What If I Date Her Hoping She Converts To Orthodoxy?

[@annazoemusic]

All glory to God, it worked for me! My husband was raised RC, but attended church with me, was open to Orthodoxy, and he supported raising our children Orthodox. It took 8 years of marriage for him to finally convert. Our marriage is SO much better because of it. I still support the belief that one should only marry another Orthodox though!

[@mihaimarinescu88]

To anyone reading this: please be very careful whom you date. Don't ever think that "you have it under control". Lot's of Orthodox men nowadays are very desperate, hence they jump headfirst in very unfruitful relationships and end up marrying the wrong person. Trust me, I'm speaking from my own experience. Don't let desperation cloud your judgement, don't act at the behest of the passions. Certainly don't start dating someone out of desperation, when you are depressed or when fueled by the passions. The best advice I've heard: do the works of God, go to church, visit elderly or children's homes, give alms, be that which God desires you to be and He will take care of the secondary things in your life. If you follow worldly advice and just take for yourself what you want, it will turn out bad. Also: don't trust anyone based on what they say, but on what they actually do. It is easy for anyone to say they are Orthodox, but do they actually follow the practices of the Church?

[@Dlee-eo5vv]

I love a priest who speaks truth without varnish.

[@vrhovnipredstojnik7650]

HI! I became Orthodox at my 45, after having two children! God bless you all, have faith, Jesus will save you!

[@TranslatedAssumption]

I know somebody who grew up with a Greek Orthodox father and a Latin Catholic mother. They grew up nominally orthodox and when they reached their adult years they fully embraced Catholicism to the point to where they started a pseudo-orthodox ecumenist religious community that has led countless people astray to include some Orthodox. I think it is good to not only consider the impact that having a mixed faith relationship might have in your life but also in the lives of any children that you might have as a result of that relationship.

[@Joshualbatross]

I'm having a hard enough time trying to be Orthodox, and I actually WANT to be. I can't imagine trying to convince someone who's not even looking for it.

[@AJ0223]

To be fair.... I think literally everyone in the world is looking for it, many just have scales in their eyes.

[@starstray4326]

Exactly

[@missnthrop5763]

​@@AJ0223Moses is a good example that many folks are not looking at all, or how about Saul anyone??😅 He was actively persecuting folks...some seek, some do not. Thanks for His Mercy where doors are opened to know Him.

[@miguelgarzon6475]

@@AJ0223 I think that's a bit a daring statement to make. I would have to disagree...

[@AJ0223]

@@miguelgarzon6475 why

[@acekoala457]

It didn't work for me. And the things she did to me are unspeakable just because I held my ground in my faith.

[@acekoala457]

I'm now in a position where even trying doesn't seem fair to anyone involved. I'm going to move closer to a Parish, and away from where I grew up, and try to learn obedience at the nearby Monastery so when I have my debts paid off I can start exploring joining a Monastery as a Novice.

[@purpleelemental3955]

@@acekoala457 maybe you should try to find an already orthodox girlfriend and marry her. Procreation is a very important commandment that you shouldn't give up so easy. Don't let the wordly things and infidel people decide instead of you which path you are going through. God bless you

[@acekoala457]

@@purpleelemental3955 It would not be fair to whoever I am yoked with if I tried to get married. I'm too messed up.

[@purpleelemental3955]

@@acekoala457 work on yourself then, my friend. Have a patience and a good luck. However I don't think that it is easier for a 'messed-up' person to become a Christ's frontline warrior, for the monk people are far more disciplined and responsible being married with a Church itself

[@LadyMaria]

​@@purpleelemental3955Procreation is important but not for everyone, even when married.

[@gavinweyant5777]

Trying to test out the waters with this nondenom girl I work with. I was raised in the same background (Baptist/nondenom) and am hopefully entering the church this next January, but I would not want to get into a relationship with this girl if she full on refused to hear me out. But so far she hasn’t objected, and under the supervision of my spiritual father I plan to do works of love so I can live out the gospel and have it so deeply engraved on my heart that she’ll see the fruits of orthodoxy. Most Protestants think that it’s just manmade traditions that are dead and useless, but I forgive them because they don’t KNOW what orthodoxy is. It’s a completely different worldview, approach to salvation, etc. and when you finally understand it it will strike you at your core. So please pray for me to discern this and pray for her to have an open mind while I do my best to live like the saints. I know I’m going to fail but through God’s grace I will get back up again. Pray for me brothers and sisters☦️❤️

[@benwien83]

What happened?

