Pregnancy Vlog: Being Honest about Debt, Feeling Disconnected and Making Biscuits

[@allyyy93]

I can totally relate with you re: debt. Feels so good to know other people my age are in the same boat. Would love if you spoke more about your journey, as I could use all the encouragement I can get haha xx

[@MaryForester]

I definitely will do, Thankyou! X

[@girlwiththearabstrap]

Totally appreciate the money and debt chat. I think you're right, there's so many people that could echo your story! We should discuss it more xx

[@MaryForester]

Definitely! There’s so much better shame around it and so important to be able to talk openly about it Xx

[@badbodydouble]

Every day just blends into one at the minute but I always look forward to Sunday in anticipation of a new vlog! Can’t wait to watch with a brew later x

[@MaryForester]

Thankyou so much! Xx

[@BETH78900X]

A friend of mine had her baby last month and she said she felt like she was giving birth on set of a film. That's how she described it. She said it felt cold and surreal. Sounds like you're feeling the same at your appointments. So sorry for you, I hope by the time you're ready to give birth the country is in a better place. ❤️

[@MaryForester]

That’s exactly it! Oh I do feel for her, it’s such an odd time and yes fingers crossed for more normality soon! Xx

[@djmande1]

During this time I’ve definitely felt the most for the women I see around that are pregnant. I can’t even begin to imagine how all the hormones, coupled with what is going on in the world, makes you feel. Sending you lots of love and strength honey. xx

[@MaryForester]

Thankyou so much Xx

[@loveloveChaiTea]

So sad to see you upset. I know how you feel Mary, I’m current 22 weeks with my first pregnancy and the appointments are stressing me out - I really feel for them as it’s such difficult times and they must be under so much pressure, but I can’t help but constantly feel like I’m ‘slipping through the net’ with the care I’m being given. All the usual checks aren’t being undertaken as my appointments are switched last minute to rushed phone call appointments. Haven’t met my midwife, but looking forward to seeing someone in person at last. Thank you for your videos about being pregnant during this time, they really have been comforting through this.

[@MaryForester]

Really hope it starts to get better soon and Thankyou for the support! X

[@LL-qs8xt]

I just love your honesty and realness Mary, it's so horrible to see you upset, sending you a big virtual hug ❤️

[@lornamcmahon6099]

Finally a youtuber that talks the reality of finance. I'm not saying you can't be private about you're earnings but when i watch beauty youtubers spending money on hauls or shopping and don't acknowledge that most people cant afford to do that, and are just trying to break even every month it makes you feel like such a failure! if you feel comfortable with it id love to hear more about how you're getting on in that sense.

[@therebex23]

Honestly, you can probably tell by the KZbin channel whether or not they are living in a budget that is similar to yours. Especially with "beauty" KZbinrs, a lot of their stuff is sent to them in PR (especially high view/high subscriber channels) but those channels only do "sponsored financial" videos unless they are clear that they are talking about "before they made money" or if they work another job in addition to uploading videos. Feeling like a failure because you aren't spending more than even just $20 per month on beauty products shouldn't be a thing...you don't need to buy the latest products if you still have what you need to get by day-to-day. Just make a list of things you want to try out when your version of that product runs out.

[@Nubianette]

I have a friend who’s pregnant for the 1st time. They eliminated most of her appointments. It’s also hard not sharing this with her family, in person. I’m not an emotional person, but I think it would be so hard! This isn’t how it’s supposed to be! Nothing is normal for most people. We’re in California, and still have the stay at home order. I just hold on to this only being temporary.

[@LifeWithFlowers]

I adore dresses with pockets. It makes me blissfully happy.🌿

[@therebex23]

I'm not a mom, I'm not pregnant and I never have been but I do know people that are pregnant or have given birth during this COVID time and my heart does go out. Being unable to do do it "the normal way" by celebrating and just generally being in close proximity to loved ones through it all has to be absolutely crushing especially when it comes to how you "pictured it to be." Everything is overly sterile and institutionalized. I also know some moms who were in high-risk pregnancies (including my own mom with my brother) who had to basically live in quarantine during their pregnancy/after the birth of the child while the world was normal outside of it all. It's so hard. It feels unfair because it is but, from what everyone has said about the experience to me, it is just a moment of the child's whole life and your whole life as a mother. The memories made after birth are the ones that are held closest and the struggles are the backstory.

[@pinkabuki]

It would be so scary to be pregnant during these times, it's already a daunting and scary time without a pandemic going on. Stay strong, it'll be over soon.

