Premarital Sex? Not for This 1950s Chicago Girl. She Told Me Why in 1989

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David Hoffman

David Hoffman

2 жыл бұрын

I interviewed almost 200 American adults for my 1990 television series looking back at the 1960s and 1950s. Each person told their story in 1989 when this was recorded. I purposely selected mostly ordinary folk to be in my series rather than famous people. This woman very articulately stated her experience as a Catholic girl growing up in Chicago Illinois in the 1950s in a traditional family living a traditional life. Get married. Be a mom. Maybe be a secretary as she says. But as the 60s came on, she felt she wanted more. She wasn't being pushed as she said. It was her own desire to do more with her own life while continuing to love motherhood. I have interviewed many women from this period of time challenged by motherhood and the workplace as two "responsibilities" that they felt they could not do with equal passion and give each the amount of time needed.
Premarital sex in the 1960s was a controversial topic and considered taboo by many in Western societies. Attitudes towards sexuality and sexual behavior were undergoing significant changes during the time period, particularly among young people, who were becoming more liberal and open-minded. However, the conservative attitudes of older generations and religious institutions often continued to view premarital sex as immoral and sinful.
The sexual revolution of the 1960s and 1970s challenged traditional norms and values, leading to greater sexual freedom and a shift in attitudes towards premarital sex. The availability of effective birth control options, such as the birth control pill, also played a role in increasing acceptance of premarital sex.
Despite the changing attitudes, premarital sex was still stigmatized and many people felt pressured to conform to traditional moral standards. As a result, discussions about premarital sex were often kept private and not discussed openly in public.
Overall, the 1960s was a time of change and evolution in attitudes towards sexuality and premarital sex, as young people sought to challenge traditional norms and establish a more open and liberal society.
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David Hoffman filmmaker

Пікірлер: 348
@Mister006
@Mister006 2 жыл бұрын
Kudos to the filmmakers that are documenting the everyday realities of today, as David Hoffman did in the 1990s! Thank you David, for your service to American culture!
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your appreciation of the work that I am and have been doing. David Hoffman filmmaker
@trainer1158
@trainer1158 2 жыл бұрын
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker Have you had anyone you've interviewed from back then find their video on your channel and comment? I'd love to know what they think of their reflections from 30 years ago and if they look at things differently now.
@tamarrajames3590
@tamarrajames3590 2 жыл бұрын
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker I love that you are still interviewing interesting people for us to this day. Your legacy will be unique, and important in generations to come. As each person ages and passes on, the world loses a little more wisdom and experience, much of it from people who have never thought their stories were important, and could educate others coming behind us.🖤🇨🇦
@michaelbradshaw8278
@michaelbradshaw8278 2 жыл бұрын
This lovely lady could've been my Mom, if only she had a German accent. The resemblance is striking. A very thought provoking film, yet again. Thank you, David Hoffman, Filmmaker!! Bravo!
@bm.3759
@bm.3759 2 жыл бұрын
she is so great. i can just feel the warm energy of hers through the screen. she smiles with every sentence. she definitely was a great mother, you can tell.
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
It was a pleasure to interview her.
@benjaminmacrae3390
@benjaminmacrae3390 2 жыл бұрын
One of the things that caught my attention was how she described her parents marriage as compared to her own. It's super interesting how these things change with time; it's easy to fall into the temptation of seeing all previous generations as conservative, especially in the day and age we live in.
@minorshan
@minorshan 2 жыл бұрын
I suspect because her parents were maintaining a way of life that was slowly being culturally was being rewritten. Pre-Industrial revolution tasks were equally distributed in equal roles, with everyone pitching in and tasks weren't denigrated for being "women's work" in the sense of being less valuable. It was all considered valuable. Roll to the 1880s, aside from upper middle class, most women had to work and generally, women handled the household finances. Post WW1 it seems to have shifted to moving to what we consider "traditional" roles and any work done in the home wasn't real, it's expected and not valued except on a condescending level. I suspect, because of men coming back from the war and feeling enchroached upon by women proving they can do the work. Same backlash post WW2. The first half of the 20th century was a really short blip on the radar. Still, good on her parents for having a respectful relationship.
@benjaminmacrae3390
@benjaminmacrae3390 2 жыл бұрын
@@minorshan I couldn't have said that better myself. I agree wholeheartedly with your interpretation.
@LifeMostSouthern
@LifeMostSouthern 2 жыл бұрын
I love how honest she is about her feelings. I think a lot of her feelings mirror mine as I watch the world today. All these different sides and I don’t totally agree with any of them because so of how extreme people are getting and I just want to scream “Stop watching the news and reading the internet and THINK! Just think for yourself.” I honestly try to stay away from news but sometimes it finds it’s way into my little world and then I have to go looking for the source that spins the least one way or the other to see what has actually happened. And like her I just don’t know what to think. What I do see is too many extremes. Extreme comments, actions and ideas. That is for all sides, I just think it’s all too extreme and it’s going to get very bad if everyone doesn’t calm down. Unfortunately, I’ve studied history and know a bit about human nature and the likelihood of them calming down to think is slim. Thanks again for a very thought provoking video and for preserving oral history for generations to come.
@elenabob4953
@elenabob4953 2 жыл бұрын
Ohh, remember the times when parents shared responsabilites and one salary was more than enough to keep a household?
@chickenflavor9880
@chickenflavor9880 2 жыл бұрын
1 salary is enough it just has to be more than 30k.
@elenabob4953
@elenabob4953 2 жыл бұрын
Before workforce was values because men worked and women did the house chores. When women entered the workforce that have gained their financial independence but they also double tho workforce with an impact on the paychecks. 30k after tax in the USA when you have children isn't enough, at least in Washington.
