No Contact With Kids Together

Get Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit at myexbackcoach....
This video is about how to do no contact when you have kids with the person who broke up with you. See my more recent video about this topic at • No Contact Rule When Y...
If you have children with your ex but want to get back together with them, this video is for you.
Read the accompanying article to this video at myexbackcoach....
Videos mentioned in this video:
Why The No Contact Rule Works: • Why The No Contact Rul...
Stages Your Ex Goes Through During No Contact: • Stages Ex Goes Through...
How To Stop A Divorce: • How To Stop A Divorce
What Is Limerence? • What Is Limerence?
If you want your ex back, it's important that you give them the breakup they think they want without a fight, begging, clinging, and pursuing, but how do you do this if the two of you have children together?
Relationship strategist, Coach Lee, explains that if you have kids with your ex and have been dumped, you can't use complete no contact.
You will need to interact and be in contact with your ex as it relates to your children.
You should be police, casual, and respectful while implementing limited, smart contact.
You should not use your children as "middle men," to get in touch with your ex, thinking that the contact will ping them and somehow change things in your favor to where they suddenly want to get back together.
You must be smarter than that if you want your ex back.
Follow Coach Lee on Facebook at / leewilsonfanpage and on Instagram at / realcoachlee
Get Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit at myexbackcoach....
Read the accompanying article at myexbackcoach....

[@justinclark1182]

It's so brutal when you have kids. It becomes so confusing, so messy, so hard financially. For the individual and the kids. It's rotten

[@Peter-mo3pr]

Tell me about it. Three kids and my ex has just checked out after 14 years and 11 years marriage, no heads up or anything.

[@justinclark1182]

@@Peter-mo3pr same. 2 years in and she's gone forever

[@justinclark1182]

@@Peter-mo3pr They don't communicate bro. Let me know if you need any support

[@Peter-mo3pr]

@@justinclark1182 thanks bud. Me and my wife talk daily because we have three kids, but a switch has flipped for her and she's so cold now, I'm just going to follow the advice on here and see what happens mate. We will always have to talk and get on and I want that for the kids, I just hope she sees sense eventually and realises I brought something to the table. I left Friday and she already has paint to decorate, new microwave and kettle, it's like she's smashing life suddenly.

[@justinclark1182]

@@Peter-mo3pr it because she's been planning to for ages

[@jonathanthompson2317]

Could you do more videos involving the kids after no contact?

[@shained6]

Honestly I normally just watch videos like this on KZbin without commenting but I watched all coach lee video and followed all his advice and everything he explains are just so on point and honest. I’m now back with my ex ♥️

[@christheodorou4795]

Wow Shaine great news!

[@inserter400]

HI COACH CAN YOU PLEASE DO ANOTHER VIDEO OF NO CONTACT WERE KIDS ARE INVOLVED , THE SOUND ON THIS VIDEO ISNT VERY CLEAR

[@XtremeChiliPepper]

You are a good man. You need to keep going. KZbin is just ONE avenue, pursue them all. You are helping people, all of US, US that are out there that have no idea what to do. Thank you. It hurts every time. Man, wish you were around so long ago. New age, new times, but you are helping, and please don't stop.

[@noulafrantz8589]

If you gave up just because she's with someone else that's mean you want her back not your child

[@franklinwilliams294]

Yes true statement!!! I can live without her but couldn’t live without my children, they didn’t do anything to deserve this

[@kevinbond5950]

I always watch his videos for advice and he is spot on in everything he says and it gives me a boost aswell

[@monteciajones6034]

Thank you!! He's calling a lot more and brings up our relationship. I will say it gets a little confusing @ times. One minute he's all hard the next he wants to remain me of what we had!

[@Nashthekid]

How is it now?

[@monteciajones6034]

@@Nashthekid we are back together. It's still a work in progress, but what I will say is both parties have to be willing to say we have a problem! And come up with a solution together otherwise it's pointless. @Coach Lee really did help me! Even with us being back together, I use his tools to navigate through our relationship now.

[@annasrobloxchannel3816]

@@monteciajones6034 still together?

[@iGoist]

@@monteciajones6034 are you to together?

[@DarthViper]

I feel like if she was actually willing to give up 60% of her own child's life, and pay me $434 a month, and actually go through with it, then she has zero interest in coming back. 7 years gone. I will never understand.

[@MsJM0923]

He directly contacts his kids. He sent group messages through email. He tells us how his progress in losing weight. I replied to him, "Thank you for letting us know."

[@Rev_John_Danger]

Dang, that’s cold. He must have really hurt you.

[@MsJM0923]

@@Rev_John_Danger He's the one that left us, not us.

[@jjr7423]

Can you imagine how hard it would be to get broken up with by Coach Lee or someone else who specializes in this? Lol they'd know you're using NC and it would just be frustrating lol.

[@gmj132]

Could you do a video on possibilities of ex’s getting back together after years apart? I think your verdict on the topic would be really interesting to hear.

[@zuzu8284]

I’m also interested

[@abbeypropertycare8081]

me too.

