Menopause symptoms and their impact on some divorces

[@askewopal]

I'd argue it's not their inability to enjoy relations, but their husbands not understanding or not caring and forcing it on them anyway.

[@IxAMxSMILEY]

Yeah my aunt literally got broken up with because she wasn't having sex enough and she's 63. Men suck lol

[@gaiagoddess8009]

Exactly. I had Hashimoto's at age 36( didn't know it at the time) but my (now ex) husband thought that my gaining weight, sluggishness, and inability to work 2 jobs, take care of the kids and provide sex meant I didn't love him. I sought medical advice, but even my doctors didn't think to test antibodies. My ex didn't care. He thought I was weak in the mind and that if I loved him, I'd be doing everything to please him. Even if we had found out sooner, it wouldn't have mattered. He showed me exactly who he was, and I did divorce him at age 40.

[@Godisgreat-7777]

Agreed!!

[@JayValmire]

Sex and love are two different things. True love comes over time and gets better. Divorce was unheard of a century ago. Love is true when it endures after the sex ends. Marriage and family is a forgotten institution.

[@bmbarnum]

Or he gets big ideas of new things he wants done in the bedroom that are outside her comfort zone (or even against her morals) that make her feel like dirt - but this can happen to ANY woman at ANY age group.

[@ElleOscar]

I sought help, since night sweats(@35) and my Doctor, said, I was to young to have them. I said, well tell that to my body. 54 now and still NO Doctor. So thankful for your Channel.

[@andreajordan6341]

Same thing happened to me!! I'm still angry about it. 🫤

[@jwhalen111]

Same here! My estrogen started dropping at 29!! By 35 I had severe hot flashes and soaked my bed with sweat

[@ShanteBarze1950]

Same with me, that's when things started with Me, I'm 39 now an I had to stop telling people that I was in Perimenopause stage bc they said I'm too young for that. According to Genetics if your Grandma or Mom started their Cycle at a young age, most likley you will start Perimenopause young, but I've researched that some could start Perimenopause in their 20s or at around 18 yrs old, an even that is rare.

[@Godskeiki]

Get a new doctor

[@Godskeiki]

​@@andreajordan6341 I hope you've since switched doctors. (?)

[@TheHouseThatBuiltMe406]

Mmmm? I divorced my ex when I was 47. My ex blamed it on menopause and proceeded to diagnose and treat me by telling me , all I needed was a hormone pill - aka (chill pill) and I would feel better. I divorced his ass and went on to an on going 11 yr relationship with a much better man without hormone therapy. Granted I am on estrogen cream now which helps a lot with daily vaginal pain and sexual pain. It’s the menopause that gives us the strength of not putting up with a bad marriage not from vaginal pain..trust me, we gave up sex long before menopausal symptoms because we don’t like the man we married . Menopause gave me my freedom back!

[@EleanorDeakinPoet]

Exactly. I’m still not even in menopause but my idiot ex went around telling people I basically went nuts because of menopause. 😂 Said the same about his previous ex-wife. Ridiculous. I don’t like this legitimizing of blaming everything on hormones for women. A decent man doesn’t have a divorce filed on him for nothing.

[@moose2154]

Nah, I don't think so...50ish is when the last kids launch, and we were done with his BS 20 years ago!

[@ElleOscar]

😂😂

[@gaiagoddess8009]

❤❤❤ YAAAASSSSS!

[@joycetheobald1717]

My husband of 33 years has diabetes that he barely takes seriously, I'm dealing with menopausal symptoms and his rages and my avoidance of his diabetic rages is fueling some issues. I can now see why "Gray Divorce" happens.

[@EleanorDeakinPoet]

Yep, it’s not women’s hormones causing it. 🙄

[@Godskeiki]

Diabetic rages? What do you mean? My husband had Diabetes and neuropathy. I don't think I ever dealt with the rages. I've never heard of that.

[@lindamza]

On the other hand, I wouldn't want to stay married to a guy that gives me a hard time for not enjoying relations...

[@MommaARA]

Remember, women DO seek out medical help more than men, but get dismissed for their complaints and either put on antidepressants or condescended to even by female doctors. Women's health and changes have been a nonconcern by the medical community for decades. I've had 9 years of being dismissed and the reasons being dumped on diet and exercise. Even when bad things were happening all I got was shoulder shrugs. No one has cared about my suffering. I can see how men who equally don't know what's going on would think their wives have just given up, become impossible and unattractive.

