Overcome social anxiety WITHOUT therapy

Paul calls in to ask how to overcome social anxiety without therapy. #ThePsychShowOfficeHours
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[@drali]

What helps you to overcome social anxiety?

[@MrGreen-dp4oz]

Thankyou doctor for everything u do. You are an amazing human being.

[@jolesin]

First of all, thank you for this wonderful video, Doc! I really enjoyed this as I am also one who struggled with social anxiety from time to time after being ditched by my group of friends when I was younger. I think my approach to the anxiety that has been growing inside of me ever since that tragic event was to distance myself with people. I will first start to notice that when I'm getting all anxious, I will bite into my nails and totally just bite them all of from my fingers. Then after that when the anxiety truly knocks by and pull me into another round of relapse, I will take more time with myself, trying to either bottle it all up or just pour it all out (by crying by myself or maybe write it all down on my journal/book/piece of paper), and then I would end the progress with taking care of myself aka having a me time. Honestly I never really thought of trying exposure therapy (as I am also now quarantined in this hard time we're having) but by watching this I got some ideas to perhaps introspect and take a closer look into my whole social anxiety situation. Once again, thank you very much! This was a good video, you did great❤️

[@dianalee9557]

I first heard about social anxiety from watching 1 of your videos, last year. The fears are the same as the guy's and are mostly about talking to someone in person, pretty much everyone, worse if I don't know them. Then pandemic came along, and I started getting into social media (1st youtube then twitter a few months ago). I find it easier to interact, even with the excuse that I don't speak English well (which is true, maybe I should study it better) when my brain doesn't react as quickly as I'd like. I have never talked to so many different people in my entire life. Of course the problem will come with in-person interaction. But for now, I'm fine.

[@RedstoneMiner18]

Here from youtube *lol*

[@ryof_7765]

Talking positively with myself it’s helped me alot even if I messed up a little bit i be proud of me,but this was before the pandemic..things with me now is a total mess and it’s make me overthink about my situation after couple of months when I’ll return to reality

[@MariettoQuaranta]

I lost so many opportunities and people because of social anxiety. I can't take it anymore. I literally can't even open my mouth, I'm scared I'll remain alone for the rest of my life

[@iaprawitasari3028]

Please don't give up,i know how it feels its very hard tho

[@MariettoQuaranta]

@@iaprawitasari3028 Thank you❤️

[@MariettoQuaranta]

@Allure ❤️

[@javierlopez-ko2ph]

its gonna be ok, ull get over it. just be content with ur situation and love. yourself.

[@mikaelneault]

You are not alone 💖

[@jrocupinthisma]

God knew I'd be too powerful if I had social skills.

[@Ryan-rd5ol]

😅

[@kreative22672]

thats a good perpective to look at haha

[@AmanyAhmed210]

Nope, he knew you gonna be arrogant without social anxiety

[@RicJG7]

Yeah you would be, so you need to live up to that potential and own that space, don't give up til you get there

[@JustT0m752]

This college student is brave and clearly articulated what social anxiety feels like. I am decades past college but I still struggle with what this young man is going through. God Bless

[@115online]

right, and that's what's interesting. He blames its on his tongue issues. But it's clearly all in his head, because he speaks so well here. It's crazy what are brain does.

[@aubriewest1135]

People with social anxiety are so intelligent

[@setorious]

One of my fears is being taken out of context and being hated on for something I'm misunderstood for.

[@coffintears5821]

Same

[@Alekito-qc7cg]

Bruuhh samee

[@ely915]

Same

[@eric-ms3pz]

Same

[@staticz6275]

This has happened to me and it is what it is tbh people are just ignorant

[@strawberriesblueberries2258]

Ever since I was a child I had social anxiety. I feel very shy and I shut down and become very quiet. I feel more safe living alone in my apartment. I’m afraid of people in general. I feel afraid to speak up, and confrontation is my biggest fear.

[@malebeery6832]

nice way to look at it : people are like NPC in video game, meaning you don't feel anything like that with NPC that you meet in the game, people are acutely the same in the game of life of yours.

[@jimskeuh]

@@malebeery6832 so you suggest being apatic is gonna help the problem?

[@livedeliciously]

Same here. Looking back I was always like. The future is scary.

