r/AmITheA**hole for Not Giving My Sister My Inheritance Money?

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP and her sister inherited some money from their deceased father. The sister spent her inheritance on a new car and home improvements, despite the fact that her husband is chronically ill. Eventually, the inevitable happens and OP's brother-in-law needs surgery. OP's sister asks OP for her inheritance money to save his life, but OP refuses. Does that make him the butthole?
🍑 r/AmITheA**hole For Firing My Spoiled Son After He Stole From My Company? • r/AmITheA**hole For Fi...
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"Sneaky Snitch" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com), License: CC By Attribution 3.0

[@Nerobyrne]

"most other family members have already cut her off" Oh, yeah, there's your proof right there. You will NEVER get the money back, as apparently she already owes money to half your family at least.

[@1985toyotacamry]

Yeah that's a red flag from the start

[@johnnyhuntrero6870]

If she has money to buy a Luxury house and expensive cars then she has enough to pay for the surgery.

[@ReigoVassal]

The red flag is too big they're doesn't realize it was a red flag.

[@gothicgolem2947]

They probably did cause either her husband did similar stuff to what she did to ops father or did other mean stuff we don’t know it was cause of money

[@MakenaForest]

@@ReigoVassal the red flag is so big that it looks more like a blackened sky

[@maggie1201]

The story with Molly: Yes it's important for kids to learn that sometimes things get ruined, but its also important that they learn that they can fix ruined things. It wasn't OP's daughter's idea to invite Molly. Why should she have to suffer with a ruined birthday because of someone else? Life may not be fair but your family should be a safe landing place where fairness is attempted to be reached as much as possible

[@RedRum013]

I agree. I would say not giving her the "make up" movie would be a buthole move.

[@richardp5920]

My question is: where the hell was Molly’s mom? Who leaves their special needs kid with someone they barely know, that has no experience with handling that? 0.5/5 buttholes at least for that.

[@xenathornburg2416]

The mom should have made it clear to op about what can trigger molly. Why would you drop your special needs kid with a person who clearly doesn't understand the condition she's in.

[@sagesaria]

That's pretty much what I said when Mark Narrations covered this story, too. Namely because one of the comments said to frame it as a way of thanking the daughter for at least attempting to include Molly, which I thought was a great idea because it also meant that it showed the daughter that her party being ruined wasn't her fault or a punishment. The father is technically right that sometimes things are ruined, but I don't think it's unfair to make up what one can; it's not like they're doing a makeup Disneyland trip or something.

[@jaeboogie118]

@@sagesaria Right! I feel like that’s least OP can do because she’s teaching her daughter “Hey, you gave up your special day to make someone else happy and please them- so it’s only fair to at least take you for pizza and do a make up movie for the movie you missed.” It’s teaching the principal of kindness and self sacrifice. Besides the husband is acting like she’s doing a whole sleepover etc like doing the whole night over again.

[@just-eden]

Im vegan and I would make him clean the freezer, too. What he did was uncalled for and actions have consequences...

[@qdllc]

This. It’s not disrespectful of someone’s beliefs to make them clean up their own mess.

[@youmaybehighstrungbutimlok1601]

I would do the same thing if my kid did that. It was least he could do. Because of what he did that deer died for nothing and was a complete waste. If he really cares for the animals then he wouldn’t have done that.

[@Swisso_]

Question for you (Couse Ur vegan) Do you get mad of People eating McDonald’s Or do you just feel uncomfortable ?? Would like to know How you feel!

[@radhiadeedou8286]

Agreed, I also don't understand how buying a new freezer is a solution, what are they gonna do with the old one? They can't donate it and let the people who get it deal with the gross mess, are they gonna throw away a functioning freezer?

[@daniella9787]

@@radhiadeedou8286 well what are the options they have for a functioning freezer that smells like rotting meat? Can't sell that! Thay's a butthole move and can't use it or the smell can affect the taste of the meat. Is there a way to reupholster the inside? 😅 a weird question but if it's possible id'd do that and then sell it. Knowing it's a working freezer and has no smell is a great selling point. Can't keep it. It'd be a reminder everytime i'd look at it

[@jenswurm]

First story: If they can "pay it back within a year", then it should be easy to get a loan from a bank for it.

[@derekwhite1870]

Banks charge interests while family does not, mostly. They might be able to pay the sister in a year, which I doubt they would ever do, but not the bank.

[@alexisgrunden1556]

Banks have legal teams and binding contracts; family "loans" almost never do. Plus, there's the interest rates. Sis isn't planning on paying back jack sh*t; she just wants to parasitize OP because she _can_ afford her vile husband's surgery, but not without taking a lifestyle hit, which is the real issue here for the sister. She thinks that she can just bully her much younger sibling into giving it to her, rather than actually be _GASP!!!_ fiscally responsible and go without new designer bags and shoes for a year or two.

[@xenathornburg2416]

Exactly!

[@jenswurm]

@@derekwhite1870 true, there it may take a month longer. The bank would be happy to give such a loan though, it's not like OP is BIL's last hope to get that money.... Unless OPs sister is lying about being able to pay it back.

[@inigomontoya4109]

@@derekwhite1870 while true, if she can afford to pay back the principal to her sister in a year, then she can most definitely pay a bank a reasonable interest rate over a slightly longer term. But that's not really the problem, the problem is there is no way she is paying back jack shit. It will always be another guilt trip. O I can't pay this back ATM due to my husband having this issue, why are you asking for money right now when we are spending everything we have on husband's health, etc etc.

[@gaxalee7392]

The first story can be answered by rephrasing the question, “Am I the asshole for refusing to give up my college funds for the BIL that mocked my dying dad and not take me in after I was orphaned while my sister enabled it?”

[@thecomiccrafter3866]

Huh forgot about how they didnt let her move in

[@aninditachandrakirana7896]

Yeah, OP's not being cruel or selfish. The BIL just got a very well deserved karma.

[@aaasht2606]

Besides is she caves in it only proves to her older sister she can do that again and again to her while also treating her like poo.

[@jyotkabra3454]

I think she should have made them sign a contract for the money and if they were not able to pay her she could sell their luxuries for compensation. It would be an amazing turn of event if the sister did not pay

[@christian10697]

It is never OK to make fun of someone who's dying and make a scene at the funeral. The BIL is a total POS and he deserves his worsening health.

[@sarah.bea.]

About the meat story: I became a vegetarian when I was 15, too and the parents in this story sound way more accomodating than mine were for the first couple of years. Even if cleaning the freezer was the son‘s only option to make up for his action I believe it is fair. The animals now died in vain, he put financial strain on his family and poisoned the relationship with his parents. Granted, at 15 you might do stupid stuff like that rather than sit people down to talk but he still is the AH in this story.

[@VeggieGirl07]

Finally, a comment about this story that wasn't barraged with replies arguing about whether or not eating meat is moral

[@well....9621]

You sound like a good hearted person if you went vegetarian for the animals at such a young age

[@Chemical_candy]

Exactly I was thinking the exact same, the meat in that fridge wasn't farmed meat either and was being used to make the most of it so they only had to hunt once a year and he was put all of that to waste so those animals died for nothing. 😢

[@taxevader7777]

Not only did the animals die for no reason, but now the father has to hunt more animals or buy more meat, basically killing more animals than originally needed.

[@whatsomeonesaidwastaken9216]

the kid is an asshole, he should have to clean up the meat because if he doesnt respect other's beliefs why should we respect his?

[@Two-Man-Production]

The fact the mother in law expected her 4 months pregnant daughter in law to run around to treat her like royalty is shocking

[@xenathornburg2416]

It's not though, trust me, most in-laws are just straight from hell.

[@ngozijones5697]

@@xenathornburg2416 Yup, my ex MIL and FIL were atrocious. Never even felt comfortable sleeping their when we dated.

[@dimsufferer9951]

The “if I were his wife” comment makes me thing she (the MIL) resents OP for being in her son’s life at all

[@nationalinstituteofcheese3012]

Fun Fact: In my culture, when someone is hurt or sick, family members bring in food to help the family. My cousin brought food when my grandfather (who lives with us) had to go to the hospital. That’s the job of the family

[@derpypac-man2706]

I absolutely hate the phrase “life isn’t fair”. Yes, but we can always work to make it better.

