Real Life Comes First (World First Raiding Drama)

[@shallowrs]

hilarious timing to drop this video

[@KaiKouran]

Smart tactics

[@nowaykoda6104]

For real!!!!!!! 😂

[@henriedavid]

What about it? Is there tea about static?

[@ahndks]

@@henriedavid I think there was a person who got dragged through the mud recently because they commented about how there are not many female raiders doing world first, and then their ex plus a girl they cheated on said ex with quoted their tweet and called them out for the cheating.

[@Zevi-j5t]

@@ahndks Well, while this game definitely has the most balanced female/male ratio of players ive seen for an mmo, majority of players are mostly fine being casual. So its kinda weird complaining about female raiders specifically not doing world first imo.

[@MrJjjakey]

These guys were not world first racing, they were a late W1 (realistically W2) group larping as world racers. By the time they finally beat O10S, the actual racers were all on O12S. They also fell into a ton of traps that world first groups typically spend months preparing to avoid, which is extremely suspect. For example: - Proper trialing would have easily surfaced consistency and learning problems. - They didn't have a 9th man on standby ready to fill when OP had to drop. I can't stress this point enough, most teams that make it in the top 3 slots have 1-4 people analyzing vods, making toolboxes for mechanics, or getting ready to fill in case something happens and a player needs to be replaced. - 10 hours on a 2nd floor without any course correction by the party lead to keep on pace. So yeah, this group was a HC W1 group that was dreaming a bit too big and OP shouldn't feel bad.

[@Brutalchoas1]

Hi. Pathra, I dunno if you remember me, I was commenting on one of your live streams that my mom just had a bleeding g in her brain and, well this story hits me because real life does happen in unexpected ways, mine was that my mother fought against this bleeding in her brain for a few months but unfortunately she past away at April 9th. I was actually riding with my static and just couldn’t go on of course, most did say sorry for my loss, but some said the same thing in messages they sensed to me, so I know how the OP feels. Anyways take care all.

[@pathra]

I’m so sorry for your loss 😢

[@kreater120]

I'm sorry for your lose. Please don't take these randoms words to heart. They don't know what a true family bond is and never will with that attitude. Stay strong, am very sure your mom is proud of you!

[@BlackShogun]

Aint no damn way some online randos are gonna press me over some IRL business. I know all raiders arent like this but I would likely cuss someone and get booted.

[@Cloverism]

Those people that care about the game more than real life - they are losers. I can’t imagine giving anyone in my static crap when real life comes up …. Or anyone in my group giving me crap.

[@Ysill88]

Sadly tons of players treat XIV like a 2nd life, especially due to things like mare I've noticed which I had only got for cosmetics, then found out why a lot of others use it. I mean it's fine, but it also seems to bring out the worst in people, or you see more of them anyway. I got rid of it after half a year.

[@Eliyanyx]

People are so unhinged it's almost like pure cinema entertainment

[@Sonnabend00]

This is what you get when you treat a game like a job. Its a game. Thats all it is, all it will ever be.

[@Disapointedmellencol]

normaly ive seen those types refured to as no life ultimet players. no one wants to play with them, and with the new blacklist we can make sure we never do since it now blacklists the persons alts as well

[@MidnightEkaki]

its fine to be emotionally invested in a game and enjoy spending your free time playing it but yeah you need to be able to separate it from real life and remember 'its never that deep'

[@Ichigo8691]

How disgusting those players. I'm sorry that happened to you OP.

[@omensoffate]

Eh most of these are made up or spiced up to be entertaining

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

@@omensoffate But you don't know which ones are or aren't. Like did you see the Xeno lawsuit situation? Some people really are that freaking awful over a game. Heck I've met some borderline unhinged people in game.

[@omensoffate]

@@MariAbbas-dq4et oh for sure but I don’t take anything i hear on the internet as pure fact.

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

@@omensoffate Well here is the thing it is possible to have empathy for a hypothetical situation, just as it is possible to have a serious and deep conversation about a hypothetical situation. We discuss it with the assumption that it's real, rather than outright dismissing it, rather we think it's real or not. Do I think everything said online is real? No. Do I think it's possible some of them are real? Absolutely. Do I know which one's? Absolutely not unless it's just an objectively proven lie like when a SCH tried to tell me they get Free Cure for half the MP of WHM when 1. SCH doesn't have Free Cure and 2....there is no half of of free, Free Cure literally means it costs no MP unless someone is going to tell me what half of 0 is 🤣

[@Ichigo8691]

@MariAbbas-dq4et Thank you. This is how i feel about it as well. Real or not. My statement stands because this can happen to anyone.

