My Sister Went No Contact When I Couldn't Attend Her Wedding, Now She's Back r/Relationships

[@zachf748]

That whole families behavior is atrocious. Almost every last person in that family is despicable… So sad.

[@jamestown8398]

OP should cut them all off, take her husband's name, and make sure they never see her kids again.

[@Pyrieltmj]

Right, screw them all and go NC.

[@kheventplanner]

Totally agree

[@marissabryan3521]

Or is something op not telling in post … this very suspicious.. vibe of story seem like that one of mom is told twin boys she hated them that she victims.. then daughter told the truth

[@marissabryan3521]

Entire family missing a wedding sus af .

[@carlrood4457]

It almost sounds like the sister was looking for a reason to go NC and pulled the last minute child free card to make sure she couldn't come and then played victim. She then decided to bring the whole thing up again to ruin OP's wedding because she knew she'd never get the invite.

[@marshawargo7238]

I Think sister only wanted an invite, so that she could Decline! OP needs to keep a list of all of the family that side with sister, just to never forget, who the monkeys are! (Keeping All Info Out Of Their Hands!)

[@nerdygeekgamer5528]

I agree but OP didn't plan on getting a divorce around the time her big sister was getting married it just happened sometimes things happen that are out of our control but that doesn't give OP'S sister the right to act the way she is when OP couldn't go to her wedding

[@Artem2034]

I say the sister did a good thing. Now OP knows that her family is a bunch of assholes, just like her sister, and not worthy of time or bothering over it. If OP could read this, I'd say that they should definitely elope but plan a celebration party for the people that will show up. Its the occassion that matters, not how or where it takes place. Fuck the sister and the rest of them. I say the classic that the trash took itself out, so why bring it back to stink up the place.

[@nikkideede7972]

Totally agree but I wonder why op never recorded the call with her sister, with knowing what she said before

[@brianbarber5401]

@@marshawargo7238just go NC with all of that list. They do not bring Good to OP.

[@memeking7273]

Story 1; sounds like we found who Golden Child and Scape Goat is in that family. Also "btw my wedding is Childfree" a week before the actual wedding is an Asshole move

[@KiltBill2]

Yup, but the fact the extended family backed that decision to exclude OPs before, and do so again when they heard both sides, suggests OPs not the blames victim she portrays.

[@slayermoon666]

I was just thinking that

[@owl7072]

Story 2: No because why is it that he can see someone and claim it's because he "has needs" and it's not emotional or anything but the moment Op sees someone and says the _exact same thing,_ he cries and accuses _her_ of ruining the marriage and says it's over? Hypocrites, man, they're wild.

[@Feisty_Elfgirl_5258]

Agreed. I'm amazed that people play stupid games and then are shocked when they win stupid prizes

[@memeking7273]

I feel like the husband thinks "because my wife is not here doing what a wife is supposed to do, it's ok for me to sleep around but she can't, no matter the context"

[@carlrood4457]

Add in that he was multiple times with a "friend" IN THEIR HOME!

[@shugotenshi1569]

@@memeking7273 I feel like the husband isn't thinking

[@memeking7273]

@@shugotenshi1569 2 things. 1. Love that Profile pic. 2. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt, as in "I am assuming he used his brain to come up with a excuse while using his head to clean his own ass"

[@lillithherondale1972]

I love how the husband is trying to say OP ruined the marriage when he's the one who cheated in the first place. I love her petty response of getting her needs fulfilled too

[@analyticmoviereviews101]

I think they're all being terrible and petty people. She's acting like a street corner worker and hooking up with another man; which is pathetic instead of getting a divorce and the husband is equally as terrible a person using the cheating because he has needs card. Both of them deserve one another because they seem to be two pathetic drama playing and thriving nimwits. Both of them are using other people to fulfill their 'needs'. BOTH of them are selfish. BOTH of them are using two other people because they can't be adult enough to either divorce or work it out. Both of those people are pathetic l -o-s-e-r-s.

[@Jamie-gc9cp]

i hope she finds more tinder dates. How many times he met with that friend she should need those guys that many times x10

[@nicknitro86]

"I'm sorry, so will you come to my wedding now?" "Nope, still have kids as of 5 minutes ago."

[@mysterylovescompany2657]

Story 1; Tell your parents you've decided to have a sister-free wedding, but you're sure they have lots of options they could arrange for sister-care during the event. Get as close to a verbatim repeat of her original words as you possibly can.

[@evavocative6975]

I LOVE how I'm not the only one watching old videos from MONTHS ago. XD

[@user-blob]

😂😂😂Nope, you’re not alone there. I’m here for it too!!!

[@carolroberts4614]

Another month on, and here I am!

[@WolframKKM]

Story 2: I love that OP is basically forcing him to put on his big boy pants and end the relationship himself, like he should have done to begin with. It's a lot of emotional labour to be the one crying, screaming and ending things. Let him do it instead! He's the one that fucked up.

[@ZariaTudor1]

Exactly, it was legendary! I live for making people stand in their own shit! She’s my hero😭😭😭

[@AutumnFire1414]

OP pulled a Boss move and it was delightful!

[@Rowancat11]

When I grow up, I want to be her!