[@Georgia-d3o]

I knew a Greek Orthodox Woman who was engaged to a Catholic man. They were already fighting over what the children would be. This should’ve been a big red flag instead they chose to ignore this (& other disagreements about their faiths) thinking in marriage the issues would be dissolved. They went ahead with their marriage and the mess that followed was immense.

[@MartyRodriguezOrthodoxMarine]

My Fiance Bought Herself An Orthodox ☦️ Necklace And Told Me She Wants To Follow Her Husband To Be In The Byzantine Rite Eastern Orthodox Catholic and Apostolic Christian Faith, So, Having Spoken To My Parish Priest, Father Anthony Douglas Perkins of Christ The Saviour [ Antiochian] Orthodox Church ☦️ ⛪️ Here In My Hometown of Anderson ( Anderson County), South Carolina. What Suprised Me The Most Was When She Said She Wanted To Do What Was Right For God Almighty, For Her Husband-to-Be ( Yours Truly), and Any Future Children We Have Together. I Thank God Almighty In The Highest, In The Name of The Father and of The Son and of The Holy Spirit, She Wants To Be Eastern Orthodox Catholic and Apostolic Christian Like Me. AXIOS ☦️ ‼️ ☦️ ‼️

[@LadyMaria]

Glory to God! ☦︎ My husband was LDS Mormon when we were married almost 10 years ago and I was nothing really except open to Roman Catholicism. Thank God we converted to Holy Orthodoxy together!

[@MartyRodriguezOrthodoxMarine]

@LadyMaria : It's Truly Amazing Thing That We Have A Faith In Our Beloved King and Lord Jesus Christ That Two People Can Come Together In One Faith and Allegiance To The Same, And Be All In All For God Almighty. AXIOS ☦️ ‼️

[@GimbalLocksOnly]

☦︎

[@DChristina]

Congratulations ❤️Praise God!

[@Anakinskinwalker1]

Awesome to see another orthodox Christian in South Carolina, I’m only about 45 minutes away from Anderson.

[@fotiniioannidis3375]

Everything is fine and dandy if you're a lukewarm Orthodox Christian, as I was before I was married! But if you are serious about your faith, do not do it. Because eventually when your whole life and being starts to revolve around Christ, you must make a choice between standing your ground or compromising (the latter of which will leave you feeling sad, bitter, unhappy and unfulfilled). It also leaves the door open to temptations. Alternatively, you have to be prepared to patiently wait and pray for your partner's conversion (which may never happen) and live your orthodox life in a very solitary, lonely manner, whilst battling all the daily challenges and clashes, of which I can assure you there will be many! Since your whole life will become about God. Its such a heavy cross to bear... Someone who's serious about God always chooses God first, which puts so much pressure on the relationship that few can withstand it, and the marriage ultimately breaks up. Of course there are exceptions, and its a wonderful outcome for both parties. Of course God works through people to save souls... But this really is in God's hands, not ours. Its hard enough saving ourselves! And there as so many serious risks, affecting everyone involved, sometimes permanently! Consulting with your spiritual father on such a serious decision is wise, as he'll be able to discern if its viable based on your unique circumstances.

[@bezagebremedhine5102]

Thank you ♥️

[@ismaelsilveira2316]

"I can fix her" Orthodox edition

[@barkobunga2276]

Quick answer: DONT DO IT. Been there. It doesn't work.

[@OrthoFireCrusader]

One experience does not annul every other experience. If the Father and the Church logic say do then who are you to say don’t

[@firstnamelastname2197]

@@OrthoFireCrusader he's not to say absolutely don't, but the Father did not say "do" exactly. it's not a wise path

[@elainapoochie2734]

Maybe Father Peter should also start a dating site for Orthodox singles 😅

[@themistafi]

Good idea or just attend church, you never know maybe you will come across your future spouse.

[@be4593]

This is a really good idea. Please Fr. Peter consider this.

[@natasadojcinovic9522]

I hope so. I am from Serbia and wanna find some Orthodox guy.