[@northernalpine4350]

I heard a better variation of that phrase "life ain't fair but that doesn't exuse you" -My Grade 8 teacher

[@whatsomeonesaidwastaken9216]

SO TRUE

[@lahlybird895]

Same

[@gamingwithbryson2966]

Brotha spittin fax😎

[@oreoyin-yan8414]

Ugh, my dad uses this *ALL THE TIME*

[@kimhohlmayer7018]

In the last story the “do over” party is actually important. Daughter needs to learn that if plans go in the dumpster for any reason at all then it isn’t the end of the world. I was raised in a home with the attitude of “If it goes tits up, then it can never be fixed.” This messed me up for YEARS! Hope has great value and this is the time to teach a child that if a day goes to crap, it isn’t a big deal. We can try again another day.

[@Alphareon]

Last story: Things sometimes get ruined, but the father forgets that people sometimes gets excluded, and it's okay. Plus, the party got ruined by a parent decision, it's only fair that the parent in question tries to make ammends.

[@dianemartel5205]

Molly has cerebral palsy, which is NOT an excuse for appalling behaviour. I think it’s clear that her disability is NOT the reason why she’s having trouble making friends.

[@rogue9230]

@@dianemartel5205 I hate when people use their disabilities as excuses for their terrible behavior, but this time it isn't all her fault again development issues. Plus idk how anyone can find a Disney movie scary

[@stormwright8300]

@@rogue9230 I think Cruella is the live action movie, so it goes more into her backstory, which as far as I can tell, is a bit more gritty, as live actions can sometimes be.

[@hiftu]

@@rogue9230 First, she is a child. Second, it can be any irrational fear. Being irrational you can not reason about it.

[@velvety2006]

it's not even really a make-up party they are just gonna see a movie or is the dad implying since molly had been invited once she has to be invited to everything now.

[@Donnerwamp]

On the freezer story, I'd say forcing his son to interact with the dead animals that died for nothing because of him is more than fair. Those deer would have been eaten, their death wasn't for nothing. Now he has the guilt of wasting lives on his shoulders and making his family, well, not starve, but spend more money on food than necessary. From me that's a clear cut 1.5/5 for tormenting his family and an additional 3/5 AP for wasting meat and therefore animal lives, so in total a solid 4.5/5. If he were serious about his vegetarianism, he wouldn't have done this.

[@samhainnc9416]

My money is on the story being BS. I live in the south and after a hurricane my freezer held for over 24 hrs before only the top few things started to thaw. at that rate for it to become rancid would take over a week without anyone noticing it. I guess it is possible that no one needed anything from it for that long but seems more like someone just trying to make a story for attention.

[@Donnerwamp]

@@samhainnc9416 Yeah, tgat thought came to my mind as well, but I gave it the benefit of a doubt. I'm from Germany and we've had the circuit breaker for our chest freezer trip because of the lamp in the room and didn't notice for a week. After the week it was still below freezing in there, but to be fair, it was also winter and the room itself is at about fridge temperatures in winter.

[@daniellebleasdale7203]

@@samhainnc9416 in the original story on reddit it did say they only went in the freezer once a week to pull out meat to cook, he did it right after dad went in the freezer.

[@samhainnc9416]

@@daniellebleasdale7203 The food would be ruined, but rancid and rotting probably not. Maybe they were just exaggerating.

[@seto9897]

@@samhainnc9416 Looking at the date it was posted it's possible they lived in someplace the heatwave the USA was having.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

That first one....she married a chronically ill person with an illness that was already in full swing before the funeral, so the older sister is the worst for spending her inheritance frivolously rather than on her husband's illness and then guilting OP into giving up hers..... That is not a relationship worth saving.

[@JennyEverywhere]

Those mooching parents in law, complaining that the wife wasn't feeding her, are _NOT GUESTS!_ They are _family!_ If they demand guest-right, they are relinquishing clan-right, and that is a terminal insult. I would have pointed this out, and that if they want to continue mooching instead of helping, they need to rectify their behavior or leave...at which point I would deny them further access, as rude guests do not get welcomed back.

[@springmushroom9214]

Oh those in laws are not family they are Leeches especially the mother who directly in Insulted her for not putting up with her garbage instead of being a punching bag

[@shannonhoylegreen]

I wish I could say pointing that out to parents worked. We’ve done it with my step mom’s parents and it’s like it goes right over their heads

[@MrCrunchytime]

To a degree, guest right and clan right should go hand-in-hand. But in neither instance is one to tolerate disrespect; if they cannot respect the rules of your house, family or not, then they are not welcome in your home.

[@RiptoGakt]

My parents had put their collective feet down when we had to tend to my mom's late dad for each week a good eight years ago after he was showing signs of dementia (it was originally supposed to be ONLY for one day or until her little sister -- blame-dodging child-spoiling turd -- had gotten Opa's finances all sorted out, but it kept getting longer and longer to the point of it being four months; they had him at their place for the weekends). None of us were happy about it that time. It definitely felt like it was a mooching scenario the longer he stayed, and we've had more than plenty of frustrations (i.e. the dope losing a part of his electric shaver... while cleaning it out in, of all things, the green bin on the back porch. THAT was not fun at all). And I can still recall my mom just straight up leave the house if he ever hit me, even making it clear that he was a *guest* in our house. Even the days when my late grandfather (my dad's Dad; THE definition of a cool old guy!) had come over when he had dinner with us he was still being very respectful. Such as that one time where he came over to give me a hand with getting that ladder down (roof shingling I figured), which he judged would have been a disaster so he had me give him a hand in making sure it was tied down until it could be done later.

[@TheSwimmer522]

My mom did this. First though, let me mention that she was recovering from ankle surgery, but literally the day I got home from giving birth to my first born she demanded I make dinner. (I’m the chef in the family). Like wtf. I just pushed a baby out of me and you want me in the kitchen making you dinner???

[@moshigal156]

The issue with the meat story is that rotting meat is one of those smells that's VERY difficult to get rid of, and depending on how long the meat was left to rotting in there, the smell may very well have bled into the freezer walls leaving it to permanently smell like rotting meat and taint any future meat placed inside of it with the same smell. So even if the kid does clean it up, which I honestly think he should anyway because you can't really just throw out a freezer full of rotten meat, the freezer will more than likely need to be replaced anyway, which the kid should also be in charge of since it was his fault. Maybe this will teach him not to be wasteful and intentionally destroy food for the sake of a moral high ground.

[@MmeHyraelle]

Cue in : mythbuster episode where they let pigs rot in a car, deep clean it and resell. Everyone noticed the smell still.

[@Kreeos]

It's not even a moral high ground. It's just some smug teenager that thinks he knows better than his parents and is trying to force his views/lifestyle onto other. He has every right to be a vegetarian but has no right to force it onto others.

[@frodofranz]

@@Kreeos the parents were very accommodating and making Vegetarian nights for themselves as well, so it wasn't just the kid alone all the time. After this the kid should make his own dinners for a while as well, its a good skill to have.

[@abebuenodemesquita8111]

and he doesn't even really have the moral high ground. killing wild deer doesn't add greenhouse gasses in the same way that factory raised cows do.

[@Royalsprincess1]

@@Kreeos or to ruin other people's food because of his views. Especially his PARENTS! Who were STILL including him in all their meals! I mean, he has every right to feel this way but he didn't have any right to destroy their meats!

[@orenjitoburu474]

Sometimes I can hardly believe people like this exist

[@havenjoy6960]

Egg

[@Ak-js7lo]

Human beings are bastards were greedy we don’t deserve to be the top of the food chain look how we ruined the Planet some of us hate others due to sexuality,religion,race money,class choice of living etc

[@johndepalm6920]

Same here the audacity

[@SatBehindYouInHealth]

Monke

[@c.Orange]

@@Ak-js7lo what do you think the food chain is? Some animals literally eat their own species' babies (as well), to stay on top of the food chain and have less competition and I'd reckon that is way more horrible than anything in this video. Food chain isn't about deserving, it's about being up here and when did we have a choise to be up here anyways? We came up here because of our ancestor's breeding habits and uga buga club go smash, after that all escalated and now we are here, finally starting to figure out this shit. we started fucking the planet far before we even knew what we were doing and were now putting effort into atleast trying to do something about it instead of what weve done before.

