Nobody Likes You, Kormir [Guild Wars]

[@videotroll72]

and this is why charr have no gods

[@ninja_sloth3906]

Got 99 problems but theism aint one.

[@tombrown407]

They did have to outsource killing them to humans though. Twice.

[@ZdzichuRaczka]

The charr gods are only not "livinoid", if thats clear for you - they worship iron, strengh and shadows as their gods... So they have a gods, simple enough :> .

[@howtodoge]

@@ZdzichuRaczka They canonically had 'gods'... The flame legion worshipped the champions of Abaddon, and the searing of Ascalon was brought about as a result of that worship and magical study.. And as a direct gift. They did have gods in the Guild Wars 1 era, a millennia prior to the events of Guild Wars 2. They don't have 'gods' now because all their worship brought about was torment, heartache and pain.. Just like humankinds' worship of their gods in Tyria. wiki.guildwars.com/wiki/Charr wiki.guildwars2.com/wiki/Charr

[@Zekent]

@@ZdzichuRaczka No, and dont even try to distort it again :>

[@KarvalyInteractive]

"I am the only sane person in this universe." - Every RPG ever.

[@VinniHP]

even the mmos

[@Dojan5]

It's hardly true though. We free Palawa Joko and then when we have an opportunity to beat him down before he regains enough of his power to become a threat, we're all "Nah! Word's a word!" and proceed to ignore him. The only sane person in Nightfall is Zhed Shadowhoof who calls us out on our stupidity.

[@bobthet-rex2718]

Yup

[@GeneralAblon]

You mean every game period? There are escort missions in other game types too.

[@ValdVincent]

Yeah, minus Tyranny. Kotor I feel the PC is kinda dump, fallout 3's guy might not be sane. But yeah most NPCs are insane in RPG wen you look at it.

[@MentalParadox]

That final imagine of Kormir rising to to the heavens, giving us mortals the finger. That's exactly what happens in PoF...

[@nunyabizniz4556]

Its almost as if Anet tracks gw2 memes.

[@TheGreatWerebear]

f o r e s h a d o w i n g

[@toastwalrus]

It's funny because one of the few times kormir actually attacks or does things is during a mission where one of the bonuses is to NOT KILL THE GHOSTS

[@riacharda]

That's so true! Kormir's useless!

[@chillmaster66]

This was so annoying. Especially because said ghosts even were deceased sunspeers. Jeez. Bitch got much respect for the passed soldiers. But it get's even better. Kormir kills every player character in the tutorial mission to show of the respawn shrine mechanics. She killed all of us before we could finish the first mission.

[@AlastairAryn]

oh my god please make a new one called "nobody still likes you kormir" for path of fire

[@rhettorical]

Never played GW1 but my brief interaction with Kormir makes me not like her. I already didn't like any of the gods but Kormir sticking around long enough to flip you off and say "gl cleaning up our mess with Balth and Dhuum" is enough to make me want her to die.

[@Xukti]

@@rhettorical Just die? She caused countless deaths by awaking Abbadon and not telling anyone about this.

[@WaifuPunisher]

Its been 2 years and your prayer has not been answered!

[@AnthanKrufix]

@@WaifuPunisher Original creator of this doesn't play GW2 so can't.

[@mikec1222]

@@rhettorical She basically does the same thing in Path of Fire. Albeit with the justification that the gods actually trying to put in an effort is what caused the Crystal crap to begin with, but ultimately ending it with "yeah this is your problem, kbye"

[@renataseptiani2597]

Lady Kasmeer Meade: Goddess Kormir. We have come to you seeking guidance and aid in dark times. Will you hear our plea? Kormir: Rise, Lady Meade. Kormir: Please, continue. Lady Kasmeer Meade: Balthazar has emerged from the Mists to bring ruin to Tyria. He's going to slay Kralkatorrik, and if he succeeds, the imbalance it brings could... Lady Kasmeer Meade: You...you know all of this already, don't you? Kormir: Indeed. Lady Kasmeer Meade: We cannot defeat him on our own. For the sake of Tyria, Goddess Kormir, please-we beg your aid. Kormir: Pfffttt... fuck off! A________A

[@miguelcondadoolivar5149]

The Commander should have killed Kormir right on the spot.

