Why You Care So Much About These 5 Things (and How To Stop)

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Don’t allow your life to be controlled by these 5 things.
In today’s episode, Mel reveals the 5 surprising things that you waste time and energy on right now.
You’ll be surprised by the sneaky things that are holding you back.
Here’s the thing: when you try to control everything, you can't focus on anything that's truly important.
By the end of this episode, you’ll learn the simple shifts that help you make room for the things that really matter.
This episode is a companion to Mel's brand new free training, Make It Happen.
This training is designed to help you make your next 6 months extraordinary. It includes a 29 page workbook and 2 video trainings that use the latest research to help you get clear about what you want and create a plan to make it happen.
And the cool part? It takes less than a minute for you to get started. Just sign up at www.melrobbins.com/makeithappen
For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page: www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/ep...
Follow The Mel Robbins Podcast on Instagram: / themelrobbinspodcast
I’m just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I’ll see you in the next episode.
In this episode:
00:00 Intro
01:05: An exciting free gift from Mel to you!
06:27: The first thing that you can’t control, but you CAN control whether it bothers you.
09:43: What happens to your brain when you do things you don’t want to do.
12:01: The second thing you try controlling is wasting your time.
13:06: How to reframe lost time as found time.
18:16: The third thing you’ll never be able to control, but you can control how much space you allow it to occupy.
19:00: The precious commodity that you’re giving away for free.
21:04: What researchers have found is happening to people who engage with social media passively.
25:20: The fourth thing you try to control is holding you back.
27:10: How to move past the things you regret.
28:54: The fifth thing that you can’t control, but you can influence it by what you do today.
29:13: How Mel can predict who you’re going to be six months from now.
31:40: How you can redirect your energy and time to make your life better.
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I have incredibly toxic family that I normally don’t bother with but my husband misses them and they insult me every chance they get.. this is literally the podcast I needed to help myself from not hurting so badly.

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I'm sorry but I don't understand why your husband misses your toxic family knowing they hurt you.I wonder if he's toxic to? forgive me for saying that but that's what popped into my head

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@carol-wy4qy I sure feel you on the toxic family, it's something I'm constantly trying to figure out the Why and overcome.

[@jazminshanady1639]

That's why I avoid starting drama but others are always judging and bothering me 🤷🙎

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1) the weather 2) how long you wait in line/queue 3) the headlines 4) the past 5) the future

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How to overcome the panic when each month you try to conceive and it does not happen ? It's not in our control but it makes you go crazy . Please create podcast on how to overcome sadness for women suffering fertility issues and how to move past that feeling and shine in different areas of your life.

[@grateful1609]

I had a job with a group of people that every year would complain from September to February about how much they hated it getting dark so early! I'm like- there are places on the planet you could move to.... it happens the exact same way every year! 🙄

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Lol!! 😂 Right!? I know many people like this!

[@taniaseal7154]

"The only way to move on from the things I regret is to move forward". I love that. Thank you 🙏 💖

[@HouseofHypnosis1]

Essentially, this is a message about acceptance. Aggravation and stress lies in resisting what it is. Let go and allow flow. There is peace in acceptance ❤

[@lukast5215]

“Weather or not it borders you” Sometimes It is the small thing which makes you smile and warm your heart 😊

[@dawnenns]

We can’t always control what happens but we can decide how we react to it. I need to remember this!!! Yes,I need to apply this patience….letting my blood pressure spike helps no one!

[@susansimpson9463]

I LOVE the rain, it's cleansing and refreshing and I especially LOVE thunderstorms!!

[@jackiedouglas4483]

I live in the wettest place on earth. It shapes you.

[@intelligentdiscontent4359]

I LOVE thunderstorms! And rainy days are always an opportunity even if it is a chance to do nothing.

[@dwayneconaway1733]

I always tell people the best vacations are the ones that don't go quite as planned. A good vacation where everything goes as planned it's a nice memory, but man when something goes wrong you laugh for years and years and years.