[@meaningmeadow]

As someone with cerebral palsy minus the development disorders, I think that when you have a child with a disability it's your responsibility to make sure that they're aware of what to expect. Especially in a case like Molly's where the child is prone to meltdowns. I don't think it was a good idea to have Molly go to the party alone. It was a wonderful thing for OP's kid to even agree to invite Molly, but Molly's mom should've said, "Hey this is the first time she's done this, so is it okay if I tag along?" If Molly's mom was there she would be much more prepared to handle Molly's meltdown and comfort her during the movie and could've stopped her bad behavior at OP's house. Would it have made her stand out more? Yes, but her behavior in and of itself made her stand out and I'd be willing to bet none of those other girls ever want to see her again, which might have been avoided if her mom was there to help out.

[@heathertulip2389]

Exactly. Molly also got the shitty end of the stick here. So did OP and the kids. The stick is a branch and it is covered in shit. Every end is shitty. It sounds like this mom did the best she could with the knowledge she had at the time to be accommodating. This just maybe wasn’t the right event for Molly, too. Maybe her mom could’ve accompanied her to the party and they could’ve skipped the movie, or seen a different one. There were a lot of better ways to handle this, but none of it is OP’s fault, the daughter’s fault, Molly’s fault, or the friends’ fault. I just hope OP talks to the kids about what happened, and nips any potential ableism from the negative experience in the bud. It’s not like Molly was likely *trying* to ruin the party, after all. She was just there to have fun like everyone else, but she didn’t understand the social rules or wasn’t able to regulate her emotions (pizza and cake) and got really overwhelmed (movie).

[@daniella9787]

The vegetarian teenager is the type of vegetarian who give veganism or vegatarians a bad name. Be respectfull! Don't force people like that and don't expect no punishment 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@Dogspine1]

Exactly lol. Like ok yeah killing an animal for food isn't Exactly moral when you could eat alternatives but killing an animal for nothing is even worse

[@ramenbomberdeluxe4958]

@@Dogspine1 No, stop it, there is NOTHING amoral about killing an animal for food. We are designed to have the capacity for eating meat, and animals hunt all the time, why do we have to get singled out as these evil monsters for doing a natural thing? Hell, there are some cultures SO CONSIDERATE of the animals they hunt that they go out of their way to thank the departed animal. I'm tired of this passive aggressive narrative that we meat eaters are these amoral monsters who "don't wanna listen to science be heeeealllthyyyyyyyyy :(". This is worse than a stereotypical screechy vegan/vegetarian, this is insidious and smug, and very hard to call out because its not deliberately loud and obnoxious. Also, before you say it, I know about SOME amoral meat factories, that's not the argument. The fact is, historically, we've always hunted as normal, and the only time the argument of amoral meat production comes up is when we reached the industrial era and onward. Hunting is natural, eating meat is okay, stop shaming us for doing literally nothing wrong.

[@askerleaves1614]

@@ramenbomberdeluxe4958 well said

[@askerleaves1614]

Those type of vegetarians are the same type of people who put their dogs on a vegan diet

[@GeorgeVCohea-dw7ou]

@@askerleaves1614 And then, wonder why their dog won't eat...

[@lluma8153]

To be honest the son in the freezer story seems like the type of person to make their dog only eat fresh vegetables

[@animeotaku307]

Poor dog… Pro-tip: if you want a vegan pet, get a rabbit or a Guinea pig.

[@morgandouglas6014]

We all know the sister would have pocketed whatever money did not get spent on the surgery. OP was in the right here. The sister and her hubby were jerks to OP anyway, and if they needed OP to help cover the husband‘s medical bills, they should’ve thought of that before the husband went and insulted OP’s dad.

[@Spartan3D213]

Never give your treasures to dogs or swine.

[@velvety2006]

it's the risk of having a partner with a chronic illness, she could have spend less and kept a nest egg in case he needed an operation at some point. instead, she spent it on luxuries.

[@radarw64]

It does not matter how much or how little money you have, as long as it all goes to the doctors.

[@ChronoCritic]

The BIL was mocking OP's dad for his health issues while being chronically ill, I call this (his inability to squeeze sympathy from OP) absolute karma.

[@ernestlemmingway1124]

Second story: That son is an all-too-typical example of what happens when someone takes up vegetarianism because of a sense of self-righteousness. And it's not an age thing, either. A story I have that could fit into the reddit is about a "vegan" Karen who came into the lab for a nutrition panel, got the (very bad) news about her cholesterol/sodium/triglycerides (she wasn't eating actual vegetables), and attacked the receptionists with a terminal monitor she grabbed and tore the cables out of in her blind rage. I can't say more because her trial is set to start on Wednesday.

[@bostonrailfan2427]

please post this story on Reddit, this is awesome and needs telling! perhaps after the trial ends?

[@scheneli000]

Mayhaps the trial is over now?

[@raw.potato]

Why is it that every toxic relative who normally does not want anything to do with you or the one who has no problem bullying and abusing you persistently for years on end all of a sudden pulls out a family card when THEY need money when you sure as hell know they wouldn't come through if you needed help 🤦‍♀️

[@hiftu]

You just described narcissistic people being themselves.

[@nicholasfarrell5981]

Because (and I speak from personal experience here) they're worthless parasites who don't care about anyone other than themselves.

[@Richard_Nickerson]

Narcissism

[@uneducatedtrashrat8180]

Because as soon as they see an opportunity for them to gain something, they swoop in like a hawk. But the moment something or someone stands in the way they have a complete meltdown over the smallest things. They know what they're doing is shitty and don't want to deal with it themselves, so they leave you in the dust.

[@xenathornburg2416]

I be going similar shit in my life 24/7, let me tell you, it's living hell, and you may sadly know that already. People are just messed up.

[@kylovesart]

I definitely disagree with the "tough love" approach to The last story. There's nothing wrong with the makeup birthday party. Like rSlash said, they didn't get to see a movie they all want to see and Molly doesn't so it's not like they're cutting her out. Also while it's true that things don't always go as planned, it's also true that sometimes when things don't go as planned you make it up another time. Ever had a party ruined and decided to just a host another one later? I'm sure a lot of people have. A date is interrupted because of an emergency? You rescheduled the date to try again another time. A picnic is cut short because it rains? You reschedule the picnic for another day when it's going to be sunny. Yes part of life is accepting that sometimes things don't go your way and plants might be ruined, but part of mature adult life is adapting and changing to what happens and not getting downtrodden just because things don't happen exactly the way you want them to. Sometimes one of the best things you can do not only for yourself but your guests is accept things as they happen in reschedule so that everyone can still have the experience they looked forward to

[@abrahamthebewildered1448]

It also didn't "Just happen." It's not some random event like a water pipe bursting. The parent indirectly caused it by having her daughter invite Molly. If there was a lesson to be taught, the daughter already learned it on her birthday, but also, not EVERYTHING needs to be a lesson. The make-up party is a very nice gesture IMO; and I give the dad 1/5 A-holes for trying to sabotage his wife's efforts to make their daughter happy. Note that the daughter doesn't sound spoiled in the lest, so why not give her a nicer memory?

[@kylovesart]

@@abrahamthebewildered1448 exactly. Also if he's concerned about sending the message of not including people then she can always have a conversation to acompany it. Like saying that you should always make your best attempts to include everyone but that doesn't mean that you can't do stuff without them. Or obviously something far more nuanced than what I just said. But basically make a point of saying the important thing is is that she includes Molly on her birthday and still getting to see black widow later.

[@velvety2006]

@@abrahamthebewildered1448 I don't the dad. molly was included, yea the party did not go the way it was supposed to be partly because of her but none could predict that would happen and it did not seem that the daughter was putting the blame on molly. It's not like that the daughter cussed out molly and that op then decided to do the movie to make her feel better.

[@shaynamalkah1409]

@@abrahamthebewildered1448 I’d give the dad 3/5 buttholes for being ableist and babying Molly. I’m autistic, and babying disabled people when they act out is almost as ableist as bullying them. Disabled people are just that; people. We all learn to not do things by having consequences to our actions. By babying disabled people, you’re basically calling them too stupid to learn right from wrong, which 9/10 is not even remotely the case. You still need to punish bad behavior when a disabled person does something wrong. Obviously not cruely, but you still need to do so. I don’t think she should be punished for the panic attack, but throwing someone else’s property in an angry tantrum should DEFINITELY be punished. Molly’s what, 13-15? That’s old enough to not act like a spoiled 5 year old. The mom should make molly apologize, in my opinion.

