Narcissist Rebound Relationships

[@N0_3XCUSZ]

I am not sold on the idea that narcissists rebound. Narcissists are generally grooming new supplies while at the same time possibly cheating with old supplies while in a relationship with you. So, by the time of the discard, the narcissist had already been preparing themselves since the devaluation stage for your eventual discard. It wasn't an instant rebound. It was someone who they were already seeing and grooming behind your back.

[@transitionsnc]

Agree. They usually have several people on the hook. It's easy these days with electronic communication.

[@N0_3XCUSZ]

​​@@transitionsncagreed. The narcissist will usually discard after a slow and increasingly toxic devaluation stage. The devaluation stage is the narcissist way of mentally preparing themselves to discard. This new supply who the narcissist discards you for is usually someone who the narcissist has already been seeing for a lengthy period of time. Lengthy, by narcissistic standards. So by the discard, the narcissist is already mentally leaps and bounds ahead of the person who they are discarding. At this point the narcissists have already had plenty of time to become indifferent, and to simply move on to a new source or sources of supply. Co-dependents rebound, narcissists already have someone waiting to take your place.

[@transitionsnc]

@@N0_3XCUSZ Yes. I completely agree. Excellent way of describing the situation. For a narcissist, it's more like a seamless transition. All the best to you.

[@nicolahoerler]

They will if they fall out of the abuse cycle with the new supply. As soon as their plan falls apart(new supply breaks up) they will almost certainly text their exes

[@Liz-wz8dh]

Exactly.

[@WarmandHardy]

I left my cheating ex wife a year ago and she told me she regrets everything and is begging me to come back but I refuse. Steph helped me stay strong and opened my eyes to who she really is.

[@ewljr]

You’ll never trust her again

[@Creating2413]

You did the right thing. You will find the right woman to respect and honor and value you.

[@topher198133]

Persona non grata

[@Holly-d1n]

Good for you. Those cheating wives are the worst I hear. Don't give up there's lots of faithful wives that ended up with cheating husbands too.

[@CitiesOfAsh]

Her brain will subconsciously think you're weak for taking her back after her infidelity. Stay strong and do not go backwards. It will NOT get better.

[@jamieseiple]

I married a psycho and stayed way too long. It was either leave her or die, so I left. The sooner you leave a narc the better and less you will lose. LEAVE!

[@Holly-d1n]

Don't be hard on yourself there's so much to think about when you're trying to leave. You have to fix your mind before you can do it. There's never a wrong time to leave. Just stay gone

[@1love847]

Yup. Totally relate. I rmemeber the day I felt it in my gut that I knew he could lose it and harm me. I found a new place the next day moved out 3 days later and he still didn't want me to leave and called the police to try to prevent me from getting my things. He was soooooooo mentally ill. I watch these videos to remind me that I am still healing and moving I'm the right direction no matter what because I left and saved my own life.

[@allans7281]

Fine with a nine-month sentence Didn’t know what it was when I was in it I instinct said no contact and run for the exit . Now I’ve learned all about narcissism and it’s devastating effects

[@stevenkovler5133]

My mind is so messed up. I’m afraid of a feather these days

[@GlassellPark]

@@allans7281so you saw the red flags early on? What happen when the switch went off and you said this woman is not who she is pretending to be?

[@WM-tj3gm]

You’re Not Alone! This stuff happens to the best of us. 👍🏻

[@skillz785]

If there's no trust, there's no relationship...

[@Areutherehello]

I experienced being the placeholder for a man for two years. He had someone else on the back burner while she was overseas--I had no clue about this until the day of the "sudden reveal". I believed all that time that he was in love with me, and that I had, for once, been chosen. It just darned near broke me in half when I found out that he and this secret woman had gotten married. As soon as he figured out that I knew the truth, I was discarded. It is incredibly painful and cruel to play with someone and their feelings while carrying on another relationship behind their back just because you need your ego stroked. Four years later, I'm still recovering. I have hope for true love. But, I'm improving myself to avoid just blindly falling for someone like this guy.

[@lookupyourredemptiondrawsn7285]

U will find your true love!

[@Rett-qv7ti]

That must’ve been very difficult. It’s a lot to sort out once you see the person and your relationship clearly. I’m glad you’re working on yourself. It can take years to break patterns and attract a healthy partner. Don’t rush that process - best gift you can give yourself! 🙏 I highly recommend the book “Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist…”

[@Solossandy]

Confusion about it all can keep us stuck and also make us distrust ourselves/judgement.

