QAC 68 - 3 Months on T: Libido Changes || Non-Binary | Asexual || The T Files

[@alicaradec8545]

Thank you so much for sharing

[@QueerAsCat]

thanks for watching and commenting. much appreciated. :)

[@siginotmylastname3969]

Joining the crowd in loving the voice drop!!!

[@siginotmylastname3969]

Also how are you so informative, I love it. Temperature changes just sound irritating tbh.

[@QueerAsCat]

thanks! i appreciate you watching and commenting. :) and yeah, temperature change does suck, imho.

[@lillianmsp4059]

Thank you so much for making this series. As a fellow afab non-binary asexual this not only helps me to understand what changes to expect from testosterone and in what order/severity, but also how it may interact with my identities. Our identities are not entirely the same, as I identify as agender (even if we did use the same labels, we're still different people, so our experiences would still be different!), but it still gives me a very personal-feeling insight into testosterone. I think I have fully decided that testosterone isn't for me. There are only a couple things I particularly wanted out of t, that being a slightly lower voice and the ability to more easily gain muscle mass (and therefore alter my body shape). The voice drop is permanent so once I stopped t that change would remain, which seemed great. However, one particular thing that has been brought to my attention is bottom growth; it seems to happen very soon after starting t and it isn't reversible, and the idea of that gives me far more dysphoria than the idea of getting the things I actually want out of t. After seeing lots of people's experiences with t I've realised that, considering all the effects, it would probably make me more dysphoric to go on it than remain off it. As for my voice and body shape, I am comfortable with altering them in alternative ways. I have been on-and-off voice training and muscle building and I have noticed some results (even though not very significant) that make me more comfortable with myself. I do want top surgery, which seems like it's going to be a fight against all the gatekeeping, but hopefully I can get it sooner rather than later. Thank you so much for helping me figure out what steps are the right ones for me to take in my transition. Best of luck to you in yours. ^-^

[@QueerAsCat]

hello and thank you for watching and for your thoughtful comment. i'm honored to have helped you in your personal decision-making process in regards to HRT and i wish you all the best pursuing whatever you decide you do want to pursue for yourself, including top surgery. gatekeepers can stfu and stay the hell at of your and my way, because they can't stop either of us from the self-care that is any act of taking control of one's own body and (dis)comfort in it. :) best wishes~

[@KrisfiberANDarts]

Holy voice drop! Congrats!

[@QueerAsCat]

thanks. :)

[@queerinamirror247]

Your voice has definitely dropped! Wow. That’s so cool. 💕😍💕

[@softspasoundsasmr9048]

I hear a change in your voice! New voice is very nice sounding I think. Love seeing an update from you! I think every other month t files makes sense. I fidget a lot and had a lot acne too. Squishing a handful of silly putty is reeeeeally nice. I'm autistic and need routine for mental health and a daily skin care routine kinda killed two birds with one stone. Really great video vesper thank you so much for sharing your experience 🤗

[@QueerAsCat]

thanks for watching and commenting! sounds like i definitely need to try and find some silly putty. hmm...

[@heyy_trixxy]

voice change voice change voice change!!!!!!!

[@QueerAsCat]

yaassssssss!!

[@unspokenvoices3399]

I for sure heard a voice change from the beginning of this video !

[@Billyboicos]

Ooh I'm a skinpicker too! Worrisome if t makes my acne flare-up.

[@ZiggiWillpower]

Yay for no monthly hell! and your voice is really noticeably different!! in regards to picking: I recently got the advise to wear gloves when I’m in the bathroom (and see my face in the mirror - triggers picking for me). it reeeeeally helps, i just use regular single use medical gloves when washing my face etc, so my fingers can’t feel the texture of the skin as much. hope you have a great month!

[@QueerAsCat]

interesting advice! i wish there was a clear trigger for me to try and circumnavigate / manage... i mean, feeling my skin can be a trigger, but that isnt specific to me being in front of a mirror or anything... regardless, though, it's still food for thought and i'm glad you've found something that's helpful to you.