[@chronicfatiguehermithiker3022]

I’ve been practicing exposure tolerance by expressing myself in comments sections. It’s distressing, I pray before hitting the send button, but self expression is satisfying. I’ve done years of exposure in person but though I have experience and have lived a life, I’ve become a total hermit now, can’t leave the house unless I have no choice.

[@pedronavaja2350]

I relate to this so much man. Although, I don't really know whether I'm just introverted, reserved, and simply like spending alone time rather than socialising or if I'm outright not socially fit, lacking the skills to interact with other people, explaining why I don't go out much, or feel cohibited when trying to express myself.

[@khansolo4178]

Never thought my social anxiety was being expressed in me never commenting on anything, anywhere.

[@stellat.r8825]

Would it help if I told you that no-one remembers youtube comments? We read them and go about our day honestly. So you may feel like you are exposing yourself and inner thoughts to us but we don't know you. Most people in real life too you think they are paying attention to what you say or what you do but most of us go about our day and think about our problems and what we will eat for dinner.

[@stellat.r8825]

I have a huge problem with job interviews because I have a strong fear of being judged as stupid and incompetent. I was very surprised after I had a terrible interview where I couldn't even articulate myself well enough ....that I got a call back for the next round of interviews. Our sense of reality is most times distorted especially our view of ourselves.

[@chronicfatiguehermithiker3022]

@@stellat.r8825 It doesn’t matter, the exposure is overwhelming no matter what; it’s not a reasonable thing.

[@aliexmuzkillme]

For me, there's also a fear of rejection. I think I fear rejection the most, and I kind of anticipate it from almost everyone.

[@workingg4772]

Why do u fear rejection

[@Hello_am_Mr_Jello]

​@@workingg4772 lack of experiences i may guess

[@iKyleTz]

i'm with you on this one, i feel like i'm going to be rejected by everyone i speak to, so i'd rather say nothing if I can. i moved high schools for the last few years of school and i was rejected by so many groups i tried to join and it's really stuck with me for the past 10 years :( It sucks though because i know i'm missing out on meeting and being friends with amazing people just because i think they will reject the real me

[@chanellaDaboss]

The thing about social anxiety is that you just have to do things. Stop thinking too much. From my experience, we need to be more in the do and be willing to make mistakes. I know it's hard especially when you are kind of a perfectionist. If something makes me nervous I say that. I've found that announcing that I am feeling anxious always helps me. I've noticed that there is this thing that goes on in your head when you are anxious. For some reason you don't want people to notice that you are anxious, so it just adds a double portion of anxiety. Saying I am anxious about something before saying anything else to a person definitely helps me relief some of that anxiety.

[@fridagylterud9491]

But it’s easy to say «don’t think so much». It’s not as easy to do so. I say this to myself all the time, that I have to stop caring, stop overthinking, but I can’t overcome it.

[@yugeno]

it's really hard to 'just do things' when you have terrible physical symptoms though

[@sharper12341]

@@fridagylterud9491 Agreed! What has helped me is a lot of meditation to calm the mind and inner work to find out who you truly are. Many good people on YT to explain/work on ego death.

[@AmanyAhmed210]

I think that worsen it! Because when you do you will became more anxious and then you 're less to think clearly, so you gonna make more mistakes and then have problems so you have more anxiety and it became PTSD I think we have to go outside then accept that we will have panick attack so we isolate and do something we love and then go outside again and then go to isolation again and feel that we are now safe, and it will reduce by time. As any phobia, as any child we accept what he feels but we help him step by step to grow out of it.

[@bhatsumaira547]

I think I m literally living the life of this college student. By the way it is my first comment ever I did on a social media platform.....just want to take baby steps to overcome this social anxiety.i just recently got to know that I might be most probably suffering from social anxiety when a group of relatives came to our home and asked me a few questions regarding my studies and I was like my breath got caught in my throat ,I was not even able to answer any of the questions without stuttering and I was furiously blushing and my heart was beating like anything.....i didn't want to write these many details but I just wanted to get it out of my heart. I hope whoever read this didn't got bored😅

[@jimkook45]

No it's okay to express your feelings❤❤

[@antoshsokol7046]

I appreciated reading this. I found personal value in your sharing. Thank you for sharing yourself.

