need to comment it in

[@pinkzeppelin98]

Aw dude. Snow to rain to snow to rain to snow is just New England weather. I imagine you guys only see Connecticut at ConnectiCon, but come here for the fall and winter and that's not even over 4 days, that's 12 hours here.

[@thehuffliestpuff2620]

Ian Butterfield that's also Indiana weather

[@pisces2569]

Ian Butterfield yeah but it takes place in NY not New England

[@pinkzeppelin98]

Eh, close enough.

[@SpaceCase132]

There’s a saying about the weather in Florida: “If you don’t like it, wait 5 minutes.”

[@matthewheinlen9164]

Space Case I’ve also heard that up here in the Pacific Northwest

[@Maniac4Bricks]

24:47 was he dumb enough to move slowly, or was Mila Kunis' character dumb enough to let him take out a gun?

[@tencents6]

Yes.

[@Eltrio2]

yes

[@Liowen]

If she shot him without him getting the gun it would be murder but him going for the gun would be considered self defense, it was his own fault for going so slowly.....also why am I putting actual thought into the Max Payne movie?

[@icecreamhero2375]

Why did critic put her in a box people can play what ever role they want.

[@dominickfinch5693]

icecream hero yes, people can play whatever role they want. He didn’t say she couldn’t. He said that she has to be cast as the right role to be good. No where did he say she couldn’t play whatever role she wanted.

[@EmmaAllisa358]

I'm always so focused on the critic that I don't even notice the background, if you painted it pink it would probably take 6 months before I even suspected something was different

[@WildWestSamurai]

13:30 "How can you trust a person who can't even apply his own scar makeup convincingly?" Um... Doug, that's Jamie Hector. Dude played a villain on HBO's The Wire. And that is his actual scar. That's not makeup.

[@SuperSwordman1]

It is an akward looking scar though

[@adamnsliceofcake6371]

I actually thought Mark Wahlberg was Mat Damon all the way until he said it was him! 😂

[@christopherlowery3797]

....How? 😅

[@danielanderson8322]

@@christopherlowery3797 Maybe Wahlberg leaves so little of an impression of his own, that it's so easy to put just about anyone that looks remotely like him in his place

[@kiramaxwell502]

Grey is good

[@avatarofpaine]

Nah, light brown for life.

[@dylan8736]

Grey is live

[@lucywalker4545]

I was more invested in the Where’s Malcolm story in this review rather than the actual plotline of the film they were reviewing 😂

[@blammowammo5886]

Why the fuck is that emoji there.

[@danielanderson8322]

I had a similar experience when NC did Freddy Got Fingered, despite loving the actual review

[@lizodonnell9436]

Easily the best integration of a Simpsons joke I’ve ever seen. Touché.

[@JakNekon]

Their guns aren't set to "hit behind him", it's just that special bullet attracting glass they use in movie office buildings

[@michaeltrapson]

They should make another movie and give it that same dark atmosphere as the first game. Get unknown or not well known actors to give it an authentic feel.

[@andrewisjesus]

Thats where you dont understand. Channel awesome is a movie critic, yet they cant successfully make a C movie anyone outside their fandom bubble could like. I was embarrassed by the last movie they tried to make

[@frightrider3525]

@@andrewisjesus They didn't suggest Channel Awesome does it.

[@Humble197]

@@andrewisjesus learn how to read dude.

[@thestwinner680]

@@andrewisjesus LOL "That's where *you* don't understand." ;)

[@Avenger85438]

And avoid desaturation and black and white, basically any crappy stylization. Just let it be a action filled story with a tortured hero.

[@ColonelFrontline1152]

4:10 - *"He said no. It was sad you want a coffee were out."* 12:59 - *"He miss. It was sad you want a beagle were out of those too."*

[@wattsink2009]

Colonel Frontline I think you need to hire a proofreader. Or disable autocorrect.

[@josmo1363]

21:22 Ok, *THAT* is now the new standard test to determine whether your slo-mo shot is too slow

[@themoviejudge557]

My screenwriting II professor actually worked on the set of this film, he said it was a constant mess and that the script was constantly being rewritten throughout filming.

[@Ryan_Duckworth]

Max Payne with the directors of John Wick would be amazing and could probably do the games a lot of justice with a good actor (not that Mark isn’t good, just someone that looks more like him?) It should include voice narration that sounds accurate to Max’s voice and have the same great writing in it.

[@bobjhones8990]

I very much agree

[@archivedaccount5990]

That sounds awesome. David Leitch proved his worth with Atomic Blonde and Deadpool 2, so I'd love to see him do a Max Payne movie.