[@TW-mb4mu]

interested

[@rahmahmugeere8217]

Thank you so much for this advice. My boys are a bit grown but they still need their father especially at the tender age. His advice matters a lot.

[@SuperSamsosa]

Very helpful, especially the part about not involving the kids. Btw, no contact already worked for my last girlfriend :)

[@atheistinalabama4206]

I've been married for 15yrs, my husband made it clear he wanted out a few weeks ago. We have a 12yr old daughter together & a 20yr old daughter from my previous marriage (ex husband pasted away 2yrs ago & my current husband has been in her life since she was 3). I'm lost, angry, hurt, broken, confused & damn near convinced that the last 18yrs of my life has been a lie!!! Even if my soon to be ex-husband ever wanted me back I don't think I could simply because of the betrayal I feel. Is this normal, will it change, is it a sign of something else or am I just another middle age woman who can't stand the thought of going through this lunacy again??? I really think there comes a time when u have to admit love in a long term relationship just isn't in the cards & it's best to bow out gracefully...... Am I right or wrong???

[@lindawells9328]

Coach Lee you seem like a life saver because you give so much good advice nomatter what a person is dealing with when it comes to relationships. Thank you . Miss . Linda ❤

[@shaunajohnson307]

When you do see each other and exchange. Is it good to act bubbly? I did do that this time and just talked, he ended up staying and hr, we mostly just talked about the kids, the trailer (I want to take the kids camping) etc nothing personal. I flirted a little, bit my lip and flipped my hair. Since, his walls has seemed to drop. He messaged me about calling his mom for Mother’s Day and thanked me. Missed his call for the kids (5th time he’s done it-1st time he’s texted me apologizing) He seems much happier now tho. More relaxed and even is talking to the kids more and doing more things with them. This is definitely good for my kids. (He also is starting to suspect I might be moving on with someone else) I’ve been out with friends lots and when talking to the kids I say lots of we, no he or she. A friend sent me flowers for Mother’s Day and it didn’t have a card, he questioned my 5 year old about them. But because of his happiness and his opening up to the kids away... could this be bad because he might be happier away from us now that there’s no tension around us?

[@shaunajohnson307]

Whose that

[@isabeaurobinson5413]

Hey shauna it’s been a long time but how did everything pan out with your baby daddy?

[@arthurchavez3916]

Thank you coach... Your videos help me greatly..we been separated for years have a child.. she recently had gotten a new boyfriend.. the issue is I'm hurt cause she strung me along four years without every having an adult talk about reconciliation.... Only thrashing each other back and forth.. she finally told me to get lost and now I'm watching your videos doing the no contact.. it's been 2 weeks since she told me she moved on and I'm going through a roller coaster of emotion.. i just feel we both could of done better by talking and fighting for each other.. cause i truly feel we love each other.. but I'm feeling the loss.

[@ferencmondik31]

Any update?

[@06clarka]

Coach, I've actually been looking at all different sorts of ways to deal with this rather unique situation, and if you have any advice and can use this specific problem to help others, it would be MUCH appreciated. A little over 2 years ago, I told my wife I wanted out of our relationship. Things hadn't been working for at least a year or so before that, and I had plenty of people telling me to leave (they claimed I was emotionally abused, etc.). With that "knowledge", I told her (while she was at least 5 months pregnant with our second child), and it devastated both of us... I stayed anyway, didn't bother to really "work" on things, and treated her as a friend rather than my spouse. Fast forward to about 4 months ago, when she had me take her to her parent's house, an hour away. The entire ride down there was nothing but tears from both of us, and the trip back, I didn't want to look in my mirrors because it hurt so bad. I still remember her and the kids crying as I left them there... About a month into her being there, I told her I wanted to work on things. Up until about 2 months ago, we were. There was an incident that I completely botched that likely caused the current rift, namely me losing my temper with her parents younger kids. I laid down ground rules, to prevent myself from causing that kind of pain between us and her family. About 2 weeks after that, she started talking to a guy, claimed "It's nothing serious, we're only friends." I treated it responsibly, as I knew that being jealous wouldn't accomplish anything good. The guy had the audacity to send me a friend request on Facebook. On a hunch, about 15 minutes after telling her about it and her apologizing, I looked on the internet to see if he had a record. Turns out.... He's got a few charges for drug possession, drug paraphernalia, a count of inciting panic.... And 2 counts of child endangerment. Confronting her on it, I told her she had horrible taste in men, apparently. Turns into a huge fight, but resolved that night. About 2 weeks ago, she tells me she's "officially" with him, and that she just wanted to let me know. Since I had been told previously that he had stopped talking to her about a week after me finding his record (during our youngest child's birthday party that she didn't want to go to), I was completely caught off guard. I've been having to contact her to talk to our children (4 and 2), and yesterday, she ended up telling me about some of the happenings of her life, minus the relationship (Thank whatever holy power there is...). I'm positive that I really only need to talk about the children, but if she continues to talk to me, as a "friend" or confidante, what EXACTLY should my next move be? I know from all I've learned, that I really just need to let her feel loss, that I've got the potential to move on, but what should I do if she "happens" to slip up like that again?

[@iGoist]

any update on your story?

