My Pregnant Wife Has Been Keeping a Major Secret from Me

My Pregnant Wife Has Been Keeping a Major Secret from Me
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[@tequisaholloway1738]

He doesn't want to admit it, but he feels disgusted

[@benfranklin3638]

I was waiting for him to say that but he just couldn't get the words out....but I think besides betrayed that's what he really feels.

[@hollystiener16]

And, he was lied to and manipulated

[@SofiUk0319]

I feel horrible, he must feel terribly horrible

[@naraendrareddy273]

Who doesn't? Women(hoes) think they can keep things for themselves because deep down they know that no man would choose them as a life partner.

[@YesYesYesJeff]

Men aren't allowed to be disgusted by women...that's misogyny. 🙃🤦

[@Kali58505]

The Baby is the only reason he is still there. He would have left her by now if she wasn’t expecting… but leaving your child is a whole other misery

[@lh1514]

If it's his child...

[@archipiratta]

​@@lh1514ooh... Dayum 😢

[@cwhoff290]

​@@lh1514good point

[@V.E.R.O.]

@@lh1514 Yeah, DNA test is required.

[@Dr_Nutrition]

She knew this & trapped him

[@katiez688]

It would be one thing for her not to tell him this on a first date. But she should have told him WAY before getting to the point of marriage and pregnancy.

[@mljrotag6343]

100% this.

[@jasoncarter4343]

She knew they would not have married otherwise.

[@cooliipie]

No hymen no diamond 💎

[@bignickenergy723]

​@@cooliipie F&F gang we up!

[@andrewchristie2970]

She would’ve taken it to the grave that’s what’s so messed up

[@d.taylor3760]

Has anyone asked why she has kept photos and messages from a life "she hated, was ashamed of, and was traumatized by"?

[@hedge1417]

Was most likely forgotten files once she left that world.

[@AA-yl9so]

@@hedge1417bs she remembers

[@daniellove162]

My wife has nooooooo clue the residue of the past a cellphone keeps. When you properly back up a phone it mostly stays intact. So yea, she likely wasn’t storing it with the knowledge.

[@franziskani]

Too stupid and unorganized to delete the files ;) Likely she is pretty, but not smart or well organized - or she would have gotten and education and would have earned money in another way. And she certainly would have cleaned up her digital act. Also: I do not think he browsed the data dump of his new wife by coincidence. He did some snooping even though he did not want to admit it - which means he could have had naggig doubt already. Maybe he was jealous about former boyfriends (and she likely was evasive on that issue). Or maybe he suspected it already.

[@anglophils645]

Oh so smart Franzi, the word is disorganized, not unorganized.

[@itaintobeezy]

She didn’t tell him about it. He found out. That’s HUGE. She was never going to tell him, that’s a big red flag for me. I would leave that relationship asap

[@cloudedcolour5329]

not that simple witha kid and being married

[@definitelynotobama6851]

I’m guessing the mentality was something along the lines of, “I did something before I met him that I’m ashamed of. I hate that I did it, and it isn’t reflective of who I’ve become since I met him. So to avoid the pain of reliving my past mistakes, I’m just not going to mention it.” It was definitely a stupid move, but it’s not an uncommon one. I don’t know the specifics, but with some good couples therapy, they can still work together and grow into a great relationship. With a baby on the way, and the relationship still well within repair, I don’t think ending it out of hand is a wise move. Children deserve to be raised by loving parents.

[@startingtech3900]

They married that’s a stupid way to look at it. Like he said SHE FELL IN LOVE W THE LIFESTYLE. you don’t fall in love with the fast money if your ashamed of it

[@Sappmattnyc]

@@startingtech3900 oh he said she claimed to be "addicted" to the lifestyle. That's even worse. You can fall out of love with something but addicts can have relapses.

[@itaintobeezy]

@@cloudedcolour5329 you are right. That’s a tough situation for sure

[@David-wo9un]

He described the marriage as not the best and “rocky” after only being married a couple months? Sounds like he never should have tied the knot.

[@jamiestar3376]

Divorced rate is 60 percent why on earth would tie knot at all..

[@cloudedcolour5329]

@@jamiestar3376 he shouldn't have knocked her up after probably dating 2-3 months

[@darkangel686868]

Should have got a vasectomy, he would have never been trapped by a lying woman he barely knows!

[@laurao8099]

I noticed that too.

[@nikan7704]

Ask any married couple, the 1st year of marriage is usually the hardest. You're getting used to being together all the time and living together, making life decisions, etc. So many things to work through. So him saying it's been rocky could be more than that or it could be just the normal getting used to each other process. Especially since they've only known each other for a year.

[@CowboyOdie]

I was in a similar situation. I couldn’t eat or sleep. In three weeks I lost 40 pounds and an inch off my hairline. I tried everything to make it work (counseling, hypnotherapy, marriage retreats). Everyone - and I mean everyone - told me I was the a-hole bc it was her past. I knew leaving would not make the pain go away, but I had to do it for my sanity.

[@christophernuckolls9964]

You made the right call. You're not the a-hole. She is.

[@CowboyOdie]

@@christophernuckolls9964 Thanks man. It’s good to hear that after years of hearing the exact opposite.

[@dj_krome]

I honestly hope you’re doing well man that sounds terrible

[@pirjettabesil6669]

the past does matter because it shapes us . Anyone who shamed you was wrong because it was not their life and I am quite sure they would not be as understanding in same situation except if they were also carrying similar pasts ...likely birds of feather flock together...

[@truthseekerjesusfollower6393]

What was her past about?

[@norse_cat]

He sounds like he was close to crying at the beginning. Poor guy 😢

[@jilogarcia5979]

"She hated it" to "She got addicted to the lifestyle". Wow the mental gymnastics on this one.

[@snoozyq9576]

Is it that hard to understand that people can do things they hate. Makes sense to me.

[@davidtrak2679]

exactly

[@willylumpnj]

@@snoozyq9576 Yeah, it the money is good LOL

[@angrysloth]

addicts, famous for loving their addiction. *eyeroll*

[@RYANLEWIS-pd7zs]

Just "gymnastics" on her part.

