My Boyfriend Suddenly Changed And Wants Traditional Gender Roles When Married r/Relationships

[@Deedoof]

If you're willing to force sex on your sick/injured partner, there's nothing stopping you from assaulting a drunk stranger. This is sick behavior being taught.

[@CyeOutsider]

There's a sense of entitlement that comes in a relationship that isn't there with strangers. Historically, rape in marriage was legal. It was based on the idea that men had a right to sex and that a marriage certificate was essentially consent. Those laws were changed eventually but I guess the incel and alpha male movements are reviving that mentality.

[@damien678]

​@@CyeOutsider It's so demented that some men think this was. Why would you want to rape your partner? JFC

[@CyeOutsider]

​​@@damien678They didn't think of it as rape. It was about claiming their marital rights. And this is why feminism is necessary. It's almost like some men don't see women as fully human - as complex, substantial, individuals with thought and feelings and a right to bodily autonomy. There was - and still is in some places - as sense of ownership or entitlement by men with regard to female bodies. This is central to incel culture. They feel entitled to sex from women and when they don't get it, they seek denigrate and humiliate women in anger. Its ugly stuff.

[@gemh89]

Guys are still often like this, you talk about rap3 and they imagine a guy in the mask in the dark, not the bf ignoring the "no's"

[@draconicfeline6177]

It's rarely a stranger, unfortunately. Usually, it's someone close, family or a friend.@@gemh89

[@autumn557]

Oh yes, the “I want you to still work but also cook, clean and don’t ever question your master” request. Worked out well for that one. I’m almost insulted by how stupid men think woman are sometimes.

[@Snowshowslow]

Why almost?

[@SakuraMoonflower]

They're convinced, but that's because most of them are so dumb. 😂🎉

[@colleens1107]

Yes my love you make more money than me and work as many hours (possibly more actually) but YOU will do all the hard work of raising our children, which I shall pick how many we will have, and all the housework. What am I gonna do? Watch the game like A MAN. Barf and seriously women en masse need to have standards so men will stop believing they can demand this bullshit

[@Enriquez2222]

@@Snowshowslow because a lot of them come off too stupid for you to take offence. I feel more sympathy that he’s really that delusional and how horrible his life will be if he don’t wake up 😂. It hilarious kinda cause damn, I want whatever he’s having lol

[@robertx8020]

@@Enriquez2222 The sad thing is that he might even find a woman that will do what he wants ..because women like that are out there

[@OnewBiased]

Lmao dude wants traditional roles' benefit but not the responsibilities 😂😂😂 He wants his wife to be the breadwinner but she can't have any say in the relationship... How delusional is he to not realize that it's easier to drop him than to cater to his whims?

[@ACAB.forcutie]

They're told they are the prize 😂

[@lynnw7155]

Some alpha male. The first time she stands up for herself, he crumbles. He's got some messed up ideas and doesn't seem very sure about them. He needs to get his head on straight before he's ready for a relationship.

[@jgw5491]

@@lynnw7155 Are there any more single female Duggars, 16 or older available?

[@sonialinsey8083]

Idk lotta entitlement in gen z. Kinda like the girls who want to sleep around and don’t need no man but he’s gotta pay for the date and treat her like a princess. Nah girl in my day we split the bill until we legally share finances.

[@NightcoreNewbie]

I'm not trying to sound rude, but isn't traditional roles means he's supposed to be the breadwinner and she stays at home and does all the chores? This man got his entire thought process all warped.

[@godking]

The boyfriend demanding sex is 100 % a "technique" he heard on one of those podcasts which was sure to work according to the podcaster.

[@epicXtrollface]

@@thecursed01 Absolutely. What he did was sexual coercion.

[@Iflie]

Yeah because they tell them that women play games and if he's dominant she'll want him more. There is a reason only manboys love them, women know what they want.

[@hodgeelmwood8677]

Yeah, gotta love the "why are you putting your needs above mine" remark. First, sex isn't a need so much as it's a want. Second, why is he putting HIS needs above HERS?

[@Sassy_Kat]

@@epicXtrollfaceexactly. I also think he would have tried to baby trap OP, even though she has maintained from the beginning that she doesn’t want kids. Idk, just got that vibe from his reaction and recent complete change of heart on everything.

[@Allantitan]

⁠@@Sassy_Katoh definitely he wanted another way to keep her under his thumb. Even as a guy that behavior makes me nauseous

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

You know, I’ve never seen a post about someone whose partner started watching “alpha male podcasts” and it strengthened the relationship.

[@jamieholland3853]

Because no one posts on reddit that their relationship is going well

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

@@jamieholland3853there’s been multiple wholesome posts on this channel. And sometimes there’s conflict, someone posts it to reddit, and then they resolve it.

[@themegabigctoo]

Yep I'd be saying "later tater tot"

[@crem-crem4070]

@@jamieholland3853there are a ton of subreddit dedicated to happy stories, what are you in about?

[@SherriLyle80s]

Pretty much

[@errantwinds-up8uu]

"...alpha male podcasts" "oh no" Me too, Mark, me too :(

[@ElviAlivE]

New fear unlocked: Marrying a brother/ sister you didn't know was your brother/sister

[@audraverela3663]

Ew and they’re continuing to screw each other knowing that?! “We didn’t grow up together” YOU CAME OUT OF THE SAME VAGINA THO! This isn’t anime or manga, and I hope they don’t have anymore kids bc they could be arrested for literal fucking incest, and the proof is their kids. Like if I knew my partner was my half sib I’d be sick and immediately break it off. It’s vile.

[@tideio]

True but also my parents are super religious and got married young and are still together, I also have 5 full siblings so I’m pretty sure there’s no one out there hopefully 😭

[@Nico6th]

Thanks to the whole sperm/egg donor thing that has become a way bigger problem in recent years. There were news stories about men who donated way more often than they should legally have (because the clinics didn't check with each other) and ended up siring dozens if not even more children. Who all live within a certain radius of each other and are often of similar age or at least within a certain age range. I remember a Netflix documentary about a group of children who were all "created" by one doctor who used his own you-know-what instead of the donated stuff. They are now close to 100 half-siblings and still discovering more. Basically, they can't date anyone without genetic testing because the risk is just too high for them. Thanks to 23andme and other websites like that a few dozen (!) fertility doctors in the USA alone have been found to have used their own stuff without the patients knowing. Genetical testing can be wrong for so many reasons, but maybe a relationship test pre-marriage wouldn't be too bad of an idea nowadays.

[@ElviAlivE]

@tideio my parents have been together forever, but dad still fancies himself a single man when there's a pretty woman around

[@raizensamson6723]

​@@ElviAlivEThat's pretty fucked up! My parents have been together for a long ass time and neither of them act that way when they're alone. Theyre still very much in love with one another and I genuinely don't think they'd ever marry again, let alone date, if one of them died.

[@SCP01986]

So he wanted 'traditional gender roles' where OP slaved away at home doing the cooking and the cleaning but wasn't willing to be the traditional husband where he made all the money and she didn't have to work, except in this relationship she also has to work and will do 100% of all the chores. These modern age misogynists are too much!

[@RisetoStrength]

That's what a lot of people don't get. A traditional marriage takes preparation on both sides, for the majority of your lives.