[@mattfletcher2270]

Welcome back Pathra! 👋 As a raider myself, I would like to offer a small word to anyone thinking of doing savage raids but are put off by stories like this. "Don't be." Stories like this are extreme cases, & exactly why they make good drama content. Most of the people you meet will be chill & it's up to you to vet them & their attitudes, just like it's their job to vet you as a good player. Talk to statics, take your time & gage their energy. If it's too spicy, politely leave & look elsewhere. Once you find a chill group they would never turn you like this no matter the situation.

[@TakaChan569]

idk the higher end the content is the easier it is for people to crack when crap goes wrong and people lose their minds, it's why i stopped caring about the high end.

[@Zevi-j5t]

@@TakaChan569 I probably did the fights for extremes like 20 times trying to gear up this expansion for savages for dawntrail, and doing savages now I've only ran into a couple shitters that I can count on my hand. It really is miniscule. I dont have a static and use PF, as well.

[@Disapointedmellencol]

its sad, a very simular thing happened to me when I was a sprout, waaay back in ARR, it made me leave and not pick the game back up until shadowbringers was over and in that inbtween staage before endwalker. It's what made me start making my own PFs so that folks who learn the dark souls way(by eating the floor on repeat) could have a space where there would be no salt, no screaming over little mistakes, becuase not all of us can learn by watching hecktor on repeat. some only learn by doing it. some have disabilitys.or kids/pets. and NEED that chill envoroment. every now and then a no life ultament jerk would pop in (clearly not reading the PF) and try to manspalain/take over the party, then theyd remove themselves after 1 pull(sometimes not even 1 pull I've had one jerk aptilynamed CHAD Get so tilted over a milisecond to early pull that he jumped to his death and since we left him on the FLOOR insted of jumping with him, he closed his whole game just to leave, after spewing vitryal in chat.) Sadly these types are getting more and more noticed in the communty as more and more no life ultimet players are invading PF, like if you want to be hard corse make a static, PF is for those of us that do not WANT the drama of a static. I know folks who will NOT use discourd AT ALL thanks to the no lifers that have come before that insted of calmly explain mecs, insted spewed their anger in YELLING and cussing. like just not cool. sorry for the rambling

[@nauscakes1868]

And just to throw some more into it. There's a difference between Hardcore raiding and "going for a World First." It's like playing a sport with your buddies and aiming for the Olympics. Don't shoot for a gold unless you want incredible pressure and are dedicated to give everything you have for it. Just stay in your lane. Casual and hardcore raiding is fine. Just don't sign up for world first raiding. It's a whole different ballgame.

[@BadaBadger]

Perfect Timing I JUST clocked in for work and needed something to listen to ❤

[@Rayshaze]

Yayyy new pathra video!!

[@talonmage40k]

Bro. This is why I don't do serious raiding. People are so weird.

[@Fwhalon]

It highly depends on the people. When I was first looking for a static in Gordias, even casual groups were cutthroat but that didn't stop me from looking for statics. I run my own static now but I also know what to look out for both for recruiting and when looking for a group. It's not all bad.

[@xxsonata]

these are extreme cases. ive been raiding since 2013 and been in multiple statics and have never encountered anything like this. dont treat "drama" as the norm, it makes no sense.

[@octogames6823]

Sounds like my old roommates. They all are hard core raiders and they get verbally abusive to one another. I refuse to raid because of the toxicity. I will fight people in rl so why would I allow someone to speak to me like that in a game?

[@lonethehunter7535]

Casual content and crafting is the way to go, raiding scene is too much time commitment and toxic af. I rather start clearing out my backlog of games, besides by the .55 patch everyone will be at the same item level.

[@williek08472]

Babe wake up, new Patra drama story dropped (Also, I can confirm I took a few days off when Dawntrail came out, I was that excited. It was worth it.)

[@xxsonata]

these are extreme cases. ive been raiding since 2013 and been in multiple statics and have never encountered anything like this. dont treat "drama" as the norm, it makes no sense. people in the comments acting like this is all raiders and that's why they dont raid are ridiculous lol

[@diabetickakashi]

The amount of people I know that have ruined their life and soiled their personality to raiding is ridiculous 😢 It makes me thankful that my raid group is a bunch of chill friends with jobs/lives and children outside the game so we all understand eachother

[@azorien8413]

Wow some people are crazy. I can understand taking time off for a game (will do so for Dragon Age: Veiguard), but that schedule and that abuse, that's a no. I can't seem to ever catch a Twitch stream but glad to see more of these videos, thank you! :D

[@toxictropics3314]

I know many others have said this in the comments but I would just like to echo - this is not ALL raiders. If you have wanted to try hard content/raiding but you're nervous or unsure, please do not let these extreme stories deter you from trying it out! You should always be given the opportunity to test the vibes and if they don't match with you then another group will! I'm someone who always wanted to raid but was afraid to jump into it. And now I'm a static leader and I love my little raid group so much! More specifically about the drama tho - it's truly wild to me that there are actually players who act like this and feel this way. Life is always top priority! And life doesn't wait for a *convenient* time outside of raid/releases/etc. I hope OP can someday feel a bit more at peace and maybe even try to raid again with a more caring group of people.