[@mag6521]

Sending soo much love to everyone here! You’re not alone, we’re all in this together ❤️ and you are all beautiful souls.

[@rebeccajones9757]

My husband struggles with social anxiety. He gets very self conscious and insists that I handle anything that involves talking to strangers. He doesn't want to talk to cashiers, repair technicians, doctors, neighbors, etc.

[@gabor6259]

But then how did you fall in love with him?

[@xzonia1]

@@gabor6259 Lots of women like the strong, silent type :)

[@iivin4233]

Good to know that the one time he spoke up it was the right person to speak up to.

[@fifimomo7696]

​@@gabor6259that is a strugke too. I dr nstance met my hb through an online dating aite. I was despdetaley lonely so evenrually I had to do this as in real life I wuls have neber been able as I don t make eye contact much. After a couple of days of chatting online I had enough courrage to meet him, as mostly we are scared to socialise wiith strangers and he didn t feel as being a stranger anymore

[@ETFsinner]

​@@xzonia1strong? And where do I fins these women. Having social anxiety makes it really difficult to make and keep relationships

[@akashverma5756]

Having social anxiety, It requires great courage to contact and talk to therapists.

[@whyisgamora4191]

It's interesting to see how different social anxiety can be for different people. I personally also have social anxiety, but whereas the person in the video would rather talk to a complete stranger or make mistakes with the cashier, I would be completely horrified doing this and have no problem talking to people I already know ^^ Sounds like his fears are rooted in some kind of fear of being embarrassed in front of friends/existing social network while my fear is judgement of others, so talking to frineds - people who I know won't judge me - isn't scary for me.

[@HonorarySaiyan]

Yeah, our minds are complicated.

[@opopo3342]

Same i overthink conversations. As an example i was going to buy a snack and the cashier said something that i didnt hear and i said something wrong. I thought about that for weeks. And i am a whole different person when i am with friends.

[@beri4138]

Yes. Mine is like yours. Can't talk to strangers at all.

[@Dregomz02]

While i feel pretty comfortable with my friends and feel secure, but are terrified of strangers and being forced to sit in single room with them for more than 10mins. I used to not be able to talk over phone due fear but overcome that with time and help of psilocybin.

[@beri4138]

@@Dregomz02 I still can't say anything other than "yes" or "no" on the phone. Anything else and I feel like the whole world is judging me.

[@meganmorgan7491]

The new symptom I’ve developed with my social anxiety is stuttering and messing up my words which makes things much much worse and makes me even less likely to speak not to mention the crushing suicidal thoughts

[@pj7294]

I have been through this the same way you did every single day and you are not alone. I try every day to overcome it but it is not really working for me. I totally know how you feel.

[@noidea2568]

Hey, I know it's been a while, but how are you doing? I'll be completely honest, that last part of your comment gave me a reason to worry quite a bit. I'd say that once someone gets suicidal thoughts, then that's a pretty clear sign to look for some help in any form, which I hope you got/will get (especially when they're "crushing" like you described). I don't have stutters, but whenever I get nervous speaking to someone one thing that helps me is to mention to that person that I'm a little nervous so I might communicate my thoughts very clearly, which makes it so that the other person usually becomes more patient and understanding. And if they aren't well then that's a good sign that that's a person you probably don't want to talk to anyway.

[@user-zv5yy7oh9u]

I feel like with social anxiety, rumination plays a huge factor. I feel like exposure therapy would be helpful in conjunction with talk therapy because sometimes rumination causes me to view an entirely normal social interaction as something that went horribly and discourages me to try again. It's important to retrain your thought process, not just exposing yourself to new situations because sometimes I have tried and have had adverse effects.

[@jordanrogers9444]

I've suffered with social anxiety now for 8 years, it seems to come in waves. Some weeks I'm good some weeks I'm really anxious. It all kind of kicked off when i was studying and made to do presentations. I crumbled a few times, now i have a constant fear of people judging me and thinking negatively. Had CBT twice, it helps certainly but I'm still battling it everyday along with health anxiety. Stay strong peeps!

[@grokker99]

samehere. my SA onsets randomly for weeks and turns off for weeks--so weird. xanax didnt work nor does cbt. trying zoloft now. hope it works

[@Teknakill]

Try 35 years.

