Portal 2 - All Wheatley Quotes

Here it is, FINALLY! Sorry it took longer than expected. This video was HUGE!!!
Next week: "Portal 2 - All Cave Johnson Quotes"!

[@twitterusersarefreakingstu2200]

You could tell that the voice actor for Wheatley was having a blast.

[@-Poka-]

He is such a great voice actor :D

[@harrisonofcolorado8886]

Wheatley is half the reason why I love Portal 2.

[@LegoLover-kz5cx]

I believe Stephen Merchant has a blast with whatever role he does either Wheatley from Portal or Tracy from Tooth Fairy with Dwayne Johnson. Comedy is seriously his thing.

[@hannaautisticbananas8283]

@@harrisonofcolorado8886 me too 😝

[@Howlingburd19]

@@harrisonofcolorado8886 Wheatley is one of the MANY MANY reasons why Portal 2 is one of the greatest games of all time :)

[@pixel4901]

Very minor case of serious brain damage

[@astral-p1823]

But don't be alarmed, alright? Although, if you do feel alarm, try to hold onto that feeling because that is the proper reaction to being told you have brain damage.

[@rebelrailz.]

@@astral-p1823 ('Ello, Wheatley! I just wanted to talk to ya. Hoping things are okay in space.. Like your channel name!)

[@astral-p1823]

@@rebelrailz. Yeah... Since SHE banished me, it's been a little lonely... and annoying, with that other lunatic core up here!

[@rebelrailz.]

@@astral-p1823 I wouldn't doubt it.. I wish that someone would rescue you and bring you back to Earth. You're my favorite core!

[@astral-p1823]

@@rebelrailz. I just want to get a chance to apologize to her, you know! Though she probably wouldn't forgive me...

[@Atlantis720]

13:57 *hEy bUdDy, I’m SpEaKiNg In An AcCeNt ThAt Is BeYoNd HeR rAnGe Of HeArInG!*

[@soapytacosbaconnwaffles353]

That one's my favorite! 😊

[@TheRealCamster1987]

Lol

[@johannesfruseth6587]

Metal ball, I CAN hear you.

[@GummyGummzy]

John Fruz Run! I don’t need to do the voice! Run!

[@lachyness]

How did you make a completely empty comment!? I can’t see anything

[@softjasper543]

sir thats my emotional support bastard

[@a.person1805]

Moron*

[@pyIorus]

baby*

[@birdboy1092]

Same. I literally talk to my Wheatley plush for ADVICE.

[@sansational15]

I talk to mine a lot too. If I feel sad he's the only one I feel completely comfortable with opening up to him.

[@Glyyee]

I have 1000 + hours in portal 2 purely because of Wheatley

[@vulplupi1164]

33:23 "and everything is gonna be fine..." "SHUT UP!"

[@TheRealCamster1987]

Lol

[@---pj1xz]

My last 2 braincells during a test

[@vladimirvikentije5202]

Me to myself

[@RuskySevmor]

Me in the mirror 5 seconds later:

[@speedymatt1236]

I think we’re in trouble…

[@squeguinquack2570]

“I’m still holding all of the cards, and guess what? They’re all full houses”

[@libnnyann]

The PUPPET MASTER! I have the strings....amd the cards. On one hand, the strings and the other, cards. Still a full house.

[@eliminator152]

Ace of fours. Best hand. Unbeatable.

[@Mary-eo5qb]

46:31

[@Pixelusually]

@@eliminator152 *as I imagine*

[@scarletbasilisk4138]

Wheatley: *says he dispises chell* Wheatley: *calls her luv in nearly every other sentence*

[@indeepjable]

Power Overwhelming Can Cause This. Completely Different Things

[@Unitato152]

When was that?

[@cerwyn123]

its a british thing

[@parepidemosproductions4741]

@@cerwyn123 if this is the basis of the fanfic surrounding their relationship, I'm a little disappointed. this fanbase is smarter than that😅

[@parepidemosproductions4741]

@Maskr bloodwyle hmmmm

[@asexyilluminatiinacupcake9288]

Chell : Oh look a bird ! Wheatley : 13:12 GLaDOS : KILL IT ! IT'S EVIL !

[@bossgamerj985]

Bird, Bird, Bird, Bird,Brid Biiird! kill kil, kill it! it's eviiiil!!

[@PuristTheSpecter]

Alternatively: 25:38

[@amethyst4578]

@@PuristTheSpecter cAw CaW

[@butterss1178]

Chell:.....

[@harrisonofcolorado8886]

Chell probably wouldn't be saying anything since she's mute. If she can, then it's probably in an accent that's beyond our range of hearing.

[@localsouthside4033]

I love how GLaDOS’ lines only took 20 minutes, while lovable Wheatley here talks for an hour straight. “It’s just makin’ me stronger, luv!”

[@bagofmoss4710]

Idk why but it makes me happy when he calls Chell/The Player ‘love’ I know it’s part of the accent and it’s just how he talks but I just find it sweet.

[@Uuan1000]

​@@bagofmoss4710me too

[@weelolol]

probably because he has way more idle lines and special lines for secrets

[@manipuratheobjectthingy2015]

58:35 NOBODY'S GOING TO SPACE MATE!!

[@anistrashcan8536]

Hate to break it to you, buuut.....

[@qwerty3793]

I know I'm late, but I just love how the writers handled Wheatley's dialogue regarding foreshadowing and hints for the player. The line "look at your precious human moon, cause it cannot help you now" won't be heard unless you, the player, wait for a bit after the final battle, which usually means you are stuck on what to do to finish the game (unless you just want to hear the dialogue of course). The writers also did this earlier with the turret facility destruction, where Wheatley eventually figures out how to sabotage the production line, but only after giving the player a good amount of time to try to figure it out on their own - so if you're completely stuck you can get help without needing to look up a walkthrough. These delayed hints make the game more accessible overall without making it condescending/annoying for more experienced players.

[@westbrooke1174]

He sounds like Gordon Ramsay

[@schleepy6362]

I read somewhere that that line was actually an unscripted outburst by Stephen Merchant (Wheatley’s VC) While hearing Nolan North do his lines for Space Core. The staff thought it was so funny they had to work it into the game, that’s why Space is the only core that talks after being attached to Wheatley XD

[@teaganwillier-lauck638]

Reminds me of if Undertale was realistic snas.

