my bearded dragon died

[@crazy86753]

I'm sorry for your loss.... Last month my green tree frog got out of it's enclosure, and I couldn't find it. After a couple of days I gave up looking because they can dry out pretty quick. Couple of weeks later I was misting my salamander tank and I happened to look down and sure enough my green tree frog was chilling out in the salamander tank. Got lucky with it also and I was glad it didn't end up going into my turtle tank instead....

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

As a heads up, I won’t be replying to comments unless it calls for it. I want to thank you in advance for your kind words. I just can’t grieve a third time, this is all very painful. Please watch the entire video so you can hear my message about the future of Jessica’s animal friends. Thank you

[@ripbeni6198]

I understand Jessica. Mine died in september. Man, was I crying and sending essays of grieving to my friends. She ran out of my hand becuase I was cleaning her face under my sink. Poor thing thought I was probably water boarding her, anyways, I guess her stress response lagged and seconds later she ran off my hand, I was like 3ft up, and I tried to catch I think (house was dimly lit) and she felll on her back. My fiancé and I did EVERYTHING money could buy with vet care, but to no avail, this was (by healthcare background and vet diagnostic labs) a cause of death via acute kidney injury. And if you look where the kidneys are located, you'd understand. Imagine my guilt too. But, I'm not God, I err. My eyes are only on heaven and though the creatures' destiny isn't heaven (they have material souls of which is determinant on their matter, aka their bodies' state of life or death, so when they die, so too do their souls), I'm still interested in how the "New Creation" of Revelation will shake out. Maybe I'll see you Daisy, but if not, you taught me something about God, through the beauty and innocence of His creation. She is now cremated and resides on our TV stand in an engraved box. God love you Jessica, you grieve because you were made for love. Ultimately, love of God. So, come home, He's waiting for you. Sorry for your loss. A sincere catholic

[@ColdBloodCreations]

Young lady, my heart goes out to you. I don't say that I know how YOU feel, but I can tell you I have grieved the loss of animals many times throughout the years. If we could be of help to you, I would offer to talk or to listen. From one reptile channel to another. We seek nothing but to be a help anyway we can.

[@ripbeni6198]

@@ColdBloodCreations Love that, and your channel is one of the most informative and especially wholesome reptile channels. Loving, salt of the earth, family.

[@ColdBloodCreations]

@@ripbeni6198 Awe. Thank you. I appreciate that.

[@EmpressOfExile206]

I just stumbled on your channel and I just wanted to say that having passion for something and strong/fluctuating emotions come hand-in-hand, you can't have one without the other‼️Also, i'd hate to see you lose your passion for these wonderful animals and if you think it's too emotionally taxing for you to lose them unexpectedly then maybe rethink taking on special needs/neglected animals. I say that only because it takes a certain mindset to be able to constantly subject yourself to the inevitability of loss when your taking on animals that are fighting an uphill battle to begin with That being said, you've done a amazing job with all the animals in your care and if I had to bet, I'd say they're all happily in the best homes they could've hoped for! 🙏🏽 (p.s. I made another comment on this video, the 1st half of which, I think could definitely be helpful info for you)

[@reptileguy8458]

Accidents happen sometimes. Don't be so hard on yourself. The care and QUALITY OF LIFE that you provide for your animals is sooo great! Way better than most other people give.

[@Rotsuoy]

You have absolutely zero reason to apologize and I completely understand. Take care of yourself and your reptile babies. We'll be here when you get back.

[@IsabellaGenua]

I just lost my beardie last week due to an infection and it was unexpected. I kept blaming myself that me and my family should have noticed the signs, and only to be seen the last day of his life on earth. I am so glad you are telling us and the pain and regrets are real. Please take time to grieve and be with loved ones. My condolences

[@leopardgeckotalk]

Girl, I'm crying, I'm so sorry :( I know this certainly doesn't make anything better, but at least Nova didn't suffer, it was quick. I try to remind myself this when it comes to losing Ziggy. Nevertheless, it still tough :( always here if you need me ❤

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

Thank you my friend ❤️

[@Yoshoggutha]

Somewhere in the universe, all the animals we've cared for and lost are out there watching over us. You both are saints in my eyes, and I'm sobbing as I write this. 💔❤️‍🔥

[@Simonpetunia]