[@nejram]

Something about the logical approach of 'your mind needs more experiences/data with these fears' actually really helps me. Thank you, thank you!

[@CMoore8539]

I honestly believe that all the social isolation during the pandemic has increased social anxiety tremendously!! Most of us have experienced it to some decree so whatever you do Do Not feel alone. Keep trying to communicate with others and I’m sure you’ll find the people who you will feel comfortable with. Stay strong.❤

[@VinodKumar-oo8rx]

Yesssssss, i was normal before but after the pandemic I am sacred of speaking because i am sacred that i may stammer😢😭😭😭

[@ripstrowie3608]

we'll get through this guys

[@lauragoodrum2248]

Just watching this and having them talk about social anxiety, gives me very intense anxiety....

[@Ariane_theblinginrealtor]

I relate so much to this young man. Social media has really opened my eyes to so many of us suffering like this. I’m working on on it

[@nenaquarry9751]

my social anxiety definitely comes up with interviews and fears of public speaking

[@MintChocoOreo]

I really appreciate and enjoy these real sessions. I'm learning a lot about being a better listener and asking the right questions 😀

[@skasoooretro]

It was really nice to hear this conversation. Thanks Paul for sharing! I also have social anxiety and I could really relate to a lot of what you were saying. I'm also diagnosed with avoidant personality disorder and depression. And been told that my emotional regulation isn't good enough to do exposure therapy. It's so hard.

[@djtamala]

This has been very helful, I'll try to ask myself these questions when I notice mine. I've definitely been feeling it a lot more lately

[@Momin_Azam]

Thank you for talking about this 🙂.

[@Quietfire83]

I was raised in the foster care system, and I'd try to make friends at school, but quite a few of the parents would learn that I was in the system & take the attitude of "not around my kid, thanks!". I received a lot of that sort of treatment from parents & teachers alike because they didn't take the time to learn that I was in a kids' home for my own safety. I was moved around a lot, too. I'd just begin to start feeling settled & then I'd be moved again. I was a very confused & lonely child, which caused me uncontrollable frustration & I'd lash out! I grew up feeling worthless, undeserving of anything good, so this led me to fall in with others who were in a similar position, which only perpetuated the isolation because none of us had ever been taught how feel comfortable in our own skin & as I felt uncomfortable & undeserving of true friendship, it would often lead me to sabotage them, as at least then, I was in control of what the outcome was! I resent that I feel so lonely, unbelonging & unwanted. God bless anyone who took the time to read this comment. 🙏 ❤

[@LurkingLinnet]

Wow mannn this was soo awesome! This really was very helpful these sessions out there on yt are life savers. To actually here from someone going through the same experience as yours and getting advice on that wonderful. Thank you!!!! This means the world❤

[@anamaycuambot4320]

I've been suffering as well .. I guess I already had this way back I was in my teen-age years and being alone in the pandemic period made it severe. I'm a teacher, 32-year-old and it's been affecting my job and personal life A LOT. Thanks to this video.

[@tanishqsuryawanshi1276]

thanks a lot for making this video, a lot of people out there don't have access to mental health needs so you are being a way for them to get access to it, really nice video, got to learn a lot.

[@overwatchkennel7558]

For years i cant put into words what i was feeling, but this dude broke it down so clearly to me.

[@Cattooplayz]

Omg sir, thank you so much. Youre so wonderful... please continue doing this!!!!

[@waki501]

I recommend you guys to read this book: How to Be Yourself by Ellen Hendriksen. I am half way there, and it's really on point. It gives you an explanation about why it happens and how you could overcome it.

[@eastside0434]

How does on overcome social anxiety.? Tia.

[@rfwcast]

I resonate so much to this. I might be late to the comment section here but I have been down this road so much myself. Hope you’re keeping well brother.

[@oatmeels1880]

TY to the college student who shared his experience. I found it extremely relatable. It was nice to feel seen and heard.

[@ryof_7765]

Thanks for your great work 💙

[@onlinesellingsuccess]

I rarely leave a comment (probably like many of the people who have commented below) but I was really touched by the caller and how well he articulated what social anxiety feels like. I know this video is two years old, and I really hope things have improved for him as he sounded like a lovely person who deserves great relationships and experiences in life.