[@aaronberroteran7868]

Specially because there are few orthodox in some places

[@aaronberroteran7868]

You know, like America in general

[@hodgepodge5901]

My wife and I converted to Orthodoxy together. It would be extremely difficult if we were not united about it.

[@orthodox1717]

Tried to court a non Orthodox who seemed to have an interest in Orthodoxy. She knew my faith came first. At the end of the day, it did not work. It was short lived. Unless God puts a heterodox in front of me and it’s clearly obvious it’s his will to pursue her, I definitely feel it’s best for me to marry someone who is already Orthodox.

[@peterantonoglou2601]

I fell into the sin of fornication with a woman, who is now my wife, resulting in her becoming pregnant with our first son. She was willing to become baptized and to marry me in the Orthodox church. She is supportive of my faith and not against it, but she herself does not seem to know where she stands. She supports me raising our three children in the Orthodox faith, and by the grace of God, they love our church. She prepares fasting food for me on Wednesdays, Fridays, and lent, but she herself does not fast. She rarely attends church with us. My wife comes from a single parent household, where her mother was involved with occultic practices for a period of her life. She stopped suddenly after a very negative experience. I met her mother on a few occasions before her passing from cancer, and she was a lovely woman. I think everyone's situation is unique. In my case, as in king David's sin, the Lord brought something positive, i.e., the children. That being said, it brings with it great challenges. I would say that if life events bring you to a similar situation, pick up your cross. But I do not recommend finding a partner with the intent of converting them. I say the same to my children. Lay it out on the table from the very beginning.

[@cvrki7]

How did you get your kids to love the Church?

[@Ctownking206]

As a Orthodox Christian I married a Lutheran, 6 years later after much prayer she is catechumen in the church! She loves orthodoxy and is so grateful to God for her conversion! We were married in the Orthodox Church as well only because she was baptized in the name of the father son and holy Spirit. Anyway God bless! I couldn't be happier!

[@bsdnfraje]

Don't. I am married to an atheist. I didn't become Orthodox until after we began to have children. I'm hopeful for my wife, my children's mother, but there are so many things in life I do not have. Don't.

[@angeleyes7401]

this is a cross brother. May God enlighten her.

[@missnthrop5763]

I'm sympathetic to her side, you changed and brought something to the table after she'd committed herself to you? If anything, she's the one who has the right to complain about the struggle. Christ died on the Cross for us and warned that following Him comes with a price, I find it odd when Christians think it should be easy. It is not! You chose Orthodoxy and should find joy in being its ambassador to your wife, if you don't then why on Earth would she desire to join the faith? Does she see you happy? Does she see you sacrificing for others? Or does she hear you complain about fasting or that she isn't doing something your way when she isn't even a Christian? I hope you find a way to carry your cross like Christ carried His and Hosea his...there's always a reason for it, trust in Him☦

[@Cobruh_Commander]

​@@missnthrop5763That's a ham-fisted assumption you made about his life. You don't know her like he does.

[@missnthrop5763]

@@Cobruh_Commander He said he converted after their children were born thus meaning that he changed by converting, and Glory to God for that. I think that would be difficult for a non-Christian to process inasmuch as it would be for a Christian couple where one leaves the faith; this shouldn't be complicated to understand.

[@vrhovnipredstojnik7650]

Hi brother, I am in a similar position. I believe my own good thoughts, words and deeds can make a difference, if not, none might say we did not try!

[@ProtestantismLeftBehind]

What is the draw? What would an Orthodox Christian see in a non-Orthodox? Are they looking at all the wrong things? Missionary dating is a very bad idea. Don’t be unevenly yoked. Great advice Fr. Peter. As Orthodox we are to look to Scripture, the saints and fathers.

[@jonathanthethird52]

I mean, the draw could simply be her character.

[@AJ0223]

@jonathanthethird52 yeah. I've written walls of text on other comments on this video already but I'd do it. Pursuing a relationship doesn't automatically equate to engagement to be married. If the vibe is right, if there is palpable love and admiration, to me it's a green light. But I can't tell anyone else what to do.