I am so very very sorry😢 you are an angel for the helpless. I don’t know how you do it. You can’t love that deeply and care that much and not have it take everything out of you…just drains you completely. You are a hero in my book. Animals are everything to me. I delight and am amazing By God’s creation. There are no words to describe how deeply we connect with these beautiful creatures…Just no words.❤ Anyway my heart resonated with yours when I watched this video. I know it was three months ago but the pain is still there. Remember you’re probably experiencing some post traumatic stress because what you do is intense and the anxiety is a very real thing.. it can debilitate you. I hope you take super good care of yourself and take respite when you need it. Anything to alleviate anxiety. I have to be treated for mine and it’s very real and it’s scary So take good care. Anyway, bless you bless you so much💕💕💕❤

[@Yoshoggutha]

@@Simonpetunia 🥺💖

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

@@Simonpetunia thank you ❤️ I actually started therapy recently, so I am most definitely trying to take care of myself. Long overdue unfortunately, haha. I appreciate you and all your kind words ❤️

[@spearmanerica676]

Jessica I’m soo saddened too hear the bad news. My condolences 💐 on ur lost of ur very important reptiles ur baby reptiles I’m gonna 🙏🏾💔for ur 💔too heal❤

[@tpiphdeel657]

I’m so sorry for your losses. Regardless of how it happens, losing a beloved pet is always hard. I know there is nothing I could say to you that would ease the pain that you are feeling…. I hope that you heal and recover quickly hun. My heart breaks for you, (even though I dont know you personally) because all of my animals are my family to me and I totally understand what you’re saying in this video. You take the time you need for yourself and you have nothing to apologize for. Take care of yourself!

[@azuradawn5683]

Oh Jessica I'm so sorry... I know you said you aren't reading comments, but I hope you know that so many of us are here sending you all the love and good vibes..

[@kellytaylor8980]

My babies are my whole world, I know first hand the anxiety & worry that comes with loving our little reptile friends, the loss of one of our babies is just unimaginable pain but the joy we get from them while they are alive and the joy we give them is precious at its core! Big hugs XX

[@danielanoll4069]

Hey Jessica, I'm so sorry. Only just found your channel. You're only being sensible, there's only so much you can take on, and you need to look after yourself to help others. Never think that you're not doing enough, you are amazing! Take good care of yourself and your friends, and I'll be happy to see more when you are ready.

[@sophiepowell7495]

I honestly think people underestimate how much effort taking on so many animals takes, especially emotionally, I hope you’re doing okay take your time 🤍

[@BlackKoiRecords]

I know your pain. Mine passed last year. She was EASILY my sweetest pet! I wish all households could have one at least once in their lives. Glad that mine "Hokage" was a part of mine! ❤️

[@KatieSTaylorWrites]

I know this is 4 months old, but I grieve for and with you. This video resonated deeply with me due to my losses, and the most recent was my heart ferret three weeks ago. I went to feed them dinner and found my heart ferret unexpectedly and suddenly passed away… I was devastated and still am. Do not apologize for how you feel and or the decisions you’ made. It’s hard not to. But you’re an amazing person with a big heart and love your animals. That’s beyond obvious. I understand how you feel because losing my Pippin really broke something in me. Animals are so precious, and the bonds we create with them indescribable. Anyway, I won’t dribble on. ❤❤

[@sweetluvgurl]

I’m so sorry. Mistakes happen. You’re human. Please try to forgive yourself and give yourself grace, Jessica. 💕

[@ProfJCsCritters]

Taking care of yourself comes first. Always. I also think there's a lot of value in what you've posted here. I talk to a lot of novice keepers (sometimes even people rehoming to me) who have a very narrow understanding of reptile keeping that's largely formed by curated media on instagram and youtube. They get to see the cute and easy and successful side that makes it into social media, and they're sometimes completely unaware of the EVERYTHING ELSE that people and animals can experience. There are challenges and heartaches and sicknesses, or even little things like bearded dragons that dislike handling (unlike whatever memes are going viral this week), and people need a well-rounded picture. People sharing the bad and the sad, as well as the good, is really important. So thank you for that.

[@joesjoes20]

I think you're doing better work than you give yourself credit for. You give a truly loving home to animals that many would turn away. We're all here for you ♥

[@wendyporter1093]

I’m so sorry about Nova’s passing. I lost my dragon, Chimera, just a few weeks ago, adter an entire year of rehabilitation. I managed to brong him back from the brink twice, but the third time took him from me. I know firsthand how gutted and devastated you feel. Please don’t forget you’re an amazing reptile keeper, and you always go the extra mile in whatever they need. I hope when you’re ready, you’ll have another dragon to enrich your life in ways only a dragon can. Nova and Franklin are no doubt bragging about what wonderful lives you gave them! Take care of yourself! ❤❤❤❤❤

[@erintraicene7422]

The positive here is your recognizing your state of being is in jeopardy and that something must change . That’s HUGE Jess. I wish I could comfort you. I will send positive vibes your way. And I’ll keep you on my mind.