[@MaryForester]

Yes very keen for this to be done with-Thankyou Xx

[@princesscharlott1983]

I get how you feel fully too, at 20 weeks. I Feel grateful that I had another pregnancy in normal times. It was so different, so liberating, freeing and made me feel quite feminine. And you’re right, it takes away from how you feel about the whole experience, as it is now. You feel hidden away, fat, alone, and again with hospital and gp appts, almost just like a number now.. I get you. And try to discuss it with hubby, still feel alone x there are many of us x

[@MaryForester]

Thankyou so much Xx

[@staceypage2733]

Hi, sorry if someone has already suggested this or you have it already but the Kicks Count app (pic is of purple baby feet) is great at putting your mind at ease. I found that the later I got on my pregnancy, I’d sometimes think did I feel him kick enough because you kinda get use to it after a while and becomes part of normal daily life if that makes sense, especially when they get into a pattern of what time they kick/move and how often. It’s the app they advertise in hospital waiting rooms but I’m not sure in the circumstances if people are waiting around or just going straight in and out for appointments. Take care x

[@mysticmel808]

Loved the debt chat, thanks for your openness xx

[@imanjoseph612]

I've had two friends whose daughters have had their babies during this time. Only the dads were allowed in the delivery room and so far the families can see the children however they can not touch them or dote on them. I sympathize with all of you moms who are pregnant during this time and are getting close to your due date. Be safe!

[@reetalahti1913]

I'm so glad you're talking about financial struggles, there's way too much shame attached to the whole topic around being in debt (or not being good with money in general…) and just living paycheck to paycheck - so there should be a lot more transparent discussions to realize that it is nothing to be ashamed of, and it's very common situation for many young adults who've had to study and work hard for their living from early on. Also, I've been following you since the beginning of your channel and lately I have gotten very sick of the whole direction of 'influencer culture' and the kind of illusionary lifestyle it promotes in the end and can be so damaging :( I don't watch almost any other vloggers than you anymore cause I feel like you are one of the VERY few who've managed to keep it real and truly genuine!! I love listening to your chats on any topic, you have effortlessly chic style and skincare and home decor is always a plus;) I'd be curious to hear your thoughts on fast fashion? I've lately been getting more into the topic and started avoiding zara and h&m as much as possible just focusing on buying LESS but good quality and longevity in mind always, supporting local and luckily there's also more and more great ways of making secondhand findings accessible as well. Love you Mary! X

[@DeborahSutherlandDebinPei]

I'm sorry you are feeling this way, and certainly are entitled to as well. This is such a special time for you, and we sometimes forget others expectations may suffer. 😷❤🇨🇦

[@vivianjohnson-jones5449]

Yeah I'm feeling really overwhelmed with finances right now

[@carolyncross9950]

You articulated beautifully everything I'm feeling just now. I'm really struggling with the whole mask palaver for the simple reason that I'm very very hard of hearing - I've got maybe less than 25% of my hearing left - and so I rely really heavily on lipreading, which of course is impossible when everyone's wearing masks. Asking someone to repeat themselves over and over again is so stressful; at least if you wear glasses, there's a clue right there that your eyesight might not be the greatest. Not so with hearing loss. Admitting that you find it really difficult too made me feel so much better - thank you 😊

[@opodobed]

With my second son I went to the doctor's after 30 weeks. I wouldn't be so bold with the first one, but I definitely missed nothing.

[@NatashaDarmandrail]

Thank you for being so realistic 🧡 I love the calmness of your videos and your style

[@lyndseynorman9366]

I wish I hadn't seen this.... :( I vowed to stop spending money unnecessarily and now I want to buy everything on the Olive website. On a serious note, I'm sorry your pregnancy isn't what you thought it would be - life can feel so unfair. You're allowed to mourn that experience and cry and be angry, but then be at peace with it all. You're growing a new life and that's really something isn't?? It's just magic. It's your pregnancy and that makes it unique and special in itself. You're being given the opportunity to just BE and connect to yourself and your baby during this time - a gift from this awful situation I think. Remember those small moments with Hainsley and the moments you'll share with your baby when the time comes. Those are the things that really matter. Sending you so much love in the times you're feeling down about it all XXX

[@MaryForester]

Ooooh I’m so sorry, it’s just such lovely stuff isn’t it! Thankyou so so much lots of love Xx

[@WellWithHels]

I saw Tanya Burr has an amazing garden mirror 😍 might be an idea for your balcony! Xx

[@MaryForester]

Such a good idea Helen-Thankyou! Xx

[@WellWithHels]

@@MaryForester Selfie goals! xxx

[@ashleyjoy9275]

I went in for my 28 week, a week ago... It was supposed to be an extended educational visit to discuss my birth plan, and go over everything that will be happening with the baby after it is born (vaccines, where in the hospital we will stay, what to bring) so we were informed that my partner was to attend this appointment. I also needed him there because I had to take the 3 hour glucose test again and it always makes me woozy and I can't drive afterwords. We got to the front desk and just that day they had adjusted their policies and no visitors were allowed to be there anymore. I had no idea that change was made, and the lady at the front desk yelled at me "WHO GAVE HIM PERMISSION TO BE HERE!?". Being so damn hormonal I totally lost it and started crying, which then made the pregnant lady behind me in line start crying for me. It was a shit show. The way you described the appointment was so accurate. My midwife didn't even feel human to me anymore. I dread my appointments now, and I used to look forward to them.