[@tully6648]

It's definitely spreading. There was a story a bit ago where OP's husband wanted her to be an immaculate old-timey housewife, but was also upset that she wasn't as ambitious in her career as he was with his (she made a great salary from a WFH position, IIRC). OP realized it was bunk, but did a little test. She got all dolled up and served him this great meal, made from scratch, washed up and everything after. He didn't say anything until she asked him about it, and he said "It's a start." Then I think later on he told her that what she'd done was 'basic adulting,' and she didn't need to be complimented for doing the basics. I've seen a couple others like this, and it's honestly really worrying. It's one of those things where every time I hear it, I think 'Bro, do you even HEAR YOURSELF? Say that out loud and listen carefully to what you're saying.'

[@RisetoStrength]

@@tully6648 Gotta pick between having a housewife or a wife with an income.

[@heatheraucoin5832]

@@tully6648 yeah and all the while he was cheating on her and got his AP pregnant. And OP said good luck with being a dad bc they agreed to be child free. Well guess what, having a baby cry in the middle of the night, puking, diaper change, staying up til they sleep, taking care while being sick, being too tired for sex and workout, not being to leave the house when YOU want to, struggle to trust and find a sitter, and money is going to be extra bc kids are expensive, and attention will go to the child. And let’s hope the child doesn’t have special needs, that’s extra time, money, attention, and TLC. And some marriages/ relationships don’t succeed or last bc of stress from parents. So like the I at least hope he makes it work for this relationship

[@cesaravegah3787]

Yup, last wave mysoginists as well as feminists on the other extreme are insane people, maybe there is something on the water.

[@RockinTheBassGuitar]

Story 1: I and my husband have a traditional marriage. I stay home with the kids and he supports us. What the OP's boyfriend is describing isn't that, it's controlling. My husband actively seeks my opinions especially when we disagree, he sees his role as making sure me and the kids are taken care of financially and I see mine as taking care of immediate physical needs like making meals and making sure everyone has clothing. The BF just wants to control someone.

[@Galworld761]

You don’t work. Key difference.

[@vSpade]

As someone that is also in a traditional marriage as the provider, I appreciate your comment. Traditional roles does not mean one partner is completely silenced to monopolize decisions and avoid discussion. No matter what type of dynamic two partners share, the default is to ensure both sides are heard. Her boyfriend definitely had the wrong intentions.

[@sonialinsey8083]

Right? I said above, my husband and marriage are pretty conservative. I knew what I was getting into. Thing is, my husband is kind to me and if I wanted to do something else he would be open to it. Forcing your wife to have s3x was never ok. Being a bully is a big tell that you ain’t alpha, son 🤪

[@SuperCleopatrajones]

I was a traditional wife for 15 years. Never did my husband try this crap with me. I did give him more decision-making over the finances since he is excellent with finances, but he never used that to dominate the relationship ❤

[@Allantitan]

@@sonialinsey8083and that’s how any relationship should be. It should have at minimum a little give and take from both sides

[@KE-hr4sb]

S1: I'm actually shocked at how many men in Reddit posts want a "traditional/50's housewife," but also expect her to work full-time, oftentimes her being the breadwinner. Nah, mate. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

[@damien678]

They literally just want a mommy that'll take care of them, fuck them, AND not tell them what to do 🤢

[@childfreechick2980]

Story 1: his plan was to trap her in marriage and switch up. He got comfortable and did it too soon. This is why the “choose better” mentality is mostly bullshit. These guys will pretend to be someone else for years, until they feel they have you where they want you. This is why an exit plan is essential.

[@rachelryan84]

Oh it gets worse, the ones telling you should have chosen better, are the same ones telling you to do everything possible to sabotage your ability to do so.

[@wickiwo1098]

Yup, some people will wait until they think they've "set the hook", then spring their true intentions on unsuspecting partners. At least, she found out BEFORE the wedding and didn't buy his promises to "improve". Glad she ran.

[@mucanan]

I actually think this is a good example of “choose better”, since she decided to break up with the guy before getting married or having a kid with him.

[@Nevertoleave]

Who wants to bet he realized she was having doubts and about to get away so he was trying to have sex with her to sabotage their birth control and attempt to get her pregnant to force her to stay. He’d go from no kids to I said we’re having another I don’t care if the doctor said it could kill you. Then replacing her with some other barely legal or just out of college girl and doing the same to her

[@videofan1010]

​​@@mucanan No it isn't because she wasted 3 years based on his lie. She thought he was someone else because he presented himself differently. How can you make choices in a sea full of liars?

[@hi_stranger9156]

I'm guessing that he was following the "alpha male" advice, but they never said 'oh by the way she might break up with you, dude' and so when she didn't follow the script he expected he was suddenly trying to wing it when he thought he knew exactly what to do. He was told that she'd just go along with it because he's the "alpha male", after all, and so his woman will obviously obey him and submit to him. The podcasts and videos and whatever never show the "alpha male" being shut down, broken up with, or otherwise not getting his way, so men trying to do what the "alphas" tell them to are blindsided when it turns out the "alphas" actually don't have a clue how a healthy relationship works.

[@101Mant]

That's because it is all BS, the people peddling it just see the wannabe "alphas" as an easy mark they can make money from. If the advice actually worked (ignore that the whole alpha and beta concept is BS) they wouldn't keep coming back for more advice.

[@hi_stranger9156]

@@101Mant you know this story remind me about OP who breaking up with her bf because the bf keep calling her stink.

[@Deedoof]

There's a reason "alpha males" seek out young women who barely graduated high school. It's easier to manipulate someone when you have more money and resources to hold over their head. OP's idiot ex forgot she's already independent and not a doormat. FAFO.

[@Fenrislokisonsuncut]

@@101Mantit’s is and isn’t I used to watch those videos ALOT and can say while they are toxic there are points that are valid mainly the ones revolving around self confidence and knowing when to nope out of a relationship that doesn’t fit your views however the route of women are bad is why I ended up stopping watching them. While I agree most relationships I’ve been in heard of and seen have been broken up or messed up because of the woman it’s also because the guy was just spineless which is what red pill “try’s” to fix “grow a spine be a man” motto but they go about it in the most toxic ways and spew the notion of stay single which I disagree with

[@tully6648]

@@hi_stranger9156 I remember that one. If I remember right, the reveal is that he picked it up from his father, who did it to his mother.

[@jessikajane4967]

Story 1 - Dude has always been insecure about making less and turned to "alpha male podcasts" to boost his confidence. Then his passivity turned to red pill cheerleader.

[@Emi_TheWinged]

Yeah " i feel insecure becasue im making less than my gf" what do i do? podcasts: " you are a male so you automatically have more value than she in all aspects of life, and to be alfa you need to take it with force because you are superior and she is your property" and here we have the resoult. Rather than working on his insecurities and communicating with his partner. He can just use the easy way and abuse her and work to bring her down.... That's all what it is in those podcasts. They are just a bunch of loosers that teach how to abuse and manipulate women. No self reflection or logic. And ofc s easier to blame women than to work on themselves

[@anthoniquebethley9711]

This is unfortunately becoming all too common. So much a News article explains this phenomenon. The " Buzz Feed News " Story is called " How Male Influencers Turned The Men In These People's Lives Toxic ". Also OP in Story NO. 1 said he wasn't like this for the first 3 years. What does that mean , did he give only vague answers , and not directly answer her ? Or did he tell her one thing and then another thing? This is called pulling a 180 * , 360 * , or the Bait & Switch , isn't it ?

