OUR FIRST YEAR OF MARRIAGE | Fights, Intimacy, Communication

In two days (November 13th), Tyler and I will celebrate our one year wedding anniversary! In some ways I can't believe it's already been a year. In others, it feels like we've been married much longer simply because of how many big life events we've navigated together in one short year. There's so much that could be said about what we've learned in the first year, but here are seven things that came to mind. Whether you are single, dating, engaged, or married, I pray you find these little snippets encouraging! 🤍
#ChristianMarriage #RelationshipAdvice #ChristianAdvice
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“Let all that you do be done in love." | 1 Corinthians 16:14

[@kacinicole]

Which one of these was most surprising or helpful to you?!

[@Search4Cherise]

I’ve been married 5 months today! We also did most our work on the front end. So our first few months have been far more pleasant than what you typically hear about. It helps the transition so much to talk about the hard things sooner than later. Your most surprising lesson to me was the withdrawal, I too have learned that is not effective. So I take a moment to pray, & then I initiate the question asking to seek to understand my husband first, before judging, or choosing to wallow in wondering why he hasn’t asked me any questions; I can make the first move towards peace and resolution, & in return we both understand each other better, & feel more connected. 🥰🥰🥰

[@kacinicole]

@@Search4Cherise it's so cool to hear you've experienced that as well! And I love what you said about the withdrawal and what you do instead - so powerful and Spirit-led! 🙌🏼

[@Louise-jl2eh]

(not married yet) the withdrawal one for sure!

[@Louise-jl2eh]

As in the most helpful!

[@luqicharmz]

We recently celebrated our 20 year anniversary. The best advice I can give any other couple is don’t give up on each other.

[@kacinicole]

Aw I love this and happy 20 years! 🥳

[@jillianmaners9538]

I'm nine months into marriage and one of the biggest lessons learned was timing in communication... SO important, both in how the conversation goes and how it is resolved. To go alongside it, showing the willingness to depart and come back to the conversation at a later date, if emotions are high or one of us is too tired... There is maturity in having the self-awareness to say "I don't have the capacity to discuss this right now" and respect in saying "Ok, we can talk about this later."

[@kacinicole]

Yes this is so true and SO good - thanks for sharing 🙌🏼

[@tori1494]

I recently celebrated my husband and I's 3rd anniversary last week. ♥️ The best advice I can give to any couple new in marriage is to always love each other, communicate and try understand each other, even in the small things because that goes a long way. As always, keep God first because He is the one who has it all in His hands. ♥️🙏

[@Kisha_Tech]

I loved the part of you talking about setting unrealistic expectations for yourself (that he didn't even put on you). I feel like I am guilty of this (getting married next week), and have this desire to do all of the things in the house. I logically know that's not super realistic because I'm working full time just like he is. Thanks for this!

[@joycekyalo8117]

Hi Kaci. Could you kindly do a video of what tough or difficult questions a person could ask during the tough conversations with their prospective future partner? For some people it's really hard to understand what these tough conversations actually entail or what they mean. Thank you in advance for your consideration.

[@gonurseyourself__]

I have been married for almost 3 months and this is so relatable & also encouraging 🥰🥰having different meanings/interpretations for the same words is SO real haha

[@esfomeada_1015]

I also always love talking about the more deep things, y'know. See the other person's perspective about family, love, suffering and etc. Also the fact that you guys do weekly prayer sessions together just confirms my desire to have a husband just like yours. Also happy anniversary!

[@kacinicole]

YES - love those heart chats 🤗 and this is so encouraging, thank you! 💛

[@Search4Cherise]

Happiest Anniversary of Covenant Love through Marriage! 🎉🎉🎉🤍🤍🤍

[@kacinicole]

Thank you so much! 😊

[@childoftheking9907]

