Tazing My Friend For Funsies (w/ Sequoia Holmes) | Perfect Person Ep. 27

[@soph4508]

omg please please PLEASE bring sequoia back for another episode sometime. her advice and insights were so valuable, like the apology language ! hello ? great episode

[@natalianavarro5261]

I would love to have a segment where people call back and update us on their situation/ if they did or didn’t take your advice. Did couples stay together? Etc.

[@LittleLessTalentless]

The talk about "suits" in LA like he wasn't 1000% talking about the elephant in the room. I was dying

[@eqrahabibi]

This is the comment I was looking for lol

[@allstar14218]

Omg I loved Sequoia as the sidekick this week. She was great, what a lovely episode! ^^

[@inacityalone]

sequoia is always so ridiculously cool, big love to her 🫶

[@PerfectPerson]

If you saw the Patreon exclusive cold open before it was edited out... no you didnt. 🤫

[@heatherfeather1203]

what cold open

[@sydney4377]

What cold open?? 😉😉

[@literarymary4933]

I didn’t see it. On an unrelated note, smelling like subway is tough. 🥪😤

[@missthistleberry6130]

Hmmmm, makes me want that patreon content more!! I loved it

[@Abby_cat47]

Totally did 😂

[@KimbiW]

Re: late boyfriend: girl, the reason you’re still upset is because you realized (at least subconsciously) that your bf doesn’t respect or prioritize you. He couldn’t even text you to say that he was going to be AN HOUR LATE. Then he had a BS excuse. Did he even take you out to dinner (or at least on a different night, bc you might be tired and/or celebrating with the cast after) after??? You haven’t received closure on these issues because you have discussed the actual issue

[@peacechickification]

100%. He brought gifts thinking that he can have his cake and eat it too. She’s totally allowed to not accept the apology, and imo, she shouldn’t.

[@delaneykeller1389]

@@peacechickification the thing is he already had the gifts! They weren't "I'm sorry I fucked up" gifts. They were "congrats on your show!" gifts. And truly the fact that she texted him 10 minutes before curtain and he knew he'd be an hour late and only mentioned it once he was reached out to. He should have let her know the minute he wasn't on the road when he knew he should have been. The laundry just sounds like a bullshit excuse. Even if he was in the middle of it, take your wet laundry to your damn apartment and dry it later. It's not ideal but better than being an hour late to your girlfriend's show. The more I think about this the angrier I get 😂

[@lavaniyatirgar]

oh my godd ikrrr, as a psychology student, i had all of this andd so much more to say, i became all sorts of upset on her behalf like the rest of the replies too because yes, the relationship panics stem from these unconscious feels only, that after knowing each other for so long, if you dont know how the other person's feeling, or if they're upset, or how important they are to you, you dont prioritise them andd he kept mentioning how excited he was for months too so he just ruined her whole performance a bit, like dimmed her excitement and made her nervous stilll and it's been so long it makes her feel was he lying before or what changed and just, yeah, people panic when these things happen because also if she's scared to talk about it to him, in fear of potentially upsetting himm even more, there's the problem is this the relationship you really want and yeah, sorry for rambling i justt want her to feel better, she was so sweet and the whole thing was only that it's not that she wanted him to feel more bad ofc it's just that he didnt feel all that bad in the first place that is soo so hurtful

[@alexiswatts649]

I was an RA and I can confirm that like 90% of us were scholarship dependent broke kids at a private school desperate for free housing. We had to hype up our desire to guide young college people to get the job when really we just wanted to stay in our free rooms and talk to no one when it wasn’t required 😅

[@clerbie]

PREACH! this was me 2! I went to every building "event" my freshman year JUST so my RA and the building director would know me by name, so when i applied to be an RA, i would get an easy reference and pushed through the process. But once i was an RA i was like CRAP i dont want to deal with these cray kids. My room was bomb though! I had a corner double to myself, with 2 beds i pushed together, with my own bathroom #kindaworthit though i quit after one year LOL

[@Cashhhhew]

I know this comment is old but I just have to share with someone that my freshman year RA met a boy in Mexico on a long weekend and never came back. She full up ghosted, left all of her belongings and the college had no clue until winter break. She did this in like September and we partieeeed lmao. One girl also got a puppy on our floor and another was giving stick and poke tattoos for cash lmao. Edit: I’m now realizing this sounds like a true crime case but we confirmed she was living her best life with her new boo thing.