[@CyeOutsider]

​@@anthoniquebethley9711Its the old cliche of people changing as soon as the rings on.

[@chinaking918]

@@anthoniquebethley9711this is definitely sounding like a bait and switch going on.

[@ablankenship83]

Ugh. I don’t have anything against traditional dynamics , but guys like this fail to understand THEY CANT ACT LIKE A MODERN MAN and expect to reap the “benefits” of being a traditional man. These kinds of men miss the requirement of “paying the costs to be the boss” to make that dynamic work. I would have told him to work on be a traditional man before expecting me to be a traditional woman 😂

[@JudeDragon158]

Literally; like my bf has offered to have me be a stay at home bc he knows I hate working + his family background- but he can do that bc he’s a nurse and can actually do it… (also the whole not taking ops opinions… like what?)

[@damien678]

These kinds of guys want mommies they can also fuck, that also can't tell them what to do To put it mildly, it's disgusting

[@theirishsaint4324]

It’s actually confusing because if you go to the more moderate line of thinking of the actual traditional marriage (not what people have decided it is), his comments make no sense. If a wife works, it is a more split household chore relationship, full stop. I’m someone who is in an actual traditional marriage and I know full well that it’s unrealistic to ask a person who works a full day to be solely responsible for the entirety of the homefront, I have seen both men and women expect this out of their partners. That would be a no… and as far as traditional marriage in the actual sense. He’s wrong too. He has to trust her to make wise financial decisions for the household (Id still say bigger purchases should be made together regardless of type of marriage) just as she has to trust him to bring in the income. Traditional marriage is partnership. You work together towards common goals… my husband still helps around the house sometimes, and Cooks dinner on occasion. I homeschool our kids (which means I don’t get 8 hrs of no kids) and am pregnant, my husband is an active father and husband. He values my input, and doesn’t abuse his position. He seldom says “we are doing this” or “we are not doing this”. Neither do I abuse mine by crazy spending sprees, and or yanking his schedule around on him with zero dialogue. I also have veto power to a degree as well. And do not abuse that. We’d rather discuss something to make sure we agree and find a solution on how to approach it than have a weird power dynamic. I don’t understand this concept of traditional marriage being “submit woman” “you should speak when your spoken to.” “No you can’t get your nails done!” I’m not saying there aren’t marriages like this, but I wouldn’t put it under the category of traditional but slightly abusive…

[@atqmra13]

You killed me with the “other dating options”. After going through all this, humor is what keeps you going.

[@frequentuser360]

Story 2: I know this is an intense topic, but both the husband and wife sound hilarious and I'll bet they're a blast to hang out with. The additional dating options comment made me literally laugh out loud.

[@errantwinds-up8uu]

Yeah they sound like awesome people!

[@rebeccaperkins2605]

that line was so amazing! lmao

[@stan8479]

They're taking their situation head-on and have some humor about it. It is difficult to be able to make something lighthearted out of something so intense. Good for them, honestly.

[@charlottehancock76]

That additional dating options made me choke 😂

[@lynnw7155]

I'd bet there's a lot more of that (unknown half-siblings floating around) than anyone imagines. I found out (though Ancestry DNA when I was in my 60s) that I have an older half-brother in the very small town where I was born (oh Dad! You rascal!). Fortunately don't think I ever even met him, let alone married him.

[@lordfreerealestate8302]

A lot of abusive people only show their true colors after commitment/entrapment (marriage, baby, move-in, etc). Very common. So he likely hid his true intentions and flipped like abusers do.

[@Wtfamidoing2970]

As if the whole post wasn’t absolutely horrifying the fact that he not only got angry, and tried to pressure her into sex, he then had the gall to say that she was putting her needs over his and she can just force herself?! Dude was putting his needs over her the ENTIRE time, then proceeds to say something that disgusting just to have sex??? I know the bar is low for some people, but damn some days it’s low enough to trip over.

[@thecraftygoddess1025]

The bar is so low, it's a tavern in Hell.

[@candypettynettie487]

The bar is in hell.

[@Kristen70364]

"The bar is already so low, but this dude brought a shovel."

[@pLanetstarBerry]

Dude really saw the bar there and mistook it for a game of limbo

[@2Bjaded1]

The bar is in an ever widening sinkhole.

[@cupcakecarl]

I hate these insecure dudes that act like they're all for their partner's wants, needs, etc. then just pull the rug and try to change their partners beliefs. Its sad and abusive behavior.

[@tully6648]

And such a waste of TIME!

[@happystarhappystar1477]

and so says the feminist who can't even stand sex-appeal

[@BruinPhD2009]

I'm always amazed at how quickly that "alpha male" behavior goes out the window when their partner decides they aren't gonna play along. I thought alphas didn't have to beg or grovel or compromise?

[@happystarhappystar1477]

@@BruinPhD2009 ooh look - despise men to feel great

[@salicaguillotines]

​@@BruinPhD2009 The classic last ditch attempt to salvage whatever relationship is still there lest the alpha male lives his whole life as an incel and preys on a much younger partner to establish power dynamics via gr00ming

[@queenwilco3723]

Lol my husband is an alpha male in the best ways. He doesn't need to listen to anyone to tell him how to be one, he makes decisions based on what's best for everyone involved, takes others in to consideration, take council from me before making decisions and not in a self serving way. A real alpha male doesn't need to feel power and control over others, it happens in how he genuinely cares and things about others, take control over situations that are out of control and delegate tasks and responsibilities, natural born leader, treats people as equals. People care about and trust him enough to follow his leadership. If you have to demand it, your power hungry and don't deserve it

[@AngryReptileKeeper]

This is a description of my boyfriend to a T. If I had to define what an "alpha" is, it would be that. Honor, integrity, loyalty, humility, fairness, kindness, patience and self-control. Those things inspire greater respect than any arrogant, ill-tempered, impulsive, posturing braggart could ever hope to gain.

[@queenwilco3723]

@@AngryReptileKeeper absolutely! This will garner the kind of respect that people want to follow their leadership, not be forced to. It's the difference in a real leader or a boss.

[@zarahfrancisco3734]

story 1 reminds me of another story where the guy was accusing his long time (almost 10 yrs) Indonesian gf of taking advantage of him by wanting to marry him for visa purposes (her work visa was about to expire, putting her high paying job in danger, and marrying her long time bf was the easiest fix). Turns out, he just wanted to be the 'man of the house' and earn more than the woman, and some other misogynistic bs. Goodluck with that on his teacher's salary. Meanwhile, the woman is now living her best life in France after being offered a job by his company in their European branch.

[@bessieburnet9816]

People need to stop calling it a "need" for sex. It is NOT a "need", it is a want, pure and simple.

[@AngryReptileKeeper]

I think people struggle to understand the difference between "need" and "want." Needs are things required to sustain your life like food, water and shelter. Wants are literally everything else. It can be argued that things like sex can be considered a _psychological_ need, in that your mental and emotional health may suffer without it, but nobody drops dead from lack of it.

[@vanguardangel6912]

I just don't understand why its so hard for these people to polish themselves off or just buy a toy or something. Maybe its cause I treat my own urges as more of part of my physical health but like, come ON yall! No one owes you sex! You don't NEED sex!

[@CyeOutsider]

​@vanguardangel6912 Absolutely. Just rub one out and get on with things if your partner can't accommodate once in a while. Why do you have to be demanding they put out. It's so entitled and selfish.