[@dulceaidavp9716]

I can see a lot of these type of cases coming up in the near future due to platforms like only fans, having sugar daddies, and escorting.

[@castiel4746]

Men will have to start to do their Due Dilligence before getting into this messy situations. Body count and past matters.

[@divinemessenger2030]

Onlyfans and escorting are two different things.

[@divinemessenger2030]

@@castiel4746You sound really immature. As long as they’re free of STD’s the past is the past. Why do you care about that? Stop being sexist.

[@castiel4746]

@@divinemessenger2030 if you want a hoe it is up to you... dont put your preferences on me... studies back that past matters but well then people wonder why divorce rate is soo high.

[@FirstLast-xk6fd]

@@divinemessenger2030 No, they are both selling their body to make money.

[@gregorycarlson6632]

As a professional I’ve been dealing with relationship difficulties for over 40 years. The problem here is the same as affairs; she had to be caught. The lesson to be learned here is DON’T KEEP SECRETS!! She should have been up front with him before things began to get serious. That way he could have decided then and there if he could live with the situation. Trust is lost when people get caught with regard to big secrets.

[@mljrotag6343]

Exactly.

[@jenniferfowler682]

she wasn't with him when she did this - it has no bearing on their relationship now!!! No one has to divulge every sexual encounter they had with a partner. Puritanical culture is so obnoxious

[@mljrotag6343]

​@jenniferfowler682 To him, it matters. To you and others, it may not. Zero problems with that. Everyone decides what's important and right for them. Just be honest and find someone who is a better match. It's pretty simple, really.

[@jenniferfowler682]

@@mljrotag6343 it only matters because he went digging thru her personal files and found something from her past that he finds difficult to swallow. When you go digging you show your level of discomfort with yourself and your choices. We need to remember we are autonomous human beings and are allowed to have some things that are private. Had she been with 15 dudes before but not been paid, should she have to tell him about every sexual encounter?

[@joev7014]

He should’ve not busted nuts inside her… now she’s pregnant. That’s the lesson to learn here

[@bige2268]

Never start a relationship off on a lie. 👏👏👏

[@show_me_your_kitties]

Amen.

[@LSSYLondon]

Everyone dating would laugh at that. The history of the world runs on lies. lol

[@jenniferfowler682]

never start a relationship by snooping thru your partners devices!

[@pinkkfloydd]

@@jenniferfowler682 Women and accountability mixing like water and oil.

[@pinkkfloydd]

@@LSSYLondon Uh, for you and other shitty people perhaps.

[@mw6346]

Been together about a year and she is 25 weeks pregnant. Dude got himself into this mess.

[@joywebster2678]

What's she going to work at while raising kids? What work skills did he THINK she brought to the coupleship?

[@MillionDollarDream]

@@joywebster2678semenslurpin

[@nyteowl8069]

and married! My god thats so fast.

[@Oorlogshond]

Probably not his kid

[@wLBlue]

The jezabel spirit is strong in these women.

[@SystemsForJustin]

Staying or leaving, both have consequences. Whatever he decides I’m praying for him and the baby.

[@LIVEINPEACE2023]

And for her.

[@dewilew2137]

But not for the wife? 🙄

[@crispyasfuck2856]

@@dewilew2137 Hell na

[@lilykhandker4126]

@@dewilew2137 No. Only the husbsnd and baby are innocent

[@BornR3STLESS]

@@lilykhandker4126 "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick."

[@shawnpenny2738]

She found a nerdy, nice guy, who she thought would just be grateful to be with a beautiful woman. He thought he had hit the jackpot and this guy would never leave her even if he found out about her past.

[@magdam8290]

Projecting much?

[@shawnpenny2738]

@@magdam8290 Nope. Saw plenty of it back in my late 20’s at church. All the born again virgins who were complete party girls in high school or college sitting in the pew with a clueless nice guy. The terrified look they used to get when they saw me and thought I might tell their victim was priceless.

[@magdam8290]

@@shawnpenny2738 you assume too much of things that are unknown. A caller is a nice guy? A caller is a nerd? A woman was a party girl? A woman is beautiful? You will be suprised by a number of not conventionally attractive, inteovert women that happened to work as escorts in some point of their lives. Not to mention the assumption that a guy must be a shy nerd, cause he married her so fast. He might be an opposite

[@shawnpenny2738]

@@magdam8290 I didn’t assume anything. I had seen some of these girls getting trains run on them at parties. I knew lots of guys that had slept with them. I had turned down a couple of them because this was during the time of AIDS and I wasn’t going to take a chance getting that. There were no assumptions made. I also knew a couple of the guys I saw these girls in church with. They were clueless.

[@ViewinDrew]

💯

[@larak4144]

I hope he gets a paternity confirmation when the baby arrives.

[@bolotabr12]

Exactly

[@ericjennings6267]

Delony never even mentions it to the guy he absolutely should because there is only a certain window of time after the baby is born i think in California it is 2 years then then guy is locked in to support that child even if its not his in the event of a divorce

[@jackdeniston59]

@@ericjennings6267 This Delony guy hates Men.

[@stephengallagher2209]

Delony is a real POS... he doesn't care about the men, or the women... he cares about selling crappy books to women.

[@cooliipie]

No hymen no diamond 💎

[@domwings4329]

This show continues to be the classy version of Jerry Springer haha

[@emilylednicky6718]

Bro 😂 exactly why I'm watching

[@arfriedman4577]

He reminds me of Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

[@activistgranny2.066]

I am here for all of it.

[@TV-vl4fe]

😂😂😂😂

[@aprilwashington3150]

😂😂😂

[@truthseeker6370]

He found it out- she Never told him. He was most likely impressed with her beauty and how super sexy she was. People need to spend more time together before getting married.

[@caitlinhunsuck9099]

Yep, my thoughts exactly. He got what he deserved.

[@chengetaimachaka]

People can be very deceptive. What you said may have not been the case. People are good liars out there. No one deserves this.

[@TheAgentmigs]

Oh for sure. She's probably a dime piece. Married after only a year too?!