[@robind.2290]

A long time player and raider from WoW, I decided to try raiding in FFX14 as well. It didnt work out for me at all. I unknowingly joined an FC guild that was mostly raiders and there was alot of pressure to perform. It turned out I wasn't up to their standards. I was shunned by the other FC members, so much so that I left, changed my name, fanatasia-ed, and didnt interact with any of them after that. That was my first few months of playing. It soured my attitude toward extremes and raiding ever since. FFX14 is an awesome game, but I mostly play solo now.

[@andytroschke2036]

Group was just horrible. 1. Verbal abuse kills momentum and delays prog. They weren't in it to challenge themself, they were in it to uphold their ego which builds on W1 clears - which is usually why people that want to participate in HC Raiding are super toxic and get emotional about mistakes/prog walls. 2. If you NEED 8 players, bring 10 or 11. If you are serious about going for W1, bring people that can watch in DC and hop in should an emergency arise - I've seen family issues, health issues and even spontaneous PC deads. It can all happen, and if you're suddenly at 7/8 having your prog ruined, it's the fault of whoever planned the group.

[@tezmirtautly5102]

Thanks for another video Pathra!

[@pehpunkt]

This current tier is my first ever savage tier as I only started playing in November 2023. I had done some extremes before but nothing else. I was lucky enough to be able to make a static with lovely FC friends and my partner and we are a nice little group who have gone at a nice pace and are up to a M3S clear and progging M4S. Not every raider is this toxic and I am really sorry for OP that they had to go through this. That being said I would also not go join a random static, especially as a woman, for various reasons.

[@Phoenixplaysrpgs]

Jesus the things that ppl will make an issue over! I told someone their character looked cool bc they looked like yugiri and they said I was creeping on them

[@ChaosOfTiamat]

I played Guild Wars 2 for 11 years or so, and most of my friends left because they have stuff in their lives that's important. It made me sad, but I get it, I don't expect someone to be in Discord 24/7, that's just selfish. There are still a few of us that hang out and play various games in Discord occasionally, but we all understand that real life comes first, and this is why all of them are still my friends, even if I don't talk to them as much anymore.

[@neon9152]

The deal is, truly, that only 8 people will make world first out of tens of thousands and it absolutely will not be you, so maybe empathize and realize your friend is human instead? I promise that is more valuable in the end than raging over something so nonsense.

[@krum9250]

Yeah this is why I just raid with friends most ppl have told me I should open up more to raiding groups but I refuse to cause of stuff like this and that ain’t changing no time soon. Glad op was able to get out of there cause it wasn’t gonna get any better.

[@KindredEmotions]

I can’t imagine expecting people to lock in to that degree for an unofficial, unsanctioned competition like world first raiding in FF14.

[@RvnWolf]

Yeah it's those players who were the real losers,no real accomplishments I bet.

[@phostings]

This is why I don't do Raids in FFXIV anymore. I did it during the binding coils when it first released. The drama never seems to end with those static teams. And for why? So you can be world first? Call me a boomer, but I've tanked as Rune Fencer in some serious endgame events in FFXI. I also healed in some of the game's most difficult boss fights and raids. No telegraphs, only messages in chat and you hope and pray you see what the boss is about to do before it activates it. But the drops for these events always stayed relevant throughout the years and people til this day still farm those weapons and gear because of its unique stats and how it works with new gear. It was and still is worth the time and hard work to gather the items to get some of the baddest weapons and gear in the game. Entry to those fights in FFXI requires sometimes weeks of preparation and that's only gathering the items you need to get in. Once in, you have one shot to get it right or you're waiting a week before you can try again. This is the time to reflect on what could've been done better and what gear could benefit the team. This is what a true static needs, time to collaborate with your team and discuss some of the issues that arised in the fights and how to improve. I could talk about the difference between both games all day, but the main thing is, FFXIV is about having fun with others and trying your best to work together and clear fun content. I wouldn't advise anyone to do this with a static who wants world first. Its simply not worth the mental beating you take, specially when the drops will be obsolete in a few patches.

[@martinpospischil8046]

Yeah, totally understand you. After my experiences i can say, just raiding pf is the best possibiliety to enjoy all of it at ur own speed and reallife situations. Since dawntrail release i have the feeling people in pf seems to be nice and respectfull. Which was a bit suprising tbh^^ But yeah i cleared the 4 savage raids in week 5 and it was my best raid experience in ff14 so far. Take care, have a good time :)

[@LucasC41-e9v]

OP left too late and scarred. Just leave! Do this not just in-game situations, irl as well. Never underestimate yourself! You deserve better and its not worth it! I live here at japan and had groups that dont understand why my character suddenly stopped. Im used to earthquakes but I set my phone to alarm for bigger ones SO if my phome alarms I'll just grab my stuffs and be ready (usually for bigger ones, area alarm/sirens will go off as well). Im not gonna prioritize apologizing to everyone when its my life that is on the matter. im so glad i surround myself now with ppl who can understand each others situation.