[@juliamcshits1323]

I feel the same way. 6 very precious pets in 2 Years. Most were rescues and had preexisting issues and preventive medicine but I still panicked and ran to the vets, ext. I broke and my family was worried about me, unfortunately.

[@juliamcshits1323]

It's terrifying that you bring up how they die in multiples. I call it the terrifying threes because it's sadly always 3 in a row for me 😭

[@snazzyblisss]

Aww omg, I am so sorry to hear:( I bet she had the best beardie life that you gave her and lots of love

[@KarinaCombat]

I'm so sorry for your loss, reptiles really hold a special place in their owner's heart. You are an amazing keeper and even though people say reptiles can't feel love, I'm sure yours can feel how much time and care you pour into them. No matter how long you take to recuperate, your videos are always there to help others in need while you rest. You have no reason to apologize to your viewers, I'm sure we'll all be here when you get back. Your channel is awesome, but so are you as a person. Take care of yourself

[@CallumJamesCasey]

Despite all of the hardships you have been through, you're incredible. I have learned so much from you, recommended so many others to your channel because you are an advocate for better husbandry and so much in the community. I can't tell you how inspired I am by you and your ability to make videos like this that allow you to be vulnerable and talk about your experiences. As I tell my students, have grace with yourself. Easier said than done, but I want you to know that I have been positively impacted by you and all you do for the reptile community. I hear you and I hope you feel the support and love that we send your way. I also know how you feel. I lost my crested gecko, Nero, unexpectedly. I am still devastated. But it is people with a platform like you who give us reptile/amphibian keepers a place where we can find solace in each other and support one another. So thank you. From the bottom of my heart, for doing everything you do, even when it's been one of the most challenging things to do.

[@itssassysarah]

I’m so sorry Jess. I lost my Hognose snake just over a week ago, she wasn’t even 2 years old. She was always a weak snake and I invested so much care into her, it devastated me to lose her so I can’t even imagine losing 2 animals. Take as much time as you need, focus on yourself. Sending you so much love❤

[@Maevenish]

You sound just like me after my daughter's Beardie died. It was so sudden. We were able to get to the ER Vet but we made the decision to put her down the next day. Sometimes it's just their time. And it hurts so much. My heart goes out to you. It's not your fault. Take care of yourself.

[@lemonlizard1]

Beardies are amazing pets but when they are sick, they don't show symptoms until it's too late

[@ksrksr547]

Idk if you'll ever see this, but my heart is breaking for you. Ever since I got my Leopard Gecko, Layne, in 2019, your videos have helped so much... just recently, my gecko was taken to the vet because he had diarrhea... he is all better now, but I will never ever forget the anxiety it caused me for weeks. I vowed i would never own another reptile for the sake of my sanity... I feel your pain. I hope you find time to heal. You're truly inspiring and so caring. I'm sorry this has happened to you.. trust me, you have helped so many people. Anxiety is a bitch. Keep your head up.. you're not alone.

[@dereksmyth8596]

My 1st one died last year. The advice to let them eat as much as they can in 15 minutes caused my Shenron to pass at 8 months and it still tears me apart every day. We tried for months to save his life. The worst part was that his bloodwork all came back good from his treatments even his uric acid. 3 days later he passed. I'm very sorry for your losses.

[@KittenCece]

Guarding and prioritizing yourself is so important. You can only give when your cup is full. You have a lot on your plate & you are doing immense good. The world will keep turning even with your doors closed ✨️ Focus on you, and let yourself love who you have now 💕 Take care 🙂 And give yourself space and grace.