@misters2837
@misters2837 2 жыл бұрын
@@elenabob4953 We have "Rosie The Riviter" to thank for much of that....
@robertl.fallin7062
@robertl.fallin7062 2 жыл бұрын
@@elenabob4953 The contraceptive pill was controversial on its introduction in the early fiftys then gained acceptance in the sixtys as a safe birth control method. It had a great impact on women, their opportunities for education and a greatly different life than their mothers.
@pshkdjdbd3950
@pshkdjdbd3950 2 жыл бұрын
@@misters2837 no, we have had lots of inflation and a large rise in the cost of living expenses since the 1960's and a consistently wealthy out of touch and apathetic congress that refuses to raise the federal minimum wage. It's still $7.25 per hour in the state I live in while rent is often 400 or 500 dollars a month. plus heating, electric, water and food. Divide and conquer is the oldest elite strategy in the books. Don't scapegoat women for fighting and getting equal workplace rights. That won't get you or anybody else anywhere better politically or economically.
@ryanharris6045
@ryanharris6045 2 жыл бұрын
She is just great! This is like having a conversation with my mom. I really miss her.❤
@tundrawomansays5067
@tundrawomansays5067 2 жыл бұрын
Sounds like your mom was wonderful! I’m sure you do miss her very much. How I would loved to have had a mother like your’s.
@ryanharris6045
@ryanharris6045 2 жыл бұрын
@@tundrawomansays5067 Thanks, she could really converse on quite a few subjects. The lady on the video really thought deeply about life and morality. It was a great interview. I am glad we can see these films.
@batman5224
@batman5224 2 жыл бұрын
To me, the late sixties went from one extreme end to the other. The fifties, by and large, attempted to suppress the very notion of sexual urges or feelings even being a tangible part of reality. It was the idea that all sexual thoughts are wrong, that even discussing sexual matters is clandestine, but in the late sixties, a new notion arouse, one which declared that all sensual desires must be acted upon, that there is nothing sacred about intimacy, and that lechery is a virtue. This partly came from the fact that the cultural values of the fifties weren’t grounded in anything spiritual or transcendent. People behaved in certain ways because of conformity, therefore making it more convenient to conform to a new set of values.
@pshkdjdbd3950
@pshkdjdbd3950 2 жыл бұрын
Sorry if this is a stupid question, but about the idea that in the 60's the culture changed and people thought that sexual urges must be acted on. Can you give examples of that? I was under the impression that in the 60's feminists and other women and men started to question and defy cultural norms about consent and sex and sexual harassment and sexism in general. I think the idea that sex should always be acted in is more of a 90's and 21st century thing because of commercialism. Sex sells and gets attention for obvious reasons. I feel like the "if it feels good, do it" thing is a result of the unhealthy repression and sometimes forced or coerced marriages of the 50's. Basically every married lesbian in the 50's was unfortunately married to a man not because of love or attraction, obviously, but to be suplorted financially and possibly also socially. That's what I mean about coercion.
@batman5224
@batman5224 2 жыл бұрын
@@pshkdjdbd3950Statistically, there was a huge uptick in premarital sex in the 70s and 80s. The pop culture, at least in terms of film and television, also started to push a more libertine narrative. Of course, cultural transformation is never universal. In more rural areas, such changes didn’t start to take place until the 80s/90s.
@pshkdjdbd3950
@pshkdjdbd3950 2 жыл бұрын
@@batman5224 ok yeah. I agree that tv and media played a role in changing the culture. Its true about how rural areas changed much slowly, and yeah there was more sex before marriage after the 60's but that doesn't mean people had sex because they thought they should always act on impulses and the new norm of hedonism. What I'm asking is what kind of evidence suggests that the 60's caused a new extreme of hypersexuality because of the new social norm? I think the extreme hypersexuality is a relatively new social norm that started around 2011 or so when touch screen phones and tinder were widely used and big tech messed up our lives and made us mere animals.
@batman5224
@batman5224 2 жыл бұрын
@@pshkdjdbd3950 It depends on what you mean by sexuality. The notion that sex is a recreational activity that can be separated from covenant relationships certainly took root in the sixties. However, with each generation, promiscuity has steadily increased. What we see today is the logical conclusion of the sixties.
@tundrawomansays5067
@tundrawomansays5067 2 жыл бұрын
@@batman5224 From the beginning of the ‘60’s until about mid ‘60’s things remained pretty much rooted in the 50’s: Women couldn’t get a credit card without her husband signing for it, a woman’s place was in the home etc. and then....*THE PILL ARRIVED!* That had a profound effect on women and society in general. An unmarried pregnant woman/girl was truly a social outcast while the male sperm doner suffered exactly zero consequences. However, as a friend of mine observed who graduated high school in 1964, got married a week after graduation and had two kids by age 20, “Right in the middle of the ‘60’s they changed the rules!” She and many other women in this cohort got whipsawed from the middle of the ‘60’s to the end of decade. They did everything by the socially acceptable script. And then the script was flipped. BTW, this “promiscuity” you allege has steadily increased? What do you mean? Males have always had at least tacit if not overt permission to have as much sex with as many different partners as they could. And they did. No social stigma associated with males procreating and then denying paternity and walking away. Interestingly, to this day we mandate all kinds of testing on newborns *except for paternity testing.* Hmm...wonder why. No doubt more than a few males unknowingly are raising biological offspring they did not father. Women want equality so let’s mandate DNA testing.