[@rubi3182]

I second the reccomendation for the compliment exercise! I try to do it at least twice a week at work, it's intimidating at first but very gratifying once you get the hang of it. Do make sure your tone is audible though! I've hand more than a handful of instances where I go say hello to someone as they pass but my voice is too low and mumbled 😬😵.

[@binbin9196]

This was so good to watch. I need to have a conversation with my therapist. I may need to find a different one to accomplish my goals.

[@Zonix177]

I related with this student so much it's crazy, I literally feel like me and him experience social anxiety in a very similar way, it felt like I was the one in the call. I'm definitely gonna be referring back to this video from time to time.

[@LeoGamer21]

I’ve never been diagnosed with social anxiety but I feel I may have it because of how much I relate to it more than average shyness. I’ve had all the thoughts and emotions about why I’m experiencing it in the first place, finding out that it’s been mirrored through different stages in my life. Only now am I even watching these videos on the topic because I never took the chance or was given an opportunity to reach out to my direct group. Not out of fear or judgement, but because I believed I didn’t have to because none of my friends have reached out to me about something very personal to them. Which doesn’t really make a lot of sense now that I’ve thought it through. I knew something just felt off about my own personal experience when I try initiating conversation with someone new or when I’m in a large social group. I feel I get blocks or pauses when I talk, I either stutter or I don’t think of anything to say at all. I’ve made it my New Year’s resolution to work on my social skills both in my direct connections (friends and family) and outside connections (Coworkers, classmates, friends of friends, and strangers alike) I’ve already gone through the motions and shed tears in the past, but I aim to better understand myself and build myself up as a whole. I wish the same for others, if you’re reading this and you felt you needed to read this for a whole other perspective, let’s become the best us we can be together.

[@MrSchirms]

This resonates with me. Thank you caller, for sharing.

[@beautepley8352]

You asked great questions Dr. Mattu. Great ideas to gain experience and exposure. The piano and money example made me laugh and cringe because it is small talk we have to endure even if there is a mutual interest to start a conversation like the love of an instrument.

[@trifectumart]

Knowing now how common and how similar the symptons are is so much more reassuring. I might've never even knew I was having these problems.

[@basketballandbeyond1835]

I’m 32 and I just realized I have this. Since I became aware I’ve been doing a lot better with talking to people.

[@SAGEBURNT]

I've been battlying with anxiety for 10 years, I just started the exposure therapy tonight and I gotta say I feel better.

[@mysticmiserly7732]

Thank you for this 🌻 I had a video request doc, could you explain dbt and emotiom regulation, coping skills in detail and how one can apply it in their daily life? In my country, the pandemic's still raging and acess to therapy services is quite limited

[@niya9948]

One of my main struggles in life right now but I know with prayer and the right therapist I can overcome it though. I’ve heard plenty of stories of people overcoming shyness or social anxiety.

[@iulianabalan8664]

Working in sales helped me a lot with social anxiety😊. I've become another person after 9 years of doing sales.

[@Ryan-rd5ol]

I’ve been thinking of doing sales for this reason

[@user-ns7zq8ub3e]

Social anxiety kills everyone inside those who have😭

[@user-ns7zq8ub3e]

Social anxiety kills everyone inside those who have😭

[@Jgreenstreet21]

I can relate to this as well, and it is difficult to explain it to someone who doesn't understand it. CBT helped me in some ways but it didn't directly improve my social anxiety, it more so helped me improve my confidence so that I could come to terms with my social phobias and work on it.

[@ericlab_sporesoninstagram3966]

Look up ☝️☝️that handle, she’s got the best tips and stuffs for microdosing shrooms, psych meds, dmt trips, psilocybin and ships too💯

[@madhawarock]

Broooo, this is awesome!

[@muscaflaya2268]

I honestly admire this man a lot for opening up about his experience, it must have been really difficult. Hearing somebody else describe their feelings and realizing that other people go through the same struggles is really touching. I feel like all of us in this comment section can truly relate and it gives me so much hope that we can get through this over time. One thing that has been really helpful for me is trying to see the situation from an external perspective, trying to "get out of my own head". It makes me realize that other people probably don't see my actions as "weird" or "creepy", just as i don't look at other people being awkward and assume anything nefarious about them. Everyone has their own lives, people don't generally pay that much attention to what others are doing. In the grand scheme of things, a single awkward conversation won't ruin your life, but a great conversation will make your day and even help to create a meaningful relationship you might cherish for life.