[@jafhio2284]

Narcissist are serial cheaters!

[@jaredguevara8660]

Thank you for this video. It's really sad that people like this really do exist. They will never comprehend the damage they do to a person when they betray the individual that's committed to them. I think the hurt will never fully go away, but after the experience i learned so much about myself and i actually am a stronger person and better off in life now. Turn that pain into purpose friends.

[@Holly-d1n]

It goes away when you realize they can't think like you. They couldn't and wouldn't commit anymore than a pig can.

[@nickus51]

They are just cruel. Mine discarded me about a year and a half ago. For her birthday, she was in awe, her words were that she is speechless, that no one ever did something like that for her. Not even a month later it was like everything flipped. The devaluation and stonewalling began. I gave her distance to cool off. However few weeks later we had an xmas get together with a common social circle when she brought together "her new boyfriend" without saying a word. I left the gathering and confronted her about it a few days later. To which all I got was accusations how I made the drama at the gathering (I kept my emotions in check, simply said goodbye to others, said that it is too much for me and left), how it is all my fault without any explanation whatsoever, how I could possibly think I had a chance with her etc. It was one of the most shocking and hurtful experiences ever. Not even losing my bestfriend few years ago in car accident left such an impact on me. I felt used, taken advantage off, discarded. That was second narcissistic relationship, but the first one was quite toxic from the start, so by the time I left, I already got to radical acceptance. This time it was sudden and I was discarded. I still have trust issues and can't fully relax in other peoples presence.

[@jaea7262]

It’s a reason why you keep attracting these types of people. Something I recently realized about myself. So far it’s the lack of boundaries or sticking to them. Also being a people pleaser. Hopefully you won’t ever end up in another relationship with someone like them.

[@nickus51]

@@jaea7262 I know. I have been in therapy for about a year and a half now working on inner child healing and resolving what was hidden within that resulted in me attracting toxic people. I was raised in narcissistic and alcoholic family as a fixer and rescuer child. Naturally I developed people pleasing tendencies. Thank you though. I sincerely hope neither of uf has to go through such experience again.

[@nickus51]

@@jaea7262 Yeah I know. I have been to therapy for a bit less than year and a half now, doing inner child healing and working on my own wounds in order to change the pattern of attracting toxic people. Being raised in narcissistic and alcoholic home as a fixer and rescuer child definitely left consequences. That's why I grew up into people pleaser. I made quite a lot of progress already though.

[@nickus51]

​@@jaea7262 I know. It is true that we need to dive deep within us to discover the reason. I have been to therapy ever since, working on myself, healing my past wounds, my people pleasing tendencies, working on setting healthy boundaries etc. Growing up in narcissistic and alcoholic home as a fixer and rescuer child, no wonder I grew up like that.

[@christineshoemaker2727]

@nickus51 I am almost 42 years old. I've had relationships my entire life that have ended very respectfully. I had been single for 2 years when I met my narcissistic abuser. I ignored ALL the red flags. He had just "got out" of a relationship 2 weeks prior. I found out a month later he had still been seeing her. Overall, after an entire 7 months of off and on with him, he started pulling away. I didn't know why at the time. I went to hang out with friends one night and they hugged me so tight and said they were sorry. I didn't under why my friends were sorry... then they showed me the guy I was with changed his Facebook status to "in a relationship" with another person. I was.. am.. traumatized from the entire experience. Still working through my feelings and healing. The best advice I can give: do not ignore the red flags, and do not ignore your gut/intuition. I knew something wasn't right from day 1, and I made my choices over and over to ignore it. I accept my lesson. Don't be like me. Always honor yourself. ALWAYS.

[@ELSEYsaidHello]

Yes, you explained everything and you should make a video explaining going from a relationship to a roommate with a narcissist

[@sanjeevbains690]

They despise your inner light - although it attracted you to them in the first place

[@transitionsnc]

That's a great point.

[@karamason2340]

Did you mean to say although it attracted them to you in the first place?

[@LaMesaC]

I took it away when I left and divorcing my cheating narc abusive husband for DV and him discarding me over money. Controlling and deception. Removed my light, energy, healing, spiritual protection....EVERYTHING!! He lives with bad karma, juju..I have witnessed it and he knows it now. Fumbled me and paid the price. I've been separated for 6 months now and waiting for freedom. Learning about this from this video is eye-opening. The comments help me because I am a 1 st time bride in my late 40s and he was divorced but his history didn't line up. We met at work and he was attracted to my aura from a distance or was infatuated. Everyone that meets me are intrigued by my aura.