[@husk_xrl5511]

It makes me depressed to think that Wheatly is forever floating in space. Like put yourself where he is. Floating to nowhere, going to nowhere, and never stopping The only person to talk to is a core that won't listen. Hoping that one day you'll end up back on earth, wishing you could say sorry to the one person you screwed up to. Honestly, it makes me want to cry, and I usually don't cry. Sorry if I got you depressed if he's your favorite character.

[@froggsacct]

my favorite character is the space core.

[@WouldntWeather]

Atlas_luvs_testing Read Blue Sky by Waffleguppies if you want a Wheatley redemption story.

[@napoleonsolo5929]

SPAAAAAAAACE!!

[@lrr138]

TBH Wheatley is probably better off in Space than whatever GLaDOS would do to him.

[@husk_xrl5511]

lradford22 True

[@jansenart0]

13:53 he started laughing when he said "mate", you can hear it in his nose. Could barely select a splice before the laughter, I'm sure.

[@lightlytoastedrye]

No. They do these lines like a hundred times, this was probably his final attempt of many. And when i say many, i mean many.

[@valco9507]

He was about to start laughing.

[@therock1160]

nose?

[@IndependentOreo]

@@therock1160 yes

[@thegoatcarnival]

He’s being smug, the laughter is naturally fitting.

[@bruhmoment7931]

Weatly should of said there’s portal 3 in that pit

[@DestructoGabe8]

Portal reloaded: hold my time travel portal

[@stephaniecourteoreille5972]

I would've fell for it

[@Rainbow-lr9uy]

JUMPP!!

[@dioddie1412]

That's where the portal reloaded 3 way gun came from

[@speedymatt1236]

@@DestructoGabe8Hello again!

[@Jagerbombb]

My sibling loves wheatly, and i waited for her to walk into the room and played the “hello”, she froze

[@ereince]

It would scare the crap out of me if I was her.

[@Jagerbombb]

Ereince it did

[@iamworm7252]

That's cute as fuck and you're an amazing person for doing that

[@Jagerbombb]

Sad cat Thank you. I only did it for a laugh. The reaction was priceless

[@sansational15]

That is AWESOME!

[@nothajzl]

19:37 you can hear someone laughing in the background. Probably the sound guys :D

[@ThatSmilingTophat]

Apti Newim Omg that’s kinda creepy, actually...

[@pumpkinpierose2726]

Hard to hear

[@titavaughns7698]

Omg! That's so cute

[@1classikai]

Omg at first I thought it was just one of those weird noises that sometimes play during/after a line but it's *actual laughter* And the fact that he continues with "So... what's your view on that? :)" even *while the sound guys are still laughing* just makes it 10000x better XD

[@bobross7793]

ツSmiley scary who funny he is

[@einstwareinlicht]

19:38 You can hear the staff laughing. Absolutely wasn't expecting this at all.

[@CinnamintBerry]

Yeah you're right. I heard the faint laughter

[@civetbutt]

Huh ive never noticed that before!!

[@wheatley-uz7mm]

I only noticed it when i put my headphones to max volume lol

[@RuskySevmor]

I heard it too

[@Howlingburd19]

Holy shit, you’re right! I’ve played this game soooooo many times, and I’ve never noticed that!

[@Al_Rey]

33:02 this line still makes me believe that Wheatley's betrayal wasn't entirely his fault. Yes, he probably felt a bit angry towards Chell for all the things he said at 53:38, but I think being in the body made him paranoid, like it was "hard wired into the system". The body or the system amplified his anger and vengefulness-- including his urge to keep testing. Even GlaDos became a bit nicer when she was out of that body (and not just because she was a miserable little potato). And Wheatley just reverted back to his old moronic (but not evil) self at the end credits, and he wanted to apologize rather than swearing revenge if he ever meets Chell again.

[@thehalolegend9235]

Wow... this makes me even more depressed that he is stuck in space

[@dorkork]

Wow

[@Mrbluefire95]

The mainframe was a corrupted system, and compounded with Wheatley’s programming, made a deadly combination. It was only with GLaDOS regaining her Caroline persona did she overcome the mainframe and let Chell go.

[@NICKatronMC]

53:38 The way he’s talking really hits, god now I feel like we betrayed him instead

[@NICKatronMC]

These lines help your point 40:39 I’m not a *monster* 1:01:50 I was bossy and *monstrous*

[@courtallison98]

50:47 Well Well Well, Welcome...... TO MY LAIR!

[@gomaplayzyt3603]

Courtney Clontz xD

[@sansational15]

Chell and a potato, huh?

[@sansational15]

@Upgraded ron ?? So you're the ones who wanna take me out? Ahaha, good luck!

[@solarial2008]

You're kidding me. You gotta be!

[@yevenik7242]

That fact that the world record for this game is shorter than all of Wheatley's quotes amazes me

[@birdboy1092]

But why would you speed run, when you can listen to his amazing voice?

[@fgfoxy1987]

2:44 " AND WHO'S FAULT IS IT GOING TO BE WHEN MANAGEMENT COMES DOWN HERE AND FINDS 10,000 FLIPPING VEGETABLES!!!??!!!" my favorite lol

[@tailsfan11westandwithukraine]

I’ve been trying to figure out unsuccessfully what he meant by that the last five years. I mean, vegetables?

[@oceanman7176]

he's talking about the brain damaged test subjects in the relaxation chambers

[@soontobechannel743]

@@tailsfan11westandwithukraine “vegetable” is sometimes used as a word to mean someone who’s basically (and sometimes, like in this case, literally) brain dead such as if they were to be lobotomized, the word “vegetated state” also means the same thing.

[@Jam-kk2ne]

58:22 He sounds like he’s about to cry 😞

[@ohgreatheavens1]

I feel so bad for him 😭

[@sansational15]

He desperately needs a hug, that would make him feel better.