[@06clarka]

@@iGoist Things got a bit worse after that. I maintained only talking to her for the kids and she kept trying to talk to me more and more, here and there. There were definitely times where she seemed like she'd want to talk and work things out, then the next day act like I was the SHITTIEST person on the planet. Long story cut WAY short, we hated each other for a while, she got cheated on by the guy she was seeing, we started talking like civilised people and finally came back together. Longest year of my life, feeling like I was on tenterhooks and just one wrong word away from kissing everything good bye. My advice? If you're in a similar situation, pay the MOST attention to your kids. Make it about them, not their other parent. Let space grow between you both and after a couple of months of that, slowly (emphasis on SLOWLY) start opening up about things. Treat them as if you're literally stating to date each other again. Don't push for anything physical until they approach you for that specific kind of intimacy. Be respectful, yet firm with new boundaries you've found/developed. And the biggest key? WORK ON YOURSELF AND BE OK WITH EATING AT YOUR TABLE ALONE! Only you know what you're worth and you do NOT need to cater to someone else on everything. Set boundaries, goals... Have your own hobbies, dreams and ambitions. Find yourself and have the best time you can, without allowing for dumb crap to clog your life up. Show that you're not afraid to be on your own and that you're working on being the best version of you that you want to be. It REALLY does speak louder then you can. (And don't tell them you've changed or that you're working on yourself... Do the work and it'll show.)

[@iGoist]

your story shocked me. I'm glad you found yourself in that period of time and grew. My family situation is similar and I see that I'm not the only one fighting with myself to become a better person. Hope your spouse will value You more than ever. Hope you are okey

[@mikem8475]

Just recently separated with my wife bc of my childhood trauma and some narc traits. Treated her like shit for years. After she left me i realized she was the best thing ive ever had in my life. We have two kids and it kills me not being there. But i messed up and im doing the no contact so she can relax. But its so hard Im trying to focus on my kids more than ever now. but in my mind I know shes better off with someone else. Lesson learned dont take your wife for granted. LOVE HER everyday even if your damn tired. LIFE is TOO SHORT!!

[@coadymcgarry1878]

Howd it work oit for you im in the exact same boaat 10 years together i have 2 kids i was selfish and didnt oay attention she fell out of love and left me and now im turning into the person she always wanted me to be but shes done

[@leonardluhi2310]

Nice video Coach Lee. Thanks for the Information. Pls do one for After No Contact and the mistakes ppl make.

[@andrewmalta3444]

Hey Coach! Just want to say in the first couple months of my break up, your videos had helped me out tremendously! That said, my ex broke up with me close to 8 months ago, immidiatly moving on to a guy she had been talking to at work, details don't really matter, I occasionally think about it, because who doesn't, but am over all doing well.. Beyond that however, she had me blocked on social media, though she remained friends with my family members online and I am also friends with her family as well online. My sister mentioned to me about a week ago that she had ran into my ex at a new job, as my sister was shopping and my niece had apparently ran up to my ex and hugged her. My sister happened to mention it to me, I later noticed that my ex had unblocked me (as being friends with her mom online, it shows me, I didn't go snooping around lol) She is still with the person she left me for however, but as my social media is set to private, I can't see why she would leave me unblocked, she gains nothing from it in the moment, and could easily see my account if she was curious by logging into her moms social media (which she sometimes does to play pranks on her mom) Any thoughs

[@ADayInTheLifeOfJames]

Bet it didn’t work out for her mate

[@hannahjoy3848]

I didn't even realize which ex I was wanting back before I've seen these.... of course its the one that has been gone for 2 years!

[@hannahowens1423]

This happened to me too!!!

[@capricornangel7957]

😂😂😂

[@mikeys12]

What happened during filming this audio blows 🤷🏻‍♂️

[@Cavibux]

Thank you very much for this video. I was waiting for you to address this matter. I have a 5yr old and I was wondering how to apply the no contact rule. After being with my ex for over 17 yrs it ain’t easy.

[@pnkkidd]

Cavibux how has your relationship been after 9 months? I have 3 kids with my ex and together for 25 years.

[@CarlosEbanks]

Jesus is the only thing that can fix you and your relationships

[@raythedodger]

My situation, my ex had a son I’m fond of. I have reached out 2times during the last 8 months asking to see him. She agreed and asked to be present ( seeing him at her sisters house is what I suggested). She is with someone new and introduced her son to him right away. After I found this out. I gave up on seeing her son. I won’t confuse the poor kid anymore.

[@XtremeChiliPepper]

Yeah, same here. Really, really sux. I have two grown children, now divorced, everyone is fine. Meeting women with children is really, truly, a tough challenge. 7 months with (ex), she had 10 yo, we got along great, now that's all gone. Just hoping all is ok there, and memories are good with me being there, that's all I can do right now.

[@noulafrantz8589]

Never give up on your kid

[@beldilorenzo1]

Please I need a video of No Contact when you work with your Ex! My ex and I work very closely together, we’re in the same department

[@thegracetofollow4194]

Good ideas and good information but however there are some people that you shouldn't even waste your time playing the no contact game with because all they want to do is rain insults and curse at you they have absolute no intentions of being mature in the break up situation. Hating on you and jealousy and being all bulegerant and won't take responsibility for their bad behavior trying to make people think that you have issues and mean while all along it was them that has being the trouble makers.