[@KarenMarie1111]

It attracted “them” to you!

[@donpapi9647]

They're insecure people, jealous and envious. They don't notice that that's what attracted them about you. Your knowledge, your good qualities but then they despise you for all the good they saw in you!

[@MoinKhan-x9d]

It took me a long time to realize how I was being manipulated and cheated and I finally put my foot down and didn't back down from setting boundaries but that only brought out the extreme anger from the narcissist who pretty much wanted me to shove everything under the rug and within weeks went from love bombing to extreme abuse that I have never experienced during the course of our marriage and all this while grooming the new supply in the background and eventually I went through with the divorced and within weeks the narcissist married someone who is already married to someone and has children. He was more of a convenient target who is unaware of the narcissist's toxic nature. I'm sure the mask will be coming off pretty soon as this person tends to have expiration date on relationships and friendships when things don't go in their favor.

[@Sherree57]

Karma is a BITCH. Karna is first name isabitch is the last name . God don't like ugly

[@samueleady7884]

I had never been called a narcissist by anyone except from my X fiancé. She had me convinced I was the problem. I wasn’t perfect by any means. I’m so glad I watched your video. Your video explains our five year relationship perfectly! You have no idea how much weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

[@angelacahill9460]

What's great about having the internet now, and social media, is that you can expose and broadcast the TRUTH about someone GLOBALLY.

[@as2223]

True, but liars and hate filled people use it too. Shoot the media monetizes hatred.

[@cupramen2632]

I was the rebound to a narcissist. I did not come out unscathed. I know people don't think highly of rebounds. I get it. But let me tell you something. If I had known he was on the rebound, I would have walked away. I had no idea at the time. I suffered just as much. If not, more.

[@koconutkirby4135]

Exactly In unfortunately we have a daughter together

[@as2223]

I had the same experience and fell in love with a very toxic woman, it made me toxic as well. I sorta lost myself for a while and prior to the relationship I was strong and healthy, my mind was on point, but boy it took a toll. Ironically I knew she wasn't for me at the very beginning and didn't listen to my gut. Her beauty and charm got me good. Never again! Now I'm back jack :) Took a while..

[@Liz-wz8dh]

This was helpful. It really explains why we need to normalize just leaving these people.

[@robwatkins587]

Thank you so much. I'm getting over a relationship with a narcissistic and I'm really struggling. This really helped put things into perspective for me.

[@antonia___vt]

You are amazing. I was struggling so much today. Sometimes I need a break from researching the Narcissist. But today I was starting to have that dueling mindset where I was trying to convince myself why I should miss the person and I’ve been miserable all day. I came home and stacked Wood and listed to, a bunch of your videos. Thank you so much.💗 thank you for reminding me.

[@Solossandy]

@@antonia___vt stacking wood sounds cathartic. I hope you’re doing okay.

[@antonia___vt]

@@Solossandy ✨💗✨One day at a time I am OK. Hope you are doing well ok too.

[@Solossandy]

@@antonia___vt I hear you. It really is a day at a time ❤️❤️‍🩹

[@landy952]

True, but also anxious attachment styles do this not only narcissist. People who suddenly feel abandoned, will jump into the first relationship that they can find in order to not deal with their feelings and be alone.

[@jdrumz321ify]

Yes, that was my last girlfriend. Jumped from relationship to relationship, and always seemed to monkey branch to the next guy. Got very jealous and insecure with me at times, even through I never gave her a reason to

[@alisabarrett5653]

I have an anxious attachment style, and I don't do this. I spent nearly four years single. Anxious attachment style doesn't mean we can't handle feeling our feelings. That's a separate thing that ppl who don't have coping skills or emotional maturity do.

[@timmy5948]

My ex wife did this during the separation with a younger man. I now healed and I'm living alone 1 year later. I visit my kids every weekend. She's now having problems with her young bf 6 months into their relationship. Unfortunately my kids are seeing this. I don't wish anything badly on their mother. I only hope she ultimately follows what I did and goes to therapy or counseling.

[@angelasauceda7548]

@9:17 why would anyone That is a great question! "Why would someone want to hurt me when I actually didn't do anything wrong? And most people who have been treated extremely poorly" You have great thoughts and insight. I love how well spoken you are.