[@dr.feelgood6795]

he a robot

[@amethyst4578]

@@dr.feelgood6795 bruh

[@dr.feelgood6795]

@@amethyst4578 okay whatever you say, Amethyst is the purple color variety of quartz and has been used in personal adornment for over 2000 years. It is the birthstone of February and an important New Age gem. Amethyst is used to produce faceted stones, cabochons, beads, tumbled stones, and many other items for jewelry and ornamental use. this you?

[@mememan3447]

If I were Chell, and I heard Wheatley’s apology, I would forgive him, but I would remind him that I’m never gonna plug him into anything more powerful than a phone charger

[@lmahu6627]

I don't think he would mind that, actually. Having the constant urge to tests via the mainframe's influence (something that the devs compared to a drug addiction) was probably a burden to him.

[@CopShowGuy]

42:31 Chapter 9: The Part Where He Kills You. Achievement unlocked: "The Part Where He Kills You"

[@bobross7793]

CopShowGuy Glados: this is the part where he kills us the achievement description: this is the part

[@stupid-idiot-555]

Bob Ross song: the part where he kills you

[@teadrinkingwarlock5101]

"Well, this is the part where he kills us!" "Hello, this is the part where I kill you." Chapter 9: The Part Where He Kills You. Achievement unlocked: The Part Whe He Kills You.

[@bobross7793]

Warlock Hatman song: the part where he kills you

[@CopShowGuy]

@@teadrinkingwarlock5101 And then he doesn't kill you because he is a moron.

[@Optimus_Primes_hips]

54:10 he’s trying so hard to convince himself that Chell hates him to make it easier for him to try and hate her. Especially as he sounds like he’s crying at the time and later says how much he hates you, which I don’t think he does. He just wants to hate Chell to make it easier to kill her and remove his guilt and justify him trying to kill her. By antagonising her, he can make himself feel better and help him block out any doubts or insecurities about his actions or himself. I don’t think he ever hated Chell or wanted to kill her, I think he was driven to it by the body he’s in and it’s programming. Moreover I think it’s much more likely that he actually hated himself or was incredibly insecure, as in the end credits he’s seen admitting to his faults and massively screwing up to the one person he had in his life. His insecurities are further shown when he infers multiple times that he relies and depends on Chell. He was probably just trying to prove to himself that he’s capable of achieving something, all while his new facility is literally crashing and burning around him. At the end of the boss fight he knew that there was no hope in saving himself or the facility, he just continued to blame Chell for everything. Deep down though I think he knew all along that he couldn’t really do anything on his own, but was trying to himself and the people around him that he wasn’t worthless. At the end he’s seen wanting to apologise to Chell and only Chell, showing that he cared for her deeply and obsessed over her. Before he says that it’s Chells fault, he acknowledges Glad0s, but doesn’t pin anything onto her, due to his obsession with Chell and his world seeming to revolve around her. He wants to place everything on Chell without acknowledging that he’s the only constant in the equation. He knows that he’s in the wrong, but desperately doesn’t want to believe it to prove his worth to himself, and more importantly Chell. He even says at one point that he ‘doesn’t want to see her hurt herself like this’. This could him lying to stop her using the conversion gel obviously. But it could also be him worrying about her dying a more painful slow death via infection or something, rather than getting blown up or mashed to death. He’s obviously very nervous and insecure, with he’s constant stuttering, need for attention and constantly having to remind himself of his own ‘good qualities’, qualities that he doesn’t have but desperately wants to have (like being smart or cunning). He knows he’s not smart and was literally designed to be stupid, but still wants and tries to be something smart. To, once again, prove himself to himself, and Chell (as he’s never seen referring to Glad0s when talking like that). He has very little self worth and craves reassurance and validation from those around him to make himself feel ok. His actions at the end of the game are a mix of blind emotion of anguish, his own stupidity and the chasé. In some ways it’s his fault and he deserves what he got in the end, but in others it isn’t.

[@carlospomares3225]

Nice analysis!

[@Wasabipeaprince]

god you're making me cry

[@sketchedbees7445]

56:06 for the 'don't want to see her hurting herself like this' line

[@Uuan1000]

If you think about it, Wheatley never really was a bad person, and was never even evil... Throughout most of the game when your with him, he is your friend! Even in the mainframe... Let me list all the "bad" things he has done, and disprove any wrong doings... #1 Is calling humans smelly... #2 Is throwing us down the pit to Old Aperture... #3 Is bossing us around / testing us... #4 Is the reasonless insults... #5 is basically just Chapter 9: The part where he doesn't kill chell... Now #1 That is just anything a robot would say, and let's be honest he is right... #2 This is simply just a fit of rage that GLaDOS caused, because, she's GLaDOS... #3 All of that is simply because of the URGE to test, created by the Mainframe... #4 All of the insults are just attempts to get us to test better. Because it seemed to work well for GLaDOS... #5 Wheatley is the "Dumbest moron who ever lived" and was "Specifically designed to make bad decisions" Now, tell me how good of a decision it is to try and kill the person who never seems to die... it isn't is it. And he could have just chucked Chell down a bottomless pit with the Faith Plates, but he didn't because he wanted to see you die, which sounds cool I know, but he wanted to make sure you had a quick death that wasn't so painful... And eventually he gives you the OPTION of death, rather than it being a trap, for both of their sake... And everything he said in the boss fight was an attempt to get himself to hate Chell, so he wouldn't feel as bad about killing her... And EVEN THEN he still manages to show his care for us, (I'm guessing you can figure out how) In the last moments Chell sees him, he tries to convince Chell to let go because he's an idiot... and when he finally snapped back into reality, he tries to convince Chell to "HOLD ON!" and that he can fix everything... But, GLaDOS Rip's that opportunity away from him too quickly... And at the VERY end there's no reason for you to believe that his apology wasn't genuine... He is stuck in space with no one to talk to... (Other than a core who doesn't even care...) Why would he be lying?

[@lmahu6627]

One thing to add about Wheatley's relationship with Chell is how GLaDOS described it during the co-op campaign; she noticed the closeness of Atlas and P-body's friendship, and commented that she knows only one other friendship that was much closer, between an "imbecile [she] had to destroy" and someone she would rather not talk about in length.