[@sakurisake4201]

Yes just falling in love for all the looks externally. Getting engaged after a year is moving too quick and getting knocked up in six months post marriage. How do you even know her that well? What is wrong with taking the time?

[@snoozyq9576]

Or he liked her for other reasons. Shallow much.

[@georgecarpenter8738]

That is an intimidating past and can ruin current intimacy

[@gladysover5368]

He needs to bail...and to get a paternity test on the kid. There ain't no fixing this. "Addicted to the lifestyle"??? She will go back. Run Dude Run

[@carrisa5056]

My only suggestion having gone through something very similar is to go to marriage counseling because the quicker you get help for what you are going through the quicker you can either stay or go don’t waste your time

[@landonlowe4029]

To be fair He got married to her within a year lol no way you know that much about the average person.. I’m not sure she would tell you that much about herself in a year

[@100americanmade]

That is right. People should take time to get to know someone AND their family before they pop the question. Today, people start sleeping together right off and then make crucial decisions later. Maybe he knew but wanted to pretend otherwise. How can you date someone a year and not know what they do for a living??

[@landonlowe4029]

@@100americanmade right lol my parents actually got engaged after 3 months of dating but they knew each other since elementary school -my dad knew my moms parents from then too and then met back up like years later 🤣

[@landonlowe4029]

But yeah on average not the case at all

[@SheilaNorthcutt]

Once you become engaged, that should have been something she should have mentioned.

[@mw6346]

And she is six month pregnant. So she was knocked up within six months of them meeting.

[@saraliburd7752]

Honestly the trust is gone-he will forever not trust her -the relationship is over

[@chrissy334]

It was YEARS before he met her though……. They didn’t even know each other. Why should she air herself out if she decided to maybe go to therapy and change her life. People sleep around all through college for free.

[@davidw.5185]

He was defrauded. Omitting this sort of thing is pure fraud. He should immediately get a paternity test! And an STD screening.... Man, I thought my ex wife fraud story was bad, but this is insane. 😢

[@wLBlue]

Aren't the majority all frauds...once kids show up or they say I do?

[@ryans6186]

@@wLBlueno, definitely not 😂

[@brandonmartin8270]

Seriously though!

[@SapphoArimateea]

What's your story?

[@MichaelJones-rn2pq]

@@wLBlue No. But they say that all is yellow to the jaundiced eye. That means frauds and fraudsters see that in everybody and everything. Is that what you see?

[@razmiddle9410]

What's really concerning is that she didn't tell him, he found out about it by (maybe unintentionally) snooping. So she was intending on marrying him and raising a child without being honest about her past.

[@MsDorcelus]

Yeah, that’s the part that really got me. She didn’t come clean to him about her past. He had to find out about it. 😔

[@startingtech3900]

They merged hard drives it was on his computer and he started looking an honest wife wouldn’t have anything to hide

[@johniii8147]

@@startingtech3900 Why would you merge computers anyway? Sounds rather controlling. It almost seems as if he was looking for something. Merging computers is never something i've done with my spouse either before or after marriage.

[@TB-rx1ue]

@@johniii8147 agreed. I respect my husbands privacy. I don’t snoop on his phone, email or computer. That’s personal regardless if you’re married or not. He’s violating her privacy by doing so and found out more than he could chew. I snooped on his past social media activity just to know what I’m getting into before we got married. Saw some cute exes and figured I commend his taste 🤣 Shut that book close. If you can’t trust your spouse you have no business marrying them.

[@Jane5720]

I don't know if I think I would have told him either

[@stonerbob8097]

That’s why vetting the person you’re gonna be married to is such an important step.

[@shalalala868]

True but there are ppl who had no idea their wife or husband was a serial killer or capable of murder. Nothing is fool-proof and this is something that's easier to hide.

[@redhotbillypeppers]

$5 says they are no longer together but if they still are, he is one miserabley disgusted man.

[@alexcajiao7489]

$5 HaHa!!!

[@gossipandgrigio7200]

I don’t understand that logic. Or lack there of. It was before they met I’m sure he didn’t tell her everything he’s ever done in his past. People need to be realistic and get off their high horse

[@michaelmoran2125]

​@gossipandgrigio7200 she made a joke of her life. Then she lived it, deception got her where she is now. I've been in the game and even that looks better than this.

[@gossipandgrigio7200]

@@michaelmoran2125 been in the game? What are you talking about

[@sillkthashocker]

Don't have a baby after 6 months of dating, how about that

[@keltongreen5455]

Pray for this guy. Now knowing she was a escort it's his perception of her that has change. They could get along really well but the whole situation causes internal conflict.

[@joyaustin6581]

He benefits from her acquired skill and she’s not charging him. I say get over it. Would he feel better if she had done it for free? If they are both healthy who cares how many people a partner has been with. He might have gotten around more than her but for free.

[@ryanmedlar6217]

@@joyaustin6581 Agreed, especially think it would work in his situation since the gentlemen has an array of feminine qualities. Most of the time, men don't wed hoes.

[@CarlGorn]

@@joyaustin6581 It's nowhere near that simple. There's a ton of research showing an inverse relationship between how many partners you've had and how well you can emotionally bond/sustain a long-term relationship. And being a professional girl like that can make it worse, because hardening your heart becomes second nature out of necessity. And all that is on top of the insecurities this brings out in him. That's the kind of mess that needs a good counselor once a week.

[@MMyers-mh4jq]

This could happen due to childhood issue too!!! I have this issue due to my dad not being there ALOT!

[@greenAbbot]

@@CarlGorn I’d love to hear any references for that research.

[@deanalbertson7203]

Either stay with her, or leave her. Make your decision, move on, and be happy.

[@laurao8099]

Sounds like he did

[@hikerhobby1204]

Amen Dean! People spend years of what could be happy because they refuse to make a decision.

[@nancydavieau]

Maybe he wants to find out if the child is actually his (biologically)

[@deanalbertson7203]

@@nancydavieau That would be a good idea.

[@puclopuclik4108]

@@nancydavieau you wil be surprised but ex prostitutes are actually more faithful wifes than other women. They already had enough.