@arthurw8054
@arthurw8054 2 жыл бұрын
Fascinating. It's like time traveling twice, to 1989 and this eloquent 49-year-old woman's retrospection from her vantage point then, and then again to the 1950s-60s she's remembering. I can't help but wonder if she's still with us, and if so how - at age 81 or 82, - she sees the world we inhabit today. Thank you.
@wenmoonson
@wenmoonson 2 жыл бұрын
"oh, I've seen this one! This is a rerun..."
@bethanne558cooke7
@bethanne558cooke7 2 жыл бұрын
Very interesting Interview! Sidenote: this young lady is now 82 years old! :-)
@moniquemosley2122
@moniquemosley2122 2 жыл бұрын
Really??? Wowza.
@livingbeings
@livingbeings 2 жыл бұрын
I have so much respect for this woman
@mariaq8087
@mariaq8087 2 жыл бұрын
I grew up as a teen in the 80"s, strict Afrikaans South African mom, strict Greek orthodox dad, wasn't allowed out, didn't experience what regular kids my age were doing. Got married at 21 to the first man who told me he loved me. My mom never mentioned the "birds and bees" to me, so I didn't know I'd get pregnant the first time... Lol i can only laugh about it now. Funny thing is my brothers were allowed so much more freedom.
@henriklarssen1331
@henriklarssen1331 2 жыл бұрын
Sounds the same when it comes to Muslims, the Sons are always allowed to do what they want, the Daughters not so much.
@mariaq8087
@mariaq8087 2 жыл бұрын
@@henriklarssen1331 my first husband was a Pakistani Muslim, so when he took me to Pakistan in the early 90"s to meet his family, I guess he told them he'd met a good girl as they treated me with so much love and respect. Even to this day, were divorced but have 2 daughters, I'm still in contact with the family on a regular basis.
@pshkdjdbd3950
@pshkdjdbd3950 2 жыл бұрын
Holy shit! I'm so sorry you had to deal with a pregnancy without informed consent. That must have been awful! I can't imagine how that would make a person feel. Parents who don't teach their children about sex and reproduction are cowardly. Smh. I knew about sex ever since I was 8 or 9 because I saw saw a pregnant woman and asked my mom about her belly later that day.
@sicNtwstdF
@sicNtwstdF 2 жыл бұрын
I was done the same way.
@pshkdjdbd3950
@pshkdjdbd3950 2 жыл бұрын
Not sure how im making a woke argument. Kids ask questions about pregnancy at different ages and parents should wait until the kid seems ready to understand. Are you against forced male circumcision? I 100% am. No mans intimate body parts should be removed like that for such a pointless, petty, mean, and overly entitled reason. It does harm and not any good. It's also often humiliating. Science has showed people this knowledge against circumcision. Both men and women gaining knowledge of truth to make decsions for their own body choices is powerful and important to freedoms. Everyone should have the choice to make decisions about their own body if it doesn't harm others. How is it woke to understand scientific proven knowledge of how pregnancy happens and the risks and then for a woman to make the choice of what substance goes into her body, or not? not sure how getting the chance to understand a process and make a decision about pregnancy before it happends is woke.
@FallNorth
@FallNorth 2 жыл бұрын
I want to say: raising a family is not a BAD thing. Quite the opposite. The amount of work to do it properly is incredible! The problem here is not that intelligent women raise children or are wives, it's that women are not RESPECTED enough for doing something that is great.
@aguyontheinternet8436
@aguyontheinternet8436 2 жыл бұрын
or maybe that they weren't allowed to do anything else. . . :/
@magical5181
@magical5181 Жыл бұрын
Its looked down upon by women nowadays to raise a family which is stupid, one of the points of life is raising a family.
@magical5181
@magical5181 Жыл бұрын
@@aguyontheinternet8436 maybe they were. What if they did anything else, thought about that? How would the children end up, how would the man eat after a long day at work? Women being housewives was simply the norm back then. It wasn’t like they were literally forced to stay at home, there just weren’t many other options.
@testacals
@testacals 5 ай бұрын
@@magical5181 "How would the children end up ?" Normal. "how would the man eat after a long day at work?" This is such an stupid question on so many levels. 90% of the working class families only cook one time during the early morning. Also men live single while working all the time.
@magical5181
@magical5181 5 ай бұрын
@@testacals oh the children of today are so normal, definitely not mental problems. LGBTQ is definitely not on the rise, and other cancerous ideologies like the just stop oil protestors.
@EstebanDeSade
@EstebanDeSade 2 жыл бұрын
She is so eloquent explaining exactly how things were at that time, very interesting to listen to. And she says what I've always thought too, that the Manson family terror was the straw that broke the camel's back for the 60s counterculture movement.
@cynthiatolman326
@cynthiatolman326 2 жыл бұрын
My mother had this mindset and I wanted to go to college so bad, but she said they couldn't afford it and my stepdad made too much money for financial aid and I believed her. I felt like my life was a dead end. Marriage wasn't what I really wanted, but I had no support or a step up to get out on my own, so marriage was the only out I could find. If I'd been stronger, like I am now, maybe I could have done more.
@FalloutUrMum
@FalloutUrMum 2 жыл бұрын
You still have life ahead of you
@moniquemosley2122
@moniquemosley2122 2 жыл бұрын
Now that you know better, you can do better. ~Maya Angelou. Don't beat yourself up; please pursue what you would like to have now. Wishing you the best. 🙂
@UptownAlleyFashion
@UptownAlleyFashion 2 жыл бұрын
You did the right thing by getting married instead of trying to be an individual.
@kaleomariz1000
@kaleomariz1000 2 жыл бұрын
Is your husband at least nice and understanding? Because marriage is not a bad thing unless you have a person that is controlling and not caring about the needs of your soul.
