My breastfeeding journey (it didn't go to plan...)

Sometimes we just can't predict how things are going to work out, and breastfeeding has definitely taught me that!
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[@PoppyHatake]

Oh my god!!! I learned everything about menstrual cups from you about a decade ago when I was doing my bachelor's. Your candid and calm way of explaining such sensitive topics really helped me a lot in understanding my own body. Your channel was a real comfort and such a safe space for me because I grew up in an environment where discussing or asking anything about our periods was taboo and just ridiculous. Your channel turned up in my feed randomly after so long, feels like I've run into an old friend after a long time. It's amazing to see that you're a mom now! Congratulations! I'm sure it's going to be a hard journey ahead, but I'm happy to see you thriving in life! All the best!

[@rachelisntcool]

Thanks for sharing this. We had a really rough breastfeeding journey and this resonated a lot. Not identical, but my boy was getting nothing from me in the first few days and we ended up in the NICU with him losing so much weight and getting dehydrated. I combi fed after that until he turned a month old but he had severe CMPA and my supply was still almost non existent so I stopped BF/pumping a lot earlier than I would have wanted. One thing I found was that all the "breast is best" advocates, particularly through NHS and health visitors, were not good at spotting when things were going wrong, I think they were too tunnel visioned on the "every woman can breast feed" approach and didn't want to acknowledge any alternative. I am pretty sure I have IGT and will definitely look into that drug if I have another baby. Glad that you have found an approach that works for you both, hearing you tell your story has brought back a lot of emotions - who knew feeding could be such a challenge!

[@rebeccafinn1343]

I just had my first baby four days ago. I am struggling so much with breastfeeding right now. Doing skin to skin with my little one asleep on me right now and this video came at the perfect time. Thank you for sharing❤️

[@rebeccaa2097]

Is so hard!

[@jgr_lilli_]

Congrats on your baby! Bless your heart, the first few weeks are so tumultuous. Please do not beat yourself up when it doesn't work out, you are a champ.

[@dubhlinn2]

You don’t have to struggle alone! See a board-certified lactation consultant (IBCLC)-they have the highest level of training in lactation. They get 1,000 hours of supervised training in addition to college courses and a board exam. (compared to a pediatrician who only gets 10 hours of lactation training, and no exam). And I highly recommend the books by Amy Brown of the University of Swansea.

[@teganmartin8751]

Look up Possums resources

[@Littlebluebirdie1]

It’s a full time job but honestly it gets easier. My advice is ignore the clock, if your baby squeaks put them on the boob. You cannot over feed them. For the first 6 weeks you just sit under that baby and feed as much as possible. If you’re experiencing pain though reach out for help and get the latch checked. Also tongue tie.

[@courtneypaige11100]

We had a suspected CMPA diagnosis too and I was dairy free from 3 months to 9 months. GI doctor recommended introducing dairy at 9 months and he did beautifully. Which is great, but also makes me wonder if he was ever actually intolerant. I wish there was a black and white answer!

[@jordanleggett3845]

❤I was the first to like your video 😊that never happens🥰! I of course always watch your videos completely through! I’ve always enjoyed your videos from your very 1st video ❤! Breastfeeding 🤱 is such a journey-i breastfeed both my babies…My daughter latched right away and I never had an issue’s with her latch, however she had a really hard time gaining weight because she too had a very serious milk protein allergy and soy allergy too… I had to supplement with very expensive formula that I had to order specifically from drugstore formula as well and boy was upset about having to do that…I don’t have any issues with formula and I do stand by fed is best…However those emotions that come with breastfeeding and wanting them to be fed by you…I completely understand! I also wish I knew about domperidone like I did with my son! My son’s breastfeeding experience was completely smooth sailing once he figured out a good latch and because of the domperidone I never had difficulty with low supply…I also pumped regularly with my son and I think between meds and breastfeeding a lot and pumping really helped. Anyway sorry for the long message! Love from Ottawa Canada 🇨🇦 Ps. I really happy to hear your adorable cutie patootie lil man is on track and thriving well🥰🥹❤️!