[@PokhrajRoy.]

Omg Sequoia is a great addition to the Podcast! She’s great fun! 👏🏽

[@hconf]

The apology language piece is gold!!! I went and took a quiz for it and then was reading my results and thought oh my goodness this would be helpful for that one caller... Forgetting of course this is where I found out about the concept in the first place 🤗🥴

[@lavaniyatirgar]

oml so precious of you awh! 😭

[@radiowolf.13]

As someone who was a somewhat closeted emo/anime middle school kid in 2007 and is now very loud and proud about it in 2023, I 100% relate to and appreciate the whole conversation going on at the start of the pod

[@alexisreve1]

Love the apology language suggestion, just took the test. For anyone wondering, the five options are: Accept Responsibility, Planned Change, Make Restitution, Expressing Regret, Request Forgiveness

[@alaytheaherr]

Miles advice on how to deal with "suits" was sending meeeeee! ppl need to talk about how gaslighting is a necessary skill in any career. there are so many ppl i had to learn to "talk around". you have to 100% make whatever you want to happen seem like it's their idea.

[@hconf]

I love how you went from defending the annoying guy to jumping so hard on him. That was wonderful

[@boullioncube389]

For the performer and the late BF...Ask him to buy his own ticket to see the show again and BE ON TIME.

[@channingbushman5346]

Honestly I would LOVE Miles’ reccs for the “perfect” items!!! I love being intentional about the stuff I get but hate the mental energy of finding it

[@andyqv-goodvibes1900]

as a perfectionist nothing tickles me more than a good personality/psychology test so THANK YOU for bringing apology languages to my attention!! super interesting. immediately paused and took the test and shared with a friend who is into this stuff too. love this pod

[@lavaniyatirgar]

ikrr, as a psychology student, i already knew mine, just didnt know there was a quiz too and like, lovee quizzes so it was so nicee😭

[@shamaramill]

Sequoia was a great guest and gave great advice. I hope that you have her again.

[@naxp42]

Finding a perfect microfiber cloth or sponge is SUCH A VIRGO ENERGY Miles 😍😍

[@heatherfeather1203]

The way we have been gifted with the exclusive cold open 👀✨

[@PerfectPerson]

🤫

[@Polk]

Great guest and really appreciated the discussion about apology languages. I thought that was some of the most poignant information discussed on the podcast, and it wasn't even in the Getting Real section!

[@elishao473]

Sequoia was right, she really is that girl

[@Lexmadison]

I’ve always heard about sequoia through the grape vine (kelsey) and she’s such a treat!

[@theyJC]

her guest spots on Guilt Pleasures are my favorite eps, she’s great!

[@xgreydovex]

Sending all the good vibes and I hope the Bonsignore clan is healthy and doing great. Thanks for still releasing content while I’m sure you guys are in the middle of newborn chaos.

[@zerocraic3966]

Feel compelled to mention that there are schools where the RAs, being fellow students and all, do not do anything surrounding snitching and having drugs or drinks in a dorm room are not their biggest interest. My college had residential houses where the RAs were basically just adult cheerleaders who organized stuff and made snacks and let us vent after frat parties. There’s something so fucked up to me about the other kind where kids police kids.

[@diamonddee8842]

If I hear ya'll bang.... I'm taking the TP as payment 🤣🤣🤣

[@brandygreen865]

The Waldon Books reference RIP Waldon & Borders!! Miss those bookstores.

[@burgerquestoflove]

Billy Talent is still in my top five favorite bands and I'm in my thirties! Yes Miles!!

[@user-gj4ez6qj2z]

Miles even if you dislike suits, to assume people are inherently uncreative is well, unfounded.

[@georgiakuchinsky]

Hearing Miles mention Billy Talent gave me WHIPLASH. That is a canadian staple of noughties pop punk culture.

[@natl2042]

Miles, king. I WILL NOT TOLLERATE THE KIRKLAND SIGNATURE SLANDER

[@natl2042]

The amount of time I’ve spent listening to my dad talk about rainx is crazy😂

[@juliacoves5873]

Sequoia is the best, bring her back!!

[@ria3017]

It is just crazy how much you don’t realize is not normal, so thank you for doing this Miles! I wish I would’ve had this when I was younger, it probably would’ve saved a couple years of my life, save a lot of trauma

[@Heydoesanybodywannalaugh]

The second (3rd?) caller’s boyfriend is EXACTLY like my older brother. The guy knows the dates and times to show up, but he is perpetually late. Anxiety and depression are both factors with my brother. That’s why he leaves the laundry to the very last second.