[@MaryForester]

That is horrible-Hoping for a better situation soon Lots of love Xx

[@missphillyc]

Hi Mary, please make sure you press the wire part of your mask down, till it fits on top of your nose bridge, and pull the mask a bit, making it cover your chin. Just wanna make sure you're properly protected. Totally understand how bad wearing a mask can make people feel, but surely you'll get used to it. Love you lots, stay safe xxoo

[@MaryForester]

Will do Thankyou! Xx

[@NuraM444]

i'm so sorry you're feeling sad about your baby appointments! i know it's so hard and i can't imagine the way you feel but this will all pass over soon and it will be a distant memory, and you wil be holding a beautiful baby! also, what you said about london is the reason i really don't want to move there but i love the idea of london, if only i was rich! xx

[@nansjenansje8907]

You are doing great and if you feel low now and then thats oke, you must not be too harsh on yourself!

[@hannahsallabank1936]

I wonder whether it's the stage of lockdown we are at or the stage of pregnancy or a bit of a mix of both, as I feel the same as you do this week. I felt completely disheartened and disconnected following my 24 week midwife check this week, it's very difficult to articulate but from what you have said, I feel very similar. I've struggled with feeling guilty in feeling this way, as I know I am very lucky to be healthy and pregnant with so many others in much worse situations than me. But I'm trying to let myself feel what I feel! This isn't the pregnancy any of us imagined and everything feels uncertain and disconnected, the perfect word to describe it. What a lot of waffle I've just written but basically sending lots of hugs, you are not alone and are doing the best you can 🙂 xx

[@MaryForester]

It’s so nice to be able to have support like this though and know that we’re all feeling the same, hoping for better times soon and lots of love Xx

[@katiesmith3954]

💛😔 hated seeing you get upset , but thanks for sharing your real feelings. Hope you're feeling better 💛💛💛

[@JJO54]

I have spent the last three months mask fit testing our hospital staff and I feel for them so much they have to wear fitted masks for 12 hr shifts, they have sores on their faces, they struggle to communicate in them and they get so hot but can’t drink for hours and they also talk about the impact the masks have on the patients and it feeling inpersonal. It must be hard being pregnant at this time when you should be able to enjoy it 😥

[@itschilly6232]

Aw my friend😔This should be a happy time for you. Sending lots of hugs 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

[@liv5529]

Mary, you are glowing!!!!!

[@teneshaanderson4761]

Totally agree with you about the debt situation

[@MaryForester]

Xx

[@selamawit2144]

Am I gonna have to wait till next week to see your next vlog??!! 🙈 I really love you!!! I really get excited when I see your vlogs !!

[@miafrancis9539]

I really dont understand this whole GP thing with them not seeing any patients when doctors in hospitals are carrying on as normal, a doctor is a doctor in my opinion, I think you've highlighted a very real situation which is affecting pregnant women at the moment, try not to worry to much about feeling a disconection to your pregnancy I can assure you the moment you hold that baby it will will all dissapear, look after yourself.

[@MaryForester]

Thankyou! Xx

[@rosieposy8]

Gps are seeing patients but they are trying to see as many people as possible over theohone or by video. This stops gps passing infections to patients and getting them themselves. My surgery is seeing those patients who after a phone or video call need to be seen in clinic with them wearing a mask/ apron/ gloves. In Italy lots of doctors died and passed on covid to others. Gps are trying to keep their patients and themselves safe.