[@SheerLunaSea]

@@shaynamalkah1409 as a fellow autistic person (among other things), I second this. Having symptoms is one thing, using them as an excuse to destroy and hurt is a completely different thing. A lot of neuro-divergent communities agree on this sentiment.

[@LunetteFox]

Moral of the first story: If you have a chronic illness don't be an asshole to someone who can potentially pay for or help you with treatment.

[@KajiXD]

AHs will be AHs

[@dracko158]

"But most of them cut my sister and her husband off." Oh golly gee, I WONDER WHY.

[@joshijoshi6308]

My neighbors' teenage son became vegan last year at the behest of his new girlfriend. His dad aims for 2 deer and a wild hog every year to fill their freezer for the year. Son did something similar recently. His parents not only made him clean up the mess and purchase a new freezer, they also made him turn over part of his paycheck for their (new) weekly meat purchases until dad can replenish the freezer. And there went his new car.

[@danielm.595]

Ok, one is alright, two is a coincidence, but if there's a third one I will start to think that this is some sort of internet challenge

[@dr.health1688]

@@danielm.595. I mean, it’s a pretty common thing. Vegans and vegetarians like any other group have the stupid activist ones, you know like the vegan teacher. You’d be surprised at how common it is for a vegan or vegetarian to just up and ruin meat like that simply because it’s meat.

[@radhiadeedou8286]

Maybe it's the same family

[@vulpixle9659]

@@dr.health1688 don’t forget PETA

[@tiredman99]

@@vulpixle9659 PETA is a joke. They kill more animals than they save

[@sasukuto]

Yeah, the 15 year old who unplugged the freezer either A. Needs to clean up to meet, or B he should have to buy you a new freezer AND pay for all the meet he wasted.

[@ReigoVassal]

The first one is definitely better. It teach "not everything could be bought with money" and "money aren't 'get out of jail free' card" (well unfortunately it is, you just need to find who's the corrupt one).

[@PotterBrony82]

Nah, screw that. That meat has now gone to waste, which means whatever deer died it was for absolutely nothing. OP needs to make sure his son wraps his head around that thought. Also the fact that now more deer were gonna die. His son accomplished nothing at all, because I guarantee OP still isn’t a vegetarian now. And yeah, throughly clean it or buy a new one. His choice

[@danielm.595]

And considering how much time has passed since they opened this deep freezer before the incident, I think that it would be easier to buy a new freezer, since the smell would already be impregnated in every part of the freezer, not just the storage area.

[@PotterBrony82]

@@danielm.595 yeah, probably would be not just easier but better off getting a new one considering that. Also that kid is lucky OP isn’t like my dad. If I pulled something like that, not only would I be force to dispose of the rotten meat, either clean or replace it myself, but also personally replace the meat. Which would mean shooting however many deer would be needed to replace it, and clean/butcher it all myself.

[@ashleyd7023]

‘No you can’t live with us after dad died, but we want your inheritance money because I already blew through mine on stuff that’s not necessary.’ We can’t help you, but you have to help us. Also, she’s so young compared to her older sister…her older sister knows what she’s doing to her. I hope she doesn’t give her sister her inheritance.

[@limiv5272]

The younger sister might be an oopsie baby

[@crunchypancakes5684]

I’m confused about the vegetarian story lol like he unplugged the freezer so he just wasted meat and caused more animals to be bought at a slaughterhouse (way worse then hunting) and making more animals die while the animals that were already killed were wasted and died for no cause

[@Yumi_Jay]

He probably was trying to force them to not consume meat which you can't force people to eat a particular way.

[@arabesquewhyisthistakennow]

it seemed that he's a teenager who couldnt comprehend causalities and how the world works..like i was, being cooped up in my own view and prejudice..it took me a slap in my right cheek to realize i was wrong

[@AzureKyle]

He did it to try and force his family into veganism

[@nna_]

seems like he didn't actually cares about the animals and just wanna force his lifestyle to other people.

[@Annie_Annie__]

Teens as a group are notorious for not being able to think ahead to predict the consequences of their actions. He saw this working out so that his parents would have to eat what he eats and after a week or two they’d become vegan or vegetarian too. He couldn’t step outside himself long enough or think ahead far enough to consider literally any other possibility. That includes not being able to think of the animals that already died. Yet I’m sure that 99.8% of the vegans/vegetarians watching this video (myself included), the first thing we thought of was "great, now those deer died for no reason, ya genius! That’s even worse!"

[@josephmorgan3058]

No host duties apply; they aren't your guests if they weren't invited!

[@jeffr5552]

Send the sister a picture of the new cars and say "this is what you refuse to give up instead of taking care of your own family."

[@BlogingLP]

Based

[@catmanchester3847]

I’m a vegan and have been for 8 years. I definitely agree that the son should have to either clean the freezer or buy a new one. It’s important to be respectful of other peoples dietary choices, especially if they’re being respectful of his.

[@maxime2428]

The kid just sounds so entitled forcing his own beliefs on other people, but hate if anyone does that to him 4:23

[@ilyte1]

Exactly he had an issue with people forcing their beliefs on him which isn't true they were just trying to get him to clean up a mess. But he had no issue forcing his beliefs on to other people

[@_amongthe_stars]

While I completely agree with you we also have to keep in mind that he is 15 and probably misinformed He was completely in the wrong and this is an opportunity for a lesson not a lecture. That's my opinion tho

[@ilyte1]

@@_amongthe_stars I just hope he's receptive to the lesson you can't learn anything if you're not

[@_amongthe_stars]

@@ilyte1 Fair, I have a brother who’s kinda like that lol

[@limiv5272]

I don't think anyone was forcing beliefs on the kid, just making him face the consequences of his actions like good parents. He was certainly trying to force his beliefs on his family

[@tdannyV2]

In the molly story the dad is missing that without the makeup party, his daughter will connect people who are like molly or just different, with having things ruined, which could easily become a seed of hate, our first encounters with things, especially as kids, has such a huge impact on how we view that thing^^'

[@pandoratheclay]

Story 1: Sister used her part of the inheritance, gets mad that she can’t use the other part that belongs to someone else. What a waste of a hissyfit. 3+/5 for the audacity, + is for the potential that she didn’t ask nicely or just plain decided to harass people because she was obsessed with fancy schmancy cars.

[@pandoratheclay]

Story 2: The son decided to pull the plug on your meat storage because he thought you weren’t supporting him enough by letting him eat the vegetarian way he decided to go. Well that’s .5 for the fact that you let food go to waste. So 2.5/5 at worst because all he did was waste some food and disrespected everyone else that just so happens to be okay with eating meat. (2 for the disrespect and .5 for wasting food like an idiot) Not that bad but really should have thought of a better way that had less chances to backfire.

[@pandoratheclay]

Follow on story 2. I might also be in that age range but when I do something petty,it’s actually petty like hiding someone’s things in their messy room Or changing the background of their phone to have text reminding them that welding without a welding mask for everyone interacting with that area is kinda illegal or casually saying that it’s 2021 and safety precautions are a thing now.

[@pandoratheclay]

Small thing about story 3. When I make food I say it’s in the kitchen because I’m not a server/waiter and if they are too lazy to pick it up then they’ll have to pick it up and put it in the microwave to warm it up. My parents don’t seem to get the message but I guess they’ll have to wait some more.

[@aaasht2606]

@@pandoratheclay and theres people who cant get a scap of food. Smh. Kid didnt feel hunger before??

[@tastybacon255-baconboy5]

@@pandoratheclay makes sense to me. You did all the cooking, you shouldn't have to go thru the extra effort to carry another plate to them

[@dmcken4671]

I always hated the idea of forcing children to invite someone to their party.

[@lilwizerd9537]

I audibly gasped when OP said she was 4 months pregnant. Holy crap

[@limiv5272]

The MIL would've been wrong with or without the pregnancy

[@NEPAAlchey]

Seems like a pretty bad idea to let Molly go to a new person's house unattended in general.

[@kheldaur2107]

yeah, she shouldn´t be around people at all

[@maxime2428]

My sister is a vegetarian and has no problem with cleaning the dishes that has meat on it, plus for us we seem her eat no meat and that kind of made us rethink home much meat we ate and decided to reduce our consumption, however the kid expecting others change there diet immediately instead of gradually may have the opposite effect of encouraging others to eat less meat.