[@IIZCHAOS]

Was dating her before I got baptized. Feels wrong to just end now I'm baptized

[@DANtheMANofSIPA]

Orthodoxy is a minority in America. It can be hard for a young man to find an actually devout Orthodox young lady who isnt already married or isnt uninterested

[@LadyMaria]

​@@DANtheMANofSIPA Young convert men also set the bar too high, that if she isn't a "9-10" (when he's not even that) he won't court her even if she is devout and Orthodox. So they miss out on a potential wife that way, as they don't even consider her. This is from what I've observed.

[@nickmuzekari6124]

I firmly believe folks should first and foremost seek out partners who are already Orthodox. But I also believe there are exceptions if the person is open to embracing Orthodoxy. I sincerely prayed for a wife that would be Orthodox and serious about the faith and now am happily married for 19 years, six beautiful children. She was not Orthodox when we met. However, she believed it was the true Faith after I shared the history with her. Our first date was me bringing my icons and church music to her apartment (what a goofball I am haha). She converted to Orthodoxy shortly after we were married and we both knew that's where it was headed.

[@LadyMaria]

Oh wow! That is so wonderful to have brought those to her!

[@cvrki7]

So she wasn’t orthodox before you were married?

[@3isss236]

Sadly it didnt work with me, she was a faithful (Armenian Catholic), but also she was open to protestant openions, I should have left since we discussed and found out that she would never change her mind, and I blame my self because although she went with me to church, i didnt stand my ground clearly and i kept beint passive agressive with impulsive reactions whenever this topic where discussed, i should have done better, and showed her the beauty of orthodoxy in my actions not in my words only, May jesus christ be with her wherever she goes and have mercy on me I am the sinner

[@LadyMaria]

Well we all make bad mistakes in life, and it is very blessed that you've repented even though it still hurts. God allowed this to happen to help you in your Theosis, and when you find your lady, you will have this in the front of your mind and show her how a faithful Orthodox man is. Don't despair. 🤗

[@jk_33333]

Father Bless, as an Orthodox man being married to a heterodox wife I would strongly suggest putting things out on the table up front before you get married and also look at the person's disposition (ie: are they genuinely interested in the Orthodox Faith and willing to practice it). I'm in a situation where my wife respects the church but has no interest in becoming Orthodox. Had I known about all this before I was married I would have ironed out this issue before I got married. Unfortunately a lot of clergy are marrying couples now under economia but not really advising couples that it's not right for Orthodox to marry non Orthodox. Please pray for me and my wife that God may bring her to Orthodoxy 🙏

[@nickkerinklio8239]

We’re just getting desperate! I STILL haven’t met any unmarried Orthodox girls my age who are serious about the faith. This is after 2 years of Orthodoxy.

[@MC-ze8wj]

How old are you? Out of curiosity.

[@nickkerinklio8239]

@@MC-ze8wj 25

[@LadyMaria]

Please don't give up. You have time. Just keep praying and let God's will be done. 🙏

[@nickkerinklio8239]

@@LadyMaria I’m not giving up, but I struggle to be patient and faithful while I’m waiting for God’s providence.

[@LadyMaria]

@@nickkerinklio8239 I got married at 25 because of desperation of wanting to be a wife, and if God made it so, a mother. Big mistake. Just stay away from that sort of desperation.

[@angeleyes7401]

Does the Truth dilute itself with lies? It’s one thing to find the true Faith once one is married, but if you’re already TRULY orthodox before marriage, you don’t marry someone of another faith- that includes lukewarm Orthodox.

[@LukeStultz]

I agree with Father. Once you get married it makes it so much harder to live as we are called if you are not on the same page. This happens especially when the non-orthodox person is a Christian. They do not have the complete understanding of God and the mysteries - so when you are trying to grow deeper in God they will not understand why you do what you do. Of course you can teach them, but you will be fighting an uphill battle until they decide/ or not decide to come to the true faith.

[@BrodyAleksander-YOB]

North America better start building monasteries, the churches are filled with Young Men

[@biljanamiljkovic4646]

In Serbia we have at least 3x more women in church on every service compared to men..and there are also young women, so if you do not want to go to monastery you know where you can find them..

[@TranslatedAssumption]

​@@biljanamiljkovic4646I went to Saint Sava Cathedral in Milwaukee a few weeks ago for a Sunday liturgy and I was impressed because the entire church was full and there were an abundance of ethnic Serbian women there, both married and single. That being said, I was scandalized by how some of the single women dressed. It was modest by the letter of the law but not in the spirit of the law, too many women wearing clothing knowing that it attracts too much attention to themselves and their goods as it were.