[@Anubis1101]

Kormir: "well, when abbadon died, a lot of people died in the resulting catastrophe. we cant risk that again" Kasmeer+player: "y-yea, and a lot more will die if balthazar manages to kill kralkatorrik. also i read your journal in the hidden room. why did you say our world was doomed?" Kormir: ".....oh look at the time, i must be off"

[@ChubbsRN]

It's been years and years since I played GW, but I will NEVER forgot how much I hated Kormir

[@MrVlad12340]

I met her only once in GW2 and i already hate her. Human Gods sucks.

[@bobthet-rex2718]

Only good God is Balthazar and he keeps trying to kill us

[@Andreithelord]

I like Grenth myself. He's a cool bro. He likes justice and morals and agrees to necromancy and undeath. He also has a weird skull thing for a head. But he is as morally upright as they get

[@CostlessJet]

Next to Captain Suicide, I mean Prince Rurik

[@williamebel4763]

4 years later... I still FUCKING HATE HER!!! (R.I.P. my dervish reworked to be just another trash warrior...)

[@ssjvoldemort]

i dont understand the hate for trahearne, he actually attacks the enemy's and doesnt make you have to go through even more trouble, which kormir does

[@ZiggyWhiskerz]

I like treatment trahearne. I was very very sad.... Ehem... At the end.

[@Canukles]

My problem was if you're not a tree person, and don't level in that zone, you have zero idea who he is until he joins the merging plot and all of the sudden shows up, and everyone decides this baby with monotone is in charge. I guess as plant you at least have a little context but he's still boring. Timely reply I know.

[@its_amarysso]

@@Canukles a little less timely. but yeah, playing a sylvari you learn his purpose for becoming the marshal of the pact

[@WillianBusch]

It's also pretty sad that his wild hunt and "turning the land into green" took a very different turn in HoT.

[@TiroDvD]

@@Canukles I disagree. Zero experience with Guild Wars. Started as asura, chose Priory. Game clearly introduces him as the best expert on Orr and he's going to be in charge. This makes perfect sense since I'm just this guy who joins an already established organization with an existing war against Zhaitan. I guess all other MMOs or games always have you as the Chosen One for *everything*.

[@KycooRM]

Do you know whats great? the GW2 reddit community STILL has this linked once a week. some meme's never die.

[@iceravennevermore]

March 2019, someone linked this at r/Guildwars2

[@FrancoRossel]

April 2019. Linked again.

[@ReapTheWhirlwind]

Someone referenced it in a thread today and I just had to watch it again. It's a classic at this point.

[@darschpugs4690]

@@ReapTheWhirlwind same, today

[@nicolasreveck7701]

September 2019

[@fodxp]

I'm sensing some unresolved hostilities directed at a certain NPC.

[@unfluencedarea]

This sums Nightfall up a little too well.

[@annoyingkuriboh]

"Hi there, I'm Lyssa" That whole speech kills me everytime.

[@michram]

Lyssen xD

[@Airyllish]

I'm coming back here in 2017, during the Guild Wars 2 Path of Fire experience, to say that Kormir has not been improved with an expansion or with two hundred and fifty years. Actually, she might have gotten worse.

[@jeremywright9511]

AiryLuff she is still a piece of shit.

[@tanaselaurentiu4262]

I really thought we will see Lyssa instead of her but okay

[@bensaine3523]

If only Koss had become a god instead. We could have gone to the God of Gangstas for help instead of the Goddess of Failure.

[@skryreprototype1826]

Daily reminder that Abaddon did nothing wrong and is still the best god.

[@Anubis1101]

she just stuck around to say "haha wow this place is fucked. see you later fuckers" again.

[@1mirovera144]

Omg, history repeats itself

[@HimeDelia]

Kormir did 9/11.