[@onepieceisking5493]

Story 1, the sister is toxic. When she heard op told them what she said about op's kids, treated op, she then goes try to get everyone on her side again by more lies just to boycott op's wedding because she's not invited. She only left kicking and screaming because she didn't get her narcissistic way to hurt op like she wanted. Instead was refused entry into op's life and wedding so getting the family to not go was also her retaliation.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

And the fact that the family minus the two relatives were that quick to side with narcissistic sister makes me wonder if narcissistic sister is the family's golden girl. Wouldn't be surprised if that was the case.

[@Davimez]

@@PrincessQ-fj9ly or the family itself is just a bunch of Narcissist's. Would explain why that family except the two relatives and op suck.

[@Feisty_Elfgirl_5258]

The whole family is toxic and needs to be put in the garbage

[@TheBreaker996]

*sniff sniff* do you smell that? That distinct aroma of Golden Child BS. With notes of "be a bigger person" & "we are family" in the composition. I wonder how they justify destroying the OP's wedding in their heads? I bet if they elope without those people, they would be pissed that she "denied the celebration for the family" or some other bs

[@marissabryan3521]

@@TheBreaker996 no no I disagree usually golden child only effect parents not whole family this story vibe give off “I told my son I wish they were never born” vibe a whole fam siding with toxic sister that said shit about KIDS ??? That were under 2 ??? Nah I don’t believe this at all something seem sus af

[@anwarpine6797]

One weeks notice to find overnight childcare for two tiny kids? To me that = I don’t want you to come but I’m to chicken to say it. Or because the sister didn’t want to be seen as the bad guy.

[@paulinadeboer3604]

I smell a golden child and it is not op.

[@kathydurow6814]

@@paulinadeboer3604 Or something happened in the past....at OP's first wedding perhaps?

[@coolcatplays2819]

@@holographicwing I’ve seen you post this sentiment a lot, can you tell me in what universe would it make it OK for what sister in law has done to OP (especially what she said about her kids)? If you don’t remember, let’s restate some of the “sins” sister-in-law has committed. -telling this person who you have a bad history with that their kids are allowed to go to the wedding before hand -A week from the wedding you tell them their kids can’t go - you get into an argument about this issue/after argument you forgive them - you have another argument about this issue because it didn’t go your way -in that new argument you put down OP kids So could you at least give me a hint to what situation would warrant this behavior?

[@coolcatplays2819]

@@holographicwing if it has to do with some thing in the past I think it might involve OP‘s ex partner doing some thing to sister-in-law, and she punishing OP. 🤔

[@emilybarclay8831]

@@holographicwing if you’ve never met a family with a golden child and black sheep, that’s just lucky on your part. But there didn’t need to be a ‘previous incident’ for enablers to side with their golden child

[@glitchyglitchy3925]

Story 1: It's amazing how you can tell the sister has been a golden child all her life from a few paragraphs of text. Drop the family! Story 2: Cheaters can always dish it but can't take it.

[@dianasmith8248]

Story 2: the husband created this problem he can’t get mad now. OP offered to stay married as long as they didn’t have sex together. So now he no longer has a marriage due to his own actions.

[@AndyyWithAY]

The sister is definitely the golden child. No one GAF is OP couldn't attend the sisters wedding because sister tells her at the last minute she can't bring her 2 babies. And that reason is asinine. Who was she supposed to find to watch her babies a week before?? It was more likely if she had time. Just elope or do friends and fiance's family only

[@Azulakayes]

Dealing with a golden child makes no sense.

[@psyolytesaille]

Those in laws could've very well stolen her kids for the dad.

[@Mama_Bear_of_3]

Someone saying that they had an affair, but it didn't mean anything, it was just sex, to me is a hell of a lot worse. That means that they throw away your love and your life together for something that didn't even mean anything. If he came to me and said I'm so sorry I caught feelings for them and I couldn't help myself, they still be gone but at least it wouldn't be as bad as it meant nothing I have no feelings

[@ronhall5395]

Well the dude is a liar. Yeah, he didn't want to mess up.his marriage, but he did have feelings for his AP. He just felt it was ok because he had needs. He was lying to himself also. Guys go without for years and they dont die. That is the dumbest excuse ever. Oh well play dumb games, win dumb prizes.

[@ZomBeeQueeen]

Exactly!!!

[@jofip9199]

The sheer audacity from the husband in story 2

[@krystinreives7776]

Story 2: seriously, all I can see from the OP’s husband is a hypocritical lying D bag. this guy is a massive hypocrite for the very instance that he was caught cheating.he reacted the same way up he reacted after finding out he was cheating.I was basically using the same excuse he was just to make it clear. I don’t agree with the method of finding somebody else while still married to this idiot, but I love the idea of basically karma and just hitting him with the same amount of pain he put on you.

[@artygirl66]

Okay OP on the last story was incredibly petty but in the most amazing way. Like at the end when he was crying that SHE destroyed the marriage, I literally LOL'd so hard. I hope she does well in life and the baby grows up healthy and happy.