[@sagakun06]

typical sweaty raiders behaviour 🤷

[@cheonchi]

👀🍵 yummy monday updates~ ty pathra!!

[@invadererc2365]

Did we ever figure out why they were so cold at the beginning of the raiding? OP mentioned they were really cold and not talking much right when the content dropped.

[@MasterOfCrows]

This was from different game but i was raiding of course and i wouldn’t say this did happen to me exactly the same but when i was raiding in destiny (kings fall) i got messages from my ex bf accusing me of cheating when i didn’t i broke out crying in the mic an the people i was with in the raid group was worried for me because how bad it was… What happened….why are people like this…

[@jommana847]

i think they should have a sub if this has been planned for a long time just in case this thing happens for a planned raid

[@ditzyhere3138]

Oh sh*t I thought this was gonna be over the conversation happening on Twitter. Good timing or best timing?

[@MikeE_wf]

I came to FFXIV to retire from world first racing in destiny. Destiny is intense on day 1 raiding and I can't mentally handle it anymore. I got my world first and I'm done.

[@sarahisunrelatable]

wooooow some people really just need to go roll around in the grass… forget just a touch.

[@bluezhift]

OP did the right thing! I'm glad their brother was OK! Stuff like this and the current SA controversy raging on Twitter, keep me far away from hardcore raiding! Casual MSQ and venue enjoyer here, and IRL always comes first.

[@xxsonata]

these are extreme cases. ive been raiding since 2013 and been in multiple statics and have never encountered anything like this. dont treat "drama" as the norm, it makes no sense.

[@Eliyanyx]

Came for the drama

[@solakendend5866]

I would be pissed if I took a week from work and one guy has an angry 13 years old brother destroyed my prog.

[@coffeegamermomof3665]

Dang these stories rough ❤

[@Grumphy_Bear]

Should send the DMs to enix, any threat ingame or via discord or alike = perma ban. its sad some people cant handle IRL vs a game.

[@zillahstar]

Umm so his brother had a argument with his dad. I wouldn't really call that a family emergency. Honestly i would have given my brother some food and let him watch me play. He could have called his dad later. I'm not saying the raid group was right at all btw. Also If i was the little brother and trying to get away from my dad the last thing i would want is for my brother to call my dad when i am still upset

[@matcha-corgi]

Your point is reasonable, but it's also reasonable to say that OP would have their priorities wrong if they left their brother out in the cold just to prog with the static.

[@Pretty.Melanin]

Ahhh, the typical no-life XIV player behavior. Where the game is the everything, even the very air that they breathe. Truly sad individuals. 😂😂😂

[@djhyuga9711]

I feel like the problem with ff14 and games in general is that people take it way too seriously and forget that its nothing but coding at the end of the day. I get that this is high end content so you need to be on your “A-Game” but its not that serious. I wanna get into raiding but only for fun, i dont care how much we fail and how long it takes its just entertainment.

[@EbonySeraphim]

Personally, I don't rock with men/boys/people who are so immature they have outbursts like that and don't take it upon themselves to step up and fix it later. I had a set of (now mostly former) friends and one of them did this during a gaming session of Dota2. Not that the other two had any sensible support for what the one was doing, but I had enough self respect to leave mid game despite how "bad" that is in Dota2. I didn't need approval from the others to realize how shitty the one was being in that moment. People who say stuff like that at minimum, must take the steps to apologize on their own. If they don't, they are booted from my life. There's no power/desire strong enough in me around gaming that would allow me to justify that kind of bullshit. Moods can be tested, and people can get testy, but if the content of what they say spills outside of the game and conflates your entire human worth, it's bad. Say what you want to say within the game itself has further tolerance even if I think you're wrong (like the initial part of the bad savage cohealer item giveaway drama), and mention maybe your disappointment and feelings on the matter -- that is something I don't need an apology for probably. Ideally, blow ups have an ounce of positive feedback too. Like "what does this person really want?" Maybe you'll hear them say something extreme like "you never cast ____" -- and you do, but their feedback is they think you need to cast it more. But if during a blow up they are only stating how much "you suck" or "don't have any value" with nothing remotely objective and measurable to work with, it's probably over. Don't try to convince them otherwise. That's a child's tantrum and they need to not be a child if they want working relationships with adults.

[@CogniVision]

You only get one chance to world first, so regardless of the reason you're going to have a lot of angry people if that chance gets ruined because of unexpected circumstances. This level of toxicity is expected. If you just care about clearing and doing content you don't need to join some world first sweaty assholes. And I'm not surprised this was on Aether, literally the place with the most toxic sweaty asses that aren't even that good at what they do. I've seen the most toxic stick up their ass dudes on Aether who can't even clear consistently with a 15% epic echo crutch.