@joycekennedy5252
@joycekennedy5252 2 жыл бұрын
For many of us ..boomer here
@tamarrajames3590
@tamarrajames3590 2 жыл бұрын
I can relate to a lot of her story. I was Married and a Mother at 16. My Husband and I participated in the counter culture movement of the 60s and I was widowed at 23. There were so many things going on in those times, and young people were pulled in so many different directions that it was hard to find stability. Looking back from my 70s, I do not regret any part of my life…they were interesting times, and I learned a lot. This woman speaks with real clarity about her experiences and feelings. Thank you David for sharing her with us.🖤🇨🇦
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you Tamarra. Married at 16 and a mother at 16 must have been tough. David Hoffman filmmaker
@tamarrajames3590
@tamarrajames3590 2 жыл бұрын
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker it had its difficulties to be sure, but there were a lot of young couples at the time and we tended to help each other. Being widowed young as I was seriously messed me up for awhile, but I just celebrated 46 years with my Husband, and through all the trials, life has been good to me.🖤🇨🇦
@tundrawomansays5067
@tundrawomansays5067 2 жыл бұрын
@@tamarrajames3590 Ms. James, I have so enjoyed your comments throughout this series, thank you. Married at 16 especially in rural areas was not exceptional at that time. I was also widowed very young but have never remarried. All these decades later, I still love my husband, miss him beyond words and I’m getting quite close to death which I know will relieve the suffering of loving a partner who isn’t and hasn’t been around. I don’t talk about any of this IRL because so few remember my late husband; I can’t even remember the last time someone mentioned his name. Anyway, thank you very much for sharing your experiences and insights. Just wanted you to know an old widow broad living in the boonies thinks you’re one cool lady ;-)
@tamarrajames3590
@tamarrajames3590 2 жыл бұрын
@@tundrawomansays5067 Thank you so much Tundrawoman.I’m sorry you had to go through that loss too. I had never intended to Marry again, but a good man found me, and he was determined…and patient. Eventually I fell in love again, he doesn’t replace Rory, and he has never tried to, he just found there was room in my heart for him. We have shared many happy and loving years…and we aren’t done yet, although my Husband is battling cancer now, we can still travel and do things we enjoy together. Other people always move past a death that doesn’t significantly alter their lives (and often expect us to). It is hard when so many things remind you of your loved one. You see something and think, “wait until he hears this”, before remembering he won’t hear it. Love is a true constant, and when one’s partner is gone, love remains…it isn’t a switch we can turn on and off. I think a lot of people, even Family and close Friends feel that mourning has a period and then is over, they don’t understand. It takes a year or more before you remember the loved one is gone reliably…you cook for two, you are at a bit of a loss on Anniversaries and holidays…and that is okay. The one thing you can’t do is settle for something or someone that is less than what you had. No one will EVE be the same, but real love can blossom without taking away from what you had. My Grandmother just waited until she could join my Granther after he died. She wasn’t in a hurry, and she gardened and did things that brought her happiness, and she couldn’t have remarried, he was her joy and love through War, Great Depression, War again, and so much world change…she was content having loved, and being loved in return. They were self sufficiency farmers with a small commercial orchard in the interior of B.C. I spent formative years on that farm, and learned so much from it. I live in cities now since age 7, but spent Summers on the farm to avoid polio season, which was a great childhood. Sorry I started to write a novel, but I DO understand your choice to not marry again. I’m glad you enjoy my comments, and that you felt moved to share our similarities with me. Wishing you a glorious Spring, and bright blessings.🖤🇨🇦
@SusanWojcickiDidntEarnHerJob
@SusanWojcickiDidntEarnHerJob 2 жыл бұрын
Hippies ruined this country, then the bleeding hearts and feminists that were mainstreamed by them killed what was left.
@bugyourparents
@bugyourparents 2 жыл бұрын
Always a treat to spend some time with one of your time-capsuled personalities. How she describes the 60s sounds a lil like what’s been happening now.
@thestraightroad305
@thestraightroad305 2 жыл бұрын
As a 70 year old I wish I could sit down and talk with her…today is like the 60s cubed.
@Jantonov1
@Jantonov1 Жыл бұрын
@@thestraightroad305 But without the good music!
@hoodwerksgarage
@hoodwerksgarage 2 жыл бұрын
David just out of curiosity are the videos you post videos you have personal filmed or do you just curate vintage videos? Regardless as a 27 year old I enjoy the look into the past. 👍🏼
@myfavoriteplanet3247
@myfavoriteplanet3247 2 жыл бұрын
The Boomers: Split in half between Leave It To Beaver world and Vietnam.
@faithunseen123
@faithunseen123 2 жыл бұрын
What a lovely, classy lady that shared interesting perspectives of the times and events of her generation. If she is still alive,maybe in her 80"s?I would Love to hear views of the times and events of the last 3 decades!
@cyndik9921
@cyndik9921 2 жыл бұрын
This lady is so different than our mom was. Maybe always living in rural areas made a difference. I like listening to her. Thank you for sharing this!
@peternicholson2504
@peternicholson2504 2 жыл бұрын
This lady has described her life and her view and experience of the 1950s and 60s very well. Thanks for showing this interview which is a important recording of the times.
@ticketyboo1215
@ticketyboo1215 2 жыл бұрын
What a wonderful woman … very articulate and interesting to listen too. Thank you David. I hope all is good with you and your family 🇬🇧
@rudytormento9753
@rudytormento9753 2 жыл бұрын
She covered so many topics about that time period in 8 mns that's amazing !
@mauiskater
@mauiskater 2 жыл бұрын
Do you know if she’s still alive? Would love to know her perspective now!!