[@Unitato152]

Timestamps of the many times he calls Chell "love" cuz I find it adorable 52:16 52:41 56:28

[@RandomPerson-zj7ke]

I know it's just cute

[@artsyika]

He's so adorable and charming makes me upset I'll never get to see him in game again :(

[@v.v365]

It sucks that the only times he called her “Love” is when he’s evil

[@PearlOfIncandescence]

I was a bit confused on the last one whether he was referring to Chell or GLaDOS... Works both ways I think XD

[@charleston5455]

Unitato Productions thankyou :)

[@ehehahfarhgha]

If you listen really closely during his boss fight lines, you can hear him trying not to cry. (No I did not find this out by myself, I’m just relaying information)

[@someoneyoumightremember6630]

Then it’ll be two morons trying not to cry while fighting.

[@millie6471]

especially the “and you couldn’t even let me have that, could you?” line. lit rally almost brought me to tears

[@soilology]

fuuuckkk this is why I love wheatley and stephen merchants acting. wheatley is such a good character. i wanna kiss him

[@a.person1805]

I feel so sorry for him. Forced to fight one of his only and best friends from a failed attempt to help said friend. Just trying not to think about it so that he wont be sad. ):

[@NICKatronMC]

I assume the mainframe amplified a core’s anger and so even though some of his statements are a bit exaggerated or incorrect Some of them are actually on point, and it hurts so goddamn much

[@visiblycxnfused4650]

57:38 Wheatley successfuly hacking is so cute to see, he just sounds so happy about it :]

[@galactaofthestars9236]

Yeah

[@pinkraven4402]

When did it appeared during the game?

[@joejs4613]

Jan Lewandowski when you fight him at the end

[@sock4904]

AWWW I LOVE HIM HNNGJDNF THE SMILE I HAD ON MY FACE AS I LISTENED TO THAT

[@bagofmoss4710]

Yeah that was really adorable to hear, he got so happy and it made me smile

[@popsicIes]

13:51 reasons to love wheatley: this whole conversation

[@birdboy1092]

Boi, you should love Wheatley no Matter what.

[@comic12558]

Birdboy109 Bird yes

[@DaxAxeOffical]

I just wanna hug him

[@sock4904]

epic gamer don't we all 💔💔💔

[@jadencoucopoulos2567]

33:49 Go on, solve it. Solve it! SOLVE IT! _commanding voice_

[@TheRealCamster1987]

33:54

[@speedymatt1236]

🙎‍♂️

[@cinny6185]

40:57 always got me in the game because he's still reacting in the name of preserving Chell outside of the test chambers and he isn't caught in his euphoria withdrawal. The genuine fear and frustration that, yeah, could be because you're his only test subject left, but is also likely just the remnants of himself peeking out through the corruption of the chassis. I love my ball.

[@TLAO777]

Did I really just listen to over an hours worth of Wheatley quotes?

[@yaruu715]

That's daily basis for me

[@SerenaLunaStar]

ye

[@galactaofthestars9236]

Wow same.

[@moontheraisin6444]

You say that like it's weird.

[@TLAO777]

Moon Rainbow good point

[@VulpineVentures]

2:44 and whose fault you think it's going to be when a management comes down here and find 10,000 flipping vegetables?

[@withiethewither1993]

I used to think that he was saying that there were actually 10,000 vegetables in the facility somewhere and didn't know he was talking about dead humans, I just always thought there was a chamber somewhere filled with a ton of cucumbers and carrots and stuff that we never got to see

[@chloe_gospinny]

@@withiethewither1993 LMFAO

[@sock4904]

Withie The Wither HAHAHAHAHDJSHXN

[@amethyst4578]

@@withiethewither1993 that would be amazing

[@cryptid_momochi]

@@withiethewither1993 Well, to be fair.. there *are* a heck of a lot of potatoes... supposedly..

[@someoneyoumightremember6630]

“Say apple” **starts dictating the whole Communist Manifesto and then the scripts of all Shrek movies**

[@epkoda]