[@Anubis1101]

right? and during the library scene all i could think of was this video

[@kasolsataso3637]

250 years later, Kormir is still useless....

[@zer8540]

Her attitude in the library "sorry I can't help you, you have to do it yourself! :) I must go. Byeeee" made me frustrated

[@LooneyClipse]

She just fkn jumped in hell to get a prolonged vacation as a god. Amazing.

[@Anyposs]

"STOP BEING BLIND" --I lost it.

[@DaviSilva-im6tl]

I never played GW1, so I was a bit confused to see kormir with eyes, so I was ''maybe not the same character?''. As the animation went on, and I saw the arrogance and stupid actions I was realising ''yep, thats kormir right there" The fact that she gives humanity the middle finger in PoF, much to Kasmeer disapointment, is a testament to how well this animation here was made

[@ThePatriotConspirasy]

I don't care how many times I watch this, it's still funny every time. ...and sadly too true

[@GoingMenthol]

Kormir, goddess of kill stealing.

[@Radical_Rainbow]

I am now bummed that Koss didn't become the God of Truth.

[@bobthet-rex2718]

Never played Gw1 but Koss seems awesome

[@Andreithelord]

Koss is cool

[@chillmaster66]

Koss is the black dynamite of elona. He would have been the god of awesomeness and truth. There wouldn't have been a choice of which god blessed the human characters. Everybody would worship Koss.

[@TiroDvD]

@Iam awaterbottle Koss is Boss.

[@miguelcondadoolivar5149]

Well, he now fights alongside other heroes... You know? Doing stuff unlike SOME GODDESS I KNOW!

[@Kuulpb]

During PoF story I kept chanting "It's me booooooooois kormiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiir" and GUESS WHAT

[@jahpolley]

Koss would've been a better god.

[@IchCharacter]

#NotmyGod for Komir.

[@PlagueOfGripes]

I recall being forced to level up to 20 in the Crystal Desert before being booted to Droknar's, where max AL armor waited me for pocket change. On alts I usually just bought 15k, it was so easy. Assuming you already had the gold for a Drok's run, it took about a day to fully outfit yourself. Then you spent the rest of your time collecting skills, capturing elites and goofing off. Since the point was never hitting max level, on your character or your gear. A shame there're no MMOs like that.

[@ruisnt35]

This makes even more sense after Path of Fire campaign

[@robertkarinen3143]

But your the oens who made Balthazar evil in the first place. Too bad your problem. See ya later fuckers

[@michram]

yeah, cos this meme was confirmed xD

[@Snillomator]

After playing the recent demo it turns out she actually meant it when she said she wasn't going to answer peoples prayers. You had Elonians praying to Kormir to help them right before they got murdered...

[@humanLucifer]

imagine a world where koss had become a god.

[@ejesus95]

It would be fun, i can only imagine a god hanging out with the Commander Just for lols.

[@geraldsoria1764]

Well with the expansion out another 5 million people hate her now

[@dukedarkwood2098]

In the new Living Story map, there is a book in one library called "How Kormir Did It". I choose to believe it is the novelization of this video.

[@FrancoRossel]

PATH OF FIRE SPOILERS: Kormir is still fucking useless.

[@michram]

She is Kormir and she is pretty :)

[@Vidiri]

This should be called "Guild Wars: Nightfall - A summary" because it fits it perfectly

[@henriblack8673]

Does anybody else compulsively watch this video every time somebody mentions Kormir in game?

[@Kortanofull]

of course. I randomly log in gw story, see kormir and I am like "ooooo look at me! I am kormir. I think i am so pretty!" and she does nothing like usual xD

[@Cykelpump33]

Rurik had the guts to stand above the king and lead the ascalons across ascalon and shiverpeaks to tyria. Why isn't he worshipped then?

[@LegendaryMythril]

+Albion 1977 kormir had the decency of not failing missions with her stupidity. that's more than you could ask of rurik.

[@Cykelpump33]

LegendaryMythril But still...