Happy anniversary!! ❤️My husband and I are coming up on our 20th anniversary next spring, and we have really just been "living" it for the last 4 years! We too have come to a lot of the same conclusions that you shared! For you to have discovered these things in your first year is a huge blessing! I believe you and Tyler will be an amazing picture of Christ and the church... Cuz after all, is this not one of our greatest callings as Christian couples?? 😊 I think all the advice you shared was great... The communication, the tendency toward manipulation, never "bad-mouthing" your spouse, etc... But I just want to mention that I am glad you touched on intimacy! It is a topic that so many people avoid or shame others for talking about, and yet it is a blessing and gift from God! Christians need to talk about it and take it back from what the enemy has turned it into... A selfish dirty thing... 😢 A married couple SELFLESSLY loving one another thru intimacy is one of the most beautiful and pure things we will ever experience! ❤️ (Hope this is an inspiration, and not too "in depth". 🥰) I pray blessings over your marriage and your new little one! God bless!

[@tyradubose7759]

Thank you. This helps me feel not so alone. Love your strategies

[@hannahcree]

I’ve come to notice that I absolutely adore serving my husband, doing the little things he loves seeing done and asking him “Is there anything I can do for you?.” I also deeply cherish praying over him. Every moment we spend together is so very precious to me from simply grabbing our morning coffee or taking the dog for a walk and talking about the future we have together brings me immense joy that I know he can feel too. It is so beautiful and intimate to be able to bond in such a way and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

[@lhp555]

Happy for you! May God continue to lead you guys and bless your beautiful relationship.❤✝️

[@kacinicole]

Thank you so much! 🤍

[@Minalei1]

We're also the first year into our marriage (10. Dec) and we couldnt be happier. We luckily did all the emotional work beforehand, otherwise we wouldnt have married in the first place.

[@kaitlync.2628]

Happy anniversary!!! 🎊 🎉

[@rabeavonzons8446]

Happy anniversary! 💐

[@gracengoepe1695]

Happy anniversary ❤️

[@taytayruh]

So good, Kaci! You are super wise. Happy 1 year to you guys!!!

[@Teaguec39]

Happy anniversary.🎉🎉🎉

[@Louise-jl2eh]

Really useful advice 👍🏼😊

[@daniellekramer93]

Happy late Anniversary!!!

[@jennalillywho]

This is good stuff ❤

[@snapstories9395]

Thank you so much for the great video! I'm hoping to get married someday, so your message was very encouraging to me! The advice that you gave would be great in relationships with family, too.

[@kuhlemavuso7635]

I can’t believe it’s been a year Kaci!🙆🏾‍♀️🤗🎉 Happy anniversary ❤️. It seems like it was only yesterday when you announced you are engaged! So happy for you guys. May God bless you ❤️Thank for sharing your journey with us😊

[@kacinicole]

It's so wild right?! 🤯 Thank you so much for your kind words 💛

[@lucygale336]

Happy anniversary 🎉 💗

[@kacinicole]

Thank you so much! 😊

[@coreyboschert]

Happy anniversary to you both! Please keep me in prayers i met this girl and things went really well but it wouldn't work out she said for I want to join the United States Marines. I know God knows everything for us and the best God bless all in Jesus.

[@kaileyspencer2175]

These are all great! I also struggle with pulling away when feeling upset and wanting my husband to pursue me. This is a hard thing to work through! Also happy anniversary!

[@kacinicole]

Totally is - glad I'm not alone 🤪 thank you so much! 💛

[@Jjjjjj-to6wd]

Would love to hear later about life as a stay at home mom. How to have different but complementary roles as a husband and wife (and maybe about the pressure from media/feminism to have similar roles as parents and the importance of career (like the message that being ”only” a mom and a wife isnt enough)

[@AgnesA98]

Happy anniversary!✨

[@kacinicole]

Thank you! 🤍

[@karlidilon5736]

Amen to this! You and your husband are glorifying the LORD together. Thank you so much for this. And I’m praying for y’all’s sweet family ❤

[@kacinicole]

This is so encouraging, thank you 🤍

[@Aya-nx4gv]

Happy anniversary🥳🥳

[@kacinicole]

Thank you so much 🥰

[@teecee6655]

❤❤❤❤

[@bryanmelton5538]

CONGRATULATIONS KACI IM SORRY IM LATE

[@blessedandhopeful]

😉🤍🤍✨🙏🏻 cool