[@MasterBuilderDragon]

People: You don’t want to have sex with your boyfriend/girlfriend until you’re married? What kind of a relationship is that? Me: One that we know is based on genuine love, compatibility, and respect for each other and not satisfying our urges?

[@damien678]

​@@MasterBuilderDragon Good for you! And good for people that don't wait and want a partner they know they're sexually compatible with!

[@TinaWok-p4r]

The switch-up is real. 1st got together when she was 22, such a red flag.

[@ivyproductions7097]

So glad OP got out safely from that relationship. The way he acted when he came over was horrifying.

[@kerinsian8844]

Me too, the way he acted was straight out of the tate playbook. Him demanding sex as a right whenever he wants no matter why she doesn't want to is typical of tate. Had she given in she would have found his hands around her throat choking her (tate advises this too because it "resets her mind into her natural, passive state, womanly instincts" apparently it will forcibly put her into a state of acquiescence and mindless adoration to her lord and master) I may have the precise terminology incorrect here, but it's what he says, does, and advises his fans to do.

[@owl7072]

Story 1: Op: I wouldn't feel heard or valued Him: it's the best way to avoid arguments. 😃⁉️ How to nuke your relationship in one simple step: This shit ^^^^^

[@AngryReptileKeeper]

Honestly, if this is how he feels, it sounds like he'd be happier just buying a RealDoll.

[@susankaempfer8427]

I’d be like, well, how about we just do what I say? That would also avoid arguments.

[@kimberlyterasaki4843]

Always love how these supposed "Alpha Males" turn into nervous wrecks when they realize their girlfriends have self-respect and refuse to be treated badly. People who think like that are weak-willed and equate being abusive and controlling with being strong and respected.

[@madambutterfly1997]

If your best interest is at my expense, that’s an automatic dealbreaker

[@Sovreign071]

Story 1 update: sex is not a "need." It's a "want!" And this coming from a guy who's only sexual experience with a woman lead to her breaking up with me. Of course I *crave* it! But it's been ten years, and I haven't dropped dead yet!

[@DullestStar9299]

That's what I always say. Sex is ONLY a need if you want children, and even that's debatable with all the leaps and bounds made in the sciences.

[@impishrebel5969]

Actually a lot of doctors say sex is healthy and people need at least a minimal active sex life. I'm also a woman, by the way, I just actually read academic and scientific journals 🙄

[@Sovreign071]

@impishrebel5969 Good to know. Now I'm sad.

[@DullestStar9299]

@@impishrebel5969 Healthy doesn't mean it's needed... Meat is healthy, but people don't need it to survive. Grains are healthy, but you don't need them to survive. Why? Because you can consume substitutes and supplement with multivitamins. If one cannot get or does not like the act of sex, there are alternatives. The experience can be simulated. Sure, these scientific journals say that "sex is the greatest thing ever and everyone should be doing it," but that doesn't mean it's necessary to an individual's survival. So, what, it can boost moods? Well, cool. Eating certain foods boosts moods, exercising regularly boosts moods, and, yes, even drugs (don't do drugs, kids) can boost moods. Substitutes... You know. Unlike food and water, sex is not going to save you from starvation or give you a drink when you're suffering from heatstroke. So, yes, sex FOR PLEASURE is in fact a want. Sex for pleasure is like eating food just because you're bored. It serves no higher function. It does not aid in survival unless it's to preserve progeny (making future generations). Sex toys exist. Adult novels and other media exist. Again, substitutes. If you have a significant other whom you can have sex with, great. Not many people are that lucky, however, and you going around spewing this "sex is great and everyone should be doing it" is really damaging for them and to society. Sex really isn't a need, and anyone who thinks it is might need to get their head out of the gutter. Sex is NOT the number one need in life. You can live a fulfilling life without it. You can have relationships without it. You can survive without it. Please stop pushing this toxic, damaging, and psychologically inhumane jargon that sex is the absolute beez neez that can give you superpowers. That's the problem with most cultures and why (specifically) touch-starved men are so angry. We keep throwing how "amazing" this one act is, that they can't experience or get, in their faces instead of being supportive and offering other ways of seeing things. Sex positivity is toxic up to a point, and you're reaching.

[@CyeOutsider]

​@@impishrebel5969That might be true but forcing others to satiate that need is where it goes wrong.

[@Erebus04]

Story 1: These toxic misogynistic pod casters/Internet influencers is the death of so many relationships and are the Bane of this current generation, whatever their name is (the generation)

[@RisetoStrength]

Gender roles are valid, which is why these podcasters are so successful. It's just a shame that it's so difficult for men and women to live up to them.

[@botanicalitus4194]

@@RisetoStrengththese podcasters are successful because its easy to shiII the relationship advice equivaIent of snake oiI to desperate IoneIy maIes in exchange for cash. They're financiaIIy successfuI but so are some of the most eviI peopIe in the worId. reIationship wise, most of these guys dont have any stabIe long term relationships, cant keep a girI around for more than a coupIe of casuaI hookups, and a lot of them straight up have sxuaI abuse aIIegations or even charges against them. They are complete faiIures when it comes to having a good romantic reIationship

[@SCP01986]

@@RisetoStrength 'Gender roles' aren't valid because everybody is different as well as their circumstances, means and the people they're in a relationship with. There is no perfect cookie cutter set of commandments that work; what works for one couple is anathema to another.

[@WyntheRogue]

​@think-eh3fm They're outdated and unnecessary, if a man wants to be a house husband, he should be without being judged by backwards minded individuals,if a woman wants to be an epic business lady working a field she loves, living her dream while earning for her and her spouse then she too should without judgement. Gender roles are needlessly restricting and IMO complete bullshit set up by the status quo to justify privilege. The reality is a marriage should have equity to it as we human beings regardless of sex have hopes,dreams, goals in life and it wouldn't be fair to let only one succeed and acheive great things and the other be stuck miserable with only one option in life and feeling unfulfilled. Nuts to that. ETA- these "podcasters" are successful because they take advantage of vulnerable guys with low self esteem and give them toxic advice in order to hawk their products and make money off of them. They're cancerous grifters and have a mindset that needs to go extinct.

[@despinasgarden.4100]

​@@RisetoStrengtha traditional marriage with gender roles is only successful if BOTH partners in the relationship want it, in this case, he wanted her to work AND to take care of the home, that is not a traditional marriage. Those podcast are popular only because their audience are young, lonely and insecure men.

[@IrisAsuras]

Story 2: OMG - there was another story not long ago of two siblings who were adopted out separately and living in different areas who met, dated, and were together six years before finding out they were related. I think they were still together because they decided to just not have kids. With the surgery, I feel like it all came together so perfectly. Them finding each other, getting together and then the transplant. holy moly.

[@ladytrucker251]

Two minutes and 10 seconds in I'm cracking up laughing at her boyfriend's thinking

[@Loverboy0694]

Yea. This guy is a nutcase

[@JasperCatProductions]

Hilarious, this dude who makes less $$$ wants to be large and in charge. Fudge that crap, dump him, block him and move on.

[@botanicalitus4194]

"I have two other half sisters so I have dating options down the road if I needed" OP was so wrong for that 😂 But Im glad things ended up ok for them

[@MsAnpassad]

No, that was hilarious. 😄

[@ginathecookie]

Wrong but so hilarious 😂

[@AutumnFire1414]

@@ginathecookie Well, sometimes you have to laugh, otherwise you'd be crying. Considering the mental/emotional blow-bodyslam OP and his wife received, I'm glad they were able to choose laughing.