[@MentalParadox]

That's because she just stood around and let you do all the work. If you don't try, you can't fail!

[@LouSaydus]

WHY THE FUCK DO PEOPLE CALL THEM ASCALONS?!?! THEY ARE FUCKING ASCALONIANS YOU GOD DAMN ILLITERATE CUNTS! Thats like calling chinese people chinas it just doesnt make any fucking sense god damn it i cant take it anymore.

[@Cykelpump33]

LouSaydus Who da hell cares. Ascalon is not even a country anymore, just a wasteland.

[@Maethendias]

the revelancy of this is hilarious

[@vidmuncher]

"LETS DO THIS! KORMIR!" *helicopters into battle*

[@minimmats]

Hero does the work - Kormir takes the credit. Seems legit!

[@NightWeredragon]

MinimMats Trahearne is the same in GW2... from one point he basically "hijacks" your personal story, and for certain path for Sylvari characters, even sooner. Takes all the credit, and then asks you basically "Oh, Commander (your character) i am afraid the pact leaders do not like me - do something!"

[@minimmats]

NightWeredragon Yuuuup. About right.

[@DystopianCreativity]

+NightWeredragon At least he is a bit less random if you're a sylvari.

[@minimmats]

DystopianCreativity At least you see it coming then XD

[@Scow2]

The only problem I had with Trahearne is the Concordia mission. That's the ONLY mission where he takes credit for your accomplishments, and it felt forced For the most part, he's handling logistics and looking at available options for the approach on Orr. Had it not been for That One Mission, I think he'd have been liked a bit more.

[@endorianki]

Kormir in GW2: oh mortals want help? better make something up quick.... uhh....the answer is...uh.fuckin'.... within you. yeh. also, keep being cute kasmeer, thanks for worshipping me. peace

[@yyangcn]

200 yrs later, Komir and the gods as useless as usual.

[@miguelcondadoolivar5149]

Not all... Balthazar at least tried to... What do you mean "stripped of his godhood"? Nevermind, then.

[@emmettbryant5611]

You have wrapped up the nightfall story in three minutes, Three hilarious minutes xD

[@Catherine-uj4vq]

If you ever need life advice… think: “what would Kormir do?”… and then… do the exact opposite

[@tiokronor]

LMAO, Koss the boss. This brings back so many memories.

[@PlagueOfGripes]

To clarify for future people: I'm one of the people who quit, way back on November 13th, 2012, and have not played since. I was actually preparing a Trehearne version of this video in early November, right before they revealed their intention to abandon GW1 sensibilities, but I dropped the project shortly thereafter. I won't be doing anything Guild Wars related in the future. Just letting you guys know, as I see comments in my inbox asking sometimes.

[@davidbritt5020]

I never played Guild Wars 1, what sensibility did they abandon that made you quit?

[@kitten8766]

A shaaaaaaaaaame, we would still like it!

[@KungKras]

@@davidbritt5020 The amount of choice and strategy that the GW1 skill system had is one thing I can think of.

[@WelfareWaifu]

@@davidbritt5020 Sorry it's been a year since you asked this but most likely when they announced Ascended gear; going back on their promise of never adding a gear treadmill and the resulting backlash is why we don't have anything higher since then.

[@Novalight2550]

PoF Spoilers: She fucks off and leaves us to clean up the gods' mess.

[@Jontman42]

"There is nothing I can do", says goddess Kormir as the actual apocalypse is happening.

[@dnazrael]

"I am the only sane person in this universe." THIS. This summarizes my experience in Nightfall.

[@max72590]

Funny in the latest expansion of GW2 they kept Kormir and the rest of the gods equally useless as shown in this video XD

[@krisztian6159]

max72590 yeah lmao he is some kind of prophet

[@PressA2Die]

At least Balthazar tried.

[@PlagueOfGripes]

My first tip off was during the alpha builds, they tried to include potions you had to buy to refill your energy bar, and they tried to spin it as a positive. Everything after that was slowly trying to rationalize things getting worse and worse.