[@PoppaBoogaloo]

Never overlook the fact that she didn't come to him in the spirit of honesty to confess her past, even after they exchanged vows on their wedding day and conceived a child. She only told him the truth after he already found out and confronted her. She was going to live with that lie as long as she could simp!y because it was easier. Now the HUSBAND has to reconcile and change his perspective to make it work. Why should he be "All-In" when she obviously wasn't?

[@pettybetty1791]

Why do you believe your entitled to knowing every last thing about your partner's past before you started dating them?

[@blacksquid270]

​@@pettybetty1791 If it's just casual dating then knowing somebody's past isn't necessary. But when it comes to considering something as legally massive as marriage, a person has the right to know everything. You can't just expect someone to make a massive commitment to you with limited information. That's like handing the bank your most recent paycheck stub saying "that should be enough of my financial history for you to give me this 750k loan" .

[@pettybetty1791]

@@blacksquid270 If years of dating this individual and witnessing their character firsthand isn't enough for you to feel comfortable marrying them, then you probably shouldn't be getting married. Their past shouldn't trump your real life personal experience with them.

[@pettybetty1791]

@@blacksquid270 I'm sorry but no one has the "right" to know every last little thing about you. Personal privacy is to be respected in or out of a relationship

[@blacksquid270]

@@pettybetty1791 People often put on a mask when trying to get something out of someone. In the case of desiring marriage, a person might not truly reveal themselves so as not to derail that goal. It's often only after someone discovers their spouse cheating, they come to the very stark realization that they never actually knew their wife/husband.

[@nathanpaulino422]

Three years back I dated a girl who i had strong feelings towards. After about 6 months, we were at dinner and she just randomly told me about her past. That she had sleep with 100 guys and didn’t care what their name was or what they did she went home with them. I was devastated, I felt so jealous of all the others before me. Their lack of effort was rewarded with what I wanted. I was trying really hard to win her but just to think of all the others she embraced. I couldn’t do it. The image I had of her in my head was destroyed. That sucked the most

[@Musicienne-DAB1995]

Yuck. I'm a woman, and if a man told me that he'd slept with 100 women, I'm out of there. Contrary to what our society says, that is *not* normal and it is *not* desirable.

[@wendyannhall]

So, when was she supposed to tell you, then? Is she just worthless to you because she has a past? Why do you think she waited until she felt safe with you to tell you about it? It's because the ego can't handle thinking about it. That's it. Doesn't change who she is now, doesn't change how she treats you. It's honestly sad to me that you gave up because of something that truly didn't affect the present nor the future. And you didn't even stick around to ask why. Hypersexuality is generally a result of sexual trauma, and not the fault of the victim. We are human, a living breathing combination of experiences, good and bad. Food for thought.

[@csx6910]

@@wendyannhall You're a product of your past. Did she change because she wanted to? Or because she was getting older and saw the writing on the wall and realized she couldn't play the 'game' forever? Women foolishly think their past shouldn't matter no matter how fucked up it makes them or how others might feel about it. OP is right that he shouldn't like the fact that more was expected of him than all the others than came(LITERALLY) before him. She gave herself away like candy on a Halloween night not caring that men value a woman's sexuality, seemingly, far more than that woman herself. I have a coworker in a relationship with a guy who wants to have a child with her but she won't unless he marries her. The kicker? She already has TWO kids from another guy who didn't have to jump through any hoops AND this new guy already treats these kids like his own. But she still wants to hold him to a higher standard. It is utterly auti$tic for anyone to think that's rational and right.

[@wendyannhall]

@@csx6910 It sounds like growth, to me. She didn't value herself before, clearly had incredibly low self esteem, and now has learned and grown and wants better for herself and for her children. Oftentimes the lesson was learned from the abuse received from the men that came before the current man. I do see your perspective, but it's entirely too black and white to me. On the flip side, have you laid out every transgression from your past to every single human you've ever been intimate with? The issue is the double standard. I agree that in OP's situation, not knowing until later felt like they were lied to. But if the woman has been rejected over and over and over when being honest about her past, it probably took her a while to open up about it; she wanted to feel safe, first. And when she finally got the courage, he dropped her like it was hot. But men can brag about their conquests and sleep with hundreds of women, and nobody bats an eye. Women are not property. We live out lives, just like men do. Sometimes those lives are sad and messy before we learn and grow. I'm not replying to argue with you; just to give a different perspective.

[@Musicienne-DAB1995]

@@wendyannhall I will agree with you that there's clearly something mentally wrong with someone who engages in such shocking promiscuity. That cause may have been trauma, but it may also have been a cultural breakdown of stigma about promiscuity that has seen many act as if such chronic meaningless sex is normal, when it's not. But neither of those reasons obligate OP to stick around. You may dismiss this as "ego", but that news has a devastating effect on someone's sex life. That kind of past does affect the present and the future. (Not to mention the health risk of such promiscuity, which could also affect the present.) Nobody should feel obligated to stay with someone whose past makes them deeply uncomfortable.

[@cutehumor]

JUST THINK, what if he never checked her old computer!?!? HE would never found out!!

[@ejbatu]

Right, but old habits die hard so after a few years, she would go back tricking or at least cheat on him. Over 80% of divorces are initiated by women and of that 80%, over 95% of the women were promiscuous women, so they are already starting out rocky and based on her background, the likelihood of this marriage surviving is very low. To stay together, take Dr. advance, they have to be intentional to work on the relationship and get therapy.

[@forreal1014]

Shame on her for dishonesty. She trapped him

[@nitareed4088]

That is what I've been waiting for...

[@skincareceo]

Exactly

[@lok777]

No one would marry a broken ex-whore otherwise.