[@omarreyes7626]

as long as hollywood doesn't acknowledge video-games as a legit form of entertainment we will always get mediocre videogame adaptations, seen the "detective pikachu" trailer? "based on the worldwide PHENOMENON" they don't even have the balls to say it was based on a video-game, as if being based on a video-game is something to be ashamed of, same thing happens with western movies based on anime, they always say "cultural phenomenon" instead of anime, how can you expect a good product if the people working on it are ashamed of it? And truth be told I'm honestly fine with this, right now video-games are in a possition that puts them on the same level as movies if not better, great scripts, awesome voice actors, motion capture, honestly most of the CGI looks way better in video-games than mutlimillion movies and music scores that can make jhon williams look like an amateur, I actually can't belive why people would be excited for videogame movie adaptations, they are huge downgrade IMO.

[@victorm152]

Give us Michael Madsen

[@Redflametrow]

Part of the problem with that is Keanu spent years actually going through military training. So you also need someone who trains that hard for that long for just one movie. So at that point you might just end up with Keanu doing it.

[@cobra4975]

Did......Tamara just shotgun pump a rifle?

[@StevenFallsOver]

She's been taking lessons from Shadow the Hedgehog.

[@Griffon29]

Twice!

[@DrewFr33m4nn]

lobelix11397 you mean shadow the edgehog?

[@seyyeddibaj9735]

The 3 Fr33m4nn you mean shadow the edgehog

[@jarrodedson5441]

@@seyyeddibaj9735 question

[@FirstnameLastname-bp2pg]

When you realize the bald guy’s weird stare at Max was over twice as long as his fight with him.

[@15oClock]

*Alex's widow slaps Max* Ad: You could use some Switchmas spirit!

[@gianinabadami5341]

Another great moment for an ad every time I've watched this review

[@mizukihozakai7417]

The end credits has more gunplay than the entire goddamn movie itself.

[@archivedaccount5990]

It's sad when the best part of the movie is the credits.

[@zom8979]

So the first 3/4 was nothing then the last 1/4 turned into Constantine I think this movie is confused

[@emberarmageddon9384]

Whalberg gets slapped and I get an ad... COINCIDENCE???? I THINK THE FRICK NOT!!

[@christopherlowery3797]

“The frick”

[@-Zikade-]

Me and my sister were like obsessed with the two first Max Payne games and re-played them so many times, always having fun. The movie though.... I think the most intense thing about it was me struggling not to fall asleep. (I lost that battle.)

[@FluuuffInari]

>In one week it went from rain to snow four times Clearly Critic has never lived in St. Louis

[@Xarschia]

Or Indianapolis.

[@matthewcooper4248]

Or Texas.

[@jacobmonks3722]

Or Michigan

[@GhostwolfNightmareShadow]

or oregon

[@exiledPostman]

Or North Carolina

[@DonaldAMisc]

Those damn Loading screens! They were so annoying in the games, and they still are today lol! XD

[@gothicMCRgirl]

Donald Arteaga Yeah, I feel like if this movie REALLY wanted to emulate the feel of the game, it should’ve had more loading screens.

[@fds7476]

You didn't like the Max Payne loading screens? ... BURN, INFIDEL!

[@oatz8449]

Donald Arteaga Me:sonic 06 flashbacks!!!

[@TheTuubster]

Mel Gibson would have been a perfect Max Payne (see "Payback"). The movie unfortunately focused on the wrong aspects of the Payne story plus it was miscast in all departments. "Max Payne" is a perfect example how casting can kill a movie.

[@TheMegazonyx]

Green, so you can do greenscreen stuff... Also, you can switch the colours on the walls on the fly... *Thumbs up this if you think* *the same as me!*

[@andrewkell2474]

Nice transition like the game at 16:40 Brought back memories of playing the game. And I thought my browser screwed up again till i realized what it was. Lol

[@marin3933]

Wait...Chris O Donnell (who played Dick Grayson AKA Robin) is playing a guy named Jason in this movie? Me thinks there is a Robin joke somewhere in there........

[@nealmcbealthenavysealicall794]

Or the press X to Jason portion of Heavy Rain

[@ethanor]

As if this movie is smart enough for that

[@Nikk-Astyr]

C'mon dude don't be a dick...

[@dogethestick6814]

@@Nikk-Astyr AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[@Nikk-Astyr]

@@dogethestick6814 sry i just had to XD

[@ahstinfixsnhc9765]

I absolutely loved Major Payne

[@johnathanholmes1297]

He said it wasn't that bad, so maybe I should tried it.