[@lorf5559]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing that many animals in one go is extremely mentally exhausting i know the feeling. I grew up as a stablehand for my family, they threw the majority of the responsibility on me, therefore i was blamed when there was a death. Seeing several animals suddenly die without a warning is horrible, especially when you’re completely helpless. Its not your fault, you’ve done so many great things for your animals and you’ve always wanted the best for them, just like us even with all the optimal care in the world eventually we pass on, take care of your mental health ❤

[@stinnje]

I'm so sorry, Jessica. I had my first reptile loss last year. It was unexpected and really shook me up. I can only imagine how much worse it is to go through it over and over again. I just want you to know that you and your current pets have my continued support here on Patreon whether you're making content or not. Please take all the time you need, and be kind to yourself. You are a great mom to all your four-legged kiddos, life is just an unpredictable dumpster fire sometimes. Sending lots of love! Here's hoping that things start looking up.

[@astropuff5265]

TL;DR I’m so sorry for your loss. Please be kind to yourself. You always do your best for them. I’m so sorry for your loss. Nova was so feisty and beautiful and full of personality. I remember the first video when you brought her home. You didn’t get enough time together. I love her so much and she will be missed by so many. You certainly don’t need anyone’s approval, but I understand why you wanted to bury her. A necropsy likely would’ve brought up more questions than answers anyway. I understand the anxiety. When my first pet died I started checking on the rest of them too much. To the point where I was probably annoying them. And I also made a lot of vet appointments just to find out nothing was wrong. Terrified that I’d let something fly under the radar. There’s a lot of self-doubt. I don’t know what they’re thinking and feeling. I don’t trust myself to always know when something is wrong. I’m afraid of all the possibilities, the thought of losing them, and the regret that comes after. Always wondering if there’s something else I could’ve done. I know a little of that anxiety, on a much smaller scale. And I wouldn’t wish it on anybody. And the fact that your favourite thing is also the thing causing the anxiety makes it that much worse. I think it was a healthy choice to realize that you have to slow down with new reptiles for a bit. I know you want to be able to take everyone, but you’re one person vs. 70 and you have to take care of yourself to be able to give them the best care. There are few people in the world who could take responsibility for that many lives single-handedly. You’re amazing. I hope that over time you will be able to associate your reptiles with joy more than anxiety. In the community tab you said “I clearly did something wrong” your brain is lying to you there. You provided exceptional care based on the best knowledge people have today. She had more space, more food variety, more enrichment, more attention than most bearded dragons get. This illness could be genetic. There’s no evidence to show that her death has anything to do with your care. Love and take care of yourself Jessica!

[@kirkfranklinboy1986]

I just started following you. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. ❤😢

[@onewen]

i'm so sorry for your loss ❤‍🩹😔🙏🏼 but i'm ALSO so so sorry that you feel you. have to "check with us" as if we need to have any say in how you handle YOUR animals. It feels like this added pressure on you to make sure WE are ok with your choices. It's obvious you love your animals and provide them the ultimate best care... please don't feel this burden from US (people who don't live with you, or know your animals) to add to the tremendous pressure you're already under. I hope that makes sense. I guess I just wanted to make sure you knew that you're supported and respected ... i know each loss hurts more than you can say 🙏🏼❤‍🩹

[@crazycritterlady88]

You are an amazing and incredibly caring woman! There is absolutely no reason to apologize. Please take the time to take care of yourself and your critters. Burn out is incredibly hard on the mind, body, and soul. Take as much time as you need to heal. 💜

[@lisamccullough5150]

We love and support you girlie. So sorry for the losses. Take time to heal. ❤

[@I7of14]

My deepest sympathy for your loss.... I feel for you as my best friend is not doing very good... 😥 We are fighting the good fight... Always hoping for a miracle 🙏... Be strong...

[@tecsiederp]

As someone with pretty horrible anxiety as well I can totally understand the fear of more bad things happening. Glad you're taking some time to take care of yourself too. ❤

[@BarbuDragonz]

Oh my gosh Jessica 🥺, now im crying losing a beardie is so fucking hard. I’m so sorry for your loss and I love you ❤

[@mellewedin8221]

I am so sorry about your losses lately. It is beyond devastating. I can relate with toads, just mine where frogs. I own African Dwarf Frogs. Now I have covers on my tanks. They had openings for filters and air line and food Port. Well some managed to find the small openings and jumped the tank. At best a ADF has about 20 minutes before it needs water or it will pass. I have saved one! Thankfully it did suffer any long lasting effects. I know what it's like to find a loved pet that has passed. I worry so much with my turtle and my 2 Pac-Man frogs. The turtle I never really intended on keeping her. But she grew on me, so I did as much research as one came do and have her set up right now. But I still worry about her laying eggs and stuff like that.

[@AllieEaley]

I am soo sorry for your losses!!