[@jedimasters1462]

If she had just left him, yeah, it would be all his fault, but the moment she began what she did and the fact that she thinks cheating is OK when the other cheats makes her almost as guilty as him. If she does go cheating in revenge, when their son finds out, most likely he'll hate both of his parents for being that selfish, and both are. Cheating is cheating and revenge cheating is even worse because it doesn't just hurt the husband, but the op, their son and possibly the poor fool that gets dragged into it because she wants to hurt her husband. She should take a year off from the internship and work on at lease herself before she does something that will be worse than what he did. Also, even with him cheating, chances are that he'll get custody of the son since he's the one that has been there all week and most likely has a paying job. Interns either don't get paid or get paid little because it's more of a learning thing than a full job. If she goes f*cking guys just as revenge, the judge may also see her as unstable so won't want to put the child in that kind of environment. Just her mind games may hurt her case. Revenge can be sweet at the time, but sometimes it can come and bite you in the a$$.

[@woofmeow5752]

@@jedimasters1462 honestly I think she can’t be put on the same level as him. Once one partner cheats, they open the relationship. All she was doing was doing what he set as the standard in their relationship. She even gave him the courtesy of knowing about it first, and even who the guy was. In court she can definitely push that he cheated and she just followed his standard afterwards. And I’m pretty sure the relationship was over once she learnt he cheated anyways, and I doubt she would of been able to convince him to separate amicably unless she gave him a taste of his own medicine. A months long affair VS a hookup with the knowledge of the partner aren’t even comparable

[@randomusername3873]

@@jedimasters1462 the person doing the first offende is the one at fault. He deserves everything

[@ditzyhere3138]

@@jedimasters1462 nah, i think she decided it was over when she couldn't stop imagining all the places they'd banged in their marital home but he deluded himself into thinking this was fixable. She just let him know there wasn't a chance in hell that was gonna happen.

[@kaylaprice370]

I hope she told the friends husband. Cus screw her

[@tictactoe325]

OP1 - the sister totally had every intention of OP not being at the wedding. She didn’t want her there in the first place. Sounds like there’s a whole tonne of previous history between OP and her sister.

[@kathydurow6814]

Yes, definitely something missing from the story.

[@kitsumekat]

That she was married and had kids before her?

[@TsukiKageTora]

Story 1: imagine being a family member and supporting sister after she decided to go NC after she attacked OP and her children cause she lied to OP about her children not being there until a week until the wedding? OP should go NC with everyone who doesn’t go because they chose who the golden child was: a person who literally insulted children during their uprooting of life with having divorced parents.

[@jeaninebowdry2045]

I think OP should have recorded the convo then posted it on Facebook… “I met with my sister today…”

[@trillionbones89]

Worthless people all around

[@RequiemPoete]

A letter informing "mom and dad" they now only have one daughter and have lost all access to their grandkids for the rest of their lives would be a good start.

[@davewriter100]

Maybe deep down, they are Christian/uber religious to the point of being equivalent to a nunnery. Because she's divorced, OP doesn't exist in their eyes, and they believe that siding with the married sister is a somewhat tactful way of telling her so.

[@Original_Tenshi_Chan]

@@jeaninebowdry2045 YES! Thank you! I said this exact same thing on another comment. OP *KNEW* her "sister" was a spiteful, hate filled pus factory, so why the hell didn't she record the conversation?!? She could have posted it to FB, tagged the "sister", all the family, her friends, coworkers, boss and send one to her HR because I'm sure they have some kind of policy on bigotry (which seems to be what OP is hinting at regarding the children. My guess is that OP and "sissy" are white, and OP's ex is not. Or it may be religion related. But for someone to take that fucked up of a stance and the family to still back them even after hearing all the hateful words, it usually has to involve racism or religious zealotry.) But now, instead, "sister" wins again.. OP is still the bad guy, the entire family has turned their backs on her, "sister" got to cancel OP's wedding for her, and "sister" was praised for rubbing salt in the wound. And now, all OP has to show for it is a noodle spine and her general moroseness.

[@Telamere]

The narcistic sister didn't want OP to attend and didn't warn her the wedding was child free to create drama. She knew OP didn't trust the grandparents to babysit. Now she is turning OPs wedding into a direct competition and is stealing guests for a vow renewal. She should have recorded her sister and then shared it with all relatives.

[@cookingkurry4384]

In story 2 Op had no thoughts of reconciliation in mind, she came off in her writings as very sarcastic, the husband is a hypocrite and no it's not up to him is the marriage is over, op already called it over when she found the texts.

[@ronhall5395]

Right, he didn't even understand his own wife. Mom knew! She didn't like it, but she understood.

[@julianne089]

Seriously best wedding present ever for all those toxic people to remove themselves from your life!

[@literallycringeidk360]

Damn, this OP really turned it around on him! Super proud of her for having such a backbone.

[@Davimez]

Love how the ex tried to play the victim but got his ass handed to him on a golden platter. Not one for revenge ........ But hey it's already over might as well 🙂

[@brandygiovinazzi3460]

I agree. He already put the final nail in that coffin and dug the hole for it, she just filled in the hole. The divorce decree is the last step here and that'll be the tombstone of their relationship.

[@ThatRedhedd]

Very refreshing to see a woman handle a cheating spouse so fiercely! 🙌🏼

[@madambutterfly1997]

Cheating on me in any aspect in any way possible is an automatic we’re done.