[@AoyagiMei]

If the group was still on Alpha 3 on day 3 then they were already out of the running for the world first race lol. Should have just settled for a day 4-5/week 1. I kinda of understand the group's pov though. A lot of hardcore raiders are kind of "losers" without friends or family out side of the game, and they genuinely expect you to fully commit to the raiding hours without any real life stuff getting in the way. I've also run casual statics and asked for full commitment because it was just a few hours a week. If something comes up, that means half or all of prog gets missed. That's okay once and for genuinely emergencies, but if it's frequent and 50/50 every time because someone has shitty circumstances, you just have to kick someone. Just don't be mean about it.

[@franmanpr]

SAY THEIR NAMES!!!

[@meadowdear]

Seriously, they shouldnt be allowed into any groups world first or not. Disgusting people

[@marcw286]

if i have this right, day one got v1 and v2, with day 2 and 3 for v3, sounds like day 3 and maybe 4 were just starting v4, they shouldve been like "yeah, take some time to sort things out." especially if they have 2 days in the week. With the pace they had, it wouldn't be hard to assume they just needed another maybe 20 hours to get v4 down. I don't know how long the whole brother situation lasted or took to calm down but, like you still got monday and tuesday morning to finish. This isn't to say the brother situation shouldve been rushed or anything but, it didn't seem like it was going to be the full weekend either. This is to say if it was a week 1 group, but it sounds like it was a world first group by their attitudes. Not saying how they reacted was right or good in any way, but it would explain why they got so upset. If this was r/AmITheAsshole I'd 100% say OP was not the asshole, life should come first and OP did just that, took care of his brother in a time of need instead of playing a game.

[@CmonstahxD]

Idk i rly feel both sides of this tbh while i will say the statics reaction was over the top i get it at the same time. II get irl issues. But a kid who just got in an argument and that's it ? I'm sorry if u chalked my world's first race because of some small shit like that you're getting cussed out. However outside of a world's first race scenario though , if the same issue were to happen they would probably be more understanding. But world's first race ? Nahhh fam that's messed up . If OP little brother wasn't like injured and he was safe I'd tell him go watch TV or something in the living room and get back to the race. Sounds to me like OP didn't realize what he was signing up for imo. Yes I know this is a hot take . But for ppl who want to get sweaty and are already irritated cuz they've been going so hard to get their run fucked just at the end over something that happens in everyone's family idk I can't help but feel bad for both sides. They coulda been a little less anal towards OP and OP probably coulda continued idk maybe that's just me . I wasn't there so I'm sure idk all the details but based off what we've been told that's how I'm feeling

[@BeneaththeMask69]

This whole game can be cleared in PF. It ain’t that serious to get World First in FFXIV lol. Not like how it was back in WoW where blizzard would invite the top raiders. FFXIV devs don’t even invite world first raiders to fan fest haha

[@mo17]

Preach!! Speak that truth!!

[@markup6394]

whats that to do with anything in this story? Besides, from what i heard Arcadia begs to disagree...

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

@@markup6394 This sounds like an excuse to bring up the WoW vs FFXIV argument again and honestly I'm not sure what they're bragging about when WoW literally has to cater to add-ons to the point where they're a requirement, but to each their own I guess. Just ignore it 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@markup6394]

@@MariAbbas-dq4et true...

[@BeneaththeMask69]

@@markup6394 there’s plenty of reclear parties for M4S and TOP on PF. Those are the hardest content FFXIV has to offer. Last I checked, there’s no way players can pug a full 25m mythic in WoW.

[@lisahayakawa1191]

Man for that language whoever this raider static that op joined is just acting like a child and probably a no lifer. To op I am sorry you have to go through that and you deserve bunch of cheer up and don't let those guys make you feel bad beside they don't pay your sub and they have no right to say that and you can still enjoy for fun after all the game is not gonna go away even though it's a long time ago when balmung was formerly aether data center and not all raiders are bad. And I hope you enjoy the current expansion you are at op.

[@MyraTheEditor]

if they were gonna be that upset and awful over an inconveniece to their raid they shouldve had subs lined up

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

@@MyraTheEditor exactly, glad I'm not the only one to question why they didn't have subs. Like what if someone got into an accident? There was a power outage etc?

[@Infinitenull]

Raiding is serious business, it's life or death!

[@MissyHasMunchies]

It was very sweaty back then. Crazy story, thanks for your content!

[@FromHJH]

take out popcorn

[@ReiHeineken]

Are these re-uploads? Feel like I already heard this story.