[@ahstinfixsnhc9765]

@@johnathanholmes1297 Major Payne is soooo funny and truly heartwarming I watched it as a kid and showed it to multiple friends

[@CommanderShepard-wq3wo]

You ever heard the story about ‘The Little Engine That Could’?

[@samuelbarber4154]

8:06 hey it's Harvey Bullock, looks like his old partner was Jim Gordon.

[@anubusx]

He cured himself of being a vampire.

[@TeyesonBee]

Hm. For some reason I thought this was directed by Uwe Boll. It's a bad video game movie from the 2000s, honest mistake.

[@hasselett]

Nah, budget's too high.

[@lord_vwphaeton1883]

If it WAS directed by Uwe Boll, it would've been MUCH better... As in 'So bad it's good' levels better...

[@20thcenturygoji234]

What a way to start NC 2019! I hope this will be the best year yet.

[@thefantasticretroreviewer3941]

New location, NEW EVERYTHING!!

[@alexandrudinca2884]

Santa Christ, how much do you guys make per month to afford such a large studio !?

[@LordMoonshadowGaGa]

Advertisement!

[@seanshogun1957]

STAMPS

[@lasarousi]

The illusion was great wasn't it?

[@mohammadwaled409]

@@lasarousi explain

[@TheREALSimagination]

"Sssssshuddup, Meg." No, but really, Mila Kunis is cool. She's alright.

[@manuliza6420]

She’s pretty hot too, and that death glare 11:24 mmmm

[@SchneeflockeMonsoon]

If Nostalgia Critic’s head has a landline, does that mean he can escape the Matrix whenever he wants?

[@Vivikatsidhe]

I guess so

[@marcguerra1854]

I don’t think I’ve ever clicked on a video so fast

[@yugotokusatsu289]

I'm gonna say faster than this movie's bullet time! XD

[@jamestrollip5997]

the Flash cant tap as fast as I can

[@CyberLance26]

Its annoying seeing this same comment over and over on so many videos.

[@virtue7574]

Same

[@aaron-n]

Critic didn't notice the sudden change from cloudy and snow to sunlight at the end; not to mention the instant accumulation of snow on Max's gun at 25:00.

[@mattmanley3520]

To be fair the AT&T ad with Gumball and Mark Whalberg is fanTASTIC

[@Chrisy45054]

Shadows in forms of winged demons? This film's supposed to be about Max Payne, not Devil May Cry.

[@danieljones361]

I would love the wall color to be a PALE BLUE, but between the two options I would pick GREY.

[@wyattbooth9918]

Daniel Jones no paint it green screen of nic cage!

[@superzilla784]

I would love to see a Old Vs New of Poltergeist. the 1982 Vs the 2015

[@christopherlowery3797]

Considering it’d mean he would get to tear into the new one, I’d love to see that too!

[@patrickrobinsob1464]

Sam Rockwell and Jared Harris had to carry that movie. It’s sad cause I actually thought Rockwell took the role cause he thought the script was good. Guess he needed the money.

[@tyrelllowery2074]

The genius of that highway construction joke around 13:45 was 👌🏿

[@Joker3384]

I’m starting to think the DC movies are looking at this movie and thinking, “Y’know what? We’re doing good.” Also, keep the wall grey!

[@TheRezro]

@Will 2139 You do know that it wasn't problem of this adaptation, because it was exactly how it was in the game? The problem was that game was famous from clever use of Bullet Time and Matrix Effects in times when it was new, when in the movie there is almost nothing from that. Furthermore they make ridiculous ideology regard Valkyrie, when it was primarily just a hallucinogenic drug and Max for large part of the game is under its influence. Otherwise it was quite standard revenge story, but with amazing melancholic mood. As someone said John Wick is way better adaptation then this drag..

[@HammeringHen]

9:53 Hits him so hard that it cuts to a add

[@PinkMawile]

So... You'll do an episode for Major Payne, right?

[@sconnor-pt4vt]

LMAO!!! You guys running was hilarious. 😂😂😂

[@kingeorge855]

I honestly believe that y’all should go crazy and have multicolored walls. Have each wall be a different color.

[@DepressyDuck]

Or only have 1 coloured wall, but colour it by throwing paint-filled water balloons at it. That's my plan for my place.

[@blondbraid7986]

@@DepressyDuck Or better yet, go full Jackson Pollock.

[@DepressyDuck]

@@blondbraid7986 That's the idea. By "1 coloured wall", I mean only 1 wall in the room that is coloured. In the UK, we call it a "feature wall", but I didn't know if America knew what that was. So I'm gonna fill balloons with different colour and throw them at 1 wall in my bedroom when I get my own place.

[@blondbraid7986]

@@DepressyDuck Yeah, I've seen it before but I didn't know there was a specific term for one colored wall.