[@madambutterfly1997]

A temporary solution is just abstaining. Is a lack of sex in your life really life-threatening that you would go so far as to cheat? Disgusting

[@kathydurow6814]

Sex is not a need. It's a want. There's always loving yourself anyway if you're really needing the physical. Or a good massage or hugging someone platonically for touch. Talks with your SO for emotional intimacy (that's what the telephone, Zoom etc are for?). There's no excuse.

[@mindyschocolate]

She wasn’t even gone that long. He’s pathetic.

[@emilybarclay8831]

@@kathydurow6814 exactly. I haven’t had sex once, if sex was a ‘need’ id be long dead lol

[@belial3781]

or, novel idea: he could've tried talking to his partner. Like if he can't keep it in his pants for a few days he could've told op they needed to find a solution. phone sex, coming to visit op, buying a blow-up doll, there could have been any type of solution if op's ex just had the truly groundbreaking idea of discussing things with his fuckin wife, like a normal person. either way the ex is garbage.

[@KCCAT5]

Similar to what I said I said a temporary solution would be to spit twice and go for it. Why do they feel like the world is coming to an end if they don't get nookie every other day?

[@MsTemptation]

S2: I agree with everything op did because her soon to be ex needed to know what it feels like so she let him step in her shoes. Of course now he wants a divorce because op wasn’t the doormat he was expecting her to be. I actually applaud op for letting him feel her pain and for not going after the cheating husbands affair partner. It’s up to the married partner to keep their marriage vows. I wish op luck and an awesome life. She’s strong and not to be reckoned with because she knows her worth.

[@ThatRedhedd]

Totally - it's so refreshing to see a woman handle a cheating spouse so fiercely! 🙌🏼

[@diamcole]

I don’t want the affair partner to be physically hurt but I hope it blows up in her face, eventually. Cheating is so unnecessary. Communicate your desire to open the relationship or your desire to end it.

[@cheergiver]

I had a wedding with 20 or so people. I did most of it myself, and had some help with food from my MIL and mom. She could have a lovely small wedding if she felt up to setting it up herself.

[@nvfury13]

Ours had about that many people, my brother officiated in their apartment in a Victorian-style mansion converted to apartments. Then we had the reception at my parents’ place.

[@iamthesocks]

Same. I had 18 people in my wedding, including me and my husband. I have a huge family, but don't greatly enjoy having the spotlight on me, so we did a small wedding at the keys and paid for the hotel of those we cared about most to be there, then had a mini vacation with them afterwards! Worked out great and then we had a big reception with everyone else when we got back home.

[@frankhooper7871]

Must admit, that sounds about right to me - I can't imagine wanting more people there than that.

[@mariajw4803]

Me too, but we were less than 20. I had our reception/party or what you call it in our small, tiny garden. There were more people at the ceremony though.

[@ditzyhere3138]

Maybe it was their ideal wedding they could no longer afford? I don't really get why the price per person would go up being a thing to worry about? If you make a budget of $1000 you're gonna spend that much if you have 50 or 10 people.

[@GiordanDiodato]

I smell a golden child in Story 1 and it's definitely not OP

[@capucnechaussonpassion14]

Story 2 : the fact that he suggested so quickly that she quit her internship says it all... He just couldn't bear the idea of her doing something for herself and kind of outsmarting him, dis cheat to make that situation stop but thankfully his plan didn't work. Incredible how so many men just don't want their wives to succeed... In 2022...

[@genovevaugarte1312]

Don't generalise. Most men are supportive of their partners.

[@NottyAries]

@@genovevaugarte1312 Don't generalize - how do you know what most men do? FYI, they didn't generalize saying just "men" or "all men," would be generalizing. Relax.

[@ronniec427]

Story 1: No one hurts like family. OPs family, especially her sister, is garbage.

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

Story 1: If you want to have a childfree wedding, then be prepared for some people with children to not be able to attend. Especially if they aren’t told far enough in advance to try figure it out. Also at 3:30. She didn’t mention it was childfree to manipulate OP. Sucks for her, having to deal with the consequences of her own actions 😂. Sucks how bad it turned out for OP in the end, at least all of those people are out of her life now. But still sucks. Honestly, I feel OP should share this post with all of her family and then ghost them forever. Story 2: I hope the mentions of revenge cheating is just jokes. It’s certainly more justified than normal cheating, but still bad. Edit: At least she was honest about it. And I don’t really feel bad about this. This one was justified. At 17:50. The problem is that trust is broken. They very well may change for the better and never plan to do it again. But how can you believe them? They lied again. How do you know that they aren’t just lying again. And staying with them, with that resentment, is a bad plan for everyone.

[@tephrafalls6321]

I personally believe in story 2 that OP just had that knee-jerk reaction of dark humour, but for her the relationship was already over. It's not mentioned anywhere that she wants to truly work on her relationship with her ex, aside from a quick mention of opening the relationship. And even then, it's mentioned in such a way that she KNEW her ex didn't want that before even mentioning it. Ex wanted his cake and eat it too. And she threw that in his face. He deserved it. "I'm allowed to sleep with others but you're not" is a tale as old as time. Best to move on.