[@keraleak3990]

Adhd makes me so blind to time and how long things take. It also screws with prioritizing. I feel for the bf but that doesn’t make it ok.

[@Heydoesanybodywannalaugh]

@@keraleak3990 I get it. I’m 45, and my brother is 8 years older than I am. In my 20’s and 30’s I made a real effort to remind my brother several days in advance of an occasion and the day before just to be safe. Didn’t help, so I stopped. I couldn’t be his planner. These days we start everything without him; if he’s late, his food is cold.

[@heatherfeather1203]

Just sat down with my coffee, stellar timing dude! Hope you’re enjoying paternity leave! :)

[@juliacoves5873]

Miles calling highschool a caste system 😂

[@kathleenuclear]

root beer floats are so so good, but I have a soft spot for orange soda with vanilla ice cream because it tastes like a creamsicle

[@hannahcollins7691]

i put this episode on while getting ready for work and it was the perfect partner this morning ❤️

[@emilyf4178]

I love the emo talk. I just saw MCR in September and my emo kid heart was singing.

[@MichelleZB1]

Being worries about being called a poser is SUCH a mid 2000s worry 😂😂 I literally laughed out loud because I've talked to my therapist extensively about the worries of kid me being a poser hahahaha

[@biancacolmenares620]

So for the annoying guy, isn’t he not actually a suit, but a student who is supposed to pay the role of a suit? Is he just trying to be involved, but ultimately not in a helpful way? Maybe redirect him to something he can do?

[@emmyemu33]

Omg Billy Talent I freaking love them! Great band!

[@skyyeater9195]

I love this podcast! They are so fun to listen to! Sequoia was a great guest! Not that the previous haven’t been, this one just hit different

[@soph4081]

omg i googled apology languages IMMEDIATELY

[@catlover4319]

Can you make another podcast just with sequoia because i love her SO MUCH!! I want to listen to her give more advice

[@CrystalFireBaby]

The boyfriend situation. He didn't leave until she texted him....I hope he is just extremely dense and legitimately ignorant.

[@zoeruhl7525]

Miles you had the exact same high-school experience, it's weird. I went to a quaker school that my mom taught at, only reason i could afford it. Had deep family trauma, too. And also a huge anime manga nerd

[@Gabrielles108]

Thank you Miles for the validation of being the worried middle schooler

[@hconf]

You went to a quaker school!?!? That's so cool. Love the Quakers

[@thepuppydog26]

Longest cold open ever!!! I love it, lmao

[@blinkfilms1]

More sequoia on the pod please!!

[@simplicitylost]

So I could totally see Miles as a tall skinny emo kid. He would’ve fit into that cliché see well! It’s crazy to imagine how different people’s lives might be if they’d just grown up in a different area and gone to a different school.

[@harrytodhunter5078]

In the UK, Miles is known as Kilometres Goodsir

[@maddygillette6848]

"in a few words you can make your partner feel better" my god, thank you for putting into words why my last relationship went they way it did. AHHHHH lol

[@striffleric]

38:31 i fucking cackled

[@alaytheaherr]

MILES! we are so the same. i also liked anime and emo but couldn't embrace it because i was terribly embarrassed!!!! absolutely love ppl reclaiming things they couldn't fully enjoy when they were young

[@abundantlyariel]

29:23 SEQUOIA THAT IS A HORROR MOVIE WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

[@LawnOrnament]

Talking about Gerard Way still being a crazy energetic performer reminds me of when we saw Slipknot two or three years ago and a 48 year old Corey Taylor did a whole ass backflip off a set piece at their show like it was NOTHING!! I was blown away. And he sings with so much power like it’s easy. Must be that wide-ass neck of his💀💀🤣

[@Davinana44]

Miles I will not stand for the Kirkland toilet paper slander. That stuff is quality at an excellent price.

[@erinhenze]

I heard Sequoia talk and immediately went “Dinosaur Mom!”

[@EmGa11ant]

We got the special cold open 😮

[@ashleighmack9318]

yasssssssssssss posted 7 mins ago sitting at my work from home desk like this 👁👄👁

[@tdgonz4532]

I always wanted a subscription for Shonen Jump and my parents said no bc my step dad was the cool kid growing up and anime/manga was not cool. I totally feel like I didn’t get to be my authentic cringy middle school self 🥺 now my kids are into it and me and my husband are so excited!