[@SeraliaAerials]

Plus hunting deer is a pretty important thing in the US nowadays. The natural predators population has been reduced so much that without hunters, the deer population would be out of control. If I remember right some parts of the US are having to bring in Canadian wolves to deal with deer populations in areas where hunting isn’t allowed. It’s not like they’re getting the meat from a farm, where the deer would be fed certain foods and treated certain ways to try and make the meat taste better, this is a wild deer that has had a long life of running scared through the woods and has potential to become a pest animal or severely injure someone, whether that be from just getting too close to humans and lashing out in fear, or wandering across a road at night and sending a family to an early grave. Someone has to keep the balance, even if the vegan extremists don’t agree with the methods and would rather punish the livestock population just to prove a point

[@toysruskid5074]

We have locals who only eat deer meat from deer hit by cars... and on some roads they stay well fed....

[@littlekuribohimposte]

@@SeraliaAerials And that isn't a fix because all the ranchers have the mentality of "We killed all the wolves once, don't think we won't do it again,"

[@SeraliaAerials]

@@littlekuribohimposte that is true, but all we can do is what we can do, right? We’ll do what we can to keep the balance of life in check.

[@gothicgolem2947]

@@SeraliaAerials you see hears the bit I disagree with what you said for food is fine but population control? No way cause look at the human population we don’t do that to people even tho our population has grown rapidly so why do it to deers? I’m glad some states don’t allow deer hunting and are brining in natural predators that is great news

[@gabbywatermeilon218]

lowkey keep refreshing the page for rslash's vid today

[@albertzsteinbock6935]

The first story: Rather than paying her sister to maybe safe a life, become a good doctor with that money and safe way more lifes.

[@s4dg]

I feel like the mom in the last story kinda owes the daughter a second birthday. She was trying to encourage her to be nice, but it didn’t work out and she is kinda to blame. She isn’t the asshole it was just an accident, but the only way this won’t teach her to exclude people is to make it up to her.

[@Gashnaw]

Don;t look at Black widow as a "Second birthday" You are just taking them out to eat some pizza and watch a movie. My mom did that all the time (And sometimes it was someone else's parents.)

[@l.tc.5032]

Yeah that was a staple for me growing up. In fact I'm pretty sure that's how I spent every weekend while I was in middle school.

[@blazilfrazil2]

Never give your inheritance money away to anyone blaming you for their problems

[@MyLittlePonyTheater]

The freezer story: The moral, financial, ethical and environmental dilemma of eating meat centers around the breeding and killing of animals en masse in horrible conditions. When you waste or ruin meat owned by someone who eats it, you aren't saving animals. All you're doing is making that family purchase or acquire meat again sooner. Thus, the factory farms that produce the meat get more money. They breed and slaughter more animals. Hunters hunt more game if they're able. Fishermen fish more. This results in more death than would have occurred if you didn't commit the frozen meat to waste. The kid isn't a vegetarian/vegan because he believes in the cause, he just wants to feel like he's better than everyone else. It's disgusting. He needs to be taught these things.

[@well....9621]

I feel like he's young and has that youth arrogance. And yes he needs to be taught these things in a way he'll get it.

[@wannabehistorian371]

Augh the story makes me cringe so much. I hope the kid grows up or the ghosts of those deer haunt him for the next few years. How wasteful, what’s even the logic here? Though these are most likely common North American Red Deer, which are incredibly common almost everywhere they exist and in fact are damaging many ecosystems by overgrazing, so fortunately going to hunt more of them isn’t going to harm more than the individual animals themselves.

[@bostonrailfan2427]

that fact doesn’t matter to militant vegetarians and vegans: they see only “meat is bad” and don’t give a damn about the consequences

[@well....9621]

@@bostonrailfan2427 ​ @Boston Railfan Yup, that's the problem with militant anything, they don't look at the big picture. I'm vegan. Do I sometimes feel like screaming "JUST STOP!!" Sure. But that just turns people away and shuts them down. If I live my life and answer questions openly, I can influence people. Veganism is a very unique thing. You ask anyone if it's OK to beat their wives or abuse children they'll say no. For us the fear and horror of what nonhumans go through is comparable. (I know that will flip some people out but we believe in protecting any sentient being that can't protect themselves) So I do understand why vegans want to get militant but they don't understand that it DOESN'T help animals.

[@stephanieramirez15]

Every time the MIL called herself a “guest” I would of said “guest are people who are INVITED…. No one invited you!” Period point blank bye!

[@Idontknowwhyidothisanymore]

Thank you for being consistent Rslash, I've been going through a major breakup with a fiance I thought I would be my forever. It's really nice to have a distraction every day, and have a nice way to start my morning

[@tastybacon255-baconboy5]

You'll get through it. It may not be today, tomorrow, maybe not even this year, but eventually you *WILL* be able move on and be able to live your life without thinking about them.

[@xyblitz.]

It's alright, stay happy =)

[@Idontknowwhyidothisanymore]

Thank you all 🥺 we have a pretty great community

[@tastybacon255-baconboy5]

@@Idontknowwhyidothisanymore of course! The community is one of the best parts of this channel!

[@365ral]

As a former special-needs kid, it's infuriating that Molly's mom didn't warn OP about how to treat Molly when she has her outbursts! She probably could've had a better chance of consoling her if she knew how to handle certain situations with her. Instead, all the other kids might think Molly's just being entitled or seeking attention, not that she has special needs!

[@kylovesart]

Great point!! The entire point of making accommodations for someone is that you know what accommodations they need before hand. I still don't think that the mom necessarily warranted a butthole reading because apparently she thought that Molly was doing better so it may have been a little bit of wishful thinking on her part but if OP new beforehand maybe she could have had some discussions with Molly like the movie might be a little scary " let's plan how you want to do the scary parts. As a rule the birthday girl gets the first slice in our house maybe you can have the second one. Before we order and eat is there anything you need?"

[@vulpixle9659]

Or go with molly to the movie to help OP out with molly

[@365ral]

@@kylovesart I'm on the autism spectrum, and, as a kid, there were many times when people viewed my awkward behavior or lack of social skills as being weird, rude, or naughty. I would genuinely not understand something, or be more easily upset by something, and some teachers would just yell at me or punish me as if I was a bad kid. Molly's mom might have had good intentions, but not informing others about how to treat her can easily make people assume she's just a spoiled brat or seeking attention. It's especially important for kids just hitting puberty, and will be more insecure and self-conscious about themselves than ever. I'd hate for her to ever go through the kind of bullying and abuse I faced as a kid.

[@365ral]

@@vulpixle9659 IDK. Having a fully-grown adult stranger randomly approach a 12 y/o girl with special needs ever leaves a good impression. I could be treated as more of a predator or trafficker than someone trying to help.

[@vulpixle9659]

@@365ral no I mean Molly’s mom go to the movies with OP to help her daughter molly when she gets overstimulated because most likely she would know how to help her daughter

[@bi-product]

Oh, thank God. I needed my daily dose of rslash.

[@dominickwolf9689]

Shut up

[@aeonvalley8589]

@@dominickwolf9689 you stfu bro why’d you feel the need to comment this

[@aeonvalley8589]

It’s nightly for me lmao

[@gweenbeanman7365]

same

[@gweenbeanman7365]

@@dominickwolf9689 what do you get from this?

[@Juju2927]

The reaal problem in the 4th story is that Molly was left unsupervised. Special need kids without a parent should have at least an aid whenever they participate in an event. Imagine if they were going in an amusement park and there was nobody to look after her because the other kids were already much to handle ? So yeah, maybe 0.5 points to Molly's mother to not have done some arrangement to have someone look up after Molly.

[@barbaraday7662]

You’re right. It takes work and understanding in order to manage outbursts and behavioral issues. This is a whole new setting with a lot of stressors with people that didn’t know how to handle it.

[@songbird-wj4yj]

I actually have an example about this: Our dance studio had a yearly lock in (basically a huge supervised sleepover in the dance studio) One girl in our dance studio had Down syndrome and she came every year. She was able to because her mom was always one of the chaperones. This meant everyone was able to have fun and her mother was there to help her if she got upset or reign her in if she got too rough or rowdy with the other kids. As you can imagine, a sleepover with a dance studio full of girls can be overwhelming at times, but she was able to participate and have fun because her mother was there to help when needed. I do think Molly’s mother should have realized her limits and planned accordingly instead of just thrusting her into that situation.

