rangers v celtic

comedy

[@craigguild5579]

I'm 52 now, and a Rangers fan since I was about 7 or 8, but I have always loved The Big Yin since I was about 10 or 11, always has been and always will be my favourite Comedian, even though he's a Celtic fan through n through, Big Billy is a God in my eyes, a total Legend. I was totally gutted when he was struck down with Parkinson's Disease, still full of admiration for him as he battles the Disease.

[@TheXitone]

aye fuck sectarianism ! its a con the british use to divide us good on ye pal.

[@lindaralston424]

My dad was a personal friend of Billy Connolly and his band mate Tam Harvey, when he wasnt yet famous and his band was 'The Humblebums'. He came from Partick, and wasnt really a football fan at all. He just uses it for the banter. He loves a laugh and music, but not really into football, except to joke about it. Love the guy, he's genuis.

[@thomasjones4965]

Iam Bluenose, Aye I Was Gutted, 2, Mate,

[@hughoneill368]

Connar Maxy get back on your xbox or ps4 you wee shit stain i suppose its the only way you can get a win against the celtic these day eh !! COYBIG !!!!!!

[@gjw000]

'even though he is a Celtic fan'?? How open minded of you

[@angels77100]

As a Celtic fan. The first time I heard this joke by Billy I'd imagined it as a Celtic fan going into the Rangers end. But years later (when I'd practically forgotten the joke) a Rangers fan who I worked alongside, told me the joke but he was imagining it as a Rangers fan going into the Celtic end. Works for both, it's just a great joke.

[@gbormann71]

@Rory Devin It comes with a nice little backdoor, doesn't it?

[@alanrobertson7333]

Aye and on the Monday they back to the work and it’s back to normal ! Banter is banter by the way

[@angels77100]

@@alanrobertson7333 Absolutely right Alan. That's how it should be.

[@johnjenkins2768]

I was at the celtic rangers final and a guy next to me had a green and white shirt a green white hat a green and white scarf and he had a wee poodle dug with green and white stripes on it and every time celtic scored a goal the dug stood on it's hind legs and clapped it's paws . I said that's amazing you will make a fortune with that dug, what does it dae when Rangers scores a goal. Oh he said it goes up in the air and does su mmersaults. I said how many? He said it all depends on how hard I kick it's arse.

[@adamgordon8757]

John Jenkins

[@jimodonnell6444]

John Jenkins brilliant God bless you my pal

[@stacyblue1980]

hahaa! That was great !

[@johnjenkins2768]

My Dr advised me to move house to Gorgie Road Edinburgh he said it'a healthy area'. There's not been a heart attack there for years

[@Samspianopage]

HAHAHA, Cin I copy that one bud to show to ma pals? Cheers.

[@laughingoutloud5742]

There's no words to Express how much I appreciate this post!! I grew up listening to Billy Connolly and this is one of my absolute FAVOURITE comedy skits ever!! 9 1/2 guitars is awesome too🇨🇦🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

[@chrispayne7060]

Classic , never fails to make you laugh even though you know the ending . pure brilliant . billy is one of a kind

[@thomasjones2415]

Diffently,

[@robinblackmoor8732]

I was thinking the same thing. Billy's stories are always funny, no matter how many times you here them.

[@user-wp5ix9hy8c]

The man doesn't tell jocks he tell funny stories thanks Billy ❤❤❤❤

[@markherzog9484]

Beautifully delivered skit, but remember, he never says which teams fan gets the bovril or which craps in the shoes……..

[@lyndsaycrawford]

Brilliant, I totally forgot the punchline, which is always a bonus when you hear it again 😂😂😂

[@nickadams1519]

Sending love ❤️…Lyndsay…Are you single?

[@edwardmeldrum3023]

Simply the funniest man ever...love you Billy

[@ToonandBBfan]

I first heard this as a kid on my Uncle's Billy Connolly record, I was on the floor laughing at it!

[@DonforDead]

I'm a Rangers fan but I fucking love this man

[@nickandrew1089]

CLASSIC! The tears are streaming down my legs😅😅😅😅

[@thomasjones2415]

Diffently

[@johnpauldocherty38]

Guys a fucking legend!

[@BobJJ9999]

The man is the best comic we have ever had!

[@1926reilly]

Kevin Bridges runs him close

[@Winter-gf9nt]

His material comes from the late great chick Murray

[@billymonroe9574]

“Put it.....on” 😂

[@cwpo1973]

@DonforDead What's great is that Billy's clearly a Celtic fan, but you'd never know it from the joke itself. He tells it neutrally, so both Rangers and Celtic fans can laugh equally.