[@GT-0524]

Crazy… yes, I was with one for 12 yrs. I let him get away without taking accountability, and that’s my fault for not even realizing that. When it all ends he said “it’s so easy to trick you” and this came from a man I trusted 100%.

[@nicholecornes1915]

Yes it hurts but BE HAPPY they moved on

[@wangcheng3940]

Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

[@paulinebricks3441]

its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back

[@wangcheng3940]

Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

[@paulinebricks3441]

Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

[@wangcheng3940]

Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

[@ahmedlago6651]

I’m in same situation, i feel ya pain

[@kingsofcobra]

It took me 10 months to finally sever ties with my narcissistic girlfriend. And Stephanie is so right. It will leave you feeling empty, confused, and mentally and emotionally drained. I had to walk away for my own mental and emotional health. It's sad because I really loved and cared about her.

[@SCCheaters]

same here brothaa

[@TNT.4Me]

I really don’t like that phrase “Hurt people, hurt other people” “Hurt people, should go to therapy “ 😂

[@Gigi0408]

Thank you👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@TNT.4Me]

@@Gigi0408You Are Welcome 😂

[@as2223]

Many don't for financial reasons and time. Unfortunately

[@Rett-qv7ti]

Highly recommend the book “Stop caretaking the borderline or narcissist, how to end the drama”

[@randiking5275]

Great video! So many of us can relate to this! Unfortunately. Very difficult but necessary to leave.

[@warchild100]

If they marry its money assets and status..

[@beentheredonethat-z5i]

That is so true. They definitely can't handle money and are looking for a lifestyle improvement that they can't achieve on their own.

[@L.RaeHoldt]

True

[@glicmathan1771]

You’re one of the best out there. I get so much help from these videos. Thank you!

[@StephanieLynCoaching]

I’m so glad!

[@Domorrigana]

It really was like he initially wanted me because I elevated his social status and made him feel important but after two years it was like he really wanted to tear me apart and tear me down, tell me I'm not anything worthy or good and it was almost like he was jealous of the way people notice me, not because he felt threatened by them or anything but because he wanted people to notice HIM.

[@susansanchez1629]

A million percent true! My heart too, goes out to the next victims. Truly heartbreaking.

[@paulohlsson27]

Hi Susan, how's your day going with you?

[@AKFit360]

My gosh, this is so true. Everything she’s saying is spot on accurate

[@Noah_Pender]

I did hold her accountable, but knowing she moved on so quickly still hurts. In fact she moved on so quickly she was already having an affair the second she said "I do" to me. I just want to feel like enough to someone, but need to realize no one is enough for her, she will suck everyone dry for the attention and admiration she desires and no one else really matters.

[@instagamrr]

I watch Dr Ramani a lot, and she helped me realize my ex was a narc. But with you, you’re saying the things that are helping it make logical sense so I can move on. God bless you girl! This is amazing. I just went NC yesterday and I’m struggling hard with the desire to reach out and I’m so glad I can just binge your videos!

[@sharbear6484]

Every word is spot on....I was discarded last yr...i left before and went bk a yr after so its the 2nd time around. Time to learn the lessons...its very hard to come to terms.

[@MARKIEBANUNCE]

Women are VERY MUCH like this It's not just men

[@ComradeFromRhody401]

Narcissism and anxious attachment trauma is genderless 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@Sevoflurane2014]

This was my ex. Had him lined up. One of her best friends told me she always had someone lined up when she left the relationship. I was a rebound but didn't know. But she told me I was her most healthy relationship yet she left me for a guy below me on EVERY level in life. So hurtful.

[@Noella-v9w]

The Narcissist is just greedy!! They see something they like and want it before someone else gets it. They don't care about anyone but themselves point period!!!!!😮😮😮😮‼️‼️‼️

[@lareelongtin5129]

Thank you, Stephanie, for all your help! I truly appreciate your insights and knowledge on this subject. 😊💕 To also know that it's really not me and I know what's really going on, with their little controlling tricks. I feel so much more in my own power!💪🏻😀😻💖✨️

[@jessee7334]

Sorry but it is you. Healthy ppl don't stay in toxic relationships. "Rather than getting mad at the elephant poop ask yourself why you keep going to the circus."

[@Diamondbeach]

Wow u are right in. My ex is just like what u describe. He was sooo bad. He gaslight, manipulated, lies so toxic I’m glad Ieft. Thank you.

[@MrTheKurgan]

You're an excellent communicator on this subject. Keep up the great work!