[@Mewse1203]

Story 1: also..like don't lie and telll them they will be able to bring their kids and then a week before drop a bomb on them then get mad that they aren't able to accommodate.

[@Original_Tenshi_Chan]

@@tephrafalls6321 Yeah, I agree. And I think any niggling thoughts OP may have held onto in hopes of repairing her broken marriage were destroyed when the husband relayed his "plan" to "fix" the marriage. It all involved HER making sacrifices to make HIM feel better about being a piece of shit and so he doesn't lose HIS "property". She has to quit her internship? She has to put her career and dream job on hold for "at least a year"? She has to remain faithful and excuse his "need getting"? So she has to give up her career and connections, her money and ability to leave him, and move back into his AP-Bangpad (trademark pending), all while prostrating herself to prove her fidelity and "earn his trust"...? It all feels bass-ackwards and designed to take her road to freedom (The career, connections, and money) while breaking her down ("the marriage ending is YOUR fault, not mine! I could forgive myself for having needs! I can never forgive YOU for cheating!", "are you _really_ going to throw our family away over nothing?!", etc). I'm curious if OP lives in the US, or if she lives some place where affairs affect the divorce outcome. Either way. I hope she takes him to the cleaners, and that she pulls her head out of her ass regarding telling the AP's spouse. Regardless if OP thinks he's a douchebag or not, he still deserves to know if his lovely, cheating wife is exposing him to STIs. OP and the douchebag AP husband both need to get tested. I'm willing to bet she isn't the hubby's first AP, and OP's hubby isn't her first AP either.

[@lapsedgoth]

Story 1: OPs sister has some serious loathing for OP. You don't wait till the last minute to tell someone their wedding is no kids, not unless you don't actually want them to come. I'm surprised OP didn't bring backup to the meeting with sis. Make the boycotters see what they're standing for. Hope we get the finished story one day

[@akl2k7]

Yeah, she should have either brought backup or recorded the conversation in case the sister said anything incriminating.

[@mayurakshimukherjee7948]

May be, they wanted op to stay with her ex (even if her sister was miserable) & thus wanted op to be forced to ask her ex-in lwas for help. May be she wanted op to lose custody.

[@toshi9742]

Story 1: Tbh I’m petty and if OP is too I’d suggest her saying “sorry sis but my wedding’s child free so you can’t come”

[@anya0410]

With a recording of the sisters last comment. This is the child you support

[@toshi9742]

@@anya0410 ?

[@AndyyWithAY]

Guys like the husband in story 2 piss me off. Rules for thee not for me. I can cheat, but if you cheat is betrayal and end of the world.

[@hothotheat3000]

Story 2: good on you for putting it right in his face that you had needs, too. And like a true narcissist, he put all the blame on you. Maybe one day he will realize the pain he has caused, but by then, you’ll be getting your needs met full time elsewhere. Bravo!

[@britnicox3929]

1: This is a lovely little filter event for OP exactly where she stands in her family’s eyes. I hope she elopes and they go to a beautiful honeymoon and I hope the fiancé’s family can take care of her the way her family won’t. These people lost access to grandkids (if they want them) 2: it’s so gross that he did this in their house! And that he has the absolute audacity to be upset that she did exactly the same thing to him he did to her? His betrayal was something that he could reconcile for but when she did it to him all of a sudden it’s something he refuses to come back from?? Pathetic and selfish

[@neil999ish]

Story one. Hope it is not grandparent's right's state/country, and they have that "claimable" right.

[@britnicox3929]

@@neil999ish agreed! Though most require the grandparents to have a relationship beforehand to go off on, and if they never meet them they won’t have that to go off on. I just hope OP is in one of those states

[@mezzokitty247]

Story 2: OP’s soon-to-be-ex husband is so hypocritical that it’s both sad and laughable. He seems to also be the kind of guy sexist enough to believe that because he is a man he is allowed to cheat to have his “needs” met and that OP can’t do the same because she is a woman. So glad OP called him out over text in such a hilariously petty way and is getting away from him, but I think she def will need some therapy to recover from this, especially since him showing up at her place with their child almost manipulated her into staying with him and she did essentially use revenge sex to get back at him, which could’ve led to more issues.

[@analyticmoviereviews101]

Both of them are pathetic. Her for not divorcing him and creating maximum drama and him for being an a hat. Both are terrible people and both are using one another and other people for their 'needs' and not taking responsibility or accountability.

[@missmax2492]

​@@analyticmoviereviews101pretty sure that she was done with him immediately lol. Decided that she wanted to make him feel the same pain. Can you really cheat when it's obvious You're only legally married?

[@lovinglifebutnotonearth3909]

Story One update: my wedding was pretty small, ess than 20 and I had no issues getting a vendor to host me or set up catering.

[@AndyyWithAY]

OP has no goals of reconciliation. Just get a divorce. What's the point in staying married up someone when the husband is just going to be your roommate. Get divorced and move on with someone who won't cheat on you.

[@Kris-wo4pj]

tax write offs and all the perks of a roommate. like seriously married people get way too many tax breaks for no reason.