[@KrisfiberANDarts]

Omg get an Aaron’s crazy putty and pull and pick at it. It helps me TONS with anxiety

[@QueerAsCat]

interesting idea! thanks for that. :)

[@Darkoshi]

Hi Vesper, thanks for sharing your experiences. It's interesting to hear about going on T from the perspective of an ace person, and also what it is like in Japan. I do hear a difference in your voice; it's both a little bit deeper, and seems more smooth than before. About your anemia before going on T, just wondering if your doctor ever tested your B12 levels? From what I've read, being low in B12 can also result in anemia.

[@arsgoeboy]

It’s very interesting that your cycle stopped so soon but I think it really is your dose. My boyfriend’s stopped at around this point because he pretty quickly went to full dose. I started with gel in March 2017, and then by August 2017 I was still menstruating so I switched to injections but I had moved and was with a different doctor so she didn’t understand gel dosage and kept me on a low dose for another six months, thinking it would be equivalent to my full gel dosage (which was already not satisfactory for me). So I’m still waiting for my period to go away, on injections, because my T level was actually in the normal male range. The dose I had was 50mg a week. I also didn’t have considerable voice or hair changes so I finally demanded to go up to at least 80mg a week (which still isn’t full dose because full dose is 100mg weekly or 200mg every two weeks) and now it’s been eight weeks on this dose and my last period was 50 days ago. FINALLY. Before that I started spotting but I still had regular cycles. A whole year after starting T and I’m pretty much where you are at 3 months. But I’m also black and with weak “masculine” genes so idk if that’s part of it too. But yeah, I genuinely believe that if you’re putting in at least 80mg into your body at once, it doesn’t matter that it’s averaging a low 40mg a week. Your body is going to react strongly to that high peak.

[@arsgoeboy]

TMI: the only thing that happened to me that was on the same timeline as you and most other people on testosterone was genital growth. I got really sensitive early on, and I saw most of my growth within three months

[@QueerAsCat]

thanks for sharing your experiences. it's interesting to hear about the differences between your timeline in regards to changes and mine.... i'm at 100mg every 2 weeks, but i suspect that my body is reacting so quickly / markedly to being on T because my T levels pre-HRT were actually barely even in the range of normal for an estrogen-based body..... so even at a dosage that would be "low" enough as to not produce such changes in others is "high" enough by my body's standards as to produce such changes in me? which just makes me that much happier that i insisted on starting out "low" even by others' standards and resist doctors' insistence on starting out higher.

[@MaRevasserie]

Thank you for these informative updates! [CW: talking about menstruation] ... I am a non-binary afab person and not on HRT, but have been able to eliminate my menstruation by getting a hormonal IUD. I just got my 2nd one last year, after having had one in for the last 5 years and I haven't menstruated in 6 years now (besides light spotting in the first year). There are also newer versions that last about 3 years, but have a lower hormone dosis to decrease the chances of side effects (I have been lucky to have non - as far as I am aware). Unpleasant experience to get an IUD implanted, especially as a trans*/gender non-conforming person, but it has been totally worth it for me.

[@raidyl2823]

It is fact that woman typically do feel the cold more than men... I guess this is hormone related or related to the changes that happen as a result of these hormonal differences... interesting

[@Enkiaswad]

The 2kg could be some muscle building up. Also even a small dose of testosterone will throw off the estrogen balance, so it's plausible that the monthly hell stops, it even stops on some birth control.

[@QueerAsCat]

hoping that muscle is what it is... 🤞🏿

[@LoudlyListening]

Skins picking solidarity

[@CatBarefield]

YOUR VOICE! :o

[@donavercricket8864]

If it means anything, after the first year of me being on T the libido part chilled way the fuck out? Like it was wayyy annoying (I'm grey-A) but it's calmed down and I don't get anything... unexpected I guess? Anyway, it's cool to see other nonbinary black (and ace!) folks experiences with stuff

[@QueerAsCat]

thanks for watching and commenting! the libido thing is good to hear, although i doubt i'll stay on T anywhere near that long. it's still reassuring to hear. also, it is indeed cool to meet a fellow black non-binary ace. :)