[@heatherwood6446]

I feel that she might have manufactured getting pregnant SO THAT he would be compelled to marry her (dated only 1 year before marriage, was pregnant 13 weeks before marriage "24 weeks pregnant," married only a couple months when he found out this info)...either because she didn't feel worthy of her own accord & needed the baby to secure her relationship, was scared her past would come out & scare him away, or she was purposely lying as a means to an end, because she wanted him. No matter which, intense marriage counseling is urgent PRIOR to baby coming! They have 15 weekly sessions to get to a point where they can at least be a team again for their child, BEFORE their child comes! Then counseling as able... 🫣

[@konstantinospetrakis2418]

Married for a couple of months. Already pregnant. So she essentially got dicked by the entire country then she found a victim. And the dude can't leave because he has to pay the hooker child support as well. What a wonderful thing eh ? Women have it hard in this life.

[@zangadaa]

For me it's not so simple: she wanted to move on and probably forgetting forever what happened and she just wanted a normal life... When you know that your past could destroy your future you won't be so adamant about sharing everything 😮

[@816928]

A woman no longer qualifies for a normal life after willingly choosing sex work. She can only qualify for a simp.

[@donnellehall6093]

yes!!!

[@tikka300wsm5]

You mean actions have consequences? Even the change in name is hilarious. Trying to soften the blow by calling them an escort instead of a prostitute.

[@cabudagavin3896]

It wasn't her choice to lock a man into a deal that we wouldn't take if he knew

[@jkim1241]

The lack of accountability is wild. You women will feel the pain when you have a son that gets lied to and marries a prostitute without knowing and she ruins his life.

[@lauriedonnelly7134]

You are amazing!!! Keep doing what you’re doing! God bless you!

[@carlik3974]

He doesn’t really sound like he loves her. He talks more about his duty rather then him loving her. I wonder if it was a shotgun wedding

[@joywebster2678]

Or a baby trap. Find a moral guy to get pregnant with to lift you out of your bad choices.

[@fasiistyrer]

I would stop loving my wife if i found out that about her. It's that simple. I would feel disgust everytime i looked at her.

[@natef1504]

Run dude. Run as fast as you can. Make sure to get a paternity test.

[@Sappmattnyc]

And don't sign the birth certificate until the DNA test results come back.

[@sternshadowdude2]

@@Sappmattnyc too late for that. He's married to her. In the state's eyes, he's the father.

[@teresaevans4840]

​@@sternshadowdude2 correct

[@traceyleeherrera5247]

this is a very delicate situation😬 the husband did put this out there but i can't believe how judgemental the comments are😒 i hope they worked out, can't everyone wish the best for others? they were expecting an innocent little baby

[@BlueDauntless]

I think it’s a mixed bag if they do work out or not.

[@Tallguyify]

You seem like someone with a lot of compassion, admirable. However, the comments offer judgement because we want to reflect our genuine opinions and reactions to this situation. It's important for the public to receive honest feedback about how sex work is perceived by men, and what the likely consequences are, especially when it's coupled with deception. The reason I cant genuinely hope they work out is because it's so unjust to the husband, and he will be saddling the lions share of pain over the whole thing. Ridicule and silent judgement from his friends and family, if he can even tell them, mental movies that come unbidden of the wife's prostitution activities, feeling dirty and used, loss of trust, loss of the person he thought she was, guilt over not being able to get over it as he feels the need to protect her, and on and on and on. He doesn't deserve this happening, and she doesnt deserve him after robbing him of the agency to make an informed choice about whether he wanted his offspring to have a prostitute for a mother. The best hopes I can offer are for the flourishing of the baby, who is truly innocent in all of this.

[@17topaz]

Love your show and you always give great advice

[@jayman3575]

i know someone that didn't find out until his kid was 12 years old that he wasn't the "biological" father....it didn't change his relationship with the kid but totally with her....

[@DaddyStarbuck]

He should leave

[@hikerhobby1204]

Good man! Love that he continued with his child.

[@puclopuclik4108]

There is differences in two stories. Your friend's wife cheated on him and lied about the child's father. The wife of the guy on the phone didn't cheated on him. She didn't declare what she did before. That's past. I doubt he told her his full history.

[@humansvd3269]

@@puclopuclik4108 Bro, a woman who is capable of sleeping with strangers for money is not a wife.

[@puclopuclik4108]

@@humansvd3269 you have simple deliberation. I guarantee you everyone is capable of sex for money, just depends on circumstances. I doubt you would say the same about men.

[@madeleinegooi]

Sorry to hear this, really heartache for the marriage if it's not build on honesty & having dark secrets.

[@rageburst]

The questions I'd have next is: is this my baby? Did she have the baby as a way to secure the relationship? The trust issues pretty much ruins the relationship and it might gnaw at you forever. Also, is she using you for resources if she got "addicted" to that lifestyle? Is her ability to love hampered by having so many sexual relationships? Would you have kept it a secret from her if the situation was reversed?

[@philipbrazis8732]

Ruth here, the question does not apply here, if the situation was reversed, nope, no nada,

[@paulrodriguez8852]

It doesn't sound like that's the case.

[@blacksquid270]

Wouldn't be surprised if she'd gotten pregnant by a client, found this nice guy who's probably not used to attention from beautiful women, love bombed him and got him to fall heads over heels, and he's none the wiser to the sick game.

[@rageburst]

@@philipbrazis8732 You'd have to assume you're a woman capable of giving birth in this case, and that she was your male partner. If we forget gender and just consider the human level, you'd have to lie and be forced maintain that lie since that kid will be with you for life. That becomes pathological lying, and that would likely devastate the other person.

[@paulrodriguez8852]

@@blacksquid270 It doesn't sound like it? She was doing it like a lot of young women do just for the money. A lot of women look at casual sex as no big deal? What bothers me more is the amount of young women who have slept with over close or over a hundred partners? Now if you find that out? Get rid of her right away.🤥

[@jimquinn2431]

Thoughtful insight and advice. People are messy.

[@el676]

It’s less concerning about her past life and more concerning that she kept it from him. We all have skeletons in our closet; nothing in hers is that insane. But lying about it is worse especially when you have a baby with someone. Sucks

[@whitneyw.7919]

No, her past life is pretty concerning. Having experience w/ this "industry",the stuff you see, the experiences you have, and the psychological traits you have to already have to enter the "industry" and you build while in are not benign whatsoever. Unless she has had SERIOUS therapy and SERIOUS personal work, her past is really concerning and a man should not get involved. It's not just the lying, it's problematic. And in the back of her head, she's likely thinking that if it doesn't work out w/the caller she could go back to escorting, especially if the bills start piling up

[@supermodelatlanta1354]

So how would u say. Hey love I use to F for gucci bags?