@Gallus-gallus
@Gallus-gallus 2 жыл бұрын
Wow, such an eloquent and self-conscious person!
@Zizie_sc
@Zizie_sc 2 жыл бұрын
This is truly heavy and important stuff here… thank you David. And I hope many others can see the likeness between this documentation and todays world we live in…
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that KZbin is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts. David Hoffman filmmaker
@ViveSemelBeneVivere
@ViveSemelBeneVivere Жыл бұрын
Not mentioned much or anywhere in comments, but I think the reserved attitudes of the 1950s were a direct consequence of surviving WW II. The war made people understand that life basics - home, food, education, job, all providing sense of safety - were the most important objectives and everything else was secondary or gratuitous. Hence those "quiet years". Then with incerasing prosperity the 1960s were a reaction to and release from that. These are great interview documentaries.
@anthonyreyes3762
@anthonyreyes3762 2 жыл бұрын
Wow this is so classic. What an amazing snapshot in time. Do you know if this women is still alive?
@badger297
@badger297 2 жыл бұрын
I fucking love this channel. I could watch these all day
@aaroncole7736
@aaroncole7736 2 жыл бұрын
This is very important. Thank you Dave!
@suem6004
@suem6004 2 жыл бұрын
Most I know do not engage in premarital sex male and female. But we do not have living in and 14 year engagements. Strongest marriages out there. I am glad I waited. I am worth it.
@shellyscholz1256
@shellyscholz1256 2 жыл бұрын
I very much appreciate this woman and her honesty about the sixties. These were the sentiments of my parents, aunts and uncles. At first it seemed that protestors were well intended but their was more than one line that they crossed. The good intentions of stopping war vs the way our troops were treated when they came home. The good intentions of keeping an open mind vs LSD, etc. The good intentions of wanting equality vs the people who had to work their tails off to actually be treated equally while those who screamed for equality did little more than scream.
@yeti4269
@yeti4269 2 жыл бұрын
I love hearing these old takes. It really makes me think deeper.
@gailkelly4651
@gailkelly4651 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you. You put a lot of work into your videos and it shows.
@JohnfromWaterFrontVillige
@JohnfromWaterFrontVillige 2 жыл бұрын
Raising both sons and a daughter did change my perspective on how different it is for men and women to choose a career path as they become adults. I wouldn’t want my daughter to have to settle for a marriage and have to rely on someone to support her. I’m glad some things have changed.
@JohnfromWaterFrontVillige
@JohnfromWaterFrontVillige 2 жыл бұрын
@@madashell7224 the thought of my daughter staying in a bad marriage because she doesn’t have a career to support herself made me push her harder while she was growing up. Although she’s still young and unmarried she is starting her own career and can support herself. People change over time and in 15 years the best marriage could become broken and miserable. And I never liked the idea of my kids relying on other people as adults.
@wenmoonson
@wenmoonson 2 жыл бұрын
1 granddog/cat coming soon!
@whoareyoutoaccuseme
@whoareyoutoaccuseme 2 жыл бұрын
@@wenmoonson we can only hope he's also instilled in her that her existence isn't to breed more humans on an already overpopulated earth.
@kaleomariz1000
@kaleomariz1000 2 жыл бұрын
@@madashell7224 So, did you end up with a good husband??
@madrigale6396
@madrigale6396 2 жыл бұрын
This was very illuminating!
@CJ-bu8mh
@CJ-bu8mh 2 жыл бұрын
I married at 18 in 1971 and my husband and I chose to not replicate our genes. We both had the same severe disease in a sibling and didn't want to risk it. There was a book back then called The Baby Trap by Ellen Peck. She formed a group called NON, the National Organization of Non-Parents, supporting the concept of thoughtfully choosing to be a parent. We were called selfish, of course, but forged ahead, confident in our choice. We were photographed and interviewed for the Baltimore Sunday Sun Magazine and Esquire. I was devastated by the title on the Esquire article "Do Americans Suddenly Hate Kids." Made me cry, that was so not our truth. Found out the writer was Catholic, so what we believed was right for us was just plain wrong to him. Now, nearly 70, I am grateful my husband and I took counsel with a genetic doctor and made the medical choice to be absolutely certain we did not add to problem of replicating bad genes. Especially now, that I developed that disease myself. This woman was so fascinating to watch, thank you. I appreciate how much attention she paid to what was happening in our world and our country and hope she still is.
@wenmoonson
@wenmoonson 2 жыл бұрын
Plenty of kids in need of adoption by loving parents, I think your decision was just fine!
@Hemulionbotanisti
@Hemulionbotanisti 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you! I like her! Honest, intelligent and wise. And gorgeous of course! 😊❤🙏
@chickenflavor9880
@chickenflavor9880 2 жыл бұрын
The more I hear about the 60s the more confused I get.
@elenabob4953
@elenabob4953 2 жыл бұрын
Many times the official story said one thing but the lived experience is another.
@RavenNl403
@RavenNl403 2 жыл бұрын
I was certainly born in the wrong Era. Thank you David. You always make me smile. What wonderful work you have done over the years.
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you Raven for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that KZbin is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts. David Hoffman filmmaker
@RavenNl403
@RavenNl403 2 жыл бұрын
I will check it hat out. Thank you David. 😊
@RavenNl403
@RavenNl403 2 жыл бұрын
Check it out. Silly phone....
@heatherdeladurantaye3121
@heatherdeladurantaye3121 2 жыл бұрын
This is an excellent interview. #KineticAwesomeness 😎🔥
@themysticmuse1111
@themysticmuse1111 Жыл бұрын
Here, following, the man from the 50s, vid. This stuff is wonderful. Very important these REAL stories, live on, lest history repeats....