[@Valexia683]

@GuitarTunings33someone i know in the netherlands says he and someone else were the only men in the church, the rest were women. The feminist disease has ruined women in the west. But elsewhere there are plenty it seems (hopefully)..

[@bsdnfraje]

@@TranslatedAssumption Frankly, almost no one begins life a saint, and have you seen the 'culture' they're exposed to? At least they were in church.

[@agiasf7330]

​@TranslatedAssumption but he's speaking of the Serbian OC in Serbia. Our young men who are called to marriage will do well to seek committed Orthodox young women in other countries, such as Serbia.

[@Jhadar]

I'm so stupid. I wish I was serious about my faith before getting with her because now I'm seeing that we'll never be married. I wanted to date to marry but now I'm seeing that we'll never get that far. If only I knew of Orthodoxy before dating her because then I'd save myself from being deeply saddened. Please pray for me, her, and my family because I'm also undergoing serious family issues.

[@HenryHoolington]

I don’t want to have to marry a Russian or Ukrainian girl just because she’s Orthodox. I think marrying inside your own culture is just as important as “inter-faith” marriage. Find a Christian who is willing to embrace a journey into Orthodoxy with you. If she truly loves you she will

[@1214gooner]

Well there needs to be major monastery expansion planning because there are so few Orthodox Christians in the Western world and that’s not changing. The overwhelming majority of orthodox men will not be able to find an Orthodox wife in their lifetime, and that’s the plain and obvious truth that needs to be acknowledged. There could be a divine providence in this situation however, as God could be raising a generation of men to live in holy celibacy for these future “Last Days.”

[@johnythepvpgod1470]

Were reaching historical levels of apostasy and technological progress but this soo called "loneliness epidemic" brings the verse to my head Mat:24 19 But woe to those who are pregnant and to those who are nursing babies in those days " perhaps its for the best

[@OrthoAutist]

Father Bless Thank you for the wise words on this matter!

[@joannam1446]

Be careful, because your non-Orthodox significant other may convert in deed, but not in heart. If you date a non-Orthodox person and wish to marry in the church, and they agree to convert for marriage and not for Christ, troubles come your way. Make sure they convert for the right reasons.

[@billcynic1815]

At my (very convert heavy) parish, there is only one couple that was both Orthodox when they first met. Every other couple either came in together, or one brought the other in. Most of the time, when the other isn't at least a catechumen when they wed, it gets really messy. Bringing in your SO is less than ideal. And it often goes badly. Not always, but often. But the numbers simply are not there for everyone, especially young men.

[@daltonn2023]

What is to be done? There aren’t any Orthodox girls for the most part

[@IlluminedOne]

Go deeper in the faith and if a spouse is God’s will for you, then he will bring her to you

[@ofaoilleachain]

I have hope for my partner. I'm aspiring to become a catechumen soon, but I don't know how my partner feels about Orthodoxy, I have a feeling she will be open, but we shall see. May Gods will be done.

[@hernanmendoza7182]

Good video :) 👌🏽

[@elainapoochie2734]

Been there. Do not do it!

[@thelastshallbefirst3653]

Based off my own expereince and many of these comments, why does it seem there are so few young women in the church these days? There is plenty of young men, but only a few women. My guess is the corruption in the world seems to be targeting women really hard and weakening men at the same time. This leads to an imbalance of the genders in their God-given roles, which sadly penetrates and permeates even pious households who have tried to raise their children in Orthodoxy. It may be that the Lord will use the converts to the church to help this problem. Our modern-day evangalism in America might just be coverting our spouses by living the Orthodox life like the early church.

[@OrthodoxEthos]

There are not enough men who are true examples of virtue, giving an example of holiness, drawing women to Christ, perhaps?

[@thelastshallbefirst3653]

@OrthodoxEthos I do not know the issues in their depths, but what you said has to be true because St. Seraphim of Sarov said if we acquire the Spirit of peace a thousand around can be saved. So we definitely have the responsibility to pursue holiness in Christ. However, the other issue of sheer numbers is also something to analyze, right?