[@incensepeppermint5221]

Great video, what if my ex got a 3 year restraining order/barring order and blocks all communication between me and my 4 sons. It's 16 months since I spoke to my 4 son's. She set me up and planned for me to leave, claiming false domestic abuse, The judge had no mercy and she got what she wanted. I believe one of my son's was in hospital, I wasn't told. She got the house and kids and I must pay 500 euro per month. However as Elton John sings, I'm still standing.

[@docmediaMlambo]

How is it going now?

[@terrodar19]

You make my divorce look like the best ever lol…. So sorry for u. Keep up u got it

[@slate5490]

Your the best coach lee I've used your methods in the past and they worked ....sadly I have to work on my own issues (insecurities etc) but thx

[@genasoriano559]

I love your encouragement and your approach. I learned so much from it. I could resonate from it. Thank you so much for sharing it.

[@jhojanau2139]

Is okay for my kids father to text me every day to ask about the kids. ?? It gets annoying. Sometimes I feel like telling him that if he was going to miss him this much, he shouldn’t have left…

[@RealCoachLee]

Yes, just keep it about the kids and brief.

[@MS-ns4ki]

I do not want contact with my ex; I am suffering from PTSD. No one believes me, and now I am sick daily having to deal with this person.

[@SHADOWtech.-]

What about casual conversation throughout the day? Should you be a little distant but also still fun to talk to?

[@CynthiaAva]

My ex is very passive aggressive. Our teen daughter likes the three of us to do things together. During this pandemic, we would take walks, etc...but he was very connected to his phone...texting his new gf, making it very obvious. He even left the dinner table at his mom's house during Mother's Day dinner to facetime his girlfriend. He told our daughter what he was doing. It was very distressing and rude. I wanted to leave, but my daughter's aunt and grandmother convinced me to stay. He walked out of the house to continue to facetime with new gif who lives in Germany. Very rude and I was humiliated. This man does not care about me whatsoever. I'm done.

[@grittygoddess]

He’s a Narcissist.

[@Kelly-kf2ne]

Any updates Cynthia ?

[@CynthiaAva]

@@Kelly-kf2ne Yes, I am grateful to update that I have been narc-free since two years ago, by the grace of God. As far as I know, he is still recycling his supplies.

[@Kelly-kf2ne]

@@CynthiaAva i am happy for you !!

[@CarlosEbanks]

@@CynthiaAva give it to God and pray for him - strengthen your relationship with God

[@simonyt2237]

What if kids are on husband's side? My wife left me coz she's fed up with our arguements. I'm trying this no contact but she is asking to see the kids on weekends.

[@janna4726]

Dear Coach Lee, could you please make a video how to do no contact when you are in the middle of divorce but living together (separate bedrooms, big house- together until we reach agreement regarding finances- it's a court case, communicating through solicitors), no children involved. I see him every day and I don't know what to do during those times when I see him (kitchen, sitting room etc).

[@JMthdjhgbnjk]

He kept me sane. Good coach.

[@j.akingston2035]

Hey coach Lee! I don’t have kids with my ex but we do have a cat that we raised up from a kitten. Last week my ex reach out to me for the first time while I’ve been in no contact for about a month. At start is was “how are u?” I told her how I was in a positive way and then She was asking me my opinion of what sort of character she should be playing on her new show reel. I gave her my advice and she was very impressed. She sent my a pic of the our cat and told me what she is up too in her Career and will update me in due course. I’ve left it like that and have not chased. Recently I saw on her Instagram post of her and the new rebound saying. “Don’t pick someone u can be with but some one u can’t be with out”. By the way she doesn’t know I can see her Instagram post because she blocked me after the break up. I’m very confused. Why is she contact me even though she is in a rebound relationship?

[@RealCoachLee]

Probably because she doesn’t want you to get “too far away” in case she changes her mind. That’s a good sign. She’s trying to keep you close. Stay back and keep letting her come to you.

[@j.akingston2035]

Thanks Lee. U videos have been very helpful and I’ll try a book a session with u in the future especially when my Situation includes long distance. In the mean time I’ll just be Casual and upbeat with my ex if she continues to contact me and to only let her Initiate the contact.

[@rizalievillanueva4948]

Maybe we are in the same situation.. My husband do that the same.. He even tells me theres no getting back each other but in the process he is still coming back kissing and hug me.. Im confuse.. Why he is doing that to me.. He is in a rebound his woman is pregnant.. What should i do now..

[@docmediaMlambo]

How did it go, its been 3 years now...

[@jeffjordan5782]

What if u tell them u still love them an are still in love with them but u are done trying to get them back an done tryin to prove that u have changed an just done trying to win them back ?