A spectre is haunting Europe - the spectre of communism. All the powers of old Europe have entered into a holy alliance to exorcise this spectre: Pope and Tsar, Metternich and Guizot, French Radicals and German police-spies. Where is the party in opposition that has not been decried as communistic by its opponents in power? Where is the opposition that has not hurled back the branding reproach of communism, against the more advanced opposition parties, as well as against its reactionary adversaries? Two things result from this fact: I. Communism is already acknowledged by all European powers to be itself a power. II. It is high time that Communists should openly, in the face of the whole world, publish their views, their aims, their tendencies, and meet this nursery tale of the Spectre of Communism with a manifesto of the party itself. To this end, Communists of various nationalities have assembled in London and sketched the following manifesto, to be published in the English, French, German, Italian, Flemish and Danish languages. Chapter I. Bourgeois and Proletarians(1) [German Original] The history of all hitherto existing society(2) is the history of class struggles. Freeman and slave, patrician and plebeian, lord and serf, guild-master(3) and journeyman, in a word, oppressor and oppressed, stood in constant opposition to one another, carried on an uninterrupted, now hidden, now open fight, a fight that each time ended, either in a revolutionary reconstitution of society at large, or in the common ruin of the contending classes. In the earlier epochs of history, we find almost everywhere a complicated arrangement of society into various orders, a manifold gradation of social rank. In ancient Rome we have patricians, knights, plebeians, slaves; in the Middle Ages, feudal lords, vassals, guild-masters, journeymen, apprentices, serfs; in almost all of these classes, again, subordinate gradations. The modern bourgeois society that has sprouted from the ruins of feudal society has not done away with class antagonisms. It has but established new classes, new conditions of oppression, new forms of struggle in place of the old ones. Our epoch, the epoch of the bourgeoisie, possesses, however, this distinct feature: it has simplified class antagonisms. Society as a whole is more and more splitting up into two great hostile camps, into two great classes directly facing each other - Bourgeoisie and Proletariat. From the serfs of the Middle Ages sprang the chartered burghers of the earliest towns. From these burgesses the first elements of the bourgeoisie were developed. The discovery of America, the rounding of the Cape, opened up fresh ground for the rising bourgeoisie. The East-Indian and Chinese markets, the colonisation of America, trade with the colonies, the increase in the means of exchange and in commodities generally, gave to commerce, to navigation, to industry, an impulse never before known, and thereby, to the revolutionary element in the tottering feudal society, a rapid development. The feudal system of industry, in which industrial production was monopolised by closed guilds, now no longer sufficed for the growing wants of the new markets. The manufacturing system took its place. The guild-masters were pushed on one side by the manufacturing middle class; division of labour between the different corporate guilds vanished in the face of division of labour in each single workshop. Meantime the markets kept ever growing, the demand ever rising. Even manufacturer no longer sufficed. Thereupon, steam and machinery revolutionised industrial production. The place of manufacture was taken by the giant, Modern Industry; the place of the industrial middle class by industrial millionaires, the leaders of the whole industrial armies, the modern bourgeois. Modern industry has established the world market, for which the discovery of America paved the way. This market has given an immense development to commerce, to navigation, to communication by land. This development has, in its turn, reacted on the extension of industry; and in proportion as industry, commerce, navigation, railways extended, in the same proportion the bourgeoisie developed, increased its capital, and pushed into the background every class handed down from the Middle Ages. We see, therefore, how the modern bourgeoisie is itself the product of a long course of development, of a series of revolutions in the modes of production and of exchange. Each step in the development of the bourgeoisie was accompanied by a corresponding political advance of that class. An oppressed class under the sway of the feudal nobility, an armed and self-governing association in the medieval commune(4): here independent urban republic (as in Italy and Germany); there taxable “third estate” of the monarchy (as in France); afterwards, in the period of manufacturing proper, serving either the semi-feudal or the absolute monarchy as a counterpoise against the nobility, and, in fact, cornerstone of the great monarchies in general, the bourgeoisie has at last, since the establishment of Modern Industry and of the world market, conquered for itself, in the modern representative State, exclusive political sway. The executive of the modern state is but a committee for managing the common affairs of the whole bourgeoisie. The bourgeoisie, historically, has played a most revolutionary part. The bourgeoisie, wherever it has got the upper hand, has put an end to all feudal, patriarchal, idyllic relations. It has pitilessly torn asunder the motley feudal ties that bound man to his “natural superiors”, and has left remaining no other nexus between man and man than naked self-interest, than callous “cash payment”. It has drowned the most heavenly ecstasies of religious fervour, of chivalrous enthusiasm, of philistine sentimentalism, in the icy water of egotistical calculation. It has resolved personal worth into exchange value, and in place of the numberless indefeasible chartered freedoms, has set up that single, unconscionable freedom - Free Trade. In one word, for exploitation, veiled by religious and political illusions, it has substituted naked, shameless, direct, brutal exploitation. The bourgeoisie has stripped of its halo every occupation hitherto honoured and looked up to with reverent awe. It has converted the physician, the lawyer, the priest, the poet, the man of science, into its paid wage labourers. The bourgeoisie has torn away from the family its sentimental veil, and has reduced the family relation to a mere money relation. The bourgeoisie has disclosed how it came to pass that the brutal display of vigour in the Middle Ages, which reactionaries so much admire, found its fitting complement in the most slothful indolence. It has been the first to show what man’s activity can bring about. It has accomplished wonders far surpassing Egyptian pyramids, Roman aqueducts, and Gothic cathedrals; it has conducted expeditions that put in the shade all former Exoduses of nations and crusades. The bourgeoisie cannot exist without constantly revolutionising the instruments of production, and thereby the relations of production, and with them the whole relations of society. Conservation of the old modes of production in unaltered form, was, on the contrary, the first condition of existence for all earlier industrial classes. Constant revolutionising of production, uninterrupted disturbance of all social conditions, everlasting uncertainty and agitation distinguish the bourgeois epoch from all earlier ones. All fixed, fast-frozen relations, with their train of ancient and venerable prejudices and opinions, are swept away, all new-formed ones become antiquated before they can ossify. All that is solid melts into air, all that is holy is profaned, and man is at last compelled to face with sober senses his real conditions of life, and his relations with his kind. The need of a constantly expanding market for its products chases the bourgeoisie over the entire surface of the globe. It must nestle everywhere, settle everywhere, establish connexions everywhere. The bourgeoisie has through its exploitation of the world market given a cosmopolitan character to production and consumption in every country. To the great chagrin of Reactionists, it has drawn from under the feet of industry the national ground on which it stood.

[@cringeanarchy7675]

Reddit moment

[@epkoda]

@@cringeanarchy7675 holesome 100

[@BatuhanDere]

"okay you know what? thats close enough"

[@Intelligence_Core3]

​@@epkodar/MadLads?

[@kiiego]

I never hated Wheatley. The first time I played (I was 7?) I cried because I loved him so much and still do. And at the end when he went to space I cried as well. He is my favorite character in any game I have ever played. Valve needs to get their S H I T together and bring him back. Edit: also 59:43 That “Ah!” Has me dead

[@zeltzamer4010]

Valve did do those videos about him being nominated and winning the VGA Best Character Award with him still in space - he didn't get to keep the trophy though.

[@Hawk-kc3fe]

@@zeltzamer4010 well now this a trophy in space now

[@yack8947]

SEVEN

[@zeltzamer4010]

@@yack8947 I think I may have discovered Portal even earlier. I believe I was in second grade (six years old) when I first heard of it.

[@yack8947]

@@zeltzamer4010Damn

[@araceliamezcua2014]

33:55 those of you specifically looking for Wheatley literally getting off to tests being completed. For whatever reason.

[@epkoda]

😳

[@sleepysys_9081]

..................thanks😳👉👈

[@niftyskyblue]

I mean.. won’t judge

[@yumemitai612]

Stop reading minds

[@yumemitai612]

33:54 35:08 38:10

[@bennyboiii1196]

stephen merchant for 14th doctor

[@biggiecheese253]

YES

[@oimate1958]

Yess

[@ryanmcintyre3616]

Absolutely yes!

[@raph2954]

Mm.. nah

[@theundeadpancake9869]

All I would be able to see and hear is Whealtey when he's the Doctor. Wheatley as the Doctor that's all I can see Hilarious!