@death2pc
@death2pc 2 жыл бұрын
Great woman. Beautiful. What year was this filmed........?
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Read the description please.
@michaelremer7721
@michaelremer7721 2 жыл бұрын
Where is her accent from? I’m from Philadelphia and it sounds familiar. But could be Midwest too
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Chicago.
@astroletras
@astroletras 2 жыл бұрын
Amazing job as always ❤️
@Rogueixpresents
@Rogueixpresents 2 жыл бұрын
The stuff you upload it just pure gold, Thank you!
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you.
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that KZbin is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts. David Hoffman filmmaker
@branscombe_
@branscombe_ 2 жыл бұрын
wholesome lady thanks david
@JomarAF
@JomarAF Жыл бұрын
I love interviews like this where you can just see ordinary lives, from different eras and with different ways of life. You don't have to agree with everything they say or feel like there should be some comparison between you, but in an era in which people villainize anybody with a different way of life, it really is humanizing to see things like this.
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker Жыл бұрын
Thank you Jomar for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that KZbin is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts. David Hoffman filmmaker
@ShoutItFromTheHousetops
@ShoutItFromTheHousetops 2 жыл бұрын
How refreshing this is.
@michaelcondrey3510
@michaelcondrey3510 2 жыл бұрын
This women is elegant and has a cool a haircut
@thesatisfiedcustomer4869
@thesatisfiedcustomer4869 2 жыл бұрын
what a lovely, elegant, articulate lady.
@ericscaillet2232
@ericscaillet2232 Жыл бұрын
our present generation could use a few tips here....
@BrianHolmes
@BrianHolmes 2 жыл бұрын
Interesting how she thought the lady Era was creating a crazy society but the reality of the evangelical movement makes the drug Era look sane in comparison.
@dotheyfloat9961
@dotheyfloat9961 2 жыл бұрын
We're all but puppets of the stars, the 1960's was when the Uranus/Pluto conjunction phase of the synodic cycle happened producing a progressive cultural revolution.
@ChelseaLori
@ChelseaLori Жыл бұрын
Did you interview POC of the same era?
@RLLUMB
@RLLUMB Жыл бұрын
So today she is or would be 82 years young! Hope she is still with us.
@user-yk9sk7pg6v
@user-yk9sk7pg6v 2 жыл бұрын
Fascinating videos.
@matthewfarmer6830
@matthewfarmer6830 2 жыл бұрын
David Hoffman I like the way you write and show your collection of photos, there neat. It's good to see this about Gett married first and then have children, Thanks for sharing.📽️
@radtothepowerofsick1
@radtothepowerofsick1 2 жыл бұрын
Saddest thing is 70 years later and society is still asleep. Believing everything mainstream media says to be true and blindly following the government's orders
@davidellis5141
@davidellis5141 2 жыл бұрын
Nothing wrong with real family values. 👪
@mesalouis8976
@mesalouis8976 2 жыл бұрын
👏🏾 now women are having a million kids out of wedlock and complaining how “there no good men left.”
@ssseeeaaa
@ssseeeaaa 2 жыл бұрын
You can have family values and make your own money.😐
@Jesse__H
@Jesse__H 2 жыл бұрын
Nothing wrong with choosing what that means, either!
@testacals
@testacals 5 ай бұрын
@@mesalouis8976 Having children out of wedlock is still a fairly uncommon incident
@starababa1985
@starababa1985 Жыл бұрын
One of the advantages that existed for centuries in the Catholic Church was that single women could enter the convent and pursue a career in a self-supporting female community. Over time the variety of work options increased and included nursing, teaching, administration, vocational training, small-scale manufacturing in cloisters and missionary work. This may not seem like a very wide range of choices now, but years back, it was viewed as quite exciting and adventurous for a girl disinclined toward marriage. In Belgium there were also large communities of unprofessed, religious-minded single women known as the Beguines. These ladies, which included widows with young children, supported themselves and each other with a wide range of work and were also engaged in charity towards the poor. Some members chose to live in their own homes, while others shared accommodations. This organization was founded in the Middle Ages and continued into modern times, spreading beyond Belgian borders. In America the Shakers were a mixed gender, single community dedicated to Christian values and the communal life. So the options were out there, but the absence of informative sources may have resulted in many young women choosing a life unsuited to their temperament.
@AstroMartine
@AstroMartine 2 жыл бұрын
I honestly find it ridiculous that women's sexual status is the so important that it gets put in the title. There are probably more women staying celibate today well into their 20s and 30s than there ever were in the past, just because women now have the option of not relying on sex to survive.
@emmabennett7699
@emmabennett7699 2 жыл бұрын
This is an interesting video and I liked hearing what the general mindset of the 50s and 60s was. When she described everyone in the 50s as "asleep" to the issues of the time I thought damn, that makes so much sense. I'm young and I like that I was born in this generation, wouldn't have it any other way. I think sex before marriage is harmless and I don't really care if someone waits for marriage or not. I just feel bad that she felt like she had no other options.
@steveshirley2250
@steveshirley2250 2 жыл бұрын
Whats up with the title? That took up 20 seconds in an almost 9 min video.
@mauiskater
@mauiskater 2 жыл бұрын
I was mesmerized by this. She would be the same age as my mother. It is so interesting as a woman to see how far we come. But also that we have the same struggles every‘s generation. There’s always going to be that generation gap. I’m already feeling it now that I am in my 50s with the younger people. I think this will be continuing till the end of time. I’m just glad us women have more options now. Very very good video thank you for sharing
@richardcaven
@richardcaven 2 жыл бұрын
you have caught a moment showing our transition from hunter/gather mentality to modern modern way of life.