[@potatoempress5731]

I heard a similar story to Story 2 and this is why..... pre-adoption and pre-marriage needed better genealogy testing and steps because I'm feelin nuts hearing all these Alabama stories more frequently

[@mousepariah3884]

Especially with all the horror stories that are coming out about IVF/Donor kids. Like this very easily could be a case of OP being a "teen oops" baby and his wife being the result of an undisclosed donor conception because "The Kid doesn't need to know" was like fucking policy back in the day

[@impishrebel5969]

Yeah and testing blows open the privacy clause many people want when donating and don't want random bio kids coming up, there would be far fewer people donating without it. This isn't an "alabama" story and stop insulting people who, through no fault of their own, have these things happen to them. It's happened before long before testing and dna was even a thing and the world didn't end. Grow up.

[@psyolytesaille]

​@@impishrebel5969well something has got to give. Either less ppl donate due to not having full privacy over their genetics, or we keep having siblings, full/half/quarter/whatever, end up together. For the latter there can't be any judgement unless they were full that grew up together.

[@samoanjoseph1457]

Story 2: "So I have dating options down the road if needed." Okay, that one made me laugh out loud. Great story.

[@madambutterfly1997]

Once again we’ve lost another semi decent guy to Andrew Tate. Or was he always like this

[@Batman-lg2zj]

Andrew Tate isn’t a bad guy

[@owl7072]

​@@Batman-lg2zjNo. Just no.

[@botanicalitus4194]

@@Batman-lg2zjlol ok bud

[@StriderVM]

​@@Batman-lg2zjLOL. What benefit does he gove to society?

[@madambutterfly1997]

@@Batman-lg2zj well he’s not a decent human being either. The tard believes that men are genetically designed to cheat on their partners

[@maurer3d]

Story 1: NTA (of course), your BF didn't change, he just decided to show you who he truly is.

[@jameshutchinson2817]

I've heard of a somewhat similar story, where a fertility Dr used his own "sample" to impregnant a bunch of woman. Inadvertently becoming a Lannister is a brutal pill to swallow.

[@jgw5491]

Donald Cline? What a scuz! Cline has rheumatoid arthritis which would preclude him being a sperm donor at his own clinic, and some his fraudulent progeny have being turning up with autoimmune problems. And most of them live in a rather small area in Indiana, so they worry about dating or marrying their own siblings. Ugh!

[@damien678]

That dude is a mass-rapist WTAF

[@LoveK1]

Yep, they made a documentary about him.

[@nannaleifa]

So he's the breadloser yet still wants the woman to "submit". Yeah, no.

[@lisear2926]

"The bread loser"😄 Good one 👍. You know I'm stealing it, right❓☺️

[@ajoyner614]

​@lisear2926 Dude same.☠️☠️🤣

[@TheApatheticPanda]

It's not sudden. He was hoping she was too far in to say no.

[@eleanoraddy4683]

Amazes me how many years people can fake it before the switch up. Blimey!

[@AndyyWithAY]

Story 2 I can't believe we haven't read this one before. This reminds me of a House episode where a couple had gotten married then found out they were half sibs. The dad was against the relationship and they thought it was racial(IR couple), but that was actually why. I honestly can't say I blame him for how he handled anything. If she hadn't needed that damn kidney none of this c would've ever come out. I hope everyone stays healthy

[@ginathecookie]

I remember that episode. I also remember commenting that the father should uh handled things a bit better than flying off the handle. Would have saved a lot of heartache even if he didn't tell the full truth. And yeah agreed for story. Most doctors think information like this should wait until someone is in the clear and he did. I feel sorry for OP too, it must have been so shocking to find that out. I hope they all stay healthy too

[@stan8479]

I thought we had read that story before? I recall it.

[@mariecherrytree]

😊

[@AndyyWithAY]

@@stan8479 I thought so, but Mark usually says we've read this before, but there are new updates. He didn't this time

[@AndyyWithAY]

@ginathecookie Yea IDK why "that's your half sister" was so hard to articulate? 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️

[@cheskydivision]

Op needs to tell bf to follow the advice from the duck dynasty guys “ to find a 15 year old to marry before they are educated and start thinking for themselves”. Op change locks and passwords on everything.

[@alyzu4755]

Story 1: Befire the update I was hoping she'd break it off. That update was terrifying! She's feeling the effects of attempted s*xual coercion, at the very least. 😞

[@kp2223]

Title alone says dump him

[@idoughnotknow]

The wife in story two seems to have a wonderful sense of humour and just a great human all round.

[@Mewse1203]

"Dating options" 😂😂😂

[@macylouwho1187]

I had a few of these moments in the very beginning with my husband who had issues and insecurities from being cheated on in the past. He tried the old college try of “you can’t do that, or you can’t wear that.” At which case I laughed and I laughed and I laughed some more, patted him and said “ooooohhh honey, it’s cute that you think you get to tell me what I can and cannot do. Nice try.” I’ve had to tell him “I’m not her, I’m not guilty of her crimes. I act nothing like her. Your insecurities are unfounded in THIS relationship and they are on you to fix. And no you don’t get to control me. You either love me as is or you don’t, so you decide that.” That very quickly ended any attempt to try and eventually he learned to trust me implicitly. Just because someone says that they should get to control you or have the final decision on something doesn’t mean that you should humor their bullsh-t or give them their way. You don’t hand your own power or decision making capabilities over to someone else unless you’re ready for a miserable freakin’ life of disrespect, disregard, and dissatisfaction for, like, EVER. No no no thank you. An equal partnership is a happy one. I don’t run him and he doesn’t run me. We are partners, fair and square. Or “nothing” at all. That’s the tone you set in the beginning of any relationship unless, again, you like being utterly miserable and dead inside. That goes for either sex because women absolutely can be guilty of this too. I’ve got a mom like this and they both are so sick and so unhappy inside that it kills them both because she is a petty tyrant and he is always her victim. And for that neither one are happy, not even a little. And that never fails to happen in major power imbalance relationships. Even the person who has all of the power isn’t happy and isn’t smart enough to realize what they’ve done to both of them and how they’ve ruined their own relationship. Why aren’t the “power” ones happy? Because they have their partner so dam- broken down and miserable that they don’t even like or respect them anymore because they don’t have to. And most times they can’t even remember what it was about that person that made them love them to begin with-because they are a shell of their former selves. They are unrecognizable as that person that once was-full of life and spark and happiness and joy. All gone. They’ve ruined them with all that control and abuse. Only fools do this. And only fools listen and follow the orders-because this is “exactly” the end result every single time without fail. Misery and unhappiness for both parties. And no love left on either side, not really. You become robots in that unhappiness. Feeling the true feelings feels like sh-t, so you become numb to each other. Monotonous, dead inside. I’ve watched this garbage play out on both sides in different relationships and it’s always the same thing no matter who it is. Toxic AF. Just don’t do this if you are wise enough to want to be happy. Happy doesn’t necessarily come from getting your own way 100% of the time no matter how tempting that sounds. Because in the end we all need to be checked on bad behavior sometimes when we are truly out of line-and that means with a partner too. Your partner should be able to stand firm and tell you “no!” when it’s important that you hear that. It’s called a boundary and everyone should have them without question-and they should be firm and have consequences when broken. That’s the only way everything stays fair and happy in a relationship for both people.