[@jrodgers1961]

I don't watch him, but over the years when I've happened to see him, he has been churning out the old shipyard stuff.

[@5times55]

Billy, so funny in them days.

[@martinmurray9979]

God bless you Billy. We all love you. Scottish legend.

[@IanMcCully]

Billy connolly is so funny , no matter who or what he is talking about, i am a rangers fan thanks

[@avril-joycrook2426]

you always make me laugh til my face hurts god bless you billy I am so glad you made it to the top life would be dull if you had never taken up comedy

[@OutlawLoveSong]

This is how I learned about the Old Firm as a 15 year old. Hilarious.

[@werdna1690]

And with a guest appearance by Archie at the end made it even better

[@liisavarhalla6348]

Fantastic!! Ty Billy!!!

[@CapitalBhoy78]

Hilarious story! I would be biased but this is definitely the case of a Celtic fan going into the Rangers end and not vice versa.

[@davidmcavoy9922]

I love billy but it's no the same listing to him as watching him still hilarious though

[@lafazanio]

the closed captions of this clip are out of this galaxy lol

[@michaelcraven1mc]

lafazanio LIAR ....THERE ARE NO CLOSED CAPTIONS....💩

[@jimodonnell6444]

Billy for f--k sake I've never laughed so much in my life brilliant!!

[@jrdouglas]

READ PLEASE : The 28th September 2012 will be the centenary of the Ulster Solemn League and Covenant against Home Rule. Far less well known is the ‘Alternative Ulster Covenant’, signed in October 1913 by some twelve thousand Protestants from County Antrim in support of Home Rule and against partition. The Alternative Covenant was written by Rev JB Armour and Roger Casement.

[@andybelfield6034]

Rodger casement? Is that the bloke who went to Africa to abuse young boys.

[@youtubeviewer7030]

i got this on the pick of billy conolly album i first heard it in australia 1983 its a classic

[@jrdouglas]

Another quote: "After the Ballymoney meeting, a deputation met the British Prime Minister Asquith, 26th November 1913. A mixture of businesspeople, trade unionists & academics: Professor Henry (Queens University Belfast), David Campbell (Belfast Trade Council) & Alex Wilson. ...

[@RobertK1993]

Up Irish Republic

[@dustinator4u2000]

It's no joke. Eternity is forever.

[@isaacdavis1]

Great!!! What album is that on mate?

[@raibeartmacghilleandrais3596]

JIM WATF84 Everytime I hear this. It reminds me of big Stu Wilson. Remember the time, he got his skull fractured(with a half brick) and he went around the wrong end at Parkhead? I thought I was seeing things when the ambulance guy brought him round the track to the Rangers end. What a guy btw.

[@hmssectionred8095]

Rab am in lanzarote the now i arrive bac the day after the big walk,,, the whiterock are playing in the club that day! Fancy a beer that day? Let me know david/ rab....5th july.

[@raibeartmacghilleandrais3596]

JIM WATF84​ I'll See how I feel Jim. I think I'll be completely shattered after a day on the piss. Can't handle it the way I used too. We'll see. But I'm no getting any younger Jim.:) Hope the holiday is going well buddy! Real firm #1

[@hmssectionred8095]

Try and make it mate! Need a wee catch up and the whiterock are the biz!! Watf

[@raibeartmacghilleandrais3596]

I will do Jim. You know me. I don't like commiting to something. Then being a no-show. It sounds good aswell. "Don't fooking book holidays. That make you miss the Boyne Celebrations Jim!". The only time. Awe the auld firm turn out for a good day & night oot. (Know who's just shouted me there.with the auld ("why did uefa say rangers finnished on 2012 ?) That plank craig whyte! He obviously never tippled my different profile. After weeks of all us explaining it. Link after link. After link. He's thick as shite Jim. I've told him if he pluses me again. He's for the black button. (I wonder how long he'll last?) No long eh?

[@raibeartmacghilleandrais3596]

He wasn't one of they cunts "I'll never support Rangers again!" Was he. Ffs. Just after the referendum. There was tonnes of them Jim. I'm no shy. When it comes to telling the truth about what I am. We're part of a PUL community. If it was just Unionists it would be called U same if it was just Protestants. It would be called the P community. No everycunt has the same views Jim. The big argument after the referendum. You know the guy with the MR STRUTH CHANNEL.He said to me. RTID meens more to some people than others. I thought he was spot on mate. Where is it the night Jim. Happy hour.lol

[@courtneypurdy9565]

He's so funny always has been brilliant

[@jennyboard5534]

no need to take it so seriously, it's only a game!!