@cherylcallahan5402
@cherylcallahan5402 2 жыл бұрын
*David Hoffman no sex before marriage 50s sixty she changed Manson murders ended this debacle appreciate your videos Listening from Mass USA TYVM 💙 David*
@godfreycarmichael
@godfreycarmichael 2 жыл бұрын
Many people reference the Manson murders and the Altamont concert as the end of the vibe of the 60s. Societal chaos comes and goes. I think we are in a era of such chaos now.
@abdelhamidsherif4995
@abdelhamidsherif4995 Жыл бұрын
Exactly, the hippie movement came to an abrupt ending when the "love" and "Peace" communes progressed in murderous and suicidal cults and the HIV pandemic came; then the survivors retreated, went back to Church, picked up the pieces, married and became the new conservative parents that they didn't like as kids..... the heaven of the liberated could be a hellish landscape pretty fast, making the sheltered oppressive life, much more appealing
@valmontrealquebec5459
@valmontrealquebec5459 2 жыл бұрын
Loving your content!
@tombob671
@tombob671 3 ай бұрын
I am thinking of my grandparents born around 1900, and were farmers in Oklahoma. Both grandmas were equal partners in the dfamily farm. Both were capableto run them when Grandpa fell ill and died. I look back and marvel t what great ladies they were.
@SELKCOMM
@SELKCOMM 2 жыл бұрын
Powerful.
@Kzvuyp
@Kzvuyp 2 жыл бұрын
Her words resonate today in 2022
@harperwelch5147
@harperwelch5147 2 жыл бұрын
I was born in 1952. I didn’t come out until I was 30 years old. That’s how difficult it was to go beyond what others expected of you, rather than figure out what you wanted or felt. Thank god things have changed for the better.
@wenmoonson
@wenmoonson 2 жыл бұрын
Yes we certainly are at the apex of human civilization.
@luckydave328
@luckydave328 2 жыл бұрын
People praising these values are forgetting the persecution and ostracization of those women who fell outside of this. It was very one-sided. Men were not tarnished in the same way. I'm not surprised that this beautiful woman was a cheerleader. She is also very intelligent and realises how limiting and stifling that 50s culture was for women. She was very aware of what went wrong in the 60s too though. Very astute and observant lady.
@suem6004
@suem6004 2 жыл бұрын
Oh stop it. Nothing wrong with a woman choosing self respect.
@gt4654
@gt4654 2 жыл бұрын
What are you talking about?!! Who was persecuting who?!?! It was the 50s!!! There was nothing going on or do anyway. Life was hard, and things worked this way for centuries before washing machines and all the modern commodities were invented. There was not even running water or electricity in many places back then..... Why the need to complain and blame some imaginary enemies?!?!?
@luckydave328
@luckydave328 2 жыл бұрын
@@gt4654 Either you weren't there or you were living a fairly priviliged lifestyle. I'm going by what I actually experienced and witnessed. Post war Britain. Nothing imaginary about it.
@j0JP
@j0JP 2 жыл бұрын
These commets below yours are so stupid oh my god
@steelstreet3765
@steelstreet3765 2 жыл бұрын
My mom is 70 and she is from that era thinking like her.
@michaelremer7721
@michaelremer7721 2 жыл бұрын
What is a confidential secretary?
@sirgeorge8522
@sirgeorge8522 2 жыл бұрын
I will be interesting to see an honest look back At today, and the roles that are expected to be played
@SunnyIlha
@SunnyIlha 2 жыл бұрын
This is really good thing, for sure. Back in the day when Mother, Wife, Lady The Woman, was Queen. And the Center of the Universe of The Family. The HomeMaker. Who was IN CHARGE. She's so correct too, the 60's rolled out and things got crazy. There was definite internal turmoil in American Society. There was no threat from the outside; it was just internally roiling. Like, boiling.
@FalloutUrMum
@FalloutUrMum 2 жыл бұрын
I'm 23, my girlfriend is 22, been together for 8 years. We're both waiting until marriage before sex
@sock7481
@sock7481 2 жыл бұрын
no way
@thisisme3238
@thisisme3238 2 жыл бұрын
Hmmmm 🤔
@chickenflavor9880
@chickenflavor9880 2 жыл бұрын
Good job.
@elenabob4953
@elenabob4953 2 жыл бұрын
Don't wait too much and be careful not to drift appart because you grow up and you start wanting completely different things.
@luxuryqueen42
@luxuryqueen42 2 жыл бұрын
🤔🤔🤔
@mikebunch5553
@mikebunch5553 2 жыл бұрын
Man have times changed .
@wastedspam385
@wastedspam385 2 жыл бұрын
Videos like this envoke a strong sense of sonder
@guiandre9347
@guiandre9347 2 жыл бұрын
Let's bring these women back.
@christophe36000
@christophe36000 2 жыл бұрын
Life was much simple before, it was better
@treefiddy5424
@treefiddy5424 2 жыл бұрын
WOW this lady would be 82 today....
@thisisme3238
@thisisme3238 2 жыл бұрын
Not disagreeing, but that world seems like a fairy tale world in comparison to today's world in 2022.
@elenabob4953
@elenabob4953 2 жыл бұрын
It seems also tat people had a calm and another pase than. Now everyone seems to be in a hurry, to what nobody knows but in a hurry nevertheless.
@thisisme3238
@thisisme3238 2 жыл бұрын
@@elenabob4953 Agree, in a hurry for nothing and in a hurry to get there soon.