[@Cobruh_Commander]

​​@@OrthodoxEthosBecause so many young women are still brainwashed by the siren song of feminism and modernity. Many minds and souls have been poisoned against the truth, leading to very few conversions unless they are willing to question themselves, which doesn't happen often to be honest.

[@Cobruh_Commander]

​@@thelastshallbefirst3653 Too many young women are still bought into the psyop of feminism and modernity. We can't fix them, but God will since that will take a miracle.

[@Cobruh_Commander]

Or perhaps women are still by and large sucked into the siren song of feminism. ​

[@dimstar1265]

I tried this, it didn't work, I am inclined to believe it never really works with very few exceptions.

[@cvrki7]

You tried dating or marriage?

[@vcharles93]

Go for it as long as she doesn't bend corners. Orthodoxy is a very strick religion because they don't play when it comes to their God and their faith. The unorthodox is where everyone is equal in Christ sight and works as one in him. I think is a throne difference..

[@petergunn9149]

Then how can I help my wife come to the faith I pray and l lament for our salvation hers more than mine because this is what I now bare ☦️

[@nickmuzekari6124]

The only thing you can do is be a faithful Orthodox Christian and love your wife and pray for her, and if/when she is open, share the truth and beauty of the Orthodox faith with her and how important it is to you that she would become Orthodox and join in that adventure of true life and salvation. Has she come to an Orthodox service? What does she think? Learn or use what her loves are and approach it from that way. For instance, if she loves music, bam, Orthodox music here and there. If she loves history, bam, interesting stories that highlight the historical side of Orthodoxy. If she loves gardening, bam, an Orthodox saint who was a gardener or sharing in general that the Orthodox way of life is like tending a garden. If she loves cooking, share the story of St. Euphrosynos with her. This is not a formula of course and easy for me to just spit out, but tapping into her loves is what came to me. I will pray for you and your wife.

[@petergunn9149]

@@nickmuzekari6124 Thank you my brother in Christ ☦️☦️☦️ I have an icon of St. Euphrosynos the cook😁☦️

[@LadyMaria]

​​@@petergunn9149We (husband and I) got a card icon of St. Euphrosynos the Cook at our baptisms. My husband printed off a bigger copy of it and framed it, then put it on the wall in our kitchen. 🩷 Little things like that will help your wife to look at Orthodoxy and most importantly living the life. May this be blessed!

[@Geego23675]

Yes, I want to convert but my wife says she will leave me. 😢

[@nickmuzekari6124]

I don't know your situation, but there is nothing more important than becoming an Orthodox Christian because it is the truth and fullness of communion with God. Are you currently in talks with an Orthodox priest? May I also ask what your wife's worldview/belief is?

[@Geego23675]

​Yeah, it adds weight to my decision. I don't think I'll ever become fully convinced of the truth of any tradition. I'll have to eventually ascent to the most plausible choice. I think my wife's state is contributing to my decision since it can't be purely based on evidence. We come from a protestant background and she values culture and tradition over logical proofs etc.​

[@LadyMaria]

I knew a couple almost in the same shoes. The husband was in Inquirer classes with my husband and I. He went to Orthodox Divine services every chance he got, except Sundays when they had to go to the non-denom. place. He would slowly introduce her to Orthodoxy but she refused. He invited her to services and reluctantly she went but still refused to embrace Orthodoxy. So he waited patiently. He continued and didn't put pressure on her but showed her the beauty of Holy Orthodoxy. Over time she began to go to more services, then Sundays too. Then she became an Inquirer, stopped going to the non-denom. place. She became a Catechumen with her husband and they were baptized with their daughter finally, and then later married in the Church. Don't give up hope. She says this but if she loves you, she will stay.

[@BMC867]

Manage your expectations. She either wants to follow you or she doesn't. God always honors my choices.

[@Parhelion2X-p5p]

Someone please help me understand. It is not the first time I see a priest give instruction on something without mentioning any sources from the bible. I am orthodox, but I don't understand why he is talking about what's good and what's bad, when we have our answer directly in the bible: 1 Corinthians 7: 12-14 "To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy."

[@spyrosstivactas2300]

Oomph! It seems I may have a problem. I am a Greek Orthodox man, married to a Roman Catholic woman. We were married in a Roman Catholic Church. Does this mean we are not blessed?

[@sihtnaelkk2187]

I'm afraid not..