[@el676]

@@whitneyw.7919 I didn’t look at it that way, interesting..

[@johnsmith-kt7ef]

@@whitneyw.7919 agreed being an escort isnt a "normal" thing. Typically their are issues in the persons character and personality. While these may not be major issues to go through life and they may be a great person, it is an issue if you are looking for a potentially traditional style marriage with kids, and your partner has no idea you did this.

[@Mrs.TJTaylor]

@@whitneyw.7919 What? Being a prostitute who likes the lifestyle isn’t “that insane”? Wow.

[@bonnierobbins4230]

I can relate ! I must call about my issue now that I heard this mans story!

[@Oorlogshond]

Bad advice. Run do not walk to divorce her. She doesn’t respect you and stole your ability to choose the mate you want.

[@queenofmyownuniverse2339]

Poor man. I hope he is able to overcome this hurdle and he and his wife can move forward with a healthy relationship going forward 🙏

[@Al3xRodriguez]

I felt his pain. When he said how he feels. Wow.

[@cooliipie]

No hymen no diamond 💎

[@mattphillips1910]

And he got there.....at 10 minutes in! Good for him, for being willing to talk about it.

[@cbyt8759]

The punch metaphor was on point

[@mrscf8865]

Wow! she didnt even tell him. What else isn't she telling him? She deliberately did this to get the good guy.

[@LaniLanilei]

You don't know this. You would have to be a mind reader to know her thoughts.

[@Halgame99]

She trapped him with that quick baby delivery and their scam marriage! Yikes just the thought of your wife being that is just very gross

[@richsanossian8675]

Run, Forest, Run

[@FrankMontano]

Thank you for inspiring us to work harder at becoming a better version of who we are.

[@charlesbateh]

I enjoy Dr. Delony because he is a very good listener. I'm uninterested in the caller's, the questions Dr. asks accompanied with his approach and respect given to everyone is wonderful. I pay attention to that to better myself in all facets of my life. Thank you, Dr.-- great job.

[@e.mo.4194]

I would be livid, I would be paranoid thinking I could have gotten a permanent STD.

[@sandyj3945]

She put his life in Danger with all these STDs and HIV/Aids...I would be devastated!!!!! Sick to my stomach and leave the relationship regardless...I know my worth! Now he has to be tested more! Smh

[@konjurekatrina]

Sex workers aren’t out spreading diseases. If fact there hasn’t been a case of a man contracting HIV from a biological female sex worker, outside of porn. But soooo many of my millennial friends have caught STDs because they have an extremely casual relationship with condom usage. I’ve worked at Planned Parenthood and the people coming in with STDs weren’t sex workers.

[@stellarocquie7957]

Very emotionally articulate caller.

[@ambertorres4444]

I would feel SO DISRESPECTED.

[@UpChuckTheBoogie]

The biggest thing im thankful for is that both of my children look like me

[@amandadean3948]

He doesn’t want to say it but he’s also wondering if the baby is really his because he’s questioning her morals and if he can really trust her. I feel for this guy, he really sounds shaken up.

[@santi60294]

It bothers that we dont know if he knows if its his child ??perhaps that was his biggest issue .If the baby was another breach of trust

[@kengy1991]

Good point. He might consider asking for a paternity test considering he didn't say when she allegedly stopped.

[@Daniellapalo]

I can’t believe she didn’t tell him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@ddavis8988]

You really need to vet the person who you are marrying. 1 year is not enough even for the best vetters. The average person is terrible at it.

[@Musicienne-DAB1995]

Vetting is key.

[@AllThingsSoul]

Great advice, Dr. Delony!

[@beingfullyme]

Exactly how I feel. We all make bad choices until we don’t

[@salliekim2727]

I am a woman who understands why she was so ashamed to ever bring it up. If she brought it up from the start , many men would walk away. Not all…but many. It’s best to be forthcoming in your relationship rather than to find out by accident because some trust is lost. You can get it back but it takes time. I know because my husband did the same to me. He wasn’t a sex worker but he’s made horrible super shady past life choices. I’m still learning but I do want to be with him.

[@letsgetit90]

I feel like most men would walk away because there is a reason why folks Don't want to marry or date sex workers. But at the same time, the things we did in the past will and still haunt us. Some can be forgotten, but others won't, even if it was the past. She wasn't even going to tell him all; it was by chance that he found her hard drive. I can't fathom the horror and pain he felt when he saw what was in the industry. He didn't lose a bit of trust; he lost all of it! Keeping it real, she sold her body for money. For all of the men, they wouldn't want to know that the love of his life was having sex with a bunch of random men and doing other things 😢. I can only speak for myself. If this happened to me, I would lose all my love and trust in her, and if I didn't have a kid on the way, I would probably divorce her. suppose she had told me this information during our dating phase. Then I could have ended it or accepted her past and continued our journey. Just having this information before I commit to you is very important for me, and I think most people are looking to move on to the next step with their love. But now he has a kid, even if he wanted to leave, he probably won't. Sadly, there are people who are ashamed of their past, so they will purposely throw their dig when they are x in their marriage, relationship, and even when they have kids. Like you were saying you are learning to accept it. For the caller said he is going to have to watch his tongue when they get into arguments. Then if other people find out about her past... That is going to put pressure on him. I would love to see an update on their situation.

[@konstantinospetrakis2418]

That's why she got pregnant first. So she was set for life. Victim entrapped, doesn't matter if he leaves or not, still gotta pay.

[@svetikchum6988]

Then dont be a h o e

[@supernova11711]

The problem is that things like this just make you look at them differently. It’s not something you choose, it just happens. You can never get that back. You not only lose trust but also the person you thought you loved. They aren’t who you thought they were. Even if you can learn to love the person they actually are…building the trust back up is a completely different thing. Some can and some can’t. The fact that she married him and got pregnant all the while knowing she was blatantly lying to him…that’s terrible. You don’t even have the right to treat people that way.