[@tromboner98]

This is still one of my favorite KZbin videos ever made, and I quote it almost daily.

[@Novumic]

Now back to today's time Kormir: I got to leave so I can't help you no more. Commander: 1:10

[@TuscanSota]

I will never stop watching this

[@Tooshkit]

"Stop being blind" I see what you did there

[@gr33dl0cknein3]

10 years later nobody STILL doesn't like Kormir!

[@Jascosaurus]

we going north, TO VABBI!!

[@xFukairix]

Timely response but whenever i'm leaving a map to go to vabbi for some reason or other I post this on map chat

[@grimreape513]

Five years later and this still deserves a sequel due to the bullshit that happened this expac.

[@ceomyr]

This needs to be a regular thing. I love coming back to this and reliving how messed up (and awesome) this story could be in parts.

[@PainIsComing]

2:20 the dance easter egg :D

[@averyzucco220]

"Good luck with Balthazar! Seeya later fuckas!"

[@Morgru]

Did she literally say that? Sorry, I haven't reached that part yet lol...

[@michram]

Nope, she said that the gods are useless and Balthazar wanted to be useful for once and it didn't go well. :D

[@ReapTheWhirlwind]

I wish there were prequel videos about the awesome "fun" of escorting Rurik, Mhenlo, and Togo. ^_^ The Player Character reminds me of one of my friends at a typical D&D table. Everyone is nuts except for him and yet he always manages to die first.

[@Andreithelord]

I bet what happened to Balthazar is Kormir's fault. She probably annoyed him too much.

[@Ywhre]

I've seen this first time years ago. Last month I finally managed to beat Nightfall. It hits different now.

[@MentalParadox]

Anyone else re-watching this thanks to Path of Fire coming out? South, to Vabbi!

[@loganlaw4932]

Plague, they brought Kormir back and did it again in Path of Fire.

[@renataseptiani2597]

(Guild Wars 2 Path of Fire SPOILER) 300 year later... she never change...

[@1urie1]

"See you later fuckers" ...and she did it again...

[@Ravengm]

I've started using "See ya later, fuckas!" often ever since watching this for the first time.

[@iceball1557]

And this is why I helped the villan

[@maccy66]

Then she proceeds to aid in pissing off Balthazar, turning him against everyone and fucks off saying it's our problem, i recommend this video to anyone who needs a brief overview on lore for path of fire

[@JosipL91]

THIS IS RELEVANT AGAIN!

[@Basteal]

Never played guild wars? No idea who these characters are? Doesn't matter if Plague does the animation.

[@joeschmoe2843]

Guess what? History repeats itself. Path of Fire...rip.

[@DarklinWolf]

SHE CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT!

[@SapphireH]

This... is the best tutorial video ever! You completely 100% captured everything important about Elona, Nightfall, Varesh and Kormir! Not to mention the fact that I laughed my ass off throughout it! WELL DONE!!!!

[@MithranArkanere]

This was hilarious. But remember that being a god is not fun and games. It's like being a 24/7 government worker, having to work all time for all eternity in ALL POSSIBLE DIMENSIONS. So... I'd rather have her becoming the god, I'll keep adventuring.

[@TuomasErno]

This video is one of the best things that's ever happened! It has enriched my life and I literally quote it EVERY day! Please, please make one for Gwen!

[@PlagueOfGripes]

I remember that review. He made it about a month after release, or so. The most dramatic changes were made in November, about two or three months after release. He was correct, for the most part, when he made it. A lot of new players also don't run into the large amount of problems, as a good portion of them only concern the endgame, or things you won't notice right away.

[@tathtath]

i come back to this vid like lassie... love it so much :D

[@tathtath]

still good in 2021 ;]. You should do Guild Wars 2 story too :D

[@Zonedragon]

Still waiting for a part 2 as she F's off again in the path of fire campaign in gw2

[@justice_1337]

lol when she smacks player character on the head with a broom ;-)

[@muzdravmachaka3647]

well they had to clean up...there was still Mallyx the unyelding, who's plan was to kill Kormir and become a god himself... Kormir didn't even show up..