[@BlenderInGame]

Wow. This was a good read and you are a very wise person! It's so sad the part where you sad the abusers ruined their partner to the point where they don't even recognize the person they fell in love with anymore. Have you ever seen any types of this dynamic reversed, or the damage reverse in any way?

[@macylouwho1187]

@@BlenderInGame not that I can think of. I’ve never seen a reversal because the people who got so beat down in the relationship just really can’t fight back once this pattern is well established. If they try the abuse escalates because their partner is not going to allow them any leverage or to fight back. They double down. That’s why I mentioned that it’s so important to be strong in the beginning of the relationship because it sets the tone of the entire relationship. Everyone tests boundaries to see what they can get away with. I have only seen some of them just up and leave though. The lucky ones can get out. And hopefully find someone different than their previous abusive partner. Abuse can definitely be emotional and controlling. It’s not always physical.

[@AndyyWithAY]

I do want a traditional marriage, but I'm going to find a like minded man, not force this on a man who wants b something else. Also it costs to be the boss. You don't get to not be the breadwinner AND be man of the house. What's between your legs doesn't mean you get to make the rules. There's nothing to salvage here. He literally told you he doesn't want you to ever challenge him. That's not traditional, that's misogyny. He has told you he wants you to be the breadwinner and his slave. Run

[@RisetoStrength]

Traditional marriage is quite difficult to manage these days. Keeping a low bodycount helps.

[@jiminkaijinyoungnikkie9921]

​@@RisetoStrength🤮🤮🤮

[@georgeprchal3924]

Yeah that seems kinda stupid, does he expect her to just quit her job then? Has he anticipated how that drop in income would affect things?

[@SCP01986]

@@georgeprchal3924 No no, he wanted her to keep working as she made more AND do all the cooking and the cleaning and the washing and basically be his slave as well as his sex doll/ATM.

[@RisetoStrength]

@@jiminkaijinyoungnikkie9921 Give it a shot; tell the person you want to marry you've got a high bodycount! See where it gets you.

[@jenndowden8131]

Story about kidney donation- lol at the wife asking if they knew he came in for the kidney transplant upon seeing him with the eye-patch.

[@theeverdreamwitch]

That second story is incredibly wholesome, despite the circumstances. That’s the kind of relationship to strive for (minus being blood related, of course. 😂)

[@radish6740]

All that wholesome incest

[@AndyyWithAY]

I was yesterday years old when I learned that the Michelin tires(tyres for my UK mates 😜) were related to Michelin stars at the restaurant.

[@kp2223]

😂

[@Swnsasy]

Hey bestie!! I have one!! I was today years old when I finally got the commercial for Kay Jewlers.. "Every Kiss Begins with Kay." OOOH, KAY, LIKE OK, KISS, KAY!! OMGOSH I GET IT!! 🤣 Husband said, see, this is why I say yep, she's got a PhD and book smart, but she has no damn sense😂😂😂😂😂

[@Swnsasy]

@@LostSoulchild89 A what?! 😂Thank you! I'm going searching for some videos!! WOOHOO!

[@SusanPederson]

​@@SwnsasyI was 62! My husband found it hilarious.😂

[@Swnsasy]

@@SusanPederson Haha, you too!?! 🤣I've been hearing it since I was a teenager, I'm 47.. It just never clicked LOL... You're my spirit human 🤗🥰🤣

[@patdpm3807]

Story 2 I've been wondering about unknown half siblings dating, marrying and having children ever since sperm donor banks came into being. This could become a mess in the future if some genetic problems are hidden in their DNA. I wonder if in a few decades couples will need to have DNA testing before they conceive? I'm glad everything turned out well for them.

[@MsAnpassad]

No, it won't. The problem only arise if they do it over and over again. You need a closed of society with no/very little new DNA for genetic problems to become a thing (like the Amish).

[@patdpm3807]

You're probably right. North America has a huge genetic DNA pool.@@MsAnpassad

[@ettinakitten5047]

DNA testing couples before they have kids is a eugenics nightmare. Only time I'd think it was a good idea is if it was entirely voluntary *and* people weren't likely to judge you for opting out. Or judge parents of disabled kids on the assumption that they chose not to get tested and that's why they had disabled kids. (Just like parents of disabled kids already get attacked by people who assume it's their fault in some way.)

[@patdpm3807]

You've made some good points. But I was thinking of those children who know they were conceived from donor sperm or were adopted. Like cystic fibrosis, sickle cell anemia etc... This comes from a personal family experience. My SIL passed from ALS and she was insistent that her 4 children be tested. She was terrified her children and future grandchildren might have inherited this awful disease from her.@@ettinakitten5047

[@madgevanness4011]

And since children born from sperm donors or adoption are not always told about same, they may never know.

[@vampireladyish]

Story 2 Adoption and insemination is why I think people should get DNA testing before dating and especially before getting married.

[@traetrae11]

Story 2: I’m happy that the two of them are doing well and his wife has pulled through her surgery. I agree it’s a bit too late to consider separation anyway but on the bright side their kids will always have a sister/brother cousin to hang out with and a wonderful Mom/Aunt and Dad/Uncle to take care of them.

[@taylorslade961]

Story 2: Oof. This sucks. I know DNA isn't important as far as interpersonal relationships go but DNA does matter. This is something that can have long term and far reaching effects on more than just OP and his wife. This kind of thing is why history is important. The life and death of King Charles II of Spain could have taught everyone involved in this why DNA is so important.

[@MsAnpassad]

Actually no. The issue only arise for close relatives to have kids if you do it several times over the generations. This is why OP and his wife have to tell at least their kids about them being related.

[@dominicwehrmann8515]

@@MsAnpassad Actually yes. Even one generation, as here, can pass down genetic diseases. Dad Carrier and Mom Carrier would result in a 25/50/25 split. With two being carriers themselves, one affected and one not affected and not carrying. Why is there always someone defending half-sibling inbreeding? Just because one generation won't cause the Habsburger lip, the bleeder gen was passed down from a single person to most nobility in Europe. Yes, this also includes random people being carriers but it's more likely in this case. Their dad could have been a carrier for one thing, and the respective moms be another carrier. Boom, children have 75% of being at least a carrier.

[@MsAnpassad]

@@dominicwehrmann8515 This scientist "defends" by correcting misconceptions people have. Thank you for using the Habsburger example, as it supports what I wrote.

[@ginathecookie]

​@@dominicwehrmann8515I think because in this situation there is little they could have done differently Hindsight is 20/20 so maybe with that they would have but who knows. Basically it's too late now. Not to mention I think they were more concerned with correcting than defending.

[@ettinakitten5047]

@@dominicwehrmann8515 The "bleeder gene" you're talking about isn't even related to inbreeding, lol. It's an X-linked trait, it's expressed in sons who inherit it regardless of who their father was.

[@zacharydobbins6267]

I rolled when he said ‘so I got future dating options.’ That was hilarious

[@poohbear4515]

We’re not living in the 1800s. Marriage means equality which means the wife can cook, clean, and other basic necessities while the husband also cooks, cleans, and help out even if one or both work. Not let the wife slave away while husband can come home and laze around not doing anything to help. OP’s pretty lucky that Bf is now showing early red/black flags and she should really rethink her relationship before tying the not.