[@StephanieLynCoaching]

Thanks, will do!

[@ahmedlago6651]

Great content, i feel like you were in the room in my relationship , I should send this video to my ex smh , truly helped with clarity now , glad I came across this video, thank you

[@Fragglerock103]

I did watch this video when you first posted it. I’ve come back today to watch again. Yes 15 years and 4 children. Things aren’t perfect just yet but I’m feeling amazing and without a doubt couldn’t be in the place I am today without your information and support. You truly are an amazing woman and a gift sent from god. You are literally saving peoples lives! For me this is the best content you’ve produced and just made me feel complete. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@lisajohnston2803]

OMG I love you! Thank you for helping me clarify and understand and really look deep as to why I let this happen. You are spot on and I think the epiphany was not so much his behavior, it was why I put up with it and where it came from on my end! And to gain some understanding of why they behave the way they do. When I look back at what I do know about his upbringing and disfunction, his behavior actually makes sense. I will always be a huge fan!

[@MikeJackson690]

All very interesting. I found another video on narcissists helpful, too. As an empath it's so hurtful to be treated so badly.

[@Truth-matters-v2z]

Well they discard once that new “relationship” is established. He lied about the nature and timing the relationship, and also said “I don’t know if I want to be married anymore (27 yrs) and “I need to get you out of my head.” He was sleeping with her at my home (we were in a “trial separation” (narcissist term), not legally) she was also married still and within a few months he was complaining to others about her. 😂😂 You describe it well. I challenged him thinking I was helping him grow bc as you said he pointed out my flaws and I worked to correct them. I assumed we were a team, we had each others back (now realize he never did), we were just in a rough patch. It was all control and yet I still believed that my raising myself would improve our relationship but that’s when it began to deteriorate. And every time I said I was done, we can’t do this (we couldn’t parent together), etc he said “I’m Not going ti throw this all away”. Then he promptly threw it all away when he had new supply and he was no longer in need of all I provided since our youngest was graduating HS.

[@rosaliaoliver-qv3gr]

❤Thank for being so ❤wonderful ❤to us ,and helping us to understand where we standing with a narcissist .❤

[@BrandonDienar]

Just finished the video. This is an amazing piece of advice and really speaks to exactly my situation. Wow. So glad to hear others have gone through this but you’ve articulated exactly everything I’ve been living through for 2 years now. Amazing. Been reading, listening, trying to figure out some answers and you’ve hit the nail on the head. If you happen to do any online consultation, (I’m based in South Africa) I would gladly take you up on 30 mins to bring closure, Stephanie.

[@t.mckinney5859]

My god I can’t express how much I needed this. 12 years with my wife. Of begging and pleading to be close and intimate, of being heard. I’d try to leave and all of a sudden she could just turn on like a switch and give me what I needed for me to stay. I wanted it so badly and it never would last more than a week. So this last time I had reached a point I didn’t know how to recover from. I needed space to feel like me. So I didn’t fall for it. I honestly hoped the space would make her see how messed up the way she treated me was, give her some insight, heal. And just maybe we could come back together in ways we never could. Well I was wrong. Not even 2 months after she moved 1000 miles away- bought me a plane ticket and paid for our stay. We cried together, opened up together and I had felt closer to her then I ever had. I left that trip with hope in my heart that she did love me and she just needed that space too and I felt like our marriage would make it. Well, I found out that whole trip she was in a relationship with someone else. I lost it. So she drove here afraid she would lose me. Spent over a month with me telling me she loved me, wanted things to work, then lied more times then I could count talking to the other girl, playing the fence. Telling her she was here to get a divorce. I blew 4K in my savings while she was here supporting her trying to keep her entertained and happy. I begged her not to leave. She went back anyway but stating she would give 100 percent to me and our marriage and was only going for the money. I found out she created a new number from an app not even a week after she left asking that girl to talk to her in person. That was the last hit for me. She knew it. So she drove here to “surprise me” and has now been here for a month. She gets angry when I try to talk about things. Tells me it’s my fault for separating and I only wanted her when she got with someone else. Yet she wants to do couples therapy but we literally can’t talk through anything without her getting mad and shutting me out. To say my gut has felt wrenched, the endless tears, the not understanding how on earth she could do that if she loved me… this all is making sense to me. And for the first time in almost 3 months I feel a bit of relief. So thank you.