[@Mushroom321-]

thank you !!! For this !! YOUR OPEN ended QUESTIONS HELP ME ! 🤔 Grateful for the guys calling !! 😮

[@paulacontrerasletelier8896]

Thank you for this!

[@paulacontrerasletelier8896]

And thanks Paul for being brave !!

[@poohthewinnie7396]

the exact situation with roommates happened to me! i wish i saw this video while i was going through that

[@taylorshymanski]

Mine is from not knowing what to say to people. I avoid people cause I don't know what to say to them.

[@christinaexplains2612]

I love how calm and articulate you are. Tips on developing that skill?

[@sketchinbeats]

Breathe

[@bethprather9241]

Your advice is really a lot easier as we age. Ive practiced this for the last few years and it works.. So older people or adults you too and Myself can do this!!😊

[@rafiaomsafae9119]

I just kept feeling the shake in his voice the entire video and I actually feel it cause that s the case for me too when i have to talk about this topic

[@kanikanewsome6305]

Thank you so much 🙏🏾

[@joshuamireles8976]

Could you do a video on LMFT and LCSW? I’m going into grad study and would love some more insight on what these do for you.

[@hogsandstews]

This college kid is literally me im convinced of it. He explained to the T what i was going through living in a suite and starting off college barely ever eating being scared of seeing people and finding it easier to just isolate. I like to think im pretty funny when im not suffering from all the anxiety but turn into a brick wall when i am. So most of my anxiety comes from not being funny and not being able to think of funny things to say anymore then ruminating about it. I went through a brief stint w Xanax self prescribed to help which it did but turned every other aspect of my life upside down. After with my new confidence from Xanax lol i Went through a period where i thought things were turning around and it was getting better but a few things recently really spiraled me back to square one and i feel totally lost again.

[@rokshanawilliams2870]

I didn't always have what I think is social anxiety, because I haven't actually been diagnosed, but I can relate to soo many of the signs and symptoms... It's crippling my life , my romantic relationship, and friendships.. I have no idea how to over come this problem and I reallyyy want to. I don't have anyone to talk to neither so saying it here is somewhat of a relief.

[@hearditfirst8010]

Same here, same boat. I find it easier to talk about it with strangers than ppl close to me. I'm more embarrassed of being judged by people close to me. If you ever need to talk or vent, let me know. I'm at the point of surrounding myself with like minded ppl

[@NICE-lv6kk]

suffering from the same problem 😥

[@lorasolomon5112]

Great video content, Very interesting and insightful. Love your channel...!

[@drali]

Thank you!

[@Kimberly34584]

This was incredibly helpful. In therapy I’ve never been completely honest about what coping skills help or hurt me. I feel like this caller was so clear that rehearsal was not effective and the direction changed immediately. I’ve always stated “idk I’ve never tried it but I could” or “it used to help in the past but I haven’t been doing it recently” making my therapist try to have me repeat good coping skills for others but not me. I’m open to anything at this point but still haven’t found a set of tools effective enough. This guy seems so knowledgeable I wish I could have him as my therapist. Thankfully I changed to a new one who I think is better but for my personal experience seeing the same person for years led to the same conversations everyday trying to do ineffective coping skills

[@kayla8192]

I have been going through these episodes this morning and I am so surprised to find something that relates to me. I’ve felt this way about my friends and roommates so intensely since Covid. I’ll also skip dinner because I don’t want to go out to get food and risk having conversations bc I don’t want to. I retreat to my room and prefer to go out with coworkers who I’m not really close with. I’m actually looking to move into a single apartment to remedy this and go to therapy. I’ve lived with one roommate for 6 years and a lot has to do with our personality differences but I’m shocked that it’s partially social anxiety.

[@Mushroom321-]

Yes!!, there is a mis conception. the same feeling can also be with even close relationships.

[@jazpl265]

I love how he articulated it so well! I related to many of the things he was describing, and hopefully, I'll do my own exposure therapy soon!