[@karenwilson9658]

Classic no stopped laughing

[@ianclarke5404]

I was in the wrong end at a merseyside derby, we were winning 2-0 halftime, we lost 3-2

[@mariusstrmglendrange2411]

What the game is all about in the end up there, great story sir ❤️

[@sundance1998]

what show this from mate?

[@robsargent4]

@goddamikickass Only problem with that is that a fair bit of Northumberland and Cumbria are North of Hadrian's wall.

[@like2surf]

Billy's a Celtic Fan.

[@druss69harad61]

I've still got this on vinyl

[@donnawilson8663]

Great Billy hail hail 10 in a row🇨🇮🇨🇮🇨🇮

[@neilshearer6899]

I love the big yin

[@220773]

And most of all, one of the few Celtic supporters who speaks some sense and respects 'the other end'... after all, he's a true Scot.

[@klimeyjohnston8452]

Any Glasgow Celtic fan wae sense despises the hunz lols

[@220773]

@@klimeyjohnston8452 Any sensible Scotsman despises a big lot of the Celtic fans who still rally for the Republic of Ireland national team and most of all the IRA insanity. You're all alone here, remember, you're locked up in some parts of Glasgow, either way you go it's people disliking you. Unless you prove you're Scottish indeed, of course. No lols.

[@klimeyjohnston8452]

@@220773 Scots wha hae wi Wallace bled...the guid folk of Alba ken the score aboot da HUNZ...nabody likes them but they don't care!!! Just bow to your Champions sir.

[@220773]

@@klimeyjohnston8452 William Wallace wasnae any Catholic... remember that... and you Sellik fans support Ireland, not Scotland, even your only Saltire al Sellik Pork is GREEN!!! We wave saltires all over Ibrox and... well, I'm sorry for ye, Rangers is Scotland. We're still the most supported team throughout the country.

[@klimeyjohnston8452]

@@220773 ye talkin boot ma country wae that name😂

[@paulmcdaid6070]

Absolutely love Billy connelly the best end

[@IanMcCully]

lmfao this is hilarious

[@jamiecallaghan1143]

That's a belter ... Well done big man

[@ken8of8]

An oldy but still relevant, and as funny as fuck. Onya Big yin.

[@worldcoup]

Down tools. Genius at work.

[@curleyteeth]

He is up there with Carlin and Hicks, but a tad higher to me being British.Jim.Liverpool.

[@jrdouglas]

a quote from the Covenant: ‘Ulstermen have been sold by political trickery, arming and drilling against the perceived enemy. The enemy they are been led against, is no enemy at all: Catholic Ireland, Nationalist Ireland, desires not triumph over Ulster, they seek only friendship and goodwill.’ Casement appealed to the spirit of 1798, when Irish Catholics and Protestants had fought together for an independent Republic.

[@RobertK1993]

Ulster Protestants are entrenched living in 17th century

[@PhilK005]

You whistling another provo anthem while typing that ? LOL

[@Paulholmesuk1]

Brilliant stuff from the Big Yin..

[@alanrobertson7333]

Good old Scottish humour 😂😂😂😂

[@neilshearer6899]

He absolutely makes me powerless wi’ laughter

[@thomasjones2415]

Very Funny Story About Th Old Firm Derby,

[@jameskilday4361]

Too funny 😊

[@thomasjones4965]

Th Best Ever Story, About, Th Old Firm Derby,

[@DonforDead]

@cwpo1973 Exactly, I've said this to my Dad who I've passed it on to...There's not a single reason to hate this man if you're a Rangers fan..

[@P5YcHoKiLLa]

What's that rattling noise? Yer keyboard or yer rosaries?

[@djdaz831]

@weedougiemc ... "Celtic jerseys are not for second best, They don't shrink to fit inferior players" - Jock Stein

[@Io-Io-Io]

Billy ! Billy ! Billy ! :)

[@thomasjones4965]

Iam A Bluenose, But I Just Love Billy Connolly,

[@johnmilliken1983]

Up The RA...you orange bastards☘

[@swissnor]

Jy was uit jou ma se gat gebore want haar poes was te besig dawie joubert draadtrekker.

[@fionamcintosh6176]

Good ending to the story 😂😅

[@kevinjackson292]

There's a certain famous Team that plays at Hampden Park ... Queens Park!

[@tommyboomboom]

@ohugitmeueffingc wow, what a pragmatic and modern view of Scotland you have

[@twosacrowd]

Well said mate!

[@jrdouglas]

...The deputation emphasised to Asquith that those who were organising the Ulster Volunteer Force, an illegal militia established to resist Home Rule by force, were for the most part landlords, their tenants & their dependants. These paramilitaries did not speak for the Protestants of Ulster."