[@katestarnes1709]

I think you’re completely right. Molly’s mom definitely wasn’t malicious, but she should’ve known better in this situation. Molly deserved support in such an unfamiliar and overwhelming situation

[@N0xiety]

Also, most people are especially tolerant to bad behavior of special needs kids and try to be extra nice to them, even when the kids actions are not something they would normally tolerate if it was their own kid. Since they are not the parent of the special needs kid and don't really know how to handle the kids special case, unrelated people are simply scared of interfering with the kid and triggering something even worse, which doesn't really help tbh.

[@primrosevale1995]

This right here.

[@fawnahearts]

My first reaction to the son unplugging that freezer would have def made me the asshole. That meat has to be replaced and it wasn't bought, it was hunted. A trip is in order.

[@dr.health1688]

For story two id make him clean up the mess in it’s entirety, which means cleaning up the meat and clean/sanitize the freezer and if he can’t clean the freezer to buy a new one. Don’t give him a choice between the two, make him do both. Just because he’s a Vegetarian doesn’t give Him the excuse to not clean up his meat mess. Also, if possible consider making him pay for the meat that you’d use to replace it all, if he can’t afford it straight up tell him it would be done in payments until paid. I’d also sit him down with anyone else who lives in the family and fully tell him what he did wrong. Why it was wrong, and why he received the punishment he got.

[@DakotaAbroad]

I've been a vegan for 15 years. No problem making that kid clean that freezer. He made his bed he has to lie in it. Especially when he has a choice to just replace it (which is so wasteful). I agree with the vegetarian who commented. What a fucking waste in every way.

[@N0xiety]

I mean, good luck getting out 1 week old rotting meat smell out of that freezer. With the excess water and humidity inside, it must have gotten bad. Had some mold problem in my fridge when it broke, and we were away at vacation in summer when it happened. There was no meat left in as we took whatever we can from the fridge before going, but apparently what we left behind was enough to grow a bit of mold because of how humid it got inside the fridge. You can imagine the situation as it stayed like that 5 days marinating in summer heat. Even after cleaning properly, to this day if i leave something without proper cover in the fridge it gets this slight bad smell/taste. There is no mold, and you can't really smell something bad when you actively try to, but the bad smell still somehow just seeps into everything that isn't properly covered up if you leave it in the fridge for some time, which affects the taste.

[@strawberrilemnade9530]

Soggy, rotten, week old summer heat smell. No thanks.

[@NecroFlex]

The sick husband story, the FIL probably took the best route to avoid both anger from his wife and OP, he probably knew OP was in the right, but didn't want to have his wife be angry with him.

[@limiv5272]

Was anyone blaming the FIL?

[@drybowserman1670]

It’s funny how most people see these in the morning, but they pop up for me before I go to bed.

[@jamespond300]

Half 2 for me

[@NotUnique_]

It pops up at 4pm when I go to work lol

[@maximep1874]

yeah lol

[@irdmoose]

For Molly's birthday party: It's important to know that sometimes things out of your control can ruin situations. However, it's also important to see that when you can make things right, or at least better, you should. OP suggested inviting Molly, not the daughter. I think doing a makeup event, if it's within budget, etc. would be making things right. Nobody had any idea that things would turn out that way, and crap happens. This is a valuable time to teach the lesson that crap happens and you do what you can to make things as right as they can be.

[@wajdiayoub4748]

Don't forget that if SOMEONE is a vegan, that's fine. It's his or her life choice. But same with meat eaters it's our choice to eat meat. You can't push your preferences or lifestyle choices down someone else's throat. This goes for anyone not just meat eaters and vegans.

[@jonathanhowells7864]

Learn to coexist not convert

[@wajdiayoub4748]

@@jonathanhowells7864 Exactly. Wouldn't that make life 100x easier if people could learn this with religion especially?

[@threecards333]

@Chris G The nation of India would love to chat with you. Seriously, something like 40% of Indians are vegetarians, one of my coworkers is from India and his is a vegetarian. He is not vegan as he likes his milk, paneer, and curd (yogurt). Meat is not necessary, but historically most regions did not have the variety of plants/crops for a vegetarian diet so meat was needed as part of the weekly diet and even so it was not part of a daily diet.

[@raniasafira3608]

@Chris G plant base protein and fat do exist, there's a lot of high source of protein that is vegan, tempeh and tofu for example, and fat? Coconut oil, avocado oil, vegetables oil, basically anykind of oil = fat

[@ManlyStump]

In the second story, OP said he told the kid to clear up the rotten meat "and either" sanitise the freezer or buy a new one, so he didn't actually give his son the option to not interact with meat. Having said that, I completely disagree the son should be given that option. If he doesn't want to interact with meat, he shouldn't have touched the freezer in the first place!

[@Hybrid301]

The serving of coffee and croissants to ungrateful guest gives me strong French vibes.

[@DetectiveCheese]

During the entire first story I kept thinking "THEN SELL THE CARS!" untill it got brought up in the story itself.

[@unknown_wonder]

The first story, op sister was trying to manipulate her.. Op should pay attention to the red flags, op sister should sell all the stuff they wasted on cars and other stuff..

[@thedevilsadvocate788]

Mother-In-Law story: I once had my roommate's family coming over for weeks to help take care of her, because I was working and I couldn't be around at all time to watch over her. I often came home to them making themselves very comfortable in the living room, playing with my video games, eating food on the couch I paid for (which has never been allowed), emptying my fridge to the point where there was literally nothing for me to eat. I even caught them sleeping in my room and using my computer. I had enough and I told them to leave. They start fighting me over it, claiming that since my roommate pays half the rent, she's allowed to have people over as long as she wants, to which I replied that it matters little to me. They complained to my roommate, but she agreed. I then proceed to tell them "As of now, you are all trespassing, and we have two options; you leave on your own or I'll have police take you out." They tried to resist, even fought me for my phone when I started calling, not knowing I already called the police. They were pretty smug until they saw red and blue lights outside. I told my roommate that I care for her deeply, but I will not allow her family under our roof ever again. I also took a few days off work to care for her. We are still roommates and good friends to this day.

[@callmeros1356]

Sister:makes dumb desigens* Brother:does nothing* Sister:well im waiting for your money

[@sirresigmenduken5033]

Desigens? You mean decisions?

[@barryallen2240]

Also I think they're both female

[@iPLAYtheSTATION]

"Most of her family members have cut her off" Gee, I wonder why...

[@maxterdelta2220]

In the molly situation the partner is the asshole, in rslash measurement he would be like 1.5/5 buttholes, yeah sometimes in life things get ruined, but it was the parents decision to include molly to the party no the kids, is not the kids fault, and one of the parents is planing to make it up you just dont try to deny your child happines and go against your partners wishes to make your child happy in a reasonable way.

[@iamtheonewhotalksbutyoucan5781]

I disagree. It wasn't like she was throwing a huge party for her daughter and excluding molly she was taking her daughter to see black widow which at times could be scary for a child so she probably wouldn't like it and something to eat.

[@PseudoUematsu]

Agreed. There are plenty of ways to teach your kids that life isn’t fair sometimes, you don’t need to stop giving your kids gifts for it.

[@radhiadeedou8286]

Nah he has a good point, the kid is 12 years old so she can understand that sometimes things are ruined and you don't get a redo in life, and it doesn't matter if it's anyone's fault. I would agree with you if she was 4 or 5 but at her age it's a good lesson that sometimes life is unfair and no one will make it right

[@Lemon-jh7gu]

@@radhiadeedou8286 She can understand that soon enough but trying to turn a special day for your 12 yo daughter into that lesson is horrible

[@GamerSapss]

Yeah, if the argument was "hey, we don't have much money to do this" then I could get it, but his premise is faulty. If I wanted to have a videogame party, my parents wanted to invite the new kid bob in town, and then it turns out that bob hates the games I want to play, throws a massive tantrum, ruining it for everyone, and maybe throws the remote at the TV or something lie that, it's then not really right to say "hey, you can have another party next week, but not one that doesn't include bob" In that case, bob's presence alone, especially in that short of a timeperiod, would sour the mood, not necessarily because of their conditions, but because of the actions that goes directly against what the person the party is for. I've had friends who actually got so mad when they lost the game that they threw it at the tv, and I sent them home because of that. Closing thoughts, when you invite someone with pre-existing conditions like these, the party should in the first place be in such a way that they can participate, the fact that molly's mom thought she would be fine for this party since she had been improving is fine, but she should have said something 0.1/5, not malicious, just forgetful. Mom and daughter are not in the wrong 0/5, father means well, but comes at it from the wrong point of view, 1/5

[@Gripprear69]

Last story: what i think they should have done at party, is to bring the special needs kids mom. So she can take care of her and help her when it gets too much. And if for some reason the mother cant come. Then tell her what op should when she gets over stimulated, bring something comforting, have her own special corner when it gets to much.