[@LoveLove-jk9kz]

Did you not speak to YOUR priest before?

[@OrthodoxEthos]

Have you reviewed what the Church teaches on what marriage is, how you are united in Christ, what makes it a MYSTERY?

[@spyrosstivactas2300]

@@OrthodoxEthos Im not sure I have father. Even though I was born in a Greek Orthodox family, we were casual in practice and teachings. I had only heard and seen the Greek Orthodox Church marry Roman Catholics and Orthodox. The Catholic Priest confirmed that ours was an acceptable marriage. No one came forth to tell us differently. Even the Orthodox Priest I confess to today, didn’t mention the issue with our marriage. There was a time, due to secular education, where I became an Atheist. I have only just recently found the Truth. I have only recently started practicing Orthodox Christianity seriously. And of course I have a lot to learn of how I’ve grieved our Lord and Saviour. A good friend of mine was married it Both Churches on the same day! Is that how it is meant to be done? Do my wife and I need to marry in an Orthodox Church?

[@sihtnaelkk2187]

@@spyrosstivactas2300 My humble opinion, and may I be corrected if I'm wrong by the orthodox people that know better, is that not only it is not a valid marriage as far as our faith is concerned, but that you may have to find another spiritual father due to the degree of the current one's unbelievable negligence Heterodox sacraments are not only not valid but participating in them as orthodox is grave sin, and your father should not only not have remained silent but should have warned you in no uncertain terms Please my friend, please, ask another orthodox priest for a second opinion

[@bigbosssauce7]

Do NOT do this. I am married and became Orthodox, my wife is Catholic and has been all her life, and our marriage is falling apart since I've become Orthodox.

[@LadyMaria]

Is there no hope she will become Orthodox?

[@starstray4326]

Any guy reading my comment. Find a wife in the church. That girl you want to convert so badly will ruin you and destroy your future and no you do not have it under control.

[@billcynic1815]

There are far more young men than young women. I have been to many parishes, and this has been so for all of them. If every single Orthodox woman got with a single Orthodox man tomorrow, there would be a significant number of single Orthodox men left with zero prospects.

[@starstray4326]

@@billcynic1815 My despair wants to agree with you because I do see more young men then women but I don't even know the number hairs on my head. How could you say for certain there are no single women?

[@themistafi]

Depends where you at right, if you try to find single orthodox Christians in America it is going to be hard. Finding some in Greece, Russia or Serbia will be significantly easier.

[@billcynic1815]

@starstray4326 I didn't say there are no single women; I said they are vastly outnumbered by the single men. Aside from anecdotal testimony from every parish I've been to and several priests who've spoken on the subject? According to PEW Research, in 2007 every single self-identified Christian group had more women than men. In 2014 this was still true with one single exception: Orthodoxy. That was 10 years ago. I haven't seen anything to suggest that trend hasn't changed, and everything I've seen suggests that the difference is greater now than in 2014.

[@billcynic1815]

@@themistafi Know several young American Orthodox guys, especially ethnic ones, who will visit the old countries exactly for that reason.

[@Nobody28x]

What about trying to join the church but already have a family with someone who doesn’t even believe in a god

[@otiswong2091]

Based

[@yuggoof]

Aren't we told to seek the Kingdom of God first? If God wills us to be married then it will happen, if not then it is not to be... compromising the life in Christ seems to potentially lead to something far worse than simply remaining unmarried.

[@MrSilver2nd]

The Orthodox Church is very clear in regards to the sacrament of marriage however GODs mysteries and how he works is in fact a mystery. The question is about a hypothetical scenario. The answer is do you understand what you are risking? This may be as much a test for you as it is for her. It is easy to replace your love for GOD with the love/lust for a woman or vice versa. If you do in fact have GOD a top the hierarchy of importance in your life it still does not mean that you might not be tempted away. Discernment between the voice of GOD and the voice of the other is not easy as it was not easy for the Father's prior to reaching theosis... Having said this I had a municipal marriage by the state and married a Roman Catholic woman whose family history is Orthodox. We brought children into the world yet still have not married in the Church. All my children are baptized Orthodox... And behold my wife has become more Orthodox than me. When she is ready and when GOD speaks to her heart she will enter the Orthodox Church and we will marry in the Church. Until then I trust in GOD. His mysteries are indeed mysterious! Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy, lord have mercy. ☦️

[@OrthodoxEthos]

Do not tarry… do not leave it for long… it is not God’s will for you to be separated from the Mysteries, living in this state of separation.