[@Paka96756]

Completely oblivious and hopeful for 25 years but last 4 before discard started to notice the cycle. In the last year I started to call her out on inconsistencies. 🤗😂 One year later after (now) discard, on the healing journey and think her and her boyfriend are perfect for each other. Just wish no kids were involved but the app My Family Wizard keep her at bay because it’s monitored 👌🏾 she still slips in things about the relationship even though she’s not supposed to, narcs don’t like rules. Thanks Stephanie for helping clear out the cobwebs 🤙🏽🙏🏾

[@lilkingg82]

I had a dream about my ex's rebound. Asking me advice after a breakup. It's so weird this video drops after that

[@TammBianc]

She may have thought about asking your advice. I wanted my ex narcissist ex to help me I often thought about it

[@andrewgilchrest3811]

You are so correct on this topic I feel like this topic was just for me stay prayed up sister ❤

[@dannyturczyn763]

Great video I saw the mask drop you're a very short period of time but not knowing exactly what a narcissist was and what to expect I just thought okay it's a new relationship all I have to give it time and see where it goes well that wasn't the best decision It lasted on and off for 2 years and the torment was bipolar and I actually thought that was the problem Until she left me and discarded me there was a buildup up devaluation disrespect and disappearing Acts which I would not tolerate I constantly made her accountable which she hated of course I told her it was over around Christmas and I haven't spoke to her since no contact works highly recommended No one needs to live with a person or be treated from a person like this They deserve to be alone and lonely The rest of the the world will be a better place Peace

[@sreach93]

Self awareness within a relationship is a very valuable trait to have. If they already had it prior to the breakup, they probably would still be in the relationship. If they somehow acquire it after the breakup through therapy or self analysis, you'd at least expect them to take ownership for their part, but don't hold your breath.

[@Godstutor]

Omg this is what I’m experiencing.

[@pattit7288]

This makes total and complete sense. You read him like a book

[@papitokuts1491]

Simply amazing how you nailed it right on the head! Ex monkey branched into a relationship when I caught her and figured out she was only bread crumbing me was for financial gain I cut her off she denied ever cheating even though I showed her the guys from Tinder. I went no contact cutting her off then she posted her new supply and served me with divorce papers and restraining orders because I caught her and she’s so upset i caught her 😌 seems like she was living her best life. Watching your video confirmed everything I already knew. The mask did come off I wish them well in the end I got my freedom and am healing with therapy and codependency classes made a huge difference in my healing process.

[@stephanieburgess8217]

She’s spot on 100% with regard to me and my ex, even currently. I couldn’t figure out why he’s coming back and wants a friendship so bad. Now I understand. He’s not getting something from her that he gets from me. Not sure what that is yet. I think she’s too agreeable and she won’t argue with him and I will argue points on certain topics.. but she just lets him roll her over like a steamroller.

[@sunshine92192]

This video has explained exactly what I've experienced over the past 5 years! I over looked red flags because I was emotionally invested and we had moved in together and just got engaged. Thank God I didn't marry him! But everything played out including him starting a relationship without ending ours. I felt something was off, my intuition was screaming and every time I would ask him he got defensive and said I was crazy or jealous, that was his "friend" he knew for a long time and blah blah. Well my intuition was right and everything I said turned out to be true. After 3 months he came back with a gift and crying saying how sorry he was and blah blah.. I decided to test him. I said I needed to see he was serious and that he wasn't going to turn around and go back to her. He swore up and down he wouldn't, even swore on his mom's grave 🫣 I was not giving him the attention he was used to or the affection, I was upset and crying and told him it was going to take a long long time to feel like I could trust him. I said betrayal trauma takes 1 - 3 years to get over, so he was in for a long ride. Barely 2 weeks later I caught him back at her house lol I already knew it once he thought about how long he'd have to be "good". Now he's the new victims problem. Of course it's still sad because I was healing and starting to feel like the trauma bond was broken, so of course that's when his radar went off and he had to show up at my door. But after this I don't think he'll be back. You never know with a narcissist, but I really let him have it and he is probably going to be hurt by narcissistic injury for a while. Who knows? He may try to come back to be vindictive and get back at me. Which I think is what he did the last time. I won't be opening the door ever again tho!!

[@ELSEYsaidHello]

You explained exactly what I’m going through accept we not together but he has a new supply a female co worker that he likes to spend time with but there not in a relationship, but she is like him

[@ComradeFromRhody401]

I bet you there’s more to it than you think 👀 emotional affairs are still cheating

[@lawrencelambert7414]

Find your work Very Valuable !!!