[@JW-qz4jl]

I have had social anxiety my whole life I guess, but after I caught Covid, it’s next level, I’ve never had anxiety like this, it’s getting better because I’m doing exposure things, and accepting

[@himan_shuu23]

I am 22 and currently suffering from this, I just don't know how to overcome it.

[@Elizabeth-yx2ti]

I was having depression and this constant, unbearable anxiety because of university stress. Not until I came across dr.chris356, a very intelligent mycologist.He saved my life honestly

[@MichalKolman]

I'm 32. I noticed the first ever such feeling when I was 16. It really ramped up starting age 21. Please don't end up like me 10 years later in a much worse situation. Try to deal with it with tools that you have and if it doesn't work within a year (and I mean really works in a big way), find professional help.

[@Elizabeth-yx2ti]

@@MichalKolman I got my help from dr.chris356,a very intelligent mycologist. He saved me honestly.

[@carolinewoolgar6457]

Love this!

[@franciscalillorazeto8338]

It helps to remind myself to be aware that they don’t really care as much as I do. In other words, I try to put myself in other people’s shoes and listen or watch what I say/do as an outsider and 90% of the times I realize that people don’t really care that much as I thought they would. I have had to learn I’m not the center of the universe 😂. But it’s so hard to silence the internal ‘voices’.

[@sachaschuler4150]

I've really identified myself to this guy's story because I'm exactly in the same situation even though my social anxiety started during the pandemic and got pretty damn bad since then

[@bbryanb2448]

Thank you for this video. I am even anxious when I comment online because one of my fears is my English.

[@drali]

Thank YOU for your kind comment!

[@goldielox1997]

I've been through traumatic experiences in my life which led me to realize that I have PTSD anxiety panic attacks - if I don't face the anxiety it runs me straight into social anxiety social phobia where I always think someone's judging me or watching me even when I go outside of my house I feel that someone's watching me.... Or I feel sometimes something bad is going to happen or some One is after me and when I think like that it gives me intense anxiety panic attack which makes me want to leave my job or even quit my job and run home that's how intense my anxiety phobia could be -- I've reached out for help and that's the best thing I could do for myself I never felt like this before these traumatic experiences - I've gotten married but sometime I feel that my wife has no idea what I go through mentally even when I tell her what I'm going through she hasn't never been through this type of experience so it's scares her or runs her away to the point where she wants divorce please pray for me and my marriage one day I'll get well and overcome these anxieties phobias PTSD experiences

[@jrd8782]

We have a lot in common

[@astridcifuentes6633]

Me too :( im trying to help myself with anxiety meds I bought on Amazon

[@sheikhsultana8653]

I am seriously having this situation And I m tired whatever symptoms u just described I have everything!

[@sheikhsultana8653]

I just want to recover from this situation

[@joerilla6975]

🙂 u try n establish Trust I would have gone about it differently more direct but I see your methods to help people and I appreciate that

[@hooman1910]

0:49-exactly! i was on my medication for more than an year now it didn’t even help me a bit! 1:04-since i was 9yrs old. One day at school my parents came to pick me up a lil bit early than from the actual school timings i was said to go downstairs with my backpack i packed my stuff and then suddenly i spaced out like idek what am doing right there but ik that i was upto something and i actually needed to leave the class but idk i just spaced out standing there still in the middle of the class and after a couple of mins my teacher said “wyd go downstairs your parents must be waiting” and then i got back to my senses and left the place. 1:24-after the pandemic colleges started and i actually needed to leave the house and go out. i haven’t attended my college a week STRAIGHT in the entire 2 year programme without a sick leave somedays i just used to stay home cuz i don’t face people saying i was sick. No worries i passed out with 94% (Grade-A)

[@sagargurung7122]

I am also having social anxiety, all the stuff he's experiencing are similar. I struggle going college and greet my college and i had presentation and i blackout and it got worst. I have been meditating and trying to do my best to and my mission right now is to overcome anxiety and be like happy and talk to people. I really want to have chat with people but its really hard😢

[@catherineclosser8103]

I beat myself up for having social anxiety because I want to be social and meet new people, try new places and go to the store without fear. The exposure therapy seems like a good way to retrain my brain to be social again, it'll be like pull-ups for the brain learning how to be confident socializing while taking your life back too.