[@Junealt]

I hope one of these AF wine companies sees your reviews and send your more to try. I'm very tempted to go and get some of them now just to see what they are like, maybe i'll forgo alcohol wine for good!.. maybe

[@trevilley]

Hi Mary I have said it before you are one of the authentic you tubers about. I like how you are plain talking and your discussion about money for so many is timely. I cannot abide someYtubers who have shopping hauls eg at primark yet they seem to be earning 10k plus a month. Really, I’m not knocking primark but if someone presents like that would they buy from there.. plus anything you buy to wear etc you buy coz you want it and we see you wear it. I bought the stripey lounge trousers - not sure if I should wear em out! In the future perhaps you could colour my long hair?? Anyways can I wish you, Ainsley and your baby all the best. Thanks for the good vibes in these times x

[@yndianna]

What you said about being in & out (more in than out for me) of your overdraft since your 20s is so relatable, especially when you're in an industry where jobs can often be/are "seasonal", temporary or there's just not that much offers for the amount of job seekers. Though struggling can be beneficial to learning things finance/budgeting class should be mandatory and free for all in school, especially as you're about to enter uni/"adult life"

[@MISSLEONAJB]

Hey sweets, lovely to see another vlog. Love that dress - I’m loving that you’re managing to keep your style whilst being pregnant - not that there’s anything wrong with wearing anything you wanted tbh. Sorry you’re having your pregnancy journey during this crazy time, it must be tough - you can get through it ♥️ I hope you have a good week and good luck planning for Hainsley’s Birthday 🥰 xxx

[@georgiarogers79]

Loving these regular vlogs 👌

[@MaryForester]

I’m loving doing them! Xx

[@thischarminglife5393]

You're entitled to feel upset about the state of affairs during your pregnancy! try to think of it as a small 9mo. bump in time compared to the rest of your life with your baby 💕 sending lots of love!

[@MaryForester]

Thankyou! Xx

[@sweetygirl165]

I think we will have to get used to wearing masks inside for quite a long time to come. at this point, going into a supermarket or into public transport without one is just not cool, we have to make sure to protect those around us. in most other European countries they are mandatory, and for good reason. I'd recommend finding a nice fabric one, those are more comfy. :)

[@Stronggrl]

"I thought Id never have to wear a face mask....I find them so claustrophobic"; totally me💯💯

[@andreapoulieva6717]

Well, I think you are doing a great job, Mary ❤ I had my daughter 2 years ago and couldn't imagine what it is like to be pregnant right now. My boyfriend and I wanted to start trying for a second baby, but we postponed it, for now 😶 Sending love to you both 💋

[@MaryForester]

Thankyou so much! Xx

[@alexandrawelch935]

I was in the same position as you with uni debt from studying in London. 6 years after graduating uni I was fully debt free then I got married and took out more credit to pay for it. I am using Dave Ramsey’s debt free plan he has a KZbin channel and Cullen and Katie on KZbin are using him too to get out of 100,000 of debt. Hopefully it helps like it has helped me!

[@KellyR456]

Respect. Respect. Respect. Respect. Respect. ❣️

[@selamawit2144]

How come people have 24 weeks check up mine was at 28 so that’s my first meeting with midwife !!

[@MaryForester]

Maybe it varies by location? I did feel like no1 really cared if I booked this appointment or not so perhaps it’s not that necessary X

[@kathy199523]

I've been using Plum since end of Feb and I would highly recommend for anyone who wants to get into investing or who just wants to start saving

[@MaryForester]

It’s such a good app, so glad to hear someone else loves it too Xx

[@ozlemschannel8586]

Hi...I'm from Turkey...My english is little...I don't understand what you say...but I saw you use aluminum foil...Aluminum foil is heavy metal for you and your baby...don't use...I wish you to give birth to your baby with health...don't worry whatever you are upset...the important thing is you and your baby...kiss you...😘🙏🍀 (I wrote using translation...I hope it's true)

[@007VCP]

❤️

💛💜💛💜

[@MaryForester]

🤍🤍🤍

[@emmalouise1939]

I'd love to be your friend and even more so id love to give you a hug (god I sound like a nutter don't I) 😆 it must be such a strange time to be pregnant. I hope you've managed to see family now the rules have relaxed a little. Also, i don't think living in London goes with being debt free 😔 I was watching this morning the other day and a girl on there mentioned how she took to living on a houseboat as a form of lower cost living due to not having to pay fees unless you moor somewhere for more than 2 weeks ... The idea is great but the reality i bet isnt such a great way of living . Have a good week xx

[@BradyViolation]

Are you still doing lip injections while pregnant?

[@teah80]

Has somebody not told you? You should not be drinking alcohol while pregnant. I had your video playing in the background while I was cooking. Sorry if this comes across as rude and I had to replay the part of the video where you give a wine review.

[@MaryForester]

If you’d have been paying attention you would’ve seen it was non alcoholic wine, I’d advise always double checking what you’re reacting to

[@teah80]

@@MaryForester Whoo, that's a relief! I'm so grateful and sorry.

[@webvinita]

Poor you that you can't hear doctors or midwives with PPEs while they are trying to look after you while protecting you and themselves. Must be tough

[@MaryForester]

We’re allowed to be upset by the situation however it affects us individually, it doesn’t mean we lack perspective it just means we’re human