[@ChelleyV0807]

Ugh… the weather. After a stunning winter and spring in Phoenix, the temps are inching up and we are getting ready for our first triple digit day next week… the dread of the heat every year. Something for me to get present to and work this out for myself. I’ll never complain about the rain. The heat is another thing entirely.

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free fyi I absolutely love you my boyfriend of 11 years left me for a woman that he dated 30 years ago . she called him confessing her I'm dying love even though she's married she said she should never gotten married because she loves him her last child went to college to take the chance. they were talking for 4 months and then he ended up leaving me with an note it said turn that frown upside down you'll be happier someday. well because of that I found you and I absolutely adore you I've learned so much about myself in the world . that I would have never learned I also have ADD and you've really helped me my house is so clean .😊 my brain seems so much clearer I'm actually able to focus on getting some stuff done so I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart and let you know I love you to pieces you are amazing ❤️

[@camisebring1867]

AMEN❣️

[@susandowd1666]

Whatever you do don't take him back!

[@lahsan3686]

We got married in the rain…June in Vermont…pondside…in one of my favorite places with my favorite people…best day ever! 💖

[@elhamahmadinia753]

Hi Mel I love all your fantastic episodes Just wondering if you have any plan to produce an episode for new immigrants who are struggling with cultural shock and how adapt themselves with new environment? Thanks a lot in advance ❤

[@catherinegay1404]

I share your podcasts all the time. Love your wisdom & compassion SO much! ❤ At 66.5 yoa, I'm THINKING about getting into realty. Not sure if i have the energy, but the amount of time I've spent on social media, I could have gotten my license by now! 😂

[@tmc8484]

I have been trapped by the death of my 2 sons, the loss of numerous core people in my life, the loss of the one I thought protected my heart, my PTSD from racing around a hospital looking for a working crashcart for my patient crashing in the ER. My trauma fromm first hand experience in Covid then m own personal 2 year+ journey with Long Haul COVID…. My huge issue is I ISOLATE. I need true help in finding faith in this world again. I fixed myself from COVID but I am in a rut! I just found you! Thank you! I think you will help me. How do I get beyond my fear of getting COVID again and my health taking another dive. It’s nutty. Thank you! -TMc. ER-ICU RN

[@camisebring1867]

Most of All~ 🙏🏼THANK YOU MEL~ FOR BEING HERE 🌟❤🎉👍🏼🖐️🩵🧚🏻‍♀️

[@jazminshanady1639]

I recently found the podcast and try to constantly keep coming back here. I love podcasts and also listen to Spotify as well. They got audiobooks, podcasts

[@jazminshanady1639]

I don't have a lot of followers, barely got any views on videos I've posted

[@liagarcia2170]

On the days I commute to the office and sitting in LA traffic, I have either been listening to your podcasts and calling friends/family to keep in touch!

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Free Thank you for your commitment and service to bringing out subjects to lift us all-rising tide floats all boats 🎉

[@jennieoh8543]

Ear plugs work so well at night with a snoring partner!!!! I have learned so much from you Mel and thank you so very much :*)

[@belindaeylesdivineskybridg6160]

Did you make this episode for me? I feel like you’re personally talking to me at some points in this… I’m taking this in seriously having a look at myself. Yeah it’s okay I see and not only was I tested once but twice my birds even wanted to see how much patience I have. I think I might of f failed this test a few times I’m going to pass it next time. I think I was missing the message and then you come on to do this. I think the universe is trying to say something I know there’s no such thing as a coincidence nature can’t be telling me the same thing you’re telling me and they’re not be a correlation. Animals are great teachers. Thank you for helping me today. Yeah something big is going on and by the universe I am being help in more than one way. Thank you very much . I keep hearing a message in the back of my head, prepared the way❤

[@JillWaterman]

You are a gift, Mel. Thank you for being here every week ❤

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Hi mel career guidance video on urgent basis! Plz!