[@gingergamer3270]

Legend says that to this day he is still on the floor waiting for you to pick him up

[@dolphinsnape]

legends say that?? out of my way, I'm going there right now to pick him up!!

[@lisirvine4088]

58:10 most emotional part. Oh my goodness this is just too……aaaaaaaaaAAAAA (it’s pretty long)

[@vidroll3873]

Man i love this part

[@meducrogumi]

He sounds like he's about to cry...

[@theundeadpancake9869]

@@meducrogumi In some places it sounds like he _is_ crying, if he could

[@stephaniecourteoreille5972]

this part always hurts to hear, c'mon man I just want the blue sphere to be happy :(

[@bagofmoss4710]

I JUST WANNA GO INTO SPACE AND BRING HIM BACK FOR THE WORLD

[@mackimoj]

Nobody: Wheatley: *AAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH*

[@marshmallowalien298]

He's the best character.

[@Adr3n0chr0m3]

But Glados better.

[@actuallobster1775]

@@Adr3n0chr0m3 nah

[@birdboy1092]

I KNOW RIGHT?

[@-Poka-]

@@Adr3n0chr0m3 Both....

[@vintendovs]

20:45 For some reason, this cracks me up every damn time.

[@spleens4200]

Good news!- *everything breaks* Never mind

[@sircombat3259]

LMAOO when I clicked on the link it actually was just- very funny out of context

[@exoticpotatogenesisumbrella]

1 hour of the smol bean

[@scarletbasilisk4138]

And one hour of small bean traitor. And two minutes of testing euphoria that everyone uncomfortable.

[@amethyst4578]

One hour of the borb

[@anonymouslucario285]

@@scarletbasilisk4138 you must be fun at parties

[@dollycheesecakes3658]

why do you call wheatley a smol bean

[@haley6003]

There is a bomb in your mailbox

[@OtakunoShojo]

12:47 his reaction to GLaDOS waking up is my favorite

[@guilhermefarias5255]

"Hallo!!"

[@DestructoGabe8]

You did whot!?

[@renzsena]

12:51 hello

[@Aviannauts]

just smile and wave boys

[@liamdalemon1525]

1:00:28 Calamity Ganon when he sees link walking out of the shrine of resurrection

[@whatsthevibebro9523]

Lmao

[@thunderbolt64_]

Yes

[@pokocrow]

fr

[@thepotatoportal69]

I'm now going to head canon Gannon with a Bristol accent

[@JumboWumbo101]

Wheatley Quotes: The Movie

[@Split_Soul11]

My favorite movie ✨

[@MimoriAzume]

Most of the beginning is just him repeating himself because Chell didn't do what he asked 😂

[@galactaofthestars9236]

Your not wrong

[@yoursexybeebot1798]

I mean, she was brain damaged

[@officialgershenyt]

30:41 *Wheatley speaks Spanish*

[@lisirvine4088]

“estas usando este software de traduccion de forma incorrecta. por favor, consulta el manual" which is "you are using this translation software incorrectly. please consult the manual”

[@officialgershenyt]

@@lisirvine4088 I agree

[@yack8947]

@@officialgershenyt how

[@potatomonika8796]

Also 0:19

[@birdboy1092]

Wait... in the spanish dub, does he speak English?

[@AstroTom]

I love how Wheatley gets a WHOLE HOUR of quotes, compared to GLaDOS, which makes sense because he talks too much. Not that that's a bad thing, I used this to do some artwork, and it worked well, so consider his voice good for concentration.

[@Uuan1000]

He's annoying but I can still listen to him all day and no he does not let me concentrate

[@itsshrimp91]

33:22 "Everything is gonna be just...fine." "SHUT UP!"

[@portalmaster1018]

58:39 this is kinda sad..

[@pumpkinpierose2726]

Makes me feel bad for him...

[@birdboy1092]

He sounds like he's about to cry. :(

[@portalmaster1018]

@@birdboy1092 yeah.....

[@comic12558]

Portalmaster ;-; poor wheats - he doesn’t deserve this much but at the still time he does-

[@portalmaster1018]

@@comic12558 Yeah, its not his fault he is designed to be a complete moron, its in his CODE that he cant be not a moron, which is sad.

[@sansational15]

13:57 Wheatley really should take up voice acting as my friend said.

[@sansational15]

@Paws4Glory Hey, buddy! I didn't expect you to see you here! Hello!

[@sansational15]

@Paws4Glory I'm great!

[@amethyst4578]

Oh wow, you're here lol

[@sansational15]

@@amethyst4578 Hey friendo

[@someoneyoumightremember6630]

“It’s just making me stronger, love!” WELL WOULDJA LOOK AT THAT THIS SOUNDS KINKY AS HELL!

[@teraspeXt]

Also, 33:54

[@joshualesser5568]

Every time he reacts to the testing euphoria it sounds...odd, to say the least

[@valco9507]

@@teraspeXt aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IVE HAD A IMAGE IN MY HEAD AAAAAAAA NO NO. THATS NOT GOOD AAAAA

[@birdboy1092]

I didn't need to think about that.

[@artemis8939]

@@teraspeXt NOOO WHY DID YOU HAVE TO RUIN THAT PART

[@erlgjnerigneoifnroiueabgr]

PULL ME OUT PULL ME OUT PULL ME OUT PULL ME OUT- LEAVE ME IN LEAVE ME IN LEAVE ME IN

[@ARandomSpace]

If you listen closely during Wheatley's final boss rant about Chell being manipulative, you can hear Stephen Merchant breathe. Yes. A robot. Breathing like a human.

[@julie4300]

At 38:02 the captions in-game say "[tired breathing]"

[@dolphinsnape]

maybe it's something like his ventilation system

[@annellora]

I needed this. Today our professor at university told us to listen to as much English mp3s as possible. So now I'll listen to this one all the time.

[@InfraredScale]

Best assignment ever

[@comic12558]

RedStone128 y e s

[@rustyreddo]

43:31 I dunno why but I found this way funnier than I should have

[@CinnamintBerry]

Same here XD

[@unisonbeck5872]

YAY! SOMEONE FINALLY MENTIONED THIS!!!