[@kymberlysteiger8125]

I’m really sorry. I’m glad you are taking time for yourself. From someone who has Severe Anxiety and several Chronic Illnesses, I can’t stress enough how important it is to step away and focus on you. Stress can cause our body’s serious damage, especially over a long period. I’ll still be here and on Patreon until you get back. I’m sending you all my love and positive energy 💙💙💙💙 Kymberly

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

Yes I am worried that my issues have been made worse by stress so I definitely need to manage that thank you ❤️

[@JJ_The_Gamer689]

@@JessicasAnimalFriendsthis was the best comment section of any sad video I have ever seen, you have a really good community and we all care for you

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

@@JJ_The_Gamer689 I know I am SO grateful ❤️

[@Sherributtrfly]

I’m so sorry sweetie! I know it hurts. Always remember that the hurt that we feel is evidence of the strong love we felt. Besides, as I’ve gotten older I have come to believe in the rainbow bridge. I would wager that you, too, have gazed into the eyes of some of your pets and seen that there is someone in there. I knew about people after my son died. I know these little guys are on the other side of that bridge! (Hugs!)

[@burdo3575]

reptiles hide health problems very well, as in the wild they cannot show weakness to their predators. Sudden death can be common. Remember the good times and keep bringing love and joy to new reptiles. much love

[@melissakennedy5897]

I’m so sorry

[@kenzylane8916]

I understand how you feel I once had to move temporarily into a camper. At the time I had a bearded dragon and 3 leopard geckos. And one day while I was at work, the breaker tripped and turned the a/c off and being a 97°F day by the time I got home it was 118° in the camper and I lost all my boys and almost my kitten who was also home.

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

Goodness I’m so sorry

[@EclecticallyEccentric]

While I don't think this was your fault, I definitely understand the toll it takes on your mental health. Take all the time you need to grieve and heal before you decide to take in anyone else. Whether you continue making content or not, I wish you and your scaly, slimy, or furry, loved ones the best.

[@JordanAscencio-p5y]

I just lost my beardie yoda he was like my best friend I had a cave setup made of bricks and I didn’t realize that maybe it was too close to the edge or something but I found him with a brick on top of him and it seems like he suffocated and I’ve been devastated by it I had to look up a video so I didn’t feel alone I miss my beardie so much I feel so much guilt because if I just checked at the right time I could’ve saved him ugh thanks for helping me feel that I’m not alone ❤

[@eriathwen1320]

I'm so sorry for your losses, this is exactly how I'm cuttently feeling. I'm also taking a haitus on taking in special needs animals. I lost 6 animals last year, 1 was my fault in an accident. This year in 24 hours 2 more, both to cancer. I now also have my African fat tailed gecko due surgery next week for follicular stasis.. you can't pour from an empty cup. You HAVE to prioritise self care in this line of work or burnout and compassion fatigue, anxiety and panic, will come and sit you on your ass. Everything crossed the losses are over so you can focus on getting to a place the day to day routine becomes enjoyable again, not painful. You got this ❤ take as long as it takes, you can't rush it.

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

Gosh I’m so sorry. Good luck with your gecko’s prosecute ❤️

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

Procedure LOL

[@Yoshoggutha]

I deeply admire and respect you both for taking these animals in, I could never do it and survive.

[@HendarsChannel]

A new watcher here but I like your videos. Very sorry for your loss. I can say from experience I recognize that in fight or flight after a death. Lost our grandma 2017, our dog 2019, little brother 2021 and the last dog 2022. It's happened several times before but I know how stressful that is when you just wait for it to happen. Expecting it, and I know pets can sometimes be closer to us than anyone thinks they would be. I was especially disdraught at my little girl 2019, she basically slept ontop of me for 10 years, she refused to sleep anywhere else. I couldn't function for weeks and had to take time off from work. So you take your time you need to heal, take time off, after I lost the last dog I felt similar, I love animals but I just can't it hurts too much. That was the last pet for a long time so spend some time on yourself to heal.

[@desmowizard]

Rescuing unwanted animals is a really hard job, I can imagine. Death is just part of life in all living things. Try to look at it from a different perspective. Imagine what would have happened to the animal had you not taken him/her in. At least you gave them a peacful life with dignity and some happiness. You are a good person, try not to feel guilty about deaths under your care, its a normal thing.