[@leahflower9924]

I think body count isn't the issue I think when people sell themselves it's more of an issue if it was about survival then ok but you should disclose it at least to an extent

[@RustyShackleford051]

Homie got all the way baby trapped

[@loriluv127]

Yea...if she didn't get pregnant he would have been out the door. Scary stuff

[@Melcatsite]

Should've ran a background check or hired a private investigator to vet her.

[@GardenerEarthGuy]

You can't turn a rake into a sprinkler.... Poor guy.

[@StratRider]

I have to say that my wife and I both agree that things we did before we met - just don't count. You can't change the past and only what we do or have done since we met, matters.

[@siddheshmirjankar910]

It's not about changing the past. Everyone has the choice to live whatever life they want, however, by not disclosing every detail of their life with their fiancé, they are taking away his/her choice to go through with the wedding or not. No one should be burdened with someone's past unless they themselves volunteer.

[@eurekahope5310]

Had she disclosed this prior to marriage, I totally agree. Instead, she spent their whole relationship lying to him. I hope it works out, but without work, intimacy will likely remain transactional.

[@joesillamanrs7189]

It’s a tough thing to do, but this is probably the best way to live

[@sitka49]

What if you found out they were a hired killer or a child molester or something like that wouldn't that matter?

[@StratRider]

@@sitka49 There are some things that I can accept and some things that I can not. And, finding out now puts that in the NOW, not in the past, so I would deal with it now and not with the outlook that someone has lied to me for however many years. How people actually treat you NOW is all that really matters. Many don't know that Al Capone was considered to be quite an awesome father.

[@eecneihappy]

11:47 Love Dr. John's info, insight & calling out truth & feelings. Caller - Good news, Bottom line - is she chose you!

[@Cardinal15]

What else is she hiding. I would never be able to trust again.

[@Candace-M-]

Man... That's rough 😞 it is going to take a whiiiile for him to heal from this, but it can happen.

[@pacificojorge5421]

Unfortunately I would leave her, there is no way I can be with her and torture myself every day with thoughts, it would hurt me more in the long run and create great insecurity in me.

[@chocolatte8301]

The sad thing is, if he never stumbled upon those files he would have never known... She likely was never going to tell him

[@eurekahope5310]

I have a feeling that the repercussions of her previous lifestyle would have brought problems even if he never understood the root cause. She probably has a low view of herself, men, and physical intimacy. Having traded favors for money and quickly locked in a marriage, she likely sees intimacy as transactional. Research indicates that more past partners tends to decrease marital satisfaction and increase divorce rates. Even if all my theories are false, having to block out a part of her history for years would likely take a toll. Most serious couples discuss their intimate pasts, if only vaguely. I doubt she admitted to the number of partners she has had. The work to lie about and hide her past would likely prevent depth in emotional intimacy.

[@chocolatte8301]

@@eurekahope5310 I agree, 100%

[@paulrodriguez8852]

Well of course not? She knew he would be upset about it.

[@rebeccaanne8546]

He is only purely lucky that there isn't written record of every sin he has committed as well. We would all be looking at this differently if we had that info.

[@dewilew2137]

And he would have been just fine not knowing. What difference does it make? Y’all are acting like this somehow changes who she is fundamentally.

[@davidlawson4281]

Take away..”there is no fruit in detail mining”. What a great advice.

[@ifthaker2277]

Love u Dr John. U saved my marriage ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@truckingwithtobee]

Great job Dr. D!!!

[@Robotron5000Deluxe]

Definitely get a DNA test.

[@Musicienne-DAB1995]

And an STD test wouldn't hurt, either.

[@user-yk9sk7pg6v]

I like your channel John - thank you

[@araydog]

Yikes, man I feel his pain

[@nikkole9951]

If someone can hide something like this what else are they hiding? We can forgive but it’s really hard to forget. This is going to haunt their marriage for years to come. I feel really bad for him. I mean, how can he ever trust her? I think first thing he needs to do is get an STD test and a DNA test to find out if the baby is actually his. I feel bad a child is being brought into this mess and will most likely be raised up in a toxic environment.

[@jamiestar3376]

Can't go out door because half of town had her..

[@crzyruskie86]

It will only be toxic if she raises the kid. He needs to have majority custody. What if she has disgruntled or violent past clients that find out where she lives or recognizes her when she's out? Her past has lots of seedy people.

[@energeticsoulhealer888]

Probably a few at their wedding.

[@shelbysycamore637]

​@@crzyruskie86 you could make the same argument about a parent who has worked as a cop or a lawyer. I don't see why he should take full custody of the child because she used to be an escort.

[@jordanl4805]

JUST LEAVE ALREADY. Don't do this to yourself. Accept that the life you wanted doesn't exist. Accept that the life you had did not exist and was just a lie. Move on and find someone you can be happy with, even as a divorce.

[@el676]

Sucks cause he has a child now. Just have a conversation with her about it. If she’s done with that life, owns her shortcomings, reassures you that she loves you, and apologizes for lying - consider working through. If not, leave

[@MrMlbfan6]

@@el676 Na leave . If she lie about that imagine what else she has lie about

[@motheryuba57]

But there's a baby. I would do a DNA test to find out if it's his. Ugh. When someone lies about something as big as she did then how many other lies has she told and how many more lies will she tell in the future. It's doomed unless they both agree to put all of the truth on the table and start over on 100% openness and honesty. What a painful way to start a marriage and family life. All could have been avoided if she had been fully honest once they became serious.

[@brendaadams7783]

Very impressed as a Christian how you responded to this man!!

[@jjminor]

Wait a second. At the very beginning, does he say hi Dr. Looney ?? 😂

[@lindacondilli6494]

Why does he have to do all the work?? She’s the one that wasn’t honest.

[@richardv9648]

This is a beta channel...lol

[@CrystalM1917]

It's gonna take a lot of work for him to stay honestly....if he wants to stay that is. And I don't blame him for leaving if he chooses....