[@fweshy274]

Unless i have a direct question or am asked about a direct question theres nothing to talk about. I dont care what they had for lunch, i dont care if they woke up three times in the night, i dont care if they watched the latest scooby doo. Nothing to talk about

[@kristinaabrio5754]

We are married for 18 years we have 1 child he cheated 3 months ago he stop his affair emmediately it happen only twice on the first 2 months he was very supportive with my recovery he was sorry and regret what he did. Recently he start having panic attack depression as time goes by his infidelity is no longer painful in my heart I accept that he cheated on me he lied to me. I’m worried about my husband he work almost 16 hours 3 or 4 times a week I know he is at work because every hour he called from his work. He said let me feel better and clean before we start a brand new marriage again he said I want to be clean before I will come back

[@Nolan-fz3co]

I was married for 20 yrs 2 kids. Had a very bad divorce, he tried to be friends I couldn't do it ..had very little contact with him..basically emails for 6 yrs...then last yr we got together talked things through and get together monthly for past yr. It's crazy but we were able to heal and we are getting along better now. The thing that's hard is...to not slip back into that comfortable mode that we once were in as a married couple. Is this a strange arrangement?

[@metalempire5274]

my ex gf 6 months pregnant ask me break up and she jumpt to another man..she told me she doesn't need me and my help and so on..its strange that she kept telling me that the baby is from me..but now i give her no contact since 2 months and she didn't reach out yet..but i believe the time will answer that she will crawling back to me again..

[@antoniomiguel1934]

I have two Kids with my ex and she dumped me after 10 year living together because she wanted us be in a open relationship which I didn’t accept.. I am currently with no contact with her unless it’s about the kids..it’s heartbroken when you love someone for real especial when you give her or work hard for your family. I have to say thank you for the best coach Lee who’s been guiding me throughout this mess.

[@anthonyfenech8423]

every word u just wrote is describing what im going through , its been three weeks now

[@gadgetsondeck43]

going through the same thing here 8 years with my ex, have two kids also, 6months since the break up, been quite a journey, rollercoaster of emotions, she's currently in a relationship don't know if it's a rebound / coping mechanism, however I'm not worried about that dude. although it's been 6months since the split have only done no contact properly since the start of the year, I think people that share kids we have a longer/ greater window of opportunity,

[@cosmickat5816]

My ex taken my kids and turned them against me. Now my kids are angry with me and don't want to no me and say who am I and what do I want. My ex is a nassasist. I'm heartbroken what should I do thankyou for your advice 🙏

[@abbeypropertycare8081]

coach lee do you have any videos on how to get your ex back after years of seperation .

[@gematriawithjen28]

My sons not heard from their dad since 10 years now.ive tried to gey in touch but nothing. My eldest is 15 and youngest is 13. It's so sad. My sons deserves a father

[@jeffstone7912]

Do not bad mouth ex to the kids. Don’t talk about the ex to the kids.

[@sarahmeadows2866]

We have No contact but he didn't even show up for his son when he was very sick hurt my kid. He didn't even show up for his surgery. I don't want him back. I just wish he was a better Dad

[@castaway123100]

We needs more videos about me who have a child with a narc ex 's and these women are stalking him and his new wife. I feel he should go no contact and allow the ex girfriend narc raise their child without him.

[@lilianamarques8242]

Married 13 years, 2 kids... he up and decided he wants a divorce. I found out he's already in a rebound relationship. I'm afraid he'll grow closer to her while we're in no contact. What do I do??

[@cesarmerino3421]

How can you even make this work. When they cheated while separation many times and they don't feel nothing for you

[@Ana-ld7zw]

I am also confused on an apology. We had an argument. He was verbally and emotionally attacking. I defended myself which only angered him more. He became avoidant and then said he was breaking up with me. Is an apology needed? At what point you recommend I do that fi so?

[@malisajosiah6446]

How to get your ex love back to you. If he's attracted to someone else

[@yuliyaboitsova2611]

What if these are your step kids? You have no legal right to them, but you have been married for 9 years and been there since kids were so little to the point where they don’t recall the time before you? My 11 year old step son does not have a phone. How to I show my SS I am still there for him?

[@yuliyaboitsova2611]

My husband just called (I’m am giving him space) to tell me how upset his son was when he saw my stuff and dog gone. He also got in trouble at school for acting out. I love my step son and it breaks my heart that he is hurting. He does not have his own phone. I am not sure how to handle this.

[@hannahjoy3848]

You're my favorite coach!

[@That_Guy_JL]

Tbh coach, you make me tough man 😞 it’s so hard. Thank you.

[@mr.hemlock1900]

My ex left me a month ago. We have a 2 year daughter. I've been reduced to a hotel dad. She and my daughter moved to get closer to the bum she left me for. So now I have to travel to see my daughter and get hotel rooms. Our baby asks me when I video chat her, when am I coming home. Breaks my heart. Left me for her middle school boyfriend that she just reconnected with at the end of December. Now they are "In love". He's some cook at a bar, supposedly separated from his wife and their two kids. Such a clown show.

[@tonymorph3672]

How did it turn out bro? I’m in pretty much the exact situation as you although it’s just happened. This guy has been in her dms and she says he’s such a great person and understands and cares about her etc. I let things slip and he has obviously taken the opportunity. I am hoping it’s just a rebound and he will get bored now the sneaking around and txts have finished. Hopefully reality will be different especially as we have a 2 year old. Anyway sorry for rambling. Hope things are going better for you now a bit further down the line.