[@justmeek]

I breastfed my second child till she was 18months old. She was in the 10th percentile and our child and youth health were telling me at 8 months that I needed to give her formula because she hadn't gained any weight since a prior weigh in. She hadn't lost any, just hadn't gained any. No doctor was ever concerned because she was a happy baby, had more than enough wet nappies in a 24hr period.. was content and wasn't LOSING any. Another thing that the doctors said, was that because her height was in the 10th percentile, they weren't fussed that her weight was because she was on par with height and weight both being at 10th percentile. They even said she could drop two centile lines before they would be concerned. She was just a small baby. I'm interested in knowing what Orins height centile was. Keep in mind, my baby would some weeks gain only 20g.. and then in 5 days would gain 840g. Make it make sense. That's the joy of breastfeeding. Sadly, formula feeding follow a line. They always gain roughly the same amount. That's not how it works with breastmilk. I feel like if your babies latch is fine, they aren't losing any weight, more than 5+ wet nappies in a 24hr period, and they are happy and content - you're doing perfectly fine. Not to mention if he looks healthy. There's so much emphasis about weight and centiles. But you can have two deviations above or below on the weight than what their height centile is and be perfectly fine. Also, nursing will pump milk far better than a pump. Another thing, cluster feeding is a GOOD sign - that's how babies boost your supply. More suction - more milk. Absolutely normal.

[@QuintessentialStefie]

I tried so hard with my twins, but my body just didn’t want to make milk. I literally tried everything; medication, pumping every 3 hours around the clock, etc. I gave up after a month and it was so much better for my mental health.

[@CarolineJuneee]

Appreciate you sharing your story. It does sound emotionally draining! Kudos to you for getting through it

[@elizabethm3663]

I feel like i went through very similar situation (with a few differences). I felt so alone through it, the pressure I put on myself to breastfeed was so anxiety inducing. I only made it to 9 weeks before having to move to fully formula fed. I appreciate this video so much, i feel like my experience mustn’t be as uncommon as i thought. my son is now 20 months and doing great.

[@Sammie-Lou-Miss-UK]

I was always told by my midwife Fed is best… xxxx

[@ratmalschonweiter1734]

Hey, I love your video series, thanks so much for sharing your story ❤ Idk if you answered this already, but if not, my question for your next q&a is: did you consider co-parenting with a friend instead of solo motherhood? And what led to you deciding to do it solo? If you don't mind sharing about this... I am at this point right now, trying to figure out whether i want to do it alone or with a male (gay) friend, so my child would be able to have a father... but there are so many pros and cons for both options, it's super difficult... I know, it's different for everyone and super personal, but I'm just looking for different opinions and perspectives on this.

[@salo81]

You are such a good mom and its really good to share your story. Happy Holidays for you and your family!

[@gravic48]

Please let go of the Mum guilt, you are doing such an amazing job and you were always doing the best you could with the info you had at the time, that is all we can ever do. The learning here should be for those who supported you, particularly the pro feeders, they don't have the emotional attachment and they should be able to recommend you try cutting dairy and soya from your diet x

[@buzzi2k]

Gosh you've been through a lot. You're doing so well. You're completely right in both your conclusions, and I think this video will help many people xx

[@kalaniblake8699]

My son is almost 5 months and we had a similar journey. We also seemed to have everything figured out, he latched within the first 24 hours, it seemed like a good latch, my milk came in within the first three days, he had wet diapers, we even did a weighted feed at three days old and he was getting over 1 oz in ten minutes which I guess is really good according to the lactation consultant. I was really happy that things were going well, I was using the haaka to collect extra milk and freeze it, everything seemed good. But we suffered a big loss in my family a few weeks after my son was born and I think the stress and grief caused my milk supply to go down. My son started to cry and fuss more in the evenings and it felt like my breasts were empty. I started weighing him at home and could tell that although he was gaining weight, it wasn't enough to stay in his percentile. He was born in the 11th, fell to the 5th and then the 3rd, and then he was in the 1st. I had started to top him off with my frozen milk in the evenings, but soon that was all gone. I think fed is best, but I agree that it was incredibly emotional to be forced to combination feed without making the decision yourself. He now gets anywhere from 1 to 4 formula bottles if he still seems hungry, some days he doesn't want any and it seems like I make just enough, other days he needs multiple bottles. I also try to pump when possible but I don't seem to respond very well to pumping

[@kalaniblake8699]

But wanted to add that now at 4.5 months he is in the 15th percentile for weight and the 25th for height! Combination feeding seems to be working and I will try to breastfeed for a year, but I have to go back to work next week and I am afraid of what pumping instead of latching will do to my supply

[@TimeTravelMum]

Thank you for sharing this. You could have been talking about my son. Please don’t blame yourself. I did the top ups and it didn’t help (because he’d puke it up due to the allergies)

[@hdjhjhjhdfjhd]

Sending love from india...just saw your vlog on maternal depression and felt my soul is talking through your body....kudos ...its a taboo disclosing such things but you braveheart gave so much courage to alot many like me

[@rebekah3483]

I'm sorry it's been such a whirlwind and roller-coaster with bf! Sounds like you've done well keeping up with it all though and that he's doing really well now! I'm sure he'll continue on thus trend and even if he falls a bit, I know you'll do what's necessary to get it back on track! It's such a journey for each of us! Thanks for sharing!

