Neutrality Around Being Autistic

  Рет қаралды 1,161

Dana Andersen

Dana Andersen

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 30
@nozhki-busha
@nozhki-busha Күн бұрын
Yeah I hate it when people call it a superpower. Yeah, my powers are being clumbsy, socially awkward, anxious, overexplaining, and being slow to process things lol I think you strike a good balance, Dana. We are who we are and we just have to try our best :)
@daviniarobbins9298
@daviniarobbins9298 Күн бұрын
Not only am I autistic and maybes ADHD I am also asexual. When I tell people I am asexual a lot of the time they just say "oh, you just not met the right person yet." I really hate that. I feel no sexual attraction to anyone. There is no urgent urge to go out there and find a sexual partner I am just not interested but people do annoy me when they say that. I know they probably mean well though.
@underdogpsychosis2841
@underdogpsychosis2841 Күн бұрын
The shit that annoys me most is people always assuming you have ulterior motives when you ask questions literally and just out of curiosity. Apparently people that ain't on the spectrum don't say what they actually mean. It's all underhanded, devious bullshit. Also, I fucking hate that I always think my connection to people is much closer than what it inevitably turns out to be. But like you say, there's pros and cons to everything in life 🙌🏻
@khristopherlawrence7493
@khristopherlawrence7493 Күн бұрын
It's good to see you with more energy than in the previous video (your outfit and makeup were stunning btw). Being autistic has it's ups and downs like everything in life. I'm just grateful to understand why I could not be 'successful' at life, or at least have a bare minimum of what's expected. And what's expected is bullshit anyways.
@probsnooneyouknowtbh3712
@probsnooneyouknowtbh3712 Күн бұрын
100% agree with the idea that if I wasn't struggling with being neurodivergent, I would be struggling with something else. Everyone has struggles, this is just mine. I can't change it, so I have to accept it. And try to find happiness in life despite it. I think what I struggle with the most is how much this has delayed my becoming independent. We live in a society where food, shelter, and other basic necessities are locked behind a paywall, so you can either get and keep a job or you can die, basically. And the entire system puts neurodivergent people at an inherent disadvantage, unfortunately. I worry that my parents will die before I am able to support myself. Especially living in the US, where end-stage capitalism is getting to it's worst point. Sometimes it feels like I will forever be stuck at the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy, just struggling to attain safety. When people say to just be positive about it, I feel like that kind of ignores how being neurodivergent can actually be life-threatening in a system that's not even working for most neurotypicals anymore and is even worse for neurodivergent folks. At the same time, I do believe that I will somehow carve out a place for myself, in this world that doesn't seem to have one for me, and hopefully help others like me to do so along the way.
@MorganJ
@MorganJ Күн бұрын
I found this video to be cathartic. I kinda went down the whole be positive about everything route. It's hard to talk about but I'm a survivor of seclusion & restraint, and when I got out of that situation my healing or way of coping with that trauma was to become as happy and positive as possible. It's hard, and I'm trying to "unlearn" or "unpack" some of that mentality and "leave room" for the middle ground and the rest of the human experience. It's hard for me to be neutral but it's so nice to be able to hear from someone that it's an option. That it's okay to be that way.
@siddharthkrishna8463
@siddharthkrishna8463 Күн бұрын
The only big reason I'm glad I'm autistic is it allows me to be true to myself with fewer obstacles
@dawudallen
@dawudallen Күн бұрын
Always appreciate hearing your thought process. Very validating; its hard to articulate this stuff until you hear someone else say it sometimes.
@UnvisibleGirl
@UnvisibleGirl Күн бұрын
The only thing I feel bad about is not being able to create atm, thought that's a bit of both autism and adhd. I just want to create again T.T
@ookthomas
@ookthomas Күн бұрын
Is that a common thing for people with autism? Not being able to create?
@UnvisibleGirl
@UnvisibleGirl Күн бұрын
@@ookthomas On the austic side, I'm in autistic burnout, on the ADHD side I can't focus on one thing for too long and have poor regulation T.T
@harison548
@harison548 23 сағат бұрын
yr soo real. I appreciate your outlook.
@DiscordBeing
@DiscordBeing Күн бұрын
It has taken me a year to grieve being autistic as a late diagnosed person and I totally understand how much it limits me, BUT I would never want to be neurotypical. Never. They are so boring, they undershare, and their social relations are full of lying to each other. Yikes.
@gmlpc7132
@gmlpc7132 12 сағат бұрын