[@MrSilver2nd]

@@OrthodoxEthos in my case Father the longer I've left it the closer she has come to the Faith. I feel we are almost there! It also helps to know the character of the individual and their traits. She doesn't respond well to what she perceives as ultimatums or forced as to be expected. We go to Orthodox Church on Sundays not because of me but because of her! GOD is at work! My children partake in the sacrament but we do not as we are not allowed... This I know will change soon as I've prayed 🙏.

[@robertrobles7338]

We can not oblige to someone to convert, just tell them what we think and accept if not. Cause if we try to impose we are gonna be the same as some.muslims that want to convert his couples.

[@ianmackenzie686]

Theory vs reality, ivory tower vs in the field.

[@jonathankelly2655]

i guess everyone needs to become monastics because there's no women in the church 😂😂

[@akatosh2795]

Three people in the mariage? That's awk when it comes down to baby making.

[@damianhuman]

bad idea

[@petergianakopoulos4926]

I give up

[@roblox1387]

My English Teacher who is Orthodox is married to a Roman Catholic Woman

[@karenwithak4770]

I am not Orthodox but my husband is. I love that he can connect with God through his choosen faith. I encourage him to have an icon corner. I have made some very close orthodox friends through him. We used to drive a 2 hour return trip to go to church but after he was cancelled for no apparent reason, no text, no call, nothing. He would have to take a phone confession before Sunday to take communion. The priest just cut him off. He is devastated. I am sad for him. Will I ever convert, not after this. This is how a cult behaves. Also some comments he received on this chat from someone about failing, yep that's a loving attitude.

[@LadyMaria]

Holy Orthodoxy is not a cult but the very Church. Are there people with hardened hearts in the Church? Oh yes, and that will be anywhere you go, sadly. I'm truly sorry that this happened to your husband. It shouldn't be as we're all imperfect and sinners: Patriarchs, Priests, Bishops, monastics, and laity alike; and no matter what anyone has done, they should be embraced when they come home in repentance, like the Prodigal Son, which we read about a few weeks ago before Great Lent. Giving no indicator of why one is "cut off" is cowardly, IMHO, and that Priest should have his Bishop informed of this. I don't see why anyone would be cut off except if one created a scene in church, disturbing the services, which I doubt your husband did. Perhaps it's not your husband's initial problem (though the after effects are, regrettably) but the Priest's. I don't know what the situation is or what is going through his mind but as a lowly lay woman I can't think of any reason why anyone would be barred save the situation above. Of course I don't need to know details as that's private. But, I would suggest getting in contact with the Bishop if the Priest can't be talked to about this to find out the solution. Also, maybe to go another Parish if at all feasible. About the chat: No excuses for this. Gossip is awful and damaging. Parishioners are supposed to be loving family, not snipes. Again, I'm sorry (I know this won't help any but I'm still very sorry and can sympathize). The people who are causing the gossip in a normal Parish would be dealt with by the clergy. This situation burns me up thinking people are being mistreated in the place where they should be most at home! Let me know how things go, please. May God bless you both. 🙏 Edit: Typos.

[@karenwithak4770]

@@LadyMaria thankyou for your considered response. I'm not sure how this will end for my husband. He feels like an outcast. He is sad he will never take communion again. Or go to the liturgy. The next closest church is 3 hours away. Which is just not affordable for us with the cost of petrol.

[@LadyMaria]

@@karenwithak4770 I am so very sorry. I know your husband's pain with not being able to receive or confess. Though in my case it was my own doing. Well, both of you please keep praying. This is part of your husband's Theosis, as painful as it is, in his humility in this time. And for you too, in your support of your beloved. Our Saints suffered similar situations and even expulsion from the jurisdiction back when that was done. Maybe he can read about their struggles in relation to his own. This will help him as well as the Reader's Services. This is not right at all. But your husband will prosper and you too. Well, may you both be blessed by our great God. 🙏 ☦ If you need anything, let me know. I can help with home Reader Services.

[@savinggift158]

Disparity of cult is risky Would not advise being unequally yoked