[@TheSexDoctor]

Very good points. Thank you for sharing. What an awful experience and women have suffered for too long. Now we can advocate for ourselves and demand the treatment that we need. Dr. Haver is my doctor and she is doing the world a great service.

[@indianne9781]

Yeah, remarried in my early 40’s, “relations” were nigh impossible. Think square peg/round hole. Stupid gyno (male, of course) told me I just needed “more 4 play”. Um, no, I needed my darn hormones back!

[@karenmariewagstaff5746]

It’s manopause that is the cause not menopause

[@lins2436]

Manopause - love it! 😂 👏 👏 👏

[@evelina2363]

As I commented on another video, women can experience vaginal pain way before menopause due to many issues and their man still love them and nurture the relationship. It’s when there is no effort to be in the relationship, understand the other person and make the other person feel loved that the relationship ends.

[@bbttresidder7224]

I absolutely agree. Sex was painful, like it really hurt and when I told my husband he was very sympathetic. I spoke with my other girlfriends and they were the ones to tell me to tell my OBGYN. What a game changer! We now have wonderful, pain-free sex and it’s actually better than when we were younger. Not frequent, we’re still 65 after all, but once a week and really good. Get help women, it can be the best thing for a marriage and YOURSELF!

[@kittenleo28]

What is the treatment for this? I'm 45, and after having symptoms for quite possibly the past 10 years, I'm learning so much! I want to be able to say what you're saying here in this comment so badly, but I'm really weird about treatment. I'm an herbalist, and I don't like pharmaceuticals. Appreciate you sharing your experience ❤

[@TheSexDoctor]

Yay!!!🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@XYZOxyz]

So what kind of treatment are you on?

[@nvh682]

It has to do with men, not with our menopause, darling😂

[@TheSexDoctor]

True in many cases. And we as women have a choice.

[@jenniferbloh-michael8662]

No. We just literally can't keep listening to all the ridiculous nonsense. I left still getting called sweet fuc , so yeah , no not in my case. It was narcissistic abuse. Unchecked for 20 years.

[@Godskeiki]

I'm glad you got away. ❤

[@tosh471]

I'm all for women getting help with the challenges of menopause, and I imagine that 'might' improve their relationships - but this wasn't the way to talk about that. Are we helping women, or are we as a society trying to find ways to wring out *more* use out women as they age, so they can serve men some more? Like why would you tie this to women getting divorces as they age? The implication undermines women's decisions on the topic. It harkens back to all the ways men and society have historically undermined women's decisions for their benefit. Like - let women's health be about women.

[@MommaARA]

Feels that way

[@TheSexDoctor]

Wemomen are living longer but with poorer quality of life and health outcomes later in life due to estrogen deficiency. If we can live without osteopenia, osteoporosis, dementia, etc until we die and MHT can help us be healthy and feel better in our golden years, why wouldn't we embrace it?

[@ElizabethJetter]

It's not because of sex. It's because they're married in the context of a strong patriarchy that conditions men to view women as less human than themselves (at best) and as convenient appliences. Women get tired of it long ago, but are faced with extreme challenges (financial dependency, passed over professional opportunities, court ordered 50-50 custody with an abusive or ineffective co-parent...). Kids move out at menopause and they're done parenting and tip toeing around their man child husband.

[@jwhalen111]

It's that or they are finding their worth and what they deserve

[@Avs-cr1jf]

I'm afraid I don't agree with this maybe for some women - most realise what they've put up with - and frankly they want better!!!!

[@TheSexDoctor]

True. It can be both, though. I see it all the time in my practice.

[@linetteswanson3447]

I think some really don't care. I am doing my best to enjoy life in my fifties.

[@TheSexDoctor]

🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@esta8651]

This is a horrible take. I’m glad women can get divorced. It’s not just menopause.

[@yvettebennett6170]

Women have menopause and men have menopause. Women are not the only ones who change. I have been in marriage counseling for 1-1/2yrs. It's a lot of work to make a marriage work. Sex is only part of it in my experience and opinion. Some men treat their wives bad. Some women treat their husband's bad. It works both ways.

[@TheYazmanian]

I find it incredibly depressing that a man will not stay with his wife if he's not getting sex. I know that's a basic need in a romantic relationship but it's still depressing to feel as though it's so transactional.