[@BlueDauntless]

So true. She should have done a lot of work before even getting into a serious situation. But it doesn’t sound like she did. He can work to forgive and build trust. But she needs to work on herself and her baggage. But also, she’s not on the call. Maybe John didn’t feel comfortable offering her advice. (Though, he should have.)

[@karengodfrey290]

Agree 100% this is why i don’t think it will work out

[@mrshappywife8468]

I'm sorry but a marriage built on lies and obligations is not a real marriage. She should have told him. By not doing so she took away his free will to be with the real her or not. Their marriage is going to end. Also, a DNA test is a must.

[@sherwoodcs14]

Absolutely need a DNA test!

[@startingtech3900]

Preach!

[@crzyruskie86]

Thank you!

[@mrshappywife8468]

@Mr j your welcome!

[@carryonjeeves]

Yes.

[@thisishisbubbles9362]

This seems like such a good guy. He recognizes the shame she felt in her past and decided it's her past and not their future.

[@cashisqueen3825]

I think another option is divorce. I couldn’t get over that. Especially because she continued hiding it and had to be found out.

[@zeal4god402]

TOTAL AGREEMENT

[@crzyruskie86]

Indeed.

[@jessicacole8404]

If he can't accept it, it is better then staying and being miserable. Less stress and trauma for both. She deserves someone that accepts her too, and by lieing she sold herself short. He isn't hurting her (long term) by leaving

[@greenAbbot]

@@jessicacole8404 For me the issue is why she hid it. If you’ve never hidden anything because your culture told you it was shameful, then you’re a stronger person than I. But they can still build something good together if she learns to let go of that.

[@selfishcapitalist3523]

He has a kid on the way

[@OneEyedOneHornedGian]

That is a tough spot... We all have a past, but that's a tough one to have been surprised by. I hope they don't live in the same town she used to work in. I know I'd need at least that much, but knowing she could keep that secret from him would tell me there are other things they need to learn about each other.

[@rachelmaddowswife8713]

Ohhh good point, the probability of having to interact with former "clients" in the community would be a lot.

[@cooliipie]

No hymen no diamond 💎

[@pinkkfloydd]

"We all have a past" is just another way to say you don't want to take accountability for your actions.

[@OneEyedOneHornedGian]

@pinkkfloydd I assume everyone has done something in their life that doesn't stand the test of their own moral convictions. Some people calapse thinking they are unworthy of their values and some people use it as a turning point to never do it again. My point was that if I were the guy she was with I would feel very uncomfortable knowing she had slept with half the people in the city and possibly some people I knew and hung out or worked with.

[@rebeccasteele9301]

This is a tough one; she *should* have told him before they got married. It's probably also hurting him that he "found out" rather than her telling him

[@smc983]

He will never get that image out of his head. This is not going to end well.

[@araineacutebrownnurse7315]

She is dead wrong for not sharing that information prior to the marriage. That’s a HUGE DEAL ! They need to go to marriage counseling like yesterday

[@unnamedchannel1237]

Hot tub time machine ?

[@triggerticker]

no amount of marriage counseling will fix those, feelings. He will always have a pin in his mind disturbing him. He should test the kid to see if it's even his and then leave.

[@BIGEAGLEDUDE]

This is one of those situations where he's not going to let this go. And the next time they get into argument he will throw in her face to make her feel horrible. This is one of those situations where she should have just left it in the past or told him real early in the relationship before it gets serious. In addition he is most likely going to have doubts after this call about whether or not if their child is his and he will most likely have to request a DNA test just to he's his doubts because I promise you it's only going to get worse before it gets better.

[@Joshuarcade]

Except there is almost nothing worse than THIS

[@johniii8147]

@@Joshuarcade There are MUCH worse things. So she escorted for awhile. Not the end of the world. My questions would have centered around that she didn’t contact anything wasn’t abused. It wouldn’t be around my ego and being jealous.

[@junho679]

Imagine you got a child who is actually not your child and you figured it out later. Omg..

[@johniii8147]

@@junho679 And why would you jump to that conclusion? If you are cheating u go out of your way to hide your tracks

[@johniii8147]

@@r.rodriguez4991 I would disagree. Part of it comes from maturity and experience and being secure in yourself. Yes is surprise but it’s only a big of deal as you choose to make it.

[@DDR88767]

"When your wife was turning tricks"😅😅 This is sad but I cracked up when he said that

[@EmilyLucille523]

This is gonna be tough for them because he found out, she didn’t tell him up front. Anytime they fight in the future her past will be brought up. Not fair for either of them.

[@MrApontjos]

"From the streets she came, and to the streets she shall return" My boy better not be no simp.

[@christopherroot1603]

Sounds like somthing from Fresh and Fit

[@marcroberts5251]

But she's having his kid so it makes things sticky

[@xtinecarter8543]

She belong to the streets 😂. Probably old now and found a beta to settle down with some money. Probably married after being pregnant. He needs to get dna and make that decision. Tough spot to be in. 😫

[@gmarie3053]

As a woman, yes, she found a beta to trap. He won’t leave

[@Sappmattnyc]

@@marcroberts5251 She's having *someone's* kid. The jury's still out on whether or not it's his kid. There is nothing more sneaky than a desperate woman.

[@reinamacaren-a4132]

Imagine if she was with someone he knows; coworkers, friends or family😨 Sounds like that relationship went wayyyyy too fast.

[@blacksquid270]

Wouldn't be surprised if she'd gotten pregnant by a client, found this nice guy who's probably not used to attention from beautiful women, love bombed him and got him to fall head over heels, and he's none the wiser to the sick game.

[@steelersgirl3063]

If someone lies to you about one thing I’m sure there is other things they lie about also and they will always have some excuse as to why they didn’t wanna tell them. I would be afraid that if I couldn’t give her a certain lifestyle then she would go back to doing what she was doing to get it.

[@1623JB]

John is way off base on this one......she didn't confess. He found out. That changes completely how he addresses the future with her.

[@ugomez147]

Aside from all of that shoutout to John, dude is a solid guy. He earned his PHD’s