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I love you Mel ! Thank you so much for being there !

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Free. Every podcast is time well spent. Awesome.

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Thank you.x

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Thanks for that! You're great.

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Thanks you🙏

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Needed to hear this today! ❤

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Free. Thank you!

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This is amazing. Thanks Mel ❤

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Thank you mel ❤

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Mel. Thank you❤

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That's what I need rn. Thanks a lot.

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Thank you!

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Thank you so much, ma'am mhel ❤❤❤

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Excellent video !

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Thank you 🎉❤❤❤❤

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THANK YOU

[@Ricardos_ASMR_Relaxing_Space]

Thank so much, my backup in times when needed. ❤🎉

[@DJslifeisart]

Thank you so much Mel I just joined the training ❤

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Thank you so much. I’m signed up and ready for the Make it Happen course!

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Mel....You ARE The Best ✨

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Free, cant wait for this transformation with you Mel!! Thank you for caring for us.🥰

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Free thank you

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Mel, I really needed this podcast today. Thank you so much!!❤❤

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You have me so hooked. Diving in.

[@essence____beauty_92]

Definitely every thing you said 💯💯💯

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Thank you Mel❤ Your advice is very helpful during my tough times.

[@rajwant1110]

Mel you are lovely. So grateful to you for such incredible insights always❤

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Free Thank you in advance ☺️

[@yoli9617]

You’re my hero ! I listen to you all the time! We can’t control lot of things in life every bad thing that happens is for a very good reason! Keep up your amazing videos Mel!!

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Thank you so much 🙏🙏🙏 just signed up 🏋‍♀️👍

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Wooow❤ I love this podcast...it has so touching and motivating me🎉

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I love how you do these trainings. I am doing the Make it Happen course and love it Can’t wait for the second video ❤

[@mothercoyote351]

Hey Mel ❣️ I appreciate ur time & desire to help other ppl 😊❣️ Ur an amazing person & I look up to u.

[@patriciaschemenauer1064]

Thanks. You’ve really helped me. You’re positively and you are sooo funny.

[@lauriee4405]

Thank you for all you do, for so many. I continue to learn so much. I do fairly well with waiting in line/traffic and weather, but past regrets & future worries have been an issue with me. Your podcast are so helpful, I am making great progress in those areas. You are awesome, and if no one else tells you today, I want you to know that I love you and I have faith in you! growing up in Maine, totally understand about the weather - early or late season snow falls.

[@DJslifeisart]

Hi Mel thank you so much for your podcast and videos they are very helpful and you are amazing. ❤

[@sherryfelux-bell3150]

Mel I LOVE YOU!! thank you so much for being here for me. I always come to your podcasts to lift my spirits. You truly help me anchor myself. THANK YOU SO MUCH!

[@mariabanholzer7942]

Thank you Mel from South of France

[@susandowd1666]

Mel, You and I started 75 Hard About the same time. I started january 10th 2023. I did this with my kids that live in Phoenix. I, on the other hand live in the White mountains of arizona 6700 elevation. The first 9 out of 10 days.I walked in a snow storm or a blizzard!😂 I started high 5ing myself when I hit the bottom of my driveway all the way up to the mirror! When it got too late to walk out in the woods, I walked around my one acre lot for forty five minutes. I did the walk twice a day outside. You had just started your new podcast they are amazing to this day and they are what got me out the door. I couldn't wait to listen to you.I actually saved some up because I was walking everyday and your podcast was monday and thursday.The 2nd month I added weight trainig indoors. 75 Hard was one of the best things I have ever done and so encouraging to do with family and a friend. I lost 20 pounds, but it was a little too much for my 68 yr old face. It was the first time in my life I had to gain weight to look better! Anyway, that's not my point. .Walking in so many snow storms in 75 days I realize I could do anything. I just turned 69 And I think I just figured out what my last purposes are on this planet so im signing up for your class! I am so excited.🤸‍♀️🤸🤸‍♂️ I will keep you posted. Thank you, thank you.Thank you and I love you so much.❤ Your podcasts have changed my life for the better! Ps Every time I hear one of your Podcasts I want to put on my shoes and get out the door!😂

[@susandowd1666]

@Te_Le_Gram_Me_Mel_Robbins00 Is this really Mel?