[@kat_trabue]

Oh my gosh all of this sounds so similar to what happened with my daughter except I had to add in the formula much sooner. She had a dairy allergy as well and also I was told that while I didn't have a low supply I had an issue where I basically only produced "skim" milk and there wasn't enough fat in my milk to her going. I worked with so many doctors and LCs etc and nothing helped. We never could figure out why but they thought some combination of my health issues and possibly the meds I am on even though they are all thought to be safe for pregnancy and BFing might have affected it.

[@sarahelcombe]

I’m currently 18 weeks pregnant and am hoping to breastfeed but trying my best not to put any pressure on myself to force it if it doesn’t work. Definitely going to be getting some formula before baby arrives so that it’s in the house if we need it. Love your videos, they’re so informative and I find it really helpful especially that we’re almost the same age (I’m 25, 26 next may) I find it really hard to find U.K. mums who are the same or almost the same age as me ❤

[@zoepeters3826]

Defo buy nipple shields too, they can be the difference between success and failure and they’re not really talked about much in the UK.

[@sarahelcombe]

@@zoepeters3826 already on my list of things to get, thank you ☺️

[@MinimumViablePicnic]

Hi just wanted to say thank you for sharing your journey. I'm currently training to be a breastfeeding and even though I've breasted both my children for a long time I'm learning A LOT! I wanted to say congratulations for breastfeeding for such a long time, through so much difficulty, and for keeping going. You're giving Oryn a brilliant start in life, reducing his relative risk of developing many different conditions and building his immune system every day. I think it's wonderful to hear a story about combination feeding, a lot of people don't talk about this and many people assume it's one or the other. But every drop of breast milk is a gift for life. I think you're an amazing mum xx

[@TheKindziols]

That sounds really difficult I am so sorry :( defiantly a big of a mystery at times! As you were talking about it i would not have thought about cmpta... Especially for exclusively breastfed babies, such little amounts of diary go through to your milk... I wonder if his symptoms worsened as he started solids?

[@ewafredriksson5826]

My oldest girl had similar problems with weight. But also had stomach problems. It was lactose intolerant problem.

[@claudiajade624]

Oh Wow what a long and challenging journey! It is incredible that you persistented, and also well done for advocating for yourself and Bubba every step of the way 💜 For me bubba was a very keen latcher at the start, I really wasn't sure was doing it right and defs struggled to get comfortable from a back/shoulder perspective. She was v jaundiced tho and by about day 3 was just getting sleepier and sleepier, she stopped crying and seemed like 'a limp fish' 😥 also diaper wise we were abit concerned. She was getting too tired even to feed so started topping up with 15mL syringes of formula, either before or after latching (or both). Day 4 saw a lactaction consultant and was Game changing. My milk had just come in, she showed me a comfortable position, and also weighed bubba before and after latching, and showed she had gained 25g. And after that was pretty much all plain sailing 😊 I feel so so Lucky. Because yes those couple days where I felt like was failing at being able to feed her was just Awful. 16 months in now and still breastfeeding, been pumping at work and planning to finish that up Tomorrow 🥳 but still planning on nursing morning and evening (and overnight 🙃). For me breastfeeding was something I really wanted to do, and I'm so grateful it worked out because has been such a big and important and special part of my relationship with my daughter 💜

[@justmeek]

Also. If you have a good supply and baby is losing weight - its probably a lactose intolerant issue - which they can vecome failire to thrive really fast because lactose is made at the breast meaning you cant stop it from being in your diet and it not getting into your milk. Lactose is the sugar in the milk, where as cows milk protein is the protein in cows milk which you can eliminate from diet to contine breastfeeding but does take about 6 weeks to completely heal the gut after stopping before a complete difference.

[@charlottelake2646]

The struggling to gain weight really just hit home for me we struggled with this at the start to but later realised she had a hole in her heart which was causing the issues xx

[@milkymilkshake244]

Thank you so much for sharing this❤

[@vitaminz6993]

Bree...your hair looks beautiful 😍

[@macbump]