[@sav3138]

i can’t stop over-thinking 🥴

[@user-mi2ks9so1q]

I just had my pre assessment for therapy and I swear you could have been speaking to me! The fear of being seen as stupid saying the wrong thing it’s resonates with me so strongly!

[@veronicaaa2269]

im going to college in a week and i cant even express how much listening to this helped me

[@peterpribula9989]

Year later I am exactly in your situation :D And I am convinced that after some time someone else will reply to me xD :D

[@kiano_84]

@@peterpribula9989 hi

[@jaylen6599]

u still have social anxiety

[@andrefierens3124]

Great ! Thank you Doctor Ali ! 🙂

[@drali]

Welcome!

[@earnestwilliams5272]

I needed this.

[@ApricotData474]

I can relate completely

[@brightside2389]

Hey there, Can you please talk or make a video about exposure therapy in its two forms (gradual and flooding). Hope to hear from you soon .. thanks

[@bethprather9241]

Wow Im in tears about the kid playing pianno.. That is how we can pray and see others in love like Jesus showed.. awesome

[@whiskycentral]

One thing I like to do is write down my fears and then write down a potential fix for the fear, and then the outcome I would bet money on (to help stop catastrophizing) and then write what this anxiety is trying to protect me from. I learned this from Struthless.

[@dawsoncarpenter2206]

Zoloft just made it 10 times harder and made me emotionless

[@dawsoncarpenter2206]

Adderall makes me feel sedated but it helps me focus. It makes me even more awkward

[@darrend267]

I have a problem shopping in stores. Walking past people, waiting for the cashier to scan my groceries. Talking to girls. My mind goes blank, shuts down. Even if I have a goal for the conversation, I feel like there needs to be a goal. I cant just have a conversation. Women equals sexual opportunities. People in general equals acceptance or a way out of a conversation at the least. I just stay quiet. How do I start to change?

[@KarthiK-ke7mr]

I'm sitting very comfortably inside my room all locked ,just hearing this video makes me fear a lot, I'm sweating so much, don't know why😳

[@ashdon1771]

Thank you Doc and Thank you Paul... This is so weird. I feel crippled mentaly and physically too. Going to work is dam hard interactions social, family work colleagues bosses. I have pushed them all away. I used to be the social metropolis and was the life and soul and brought people together but for the last 2 decades I realised I was just an imposter and suffer from chronic anxiety now. I lived for the moment not the future everyone around me has grown and left home progressed and acheived but I in my my mind was imprisoned and dont know where or who has the keys to set me free. I am a prisoner too and jist want to be freed and be present in the moment.. I dont know what the answer is but its so easy to give up... So please fight it fight it fight it. ❤..

[@sheikhsultana8653]

I desperately suffering this situations I just want to get out from here

[@PraveenSriram]

Same here and I work at west Cary Wegmans

[@Mushroom321-]

" anxiety increases our perception of threat " . Yes!!,

[@themme_fatale]

Also: peer support! There’s so much that can be learned from the recoveries of other people- strategies from people with lived experience

[@sleepdeprived930]

i thought i was the only one who’s more bothered by meeting ppl i already know than strangers

[@Alekito-qc7cg]

Nah bro my friend invites me every single Sunday to go to his house to play some games together and stuff but I tell him I can't and give some random excuse but when I have to go my hands Shake so much and I go crazy just think what would happen I something goes wrong. It's a terrible feeling but sadly I can't talk to anyone about it where I live cuz they just won't understand what it feels like

[@doremifacito4060]

Cheers :

[@doremifacito4060]

Same

[@thabanggaasenoe9053]

I messed up a promotion interview the other day, I haven't been able to sleep since, it really is crippling.😢

[@Bopsterjazz]

I could have made this call from the not wanting to leave the room to the tounge thing (I was born with it, and got it addressed when I was, like, 8) to the ADHD. . . Crazy! But anywho, I think this was pretty helpful!

[@keturahwilkerson6594]

Accepting that humans are not logical helps. As someone who is usually a nice person, it drove me crazy knowing that there are people who don't like me regardless of what I do and vice versa... Also, understanding s.a. can only be tackled by putting yourself in social situations that are seen as a high chance of rejection can do wonders on building self-esteem. THE ONLY WAY OUT IS THROUGH! Praying for everyone who is suffering through this 🙏

[@counsellortroy]

Totally identify with this