[@c_yt1]

hiCoach, would you mind putting out more videos about NC w children? ty so much

[@victor9101]

My dad and sister got into a feud in late 2016 and they were not on speaking terms for 2 years or more. I was in the middle of it trying to get both parties to come back together because I realize the damage that a daughter not having her father figure present would do to her. For several months before she reached out I was told by my younger sister that she wanted to reach out but had nothing to say and was afraid of what would happen. My younger sister contacted my step mother instead of my dad and she arranged a dinner with everyone there which would include both of them. After that point no contact was broken. My dad is dyed in the wool avoidant attachment style but I could tell that he was glad to see her and everything. Their relationship is not the best now but they are on speaking terms and what I wanted to do (Bring them back into contact without interfering with their actual problems because they are adults who can figure that out for themselves) was ultimately successful but on my younger sisters terms. So long story short no contact works between parents and children too.

[@valeriecontreras4427]

My ex broke up with me a couple of days ago, and at first i was seemingly desperate and needy and persuading him to come back to me. We had a pretty decent relationship, we were happy, and you can tell he loved me. As soon as summer hit, he became a little more distant and said he wanted some space to figure himself out, and theres a possibility we could have something in the future. And im gonna follow your advice coach lee and begin no contact today. We were together for a year and a half but he just needs to realize how much he misses me. Meanwhile I will grow as a person.

[@robertcooper1525]

I have 2 children with my ex and she is now talking to someone who is not what she normally goes after, (5ft 7 350 lb guy 10 years older than her) I do really want her back should I keep trying? We have been split up for a while and I've been trying for quite some time it feels and just came across your videos and I am starting to compliment these, could it still work? She still comes over and hangs out, she asks if I want to go out to eat with her and the children, etc. A few weeks ago she was laying in bed with me and leaned over and kissed my cheek but now she doesnt want like any physical contact, I'm getting alot of mixed signals

[@robertfrosch2903]

My ex girlfriend of a week has 2 children that are not mine. I miss them so much, she is away on business, the kids are staying with the nanny. We don't live together

[@earthtolylah]

Coach Lee, you are awesome!

[@Sleezy.Design]

Hey Coach can you do another in depth video on radio silence? Because there‘s only this one video by yourself on entire youtube on radio silence, disappearing completely from social media. I‘d really like to know more about the psychological effects it can have on your ex. I noticed when I went absent for a couple of weeks my ex created a fake instagram profile and followed a bunch of girls I follow. But she won‘t reach out yet

[@grandelious]

This is a crazy one. We're in an LDR for 7months going on 8 and she broke with me cuz i kept making the mistake of liking, sharing, and following instagram and facebook hoes and she felt insecure and uncomfortable and disrespected. She came back after me begging. a week later she left again, then she came back because i wasnt mentioning anything and giving her a good time and sweet talking her. She left cuz i annoyed her and she kept thinking about what i did says she can never get over it. We're supposed to meet July 26th and she says she doesnt becasue she doesnt want me to try anything with her. Please help me with this one.

[@dudeduedate5020]

Is there an estimate to when you would be able to take calls again?

[@Antillon010]

It’s been 1 year, go for it 👍🏼

[@MantraEdits15]

Would it be appropriate after you talked about business related items such as taxes and ask them “Tell me what you’ve been up to the last few days?” Or is that only going to push them away?

[@thesignal3458]

Coach Lee, I've been putting my kids first and doing the smart contact roughly a month. Even after she got in a new relationship. We were together 10+ yrs with a rough last year in the relationship. Ive been civil Now I believe she's in limerence because he's now her soulmate. My question is how do compete with her friends who are in her ear telling her to work through new love interest? And is smart contact giving away to much power in her court?

[@mianrowan]

I'm doing original no contact so far 18 days that I haven't seen my kids but like you said I think smart contact won't make her miss me enough. Small sacrifice to pay 30 days without my kids for hopefully a lifetime of being together

[@jesseowoko6816]

@@mianrowan how did things turn out?

[@teezo2917]

How’d it go

[@mattseymour6298]

My ex has a child but he's not mine. He has treated me like his father for a long time though, several years now. What should I do in this situation?

[@brzzesasuke]

Same thing I'm here for. My ex's daughter pretty much the same. She calls me dad and lived with me for 4years up until now. And I'm kinda sad when I started no contact. Im on day 5

[@franciscomacias4908]

@Coach Lee plz please schedule a call with me I have been trying to go on your page,and it says it's full please!

[@015cn]

I can’t even book a call with him for some reason

[@franciscomacias4908]

@@015cn that's weird man but I found a page that has coaches & is really good. Its 49$ u.s dollars a session which is like 1 hour and a half

[@eleseclarke6038]

I broke up with him now I miss him and he says he doesn't want me will the no contact work if I was the dumper I've made the mistake of begging and stuff also we have a 16 month old together

[@Paranfc]

House kids dogs.. Still live together but not married. Whenever I tried limited contact... she makes conversation but is also adamant there's nothing left for me romantically. 6 years not sure how that's possible.. so would like to try no contact to spark a reaction

[@abbeypropertycare8081]

I have a 6 year old son with my ex and she ask me to go to the beach with her and my son , should I continue to keep my distance or should I go with her and my son ?