[@kathydurow6814]

@@Kris-wo4pj Its because governments want people to get together & have kids so there's another generation of workers/consumers/taxpayers. Capitalism at its finest, need to give an incentive. I doubt the OP really thought her marriage was going to survive unless they really did open it up. Some people don't necessarily need monogamy if there's open communication and agreement about boundaries etc. But that's a very small number I suspect. And hubbie was trotting out all the typical cheating excuse lines like "needs" and "it didn't mean anything to me". Good on OP too for placing the blame directly on the husband and not being deflected to the AP.

[@RequiemPoete]

Do remember a good chunk of that was pure venting.

[@AndyyWithAY]

The sister was out of line. Of course you want your sister there, but what the f**k is your sister supposed to do last minute with her 2 babies when she's going through a divorce??

[@BellaNoceur008]

If she'd already paid for the wedding venue, send invites to reddit (as long as you don't dox yourself) xD You'll have way more fun with people who want to attend, even if they are strangers xD

[@PiscesMoon2You]

OP your sister is absolutely jealous of you. Is she the Golden Child? She created the drama then and now on purpose to get family on her side and all there attention. Time to create your family by choice and ditch the others.

[@treehouse2902]

1. OP should go no contact with the whole family and have her small wedding anyway. The sister is a gaslighting narcissist. 2. Get a divorce. Period.

[@SailorMya]

Golden child much! It is super obvious that OP has had to deal with this crap ALL her life and her "family" doesn't care about her or her kids. She is far better off!

[@thekawaiiseeall]

I'm upset at S1 OP's conclusion - I can't believe her whole family is horrible.

[@___LC___]

If you only have 20 guests, you can do a location wedding somewhere with white sand and sun. Then do not send invites to anyone in solidarity with the sister. The money not used on a huge venue and feeding 200 people can be used to assist guests with accommodations or flights.

[@n.a.nameless5435]

#1: I like the suggestion of "denial of leverage". Pre-emptively uninvite all family members that are even remotely inclined to behave like horses' asses. "I won't be attending." "Yeah, I know, you are not invited, so you not attending kind of goes without saying"

[@GBunnyG]

Story 1: OH, hell no. Elope to somewhere beautiful with the money and block them all.

[@devlyn873]

Story 2: honestly, what a queen. A++ reaction. No notes.

[@astronautviolet153]

Story :1 Maybe Op is the scapegoat of the family and the sister is the golden child, because that's how it felt like.

[@CricketHop-vf8km]

I was a bridesmaid for my sister. I wasn’t sure what that entailed as I’d never been one but I wasn’t supposed to be there according to the universe. Finances became so complicated and I had surprise bill increases and didn’t think I’d be able to make it one month before the damn thing because of those surprises. She was more focused on how she wanted her wedding to look 🙄. I tried my best to inform my sister as soon as an issue came up. Luckily, I ended up being able to attend most things and the wedding. My sister rarely calls me, we’ve spoken about 20 ish times in over twenty years in all and I’m the one who reaches out first 90% of them time. She always says being blood (were half sisters from a bio fam, adopted into different homes) is so important, yet she rarely starts a conversation, uses me as a therapist most of the time (and those are our longest convos, regular ones last 15 minutes or so), and we’ve only seen each other in person three times after not being in each other’s presence since 2006. I was the ONLY one in her bridal party without a seat. Clearly, she doesn’t have time for me so……yeah. Can relate.

[@RokoFireFox]

Story 2, the BALLS op's husband has be upset at op. Makes me laugh.

[@Kalossupremacy3356]

Cheaters always get so snippy when the betrayed moves on, legit so many stories where the cheater acts like the other person is who broke the marriage 😭 I remember one where the wife had an affair with her boss, then get super upset and acting like op was cheating on her when he was meeting with the bosses wife.

[@GeorgeGiann]

Last story, she married a narcissist. I hope she doesn't cave. Life is too short.

[@DisneyChar]

She already said the marriage was over, his response was hilarious, especially with his compromise of she comes home, cripple herself financially, while he works on the marriage.

[@zachf748]

*_Story #2_* She’s awesome… She handled that perfectly, and her husbands hypocrisy is hilarious. Lol

[@videofan1010]

I feel like a lot of men behave like this. Like they behave as though they can have sex and people are supposed to still feel the same about them. But if a woman has sex it's a deal breaker.

[@analyticmoviereviews101]

No. She like her husband is a pathetic person. Both people are acting childish and immature. Both are using people. Both are selfish. They need a divorce although both deserve one another because they're cut from the same cloth it appears. Both of them are pathetic l osers.

[@Kalossupremacy3356]

It’s crazy how these cheaters be acting like the victim, reminds me of the one where op’s wife was acting like the divorce was all his fault when he tried to fix his marriage intially and divorced when she cheated again. They be insanely obtuse

[@johnowen9349]

Story 1: "If you choose not to come to my wedding in solidarity, choose not to have contact with me for three years in solidarity too. This is a closed topic."

[@fallingawayfromthenorm]

Story 1 - I’m so sick of all of these brides and grooms who make this big deal about people making a choice they aren’t happy about based on rules like childfree weddings. People are more than in their right to RSVP “no” when short notice bombs about not being able to bring the kids they’d been told are welcome are dropped on them. The tantrums they throw when people RSVP “no” should be an indicator how immature they are. The family isn’t worth the trouble, I hope OP stays NC for the long run unless and until they actually make up for all of it.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

Me too. She deserves so much better than her toxic family, especially her narcissistic sister!