[@blueseptember2174]

I thought it was him cheating on me 😂 "Bedtime"was not lacking over here and i was enjoying it. Thats also one of the griefs i have now to this day is i miss him and "that too". I dont miss the abuse! Abuse is the reason not menopause.

[@TheYazmanian]

Abuse can be a reason and also menopause. Not everyone has the same experience

[@blueseptember2174]

@TheYazmanian no, it's abuse. Hands down.

[@TheYazmanian]

@@blueseptember2174 lol are you trolling? Abuse isn't the only reason marriages end

[@cm4882]

Um, Yeah. Post surgical menopause here. I'm excited to no longer have elephant ears. Thank you very much

[@stephanienewton6618]

Yeah but we also enter our “I’m taking no more 💩” phase at this age.

[@TheSnerggly]

Thank you for addressing this issue. Last week or so Brooke Shields was quoted in a magazine as saying, "I need lotions and potions before I have sex," loosely quoted. I completely agree with her; I have to do the same thing. My own doctor refuses to help me, and it's very sad. I may pay out of pocket to go to my own doctor.

[@tillygirl7450]

Soooo, maybe NOW predominantly male medical society AND the pharmaceutical industry will get on board - it seems only when it benefits them they’ll be on board to help women.🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞❤

[@TheSexDoctor]

🎉

[@gottstreetblues2020]

I have that and because of breast cancer in 2014 I have been told so couldn’t use anything for help. It’s not just that my husband gets on my damn nerves with his BS. It’s not just because of hormonal issues.

[@NCYogini]

Please look into topical estrogen creams. They have been deemed safe for women with breast cancer…. Don’t listen to me. Talk to your doctor. It will help with UTI’s as well. Good luck. Sounds like you have been through a lot.

[@gottstreetblues2020]

@ my doctor said no to the creams.

[@NCYogini]

@@gottstreetblues2020 sorry

[@zina2800]

this is 100% true

[@susieedminster3822]

What kind of doctor should a woman go see to find if she has this problem?

[@edhabt7695]

Gynecologist

[@TheSexDoctor]

Menopause specialist.

[@Godskeiki]

So whats the answer???

[@kchoisi]

Ooooooo my God! I have said this. Yes, yes, yes... And please talk about that vagus nerve connected to the brain. That'll have you so depressed 😔

[@micheledaniels4682]

Facts!

[@Leo-mr1qz]

That's very sad! 💔

[@devsai21]

I agree 100 percent

[@mariatangi5773]

As I read ur comments I remember observing woman who pull in the money have business will not be treated as inanimate objects and will pull that respect and count in a relationship, love shouldn't have to be th hat way all sailors but the faces r different😢!

[@culturedancer]

Does she tell her clients this or does she capitalize on it?

[@thill5108]

I’m single and don’t want to get married because of it. I’m seriously looking forward to HRT because I want to get married , eventually.

[@kalpana1180]

Yes but that is just one symptom and all the untreated symptoms can lead to it

[@chicachchicaprods]

Wow, no way. 😮

[@GeorginaJett]

Bollocks as we say in the 🇬🇧

[@Moniek-ud8hx]

I have 0 seks drive since i got out my operation!

[@bearybullish7823]

Blaming women....as always

[@NCYogini]

This is unbelievably insulting. If you think sex is the reason 50 and 60 year old women are divorcing, you are delusional or have something to sell them. This is the last video of yours I will ever watch.

[@bmbarnum]

She's only repeating what a divorce lawyer said. Those divorcees aren't Dr. MCH's patients. Speculation is not automatic fact.

[@NCYogini]

@ 🙄sure

[@TheSexDoctor]

I see women, men and couples in my practice. Although the reasons for relationship dissatisfaction are usually multifactorial, the death of sex and most importantly intimacy is the chief complaint of both men and women.

[@NCYogini]

@ This is it. The reasons for loss of intimacy and trust is a major factor in the death of sex. It’s complex, but it’s possible to navigate an aging, changing body when there is trust, caring, support and communication in the relationship. To imply a woman’s aging body is what ends most relationships…. 🤬

[@TheReasonableSkeptic-ii4te]

So true. Also so true, some women are just jerks, who file for divorce and then violate their divorce agreements, leading to sanctions by the Court. Good luck, guys.

[@phillipsmom6252]

You’re a doctor? 😂😂😂