[@connerolmedo888]

Sequoia and I are wearing the same shirt!

[@melbapeach162]

Gerard BUTLER of My Chemical Romance 😭

[@roadrider_2771]

Love this show so much 🥰

[@chidera9005]

Guys everyone should listen to Black People Love Paramore!! It’s very funny!!!

[@diamonddee8842]

I've had my inlaws say they've heard a stray cat ( me!!!) Insinuating that

[@findparadise]

I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT BILLY TALENT. Taking me straight back to high school

[@gir21212]

The my chem shirt 🥰

[@nadiadeva7676]

YAY NEW EPPPP

[@elka_shmelk]

you could say your education at the quaker school was, in a way, gratis….on the company.

[@tiannaalvarado5672]

On the grandparent comment: my son calls my dad Tatita and calls my mom Oma😅

[@TheShauNanigans]

We called my great grandmother Oma, and my sister and cousins had their kids call our grandparents Oma and Opa. So I know that's German. Where does Tatita come from?

[@tiannaalvarado5672]

@@TheShauNanigansmy dads full Mexican and they called his grandpa Tatita which is like little grandpa and my dad looks the most like him so my son calls him tht 😂

[@TheShauNanigans]

@@tiannaalvarado5672 Aw. That's super sweet. I thought it might be somewhere South or Central America, but wasn't sure where. Thanks for answering!

[@mollyross888]

i had a nana and a babci (polish word for grandmother)

[@amandajunecesarano7423]

I wonder if the boyfriend as like undiagnosed ADHD. The fact that he bought her flowers and chocolate shows that he was planning on going and is supporting her but might have very poor time management skills

[@rougesunset]

I have that MCR shirt!

[@alyssabeanz02]

Hi Miles!

[@cozieswithkritta]

Watching this waiting for surgery

[@KarleighSantry]

look... i just wanted the free room & board.

[@nataliedreww7585]

The south VERY DIFFERENT I went to school in a small town and only maybe three emo kids were there… it was bad . Especially the Christians 😭

[@ProfessorDragonHat]

Anime and emo go hand in hand

[@alexandramotzan]

I love Garrett so much and he’s so hot, but his lady… takes the cake ❤😮

[@ES.Evergreen]

A "silent unspoken agreement" is *NOT* an agreement at all 🤷‍♀Just a life rule.

[@elrondofrivendell3672]

As a former RA...ouch

[@Danesha_M_H]

20:36 college roommates are weird af.

[@EmGa11ant]

Oh heyyy❤

[@gavintrent4818]

Is my name on the spreadsheet yet?

[@lorensolomon1419]

Miles why!!

[@Payton-Deese]

I WILL SAY: it is really strange to see how public opinions have shifted over the years toward Japanese entertainment (i.e. manga, anime, J-POP, etc.) when it is SEEMINGLY being embraced *just now* by the same crowd(s) having shamed lovers of such content and media. Funny stuff.

[@Payton-Deese]

People love what’s popular duh. But it’s just kinda fucked up when people get made fun of for liking something unproblematically

[@Payton-Deese]

Also? Such a public opinion is being fostered and facilitated by (wealthy) western, white audiences who THEN proceed to make fun of entertainment from cultures different from their own? Yeah. Ew.

[@Payton-Deese]

Make fun of, make fun of liking, make light out of*

[@Payton-Deese]

Final thought: my freshman roommate from college ended up an RA. Y’all already know

[@CherryBlossomXX93]

Petition to make Sequoia a permanent co-host... 💕

[@alexrudie3538]

Omg teen flashbacks...paramour, my chemical romance, monthly shonen jump subscriptions, Naruto, yuyuhakusho, toonami and adult swim...

[@kathihansen2381]

Am I the only one who feels like the late boyfriend thing is kinda exaggerated? Idk I feel like people make mistakes and he obviously has shown that he feels remorse. If even after the all the effort he put into apologizing, as she described, she still feels bitter about it, she might have to do a deep dive into her feelings to find out what made her so upset about it. Because quite frankly to me it sounds like there's something below the surface, for her to give so much relevance to such a comparatively minor mistake, especially if he has sincerely expressed that he is sorry.