[@bananawal8215]

Guys, don't worry about Malcolm. The guy can live without his nostrils, he wasn't even using them that much! It's fiiiiiine

[@wallyman292]

yeah. I'd definitely be more concerned over the adding of a third testicle just so they could take out more than two. . .

[@slimprimm]

wally man is incorrect, no testicle is better than two testicles. I learned that the hard way

[@CascadianRanger]

Eh, him and the others have died in so many ways, he knows he fine. Why hes so casual

[@rayyanqazi6863]

I know this is pretty late, but I wanted to know what music was used during the max and lupino staring scene

[@jackcutter2]

Max Payne PS2 was a better Max Payne movie than Max Payne

[@ItWILLbeWONDERFUL_THERE]

WOW!!! That IS a big studio! I'd lose my way in that place.

[@TheDragon1986]

Grey is timeless and not as boring as white or the Max Payne movie. Thanks for this review. Go for grey!

[@wyattbooth9918]

TheDragon1986 no paint it green screen of nic cage gif!

[@TheDragon1986]

@@wyattbooth9918 the grey... OFF! ;)

[@justinornelas8398]

Omg Malcolm’s message at the end was the best part of this episode 😂

[@miahthorpatrick1013]

13:50 That's my city, Doug! Of ALL the places in the country to find a construction area on the road, you picked my city!!

[@archivedaccount5990]

I was 12 when I first saw this movie... It was the most disappointing thing I've ever seen in my life.

[@cjnewman7550]

Cute profile pic. What is it?

[@SmashLiXs]

i'm sure you had worse disappointments after that

[@Ruukas9]

Then or until now?

[@cartmanrlsusall]

what about doom?

[@98953812]

Until the Resident Evil movies, right?

[@Tleilaxu0]

13:30 I think that's the actor's real-life scar. He had it in The Wire too.

[@WildWestSamurai]

It is his actual scar.

[@donttalktome9838]

@13:30 That is Jamie Hector & his scar is real, i think you haven't watched The Wire on HBO before.

[@randomguy2518]

The weather is perfectly in line with a typical Oregon winter

[@INoahGuy1]

You should keep the wall grey

[@AnarielAnastil]

I don't care about the wall color (was around all the way back when lots of people cared the first time, and I didn't care then, either), but since I've been given a choice . . . stick with grey? Always good to mix things up for the new year . . . in the most unimportant ways possible. *slow clap * Great review, though! That I did care about and enjoyed. Sloth bit was hilarious!

[@jackcutter2]

Why did they slow him down that much?! And why is it of him just falling?! I laughed so much I teared up

[@brettjohnson536]

17:37 Mate, that’s every other day in England. Lol.

[@Rogu75]

I really wonder if Critic realized ''Mute Baldy'', to call that character, was supposed to be Jack Lupino. You know, that mobster who got addicted to Valkyr so badly his mental stability dropped to the point where he became a worshipper of devils from different mythologies and saw himself as Fenrir, and was actually one of the best parts of the game. But who am I kidding? This movie is so awful we needed to search the wiki to realize that guy was Lupino.

[@Rogu75]

@RehlDregur the shielded Niup. Main villain ain't even Nicole Horne. It's B.B.

[@Fire_Summoner]

14:00 The Simpson joke was hilarious.

[@Nielzabub]

It was from one of my favorite episodes growing up.

[@veronicasilk8429]

I think Civvie 11 also made a few Simpsons references in that scene, too.

[@HajduDIGITAL]

The loading was perfectly timed.

[@DrDolan2000]

23:58 I think that one fits perfectly; thank you, Tom

[@kdsm6424]

Why is it snowing in here We're inside a building Where ever I go The snow follows And the snow smells like the wind And the wind smells like rain

[@naranciaisbestboi125]

So by that logic, if A=B and B=C, then the snow smells like rain.

[@karnak333]

13:29 ... That's not makeup. That's the actor's real scar. He's from The Wire.

[@RunyaEithelNar]

Jamie Hector :)

[@javianwilliams7463]

HOLY S-

[@hulktopf5031]

Guess what he got stuck on. The wire. Naaaah just kidding.

[@MrThankman360]

Yea, and currently on Bosch on Amazon Prime

[@robinlaceishere]

That meant he's dumb enough to think it's fake.

[@The_Sock_]

Lighting looks a lot better in the new room, actually. I approve. Actually the holding your breath when passing a graveyard thing was a pretty common superstition where I grew up. maybe it's a New York thing? [shrug]

[@drdino2002]

17:36 after experiencing this exact thing firsthand I can confirm it does feel like climate roulette.