[@AAmed1980]

Coach Lee I understand that the spouse I am separated from and in no communication with might try to reach out, but how do I distinguish between communications that are genuinely about reaching out to me about our relationship, and those that are strictly business and related to our daughter? What sort of communication should I look out for? I cant imagine it would be something obvious.

[@petecoventry6858]

Yes I often get this mis signal in person or on video calls it is very confusing. I guess Steering her back to the kids is all you can do

[@AAmed1980]

@@petecoventry6858 Yes, thank you...

[@davegregory791]

Here is a question, what do you guys and gals think I should do? I wrote this to myself so if it sounds off, that is why. So you have to see her throughout the week. Before and after school and at church, at least for now she said she wants that. That will make no contact hard and you have to keep it about the kids and be civil, mature and polite. When we do go to church all together just be nice and calm and don't argue. I'm worried that she'll look at all of this as a we're better this way, things are better now with us not being together, see I told you so type situation. And I don't know how to handle that, because that is not the plan nor agenda. Do I stop going to church as a family throughout this? Will it help be distant? I think it would help but also hurt. On one hand it shows I care and want to be a family but also doesn't allow for space and time. It does show I can be civil and put aside everything for my kids. But it also allows her to see in some way we're better off as we are, things are nicer this way with us being single, there is no complications now. I guess you have to ask around now and figure this out because it is hard. She did say at first yesterday that she wanted to be a family without a title. I still don't grasp what that exactly meant. It sounds more like an excuse to tell someone else ya know? Like oh if you see us together at church or whatever it's only for the kids to know they're loved by both of us and there is no hard feelings. Almost an excuse to tell some new guy or family and friends. Am I over thinking this and making it more complicated?

[@mianrowan]

Im still gonna do no contact for 30 and just not see my kids for 30 days just a small sacrifice to pay to help me get myself together

[@bryanutterback4074]

Yeah feel you

[@malaslittleworld]

I moved way too fast after I did no contact. Which resulted in her telling me she isn't ready and doesn't want a relationship. What's my next move? Do I go back to no contact?

[@malaslittleworld]

@@RealCoachLee should I wait for her to initiate?

[@lilstowell]

Hi! Is there a coach that you recommend while you are on break from coaching?

[@chrishoward3204]

Can you do more videos were you don’t want ex back I think if that’s on your mind it’s a totally different mind set

[@raojeshj4426]

My 17 year old son is with my wife who has left me three months back. I never got to speak to my son after she left and she told me that he doesn’t wish to talk to me. He has also blocked me on WhatsApp. My son’s birthday is due on the 10th of May. I do not all her or message her to discuss anything personal. However, we speak once in a while regarding property matters that we wish to dispose. Do you think I should message and ask her if I could talk to him for few mins on his birthday?

[@danarose627]

We don’t have children but my ex is asking to come see the dogs. I have agreed to let him come over this coming Sunday but I’m feeling so anxious about whether it’s a good idea or not. Should I approach this similar to the way you approach having children in your video? Thank you

[@sircloud9923]

For some reason I can't book you and I really need you at the moment.

[@gabriellepilgrim5155]

What if the kid is only from one of the two in the relationship but they were apart of the kids life for 5 yrs?

[@eustaceforbes537]

I have weaned on my no contact....and we are at a stage where u dont know if she wants to go up or down...she says she wants time. Is it too late after about 6 months of sublte conversations tryin the no contact rule. Mind u this is on the heels of infidelity and a baby

[@corylapointe94]

Entered no contact a month ago with my ex of 4 yrs. I have 3 kids she has 1. We never lived together. She just reached out and wants to be in my kids lives. Attend their sports ect. I said absolutely. Is this a sign she's re considering in some way the relationship???

[@mirayap4923]

Hello everyone,I just need some advice. My ex for 10yrs left for another girl whos half his age. 2 weeks after they met,he already told me he wants his freedom and that he did not really love me and it was only for our child thats why he stayed. Hes a completely different person now. Its 3months and he cant even visit our child or initiate to contact her. Its always my child(9yr old) who always contact him first to tell him she miss him and that he wants to see him. I have no contact to him for 2months already. But the first month,i did terrible things like contacting his new gf and tried to beg him to stay for only 1day. Now,im confused if I should stop our daughter to contact her dad since he seems distant and not interested to contact our daughter. Please give me some advice, for myself I am a bit okay without him but it hurts me when I see my daughter reaching out to him all the time.Thank you in advance.

[@tygaines6239]

Coach Lee I am on day 3 of no contact, when should my ex/SO start to look at my posts and or instagram stories? She hasn’t since we decided to take a break.

[@AlbanianPerson]

My ex broke up two month with me for nothing she set i lost feelings god make this to us we have two kids together kids wanted to stay with me anyone have same situation?