[@pathra]

It just means you were at my live reading two live sessions ago. I had a break and didn’t get to upload some stories yet. Many peeps who don’t watch the live sessions don’t get to hear the stories until it’s uploaded 😊

[@ReiHeineken]

@@pathra Ah! That makes sense! I didn't even think of that.. Yeah, I've been watching the livestreams lol

[@markup6394]

To be perfectly honest... I get where these raiders come from. They've planned for settling down for hours at a time, focused to get this done. Then, at the last moment, someone drops out, ruining it for everybody. I'm not excusing their reactions, which were totally off the mark, but I understand their sentiment: RL comes first, and any of them, any of us, would've done the same. But what are they if not real-live people, depending on OP? Who now cant finish the race? Real people who set their lifes on hold for these few days, who labor under a limit. Their lifes and time arent worth any less.

[@cynicalmanatee]

This is definately one side of the story for sure. And I agree with you. If I took 1-2 weeks of PTO to join this race, and someone in the group leaves half way for any reason? I may have the restraint to no say anything, but I would absolutely be pissed that now not only my goals for a fast clear is ruined, but effectively my PTO for the year went to nothing. People have this "hardcore Raiders are toxic for this" but the time commitment for a world race attempt vs a comfy week 2-3 clear is VERY different.

[@MidnightEkaki]

Its fine to be upset and disappointed, thats natural. However that does not excuse verbally harassing someone for it. You should have had the understanding that human beings are just that and things can go wrong, you're just setting yourself up for disappointment if you think you can go hours and days expecting the lives of multiple people will be 100% uneventful and nothing will come up for them. In professional sports they have things like sub players, medics and a bunch of other safety nets for when/if things go wrong. Gotta be thinking like that if its such a serious thing.

[@markup6394]

@@MidnightEkaki Im not defending them, Im offering an explanation. Because youre right: if it was so important to them, having one or two bench people should be mandatory.

[@SusanFaulkner-c3v]

I 109% believe this story cuz ffxiv has the worst community in online gaming the difficulty spike between expansion is insane as someone who has a life it's hard to keep up

[@raventhorX]

Gotba couple of drama stories from FF myself. Honestly feel like the whole community has gone toxic, or at least theyve stopped hiding it as much. Subs expured right now but im debating if i want to return or not. Anyway, first story is i was participating in runs for the second extreme trial of dawntrail. Things were going alright, rarely made a few mistakes. Part was initially a practice party anyway. Managed to get 3-4 clears before a lot of people had to leave. After waiting for the of leader to repost, they disbanded instead. Figured aight then, ill just find another group. Turned out there werent too many groups with openings for me, but i noticed the pf from my prior pf leader was posted, though surprisingly they had locked out all my jobs that i had at level 100 with the exception of 1 for some reason. I was tempted to join on that one to see if i get booted but decided not to risk it. Instead i sent a message to the pf guy hoping to get some answers and letting them know they forgot to block one of my jobs. Never got a response though. Btw it was a healer role that wasnt blocked out and the runs we did prior i was a tank.

[@xxsonata]

you let a single pf of randos affect you that much? just move on dude. ive been kicked and called bad and i still raid ultimates. the fact is people will just be assholes sometimes, hiding away and avoiding doing things you want to do because of that is just unhealthy.

[@raventhorX]

@@xxsonata oh i only shared one story bro and that one was the most minor.

[@ReverseLuard]

This dudes never really raided before because this attitude and wave of abuse is standard in any game that does raiding. Spent so much time on the receiving end it got me to the point I don't game as much as I used to. Edit: Finishing this now that im done with, funnily enough, my raid - This attitude got so normalized because no one wants to say anything, then when you do say something, you're the worst person in the world, to the point you get compared to a famous Austrian painter (IYKYK). For a rough idea of how normalized it is, I got removed by my old guild because I refused to let someone sit there and tell people not to play the game, to uninstall, etc. Then when I got the focus, I was literally [Austrian Painter] because I rolled on a piece of loot I needed that was a rough 100 ilvl upgrade on a toon I intended to main and was taking loot away from other players (who already had higher ilvls). The kicker to all this was I was raid leading at the time. And because there was a rule by the GM that I wasn't allowed to talk OUTSIDE raiding (made when the guild formed), it just got insane. We were clearing faster than most other guilds were despite being a literal fresh guild. The level of normalizing abusive behaviors is insane to me. And this isn't including the rest of the weaponized spectrum that went on with just THAT group. This is only the tip of the whole iceberg.

[@Nero_Voidstails]

the reason why I say ff14 community is toxic haha just a little exemple on many xx)

[@eldenlion5850]

*Example

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

I won't say the community at large is toxic but there have always been toxic people like in any other community. As a person who has been playing since Beta, I can remember a lot of toxic things that happened, hell the reason we don't have voice chat is because Yoshida straight up said he was hoping the time it took people to type out toxic things would deter them because the party might leave them behind. The reason you FF community has a "Nice Image" isn't because everyone is nice but because the rest of us don't put up with them so they get shoved down to the pits of hell in public but they crawl back up obviously.