[@ThatRedhedd]

Everything I've heard about weddings on Reddit makes me never want to have one.

[@starbird3939]

Update 1 What a terrible person. The sister sabotaged OP’s wedding. I think OP realized that she never had a family

[@ajaxjohnson7999]

I had to pause and laugh at "DecimatedAnus" as well!!! 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@Akiku2]

I still binge these vids even if I've heard them before. I love listening to Mark's voice! It's so soothing! Also, if anyone ever threatened not to attend something I host in solidarity of someone else not being invited, I'd just reply with "Don't threaten me with a good time."

[@ThatRedhedd]

Seriously...I'd say something about who they're choosing to show solidarity with and if it's not with me, good riddance.

[@mamakitty6549]

I only had 30 people at my wedding. You don't have to elope, just do a garden wedding with just the small amount of people. It can still be beautiful. Have the wedding you want with the people you love and that love you back.

[@shebakoby]

story 1: "Tell me the sister is the Golden Child and OP is the scapegoat, without using any of those words" Also sister sounds like a full-blown Cluster-B disaster narc manipulator

[@cyberhard]

That last story... If what's good for the goose is good for the gander was a person.

[@Weirdandwonderfull19]

Wow, so OPs sister is the golden child by the sounds of it. With "family" like these, who needs enemies?!

[@Andrea.S.Alvey12]

2nd story: does anyone else wonder about the wh's need to always remind his affair partner there will be no sleep overs, it's only sex, he loves his wife? It has me wondering if the AP has feelings for wh that aren't reciprocated (so far)?

[@JohnSears1970]

story 1: If you are going to have a child free wedding, *Tell your guests* as soon as the invitation is tendered. If you wait to inform a guest of that *a week prior to the wedding* you deserve whatever response you get.

[@Mitsubachi2529]

5:33 I always chuckle when I see thoughtful comments with vulgar screen names 🙃😂

[@wheelsndealz]

Story 1. I usually like to play Devil's advocate and offer alternative explanations/insights since Reddit usually covers the most negative views. But after hearing more about the sister, nah, I'll pass.

[@jodieg6318]

Sister in story 1 sounds like a case of Golden Child. You don’t get to that kind of toxic family dynamic without there being whole history of similar crap.

[@candypettynettie487]

Op's family in story 1 will regret that.

[@Russman67]

Story 2: The husband taking about OP ruining the marriage after he started hooking up with another married woman not even two months after OP left on an internship. I eye rolled hard enough to see my brain on that one. Boy Bye!

[@CarlosSantos-kv9ip]

Story 2: Why is the cheating partners situation being considered? If her husband is such a dangerous person, then she should probably not provoke him by cheating. At some point, common sense needs to take over

[@66DoodleGal]

OP should’ve told her sister that she’s looking forward to her inevitable divorce. And the parents better NOT expect anytime with the kids

[@CanonSkyrissian]

I'm all for child-free weddings but please please like with everything else wedding related notify about it early enough so guests who have kids have time to make arrangements!

[@jennilynne1977]

I hope everyone is having a great day/evening/night! Peace, hugs and love to you all!

[@austinfowler2707]

Story 2: did someone really pull the "people divorce too quickly" too a cheating story???

[@MeekoButterbean]

It’s fine to have a child free wedding, but you need to give people enough notice so they have time to arrange child care and be okay with the fact that not everyone will be able too, so not everyone will be able to come. To go no contact over that is ridiculous. I can’t help but suspect the sister did all that on purpose, she only gave one weeks notice to OP that it’s child free, expecting her not to be able to get child care so she’d be unable to come. Then blow it way out of proportion by cutting off contact, which is possibly what she wanted all along. Then when she heard about OP’s wedding she saw an opportunity to poison the family against her and ran with it. It’s unlikely, but not impossible.

[@marygilbert6105]

Story 1: I agree with Mark. The couple should elope, and use the money they would have spent on a wedding to spoil themselves on a fantastic honeymoon. They can have a little "at-home" party after they get home from the honeymoon, and invite whoever they want. This can be a dinner party, a come-and-go "tea" with snacks and drinks, a backyard barbecue, basically whatever *they* want to do, with the people who are supportive of them.

[@ThatRedhedd]

Story 2, OP, can we be friends? 😂 OP sounds like one of the coolest & funniest people! I love the snark! 👌🏼

[@SherriLyle80s]

Hurting someone with cheating and when they defend themselves and strike back, surprise Pikachu face. Douche Canoe made his bed, now he has to sleep in it.

[@Sw0rdnBoard]

Child free people are the most emotionally stunted people on the planet

[@abeal49]

I totally agree. "child free" is code for "heavy drinking." it's a party for falling-down drunks.

[@crazypyp5871]

The husband in story two is such a hypocrite with a "rules for thee but not for me" attitude. Why is he allowed to go behind OP's back and sleep with someone but OP can't do the same after the fact? Oh right, because he's selfish.