@lilramennoodle8056
@lilramennoodle8056 2 жыл бұрын
@@thisisme3238 call it live fast asf and die young
@maleaJ4743
@maleaJ4743 2 жыл бұрын
I wonder how she is doing now
@mohammedashian8094
@mohammedashian8094 Жыл бұрын
I kinda like the way she says “absolutely not.” For some reason
@andylindsey
@andylindsey 2 жыл бұрын
This is a great interview. I feel like she's describing. I look at the world around me and wonder what the heck is going on!
@3sm_yyy13
@3sm_yyy13 2 жыл бұрын
“It’s not premarital sex if you never get married”
@BlackGuardXIII
@BlackGuardXIII 2 жыл бұрын
OMG! Thank you for that. Made my day. 👏🏻
@ericscaillet2232
@ericscaillet2232 Жыл бұрын
Amazing how apeman is always looking for a gap....if you never get married according to legalities set by man pershaps ,however once with another person for awhile you are in reality married per se, anything else any descent woman better keep away ,or man for that matter ,sluts comes in both sexes.
@luciehanson6250
@luciehanson6250 2 жыл бұрын
Thanks!
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker
@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Lucie for your contributions to my creative efforts. Right now, as I write you, I am in Yosemite Park for the night with Heidi and have not been here for quite a while. The temperature is not too cold although there is snow on the ground. It is quite beautiful. What is the first time you visited the park? How old were you? David
@luciehanson6250
@luciehanson6250 2 жыл бұрын
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker Great news for Heidi and you! Enjoy! I was there late 80s, in my early 30s. Only time! Must make it back! Is it the quiet season there now? I went in the summer, it was packed with humanity, but I could still look up!
@JWF99
@JWF99 2 жыл бұрын
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmakerTalk about things you'd like to do! "Happy Talk, keep talking"🎵🎶 lol ha ha! Stay warm you two! & Enjoy being "high" up in the mountains! ✌😎✌
@luciehanson6250
@luciehanson6250 2 жыл бұрын
@@JWF99 My comment during David's life stream was: I thought it went,"Goin honky tonking, honky tonkin! My adults never corrected me. I now stand corrected.
@JWF99
@JWF99 2 жыл бұрын
@@luciehanson6250 Lol dear Lucie, I've made up plenty of my own words to many songs! Some are soooo embarrassing, I'd never even speak of it! Too darn funny! :):))))
@stayhumble88z
@stayhumble88z 2 жыл бұрын
7:35 Facts just my opinion
@echodelta2172
@echodelta2172 2 жыл бұрын
If it's of any consolation to her now, women are relearning all over again how much more important it is to have a family than to slave away in a cubicle.
@shells500tutubo
@shells500tutubo 2 жыл бұрын
Women have always known that. The real question is do MEN know that?
@mohammedashian8094
@mohammedashian8094 Жыл бұрын
@@shells500tutubo as a man myself I would have to say no
@testacals
@testacals 5 ай бұрын
If anything, it's the men who are workaholic.
@kathleenreyes4345
@kathleenreyes4345 2 жыл бұрын
Yeah…that was a really different time! I was born in 1958 and when I got to my teenage years, I was part of a new generation that started pushing back and rebelling!!
@Hmm-pn2xx
@Hmm-pn2xx 2 жыл бұрын
It seems she did everything she felt was right. Was a cheerleader- got married to a man. Its odd how she demonizes doing what feels “right or good”. She did just that. It scares me when people think there is ONE way. I also wish women realized even today. Churches talk about your abstinence bc they are fetishizing it and preying in you. Step outside of church and no one is so obsessed with you “being a good girl” Protect yourself and follow your morals.
@erwinsmith1324
@erwinsmith1324 2 жыл бұрын
Why would the church fetishize abstinence. How would it benefit the church ?
@Hmm-pn2xx
@Hmm-pn2xx 2 жыл бұрын
@@erwinsmith1324 the head of churches are men. It benefits them bc they are raising these girls to serve men. How do you serve a man that believes you are his property?
@Hmm-pn2xx
@Hmm-pn2xx 2 жыл бұрын
They are raising men and women that justify abuse. I’m glad my mom took me out of the Catholic Church at 8
@erwinsmith1324
@erwinsmith1324 2 жыл бұрын
@@Hmm-pn2xx I'm pretty sure the church also promotes abstinence for men too. Does that mean that they are being raised to serve women? I think being chaste is more of a way to show religious devotion in this case and not what you are making it out to be.
@Hmm-pn2xx
@Hmm-pn2xx 2 жыл бұрын
@@erwinsmith1324 well sexual abuse is rampant for boys too. I wouldn’t put my family in any church. Plenty to hide behind when you’re a holy man or woman.
@Halak014
@Halak014 2 жыл бұрын
This just makes me think that maybe letting women start a carer in there mid 30 after an early motherhood sounds like Modern Traditional ideal, having it be more accepted to marry early and being a homemaker because some that have done this Tradition, marry and stay at home mom deal, often get humiliated on social media/ television. for being "regressive to the movement".
@TheEnlightenedFool
@TheEnlightenedFool 2 жыл бұрын
Wow, not much has changed.... I am surprised.
@StandinHolyPlaces
@StandinHolyPlaces 2 жыл бұрын
Is she talking about 2022?
@CrookedRosePOD
@CrookedRosePOD 2 жыл бұрын
I always wished I grew up in the 50s. My favorite time in america minus the racism
@mohammedashian8094
@mohammedashian8094 Жыл бұрын
Racism is in every time it’s as old as history
@tomswan3401
@tomswan3401 2 жыл бұрын
Also in the tales of the brothers grimm no one has 6, but suddenly everybody has children (miracle). Like in the new testament.^^
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