[@1980skevin]

Going through this exact situation. Absolutely crazy. You have described her perfectly. Wow. She is in that rebound relationship now. She is 50 years old and sleeping with a 28 year old coworker. What on earth? Absolute insanity.

[@oksanaschmidt8208]

You have so much light in your eyes 😮

[@shesnaturallydope6298]

Yup this happened to me in the past.I call the narcissist the walking dead.

[@LaMesaC]

Me too....same.

[@StefTechSurfer]

They want control at all times.

[@janefriel6895]

Just dont do it.Stay single. Its so empowering. I shall never trust another man ever again. Its absolutely fine to be single. Live life your way.

[@OneWhoKnowz]

We are not meant to be done. I’m sorry it was so painful. You let them win if u stay single.

[@janefriel6895]

@@OneWhoKnowz Oh god no.I didn't add im 61.I was married to a monster for 38 years. Im free 6 years and happy to be.Its different if you are young. I have my children, grandchildren and beautiful friends. My dog and until yesterday my rabbit. If he had been here i could not have grieved for my precious Bonnie. I can and did cry all day.I shall never be in a relationship again. My life,my way.

[@detayl13]

I’m single too and absolutely loving it. At first it was because I didn’t trust myself to know a good person. Now I 💯 trust myself and know how to be discerning about others. But I still love being single! I’m doing something that no narcissist can do- loving living alone. I can have friends but don’t need to compromise myself anymore.

[@aniakubica3201]

@@detayl13 Exactly my thoughts. At first (after a covert narcissist - my diagnose after many videos on YT) I had it in me to look to fill the void. Now I realised that it never felt better. I'm not going back. I can date, but only with someone who has similar situation to mine. Im not going to be maid, cook, nurse, mummy etc. to someone who doesn;t aprieciate it anymore.

[@ewljr]

Because you stayed with a monster for 38 years doesn’t mean you should trust any man ever again. You’re just hurting yourself and you’re allowing your ex to stop you from moving on

[@francineodonnell1700]

Thank you for this insight! Exactly what I needed to hear!!

[@jay-t8l4g]

The narc I knew just did it for a place to stay. Plain and simple. God bless the new guy trust me

[@ComradeFromRhody401]

That’s a Hobosexual 👀 🏚️

[@tinsheek]

I love you❤ thanks for all ur vids!💜

[@skyinverted]

Very helpful, especially to my current situation right now.

[@andrewgilchrest3811]

We love you too baby girl Memphis TN loving your energy ❤

[@Yosef_Maharat]

Thanks, Stephanie.

[@aprilvaughn9781]

Thank you so much ❤ well said Stephanie❤

[@johnstone3836]

I like this info an video Helpful an going to marinate on it! I feel my Best relationship is in front of me…

[@Tsharetrainer]

Thank you for this super accurate, precise explanation and advice to be better prepared🤛🙏🤜

[@peterklein4349]

good to see you're doing well. Much better than a few years ago

[@sanjeevbains690]

Not say anything or hold them accountable.. Yup

[@danielskyles6184]

Good word Stephanie!

[@lookupyourredemptiondrawsn7285]

This video was so empowering. Im going to watch it 20 times. Lol

[@rickykeller7069]

It’s called Love.Empathy,care.respect you name it

[@Zaberdutton]

11:30 - 11:45 This is spiritual. An aspect that modern society believes doesn't exist because they can't explain it. I know the bible isn't popular and even less so today but what she is describing here and why most people can't get a bead on it is because both parties are being influenced by spiritual forces. The narcissist by demonic forces to get you(most likely being guided by the holy spirit because you try to be a righteous person even when being tormented by an evil presence) to extinguish your own light and join the darkness like them. Keep fighting and for Christ's sake let them go! 2 Timothy 3:1-5

[@milesmatulionis]

Great video and insight. 👏

[@ChaiTogether]

Great to see your face 😍🤍

[@rachelo4138]

Is it possible that they broke up with you because they were scared you might break up with them? They were projecting onto you and got together with someone new to prove that you couldn't hurt them? A way to show their ex that they couldn't be hurt by them is to move on? I think it ties in to what you said about gradually realizing you have put them on a pedestal and starting to challenge them. They realize the game is up.

[@ComradeFromRhody401]

That’s just a narcissist with anxious attachment from all of their insecurities, which is at the root of all narcissism.