[@tapitapi4524]

Its funnier at 0.5x since he sounds drunk 😂

[@Sgdhsbsbdb]

I got an achievement from jumping down after he said that

[@ginniegill1026]

Lol

[@DaxAxeOffical]

the game when im alone: 12:00 the game when my parents walk in 35:09

[@tim-buck-two7681]

Steven merchant is the best

[@rebelrailz.]

Agreed. ^^

[@ShawFFA]

*Stephen

[@spotliker123]

22:45 love this bit and the next few minutes where wheatley is just speaking quietly, it's so soothing and helps me relax

[@rianasanimations9370]

Aaaawwww

[@jillreyerma7592]

Wheatley ASMR. I'd watch that to be fair.

[@rianasanimations9370]

I would wait for this dialouge before pressing the button. It just sounds amazing.

[@sindobrandnew]

Love that accent.

[@catherinemitchell8952]

Same 😂

[@carlospomares3225]

47:51 I love how genuinely frustrated he sounds.

[@jackdawing]

47:08 - 47:20 My favorite line. I quote it all the time. :')

[@birdboy1092]

Now how come I haven't been quoting that?

[@AutismSharks]

“You’re at my nothing!”

[@Dontsleep21]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAHHHHH YOU FOOL I-im in the wrong game where's the kid... I'm not looking for a ball and a girl in a jumpsuit

[@monniemai1592]

@@Dontsleep21 🙏 hat in time reference?

[@rainy_clouds]

@@Dontsleep21 i get that reference

[@ScreamingIntoThePixelVoid]

I need more of Wheatley calling Chell "love"

[@Reaperlevii]

Luv* It’s a British thing, oh also it isn’t always a nice thing

[@applejustice]

@@Reaperlevii shut up

[@Reaperlevii]

@@applejustice Lmao no

[@PLUSULTRAGIRL]

What's the timestamp?

[@Uuan1000]

Mee toooo

[@withiethewither1993]

54:00 I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure this is the only time anyone says the name Wheatley out loud, every other time it's just the word Wheatley in the subtitles or on the new Wheatley brand name

[@brennanfisher219]

31:12 “Tiny little Wheatley did this” but yeah I think those are the only two times. Still more mentions than glados and chell’s names though

[@withiethewither1993]

@@brennanfisher219 Yeah, Chell gets like, 1 mention in Portal 1, and as far as I know, GLaDOS gets her name mentioned a total of 0 times

[@Galatheam]

@@withiethewither1993 If you look aside from Caroline, (even though there are minor differences between the two). 'GLaDOS' is just an acronym of what she *is* so it isn't the same as a name (in my opinion). That's just what I assume since whenever she's mentioned in 3rd person it's just 'she' or 'her'.

[@Lunarcreeper]

@@withiethewither1993glados is written on the door trap, which is the only time i've ever seen it mentioned besides subtitles and the rings on the classic glados

[@bagofmoss4710]

58:22 I remember jumping around dodging bombs just to hear what he was saying and this whole speech right here. I died a couple of times because the room filled up with neurotoxin but I heard the whole thing. It genuinely mad me so sad for him, he sounds like he’s gonna cry (then again he’s a robot but if you listen close it still sound like he’s close to crying). I’ve played the game numerous amounts of times but after actual taking the time to hear what he says in the boss fight, sending him to space, and hearing his apology at the very end of it all, I can’t help but feel terrible for him. I know he’s just a fictional character but he will forever be my favorite in the whole portal series. I really hope that one day Valve can learn how to coins past two and make another Portal game, perhaps where we save Wheatley but I’m starting to doubt it. Anyways, I just wanted to share my story real quick, hope you all have a nice day.

[@TheBossua]

When I played that boss I decided to just stay still and not move and turns out the bombs will hurt you but not kill you. It's when you break the White gel pipe that they can kill you.

[@Youmartyrme]

I listen to his voice when I'm sad

[@birdboy1092]

Frickin genius.

[@epkoda]

same :(

[@sansational15]

Same here. His voice is so soothing and sweet.

[@Cody-wr8bt]

Same dude

[@gordier6787]

33:43 Wait a second, I thought he wasn’t able to give you any hints for the test

[@slothgotti]

nah actually i think he couldn't reveal the solution to the test, but a hint was acceptable.

[@quadkanix]

button

[@theorangeoof926]

I wonder if he would be shocked if he said what stuff you shouldn’t do.

[@mc_zackb]

I like to image that the test was so bad that the mainframe didn’t even recognize it as a test.

[@speedymatt1236]

It’s complicated how that itch works, isn’t it?

[@lisirvine4088]

“I hate portal and half life” Me: 31:45

[@steampunkastronaut7081]

33:26

[@spikyprickywatches9670]

Niv 'Mohnd 33:53

[@valoch3187]

When you try to don't be triggered

[@squeguinquack2570]

Lis Irvine You mean 1:27

[@abstrakt5336]

And TF2

[@officialgershenyt]

Favorite Quotes: 0:52 - 6:13 - 13:07 - 15:26 - 30:41 - 39:03 - 46:56 - 47:54

[@Adr3n0chr0m3]

@Øĉéåŋ Ęmpĕŕŏŗ О русский.

[@potatomonika8796]

b i r d

[@curse7469]

ARISTOTLE VS MASHY SPIKE PLATE

[@lunarskys2645]

That but he says in Spanish says (this isn't totally actuate) You are using this software incorrectly. Please consult the manual.

[@officialgershenyt]

@@lunarskys2645 yeah ik

[@Seedonator]

53:53 god damn hes talking about when you wake glados up and she just crushes wheatley a bit and chucks him away

[@Lunarcreeper]

56:41 "biggest muscle in my body, my brain, second biggest, my muscles"

[@GabrielAidley]

At 16:43 you can hear someone talking in the background? It's faint but you can hear it

[@dingle6996]

Yea. Probs the voice line givers or smth

[@bigchicken4135]

30:56: and so begins the most surprising yet sad betrayal I have ever seen

[@tostadaprincess8736]

I think I actually cried a little bit

[@poptato6426]

The fact that he sounded like a drowning seagull just adds to it

[@Reaperlevii]

@@tostadaprincess8736 Same..