[@Nero_Voidstails]

@@MariAbbas-dq4et neither does I but like since post EW those situation seem to be more and more common in itself

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

@@Nero_Voidstails Well that's because the game has been getting more attention. You don't typically see toxic people out in open world, you see them during duties and duties are typically what get shared with the world. Even my examples of Toxicity mostly took place in duties and early PVP. People in PVP mostly seem chill now. The only open world Toxic thing I remember both has something to do with an FC. One of them I was actually in and straight dipped when they started the BS.

[@Aethyea]

hell to the nah

[@longleaf0]

Controversial take: I think the person should have got their brother settled down, explained that it wouldn't be fair to the rest of the group if they stopped raiding, and continued to raid. The break due to the unexpected thing happening is what it is, but making the group wait while they sorted stuff out *and* then go back on discord and tell everyone they're quitting wasn't a good way to handle it. I've been the raid leader in situations like this. It *REALLY* sucks. Especially in a 10man (WoW) or 8 man (FFXIV). It's almost impossible to find a replacement. Usually the only replacements you will be able to find are people who have been kicked from other groups (usually because of their attitude or because they are not up to it), and while you're trying to find a replacement everyone is super stressed from burnout and lack of sleep and an awareness of the time ticking away, that coveted server first, or world top ten (I've never led a group with a real shot at a world first, and only got one world top ten finish) is slipping away, second by second as you try to put out fires among the group caused by the stress. I absolutely don't condone the messages that were sent, but by quitting you've essentially wasted an entire week of raiding time for the other people and that should be acknowledged.

[@NotGuy64]

L take

[@MahakalaMatrix]

@longleaf0 Controversial is right. There's a massive difference between someone intentionally disrespecting the time and dedication of their group, and having an emergency situation pop up. It does suck for something like this to happen, but in this case it obviously sucked just as much for OP. I'm sorry you feel world first on a FF14 savage raid is so "coveted" that you have to feel genuinely anxious about it. That sounds like a miserable way to experience a raid tier.

[@roxiane]

Real life always comes first my brother, this is just a video game.

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

@@longleaf0 Um, no? This is also why you scout for alts so that if something does happen you have someone who can step in. So like if someone got into an accident that morning, they would have had to look for someone else anyway, someone has a power outage, Internet is acting funny. The bottom line is, this is a game, unless they were streamer or KZbinrs, they weren't getting paid for it, that weren't going to die from not getting World First. Under no circumstances was that raid more important than his brother. You have no idea how long it would have taken to get lil bro settled and with all due respect...what kind of dick tells their little brother who was distressed enough to run away "Hey I know you're going through something right now but it's not fair for me to spend time on your problems and thoroughly make sure you're okay because I'm raiding on a game right now" you're asking to come back to a missing brother because he'll straight up believe you don't care about him.

[@sagakun06]

@longleaf0 hold this L my guy

[@Cadugaming]

Nobody cares about drama, we just want to play and clear. Real life stuff should be kept at the door when playing a gane. No one wants to play with someone who complains all the time

[@hugofreitas6799]

And ppl call wow Toxic lmao.

[@MilesNocte]

Wow is inarguably worse than this story, on a very regular basis

[@omensoffate]

Talking about mistakes and issuing blame isn’t abuse 😂

[@MariAbbas-dq4et]

@@omensoffate It is depending on how you do it and you also don't know if they were assigning blame objectively or based on feelings and pride. I had my co healer blame me once, saying I wasn't healing during Titan EX when I was literally Solo healing while they did nothing but damage so when I would get trapped in the rock, guess how much healing was getting done?

[@despain8726]

This game sucks ass

[@cfai84]

You know what's the best - here are my top 3: 1. People take 1-2 weeks off, fomo the F out of the new contents. Then unsub because they complain about that there's not enough content. 2. People pull virtual world into real world like its reality. Like great if you do. That's when the time you spent on these internet can be replaced with a superjacked body if you were to spend them at the gym 3. Everyone that speaks somehow need disclaimers, if not, every freaking word that butthurts someone will get screencapped or clipped shown to the world that you are standing on one side of the drama. Wtf? Go to work (if not find a FT job), go home, work out, play the damn game, sleep, repeat. Its healthier, and its common sense. Here. Go work at McDonald's for 40 hours per week, you make $480. Equivalent to 3 years of FF14 Sub.

[@xxsonata]

not everyone can do those things. i'm disabled and playing 14 is my way of socializing and feeling like i can work together with others. i cannot drive or go anywhere without a ride etc. you are speaking from a very narrow perspective and not considering other reasons someone might play an MMO. i dont agree with unhealthy no-lifeing a game to the detriment of your health, but not everyone else has the ability to do other things like go to the gym and get a "superjacked body." or work. so we do what we can to socialize. saying it's common sense to live a certain way is dismissive of people who have to live differently and makes you seem pretty ignorant to the world.