[@Andrea.S.Alvey12]

I kinda hope we hear an update that she slept with tinder-cutie the same number of times her arsehole of a husband slept with the "friend".

[@DarkAngel65989]

So the first story if I was OP I would say when the sister ask about the date of the wedding. I would say,"oh don't worry about the date, the wedding is cancel, how about you plans something for everyone since they care more about your want and need then mine" then I'll leave

[@NCAnon]

I feel like that would give her the satisfaction she's craving. Just block her and the family and live a stress free life. They will miss every important milestone in OP and their family's life and OP will live a better life with the tumors cut out/off

[@DarkAngel65989]

@@NCAnon true, but it would just to get off the chest, and then just like you said to just block them

[@Nevertoleave]

I’d send a screen shot of the convo to the rest of the family and then block everyone

[@taetannim3581]

Oh, honey no, use the money you save on guests to have either a super fancy, small wedding or put it toward the honeymoon or hell, a house in a different area code!

[@autumn557]

You know where you stand when solidarity doesn’t apply to you but does for a sister. No one gave a crap she wasn’t at her sisters wedding but now it’s a travesty that the sister won’t come to hers.

[@justinchristoph3725]

First story: You don't tell someone that they can bring their minor children who cannot be left by themselves to a wedding, then less than a week before the wedding, say that's no longer an option and expect them to still come. I don't know what is up with that sister. She had known from the beginning that the wedding would be child-free, but led the OP on thinking that she would be able to take them before dropping that it wasn't less that a week before the wedding and expects her to just find a babysitter for them... then refuses to speak to her sister for three years when she can't make it? No, that sister lost the right to expect an invitation to the OP's wedding after pulling that crap. The family members who refused to come are assholes as well and I would just write them off.

[@hlb9834]

Yeesh.... Both stories are bonkers. Story #1's truly sad. I hope OP and her fiance decided to elope and have the best honeymoon. Also, I seriously hope OP posted this story on a different social media platform so the rest of the family could read it (Seriously doubt it'll do anything...) and has gone NO CONTACT with family members that sided with the evil Golden Child sister forever. OP's children don't need to be exposed to that toxicity. Story #2 had my head spinning big time! o_o

[@nela3986]

I wonder why OP didn't share the Reddit post with everyone. Something doesn't add up. Second story... OP somehow upsets me. She and her husband shouldn't have had a baby. I feel for the little one.

[@walkingcorpse4174]

Story 1: sisters jealous of her sister for "ruining her big day" if anything shes like my sister and the only/best thing you can do is still have your wedding and not let her get to you if any of them still talk to you, id tell them if you dont know why ive kicked you out of my life its because some how you thought that helping her destroy my wedding was equivalent to me not being able to find a babysitter on a short notice, (she probably set you up on that one to. Did it so she would have a reason to be mad)

[@amberleeannalee1999]

Op should take the twenty guests on a paid resort trip for her wedding. Post pics all over social media bragging about family not being blood. Tag the in-laws and guests along with Ops family

[@abeal49]

story 2: OP is just nuts. You either work on your marriage or you call it quits, but you don't involve other people. revenge cheating just uses another person and makes things worse

[@monky7628]

I never understood what people like about child-free weddings? Aren't weddings family events where two families merge into one big one? Don't the children also belong to that?

[@Grace_x68]

Story 1 elope to romantic place with small church. Enjoy a super honeymoon. Don't sweat the small stuff. All toxic family is small stuff

[@fufufuaru]

so she STILL didn't tell the ap's husband???

[@ditzyhere3138]

I don't usually throw out terms like narcissist aound but OP's sister for real has to be one. Now that I've thought about it, what if the vow renewal/party on OP's wedding day was always her game plan? Get the dates and then set up her own party to take the family away from OP? It's clear that making up with OP was never her intention.

[@rilo7891]

Story 2: Both OP and husband are AHs. She is just as bad as him. They deserve each other.

[@JMac7395]

Story 1: a wedding can be as small (5-10 people) or as big as the bride & groom wants it be. This isn't the 19th or 20th century were all weddings must have 100- 200 people. Minimumlist Weddings are slowly becoming more popular. One of the great things about small weddings is that you spend significantly less money on certain things than you would on a larger scale wedding. I hope OP has her wedding with her small guest list. I also hope OP goes no contact with all the relatives that disinvited themselves from the wedding

[@mkitten13]

The OP in the last story was just plain awesome, did not out the AP to her bad husband, put the blame squarely on her own cheating spouse (unlike SO many other people who likes to blame the AP even when they forgive their own spouse - and worse some of them blame a kid resulting from an affair while forgiving the cheating spouse) and then decided turnaround was fair play, only she was completely open and honest to her husband about it. That's one hell of a shiny spine and I admire it. Hubby was a massive AH and hypocrite to blame her for the marriage ending. Nope, that was all his own doing.

[@ThatRedhedd]

100% I want to be that OP's friend!

[@Man.of.Tomorrow]

Honestly my response on story 2 is that it's bullshit. Being petty is childish, just divorce the cheating husband and move on. Cheating on a cheater doesn't make you better, it makes you as bad as them. ESH.

[@luke_at_my_art]

Yeah, it is just wild that eveyeone is praising OP to have a revenge affair-