[@harrypotamus4968]

1:00:28 when you swat the spider but it crawls away afterwards

[@poptato6426]

Me and roaches and centipedes

[@sircombat3259]

I swear I get a neuron activation whenever I hear this line in 27:32, I just think it’s funny to just hear him say “Hello” after going through the neurotoxin tube and just how nice he says it

[@Uuan1000]

It is so innocent I love it

[@MeowHype]

Hello! :D

[@dolphinsnape]

Me too!! Besides, is kind a cute the way itself he say "Hello"

[@nuggetinevitable4971]

I can imagine wheatley asking her to do something and she's just standing there 5:25

[@saturnstars131]

Okay listen, we should get our stories straight, if anyone asks, and no-one's going to ask, but if anyone asks, last time you checked, everyone looked pretty much alive. Not dead.

[@fennecfics]

10:52 For me, hearing Wheatley say “grip” is nearly equivalent to hearing the word “moist”-

[@Uuan1000]

Is it good?

[@fennecfics]

@@Uuan1000 bro I forgot I made this comment- I was just being weird about the way the voice actor said “grip” 😂

[@Uuan1000]

@@fennecfics wow

[@thatdenseidiot]

hello, I spent time collecting timestamps so you don't have to! let's go Screaming: 11:12 , 12:54 (this one is when GLaDOS grabs him) , 13:11 , 15:26 , 29:25 , 38:00 , 38:14 , 54:47 , 59:51 , 1:00:56 "testing euphoria": 33:53 , 34:10 , 35:08 , 38:09 , 38:31 (this last one barely counts but shhh) The bit where he talks about cards: 46:32 That one part where he says there's gonna be silence but he keeps talking: 23:04 Parts that just kinda make me sad: 58:22 , 53:38 , 54:29 There's more stuff I'd love to point out but these are the ones I decided to grab and write down

[@amethyst4578]

You're the legend this comment section needs

[@chairdog]

omg hiii 😳

[@millicentwood549]

Goodness, the testing euphoria parts are very hmm. I feel like I shouldn't be listening in.

[@Sgdhsbsbdb]

The testing euphoria scares me

[@A_lovelylittlething]

thanks for the testing euphoria bits SJSHHDSA

[@TheMythicalMatty]

silence.... 100% silence..... absolute quiet..... starting now... *WHAT ARE YOU DOING WE DONT KNOW WHAT THAT BUTTO-*

[@speedymatt1236]

Oh. The door’s open. Nice work! Let’s see what’s inside.

[@rixothewolf2884]

13:57 free *"Ey BuDdY iM sPeAkInG iN aN aCcEnT tHaT iS bEyOnD hEr RaNgE oF hEaRiNg!"*

[@hotcocoa8373]

"Exactly how painful are we talkin-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

[@dingle6996]

Whenever I have a depression episode I just listen to wheatley, stephen if you can make a small depressed kid feel better your doing something right

[@thepinecone3844]

1:00:09 My brain yelling at me whenever I play a Belmont in Smash

[@rebelrailz.]

Oh man. xP I love your profile picture, by the way.. I remember that little character.

[@thepinecone3844]

@@rebelrailz. Aw geez, I'm late to seeing this reply. :,) But thanks, m'dude! ^^

[@poptato6426]

Me when teaching my cousin to play smash

[@BloomBlanche]

My friends whenever I decide to play Ness in Smash

[@travelingmerchant6434]

Heaven is just Wheatley telling melodramatic stories while shifting in and out of hearing range and screaming for you to pick him up

[@NICKatronMC]

46:29-47:55 Came to this video for this absolute gem

[@MiDuWay]

Wheatley's conspiracy theory at 58:45 - 59:36 is so fuckin WILD and I love it

[@person3271]

It's just cleverly placed lights and papier mache, that's all it is!

[@bejigante53]

32:28 I would've loved to hear what those robots laughing sounded like

[@reformedorthodoxmunmanquara]

1:26 minor case of series brain damage

[@speedymatt1236]

Serious, not series.

[@TDFAL]

And who's fault is it gona be when management comes don't here and finds 10000 flipin vegetables

[@comic12558]

Chell mind: not me-

[@Max-fl1mb]

I love Wheatley and GLaDOS so much ah they are both so great and adorable *high pitch screech*

[@localroboplaguedoc]

Same *screeches at same pitch in response*

[@64hoshi]

Agreed *screeches in the exact same thing*

[@arreza3080]

5:07 I remember this made me laugh much louder than it should've

[@bellabeeuwu]

i feel like i match his personality so much, besides the whole, hes the main bad guy part

[@why.are.you.here.]

Same

[@sansational15]

Same here. He's my spiritual brother.

[@birdboy1092]

I've got a fricken plush of Wheatley. I am what you would call an *enthusiastic* *fan*

[@AmiAikki]

What where did you get that

[@toyouke3708]

@@AmiAikki I saw one on Amazon but its unavailable for now unfortunately

[@solarflarethepegasus3013]

58:10 omg Wheatley (Also when he reveals he has tried this before😨)

[@speedymatt1236]

I think he’s lost it…

[@hellohi-xy4mt]

Chapters 1 3 4 5 8 9 and 10 are: 00:00 Courtesy Call 13:00 Return 13:29 Surprise 15:08 Escape 32:07 Itch 42:16 Part Where He Kills You And Last but not least, 1:01:16 Credits.

[@Alperson18]

I really think any plot synopsis of the game should say "Two little robots make you cry" and that's it

[@thischannelisdead5535]

15:26 Wheatley: GAH!!

[@cloakenjoyer]

1:00:51 "OH, BRILLIANT YEAH TAKE ONE MORE LOOK AT YOUR PRECIOUS HUMAN MOON, CUZ IT CAN`T HELP YOU NOW" most epic dialogue in story of videogames

[@littlebigdragon313]

Ironic words spoken moments before disaster

[@lemonade-luvr]

pro tip he sounds drunk on 0.5 speed

[@PressedRoses]

XD he does

[@arrivedknight7632]

Lol

[@ItsRemix77]

dude this is great😂😂

[@kingofproxies8025]

😂😂😂

[@rebecca.chambers]

Oh my gosh yes xd