[@allans7281]

Your video’s is right on the money I went through a full cycle narcissist relationship for nine months, not knowing what it was. She became desperate and triangulated me as I was exiting Now that I’m educated on narcissism I know with the signs and traits are Enjoyed your video you’re super cute :)

[@LeeEverett1]

What you said around the 8 minute mark regarding narcs having something lined up first before leaving doesn't apply at all to female narcs. Female narcs know they won't have an issue replacing you because they can just download dating apps and get a new boyfriend within a couple weeks. She also has the orbitors she can always fall back on i.e coworkers, classmates, friends she told you not to worry about etc.

[@ComradeFromRhody401]

No, that goes for men as well. It’s all of the above.

[@bigdogdad99delrio21]

🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 Thank you going through divorce with my narcissistic soon to be ex-wife

[@roxy7255]

Another amazing video thank you

[@deb2319]

😂 laughing bc my ex started dating his exs -friends😂😂😂and wanted to keep me around. He was so lost i even tried to remain frienda to help him but he never stopped to do any shadow work. I TOTALLY LOVE THIS SMART TALK❤ Stephani🎉🎉 you are an awesome lady life coach🎉

[@johnnycalderon9951]

Crazyyy she actually said "i dont want to change!!" Wen i try to send her videos to watch. Then she always asked me why are u like this why even if we upset at each other you still there for me.

[@ComradeFromRhody401]

Mine refused to watch self-help videos and mocked them, and ridiculed me and scolded me for suggesting them. Like somehow, I was crazy for wanting him to better himself and our relationship. 🚩🚩🚩Good riddance!

[@OneWhoKnowz]

13:03 that’s exactly what it is and they are super insecure and I realize how insecure 😟 I was as well. Relationships are difficult. I’ve been single for a year and have been focused on myself and healing the things that have kept me in these unhealthy connections my entire life from 14-44 years old. 31 years of a bad marriage with many people I refuse to be unhappy again although I would like to have a healthy relationship one day! ❤

[@dennismitchell8507]

Thank you Stephanie

[@danscott2059]

This is spot-on!!--Excellent video...

[@murielsmyth]

Thanks a million Stephanie that was an amazing video and I felt it was meant for me.

[@SirenaSpades]

I think other disorders do this too, such as complex ptsd, for one. It may have to do with lack of security or childhood neglect.

[@TheHashBot]

This resonates with what I'm going through.

[@Astounded618]

Had situation where was with a woman who I saw somewhat frequently. Not regular sex but enough. She gambles, does drugs and lies constantly. She was seeing a drug dealer on the side of which I was not aware. Then devalue began but had not gotten to extreme. Caught her and then she started smear campaign. Cut off all contact three months ago and no reconnect. Hear she is still with him and all she does is gamble and take drugs.

[@lisalambert81865]

Do they really rebound? Cause usually they have one set up and ready to go, they overlap not rebound.

[@Sljdmartinez]

She was explaining that they can overlap as well, so it's kind of like a rebound. When you think about it, no matter how you slice it, these types of people are going to "do them". They're going to have a new person to replace you 5 minutes after the break-up or 5 minutes before because they it's like they HAVE to have someone all the time to feed that enormous ego of theirs. I remember someone I dated once telling me that about all of his exes and how much LOVED them. ALL of them. I was thinking everyone?! I've never loved every single person I've ever dated, that sounded a bit dramatic, but whatever, lol. Then he said that one girl lived with him for a little while & the morning that they broke up, while she was packing up her things and crying, he was texting another ex and asking if she could come over later that night. I was so disgusted and told him so. He was shocked by my reaction and honestly didn't see why that would be an issue. He said he kept in contact with all of his exes for that very reason - to have someone to fill in the time until he found someone else. Smh... Rebound or not, narcissists seem to be incapable of understanding what a real relationship is and how it works. I've noticed that most of them tend to have "friends" as backups - not regular friends that you or I would have.

[@ckl5801]

They are monsters

[@kaoshi_kutie]

@@Sljdmartinezhe sounds really unhealthy and codependent, unable to cope on his own. Definitely needs to do the work but unfortunately he won’t he will keep rotating Women trying to fill his void . Sad really

[@Sljdmartinez]

@kaoshi_kutie Yeah, it is. In the process of him doing this, he's hurting so many people and he seems to be completely oblivious or unbothered by it.

[@allthingsjana7870]

Yes kept catching him online until all hours before I was discarded. They are sick

[@michele7215]

It's more... Hurt people with unhealed trauma hurt people...