[@annepollock4783]

Rangers forever 🔴⚪️🔵

[@nicolekeyes3387]

Did u say Rangers m8 the Rangers are deed stop talking crap jobbies are coming out you're mouth talking about tham need a nappy there mate cmon Glasgow Celtice glasgows green and white kill the Rangers aw wait their deed lol

[@TheCamscot]

+Stacey Slike We were all over you in the old firm

[@jesspee1480]

We all not Rangers died in 2012

[@jesspee1480]

+Jess Pee Celtic till I die

[@quinn79]

lol just brilliant

[@amymcphee6319]

Follow follow billy 😂

[@justdance3133]

Country stilled ruled by one flag 🇬🇧proud nation, people, how lucky we are to be as other country's are in dissary and war torn, god bless everyone in this world, ✌️

[@cas6110]

Class

[@WorshipInTruth]

@Tiwaz81 That is right.

[@christineohara6647]

Gaun; big yin.

[@EJames303]

I cudnt stop loling xD

[@neillanda1268]

Rangers v Celtic Hearts v Hibs its bang on Mans a legend

[@Io-Io-Io]

One word this guy really likes: 'wee'.

[@Band-maid-fan101]

Thats common Scottish language

[@Ravinrichard]

yer maws the local bike, what??

[@davidgormley1880]

Richard Whitelaw meant to be derogatory term for promiscuity

[@Tiwaz81]

@WorshipInTruth Yes. In all its a very interesting subject.

[@toefltoeic8290]

Last I heard Ranghers were bankrupt....are they still a going concern? My friend from Scotland told me he saw them playing in Perehead. True??

[@najeyrifai1134]

They're still about, but they are bankrupt.

[@TheXitone]

wrong its another team lol Rangers no more.

[@hooperceltCeltic]

No,Rangers are dead so they don't exist any more, they died and buried in 2012AD,so if you want your Rangers back,you'll need a spade ,keep digging,but you'll only find dust Rangers FC,R.I.P.

[@elizabethhancock5720]

Robert Penman

[@scottg4984]

Rangers still exist, despite what Celtic fans say but in truth you'd be better trying to avoid the two of them, both as bitter and twisted as each other.

[@PhilK114]

Shakespeare summed up the Celtic and Rangers types - A plague on both their houses. This is quite funny, though.

[@tmdrdd]

Brilliant the way he didn't mention which fan it was who got lost, leaving it up to the audience to decide for themselves. In the beginning, there are a mix of Cheers and Boos from the audience when the Old Firm teams are mentioned. And at the end, no matter what team you support, everyone had a good laugh. The way it should be. Although I do personally believe it was a Rangers fan who got lost in the Celtic section :p

[@barnabyhoofer8044]

Nor does he mention if the match took place at Celtic Park, Ibrox or Hampden.

[@alansutherland1996]

@Atreadis its like bistro gravy its actually good wee man you should try it

[@patrickloftus9758]

exelent. hope he gets back tae his self. whas like us?

[@220773]

As a Rangers man as I am... HILARIOUS. Wonder-Billie.

[@nicolekeyes3387]

Hahahha did u say Rangers who are they aww soz m8 meant the Rangers c non Glasgow Celtice glasgows green and white c mom Bobby sands I'm 12 and know al Celtice history IRA don't call me British I'm Scottish

[@220773]

Do call me British, I'm Scottish.

[@RobertK1993]

@@220773 No Scottish pattiot call themselves British

[@P5YcHoKiLLa]

Riiiiiiight...and Harry Potter is a good set of stories too, only no-one ever died because of them.

[@jimarnott5929]

Not a patch on Dave Allen he's the master ?

[@andyreid8265]

class

[@Mroxdeath]

haha! qaulity ending

[@blade0954]

classic story!

[@Toolpusher]

'Mon the Hibees, first tae wear the green ;)

[@dirtglider]

i really have no liking for football but if i didnt say i was a celtic fan my old man would dis-own me lol

[@stinkyboy2007]

@ohugitmeueffingc im going with the later in your comment , the ocasional beating never done me any harm as a kid........ the first part of your comment , well it explaines itself , thanks for pointing this out to the youtube community...........................

[@P5YcHoKiLLa]

Well the first part of your sentence is correct..."No one ever went to heaven"....and that's because it doesn't exist.

[@colingehrman7078]

Brilliant big yin , from a rangers fan . Av been in that situation ,

[@MIsection6UK]

Classic!!!

[@schotte7070]

@Livy2K Yes Yes Yes Brilliant

[@WorldDisputes]

@TheKMCW Most famous scotish team

[@Baseballschaap]

... i went to a catholic school (from 2yrs old to 12 that is) but i'm atheist as well so... besides, in Billy's time there weren't all that many non-catholic schools anywhere :)