[@cfai84]

​@@xxsonata You’ve raised an excellent point. I am actually in the same situation, which is challenging, particularly since I once enjoyed participating in various sports and physical activities. Now, I work from home as a Financial Analyst, a position that took me three years to secure due to the limited flexibility that corporations often show in hiring individuals with disabilities. I appreciate your perspective and agree that there are indeed some actions we are unable to take. I respectfully disagree that our circumstances have any thing to do with the three key points I raised. I also need to emphasize again of my third point. The absence of a disclaimer in my statement have just proven that some readers will get offended, as it may be interpreted as dismissive toward people in similar situations like us. It’s important to ensure that such general statements are not misinterpreted as being directed at specific groups when that is not the intention. I believe we should avoid assuming that general statements are always personally targeted unless explicitly stated otherwise. Disclaimed - and need to disclaim again. This is not meant to be passive aggressive. But mutually agreed. Have a nice day.

[@nauscakes1868]

Controversial take, but I do think OP was in the wrong. When you're doing world first prog, you're not just "goofing around with the boys," you're playing at a near professional level. It would be like being on the Football team going for the Superbowl and you drop out because your brother is having a bad day. Of course, those kinds of teams DO have extra players on standby. But let's be real. If you were on the field during the Superbowl and your family member had a bad day -- you would be very hesitant to walk off. You'd tell them to chill out for an hour while you figure this out, and then catch up immediately after the game. There's a reason why I don't competitively raid, and I don't do any kind of crazy gaming. I like to keep it casual. But still it's important to recognize that while real life is important -- commitment to one's responsibilities are important too. Imagine I'm a doctor and my wife is having a bad day. I can't just tell all my patients "good luck," while I check out. But again, that's why they pay a lot. High reward, but high investment. When MOST gamers aren't responsible for much beyond existing, it's hard to get them to grasp responsibility. It's easy for someone who works at McDonalds to blow off a day of work, because it doesn't really matter. But if I blow off a day of work someone could literally die. And to be fair. My wife married me knowing I had a career like that. I hope OP learned their lesson, and decides to avoid competitive gaming. It's not worth it. Don't do it if you can't commit. And if you're hosting a group like that, get back-ups. And ironically, when you have to have back-ups, it turns everyone into replaceable cogs in the machine. If you want to be replaceable, you become a cog. If you want to be important, you gotta commit. You never get both.

[@brentyetter2216]

Things do happen things you have no control over and if your going to treat someone like shit over a video game either stop playing or go play in traffic

[@miltonpitts4185]

@@nauscakes1868 so…..you can’t be happy for clearing any tier raid in prog? It’s people like you that say this and legit makes me never want to raid hardcore. Yes, it can be serious, but just because it is serious doesn’t mean you can’t take 2 seconds to be happy you passed x raid tier Especially seeing a lot of people on FF14 don’t raid let alone have people to raid with outside pf. You missing me

[@nauscakes1868]

@@brentyetter2216 It's not "just a video game" to World First people. That's like saying the Super Bowl is "just a football game" or that the Olympics is just people running around and goofing off. The problem here isn't that it's taken too seriously, but that OP signed up for something so extreme when they should have just stuck to casual raiding. OP had no business being in a World First group if they didn't have a world first commitment. You can disagree all you like, but you'll just never get what it's like to be part of something that extreme. And that's good for you! Because your world won't have to clash with another. To bridge the gap. I AGREE WITH YOU, that no one should be taking games that seriously. But I'm also staying in my lane. I'm not playing in the Superbowl and blowing it off because my nephew had a fight with his dad. I'll stay in my lane and play with a bunch of millennial dads, where we're all on the same page, lol.

[@nauscakes1868]

@@miltonpitts4185 Sorry I missed you, lol! I think understanding is important. Let me see if I can explain it again. Imagine football right? You'd have casual games playing with the boys for fun. You'd have college games that are still for fun, but there's a little more on the line if you are great at it. And then imagine you're in the Superbowl. -- So to bring it back down to raiding. Imagine there's casual raiding. Hardcore raiding, and then World First raiding. If you're someone like me, who just wants to play a game and have fun. You don't sign up for the World First raiding, lol. It sounds extreme, but OP was in the wrong for signing up for the most extreme form of raiding, and then acting all surprised Pikachu face when people take it seriously. Can you imagine if one of the teams during the Superbowl had to call off because they're missing some players. And they just forfeit the game? It's a huge difference to be with a bunch of casual dads messing around in the local park, and another to be in the Superbowl calling it off. You don't have to agree with me that the Superbowl is way too intense. You don't have to agree with me that World First clears are intense. But that's how they are. OP should have known better, and avoided World First groups. That was on them.

[@brentyetter2216]

@nauscakes1868 actually it still is just a video game that doesn't change