[@reptiletailz108]

Oh sweet girl I'm so so so so so sorry my heart still aches anytime I think about my baby girl I lost it still kills me

[@SorrySoulWolf]

Sending you all the love

[@erinkalb1693]

I had the same thing happen with one of my tree frogs. It was so tiny and I was cleaning out the tank and she hopped out and I couldn't find her. Me and my boyfriend searched for days and I cried for so long cause I felt so bad. I'm so sorry for your losses. I know my animals no matter how big or small I feel like it's my child.

[@janlvll5486]

I'm so sorry, you have my deepest sympathies! Don't blame yourself death is part of life and I know it hurts. I'll pray for you!

[@taylorsoha300]

Thank you for being so real and raw about what’s going on. Your passion for these animals is obvious, and your reptiles/mental health is always more important. I’ve become such a big fan of yours because of your honesty, and I’m sorry you’re having a hard time right now. I hope everything works out, herp-tube will always be here for your sunnier days.

[@emmal5445]

I'm so sorry that this has happened. You are such a great person and care for your animals so dearly. We all love you and I'm praying for you.

[@oretho6406]

You've done everything you could, I'm sure we've all been through this situation, doesn't even matter what animal... The mere fact that you cared made all the difference... Never forget that fact...

[@cara9648]

I'm sorry for the losses. Taking care of yourself is equally important as taking care of your animals. So please don't feel bad about doing so and focus on your own health too.

[@sreace723]

Never apologize for being human. If you need to fill your heart and mind up after suffering such devastating losses; you've got to take that time to heal and process those feelings. You give so much of yourself to the animals you keep. Plus taking the time to produce content. You need to find something else that brings you joy. Something that's JUST for you. Something that invigorates your mood and fills you with the energy you need to care for those animals that need special attention. I am truly sorry about your losses. Nova had a fantastic life just being cared for by you.

[@laurengardella9524]

I'm so sorry for your loss. All of your feelings are extremely valid and understandable. Went through a similar thing with my cat Yoruichi. He was only barely 4 years old and showed no signs of being sick or anything til the night he died. I totally understand the anxiety. The cats I still have are genetically related to Yoruichi who suddenly passed and I still am trying to control my anxiety over their health and my own. I wouldn't wish this feeling on my enemy. Sending all the love and hugs. 😭💚💚💚💚💕💕💕🫂🫂🫂

[@laurendobinson5930]

I firstly want to say am truly sorry for your loss of your beautiful girl as a beaded dragon owner myself I understand the pain.😢. And 2nd I want you to know accidents happen sometimes you give all of your animals an amazing life and you should be proud of the care you give them, completely understand l how your feeling. Take your time and we will be here for always. Whenever your ready. Xxx 💓

[@enhunter82]

❤ sending love. Take care of yourself!

[@kiscrazyreptiles]

Please take your time and take care of yourself. Losing pets so suddenly is extremely painful but I hope you know that it's ok and that mistakes happen and that you do such amazing care especially compared to most people. You are a huge reason my first leopard gecko lives in a huge terrarium with a great set-up. You got this, we are here for you, and please don't feel pressured to post until you are ready.💛

[@aliciaflinchum6511]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I totally understand how unexpected loss of a loved one under your care could be an infinite source of anxiety and stress as well as grief and sorrow. Though I will miss your content, I am glad you're going to take time for yourself to heal and figure out the next steps you want to take. You've done so much for the reptile community. Take care of yourself.

[@A-530cr]

How did your bearded dragon die?

[@CaJoJeMom]

I’m so sorry. Sometimes there’s just nothing we can do. ❤ take care and grieve in whatever way is best for you

[@satansoup]

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending love and light. 🥺

[@Barryhatchet]

I just got a bearded dragon and I can see how you can be emotionally attached to a lizard. They are just so easy to bond with. I am sorry for your loss. PS, I got 7 leopard geckos I think because you inspired me. They are so interesting and unique personalities

[@pereztube2]

It's totally fair and understandable for you to feel this way. Hope things get better and sorry for your loss.

[@Yoshoggutha]

Oh, Jess 😞.......I wish I had the words....I'm so utterly, truly devastated for both you and your sweet Nova. I've lost many, too, so I won't rant much. You're a wonderful keeper and a phenomenal human being, and I know you always do everything within your power to help your animals. Please don't blame yourself too much, and don't hold your grief in either. I'm SO SO SO SO SO sorry, my dear! Please take care of yourself! Sending love and hugs and all the healing vibes from me and my girlfriend. 🥺😢💔❤️‍🔥 R.I.P Nova, you were deeply loved.