[@RisetoStrength]

Men still want to be the head of the house, it's in their DNA. There's nothing wrong with it, but society is headed somewhere that just doesn't work.

[@katinkaraab1964]

This ist what erks me the most in my country (Europe) the only time married couples could afford in general (Like at least 50% of population) to not work was during the 1980. And somehow people who were born during that time frame are now running around claming that this is the traditional way. No honey, woman haven't stayed home for the last 2000 years of documented human history, in fact they have worked for the last 1900 and only now it is feasible for some people to have one parent staying home while putting their childern at an disadvantage ( economically speaking)

[@georgeprchal3924]

​@@katinkaraab1964there's over 40 countries in Europe. Which one?

[@ginathecookie]

​@@georgeprchal3924you know, it could be they didn't want to share which one and thus just said the area it was in

[@Ashbrash1998]

Even in the 1800s women were working, ESPECIALLY with the men gone. We still had to manage the household, the animals, the crops and be self sufficient with clothes, manage money, etc.

[@sienkiewiczmonika1161]

Story 1: Run. Arguments should NOT be avoided, they should be resolved. Avoiding arguments = building resentment and a few years later he will be "blindsided" by divorce.

[@seansmall9910]

the sad part is.... he missed the point of being the man of the house, you can't be the decision maker and have your wife be the bread winner.....

[@delmarhi]

Story 2 op is marvelous. The dating options comment was beautiful.

[@louisenorkjaer8307]

S2: the "dating options" comment about the other half sisters ended me. They've got a great sense of humour as a couple... they must get it from their dad 👀😂😂😂

[@thundercatmeg631]

Story2… I don’t care if they are half siblings, I love their love and banter. They already have kids and it was an honest mistake so frankly I just wish them the best

[@jackiea.7971]

Dude- I think this is the only incestual relationship I was ever rooting for them to stay together. Damn what a rollercoaster & bizarre situation.

[@juanhaines7295]

Story 2 I heard this one before. I'm glad everything worked out for them. Hopefully their children or their grandchildren won't there any genetic problems.

[@botanicalitus4194]

Same. Its unlikely for them to suffer from genetic issues unless they have multiple generations of this type of thing so I think their kids and so will be ok

[@MsAnpassad]

Very unlikely. It's only a problem if their kids have kids together etc. It's actually perfectly legal here in Sweden for halfsiblings to marry and our laws are based purely on science. Not that it's common here at all, but legal nonetheless.

[@Rogue-bt4wp]

​@@MsAnpassadeeeewwwwww...sorry but that is disgusting.

[@MsAnpassad]

@@Rogue-bt4wp Your disgust is a social construct.

[@Rogue-bt4wp]

@@MsAnpassad sure.. because having sex or a romantic relationship with a sibling is soooo appealing and beautiful and romantic. They literally share the same FATHER! Imagine that your FIL is also your FATHER. WTF is wrong with you?

[@JayeEllis]

Just NO. It does not make sense in today's society to be financially dependent on your partner. Traditionally, marriage was an extremely risky proposition for women, who were then trapped. Frankly, that's a dangerous flag to be waving... Is that what he wants, you trapped with no way out? That's scary AF.

[@GrumpyOldFart2]

Uh, no. You missed the part where he wanted her to keep working (she also had a higher income than him). So she wouldn’t exactly have been trapped. But that’s besides the point. He wanted his cake and eat it too. So he wanted the untraditional wife who works, but also wanted her to obey his every command. Probably wanted him to hand over her paycheck to him and then he would give her an “allowance” FROM HER OWN MONEY. More than an “alpha male”, he was also just a mooch. Wouldn’t have surprised me if after marriage he would quit his job, or maybe go part time so he could lollygag on her dime.

[@SuperCleopatrajones]

​@snakebte1 even if you are in a relationship where you are financially dependent on your partner that doesn't mean you don't have a plan b.

[@JayeEllis]

@@SuperCleopatrajones Having a plan B means you are not financially dependent. If you have the ABILITY to earn your own way, how are you trapped?

[@catherinetiernan5888]

Leave him where you found him,this is the biggest RED FLAĢ.

[@ArcaneNim]

Happy timezone, Mark! I'm listening while dealing with eye issues tbat are causing vision problems/pain in one eye, and your voice is a welcome distraction. Thanks for being awesome and making videos. Hope you are doing well.❤

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

I'm sorry I hope it will be resolved soon 🤗🤗💜💜

[@ArcaneNim]

​@broken_queer_but_fighting8589 Thank you! Luckily, it is more annoying than scary. I've had it before, and while it is autoimmune related, it settles down with a week of prescription eye drops. I should be restarting treatment for my Crohn's by the end of the year and that's what causes the eye issue.

[@misscheesecake7282]

Story 1. My ex had a similar logic...me birng sick, in pain or tired...tough luck. I should suck it up and think about his needs and just have sex anyway....main reason hes a ex. Hell he was upset i slept for three days with covid cuz what about him....main reason hes a ex

[@JudeDragon158]

If god had a sense of humour he’d have gotten a certain 🍆disfunction from covid…. No more for you unless you treat your partners with care!

[@telinhajp]

Good riddance!

[@misscheesecake7282]

@@telinhajp thank you. Best decision I think I could of made.

[@damien678]

That dude's a rapist wtf

[@telinhajp]

Good afternoon, Mark and Poppy! Big hugs from Tokyo! ❤️🤗

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜

[@freudulant]

My ex did the exact same thing. Wanted me to submit to him so he can have the positives of cosplaying the head of the house without being the protector and provider

[@επιθετικόακτινιδιο]

St1: He will be the leader of the house? He will decide about everything , No questioning of his decisions? Nobody would have said that in this way, not even 50 years ago. Sex according to his needs? Not only sexist AF but dehumanizing also. He shouldn't walk away thinking that this bs is valid or accepted. Someone must warn him that he parked his horse in the wrong century. Wth? Unbelievable jerk

[@maxinemyers9215]

Love OP’s writing so sweet and funny ❤️Thanks Mark💐

[@susankaempfer8427]

Bwa hahaha ha…. 😐 So, he wants to tell you how to spend the money you’re going to earn and you’re not allowed to argue… As one commenter said, I would have laughed the whole time I packed.

[@lisear2926]

Re 1st Story:Tell boyfriend - "I don't sometimes always always get what I want". Boyfriend is funny.. Boy bye.

[@mandyj2809]

Story 1: OP’s fiancé obviously miscalculated when to unmask himself. He thought she was too naive and invested to just bounce after the 🚩 🚩 🚩were showing.

[@Alissandre_Iskander]

"Being sick is not excuse to not have sex" ??? Excuse me??? NO is a complete sentence. If someone doesn't want to have sex, you CANNOT make them. That is rape - even in a relationship, that is rape. He's a monster.

[@drewthistlethwaite8909]

So like my friend studies genetics. If it’s the first slip up for a very very long time ie about a thousand years, you’re “usually fine”.

[@MsAnpassad]

Exactly. The Amish and the nobility are prime examples of that you have to do it several times for problems to arise.

[@invisigoth510]

This is like those towns in what they call the cancer belt where there is a lot of serious childhood illness & disease They try to claim it’s something in the environment but when there was a bit of a deeper dive they found only the children of families who had been there for generations were affected. Children of families who were new to the area were not affected Studies are still going on but I think what they’re going to find is that the affected families are related & have been intermarrying with each other for so long that they have mutations that make them susceptible to certain cancers & illness

[@lizzykayOT7]

Story 2 - man, what a hit to the gut. I would be floored and don't know if I could come back from that. OP and his wife seem to have a great relationship and are very stable, I wish them luck. At least they'll get their kids tested. I wish them the best.