[@hanslowes5294]

Can you do a video about an ex-wife blocking communication with the father to his children or specific time out of the court order?

[@RealCoachLee]

I talk about that some in the Emergency Marriage Kit at myexbackcoach.com/emk but the short answer is that you need to get a lawyer immediately. Men, especially, will sometimes be tricked into not making an effort to see their kids and then the mother will take him to court claiming that a presidence has been setup of the kids not seeing the father and then they will try to blame you for that. Trust me. GET A LAWYER yesterday and fight to see your kids or it WILL be used against you. That's what her lawyer will do even if she doesn't want to. Trust me. It's not attractive for a woman to defeat you and legally walk all over you. Fight for yourself and your right to see the kids and THEN after that is taken care of, you can work on potentially getting back together.

[@shawnahines9195]

Coach Lee How does the no contact rule apply when my ex is the one who cut off contact with me he moved back to Texas with his parents hes dad was rude to me when I texted calling me the n-word and his mom annoying my texts and I don't have his phone number so if I wanted to call or text him I couldn't

[@OmarGarcia-ch9dk]

Have you tried social media?

[@helenastanier6585]

What if they want to hang out together but don't say they miss you or talk about the relationship. This is happening to me at the moment

[@slapicek]

So it has been 2,5 months since she broke up with me after a 6 year relationship. There weren´t any bad words or arguments after. I did some begging however, then did the NC, during which I picked loads of new interests, lost weight, started exercising and looking after myself. I also started posting on Insta and FB. I tried reaching out and I tried the "sorry" message, however I was met with a negative outcome either way. Through a mutual friend I learned she is on a hate spree supported by her friends because of the interesting things I do and post (I am not posting everything, like 2 posts a week). I mean "Sorry I am breathing babe". Look I do still care about her, but this behavior is seriously hurting me, considering I have never spoken ill of her. Do you think it is a good thing,? Because she didn´t block me anywhere and she does watch all of my posts. There is also a concert we bought tickets to coming up in two weeks (tickets are in my name), so I am expecting her to contact me because of it. Do you think I should tell her "Sorry, but I dont want to go with her" ?

[@chrislugaila452]

What if its the second break up? Do i still have a chance?

[@donnybeardjr.9118]

What about an ex is stalking and I'm doing no contact and the kids don't want anything to do with their mom also she's using drugs. When I was in contact with her she always was hateful and won't listen about boundaries and she was always talking bad to the kids about me plus when she was around she was always mean to the kids so now what to do?

[@444LAAH]

I hear you on the part where you say attend parties and be mature but depending on the other "type" of parent for ex a narcissistic, victim parent or resentful parent that finds that time to bring up past things of you instead of focusing on having a nice cordial day at event. Some people focus on continuing to inflict pain because they're still in pain with other parent and sometimes inflict pain on the child and put them in the middle of it. What's your take on that?

[@ChanChan-jk8pc]

Dude I swear I went to her to sit down and talk about parenting plan and she used the time to constantly insult me and bring up past bullshit. Her pride will not let her say sorry or say she made a mistake

[@petecoventry6858]

This video is old and I might have come here before but we have split for the 4th time and she says she is going to take her time and move on - it hurts man and I will watch the video but I don't think it will help me this time. I was the Dumper this time

[@WelcomeToOzzy]

Wait,… you assume I want to come back with them.. what about if you have kids and you need no contact and not getting back with them?

[@LilacMoonKittenn]

I know youve done videos on rebounds but what if the the person he is seeing now was his friend? Is it more likely to last? Im doing NC but honestly feeling like i need to accept that its done for good.

[@RealCoachLee]

There’s too many factors to know. It depends on the quality of your relationship with him, what their friendship was like, etc. Your best bet is still no contact. Follow me on Instagram @RealCoachLee

[@ashleighmcmurray6654]

This has happened to me 😔 curious to know the outcome of your situation I feel so hopeless right now trying to do all the right things to get him back especially since we have kids but because of his friend I don’t see how we could any advice would be great x

[@LilacMoonKittenn]

@@ashleighmcmurray6654 hi i stayed in no contact because he was dating her. But he eventually reached out and i got a lot of mixed signals he would reach out and then disappear. Now im doing no contact again because he says us talking is making him feel "uneasy" honestly it hurt but not as bad just acceptes whats meant to be will be x3 i wish you luck though and i suggest staying/doing NC while he is still with her :)

[@ashleighmcmurray6654]

@skittykitten thanks for your reply I’m currently doing no contact apart from things relating to the kids we’d been on really good terms before I found out about her, it’s just hard to still have hope but like you said what will be will be, they really know how to screw with your head! Good luck to you too I hope it works out the best for you x

[@loz.o2126]

My daughters 16 months old me and her mum septerated 2 weeks ago it's breaking my heart not being around my kid everyday like I was , I just want us to be a family again we spoke today about our daughter but I'm now doing no contact , I just want my family back 😭 what do I do 😭

[@mikeodegai2885]

What if child(5 yrs old) doesnt hv a phone and u want to reach out but not through your ex(the mother)?