[@melissasyard1212]

I am so sorry for your loss, these things happen and It is not your fault. She was a wonderful lil beardie, thank you for sharing her. Sometimes you need to take a step back and care for yourself first. I hope you find your peace, be well girl and don't forget you are strong!

[@abalt3019]

Hang in there and no need for apologies. You’re doing great work, and unfortunately death comes when we least want it to. Still trying to find my heart after losing our first leo on Thanksgiving for no apparent reason that we could know. So hard. Take care of yourself.

[@ReptilesRmylife70247]

Sometimes we do need time for ourselves when this type of things happen and we just lost our dog on December 16th and I’m still grieving over her I’m not crying as much.

[@hannahs4624]

I know a few people's female bearded dragons that passed away from being egg bound. And I recently inherited a female bearded dragon from a family member because I'm "the reptile girl" of the family, but I've never had a bearded dragon before and I am constantly worried she has eggs she needs to lay 😬 Sometimes keeping animals is really tough emotionally.

[@Rsheissekopf]

I can relate to how you feel, I just had to put my frog to sleep last month and I'd had her for nearly 8 years, since she was a tiny froglet when I got her in middle school. You think it won't hit you that hard when it's such a small animal, but it's such a change, not seeing them in the morning to feed them or not cleaning their tank every week and then you just find yourself on the floor crying. I genuinely am sorry you had to go through that, especially so unexpectedly. I can say without a doubt that your dragon (and your frog) were lucky enough to have a wonderful life. When you're feeling at your worst take solace in the fact that they were undoubtedly very happy during their lives with you and felt safe with you as their caretaker. Though it probably won't be possible until more time has gone by, remember the ending is only the tiniest sliver of the whole story, and they spent basically every part of their existence happy and healthy. I don't know if it will help, but I like to think about how everything that dies is never completely gone as the atoms and matter that made them cannot be destroyed and are only spread about to be cycled into new life-- everything is part of that cycle, and the matter that makes up those we love and lost was once part of other life and other lives. Death is a removal, but it is also a return. It takes us away from those that love us, but it allows us to give that energy of life back to where we borrowed if from, where it will be used by other beings or other things to create new structures and new life.

[@JessicasAnimalFriends]

I’m sorry for your loss :(

[@azurastarfire]

It's not your fault!! wishing you peace while you go through the grieving process❤️❤️

[@g3n3tixnerd32]

You are a beautiful human. You are loved and supported. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your experiences and pain. Sending positive and healing energy.

[@rvlpaintings4679]

Oh Jess, I am so, so sorry to hear this. Bless your heart! I don't even know what to say but my thoughts are with you. Yes definitely take some time for you! Don't apologise, you've done amazingly!! I've watched you since very near the beginning and you've always put your reptiles first, and looked after them so, so much! You take this time to spend time with those wonderful reptiles you have and have some time for you ❤️❤️❤️ We look forward to seeing you when/if you're ready to come back🥰❤️ ~ Rachel x

[@kathrineromero5024]

I'm so sorry you have gone through this. But definitely do what is best for you. I appreciate so much ppl like you that give so much of yourself to save love and care for animals.

[@andrewlay88]

I'm so sorry hun, 😞

[@stina9659]

Thank you for sharing and im sorry for your loss

[@coffeepot3123]

My friends dog died last year from some incurable bowl thing, and he told me this at his house after i saw just the picture on his shelf. And in some way i managed to lighten the mood by talking about people that lose their goldfish, and like seeing their goldfish swim weird cause of their air bladder.. something something.. stopped working, and this made him crack a wide smile, and then i was like: "well yeah but it's nothing like a dog but.." Him with the widest smile: "Well i mean .. .i *reckon* they felt sad for losing their goldfish i mean haha". - Grown men, 28 years old.

[@ReptilesRmylife70247]

I’m so sorry that your bearded dragon past I cry too when I lose one of my desert iguanas die and they come from our back yard because we rescue them so it’s very heart breaking when we all lose our reptillys

[@Bekz715]

So sorry for your losses. Much love to you. ❤❤❤

[@juliamyers1061]

I'm so sorry 😞, I also have Uro as well, I wish you peace of mind

[@Aaron_786]

omg im so sorry. sending you so much love

[@christopherlocke7076]

My Girl Jen just passed away overnight. I woke in the morning to feed them and she was laying on the log lifeless. She was 11 years old. I took her outside to get some sun and run around the back yard on the grass the day before. She ate some Dubias and some collard greens and after she was just chilled out for the rest of the day. I had three Dragons. Now I have only 2. REST IN PEACE JENNY GIRL.