[@leilanigoodman3536]

I was listening to some of your older videos and the sound quality is actually much better! Keep it up, you're doing great!

[@Swnsasy]

First story.. The aunt said that OP needed to brace for the damage that would be caused to her relationship with her sister if she didn't give her the money.. With that logic, would she tell the sister ASKING for the money to brace for the destruction of her relationship with her sister if she didn't PAYBACK the money?? To anyone thinking the sister with the money is heartless, HER SISTER KNEW HER HUSBAND was sick yet blew her money and now you're saying the only person that is supposed to benefit is the sister that blew her money!! Wtf?!?

[@aeonvalley8589]

Daily reminder to always be positive when ever you can, even if it isn’t all or even a lot of the time

[@NotoriousFisher]

As someone who hunts as has no venison in my freezer that second story make me so depressed. Alexa play taps

[@jbwkz0ted]

But is it even fair that OP had to take care of Molly without any supervision from someone who have a better understanding about Molly's problem? I mean she's welcomed to the party but making OP had to deal with Molly without any help from Molly's mother is just not fair. Molly's mother just basically left her daughter with a disability to someone who had zero idea on what and how to take care of her that lead to OP's daughter birthday party ruined. I might be wrong for thinking this way but I disagree with RSlash this time. I give Molly's mother 1 to 1.5/5 butthole

[@AndSoWeLaughed]

No. Her mother wouldn’t have allowed her to go without supervision if she needed it? “Deal with Molly” sounds very ableist. Molly has to learn to be without her mother and people have to learn how to include Molly and be empathetic. If she was getting better from therapy and had less outburst, Molly’s mum is trusting a parent who invited Molly knowing she had difficulties. Maybe not specific sensory difficulties but she understood she was disabled. No-one MADE the birthday mum DEAL with Molly. She could’ve also asked if there was anything that would’ve made Molly’s stay a little easier considering her cerebral palsy. If Molly needed 24/7 care, she wouldn’t have gone to the party alone.

[@limiv5272]

It sounded like the mother was very surprised Molly behaved the way she did, she stated that Molly had been doing really well lately. It might be that she simply made an honest error in judgement, thinking her daughter was doing better than she really was. I don't think a little mistake, that ultimately caused no real harm [A ruined party sucks but it's not such a big deal in the grand scheme of things], deserves a butthole score.

[@pooydragon5398]

​@@AndSoWeLaughed Saying that the disabled person is inconveniencing you is not ableist. Although I do agree with the overall sentiment. Maybe she is doing better than before, but it's still difficult for a completely new person. So I don't think mom deserves a butthole rating

[@AndSoWeLaughed]

@@pooydragon5398 Edit: I was also referencing the exact words used. You deal with a dog or a problem. Not a person. It is when she knew she was disabled and invited her anyway. The inconvenience to her was her disability, and she thought she'd be like the other kids. I'd give OP 1 rating because she didn't ask, but then I guess I'd also give the other mother 1 because she didn't tell her. Molly needs to be in these environments for her to grow as a person, but I agree with R/ in that she's just taking the other kids to see a movie Molly didn't want to. But the dad is right in this situation, life happens. Learn and grow. I think it's also weird that people are using the word 'suffer' and 'ruined' 'punished'. It's a birthday party. There are bigger problems. If the daughter had fun, that's awesome. If they do something the next week, that's awesome too. Be grateful that she had a party at all.

[@pooydragon5398]

@@AndSoWeLaughed again I agree with the it's just a party and kids get over stuff pretty quickly. But you absolutely "deal" with people. Let's say molly wasn't disabled, but like annoying, you would say I had to deal with that annoying girl over there. It's not an abelist thing.

[@user-wh8qx1xi3k]

With the Molly story, if her birthday isn’t made up to her, it might result in OP’s daughter not learning to treat different people the same, but rather that having different people around will ruin stuff and nobody will make it up to you. Someone should approach her and say, “I’m so proud of you for being so good with Molly, so why don’t I take you and your friends to see black widow this weekend? They can stay over after, too, if you want.” That way, she gets positive reinforcement for inviting Molly over, not negative.

[@maxsupernova]

Story 3: MIL sounds like a prime candidate for r/raisedbynarccisists. What a horrible excuse of a human being.

[@user-yu8my5qr9j]

Story 3: The best and worst punishment is to starve the kid till he apologizes and when he asks for food just say 'Do you wanna eat rotten meat and walk away"

[@365ral]

2nd Story: Welcome to r/entitledkids, where being a vegan makes it ok to ruin other people's food.

[@negative.infinity]

I cut off my siblings due to their greed. I'll never loan them money ever again. If they need money that bad, then they can sell their material belongings.

[@insanedeer844]

When I saw the part about him unplugging the freezer I knew he was one of those vegans that no one likes

[@ChristionGirl45]

The first story, OP is NOT the butt hole, she deserves that money to help her with her education. Collage is not cheap, epsicslly medical school! OP, if you are somehow reading this. Save your money, go to college and make an amazing life for yourself! Your sister should of saved her money, if she knew her husband was sick. Best of luck, OP! ❤

[@wljj56]

I agree with you Archie read that post on Reddit that pissed me off for the brother-in-law he was a dick head and his sister was a b** Op had every right not to give them any money

[@shael2042]

Honestly deer hunters are so important with the explosion of the deer population due to lack of predators, plus less road danger

[@BlackCatVll]

My Uncle and Aunt live with trees (basically forrest) around them so have deer and they even have a feeding area, which is nice and cute to watch when the deer appear🥰 But they complain like hell when there's coyotes and such in the area🤦🏻‍♀️

[@BorninVirginia]

The sad thing is most people don't realize that. Also hunters are generally the biggest wildlife advocates and do the most to protect the land.

[@genikki]

Well, humans of part of the system as well, sure we have other means to acquire our food other than hunting, but we are at the end of the day humans are predators, and if we never hunt or kill any animal, the population would rise. That would be awesome for certain animals (that are killed for 'sport'), but for others not so much, as they can also create an imbalance in the system.

[@AzureKyle]

As someone who recently (a couple months ago) hit a deer and destroyed my car, I can attest to this.

[@BorninVirginia]

@@AzureKyle welcome to the club I've hit 3 deer so far

[@TheRealVenna]

As the mother of a teen with developmental delays, I would have gone with my child to the party, just to make sure someone familiar is there, and can mitigate melt downs when my child would get close to overwhelmed. I am not there to the party, I am there as a safe space for my child to come to when they need to. I don't know if Molly's mother will see this or not, but just in case, stay close to your child, so they know they can come to you if they need to. Your child will let you know when they feel secure enough to venture out on their own. It is particularly important to be there for your child if they are entering unknown situations, and circumstances, until they are capable of recognizing their own triggers and advocating for themself to avoid becoming overwhelmed.

[@bananaphrog6048]

Does anyone else wonder what would happen if there were no more Karen’s on earth?

[@jjrulez1596]

World peace?

[@cometmoon7580]

Entitled parents will be everywhere

[@darren6577]

Reddit would be boring

[@randomspartanhoe4501]

Peace.

[@kaey6105]

well banana thats called h e a v e n

[@Alteusgirl]

Story one: sister can only blame herself if her husband does die but hey at least she'll have nice cars and a renovated house instead of the savings she could have had to save her husband

[@theprokoking7156]

Nothing like Pokémon Unite and rSlash in the morning

[@TheHitsubasa]

I don’t give a single FLIP if someone is on their death bed with numerous illnesses combined, that does NOT make you immune from being held accountable and does not give you a free pass to be a top tier jerk.

[@crystalscarlet454]

You forgot to mention in the first story that OP's BIL wouldnt let OP stay in his house! Like, I can understand the need for privacy and wanting to be alone, but they have a kid together and OP just lost her father! Not only that but OP is 18 and planning on going to college soon

[@BobRossCat]

They accommodated for his eating style and respected it, then he tries to force his eating style on them in turn?! Completely unreasonable!