[@Morgru]

...and someone during 250 years time-skip managed to ice him once and for all lol...that's why the Revenant can call upon his powers straight from the Mist.

[@valczir]

This (and odd consistency issues in Abbadon's backstory which allowed me to come up with a theory that makes him seem like the only good god) is why our guild's backstory has us following Abaddon.

[@chainsburg]

This is so funny and amazing WOW Thank you so much for making this !

[@mattyTCG]

Thank you for this, when people start to wonder about the Kormir hate - i'm sending them straight here!

[@timothybuckley6960]

I don't know who I hated more- Kormir or Togo. A Ray of Judgement spell, run! Togo, "Ill go dance in it"

[@scarocci7333]

At least Togo heal you

[@TirOrah]

Upon replaying all the campaigns, I actually found Togo to be rather pleasant. Sure he has AI issues like all of the mentor characters, but he gives it his best shot in battles and he works hard alongside you to stop the villain. Which is more than I can say for Mhenlo, whose contributions mostly revolve around all of the women he somehow knows...

[@timothybuckley6960]

@@TirOrah I was a little harsh on him, Kormir though was completely useless

[@TirOrah]

@Timothy Buckley Agreed! Kormir barely even helped, except in the one mission where you have to leave some enemies alive... I noticed her the most when her model was blocking me...

[@timothybuckley6960]

@@TirOrah I loved the overall story of Nightfall but not the writing of Kormir, that video captures it all, Jeremy Soule composed such an awesome soundtrack in all the Campaigns

[@ReapTheWhirlwind]

Sometimes I have a "let's go to hell and kill Satan" moment in a game and I come back to watch this. Cuz fuck Kormir! 😂

[@Hartefact]

This is amazing. Seriously. This needs -all-the fame. In fact, reddit needs this.

[@dmastermanga]

Well, at least Joko saved Koss from permanent death. Koss should release a new book on his series "Koss on Koss" and include the script of this animation as a prequel to his books.

[@vessbear5187]

This is still the best video ever

[@HRNNNGH]

Also, people need to realize that gameplay wise she didn't do anything because they wanted to prevent all the griping that came with essential NPCs dying (like Mhenlo and Togo) as happened in Factions. They had to make her invincible, but to compensate for that they also had to make her not attack so that players wouldn't find ways to exploit her invincibility. They finally got their shit together in EoTN and allowed essential NPCs to die and just rez when there were no more enemies around.

[@jamesmarlowe7694]

I have not even played Guild Wars and this is still hilarious.

[@ZiggyWhiskerz]

Norn spirits are WAAAAAAY > (and better) than the human "gods"..... Lawd. And just so you guys know... This is a perfect synopsis of the Nightfall campaign. Lol Honestly, the player character shouldve gotten "godhood"... Lol

[@Zekent]

I really wish we get an expansion on gw2 to beat all human gods

[@SupraSav]

I wish you did one with Taimi, that useless rat. Getting her out of her suit was a harder fight than killing balthazar!

[@jasper2650]

Thank you for this! I've always been wondering why there's so much hate for Kormir... xD Also, epic animation!

[@PlagueOfGripes]

Originally I was going to have her kick a baby that was in her way to power, but thought killing a grown human would be more PC.

[@athaskins]

this was awesome, thank you for posting this.

[@PlagueOfGripes]

Because I wouldn't want to ruin Palawa in this mockery of a video.

[@MrAlexanderLang]

Kool-Aid near Kormir statue explains everything.

[@vida1530]

If you could do this for Braham. I. I hate him.

[@WingedGlider]

Relevant again!

[@repewill7950]

I liked Kormir, she was a bit clueless but overall she was ok. Only thing that pissed me off was when she became a god instead of me. That' was like ... wtf. I did the work, I should be the god.

[@agentcdb]

The ending is way too good.

[@KazpinGaming]

5 years later - she still won't do anything for you. [spoiler]

[@AlmostASurvivor]

Please make more. This was absolutely hilarious