It’s 120% important to be VERY VERY VERY well informed, with miles of support. I read about it all through pregnancy. Also important to be determined in this sense: imagine you get on a plane and the pilot comes on the loudspeaker saying “welcome to flight 123, please buckle up and we will TRY to take off.” Wouldn’t you want to jump ship (plane) before it “tried” to take off? I sure would. Your baby is on this flight. He’s a passenger and he expects you to be feeding him breast milk. Now here’s the thing: of COURSE sometimes it doesn’t work. Absolutely 100% there are people who it doesn’t work well with. But talking like this, is the first downfall because honestly it leaves the door open for a “plane crash”. You don’t plan to have a plane crash every time you go up in the air. You do your best, 120%, and you go and fly the plane and you deal with a crash *if it happens*. I’ve got 4, and also had issues after a dummy and had to use a shield after #4. But only with him. He was the only one who was given one, against my wishes too. And I was a seasoned breast feeder who had loads of experience before him. Now I’m not saying this to incite any shame whatsoever. Only that we have to start out super informed, super determined, super supported, and with the right mindset. And most times people don’t manage to Bf as long as they want is due to a lack of one of those (support determination etc). 🥺🤷‍♀️

[@AnuschkavanDijke]

I had told my doula that I wanted to try breastfeeding and we confered about how much she would be allowed to "push" my boundaries to stick with it. I told her I wasn't game to go all out and forcing myself. However, in the end, I was the one who was pushing myself the hardest, not my doula. I encountered it all: lip tie, tongue tie, inverted nipples, premature baby, jaundice, manual pumping, electronic pumping, topping up thru feeding tube taped to my breast, domperidone. The only bullet I dodged, was a breast infection 😂. At three months old, things just fell into place and "clicked". And from that point on, breastfeeding became a breeze. Happy that I persevered. Angry with myself for putting such a demand on my wellbeing and sanity. Best thing I did for baby and myself, was to get help in the private sector, cos hospital and GP were pretty useless dead-ends. Not saying that is the same all around, but it was my personal experience (Canada)

[@zlatickoxt]

It's weird to me that no one had suggested checking for allergies earlier. Given that your son has always had enough wet nappies, it seems like a logical conclusion that he may not be digesting the milk properly... But anyway, great job dealing with this difficult situation!

[@AprilAyden]

I would have been super happy with even combi feeding my babies. Breastfeeding didn't work for all 3 of my children and its something that upsets me till this day. It's a very emotional topic!

[@laurakinsella8233]

It's a very good place to start

[@emilyjane7166]

I have 5 kids, my 4th and 5th (my 2 girls) are both cmpa. My youngest is 9 weeks and my older girl is almost 5 years old. My boys never had this issu though

[@maddiejoy6619]

My friend's son had a milk protein allergy when he was breastfeeding, but not as he got older. It's definitely possible! But, there's no shame in the allergy sticking around. Bodies are weird and allergies happen.

[@TerenaTCloud]

Can you make more community posts and polls?

[@TheKindziols]

Would you mind sharing the contact for the lactation consultant / doctor that prescribed you Domperideone? That is so rare x

[@AnuschkavanDijke]

My experience with domperidon prescription was that I could get it via a breastfeeding clinic, but not thru the lactation consultant at hospital (useless), pediatrician or my family doctor. Needed a bit of advocating to get a referral from GP to get into breastfeeding clinic, but from that point on things went quickly (tongue and lip tie snipped, domperidon, feeding tube taped to breast for top ups, etc).

[@AnuschkavanDijke]

This was in Toronto, Canada BTW, not the UK.

[@zoepeters3826]

Hate to slag off the nhs, but the lactation consultants I encountered through the nhs were nothing short of terrible. Failed to spot a tongue tie, failed to offer nipple shields even though my milk was more blood than actual milk, and let my son lose so much weight he needed to be re admitted back into hospital. I wish I’d paid private for some proper help as my only option leaving hospital was Formular milk, like it or lump it.

[@justmeek]

Which formula is he on?

[@rebeccaa2097]

Does anyone know how much breast milk to give baby?

[@Littlebluebirdie1]

Are you talking about pumped milk given in a bottle or from the breast? If it’s directly from the breast, feed on demand. If the baby squeaks you put them on the boob, you can’t over feed them. If you’re giving pumped milk you can find general guidelines online, breastmilk digests faster than formula so they might be hungry faster than if they were only on formula.

[@rebeccaa2097]

@@Littlebluebirdie1 ok so more than formula? Yes I’m pumping

[@Littlebluebirdie1]

@@rebeccaa2097 I’d go with that same guideline amounts as formula and see how your baby gets on. If they want more offer a bit more, or offer a direct feed on the breast first and then the pumped milk. A check in with a lactation consultant or a local breastfeeding group would be helpful too if you can.

[@CanisLupus1987]

One of the things I decided years ago was not to let my kids get dummys/pacifiers

[@pattyfluegel7816]

I forget, why was his birth a planned C section?

[@lauraelliott6909]

For her mental health.