[@kaniyaru117]

Concerning the last story: I honestly think taking the daughter and her friends to see another movie without Molly is the best thing they can do. Firstly, a 12yo girl really doesn't need to be "punished" for something that wasn't her fault. And yes, sometimes things don't go the way you want them to go but I don't think this is the right way to learn it. She is 12, it was her birthday. She shouldn't remember her birthday like that. Additionally, while grown-ups can be reasonable and know that Molly didn't intentionally ruin anything, OPs daughter will probably blame Molly for ruining her birthday. I think the learning opportunity here is to teach the daughter that Molly can not help her disability and meant no harm. And that they can still go see the movie and maybe find other things Molly can more easily enjoy.

[@JoViljarHaugstulen]

"I think the learning opportunity here is to teach the daughter that Molly can not help her disability and meant no harm" While well intended this is something to be careful with. People with disabilities are still people and if they are never held accountable for what they do they are unlikely to ever put in the effort to change or get better.

[@kaniyaru117]

@@JoViljarHaugstulen Well, the story specifies that Molly is going to therapy. And she is still just a child. I am also talking about a learning opportunity for OPs daughter, not Molly. Molly will grow up with her disability and learn to cope, seeing how her mother seems very supportive. OPs daughter should learn that Molly wasn't trying to harm her. Does that make it okay that she ruined the birthday? No, of course not. Things aren't suddenly all good again because "it wasn't meant to go bad". But kids can be very horrible and I think it's important to teach them early on that people with disabilities like that just need you to be a bit more patient sometimes. The lesson shouldn't be "sometimes things go to shit" because a 12yo really doesn't need to learn that over a ruined birthday. The lesson should be that some situations are not suited for Molly, at least not in her current state, but that doesn't make her a bad person.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

That 3rd one. WOW....anyone I know if visiting an ill loved one would help out around the house because of the extra work that spouse would have. People truly blow my mind. 🤯

[@DarkFireElement94]

I blaming this on the Vegan Teacher.

[@nexum3513]

Story number 1 op is not the butthole his sister is completely able to pay she just wants more money and greed while taking advantage of your kindness and her family's kindness

[@daniella9787]

In the last story i'd still take my daughter and the girls to watch the black widow movie and take Molly with my daughter the weekend after to do something that won't upset her (maybe a zoo or something else Molly's mom thinks she'll like). BUTTT her mom has to come with us incase something happens. Molly may not feel comfortable with me yet because she doesn't know me that well and i'm not sure I could help calm her down as good as her parents can. I'm neither trained, experienced or qualified 🤷🏽‍♀️. With time the girls could maybe turn into friends but that can't be forced😁

[@MINGIRL1979]

If OP's daughter is wise she'll never "hang out" with Molly the brat again after she ruined HER birthday party! Stealing the first slice of cake meant for OP's daughter, crying because the pizza that was ordered didn't have HER favorite toppings on it, crying because the Cruella movie was too "scary" for her which forced them to leave early resulting in OP's daughter missing the movie SHE really wanted to see for HER birthday, throwing a game controller because she lost, then sulking and not wanting to play anymore games?! Wow what a little bratty baby!

[@daniella9787]

@@MINGIRL1979 uhm i wouldn't really call her a brat. 😶😶She's got a disorder right?! So it's not all her fault. But the mom really ahouldn't have let her daughter alone. She should've joined in to keep her daughter calm and respectfull. It's on the mom imo

[@rosegomez2966]

EXACTLY! GET THEM OUT!! Good for yelling! Do NOT ALLOW THEM BACK! Your in laws are TOXIC!

[@Basically_Anybody]

Final story: taking the daughter and her friends for pizza and a movie is fine. Treating it as a "make up birthday party" would be a butthole move because it would impart on the daughter that is was a mistake to include Molly in her birthday party. The easiest way to approach it is to take just the daughter to see Black Widow and treat her for being kind to include Molly.

[@nataliazakula3400]

That’s really a great suggestion. Her friends can learn the life lesson that stuff happens that can ruin events, however birthday girl should get a small reward for being a trooper.

[@rogue9230]

@@nataliazakula3400 I remember wanting toys from target my parents couldn't afford back then as most kids I cried like a little bitch, that's the way to teach kids life isn't fair if I was handed all the stuff I wanted I would have been an entitled spoiled kid, I'm thankful for that, but teaching this lesson on someones special day is an asshole move.

[@ghostnebula8805]

But it was a mistake.

[@kamoogy]

You are 1000% correct on story #1. I hope she sees this.

[@agentmaryland1239]

Story 1) OP is under no obligation to give up their half of the inheritance money to their sister because their sister made poor choices. If she knew her husband was that ill, she should have used her half to pay for his surgery. She knew what she was doing. OP is not the asshole and OP's friend is right, giving their sister money is just going to cripple their chances of living a better life. Story 2) I'm all for supporting those who choose to live a meat free lifestyle, but you are not entitled to force that kind of lifestyle on others. We are omnivorous, we are meant to eat both, it's been in our diet for generations. Personal opinion but I don't know if someone who is 15 should be making a decision like that so early in life when they're easily influenced. If this was a decision they made themselves then it's fine, but if they were socially influenced, then someone needs to sit down and talk with this kid. Because drastic changes like that are not a passing fad. OP is not the asshole here because they were respecting their child's decision to go meat free, that does not entitle the child to force such a thing on their parents, so they are likely influenced by an outside source to go meat free and judging by their reaction, likely someone who's *very* insistent on everyone around them going meat free too. Story 3) It's called make your own damn dinner before you come over, or if you're not going to at least offer moral support and wish a speedy recovery, don't come over at all. They have no reason to be there especially since all they do is make a mess and demand to be fed. OP's dealing with enough as is and doesn't need this stress while pregnant and taking care of her husband. OP's gets 0 points for standing their ground. The MIL gets a 3 for being an entitled brat. Story 4) OP's the asshole for encouraging exclusion of others for being different? That's far from the truth, OP *encouraged* their daughter to invite the new girl on the block even though she had something that made her different. The only reason OP wants to have a repeat birthday for their daughter is because the girl they invited literally ruined the party. OP is trying to ensure their daughter is happy, someone else's kid isn't their priority. How they feel shouldn't be on the forefront of their mind because they don't know them. OP's S/O is literally saying that you should take into consideration a stranger's feelings before your own child's. OP gets 0 points.

[@cressellahanns8417]

Sister: *cries* we don’t have the money for the surgery. His health should be top priority! *buys expensive cars and luxury items*

[@jakstrieder]

also I give Molly's mom 1 but hole for not offering the chaperone the party with OP knowing that OP wouldn't be able to handle Molly the right way to keep her calm. I'm sure Molly's mom and dad just wanted a evening alone so they dumped Molly onto OP for the party then ignored the phone calls, they probably did it a lot before the move so their very good at faking apologetic excuses. taking that last thought to a darker extreme.. they might have moved because they ran out of people willing to fall for their excuses.

[@katestarnes1709]

Sometimes people make mistakes, it’s not always some malicious con

[@idalehmann4874]

OP making son clean the freezer was awesome. He should learn there are consequences for bad actions.

[@JediLadyMisty]

Before taking any child that’s not yours to see a movie double and maybe even triple check with the child’s parents that the child will be okay with the chosen movie as they might not be okay with it. We haven’t shown Detective Pikachu to my ten year old niece yet because she can become upset easily and due to the topic of a missing parent her mom wants to be present to help comfort/reassure her if things get too scary for her.

[@annasstorybox7906]

Well... That's what pg ratings are for. If a kid is easily upset by movies/activities that are deemed suitable for their peers than it's the parents responsibility to inform others, so they can adapt to that or maybe help that kid to overcome some fears (in case of kids that don't have a mental illness but just are scared of something kids their age usually do without a problem. Sometimes peers or people who aren't the parents have an easier time getting a kid to do something than the parents. Like kids that would not do as much as jumping from the edge of the pool that suddenly, when together with similarly aged kids in swimming lessons they becime encouraged and start using the big slides or even go jump from the high boards.)

[@thelurkerbel0w]

Man that kid unplugging the freezer wasting that meat. Those deer died for nothing, that's worse then eating meat.