[@denisemurdock4877]

I would love that Book Mel

[@PaperHaven246]

I love this. I have learned to be more perceptive during the moments I learned to slow down.

[@parasnipermore]

Free Thank you for your amazing content I don’t normally comment on KZbin or other social media sites cos connecting with others makes me anxious or I struggle to understand emotionally what people are talking about but your content really helps me to understand myself and why I struggle so much in life

[@lilibach1498]

Thank you dear! You're contributing for big and important changes in my life. 💞

[@bonniespruin6369]

Wow, I just had to go look up the anterior mid-cingulate cortex and save videos to watch about it. I love learning. I always learn things from you, Mel. We are taking care of our mom in her approaching last stages of Alzheimer's. I would be interested in learning more after this stage of my life. Things are hectic now, but I still love learning while I'm doing other things. Just can't let myself get to overwhelmed right now. Thanks again, Mel. Love you!

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I am still working on my make it happen. Goals at the moment it's day by day.

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FREE. Also, I love you, Mel!!!

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I love you Mel. Free ❤

[@WillowHopeBartlett]

I am making the decision to switch things up with a simple change: not waiting for the end of the day to relieve my pain stretching in the hot tub. It’s been more helpful than any pain medicine, so why have I been restricting myself to endure the day before relief? I’m changing my routine, and maybe that includes tonight’s hot tub time, but if I know it helps, I am not wasting time to push through to (the end of day future), but doing something as soon as this video ends! I am confident this simple choice to get off KZbin scrolling the shorts and taking charge.

[@WillowHopeBartlett]

@Te_Le_Gram_Me_Mel_Robbins00 is this reply legit and from Mel?

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Free !

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Thank you Mel from the Philippines with love❤ im excited to take that training and #MakeItHappen!

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Hi kabayan… cheers to a very blessed and productive year for all 🎉

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@@kaztech36 hello kabayan😊 yesss lets make it happen!

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Free Thank you Mel! You are awesome, and if no one else tells you today, I want you to know that I love you and I have faith in you!

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Free ❤

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❤🎉 already share this video.

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Mel, please revisit procrastination in a solo episode or with a different guest! ❤

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mehl you look stunning on this one 🥰🥰

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Free.

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[@sherryfelux-bell3150]

Hi 👋. I’m 46 yo woman who’s been teaching for over 17 years. I’ve got roughly 7 years before I can retire. I always tell others it’s never too late to do anything. But I’m tired, and not sure how wise it would be to get that masters I’ve always wanted from the university I’ve dreamt about getting it from. Is it worth it at this point? What do y’all think? ❤

[@tinabinsc1935]

If you want this for your own personal satisfaction, then go for it. If you are doing it solely for career advancement this close to ending your career, I would out those resources towards planning for life after you leave teaching. Do what feels best to you. It's an enormous expense both with time and money. You deserve to do what makes YOU happy! Good luck!

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Free 💕😊

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don't drive in snow but my friend does so off to the cruise we went in a snow storm 😂

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have a great day ✨

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Hey Mel I’m one among them who did signup last week😂😂

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FREE, I want to make my life extraordinary

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The only time i could run full 10km was in the rain and it was awesome! :D

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My husband wears sweats every day too. To get him to wear jeans is a real feat!!!

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Please send me the link to Make It Happen.

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I just signed up for the class and cant get it to work! Help!!

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IS there a way to read transcript of shows

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Guide

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In in the Catskills park complaining as I did a ground hog shadow retreat into the house to hibernate