[@actuallynotsteve]

Also dude went from alpha chad, in his own mind, to crying and begging her to not leave, so fucking funny. Sounds about right.

[@j_g9109]

A long time ago, a bf of mine started up on traditional gender roles. I cheerfully said SURE! He was so happy… until I started sending him applications, taking notes of places that were hiring, trying to show him how to write out a monthly budget of “our” income, suggesting ways to update his resume and pushing him to do the more physical stuff around the house. He never even looked for a job. Surely he didn’t expect to work while taking care of our multiple children?!? That wasn’t very manly (according to him, Not me.) We didn’t last much longer lol. It’s been almost 2 decade; I’m sure he’s matured since then, but it still makes me chuckle.

[@angelaa7388]

"So I have dating options down the road" 😂😂😂

[@dr.jennapetersonap3874]

RED FLAG: 1st story- she EARNS MORE, is willing to let him contribute based on income and NOW he wants "traditional roles?" Put on your big boy pants, son, you're about to be read for Filth.

[@PlasticBluVentRabbit]

Glad that we all know that once they start listening to those podcasts, it’s no use. And I love that he’s all “alpha male” and whatnot, but as soon as she’s done with him he’s all whiny and pleading for forgiveness and such. Things like this only speed up the end of a relationship

[@ettinakitten5047]

Only time I'd be OK with an SO watching that stuff is if it's to criticize them.

[@Zaddy-Lu]

In my experience, if your SO only promises to change when you break up with them for their behavior, even though you've been telling them for weeks/months/years how their behavior negatively effects you, they won't even try to change, just refrain from acting terrible until they think you've been lulled back into a false sense of security.

[@randomusername3873]

The problem with those modern day podcasts is that when they talk about relationship is never about having an healty one, is only about what you can get from the other person So you have the "woman stays at home doing chores and gives me sex whenever I want", and the "man needs to pay for everything take all the initiative while I just stay there and receive gifts", which are dangerously common on social media

[@TheRealVenna]

LOL!!😂😂😂 Dude has a dark, twisted side to his humor saying, two more half sisters gives him more dating options! That killed me. I am typing this from the after life now.

[@SakuraMoonflower]

1:28 Tell him you'll agree to the traditional roles, but only on one condition: they have to be Japanese traditional gender roles. Husband works, wife maintains household. Watch him jump to agree. Later mention that all Japanese traditional husbands fork over 80% of their monthly pay checks to their wives while being permitted "only" 20% of their own pay checks for themselves. It's a matter of state law. 😂❤🎉 Watch him IMMEDIATELY back off from wanting "traditional" roles.😂❤🎉 And that should tell you everything you need to know right there about the kind of person your bf actually is.😂😅❤🎉 Run, don't walk, away from this garbage person, OP!

[@JEPiper]

"I, 25 female, and my boyfriend, 33 male--" I already see where this is going...

[@georgeprchal3924]

People can be 30, the trick is to not be a jerk.

[@JEPiper]

@@georgeprchal3924 I'm aware; I'm "36, female" myself. But I can also spot the pattern.

[@cluppip]

Story 1: Run it is not worth it mom did that and regrets it to this day.

[@Lladychuu]

I thought I wrote the story when I first read the title. Absolutely the same thing has happened. 2 years of actively (not passively) agreeing with me than turning it around and wanting "traditional" gender roles. I asked why the fuck he was with me for 2 years when I told him what I expected from a relationship from day 1. He said "I thought you'd change" sooo you tried to gaslight, manipulate and destroy my self-confidence but gave up when you realized I did not need you? Grrreeeaatt yeah perfect. What a healthy relationship!

[@patheon9541]

story 2: now normally i draw a line of reality and fiction for incest...it's bad irl but i think stories like this are the big acception cause....how would you ever know just glad things worked out on their end

[@catalinaplaza7909]

Story 1: GIRL RUN!!

[@CarinaCoffee]

Story 1: I'd have been petty and propose a matriarchal hierarchy. That way you can avoid arguments 😂

[@maranathaschraag5757]

first story - the guy wants to be in charge and make all unilateral decisions with no argument. When she unilaterally decides to end the relationship, he argues and begs. ironic...

[@EllieC130]

While I think a lot these guys like in story 1 wore a mask than whole time, I think it’s risky to assume that a reasonably decent person can’t be radicalized.

[@Passions5555]

I agree. They get high off of the validation they get. I wonder if OP's fiance will honestly reflect on why he lost her or if he will just become embittered and blame all women for his situation.

[@onurkneezb]

22:25 LOL... gonna get my banjo now...

[@jessicapalmer3455]

Story 1: My husband and I are in "traditional" gender roles, and it works for us. Will it work for every family? No. But even with that "tradition" in our marriage, I still have my husband's respect in that he listens to me and I generally have a say in every decision. The fact that the boyfriend feels this dominant is a giant NOPE. Stupid "alpha" bull honky. 💙💙

[@RisetoStrength]

It's an increasing problem. Men need to feel needed.

[@RaspberryHugs]

​@@RisetoStrength Well women aren't held back to the point where they need a man to survive anymore. Men need to learn that being wanted is over all better. It's better to have someone who chooses you everyday then have someone whose desperately clinging to you because they'll be homeless and penniless if they don't.

[@RaspberryHugs]

Exactly. If a man is able and happy to fulfill the role of a traditional husband then fantastic idea to be in a traditional marriage. The problem is so many men say they want a traditional wife but they aren't willing to take on the responsibilities of a traditional husband.

[@RisetoStrength]

@@RaspberryHugs For either sex, being both needed and wanted is better. It's safer and more fulfilling. Men will always seek this and will see it as an upgrade from a relationship where they're only wanted. Successful women in their 30s are having the most difficulty locking down a long-term relationship right now than any other demographic, and it only gets worse with age. Men that are capable (this is rare) and willing to fulfil the role of a traditional husband would rather find their wife overseas, from places where women don't believe in divorce and have more reasons to fully commit.

[@Smash_Nash]

​@think-eh3fm this is why the only women who will ever date an abuser like you are vulnerable individuals. Because you are a loser with incredibly low value. No woman of any worth would ever touch you with a 10 foot stick.

[@Mango_Dragon637]

The BF got to confident then back tracked when OP broke up with him.😂

[@jennyanswer42]

The toxicity comes from people thinking (or being told) that they deserve a particular kind of treatment. Any treatment you get is earned. If you want submissive women, you must be a man worthy and trustworthy to gain that.

[@user-blob]

Who the hell wants submissive women?

[@LoveK1]

Right! True submission comes from trust and safety.

[@dodgyyoutuber9560]

I honestly don’t see them as siblings. It’s too late for that. They have zero sibling relationship or identity and they’ve built something completely new. I wish them happiness. But I totally get if someone couldn’t get over that. The difference between this and typical incest is that the typical know, and they have a sibling relationship that has been corrupted by mental sickness, perversion and abuse. With this, there was none of that. It’s just a co-incidence. Put it in a box and burry it and PRAY YOUR KIDS DON”T FIND OUT AAARARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!! The dating options joke is hilarious. I’m so relieved they took it well.