[@andersschmich8600]

That really sucks…I recently had my three bumblebee dart frogs suddenly all pass away in the span of two weeks, still have no idea what happened. I agree, it makes you feel reluctant to get any more animals after something like that.

[@Greengraphyexotics]

I’m so sorry for your loss 😢 death/disappearance is never funny to experience. I just think you are so strong as a person to take on these animals that other people might reject cuz of their conditions. You give them a second chance in life and that’s a huge thing to offer! I myself is trying to take in reptiles that people get tired of or don’t have the time for anymore but I don’t have the economics or the psychological strength to take in sick/injured animals yet 🥺 Malnourished is one thing but diseases 😭 I will just break inside to see an animal not being normal 🥺🥺 I adore you girl! ❤

[@nomads1999]

Im crying rn, I love reptiles with all my heart Rip to the little buddies!

[@carolinalama8411]

I'm so sorry for your losses, no matter when they happened, if they are expected or not, each loss takes something from us. Yes, sweet heart, you are doing the right thing taking time for yourself, to protect yourself. We all love watching your videos and pets, and learn constantly from you. You've been my inspiration to help my daughter be a good leopard gecko keeper. Don't blame yourself for anything. I think you are great at what you do, sharing practically your life we us strangers. Know many of your followers are wanting to hug you and give our love. Take your time. I know we all will be happy to see you again.

[@MichaelaEDavis]

I take care of all our housed Animals (I don't says caged because WHY). A Bunny, a Fish Tank, my 2 Leopards and Frog. Just with that I feel a little overwhelmed some days. I'm even starting to think of rehoming my Fish after my oldest one passes because I can't keep up with their tank as much as I used to...and they're rescues. So for you to take on 70 + Animals on your own is stressful as all hell but also crazy amazing. And you do a great job with all of them. Nova loves you, and she thanks you for all you've done for her. She and Mako made it home to Franklin and the others knowing they are still loved.

[@rachelhintzen7687]

I send all the hugs in the world and all the love - i can relate to you so much, my beardie was dead in her tank this morning and she wasn't even fully grown up yet and i just feel horrible and so so guilty - anyway, thank you so much for sharing this, you help other keepers with their pain, if that helps anything - thank you and all strength to you also for the future

[@brittanyweber3929]

I’m so sorry girl

[@Hardhatreptiles95]

Sometimes we don't know why things happen they just do. She's in heaven.

[@amethyst-kp5yh]

I'm sorry that happened, :( I hope you feel better soon, i would feel the same way if my tiny dino died

[@hwb2395]

I had a pet bunny named Coco that I've had for 2 1/2 years, and she went missing from our backyard one night. She loved being outside more than anything, so she has this little doggy door so that whenever she wants she can come back in. Normally my mom just makes she she comes inside before she goes to bed, but it was super late and she didn't feel like going outside, so we just expected Coco to come in on her own (we've done it before). That was the night she didn't come in. This happened almost 4 months ago and for some reason I still have hope I'll some how just see her on the sidewalk minding her own busyness, but I don't think that is going to happen. I'm crying as I'm writing this, and I just don't know what to do anymore.

[@stevenbaker43]

I know its a sad moment for you, but just remember everyone makes mistakes. Hope you have a nice Jessica god bless you.😇

[@teenahall6502]

So sorry for your loss.

[@DriaTarian]

I have been in a similar situation. Where the thing that used to be my first priority and bring me joy ended up being my largest source of anxiety and pain in the end. Honestly, the only way I could handle it was to distance myself as well. On top of that realization you've also lost those little souls that you care so much about. Don't ever feel bad about taking time to heal. You have done so much for your charges. You've advocated and educated to try and prevent so much current and future suffering in the lives of these creatures. Give yourself some of that mercy. You've been ill and dealing with so much. Go get a hug from someone you love and eat some comfort food. I'm not a doctor but I know something about being chronically ill. Six months of illness qualifies you, ya know. You have to pace yourself or you'll burn yourself down. Even when that little voice in your head tells you that you should be doing everything and then some when you feel awful, don't. Do what you need to do, the things you HAVE to, and that's it. Go get some rest. Doing extra is for the people who have extra to share. Let yourself rest for a while. We'll be here 💜