No-one can tell anyone how to feel and few things are worse in life than telling someone who is unhappy to "cheer up", "look on the bright side" or even worse "there's people worse off than you" or "be grateful for what you've got". The fact that others may have worse problems doesn't solve your problems. It is true that sometimes people can with some degree of success "reboot their mind" and come to some sort of peace with their situation. In many ways there is a lot to be depressed about in my life and I have had periods of depression but have avoided them in recent times because I've come to accept my limitations and that I will not achieve what others have done because I don't have the capabilities. I am more realistic about myself. To some degree discovering we have autism can have a similar impact as it explains so much of what has happened to us and what we can do rather than having unrealistic ideas that by just "trying harder" or adopting yet another new strategy we will transform our lives. For some of us these realisations lead to feeling better but for others they won't help. There's no magic solution but progress is possible.
@erikd4690
@erikd4690 18 сағат бұрын
Literally just got my official diagnosis today - yay! In my report, for some reason, they noted that at some point in the assessment, I described positive feelings "without specific language relating to those feelings, but rather as an absence of certain negative feelings." ...Yeah, neutrality is awesome, really. 😂
@DanaAndersen
@DanaAndersen 16 сағат бұрын
Congrats!! 🥳
@harison548
@harison548 22 сағат бұрын
yeah. just don't want to feel shitty.
@Jasmine-b9u4z
@Jasmine-b9u4z 9 сағат бұрын
With both normal and disabled people my frequent result has been people liking my unexpected calm reactions but choosing to not accept how unique they consider my interests. I've had very few people actually treat me with patience of how to get along. But I know big part of why I've rarely been hard on myself is because it has been since childhood that I've been able to look at personal responsibility calmly and let go of how other people see me. I have that unusual strength of saying no to a mean person while crying because emotional pain plus the unusual result of it only taking me a few minutes to calm down and making it through difficult situations with self-confidence.
@helenaskew4851
@helenaskew4851 Күн бұрын
Autism is not a super power. It has its moments. You try things, but you have to accept on what you can't do and do what can. Don't be hard onyourself as not good for your mental health.
@ratlinggull2223
@ratlinggull2223 21 сағат бұрын
Nooooo I'm proud of mine! I'll never be neutral about it!
@Wagdog
@Wagdog 10 сағат бұрын
For me being autistic is like being a foreigner in a land where I don’t speak the language. Everything is 10x harder and I never fit in. All I want is to get back to my homeland where I belong.
@johnbillings5260
@johnbillings5260 Күн бұрын
I was Dxed in February. I'm still trying to figure out how I feel about it - how it has affected the flow of life.
@laura.bseyoga
@laura.bseyoga 13 сағат бұрын
💚
@simonides3167
@simonides3167 5 сағат бұрын
Unusual accent for me (I'm Greek) Need to concentrate to understand. What is it? Northern it seems but not Manchester. You are absolutly right btw. Both positive and negatives we have. Negatives I think mostly when we mingle with NTs. Not sure why we bother tbh
@DanaAndersen
@DanaAndersen 5 сағат бұрын
I moved around a lot during my childhood and teen years, and have lived in Liverpool for the last decade, so it’s sort of…northern with a hint of scouse? I’ve not really been able to pin it myself tbh 😅
@simonides3167
@simonides3167 5 сағат бұрын
@@DanaAndersen I'll get the hang of it!
@Yuffie13
@Yuffie13 8 сағат бұрын
Neutrality makes a lot of sense, and I feel like that's where I'm at, too. And yeah, the "superpower" mindset pisses me off as well, as does the whole "autism is a different ability, not a disability!" attitude. Obviously it depends on who you ask (because lower support needs folks might not see themselves as disabled) but if autism weren't a disability, why do NTs love to go on about our "issues" and "deficits"? Why the "therapies" to try to make us neurotypical? I consider myself low support needs, but my mom seems to be weird about calling me "autistic". She'll say "neurodivergent", or "on the spectrum", but that just feels like her dancing around the word. At least she's stopped saying that "Asperger's should still be separate from autism" or "there are aspies who don't want to be called autistic", but that's only because I said, "They're literally the same thing," and gave her a well-meaning lecture about not talking like a eugenicist 🙃
@ChrisOhalloran-e3w
@ChrisOhalloran-e3w Күн бұрын
I often wonder why these conditions are part of our chemistry and biology who or what put them there perhaps there is no ryme or reason for it but then maybe there is
@hawaiianbabyrose
@hawaiianbabyrose Күн бұрын
this might come off as offensive to some idk, but the worst thing to feel to me is feeling like an NPC. i won't even elaborate on this one like i don't have the tim tbh, but it's the realest shit, and it's existentially lame so i'd better not live like that
@jakehollomon3676
@jakehollomon3676 Күн бұрын
This is very relatable. I've spent years grappling with my self-perceived shortcomings and failures - thinking I should've been a better this or a better that. Nowadays I've been more able able to say 'it is what it is' and carry on. It feels nice actyally
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